{"sf1_id":2184110,"sf2_id":"znJXD7ze","title":"Toxic Hearts: A Memoir","author":"nerdycatto","words":2992,"posted_at":"2024-10-01T03:14:14.000Z","tags":["Anal","Anthro","Barebacking","Bugchasing","Canine","Creampie","Doggystyle","Extreme","Fox","Friendship","Gay","Interspecies","Knot","Knotting","Male","Male/Male","Musk","Oral","Penetration","Poz","Pozzing","STD","Sex","Size Difference","Unprotected","Wolf","cum inside","friends","infection","memoir","virus"],"url":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/2184110-toxic-hearts-a-memoir","original_url":"https://sofurry.com/s/znJXD7ze","image_url":"https://cdn.sofurryfiles.com/submissions/thumbnails/42/cc/42cc202b-5634-490b-8eb3-fa6ae873e4f6","description":"This fictional memoir follows Ranulf, a fox whose academic journey leads him to discover the dark world of STIs and STDs. His obsession with these \"lifeforms\" rapidly turns into a sexual obsession, leading him to fantasize about receiving the ultimate \"gift\", an incurable virus capable of spreading through his bloodstream undetected and slowly corrupting his body. This desire becomes more personal and intimate as Ranulf searches for someone special to share this experience with, rather than a mere stranger. Little does he know that such special person is much closer to him than he thinks.  \n  \n\\* This is a fictional story and any similarity with real situations is purely coincidental;  \n\\* Due to the extreme nature of this story, viewer discretion is advised.","content":"Toxic Hearts: A Memoir\n\n  \n\nby Lyon NerdyPaws\n\n  \n\n1 Prologue\n\n  \n\nMy name is Ranulf, a modest fox residing in the quiet town of\u0026nbsp;\n\nSepia Hills. My introverted nature and love for knowledge have\u0026nbsp;\n\nalways been defining traits known to my family and friends. I am\u0026nbsp;\n\nparticularly drawn to the fields of zoology and science,\u0026nbsp;\n\nindulging in my fascination with animals. However, I hold a\u0026nbsp;\n\nsecret, one that has accompanied me for many years and shared\u0026nbsp;\n\nonly with my husband, a select community of like-minded people,\u0026nbsp;\n\nand my closest friend who introduced me to his microscopic\u0026nbsp;\n\ncompanions.\u0026nbsp;\n\n  \n\nI share this story here because I know there are others like me,\u0026nbsp;\n\nwho find fulfillment in their passions for peculiar things. If\u0026nbsp;\n\nyou are reading this and browsing through this forum, then I\u0026nbsp;\n\nassume you understand where I'm coming from and share either a\u0026nbsp;\n\nmorbid curiosity or a risqué mind. Either way, I hope you enjoy\u0026nbsp;\n\nit. Allow me to take you back to my early days in graduate\u0026nbsp;\n\nschool...\n\n  \n\n2 Graduate School\n\n  \n\nAt the age of 24, my modest family provided enough support for me\u0026nbsp;\n\nto start my journey into graduate school. I took on part-time\u0026nbsp;\n\njobs and persevered to cover the rest of my expenses.\u0026nbsp;\n\n  \n\nFrom the very beginning, I was determined to achieve my academic\u0026nbsp;\n\ngoals and personal dreams of becoming a full-fledged professional\u0026nbsp;\n\nworking with animals. I enrolled at my local state university to\u0026nbsp;\n\npursue a doctorate in zoology, building upon my background in\u0026nbsp;\n\nbiology. While I had always been fascinated with the animal\u0026nbsp;\n\nkingdom, my interest in \"undead\" creatures, specifically viruses,\u0026nbsp;\n\nled me to take additional classes in epidemiology and virology.