# My Gym Partner's Bro is a Total Woof

Author: Eightane
Tags: M/M, Manwhore, Monkey, Oral, Rhino, Shark, manly, masculine, woof

My Gym Partner's Bro Is A Total Woof

By Foxy Boy

-Again, naturally.

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

Through the hallowed halls of Charles Darwin Middle School, a miracle had manifest.

First period was freshly over, the students making their way to the next class in relative silence. No accidents or injuries to disturb the crowded hall, "Bull" Sharkowski was into none of his usual tormenting shenanigans, and the eighth wonder of the known world... Jake Spidermonkey was calmly, inarguably reserved. Traipsing the cold ceramic tiles in a pure mimic of average, even **normal** strolling; effectively mute alongside his best friend, Adam Lyon, and their compadré, "Lupe" Toucan. No trace of manic splendour, that would any _other_ time be chiseled on his countenance.

From his human company, this brought the natural response. "What's wrongwith **you** today?"

No reply, just a faraway stare at his shuffling feet.

It was Lupe's turn to play the coaxing card, in her thick Spanish brogue. "Come _on_, Jake, we know you better than that. Don't be a stupid essay, spill the beans already."

The brim of his hat tilted back with the rise of his head, and the accompanying sigh. "You just _can't_ leave a guy alone." Eyes widened, and two monkey palms elevated in an open, shaking cringe. "Even one whose _very **existence** _ has lost half its meaning!"

"Why?" Adam intoned, quickly shifting to a backstab-smile. "Did they make it illegal to pick your nose?"

Zealous head shakes.

Lupe, keen on the possible fun, joined in. "So they cancelled the butt-shining monologues?"

More vehement head shakes, with igniting rage.

"...Or did miss _Duvall_ have a bad week on the pop charts?"

His whole body began to quake. One index finger shot up in the air, and with lips pursed, undiluted fury was channeling his aspeny frame.

But an instant later, all relaxed, his arms fell to his side, and the fuzzy brow drooped like a dying orchid. "_Ah_, what's the _use_. You'd never understand, in a million, _bazillion_, **_fafillion_** years."

Lupe's glare narrowed. "Oh, **_I_** get it. It's about Windsor's new _hobby_."

The look he returned, that of a deer in headlights, proved her accuracy.

Adam jumped at the chance, to show his usual puzzlement. "Wait, **what** new hobby?"

His contemporaries faced him, halting their inter-hall stroll. Lupe's harsh tropical voice shattered the ice. "_You know_, the ROTC. That patriotic wave that's sweeping the country, like my grandmother's whisk broom on a sea of camouflage ants."

Still incredulous. "... So _that's_ why we haven't seen him since Tuesday."

A nod, gifted from Jake.

"... And his locker door smells like Pine-Sol."

Another one, from their hovering lady-bird.

"... And **_nobody_** thought I'd like to know."

Jake's head swung to the side, in nonchalant pose. "Can't blame _us_ for bein' behind the curve, slo-mo." He began a slow saunter beyond them. "You know, projectin' your faults _can't_ be healthy. I'd see if Mr. Mandrill could knock that out for ya."

The diminutive boy, clenching his diminutive fists, sprinted to catch up. " **ANY** way, I don't see why it bothers you. So he's at boot camp or whatever, so you go a little while without... _That thing_ you guys are always giggling about."

The thought of his point, delivered a brief grin to the primate's countenance.

Adam, ignorant of this, continued. "... I mean, if it's **_that_** great, why would it be so _funny_ after half a year?"

Jake made no attempt to contain the chuckle. " **Miles** over your head, ma' hairless friend. It's complicated, maybe when you're older."

"I'm _three_ _months_ older than **you**!"

"Yeah, well it doesn't-"

" **_STUDENTS AND FACULTY OF CHARLES DARWIN MIDDLE SCHOOL, MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION_**", thundered Principal Pixiefrog's voice at the aid of a crackling PR. " **_I HAVE GOOD AND BAD NEWS TO DISPENSE. FIRST, WE REGRET TO INFORM YOU, OUR INDUSTRIAL ARTS CLASS IS CANCELLED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE. HOWEVER, WE'LL BE SHARING AN HONOURED GUEST AT TOMORROW'S ASSEMBLY, ONE I'M SURE SOME OF OUR MAMMALIAN STUDENTS WILL APPRECIATE. I'LL GIVE YOU A HINT; WHAT'S TALL, PINK AND IS FOOTING THE BILL FOR OUR NEW TROPICAL EAST WING?_**... **_OH, AND NURSE GAZELLE AND VICE-COACH FERRET, PLEASE REPORT TO MY OFFICE AT ONCE. BRING AT LEAST TWO BUCKETS OF OXI-CLEAN._**"

Struck silent and stopped by the dubious news, most were clear in their total ignorance. Only Adam seemed to react, and with little more than thorough disinterest. "_Great_, another politician-and-picture day. Just when life couldn't get any brighter."

At this cryptic conclusion, he resumed strolling ahead of his mystified friends.

Jake's gaze shot to the exquisite toucan. "What's eating **_his_** jock strap?"

"Who _knows_", came the shrill return. "I think he needs a week off. Go sun himself on a tall rock, chase an apollo, whatever short bald lions do." Her wings fluttered to slowly urge her forward, leaving Jake to stare in brow-arched confusion.

His hands, shot thoughtfully to his hips. "Looks like it's high-time to crack that big, freckled noggin' of his. And I'll have to do it without Windsor's refined, handsom... _Book-smart_ help." From catching his noticeable slip, he moved to pound fist-against-palm, in show of a sneaky idea. "Guess I'll be using every bit of my trademark devious charm for _this_ one."

The very next moment, he caught in his lower peripheral a shadow on the tiles, eclipsing his own; this was followed by a voice, deep and very familiar. "Monkey **please**... You wouldn't know 'devious' if it bit you in the _taint_."

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

"So you see, my impressionable buddy, the grocery aisle of life will _always_ be stocked with false standards."

Legs akimbo under his aqua-coloured smock, betwixt a ring of Yankee candles and facing a single chair, Maurice Mandrill sought to enlighten the wayward youth seated before him.

"I know that, sir, but I don't think you or **any** one else in this school, can imagine what it's like."

"_Don't_ stress, give your doubt vibes an undress-"

"-That **really** isn't helping... And I don't see how flipping my attitude will, either. Nothing's gonna change the heartache of having to worry that I'm... A _tiny_ man."

"James, _many_ boys your age have concerns about this. But worry won't solve it, any more than it solves the issues of the world."

"... Look, _Mr. Mandrill_, _sir_, am I supposed to just grin and bear something that has **_this_** _much_ effect on my happiness?"

"Well, maybe you can't whip a DNA strand into shape, but you can still rise above your limitations."

"Um... I thought that's what **_makes_** them 'limitations'. Just think about _this:_ How could _you_ get by, with no more than **two** inches?"

"James... We can't _all_ be elephants."

"No, but I wish someone besides me could be the ant for a day." At this, the miniscule pupil tossed his hat over two antennae, affected an unsatisfied scowl and crawled down the leg of his chair. As he skittered for the un-opened door, he prepared himself for the practical limbo it took to manage this feat, when - as if by will, magic or divine intervention - it swung wide to his utter convenience. Or, perhaps it was the young human boy behind it.

Adam's eyes dropped to the crimson bug traipsing between his shoes. "Have fun, _big guy_, he's in **rare** form today."

"_Adam_," The mandrill counselor cooed in his most non-intimidating tone, "How can I pick your brain, little man?" The red-tinted eyes instinctively widened, as they caught the furious grimace of an insect who hadn't yet vacated the doorway.

Stepping forward, Adam quickly pulled the glass panel shut behind him, wrinkling his nose at the combined scent of sandalwood, patchouli oil and french vanilla. With a firm 'plop' into the faux-mahogany seat, it was rather clear his issues were of the serious variety. "Mr. Mandrill-"

"-Call me Maurice." The mystic counselor's palms came together in lighthearted gesture.

A pair of human eyes cut to the side. "_Maurice_ Mandrill-"

"-Just Maurice."

" **_Counselor._**"

"... Well, any port in a storm, I suppose."

"I... Have something on my mind, and it's kinda _important_ to me, and I'm _not_ sure I know how to talk about it."

Maurice did his best to appear spellbound. "By all means, childlike comrade. Just pour out your innermost soul, and I'll be the sold-out audience."

"Well, I-" He stopped short, as an audible 'thud' sounded from the outside hallway. Only silence followed, so he opted to continue. "I know it's probably _strange_ for a kid like me to wonder about this-"

"... There's nothing _strange_ under the sun, my friend. Only that, which is misunderstood."

His frown proved the annoyance from an ill-timed interruption. "_As I was saying_, I... Well, it's just... I feel like I have no idea where my life is going."

This struck a chord of concern in his 'willing audience', a fact made obvious by the earnest shock commanding his stare. "_Whoa_, _deep stuff_ there, little dude. Perhaps I should bring out the **big** guns." Reaching behind and beneath himself, he produced the long form of a digeridoo. "The indigenous Australians have a ballad for such times. I believe it goes something like this-" He lifted its considerable heft to his untrained lips.

