{"sf1_id":134237,"sf2_id":"e3QxpQQn","title":"Killed in an Instant","author":"Eliza Skipper Heart","words":509,"posted_at":"2010-03-25T22:29:00.000Z","tags":["M/F","Psychological","family gone","hurt"],"url":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/134237-killed-in-an-instant","original_url":"https://sofurry.com/s/e3QxpQQn","image_url":"https://cdn.sofurryfiles.com/submissions/thumbnails/f6/0a/f60a1113-6832-43ae-951d-7bc91228d5bb","description":"","content":"\u0026nbsp;\n\n\"Can I have another piece of pie, momma.\"\u0026nbsp; Those were the last words my son ever said to me.\u0026nbsp; He died at the age of 17.\u0026nbsp; I had just made some apple pie and Nova cut him a slice and sat down and ate the whole slice, that's when he asked if he could have another piece of pie.\u0026nbsp; My husband and I heard three gun shots.\u0026nbsp; One was to Nova, the second one was to my husband's head, and the third was to my stomach, which carried my unborn daughter.\u0026nbsp; My neighbors called 911, and the paramedics said that my unborn child was dead, but I would be ok if I got to the emergency room right then.\u0026nbsp; Before I left I saw Nova dead with blood gushing out of his head.\u0026nbsp; Harrison, if survived, would suffer mild brain damage, and would not be his normal self.\u0026nbsp; I was the only survivor.\u0026nbsp; I swore to my family that I would find whoever did this and take my revenge.\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nThree months have passed and every clue I received was a dead end.\u0026nbsp; I had no family left.\u0026nbsp; I was all alone, with no hope of finding whoever killed my family.\u0026nbsp; My friends would call me obsessed.\u0026nbsp; But I would call myself lost.\u0026nbsp; How could I let my family die without knowing who killed them?\u0026nbsp; My so-called friends told me to move on and forget it ever happened.\u0026nbsp; But it feels like there is a hole in my chest and that there is no way of repairing it.\u0026nbsp; I even resorted in thinking that it was a supernatural murder.\u0026nbsp; But I was reassured that that wasn't the case.\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nEvery night I try to go to sleep, I wake up violently screaming.\u0026nbsp; I see their faces coming at me saying their last words.\u0026nbsp; I also see my unborn daughter all grown up telling me, \"Mommy, why did you let me die?\"\u0026nbsp; I can't even imagine why I would be the blame for their deaths.\u0026nbsp; I guess I lived and they didn't.\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nThere are three kinds of fear for me.\u0026nbsp; One of my fears was to not find who killed my family; the other would be dying my self.\u0026nbsp; I never thought to replace my family with other people, it wouldn't seem right to me.\u0026nbsp; And the third fear is that I will never be in Heaven with my family.\u0026nbsp; So as I dream very sad dreams, I think about the losses that I have taken as well.\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;I haven't eaten for 2 days now and I am still not hungry.\u0026nbsp; I might eat something small here or there but nothing too big, just enough to keep going.\u0026nbsp; I will never eat the meal that we ate as a family.\u0026nbsp; It was green beans, grilled chicken and home made macaroni and cheese.\u0026nbsp; And I will never eat apple pie again.\u0026nbsp; It's a simple paranoia that I have developed over the past three months.\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\n  \n  \n\n"}