\n\n  \n\nI bonded well with most of my fellow classmates, and as someone\u0026nbsp;\n\nwith a strong libido, I engaged in multiple sexual encounters\u0026nbsp;\n\nwith many of my male peers. Remus, a handsome equine, with his\u0026nbsp;\n\nimpressive endowment, filled me whole, while Théo, a mischievous\u0026nbsp;\n\nsnake, had a skilled tongue that surpassed any mammal's ability\u0026nbsp;\n\nto pleasure a shaft. Despite these intimate experiences with my\u0026nbsp;\n\nfriends, I knew they were healthy individuals with clean\u0026nbsp;\n\nlifestyles. As such, they would often release their seed inside\u0026nbsp;\n\nme, leaving me feeling satisfied.\n\n  \n\nHowever, amidst these encounters, darker thoughts about sexually\u0026nbsp;\n\ntransmitted infections (STIs) and diseases (STDs) ran through my\u0026nbsp;\n\nmind. In my virology classes, we studied them extensively and I\u0026nbsp;\n\nfelt a strange connection to these microscopic lifeforms. When I\u0026nbsp;\n\nreturned home, I delved into studying them as a hobby, learning\u0026nbsp;\n\nabout their mechanisms and life cycles. Scientists still debate\u0026nbsp;\n\nwhether these creatures are truly alive or not, but for the\u0026nbsp;\n\npurposes of this memoir, I will treat them as living beings.\n\n  \n\nDuring my second year, I befriended Levi, a quiet but friendly\u0026nbsp;\n\nwolf who transferred from the biochemistry department due to\u0026nbsp;\n\nchanging interests. We quickly bonded over our shared interests\u0026nbsp;\n\nand even my old classmates seemed to enjoy his presence.\u0026nbsp;\n\nInterestingly enough, rumors circulated that Levi was single and\u0026nbsp;\n\ndid not engage in any sexual or intimate relationships. This\u0026nbsp;\n\npiqued my curiosity, but I didn't dwell on it too much.\n\n  \n\n3 Dark Desires\n\n  \n\nAs the second year progressed, my mind became increasingly\u0026nbsp;\n\nobsessed with fantasies of STI and STD transmission among living\u0026nbsp;\n\nbeings. At first, I tried to suppress these thoughts but\u0026nbsp;\n\neventually I gave in to the realization that these lifeforms\u0026nbsp;\n\ngreatly influenced my sexual desires. I stopped using protection\u0026nbsp;\n\naltogether with my classmates, often daydreaming about receiving\u0026nbsp;\n\na nasty bug from one of my friends.\n\n  \n\nAmidst these fantasies, there was one that superseded all others.\u0026nbsp;\n\nIt centered around a particular virus known as the master of all\u0026nbsp;\n\nSTDs - a virus that had no cure and freely flowed through your\u0026nbsp;\n\nbloodstream, slowly corrupting your body's cells until it\u0026nbsp;\n\nconsumed you entirely. The mere thought of this virus entering my\u0026nbsp;\n\nbody through my back and gradually taking over my healthy cells\u0026nbsp;\n\nwas enough to make me incredibly aroused. I began fantasizing\u0026nbsp;\n\nabout receiving this virus from someone special to me.\n\n  \n\nThrough my extensive internet searches, I discovered that there\u0026nbsp;\n\nwere others like me - people who referred to themselves as \"bug\u0026nbsp;\n\nchasers\" because they enjoyed catching \"gifts\" from strangers.\u0026nbsp;\n\nHowever, the idea of a stranger sharing their strain with me\u0026nbsp;\n\nusually turned me off, as I believed such a life-altering\u0026nbsp;\n\nexperience would be more meaningful with someone close to me.\u0026nbsp;\n\nUnfortunately, I felt doomed in this aspect - or so I thought at\u0026nbsp;\n\nleast.\n\n  \n\n4 Soul Secrets\n\n  \n\nAs the sun set, Levi and I finished watching a mediocre movie.\u0026nbsp;\n\nDespite its flaws, we shared some laughs. By then, we had become\u0026nbsp;\n\nclose friends. We went back to my apartment and enjoyed a\u0026nbsp;\n\npleasant meal together. With a smile on my face, I expressed my\u0026nbsp;\n\ngratitude for our friendship, causing him to reciprocate.