The rattled blush in Adam's cheeks proved even a few seconds of this sat beyond his tolerance. " **_Ingrid moved to a different school and Windsor's at some kind of army camp and Slips blows all his time on this stupid "Warcraft" game and Jake gets weirder and random-er every day and I just want to know why all my friends have to go CRAZY!!_**"

Naturally, this sucked every breath of confidence from the room, and Maurice's demeanor. In a motion rather unusual for him, the 'enlightened' mandrill tossed away the wind instrument like so much rice at a wedding. "A thousand pardons, my low-statured pal, I wasn't keen on how much this troubles you." At the speed of sound, he dropped to sit with hands on elevated knees, legs tightly together. "I won't harsh your emotional buzz with my tunes. Proceed where we left off."

"That's all it _is_, counselor. I mean, I know we don't just stay the same forever, and Mom says it's a part of 'coming into your own', but I was kinda starting to get _used_ to things around here, and even **_like_** it with them around, and... _I don't wanna go through the rest of middle school by myself_." Through the ending sentence, his lips began quivering, and soon this erupted into a full-fledged sob.

Maurice tried as best he could, knowing well he was far out of his league. Two primate palms went up in a 'cease and desist' motion. " **_Hey_** , _hey_, no one said you're gonna be by yourself. Things look the darkest before dawn, and even if _none_ of your buddies come around-"

The shrill pitch of Adam's sobs escalated.

"_Even_ **_IF_** that happened, and I don't dig that it will, you have _plenty_ of time and chance to hook up with new bud's, and maybe even chill with old ones you'd forgot you even had_._"

High-decibel cries dwindled, and promptly dissolved into shallow sniffles.

"_There_ you go, it's never like it seems at the time. That purple haze you're cruisin' through is a natural phase, it visits **everyone** your age. Just keep on the sunny side, and don't go chasing waterfalls, and soon this'll _all_ be a distant fever dream."

For some reason, Adam actually considered this for a moment, and it seemed to allay his fears. As he hopped down from the cold wooden seat, it was possible to catch the faintest glimpse of a smile. "I guess I can see how that's true. Thanks, Mr. Mandrill... Maurice. You gave me a lot to think about." His simple qualms subdued, he headed for the hall with a bit more spring in his step.

Clear as crystal, was the abundant relief on the counselor's face. "No worries, compadre. Glad I could pull you out of the rabbit-hole."

The human left hand yanked open the glass door, and turned to punctuate his discussion. "Yeah, I **really** felt like today was gonna be terrible, but now I know that's all just in my mind. It's great that even people _your_ age can understand me!"

Maurice initialized a pleasant nod, but it quickly fell into nothingness. "Godspeed, fellow son of mother Earth."

The chestnut-wrapped panel pulled tightly shut. Once the latch was heard, Maurice fumbled through his pocket for a mirror, and began assessing his wrinkles.

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

"I'm _serious_, you have **_no_** idea what he's like!"

It was doubtless, few students of Charles Darwin Middle had ever seen Jake like this. Ill-at-ease would be a gross understatement... More like insecure, intimidated, and inarguably dismayed at the presence before him.

Its shape was extensively similar, though well-onto a foot taller. Longer hair, larger ears, and - even merely standing, as he was - still _radiated_ a liberal dose of swagger, to match the smug smirk on his wider chops. One thing they had in common - besides the obvious trait of species - was the taste in hats... Blue, billed, and backwards.

The younger students around them paid little attention... The older, and the few faculty members in close proximity, would look right at home in a wax exhibit on 'pure awestruck terror'.

The taller ape fielded the query, in piercing baritone. "What, just 'cause he took the throne after I'd blown this popsicle stand? Cover up, bro, your _ignorance_ is showin'."

The shorter's index finger shot up to the face of his counterpart. " **_You're_** the _ignorant_ here, old man. Pixiefrog has a _boatload_ of tricks up his sleeve for when I step out o' line... Just last week, I had to sit through Miss Loon's writing class, and not throw even **one** spitball."

"Well, golly gee, the _bastard_."

"I know, right? So how d'ya think he'd be when he finds out there's an **_18_** _-year-old_ loose in the halls? _Not_ somethin' you wanna find out, says **I**."

A slightly-meatier set of digits reached out, and gently tucked his pointer back its holster. "Okay, **first** thing, 'ignorant' can't be a _noun_. If you brought home better than C's and D's, you'd _know_ that."

Jake's silence was the fragile butterfly, gliding into an industrial fan. "... Missing my point, _Einberg_."

"-Wrong-number-two, squirt, I'm _ignoring_ it. Look around this dullard's dump... If anything, it's just **achin'** for a nice revisit from _theirs_-truly... See, **he** gets it."

The younger sibling's attention was directed to Vice-Coach Ferret, frozen in typical silence several yards distant. The bucket of cleaning powder he'd been ushering to the office lay on its side, dumped at his lower paws, and it was painfully clear on whom his gaze was fixed.

Jared's hand shot up in a static wave. "_Yo_, Horace, long time no see! Still rockin' that lithe figure, eh? You miss me half as much as I missed **_that_**?"

Horace's already-widened eyes did their best to wax even bigger.

Meanwhile, Jake tried _his_ best to shove someone nearly twice his weight. "_There_, I **knew** you'd start that _crap_ the second you could."

"Hey, **_whoa_** -to-the-bro. Just yankin' his chain, and even if I _wasn't_, since when is bein' myself considered crap?"

"_Since_... _Since_..." Jake's previously-tenacious voice trailed off, while his brother's arms slowly went up in a gesture of 'I'm waiting'.

The younger monkey's argument sat in development hell; at length, he imbibed a sigh of desperation. "... Since you always make it so _un_-possible for **me** , when you're around."

Jerr's pupils tumbled like twin wood lathes, and his arms limply fell out of cross. "_This_ again. Look, for the twenty-trillonth time, I'm _sorry_ you take after me, and I'm _sorry_ you can't be as... Smooth or savvy about it." He cracked several knuckles, in assertion of his halfhearted appeal. "Are we **happy** now?"

As Horace tip-toed away, for his original destination, Jake's expression slowly moved to brighten. "Yeah, long as I know you mean it." A mere second of ADHD later, his omnipresent smile re-assumed its home. "So, what brings your woofness, **_king Jerr_** out to this little corner of heck?"

The elder of the two had a good guffaw for the substitute swear. "You kiddin'? It's my old stompin' grounds, I shoulda done this **months** ago. Guess it took the way _you've_ been the past few days..." He imbibed a single light punch to his brother's shoulder, "...To finally put the boot up my ass, and swing me by for some old-school moral support. At the _old school_."

"Oh..." Jake's eyes dropped to the left, in shallow thought. "... So how have I been?"

"You don't know?... Well, **you** wouldn't." Jared gave a light prod at the shorter's shoulder. "Depression-incorporated, chairman-and-CEO-Jake. You've been mopin' around the place like a guinea pig in a study on barbiturates, at the University of Overkill."

The smaller monkey gave a muted sigh, accepting truth. "... Suppose I have. But can you blame me? I mean, you know what me and Windsor-"

"-Yeah, that's been a little-much-obvious too. But hell, it's not like he's **_dead_** , just _away_ for a while." Elevation of a single, sly eyebrow. "And whaddya think he's doing, right now?"

Jake's newly-crafted smirk was a match for his company's. "Thinkin' about me. Maybe more than **_I_** am."

'Jerr' reached out to give his brother's cap a good spin. "Well _nobody_ thinks of you more than you. But I was talkin' more along the lines of, military stuff. Marathon sprints, obstacle courses, push-ups, and on and on. The kinda shit that gets you ripped from neck-to-toe. How's **_that_** sound?"

Jake's expression was, suitably, like a kid in a candy store. "Y'know, sometimes I'm _glad_ we're peas in a pod."

The slightest curl crossed Jerr's lips, as relevant thoughts commanded them. "_Just imagine if you knew what he's in for..._" Thoughts gave way to an answer, or at least, the beginnings of one. "Yeah, just wait 'til you grow into some matu..."

His baritone shrank inaudible, as another, hulking form overshadowed the both of them.

A tower of _easily_ seven feet, flanked with muscles in mixed tones of blue and white, and draped by a thin black tee... All underscored by the infamous braces, and generous 5-o'-clock shadow. Through Jake's terror-filled eyes, Virgil Bullsharkowski slipped carefully in for the kill... Or rather, the maim.

The heavy pounding-together of fist-fins served up a nice introduction, before the nasal alto of his voice cut into the fear factor. "So, little **_monkey_** _man's_ got himself a new _boyfriend_. How ya doin', taller-small-fry, **shake** on it?"

Of course, Virgil would do much worse than simply shake his hand, as evidenced by his wide, menacing grin. All the while, Jerr's focus had little steadiness, moving up and down the solid form of his new visitor. Through his own glee-ridden, barely-hidden smirk, a low mutter carried in Jake's direction. "_This_ is what you walk past, five days a week?"

Though still very frightened, the meaning of his brother's words cut into the terror, deep enough to bid him reply. "Yeah... _Trust_ me, it's **not** as great as it seems."

The elder monkey, upon hearing this, struck a countenance of pure gung-ho to match his quickly-smoothening tone. "Only if you don't take the bull by the horns. _Watch, and learn_."

" **Hey** ," Virgil's cracking tones shouted, "I ask to shake on it, and you stand there whisperin' like a couple o' nosy little _kindergarten girls_? I **_was_** gonna play _nice_ today, but I can see you chumps _don't **WANT** that!!_"

By all accounts, he was ready to lay some major hurting on the pair. But with a subtle adjustment of his shirt, and a clearing of his throat, Jerr set to the task at hand.

