# Disturbance in the Neighborhood (HMOFA) Author: PapaDelta Tags: Boar, Contemporary, First Person, Food, Greentext, HMOFA, Human, Humor, Hyena, SFW This a little green I wrote a while ago but forgot to post anywhere. A family man gets a visit from a few hyena children, much to his displeasure. ~500 words \>Be me, upper middle class family man who lives in a large house in the middle of suburbia \>Hear the doorbell ring \>Ah, that must be the mailman here to deliver my tenth amazon order for the week \>It's probably either my gourmet coffee or new yoga mats the wifey ordered \>I open the door and- \>Gross \>Three tiny little yeenlets stare up at me with their stumpy little muzzles, behind them is a red wagon filled with boxes \>Looks like two boys and a girl based on the flowers in her fur \>Probably stole them from Mrs. Smith's garden, I'll have to tell her to look out for yeenlets in the future \>"H-hello mister." Says one of the boys. "We're here to raise funds for our youth swimming team." \>Impossible, everyone knows yeens can't swim \>Yet I can't help but feel the urge to entertain them \>"And what are you trying to sell me?" \>The girl reaches into a box on the wagon \>"Cookies!" She happily answers. "We got peanut butter ones and mint ones and chocolate ones and caramel ones and..." \>She goes on for what feels like an eternity \>Damnit, though I know if I give them any money they'll just buy guns, drugs, or booze I find myself unable to say no to a few boxes of minty sweets \>"I'll take three, no, four boxes of the thin mints." I reluctantly state, my heart filled with shame \>"Thank you! That'll be twenty dollars sir." Says the girl, retrieving my cookies \>I bring up my wallet and pull out a twenty \>Guess this is twenty more dollars in some catnip dealers pocket now \>I give her the money and she gives me my cookies \>The future gang members wave goodbye and pull their cart away \>I wave back with a forced smile \>How many bullets for a ghettoblaster can a twenty buy, I wonder \>I close and lock the door behind, moving to the kitchen \>There I'm greeted by my boar wife and our litter of piglets \>She's got her top off and is breastfeeding our two newest additions while at the same being snout deep in a bowl of cereal \>It's spilling all over the table but I don't mind, she'll just lick it up later \>She stops snorting and huffing for a few moments to look up at me \>"What did you get?" \>"Just some cookies dear." \>"For me? You shouldn't have!" \>She saunters over and snatches one of the boxes, tearing it open with a tusk and gobbling down a few of the minty desserts \>God, the tusks on this woman are enough to make a man weak in the knees \>She wipes the crumbs from her mouth and readjusts the two nursing piglets \>"So, have my yoga mats come in yet?" \>"No dear. Not yet." \>She huffs and walks away \>"Damnit, how am I supposed to impress that bitch across the street when I can't practice anywhere! Downward dog my fat fucking ass." \>She walks away and I can't help but stare at her jiggly posterior and swinging tail \>Dayum Source: https://sofurry.com/s/Xnrvz47n Part of the series Garden of Greens (Anthology) Previous: https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/2030354-orange-mocha-frappuccino-wifwolf.md Next: https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/2030360-diamonds-in-the-dark-adhg.md