\n\n  \n\nSuddenly, I remembered Levi’s alleged reputation of not having\u0026nbsp;\n\nany sexual experience with anyone in our university or\u0026nbsp;\n\nneighborhood. My curiosity got the best of me and I asked him\u0026nbsp;\n\nabout his chaste behavior.\n\n  \n\nLevi's smile turned serious as he looked down at the floor.\n\n  \n\n\"If I tell you, will you still be my friend?\" he asked nervously.\n\n  \n\n\"Of course, Levi. You are one of my closest friends and I promise\u0026nbsp;\n\nwhatever it is, it will stay between us,\" I replied sincerely.\n\n  \n\nWith a gentle smile and a playful wag of his tail, Levi walked\u0026nbsp;\n\ntowards me. He removed his shirt, revealing an attractive figure,\u0026nbsp;\n\nbut what surprised me was when he also removed his pants and\u0026nbsp;\n\nunderwear, exposing his masculine underside. My eyes widened as I\u0026nbsp;\n\nnoticed a biohazard symbol tattooed above his shaft.\n\n  \n\n\"I hope this explains why I avoid intimate interactions with\u0026nbsp;\n\nlocals,\" he said in a low voice.\n\n  \n\nI was in shock, not because of disgust or judgment, but because\u0026nbsp;\n\nthe person I had been searching for was standing right in front\u0026nbsp;\n\nof me.\n\n  \n\nShortly after, we both looked down at my visibly erect member.\u0026nbsp;\n\nLevi smirked knowingly before gently guiding me against the wall\u0026nbsp;\n\nbehind me.\n\n  \n\n5 Dawn of a New Chapter\n\n  \n\nThoughts swarmed my mind about my dear friend, and before I could\u0026nbsp;\n\neven speak to him, I found myself picturing him mounting me and\u0026nbsp;\n\ninfecting me with his virus.\n\n  \n\n\"I see someone is lost in thought,\" Levi said sarcastically.\n\n  \n\nHe stripped off my pants and saw how aroused I was. He only\u0026nbsp;\n\nintensified it by gently rubbing my shaft.\n\n  \n\n\"Is there something on your mind, little Ranulf?\" he asked with a\u0026nbsp;\n\ncondescending yet endearing tone.\n\n  \n\nHis words only made me more excited. After struggling to compose\u0026nbsp;\n\nmyself, I gestured for us to return to the couch. By then, we\u0026nbsp;\n\nwere both completely naked. Levi had a handsome figure - fit but\u0026nbsp;\n\nnot overly so - and emitted a masculine scent that I found\u0026nbsp;\n\nintoxicating.\n\n  \n\n\"How long have you been positive?\" I inquired.\n\n  \n\n\"Five years,\" he replied with a smile.\n\n  \n\n\"Do you take medication? Where did you get it from? What's your\u0026nbsp;\n\nviral load?\" My curiosity got the better of me.\n\n  \n\nLevi sighed and smiled back before answering.\n\n  \n\n\"I only take enough medication every few years to prevent\u0026nbsp;\n\nreaching a terminal stage. A friend from college gave it to me.\u0026nbsp;\n\nFor all intents and purposes, I have a high viral load.\"\n\n  \n\nI found myself immensely turned on as he spoke.\n\n  \n\n\"Do you share it with others?\" I asked eagerly.\n\n  \n\n\"Only with those who want it,\" he replied.\n\n  \n\nAs if guided by instinct, I knelt down in front of him and began\u0026nbsp;\n\nteasing his shaft with my wet canine tongue. Our knots were\u0026nbsp;\n\nvisible to each other, indicating that we were both filled with\u0026nbsp;\n\nheat.\n\n  \n\n\"I would be honored if someone as wonderful as you would infect\u0026nbsp;\n\nme with your strain,\" I said seductively.\n\n  \n\nLevi's moans grew louder as I pleasured his member and fondled\u0026nbsp;\n\nhis knot in earnest.\n\n  \n\n\"Are you absolutely sure about this?\" he asked one last time.\n\n  \n\n\"Yes, I've wanted this for so long, and I would be blessed to\u0026nbsp;\n\nreceive your virus, my dear Levi,\" I replied.\n\n  \n\n\"Then I will happily give it to you, my friend,\" he said with a\u0026nbsp;\n\nsmile.