"My apologies, man... Jake here had a question about power-lifting, and like always he just _couldn't_ wait."

Bullsharkowski, thoroughly unamused. "_Cattle crap_... And even if I **did** believe ya, you'd **still** be in for a pounding, just _because_."

The focus stayed strong, even through Jerr's growing... _Appreciation_ for the choice of words. "Dead serious, dude. Hell, at his age _I'd_ be curious too, how you got a body like that."

Virgil, though still in his intimidating stance, shed a portion of his guard, and something more of his muted rage... It would seem the key was in place, and like him, **_slowly_** being turned. "... Just curls and sit-ups... But what's with his sudden interest in my tone-age? Never asked **_me_** about it."

Jerr seemed to enjoy the skeptical reception... More of a challenge. "Well you know Jake, he's never good at talkin' about things that _matter_. Reason _I'm_ here right now; said he finally got up the courage to ask, but that it'd still be easier from someone like **me**."

This was a more thorough appeasement for their somewhat... _Dense_ company, and the last shred of anger melted from the towering shark's demeanor. "... Oh. So who _are_ you, then?"

The taller monkey's grin, all but screamed that victory was in his clutches, and he extended a furry hand. "Jared Spidermonkey... Or 'Jerr' to you and everbody else. This poor faggot's older, _better-made_ brother, and a long-past inmate o' this here prison... _Charles Darwin Sing-sing_." Ending with a line he knew would readily amuse, he further-dispelled the chip on a shark's shoulder.

Virgil's infant smile, came across as genuine... Something Jake, even in his growing relaxation, would never expect to see. A right fin - one of two curled in fury, only minutes before - came out to _honestly_ shake. "Well **that's** more like it; better late than never, I guess." Virgil glanced over, and mistook Jake's mix of relief and wonderment for what Jerr so-smoothly interpreted. "So you want a bod like this, midget? I'd start aggressive, do some barbell reps and squat-thrusts. And learn to like protein shakes..." He gave a friendly gnash of metal-strung teeth, "Unless, you think you'd have the _stomach_ to get your protein somewhere's else. Guy like you, I'd start low and slow."

Though letting Bullshark's diatribe go long enough to satisfy, Jerr wasn't about to watch his purpose derail into jock-speak. "Sounds like a champ's advice to me, 'specially if you get a **_strong_** -_ass_ grip like that from it."

"You **_know_** it." With every passing moment, Virgil's ego inflated like a machismo balloon on a tank of compliment-helium. "Hey, your brother's _alright_, Jake, I might just keep him around."

Now, it was **Jerr**'s turn, to slip in for the kill. "Yeah, maybe you could give me some _advanced_ pointers." Free of _any_ shame, he grasped both sides of his shirt and pulled up. "I'm rockin' a small _shmorgasboard_ of abs, but I need a lot more definition. _Feel_ what I'm talkin' about, I know you can't see through the fur."

Through Jake's barely-believing eyes, the tall, ripped shark was taking the bait, running a fin through the carpet of belly-hair, circling all sides of the nefarious monkey. "Yeah, I feel it. You could use a good course of sit-ups... They can suck, but they're worth it."

Jake's mind was a mix of amusement, at what he knew the situation to be, amazement, at how Jerr could so easily lead someone like Bullshark, and another feeling, he _usually_ associated with Windsor. Thankfully, for all involved, even _he_ knew well enough to keep his silence, and let the scene continue in its sumptuous direction.

The elder monkey, finally spilled what any _other_ of his age group would know to be the most obvious pick-up in history... But to a slightly-younger confidant like Bullshark, it was purely innocent. "Awesome. So, you have a place around here you work out? I'd spot you, and you can school me 'til I'm the envy of every doughy dweeb in high school."

Even someone with such weak, exploitable brainpower, could envision the sensei-apprentice connection that fueled so many plutonic _bro's_ friendships. "Matter of fact, I train on the racks in the gym. We just got 'em in, pretty good ones, and nobody **_else_** around here's cool enough to _care_ about 'em."

Jerr could very well have teared up; it was all so much more grand than he would've predicted. "_Fuckin' **a** _, we'll have 'em all to ourselves. Should be a while, before time for second period-"

"-Yeah, why not make use of it." Bullshark, holding fast to a civil grin, gave his new monkey friend a firm backslap, then turned his attention to Jake. "Catch ya later, _shrimp_, me and your bro have **_manly_** stuff to do."

A single moment later, he set off for the gym, with Jerr eagerly in tow. Jake - having so rarely spent **any** appreciable time with his _worldly_ sibling - Quickly found a new appreciation for him... Watching his slightly-longer tail whip up and down in clear excitement, while his head turned to flash Jake a visage of joyful victory. And maybe a bit of immature glee, at the irony of Virgil's last sentence.

For a good, extended spell, Jake just stared off in their direction, with a face of admiration and pride. So affixed were his thoughts, Adam had to poke his shoulder, to make his presence known.

Though his squat, ginger human friend was all-smiles, Jake's _own_ grin could only shrink a size or two, after such a righteous high. "... Oh, it's just my main hu-_man_. So where'd **_you_** play hide-and-seek?"

"Jake, I gotta say thanks," Adam returned, in rare cheerful tones. "I took your advice and saw Mr. Mandrill, and for once he _really_ helped me out. I just **know** today's gonna be **_GREAT!"_**

The runty simian, though puzzled by the ambiguous reply, was happy for his friend's good news. "_Alright_, **Adam**! This is _killer_, you're out of the dumps, Bullshark's out of our hair and you'll get to meet my brother!"

" **_Yeah_** , and it wouldn't be possible without....... Wait, say that again?"

"What, Bullshark's out of our hair?"

"No."

"You're feelin' some joy?"

"No again."

"Get to meet my brother?"

"_Bingo_."

In the span of ten seconds, a pair of ecstatic smiles downgraded to one look of incredulous surprise... And one of terse simian epiphany. " **Ohhhhh** , my bad."

"_Jake_, you have a _brother_?"

Oddly, the monkey's grin returned with great haste. "Heck **_yeah!_** Surprised I never said anything about him... Oh well, doesn't make much difference."

"How come I've never **_seen_** him here?" Adam's face was confusion, with slight unsettlement.

Meanwhile, Jake's exposition came across like reading a dull book. "Oh, he's in high school, _grades_ ahead of **us**. Just here to visit and cheer me up..." His joyfulness returned full-force with memory of moments before, "And mission accomplished! Oh man, you shoulda _SEEN_ the way he worked Virgil over-"

"-So a **_high school_** guy is in here, _right now_?"

Adam may as well've been shaking at this point, and Jake's ignorance wasn't so deep that he'd miss the clear implication. Wrapping one arm around a human shoulder, he sought to soothe his best pal's growing alarm. "_Hey_, chillax, he's no _bully_ or anything. He's like **me** , only bigger and more... _Adult-y_."

The fear in Adam's eyes reached a new peak, and breaking Jake's friendly hold he sprinted for Mr. Mandrill's office, leaving Jake to scratch his head at the dubious reaction.

It was only a short time, though, before Jake's human comrade sauntered back towards him, looking glum and reasonably detached. "Counselor's out. Soooo, your brother..."

As he trailed off, a still-confused Jake picked up the signal. "... Jared."

"... _Jared_. Besides how he's... _Like you_, is he a jock, a nerd, what?"

Jake's reply came with a slight-but-noticeable smirk. "More like _one-of-a-kind_. Hunker down, it's a **_long_** story."

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

Within the sterile walls of Pixiefrog's office, the heads of its namesake principal, Nurse Gazelle, Maurice Mandrill and Horace Ferret, hung low and somber, as a stretcher was wheeled out through the doorway. After a brief silence, the tiny principal moved his attention to their resident, quadriped nurse.

"You've done all you could, Jacqueline. We'll have to trust, the ER's finest will know how to deal with that splinter."

The scrubs-draped feminine figure gave an understanding nod. "It's just _so disheartening_, there are **so** many things that hooves can't do."

Their amphibian executive switched focus to Horace, and his bucket of cleaner. "Well at least we didn't need _that_, for what I _thought_ we would; you can still do a good once-over on the floor, to keep from getting rusty... Oh, **_first_** ," his voice elevated accordingly, "I believe Maurice and yourself had some pressing issue?"

The ferret's head bobbed wildly up and down, as the counselor mandrill's hand reached out to lay on his shoulder. "A full-blown dilemma. A visitor, from the _great beyond_."

Maurice's mystic phrasing, sent a chill up Pixiefrog's rubbery spine. "Y-you don't mean, a **_poltergeist_**?"

Two deadpan shakes of the head returned. "An old student, now under Principal Wolverine, but _here_ instead."

Pixiefrog disclosed a feverish gasp. "_Even worse than I thought_... So we have high-school shenanigans." His eyes shot up, in a seperate and sudden realization. "Which **also** means he's skipping class, trespassing _and_ interrupting our educational duties. Quite a rap-sheet for one morning."

"Your vibes are spot-on, but that's the **_least_** of our problem." Eight sinewy fingertips came together. "You know Jacob Spidermonkey?"

The principal's face showed immediate recognition, laced with a twinge of disgust. "Perfect, what's he done _now_?"

"Nono, _that's_ the payoff. Our little hall-traveller, is his elder brother."

In Pixiefrog's eye, you could almost see the atom bomb dropped. His miniscule fingers clinched the custom-receiver of the office phone, and with shortened breaths he dialed a three-digit extension... The number for what amounted to a school-wide, silent-alarm lockdown.

Maurice was familiar with the tone, from this trifecta of digits... He'd been present many times, when the old principal still dealt with Jared. "Sir, if I may ask, did you just put us on _lockdown_?"

The principal's voice was broken, wobbly, and rather suitable. "Of **_course_** I did, I've heard enough horror stories from _you_, Wolverine and **_half_** the parents at PTA functions!! A principal's _job_ is to **nip** crises in the noxious bud-"

Maurice took a defensive, yet firm stance. "-Oh I know, sir, and I'm on the same wavelength, but... You know how the new system works, it's all automatic and on time-delay."

"This is _not the time_ for idle details, Maurice-"

"-_I'm **saying** _, the doors have all been instantly-deadbolted. And not only is he _not_ safely in here, but we have no idea just **where** he is..."

Pixiefrog's reaction was immediate, culminating in a single, whispered word of despair. "_NO_..."

"... And we're all stuck in this office, for the next two hours."

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

"... Well if all this is true, and he did **half** of what you're saying, wouldn't he be in _jail_ or something?"

Jake's mug was one-part matter-of-fact, three-parts his usual hyper-candor, as they stood against the cold, grimy lockers. "Three things, and I'll count 'em down. _Third_, mom and dad were wizards on the college debate team, so they're _crazy_-good at convincing..."

Both he and Adam were totally oblivious, to the many students pulling on doors that wouldn't open.

"..._Second_, he's the only _non-spiffy_ here to ever pull straight A's, and Pixiefrog said that's _'worth its weight in funding boullion'..."_

They also didn't bat an eyelash, as talking elevated, rabbles formed and they arrived at non-controlled panic.

"... **_First_** , and it _could_ be just another tall tale, but rumour with a bunch of the older kids..." He picked up an air of sly gossip, "... He was a, _teacher's pet_... The _bigger, **burlier** _ teachers, if you get my drift..." Directly following this sentence, Jake's hand shot out in faked exasperation. "Shucks, look who I'm askin' to catch a drift like _that_."

Adam wore the face of defense and frustration. "Oh _c'mon_, just because I've never... _Nnghghn_, doesn't mean I'm **_stupid_** about it."

"Yeah, but it _does_ mean-"

He was cut off by what felt like an earthquake, while a myriad of mammals sprinted back and forth behind them. With their gaze - and curiosity - widened, they stood slowly on their feet, and turned just quickly enough to watch the climax of their miniature disaster. An elephant stomping past with the force to crush galvanized tilework; Phineas Porpoise and his Napoleon-Dynamite run that clipped a locker and slammed his mass into the other side; and a sparrow whizzing by above them, catching its wing on a sprinkler and becoming a temporary ceiling fan.

Standing side-by-side as an American Gothic, speechless and gawking, it was Jake who finally drummed up an end to their silence... While a tiger ran by with his head on fire. "... Adam?"

"... Uh-huh?", returned the stress-rattled boy, in his most dour of tones.

"... When did middle school suddenly _become_ _so **AWESOME** _!?" Culminating with the widest, most euphoric grin possible, he ran out into the mob, fists in the air with gleeful, grinning excitement.

Adam, still frozen and disconsolate, stood like a statue of stone while his eyes followed the to-and-fro motions of an unlikely friend.

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

Overhead light was scarce, with two fluorescent bulbs out and one in its death-flicker. The smell of vinyl and gym shoes pervaded the acoustic gymnasium, and swirled itself in with slightly fresher scents... Namely masculine sweat, and what only Jerr could presently enjoy; the musky substance of dribbling precum.

In mere minutes, his masterful hands had coaxed Bullshark to this scrumptious position... Reclined on a weight bench, head back against its jet-black upholstery, face contorting in varied expressions of carnal euphoria. His shark-endemic pair of sleek male members were out and in full-mast... One with a spit-lubed hand sliding up and down every side of its length, the other buried in the maw of Charles Darwin Middle's most _infamous_ graduate.

"_Ohhhhhhhooo **oooo** _..." The pitch of Virgil's pleasured moans, wavered with every switch of Jerr's varied service... And also due to the fact, that with one hand jerking the clasper that _wasn't_ being deep-throated, the other was positioned just below... Four fingers stimulating every accessible point of Bullshark's prostate, the thumb on a slow, deliberate cruise around the rim of his tailhole. Even as a two-minutes-broken man-virgin, Bullshark would have to be in a _coma_ not to know he sat before a **_true_** professional. But Jerr couldn't be any less, and get such a stalwart nonconfessing closet case to this point at all.

His veteran pleasurer popped the member from his mouth, and moved the thumb of his handjob-limb to hit it against its twin, with his index finger sliding between. " **_Fuck_** _yeah_, I _love_ dudes like you..." His statement came through panting breaths, caked with copious amounts of pre. "... Well-endowed beefcakes, _just_ young enough to **_teach_**." His single point made, he moved the multi-tasking hand to promptly close his lips around the head, for another set of rapid dives.

Even if the burly shark had readied a comeback, he couldn't overcome the moment and say it. With so many blissful sensations to process - a world-class handjob, flawless blowjob, the man-gland service, a damp coolness from Jerr's pre dripping over his tail, and a tender rimming as the cherry on top - all combined with the blissful burn of a short weightlift, Jerr's _chosen_ excuse that set all of this in motion... He was nothing, if not hopelessly speechless. Save, of course, for the heightening masculine groans, echoed from expansive gym walls.

Whether due to his focus on continuing Virgil's pleasure, or his clear lack of a free hand, the insatiable monkey's _own_ uncut member went untouched... Which only made it stiffer, and coaxed more flow of natural lube to drip over his 'partner''s skin. All the while, his tail flicked rapidly - the single part of himself well-nigh uncontrollable in these activities - while his jaw's patch of fur held several ropes of the jock-shark's plentiful natural lube

Recalling rumours of how Jake's tail had a similar penchant, from the 'incident' half-a-year prior, was the only cognitive thought that made it past Virgil's heavenly repose... And while Jerr's slurping soundtrack escalated his experience, the alto-moans he constantly spewed found a rapid elevation.

The promiscuous primate knew _well_ what this carried, and before the tipping point could be reached, his member-serving hand drew back, and the jaw-jacking slowed considerably. Before Virgil could recover his faculties, and ask the cause for this, it was made obvious by Jerr's focusing on the lower regions, and a careful, _gentle_ insertion of his thumb to pop the musclebound shark's black cherry.

They couldn't care less, of the noise from frenzied students sequestered in the halls, or Pixiefrog's cracking voice over the PA system in a futile attempt to advise they 'stay calm, and avoid trampling each other on school grounds'. Virgil's audio all but drowned out the distant melee, and with Jerr's digit riding all the right crevices of his anus, he was rather busy to concern himself with the present version of his classic, familiar aftermath.

While sweatdrops glistened on Virgil's muscular neck, tracing a path to fall beneath their newly-tainted seat, Jerr decided it was time to close the show. Taking his free hand to the temporarily-neglected cock, his head's diving on the second member picked up, even past its earlier tempo, and the rhythm of his fingers against a shark prostate similarly increased. Moments later, when Virgil's moaning matched its previous high, his lips came up to nurse one of two throbbing tips, and there was no going back.

With lids barely open, Bullshark's twitching eyes rolled back in his head, and the fins on his tail swung wildly in all directions. Brace-covered teeth halfway-clenched, he let loose a barrage of whining, shout-level moans, proving the extraordinary sensation of two loads shooting in unison through his aquatic double-dick. As one set began coating the fur across every inch of Jerr's engrossed countenance, the other filled his above-average mouth to near-capacity, and the ardent "woof"-monkey could barely gulp down its weight before the next jet pumped in to replace it.

As the supple shark spasmed in a climax he'd never imagined, it took well-onto a full minute for the immense store of mancream to exhaust itself... With Jerr taking every second's advantage, never easing his battery of hand- and oral-stimulations, even past when the final drop was squeezed out and Virgil's motions drew calmer. Once it was clear the man-loving monkey's job was accomplished, he also somewhat relaxed, toning down to a slow and simple bob on one phallus for nothing more than his own pleasure.

Now, Bullshark's head could finally raise from its upholstered seat. "_That_... _That was_... _Oh_ my **_God_** , _man_..." he panted, in a low and weakened tone.

After some hesitation, Jerr finally tore himself from the continual nursing to speak. "Lemme guess, best workout ever, in the history of _second motives_?"

The still-panting shark made a strong nod. On his face, Jerr - or even someone with **no** experience - could easily tell he was waiting anxiously, anticipating when _and_ what the cock-hungry monkey would choose to extend their encounter.

But Jerr's face had begun to shed its devious smile. As a flood of unsavory emotions crossed it in series, he drew back from the now-puzzled bully, adjusted his cap and set his weight on one arm to hop down. "Man, you _can't_ be anything but tardy right now." His feet hit the ground with a slight squish... Clearly, some of his 'gift' had been missed. "I hate it like hell, but we **_both_** have somewhere to be."