\n\n  \n\n6 A Life Changing Gift\n\n  \n\nLevi grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me to my feet. He\u0026nbsp;\n\nasked me to wait while he went to the bathroom, leaving me\u0026nbsp;\n\nconfused yet excited about what was to come. As I thought about\u0026nbsp;\n\nmy long-awaited dream becoming a reality, an overwhelming wave of\u0026nbsp;\n\nhappiness washed over me. The idea of my closest friend injecting\u0026nbsp;\n\nhis strain into my body and letting it slowly adapt and become\u0026nbsp;\n\none with me felt so invigorating, almost romantic.\n\n  \n\nWhen he returned, he showed me my own toothbrush and explained\u0026nbsp;\n\nthat it would help the virus enter my bloodstream more\u0026nbsp;\n\neffectively. He warned me that it might hurt a bit, but assured\u0026nbsp;\n\nme he would be gentle. Levi mentioned that his strain was\u0026nbsp;\n\nresistant to conventional drugs as it came from a long line of\u0026nbsp;\n\npeople before him, adding to the excitement of the experience.\n\n  \n\nWe headed to my bedroom, where I had a double bed for us to use.\u0026nbsp;\n\nFollowing Levi's instructions, I knelt on the bed in a\u0026nbsp;\n\ndoggy-style position.\n\n  \n\n\"You have a lovely butt, Ranulf. You'll make a great host\" - Levi\u0026nbsp;\n\ncomplimented me.\n\n  \n\n\"Thank you, Levi\" - I replied nervously, but eager to begin.\n\n  \n\nAs he penetrated me with the toothbrush bristles, I let out a\u0026nbsp;\n\nsmall cry from the slight pain. But soon enough, pleasure took\u0026nbsp;\n\nover and I moaned as the bristles caressed my insides. Levi was\u0026nbsp;\n\ncareful not to be too rough with me. After a few minutes, he\u0026nbsp;\n\nremoved the toothbrush and showed me the trace of my blood on its\u0026nbsp;\n\nbristles.\n\n  \n\n\"Your insides are now lightly torn and bleeding. This means that\u0026nbsp;\n\nwhen I reach my climax, my strain will easily enter your\u0026nbsp;\n\nbloodstream and convert you. Are you ready?\" - he asked with\u0026nbsp;\n\ndelight written all over his face.\n\n  \n\nIt was clear that Levi was experienced in sharing his strain with\u0026nbsp;\n\nwilling individuals, but his friendly demeanor and gentle\u0026nbsp;\n\napproach put me at ease. With a deep breath, I looked back at him\u0026nbsp;\n\nand gave my final answer.\n\n  \n\n\"I'm ready. I'm grateful that my best friend will infect me. I\u0026nbsp;\n\nhope you enjoy it as much as I do\" - I said with a smile.\n\n  \n\nLevi grinned back and gently grabbed my hips, pressing his erect\u0026nbsp;\n\nshaft against my delicate butthole and teasing me.\n\n  \n\n\"I'm honored to do this myself, Ranulf. Thank you for giving me\u0026nbsp;\n\nthis opportunity\" - he whispered.\n\n  \n\nAs his shaft slowly entered my body, we both moaned in pleasure.\u0026nbsp;\n\n  \n\n\"You're tight. It feels so good\" - Levi groaned\n\n  \n\nHis hard member filled me, perfectly suiting my submissive\u0026nbsp;\n\nnature. He began thrusting deeply, sending shivers of pleasure\u0026nbsp;\n\nthrough my body. As someone who had experienced similar\u0026nbsp;\n\nencounters before, being with Levi - a close friend - made\u0026nbsp;\n\neverything more intense and enticing. His movements were smooth\u0026nbsp;\n\nand soon we were both panting and moaning in unison.\n\n  \n\nAs he continued to pound into me, I grasped my own member and\u0026nbsp;\n\nstroked it in time with his thrusts. The sensation of being\u0026nbsp;\n\nfilled while also pleasuring myself was pure ecstasy.\n\n  \n\nOur eyes locked and we shared a mutual smile. \"You feel so good\u0026nbsp;\n\ninside me,\" I told him between gasps. \"Your throbbing member is\u0026nbsp;\n\nhitting all the right spots.\"\n\n  \n\n\"Your body is incredible too,\" Levi replied, his voice strained\u0026nbsp;\n\nwith pleasure. \"It's tight and warm, just how I like it.