Clear frustration was brewing on Bullshark's features, then replaced by full-on aggravated malaise. With both upper fins on the bench's side, he begrudgingly pushed himself upright. "And what if I disagree, and say this _ain't_ over just yet?" A less-pleasant smile crossed his jaw, in the vein of his normal reputation.

Jerr's countenance was a trio of irked, unamused and somewhat-threatened. "You **_don't_** wanna cross that bridge, beefcake. I'm just as good at _fuckin'_, as I am at _fuckin' you **up** _." With a quick flash of intensity, his eyes strayed to Virgil's lower regions, and the inscrutable grin was back. "You'll see me around, _count_ on it. Meantime, you have some books to brave." Semi-spinning on one heel, he strolled over to the gym's double doors - with a _bit_ more spring in his step - and yanked on the left handle.

Naturally, this got him nowhere.

"... The _fuck's_ wrong with this thing..." He muttered, pulling harder, and proving the door's connection to a failsafe system.

Bullshark strolled up, with something close to an exhausted limp, and confusedly tried his hand at the panel; but not a bit of difference. "Stupid thing won't _budge_. What **_is_** this, a _lockdown_?"

The focused primate's head moved back with an even tilt, having instantly pieced it together. "_So_, they wanna play hardball." Straightaway, he reached under his shirt, feeling the inner fabric near chest-height. After fumbling about for a spell, his hand drew back out in a fist, clutching what looked like a red ball bearing on the end of a crocheted chain.

By now, Virgil was all-curiosity. "You have a _hidden_ pocket?"

He returned a cunning chuckle. "I wear it inside-out... You'd be shocked at how _much_ those dumbasses **never** caught on to." Refocusing his gaze on the heavy panels, it seemed a plan was already in motion. " **_God_** , this brings back so many memories... And they _still_ think they can toy with me. Well the game's _motherfuckin_' _a **foot** ,_ big shots." He whispered, holding the 'chain' up to the door's edge with one hand as Virgil looked on without a clue.

"_One_ thing about this place, your new _frogman_ **can't** know about," he intoned, moving his other hand up to the sandblasted doorframe, "Is how the safeguards are all so damn _simple_." Taking his index finger's claw to the rough surface, he gave a few firm scrapes until it visibly sparked. "God _help_ youif an **_actual_** gun-toting head case, were to stumble in here." After several arcing repetitions, one spark stuck to the woven chain, and revealed it as a fuse. "Like the label says, _retire quickly!"_, Jerr shouted, as Virgil caught on just soon enough to duck and cover like his shorter company.

A loud bang, was far more jarring through the gym's acoustics, as they quickly found out. Returning to their feet, Bullshark stuck a fin's end in both ears, watching the ape's alert motions through curling ripples of smoke as he felt the door handle for heat, then proceeded to try it out. "Holy _fishsticks_, Jerr, you're like a _spy_ straight outta the **movies** or somethin'."

"Thanks, man, but don't _ever_ group me in with those Hollywood pretty-boys. And _don't_ make me explain why-"

It was that moment, when the door's weight creaked open, and pandemonium behind it met Jared's unbelieving eyes.

A few yards back, Virgil was still in the dark of all but the piercing noise. "Oh _crap_, is it a **_fire?_**", his tone suitably trembled.

"_Worse_," came the deadpan remark, "A mob of retard kids, doin' their best impression of Pompeii." He glanced back at the toned shark, with clear and metered thought. "Y'know, you should stay put, and not just 'cause school is _clearly_ out o' session... I'll bet my bro's **right** in the thick of it, and knowin' him, I'll bet even _more_ he's treatin' it like a Mardi Gras parade. It's high time I jerk a knot in his _juvenile_ tail." He stuck one foot through the opening, but Virgil's uncertain words bade him pause.

"So if you find him, will you be comin' back?

Jerr's head swung back to give his new 'buddy' a satisfied smirk. "Stay alive, hunk, and _remember_, whatever occurs I **_will_** fuck you."

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

_Giraffablegirl91:_ U there?  
_SlipsTheElven:_is that you ingrid  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ Of course. :) How r u?  
_SlipsTheElven:_ awesome, fraggin orcs and hustlin gold  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ Oh, I guess that's nice  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ Painting up my newest Barbie. I want her to look like Jem :3  
_SlipsTheElven:_ who?  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ Never mind, my sis has these old DVDs. lol  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ Did you get Windsor's email  
_SlipsTheElven:_ yeah but i didnt open it yet  
_SlipsTheElven:_ been buildin my guild  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ ...Well he says he's hating it there  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ Its boiling hot at the camp, and they run 5 hours a day on 4 hours of sleep  
_SlipsTheElven:_ whoa thats killer  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ Plus, they caught him with his stuffed 'friend' and took it  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ You've heard of peeling potatoes, well they had him peeling bananas  
_SlipsTheElven:_ oh man hahaha  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ That's not funny Slips, it's demoralizing  
_SlipsTheElven:_ nah not that  
_SlipsTheElven:_ i just shot an arrow clean through a level 60 mages ribs from like the edge of a cliff  
_SlipsTheElven:_ his players callin me names i never even heard before  
_Giraffablegirl91:_ :(  
_Giraffablegirl91 has logged off._

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

Within the chaos engulfing Darwin Middle, a marked change was in progress. The jarring vibrations of a thousand paws and hooves on inadequate floor were fading, at the same time replaced by a single, uniform set of two jogging feet, that were _still_ rather loud and heavy as they cut through the youthful mass.

" **_REMAIN CALM_** _!!_"

Those who were too short to catch the orange-hued crew cut floating through the rabble, or too far to glimpse the passing, faded hue of his double-breasted grey suit, could still place Cyrus Hornbill's unmistakeable voice, as its **_un_** -rhino-likeweakness did the best it could to carry urgency. "_THIS IS **ONLY** A PRECAUTIONARY MEASURE, **REMEMBER** OUR **DRILLS**!"_

Despite the assurance in his pitch, nothing was passed down from Pixiefrog in the way of communication; he'd been forced to quell surrounding fears, with no idea of what caused them. But either due to his thundering gait, or the fact chaos eventually turns boring for all involved, he found success in quickly taming those he passed. Of course, he didn't have the time to glance back, and see they were more _curious_ than truly pacified.

"_YOUR PRINCIPAL HAS EVERYTHING UNDER **CONTROL**!!"_ He continued, rounding one of many corners. "_ANY COMPLAINTS OF HIS MISHANDLING, WILL BE DIRECTED TO OUR OFFICES IN..._"

As he skidded to a stumbling, poorly-made halt, his speech cut equally short. Before him were a trio of primates... One human, two spidermonkey, and one of these _clearly_ did **_not_** belong. This time around, it _wouldn't_ be Adam.  
Cyrus gave an instinctual, gratified sigh, seeing what stirred this unholy rabble. For a good spell, he held an unmolested view, while the taller simian had his audience captivated.

"So, point is, **don't** sweat if he's usually in mind to make you fish flakes. Take the right channels, and he's a goddamn _puppy-dog_..." He employed a pause, to chuck Jake's miniscule chin. "... With _benefits_."

Their reactions were _fairly_ similar. Adam wore interest, surprise and a bit of respect for what Jerr had managed, if _also_ with a peppering of disgust. Jake, on the other hand, subtracted the disgust, to replace it with amusement, hero-worship and a dash of arousal. Approaching his elder, he made a weak attempt to back-slap. "Well big bro, you gave me _a_ _lot_ to think about... _Mostly_ when I get home tonight." A firm, ingratiating wink. "So, you plan on toughing it out through second period with us? You could show me how you make those little thimble-cameras, you tested in the locker room."

"Wish I _could_, **_padowan_** , but I've got a _shit-ton_ to see before sundown... Besides, looks to me like they'll **_be_** no second period today. You're welcome-"

"-_For once_, Jared, you're **_FATALLY CORRECT!!_** _"_

The trio of heads swung to meet Hornbill's _dubious_ visage, lording over them like nobody's business. Jerr did a double-take, Jake's jaw dropped like a rock and Adam let out the tiniest of screams.  
In the latter two's eyes, their hulking ginger-haired rhino showed nothing but rage and evil gratification... But there was a flash of something _else_, that could **not** be missed by its proper recipient.

"Jake, Adam, you two are in _so_ much trouble you make Virgil look like high pope of **_spiffy_** _!"_ The implication was good for a few squirms from the accused, while he feigned angry huffs. " **_Get_** _to_ your respective classrooms. I'm cutting my way through this bedlam, and when it's dispersed you'll find out how we plan to deal with this. Now _scoot_."

Adam started away, with a heavy gulp and a nervous jog. Jake followed behind, obediently pushing his butt along with both hands.

Once their absence was clear, Hornbill's laboured huffs gradually faded, into something more... Amicable. He gazed down at Jerr with wizened caution, but also quasi-relaxed solace. Jerr's reply was a look of contentment, recognition, his ever-present deviance and a few others that were hard to place.

"Been a while," began the charismatic primate.

"It certainly has," returned his rhino superior.

"_So_... You **know** you're sendin' them to just another anti-open door."

"Of course. I wanted a quick, fear-striking excuse to get them out of sight."

For many moments, they were frozen in muted gesture... Jerr's eyes trailing up and down the grey-skinned form, Cyrus cracking his knuckles, totally aware of what the ape had on his mind.