\"\n\n  \n\nWe closed our eyes and let ourselves get lost in the moment. But\u0026nbsp;\n\nsoon, Levi pulled out and asked me to stand against the wall. He\u0026nbsp;\n\nlifted one of my legs and entered me once again, sending new\u0026nbsp;\n\nwaves of excitement through my body. With each thrust, I could\u0026nbsp;\n\nfeel his musk filling the air around us.\n\n  \n\nThe sound of our combined moans echoed through the room as I felt\u0026nbsp;\n\nhis climax approaching. The anticipation built up inside me, like\u0026nbsp;\n\na wave threatening to crash against the shore.\n\n  \n\n\"I can't hold back much longer,\" he panted, his breath hot\u0026nbsp;\n\nagainst my skin.\n\n  \n\n\"Do it,\" I urged him, craving the forbidden act that would\u0026nbsp;\n\nconnect us in a way like never before. My body ached for his\u0026nbsp;\n\ntoxic seed to infect me, to intertwine our DNA and make us whole.\n\n  \n\nBut he teased me first, savoring the moment and testing my\u0026nbsp;\n\nlimits. He wanted a stronger plea before giving me what I\u0026nbsp;\n\ndesired. \"Please give me your poz load,\" I begged desperately,\u0026nbsp;\n\nfeeling the weight of my virgin cells begging to be infected.\u0026nbsp;\n\n\"Infect me, make us one.\"\n\n  \n\nWith a primal roar, Levi couldn't resist any longer. He slammed\u0026nbsp;\n\nhis body against mine and his knot locked into place with a feral\u0026nbsp;\n\nclick. I felt every throb of his shaft as it aggressively pumped\u0026nbsp;\n\nhis infected load deep inside me. In that moment, our bodies\u0026nbsp;\n\nbecame one, both of us giving in to our twisted desires.\n\n  \n\nThe overwhelming pleasure of being filled with my best friend's\u0026nbsp;\n\nvirus sent me over the edge and I released my own seed onto the\u0026nbsp;\n\nwall in front of us. Our bond was sealed forever in that act of\u0026nbsp;\n\nnature, his infectious strain spreading through my bloodstream\u0026nbsp;\n\nlike wildfire. As I basked in the aftermath, pride and joy\u0026nbsp;\n\nflooded through me at the thought of carrying my closest friend's\u0026nbsp;\n\ngift within me. This twisted love was something only we could\u0026nbsp;\n\nunderstand, and it bound us together in ways no one else could\u0026nbsp;\n\never comprehend.\n\n  \n\nWith a gentle sigh, I lowered my leg and Levi and I took a moment\u0026nbsp;\n\nto catch our breath. The knot between us slowly loosened,\u0026nbsp;\n\nreleasing a wave of pleasure throughout my body. Levi's loving\u0026nbsp;\n\nlick and smile filled me with warmth and contentment, causing my\u0026nbsp;\n\nown shaft to twitch in response.\n\n  \n\nAs the knot finally came undone, we both gazed at the mixture of\u0026nbsp;\n\nhis warm seed and my blood dripping out of me. It was a visual\u0026nbsp;\n\nrepresentation of the bond we had just formed - an unbreakable\u0026nbsp;\n\nconnection that would now forever link us together.\n\n  \n\nLevi approached me with tenderness and planted a kiss on my lips,\u0026nbsp;\n\nwhich I eagerly returned. \"Welcome to the poz community, dear\u0026nbsp;\n\nRanulf,\" he said with a grin. \"My strain is now a part of you,\u0026nbsp;\n\ngrowing within your body. And if you choose to spread it, it will\u0026nbsp;\n\ncontinue to evolve.\"\n\n  \n\n\"I am honored to have been infected by you, Levi,\" I responded\u0026nbsp;\n\nwith genuine emotion. \"I always hoped it would come from someone\u0026nbsp;\n\nclose, and there is no one I'd rather share this experience with\u0026nbsp;\n\nthan you.\"\n\n  \n\nWe held each other tightly, reveling in our permanent connection\u0026nbsp;\n\nand the emotions that came with being carriers of the same virus.