Being one with the surname of 'Spidermonkey', Jerr's patience had its expiration date. "Alright, cut the bull and let's get down to basics. What am I _in_ for, and what does Pixiefrog know about me, _besides_?"

"Well," Cyrus began, his tones a bit smoother and more practiced than usual, "To answer your second question, everything you could **possibly** wish he _didn't._ But, he's also a confirmed _dingbat_, so us teachers may have a **_lot_** of say in how things play out for you. Which brings me to your _first_ query..." Hornbill's eyelids drooped a degree or so, and a pair of enormous hands moved to straighten his vest. "... I shouldn't have to _tell_ you what you're looking at. Truancy, contributing to the delinquency of minors... I'll just go ahead and add 'harrassment', and twenty others for good measure." Though firm, his diatribe carried some degree of hesitance. "You _know_ my job, and what it includes. Even if I _didn't_ answer to a no-nonsense bore, you **can't** expect me to turn the other cheek."

The humbled monkey's gaze met the floor, and it seemed he might actually be troubled... For an instant, before the twinkle in his eyes came roaring back, and the infamous grin led his retort. "You underguess me, _kind sir._ I've still got something you'd want..."

"That was eons ago."

"... And it **proves** you couldn't forget."

"Maybe I can _ignore_ the memory."

"Maybe I know you _better_ than that."

"You only **_think_** so highly of your... Your..."

"Just _keep_ on provin' _my side_, fifth-leg."

The moment's thunder was _easily_ stolen by Jerr's able mitts, and he enjoyed the sight of Hornbill fighting - and losing - the battle of his _own_ wandering eyes. "So, we ready to negotiate?"

Taking deeper, extended breaths, the redhead monolith returned a slow, gentlemanly nod. "That depends. And I'm sure you know, on just _what_."

Jerr's eyes widened, to the same degree of Hornbill's narrowing... There was no mistaking any of this, as clearly illustrated by the chimp's tongue circling his chops. "You _always_ sucked at punishment, Cyrus. And I **love** you for that."

The hefty rhino, undoing his vest's topmost button, gave a mien more cocky than his peers would ever expect. "The old, familiar place?"

Jerr's tail whipped eagerly around, like a doberman staring down his favourite bone. "_Damn straight_."

As the calamity around them was winding down, reduced to broken factions that whispered among themselves, no one paid much mind to their tall rhino educator breezing by with a narcissistic gait, gradually unfastening his shirt, exposing the highest tufts of orange chest hair, leading an 'honoured guest' down the corridor to the men's room.

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

Sweating, grunting, twisted and passionate sneers... All of these belonged to Principal Pixiefrog, as he fumbled with a screwdriver nearly twice his size, on a stool that tapered _just_ too far from the doorknob to make jamming it a clear possibility.

Maurice, stuck inside with the rest, reclined on the single desk's edge in absolute boredom. "You know, I don't mean to be the Debbie Downer here, but my _great aunt_ would have more success with what you're trying."

The several-inch amphibian shot him the classic daggers-in-the-eyes. "Of **course** she would... You _told_ me she was a Navy Seal."

"She's also _dead_."

Pixiefrog tossed the tool promptly away, mumbling under his breath, and climbed down from the padded perch. Thoroughly livid, his focus danced between a mandrill whose worth stopped at words, a nurse who was anything _but_ correct for this task... And a gym-assistant ferret, whose muteness would stop any complaints.

It was no tough decision. "She's _all yours_, Horace. Make me proud."

"Ponch," Maurice began, invoking his boss's shortened first name, while Horace's head-lowered scowl passed by. "We've blown thirty minutes, and I'm fairly sure that door is _tighter_ than when we started."

"Don't **_push_** it, mandrill, it's a tough job market out there."

"_No, no_, that's not what I'm saying."

Behind the ferret's silent labour with the screwdriver, was the odd sight of a frog's eyebrow rising. "Oh, so we should phone a technician, get more _modern_ doors, and start enjoying them in the normal _two weeks_?"

"No, I was just... Remember Cabo, three years ago?"

"... Just **what** does this have to do with-"

"-Follow me on this, if it's not _too much_ trouble."

"... Sure, why not. It was a great trip, we all had plenty of fun, _the end_, now let's get back to-"

"-Remember the elevator?"

"... _Oh **yeeea** ahhh_, I'd almost forgot." Slapping one knee, his focus switched to Nurse Gazelle. "You weren't here, just yet... Maurice and I pooled our money, and flew down for a week in the Baja. Three days in, we were riding the elevator up to our hotel room, and the lights went out. _Boom_, no power, and no _power_ meant no **_hydraulics_** in the shaft."

She was good at feigning interested surprise. "My _word_, for how long?"

"Oh, only about **_nine_** _hours_."

A mandrill countenance, took on loads of impishness. "And halfway through our little snafu, we ran out of camp songs." He turned back to Pixiefrog. "Good thing I kept those 'supplies' in my pocket, eh, Ponch?"

Even more unsophisticated chuckles. "You're not _kidding_, or it _really_ would've..."

It was almost visible, the light bulb that went off in his head.

"... _Maurice._"

A casual smile. "Present."

"These are **_school grounds_**."

"_And_? You've never tried that point _before_, the _tens_ of times you've walked in on me."

Stalwart, undiluted seriousness. "Maurice, due to our history, I've been willing to overlook _many things_. Pestering **me** to smoke up on state property, is **_one_** step _too far_."

The flower-child Mandrill lost his toothy smirk, and his focus dipped to the floor. "... You're right, sir. It was dense of me to ask... I should just be mellow, with our making no progress, cursing each attempt's failure, and snapping at each other like a pack of wild detention brats."

Pixiefrog's mood swing, was the very _definition_ of 'instant'. "... You have a lighter on your person?"

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

" **_Ooh_** _hhh **Jeh-** red_, _you don't **know** how much I missed this..."_

Stall number 2, out of 5. As the door tightly latched, dark grey slacks dropped to lie in a heap, covering a reddish-orange tee... Within the cubicle, Jerr had found a way to capitalize on his shorter stature, as compared to the 7-foot-rhino whose knees were spaced widely out. On these broad caps, rested two furry ape hands, anchoring their owner's pose... with naked body straddling Hornbill's legs, drooling at the teacher's pecs and paunch, and the vast amount of thick red hair covering both.

While spellbound by a man who matched his _every_ standard of flawlessness, agile ape feet cupped the immense girth of a **very** bushy manpole, revisiting what its owner always loved... sliding slowly up and down inch one-through-ten. "Same here, _stallion_. Y'know who's doin' **_your_** job, at Diane Fossey High School? Miss Warthog's _aunt_."

Hornbill would've cringed, but in their present state it was all but impossible... Every motion of Jerr's nimble digits, and the rough soles rubbing his giant staff, drew gasps from the depth of his lungs. Two burly rhino arms, could barely keep their peace, grasping the steel bars meant for handicapped patrons.

"You **_need_** to put in for a transfer, Cyrus. Go where your talent can be... _Appreciated_."

This drew a double-edged sneer from his dominator, whose nipples were growing suitably firm. "I'd _expect_ a- **_aa_** _a_s much from you... Well you'll _b_-be happy to know, I _haven't_ ruled o **_Oo_** _uut_ that possibility."

"In that case, lemme drum up some _'incentive'_._"_

Sliding one foot back towards himself, it settled at the rhino-dick's frenulum, commencing a rapid tickle. While Jerr fawned at his masculine 'client', taking in the newly-heightened moans and twitching of Hornbill's fingers, his eyes could only stay put for so long, before they strayed to the gorgeous cock in front of him. Fifteen seconds, was all the time he could spare on the tickle, before self-control ran out, and arm muscles tightened to prepare for the imminent motion.

"_Shit_, I just **can't** hold off anymore. Sorry, man, I owe you one."

"_E- **ehhh** _?"

The following moment, Jerr's arms basically catapulted his upper body forward, rotating at his stomach, to completely reverse his position. With legs now propped over Hornbill's knees, his head was speeding towards the main course, and a wide, practiced ape maw, opened to meet its new charge head-on. In little more than the blink of an eye, his lips went from just above the hung member, to buried in the root of its encircling, fiery manbush.

" **_OhhhH_** _HFUUUUCK!"_

He'd reclaimed his natural element, and relished the gutteral moans he'd caused; along with Hornbill's familiar sandalwood-musk. As his lanky arms were no longer fighting gravity, he wrapped one around the trunk-like thigh, and could at last show his **_own_** manhood some attention. First rubbing the engorged tip, to collect a buildup of fluid, his hand traced down the sides to smoothly coat its meager four inches. Though spider monkey genes weren't _kind_ to him, he redeemed that setback with _absolute_ knowledge of how best to make use of what he had... As Bullshark had so recently discovered.

Seated in this well-served repose, Cyrus could barely pull his thoughts together, so distracted by the intensity of Jerr's mouth working infamous magic. It was _just_ within his abilities, to keep his eyes open as they dipped to watch the blue ballcap rise and lower, and hear the _\*clack\*_ of a furry tail against both sides of the stall door's footing. The rest was a blur to him, well-beyond what a perfect handling of his giant cock would allow. He didn't notice the sound of furious jerking-off just beneath the toilet seat, didn't catch when Jerr would glance up to ogle his manly fuzz... And he didn't see the sloppy etchings on the wall next to his head, making fun of what _other_ simian had seen this same cubicle six months prior.

"_Mmm **MMm** mohhh_..."

The rhino's pitch was a roller coaster of highs and lows, with every swoop of Jerr's tongue on his veiny diameter... And the chimp's flow was only getting stronger. He could even use his teeth to great advantage, gently raking the bottom set across a certain, remembered pressure point midway up the teacher's endowment, coaxing deeper groans and an involuntary thrust from the pachyderm. Each minute the session was extended, another of Cyrus's needs or simple fetishes came back to him, and was straightaway implemented... Such as Jerr's pausing his self-pleasure at one point, to worship the furry pecs and belly of his ex-instructor, in a **_very_** hands-on manner. By this point, it was hard for either to believe how long they'd been forced to live apart from their rituals.

With features still aglow, Hornbill took the left hand from its perch to wrap it across Jerr's cap-cloaked scalp. Rekindling his true, manly-top self, he gave no hint before pushing the ape's head firmly down, forcing it around the throbbing meatstick. But Jerr was waiting for this - one of his all-time favourites, in classic mansex - and wincing at the feel of an engorged glans passing his uvula, his own delighted groan was _barely_ stifled by the obvious. On this single gesture, _every_ sign of Hornbill's pleasure heightened, as did the pace of Jerr's hand feverishly edging his manhood.

Taking the monster's every inch, with all the talent it deserved, little time elapsed before Jerr could feel the ginger-flagpole approach critical mass... Giving a purely-mental, heaven-bound sigh, he braced himself and pumped forward to meet the hard-earned prize.

But just as suddenly as he'd cruised towards the tipping point, he felt the same oversized hand that so easily pushed him down, seize the scruff of his neck. Eyelids shooting open, he was instantly aware of being pulled up and away, just out of lip's reach.

Naturally, his pupils moved to glare at Hornbill's. "The _hell's_ the matter? You and I both know I was **_this_** close to payoff."

The reply was hindered, by Cyrus's need to catch his breath. "You _were_, Jerr, and you're still just as incredible, but... It's been _so_ long. **_Too_** long."

After a brief look of uncertainty, the answer lit up monkey features. "... You want to draw it out. Make it last."

Hornbill's strong jawline accented the shake of his head. "I think you deserve my honesty. At the risk of ruining the moment, or _whatever_ you agree on us sharing, in the four years since your graduation..."

"... I'll _save_ you the speech, big guy... I think I see where this is going." Jerr's self-pleasuring hand made a transfer, to somewhat-nervously adjust his cap. "_Don't_ say it."

"I have to."

"Not in _my_ world, you don't." The smaller of the pair, seemed truly uncomfortable. "C'mon, man, you _know_ what I'll say. Let's leave this shit **_be_**."

"I can't. You _already_ saw through my 'dutiful' act in the hall, there's no _hope_ of hiding _this_. Jerr..."

From the grey tank's newly-softened countenance, Jerr could see a deeper context leap out at him, one he had no desire to meet.

"... I've been saving it for you. Myself, and all I have to offer. It was _always_ yours."

The primate, dipping head to the floor, came within a hair of authentically blushing... But for him, it simply wasn't in the cards. The first phrase of his counter, came low and under his breath. "_Hornbill, you soft, old-fashioned piece o' work_... Okay if I pose a question?"

"Of course." The wistful return came while conscious of Jerr's resistance, tugging forward against the hold on his neck.

"And if you're still feelin' that same sentimental-_itis_, then I'll **gladly** walk down the aisle, with a smile on my face and a bow on my tux pants."

"... Alright." Though Cyrus couldn't predict the imminent, he still had an air of hesitation...

... Mostly due to Jerr's breaking his hold, and proceeding to bat his tongue against the still-throbbing whopper. The question-in-question, came in spurted phrases, broken by dives on his acquired target. "Think of... All the times... I've been your... _\*slurp\* Willing_ meatslave. And then all the others... You _knew_ about... _\*smack\*_ And what little they **_don't_**... Have in common with _you_. Then... Tell me if you'd still think... _Mmmmm_... I'd make a decent spouse."

Luckily, Jerr didn't hinder the teacher's sense of reason. Locking eyes with his insatiable companion, lust-filled ecstacy mixed with knowing, assuaged epiphany. "Th-_aa_-ank you, Jerr, all the same. I could al **_www_** _ww_ays count on you, to be straight up with me."

Two chimp eyes were again tightly-closed, all nervousness had vanished, a free hand reassumed its careful edging, and the overworked throat gave its best ' **_Mm_** -_hmm'_.

Gasping with fervour that gave its previous, climax-nearing height a run for its money, Cyrus near-shouted his final thought. "_S- **So** what **now** ww?"_

Though Jerr wasn't fond of his task's interruption, he cared enough for the trophy cock's owner to humour him. "If you mean... What's next for _me_... _MNnnnn_... I stumbled on... A great dude... Who has _a lot_ to offer..." He extended a pause, to tongue-trace the head's lower perimeter. "And while you still have... A _career_ to work on... _Mmgghh_.... He's able to work _me_... **_Double_** -time." Even while focused on the second advent of Hornbill's nearing-peak, he could still chuckle at the shameless pun.

This time, there would be no rude awakenings from his post... Hornbill said his piece, the conclusion was mutual, and the pulsing, primed dick was _right_ back to its cliffhanger. The rhino fingers which had torn themselves away from the bar, re-clinched it with white-knuckle power... His jaw dropped, hair matted with sex-forged sweat, and knees buckled in and out in unguidable swings. The veins girdling titantic manhood, pumped hard against Jerr's inner chops, and in an instant it was gloriously nudged past the limit. Despite himself, the man-hungry monkey could almost grow misty-eyed at the beauty he heard, in the first of Hornbill's booming moans.

Jerr was glad he could recall the rhino's peaking force, and prepare accordingly. A thick mushroom-head went smooth in purposed inflation, and its servant gave one last swoop on the grooveless tip. From this, the inner flesh welled with his reward, and the _real_ intensity began. Hornbill's stomach heaved with the unmetered ecstacy, as the first creamy jet traced a Mach-1 path down Jerr's gullet, bringing both to blissful, gutteral groans. Beyond control, the rhino's hips rocked forward with each successive shot, but not enough to dislodge an expert who clung for dear-life-and-action. The hard-bodied teacher's shooting power was incredible, yet _still_ within Jerr's league, and no less than ten jets flowed flawlessly through the living suck-machine. An eleventh escaped, but on purpose; Jerr wrenched his throat and lips from the cum-pumping mass for all of two seconds, and raised his grinning face to watch that same eleventh rocket towards the ceiling. In his eyes, the arc was a work of art, and became the means for his proudest 'party trick'; catching the gob right between his teeth, and sliding so rapidly back down the shooter's length, the next-in-line was safely held and taken as the rest.

Though Jerr's restless tail had a mind of its own, from time to time it would still cooperate; such as now, when it came in line to 'finger' his plenty-loose hole, deepening by an inch a second. Cyrus was on shot-number-fifteen, and only _now_ did they start to lessen in the least. Possessing the smaller form of a spidermonkey, Jerr's normally-flat abs were ever-so-slightly distending from the sheer volume he _greedily_ took, which gave him the profile of a subtle pot-belly. Had Hornbill the capacity to open his eyes, he doubtless would've seen how this likened to his own, natural middle-aged spread... But he couldn't, as that _same_ age didn't subtract from his endowment's blessed might, or how it kept him in climactic throes far longer than the average male. Still gobbling down every last drop, Jerr's knowing appreciation burned half-as-deep as his growing lust, nudged on by his cock's edging closer to the goal line... Cyrus wasn't the **only** one brought quickly back to the point of no return, and the over-engorged monkey dick was aching to do its duty.

As Hornbill's peak was gradually dimming, and sensations started to calm, the man-obsessed simian's grew to replace it. Jerr's task-muffled peak-whines and their low frequency sent strong vibrations from lips-to-rhino-meat, gifting Cyrus some unexpected shudders. Meanwhile, the tip of his monkey-pecker drizzled its pent-up load, and even shot a few down Hornbill's calves, as eight toes curled and straightened in the long-awaited release. Instinctively, Jerr tried to glance down and admire how much he'd 'contributed' - his usual, pride-serving endcap - and was reminded that the combo of a massive cock, and overgrown bush, do well at obscuring views.

While his payload was exhausting itself, slowly, wonderfully, he cast attention back on the teacher's needs, still coaxing smaller and smaller ropes from its sensitive slithole. With gaze locked longingly on his fuckbuddy's face, warmed by a satisfied sigh, he at last felt the end of ten-inch pulses, and drew his oral hug away from its heir. He would've stayed on, and milked their 'visit' for all it was worth, if words weren't necessary.

"_\*smack\*_ _Big guy_?" He weakly began, vocal cords impeded by their thorough coating.

Cyrus, and his faculties, took a moment to regain themselves. "_Y_-yes?"

"Two things. First, thanks like _hell_... No matter how far I stray, you _never_ stop bein' the best and hottest. My passin' on your 'proposal', changes _jack shit_."

The rhino legs shifted idly, a reflex to the boost of ego. "_Heh_... Then I appreciate the honest news."

"Don't mention it, beefstick. Second... I may not be the marryin' _kind_, but I **still** want your children. Science can make it happen, just say the word."

A large, reddish eyebrow raised, before Cyrus could decipher it as just another compliment.