\u0026nbsp;\n\nTogether, we would help it grow and evolve into something more\u0026nbsp;\n\nbeautiful and stronger - a new chapter in our lives as members of\u0026nbsp;\n\nthe poz community. As we sat on my bed, basking in the afterglow\u0026nbsp;\n\nof our intense encounter, our hearts were full of pride and\u0026nbsp;\n\nhappiness for what we had shared.\n\n  \n\n7 A Lasting Friendship\n\n  \n\nLevi and I sat on the bed, my paws trembling with excitement as\u0026nbsp;\n\nwe discussed his virus. He gave me some advice for adjusting to\u0026nbsp;\n\nmy new lifestyle - testing myself in a few months and refraining\u0026nbsp;\n\nfrom sexual interactions with unsuspecting individuals. As a\u0026nbsp;\n\nmember of the poz community, he welcomed me into his group chat\u0026nbsp;\n\nand offered resources to help me integrate into this world. I\u0026nbsp;\n\npromised to be a responsible gift-giver when the time came. Levi\u0026nbsp;\n\nsmiled and patted my head, assuring me of his support.\n\n  \n\nWith our friendship clearly growing stronger, I ordered some\u0026nbsp;\n\nsweets and fancy snacks to celebrate my conversion. That night,\u0026nbsp;\n\nwe slept together in our underwear, a small gesture of gratitude\u0026nbsp;\n\nfor the life-changing gift Levi had given me. I drifted off to\u0026nbsp;\n\nsleep, content with my future and proud to be part of something\u0026nbsp;\n\nbigger than myself.\n\n  \n\n8 Epilogue\n\n  \n\nMonths passed by and my life was going well. I had adjusted well\u0026nbsp;\n\nto the latter years of my school and made friends who were also\u0026nbsp;\n\npositive. One evening, I received a testing kit and was ecstatic\u0026nbsp;\n\nto see that not only was I positive, but also carrying a high\u0026nbsp;\n\nviral load. My body was now fully infected with the virus,\u0026nbsp;\n\neagerly spreading through my veins and ready to infect others. I\u0026nbsp;\n\ncalled Levi and we went out to celebrate at a fancy restaurant\u0026nbsp;\n\nwith our positive friends. That same night, we went to visit one\u0026nbsp;\n\nof Levi's friends who was a tattoo artist and I got a biohazard\u0026nbsp;\n\nsymbol inked above my shaft using contaminated equipment, proudly\u0026nbsp;\n\nrepresenting my identity as a positive person and a joyful\u0026nbsp;\n\ngift-giver.\n\n  \n\nSome weeks later, I met another bugchaser from a nearby town. He\u0026nbsp;\n\nwas a shy but kind feline, and we spent a lovely day together.\u0026nbsp;\n\nFollowing the same method used by Levi on me, I eagerly\u0026nbsp;\n\ntransmitted my strain to him, making him the first person to\u0026nbsp;\n\nreceive it willingly. Little did I know that this feline would\u0026nbsp;\n\nbecome my husband and beloved partner, but that is a story for\u0026nbsp;\n\nanother time. Levi went on to become a successful researcher at a\u0026nbsp;\n\nprestigious university and has become one of the leaders in our\u0026nbsp;\n\ncountry's poz community, advocating for STD awareness and\u0026nbsp;\n\nproviding support for those who have contracted the virus\u0026nbsp;\n\nunwillingly.\n\n  \n\nAs for me, I am now 33 years old with a fulfilling job as an\u0026nbsp;\n\nanimal conservationist and a beautiful partner who shares my\u0026nbsp;\n\nstrain. I am proud to say that my strain is not only fully spread\u0026nbsp;\n\nthroughout my body, but also thriving and evolving in dozens of\u0026nbsp;\n\nwilling individuals across the country who placed their trust on\u0026nbsp;\n\nme. Our community may face challenges, but we have each other's\u0026nbsp;\n\nbacks and will continue to support those who have become like us\u0026nbsp;\n\n- whether by choice or unfortunate circumstances from their\u0026nbsp;\n\nperspective."}