"Well, gratitude for the offer." Repaying the jab in the only way he could think of, he took one hand to his giant meat, held it out for Jerr to re-take, and drew it quickly away once the lips came into range.

"_Ohhh_, **ASS** hole. Just for that, you can **_wonder_** about the third."

Hearty, baritone laughs. "No, that makes us even. So go _right_ ahead."

"... Fine, sure, whatever." He paused to readjust his cap, which was inching forward from his newly-concluded movements. "I got a favour to ask. And you know me, I wait for _just_ the right amount of leverage." An ingratiating wink. "Howzabout it?"

Hornbill's eyes rolled like logs down a hillside. "Well I can't exactly say _no_ right now... But that's the meaning of _leverage_, I'm sure."

"_Nice_, now _you're_ learning from **me**." Still in mind to joke with his well-spent company, he laid both elbows on the set of taut thighs, in a comical tween-girl pose. "Tell Will, I'm on my way. I know you have his number, and if he hears _my_ voice I'll be eight hours on and staring at a dead battery before he'd let me go."

"That's _all_ you need from me?" Cyrus felt genuine shock, based simply on their history. "Consider it done." Now passing the last shred of afterglow, he tightened grip on the railings, using them to stand up. Upon reaching this stance, however, he felt a different tickle... Slight breeze, stirred up from his motion, against the clumps of monkey seed clinging to his lower legs' manfuzz.

The pair noticed in unison, and Jerr's mirth grew for many reasons. " **_Heh_** -_heh,_ pearl anklet. Here, lemme take _care_ o' that for you." Dipping knees to the ground, he literally slid up to Hornbill's legs, and licked every last drop from their hairy perch. The teacher couldn't help but laugh, at just how dirty he was willing to go.

Finishing the complimentary spot-clean, Cyrus's fervid fan leaned back, swooped one arm to the ground and snatched his shirt - somehow - from beneath Hornbill's trousers. "But yeah, he needs to know I'm joinin' him, if you'd be _so_ gorgeous-ly kind."

"Not a problem." Following words were muffled, by the motions of bending to fetch his pants. "So, he's prone to talk your ear off over nothing? I wouldn't think him the type."

Jerr's killer smirk was in full glory. "Nah... More like goading me into phone-'sessions'."

The soft clang of a belt being buckled. "Why couldn't I guess."

"Hey, I can't _help_ it if the sound of my pleasure has a fan. Or three. Or thirty."

The self-assured chimp peeked under the stall door, scanning for other shadows. Giving Cyrus the 'all-clear', they quietly stepped out, rhino on point. "Well Jerr, I'll make sure you can leave in one piece, but at this point any more would be a _pipe dream_." His eyes cut slyly to the shorter target. "You and your love affair with attention."

The selfsame target shot back a single guffaw. "Only if that means you changed your name. Enjoyed the time, _among other things_, Mr. Cyrus ' **_Attention_**' Hornbill. And wish me luck, I'm not so sure Will's cut out to do his version of _'Prison Break'_. "

The virile teacher's response was _bathed_ in gratification. "Best of luck, prodigy."

Upon crossing the bathroom's threshold, they did their best to go seperate ways.

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

The school's singular human, walking hands-in-pockets down the quieted hall, was rejoined by his best friend. With chaos dying its natural death, Jake's fun expired as well, so he chose to retake his place alongside Adam. As they moped aimlessly, from finding their classroom auto-bolted, there was still the sporadic pass of a frantic student.... But this was normal, and soon followed by another pupil, higher on the food chain.

The freckle-faced boy sighed for this average, tiresome sight, just before Jake's weak shoulder-jab stole his attention. "Snap out of it, bucko, you're bringin' me even down-er."

Adam's narrow scowl made clear his attitude. "Fine, maybe _now_ you'll get the picture. We got a **reason** to be down, and its name is **detention**."

_"Psh",_ the young primate objected, waving his wrist through the air. "Pretty sure Hornbill never _used_ that word. Way to think the _worst_, padre."

"For the last time, _gringo_..." Lupe took in their looks of surprise, as she fluttered slowly over them. "... Leave the Español to an **expert**."

Her iridescent form lowered to perch on the bill of Jake's hat, a lighthearted punishment. "Sorry I skipped out on you hombrés... Mama asked me to fetch some groceries, and with swimsuit season creeping up, I could use the exercise."

Jake tried his best to convey boredom. "Oh, well you didn't miss all that much. Regular day."

The human face was fittingly stupified, staring down Jake. This lasted for all of two seconds, before their stroll led them by the principal's office... Where they halted at a sound they'd never heard from within.

"Whoa, weird," Adam intoned. "Is that... Pixiefrog _laughing_?"

His ape accomplice shuffled up to the door, and laid one ear against it. "Sure is... I didn't think he knew _how_."

And as Jake continued to eavesdrop, the conversation gradually unfolded.

"... And then I realized, it was _me_ who'd been stealing my tampons the entire time..."

The high-pitched gazellian voice, was displaced by a brief coughing fit. "I was just so sleep-deprived, I didn't even... Er... Um..."

"Remember?" Offered a chuckling mandrill.

"_Yes_, remem... Rem... What you said."

It was an oddly cultural scene, four figures perched flimsily like the swooning nudes on a classical canvas. Horace sat with shoulders draped and arms hanging over the back of Pixiefrog's full-sized chair, their feminine nurse lay sidewise on the floor, head in her elevated hoof, Pixiefrog himself reclined with his weight against a stapler...

...And the school counselor stood back-to-a-bookcase, trying valiantly not to crack up at their lack of 'endurance'.

"_Maurice_?" Shouted the cracking voice of a blazed amphibian, not seeing he was only five feet distant.

"Uh-\*_cchhhm\*_-huh?" He answered, with a sound that was half-holding-smoke, half-choking down his need to bust out laughing.

"Something just... _Occurred_ to me. What if all the money we're budgeted, doesn't really go to the students. I mean, it _does_, but it more goes to _test scores_. The kids can pass them just fine, but that doesn't mean they're _learning_, they're just **recalling**."

"... _Wait_, come again?" The reply fought for vocal dominance, against the sound of Horace fingering the fabric on his chair.

"I think..." He paused, to take the tightly-rolled 'gift' Maurice handed him, "I think the school board is in kahoots with the paper manufacturers. To make sure their product gets pushed here, cheaply. The dirty bastards... _\*inhale\*_... Are paying them off."

This was the end of a mandrill's self-control, and hearty, gut-busting guffaws ensued. By the time 'Mary Jane' came back around, he'd just barely regained composure.

"... _Oh_ my **_God_** ," the gazelle suddenly protested, "It just occurred to me, I haven't shaved my legs in _TWO WEEKS!_ "

"But Nurse," Pixiefrog slurred, focusing on her nubile gams through tiny, bloodshot eyes, "You _never_ shave your legs."

Her _own_ pair of red-tinted whites grew in further dismay, while Horace's weight tipped the chair over to limply sprawl him across the floor. "... And that's why I'm _always_ **_alone!!_**"

The joint made its way to an upside-down ferret, and Maurice's palm met his face, as the high-pitched sobbing began. "This was short-sighted, on my part. Half our little bevy are hopeless, unbridled lightweights."

"Oh, cut her some slack, _chum_," the principal whispered through his cartoonish grin, "It's probably just her _lady hormones_. Dear old mom was the same way." His voice found its normal strength. "Now now, nurse, you're _plenty_ attractive. And besides, it's the time to relax, nothing in the **_world_** to fret over."

She seemed confused, behind the hankerchief that wiped her tears. "Not even that boy, or _whatever_ it was, that's running around?"

Three faces changed in a split second, and all three to natural alarm, but it was Horace and his topsy-turvy features that shot widest.

Meanwhile, Jake was nothing but puzzled, at the things his ear picked up.

"_So_, what's going **on** in there?", came Adam's fists-on-hips impatience, with the lovely toucan a dead-on match.

"Well, I'll put it this way..." Jake returned. "... Haven't got a _clue_."

There was an exasperated human sigh, just before monkey ears seemed to quiver, and his tail gave a twitch. "Wait a sec... Got some major noise, here."

It somewhat soothed Adam's chagrin. "What kind of noise?"

"I dunno, like feet or something, on a hard floor-"

Jake's pause, was only due to him flying across the room, rolling to a stop against the wall; Adam jumped back in an oddly-femmy cringe, and Lupe turned a full midair-somersault. The office door had crashed down before them, sending cracks through the tempered glass, with someone atop its now-horizontal plane... The vice-coach ferret, ever silent and barely aware of his position, still clutching nature's bounty between two fingers.

His head swiveled lazily to meet Adam, who was shifting from startled fear to incredible curiosity. And over the span of moments, while Lupe hovered down next to them, and Jake shuffled up rubbing his elbow, his thoughts coagulated. "Is that... A cigarette?"

"'Fraid not, pink boy."

Adam's head swung to the left, taking in a barely-familiar sight. Floating on the thoughts of his 'accomplished' day, Jake's effectual mentor flashed a simple, 'wassup' head-bob; and from the lack of any jolt, even his brother could tell he had the situation well-figured out.

"So Maurice is still the _same_ kanivin' wordsmith, I see... I wouldn't move this silent sap, until he's 'here' enough to move himself. Respect the spine, you dig?"

All the while, the shrinking joint in a ferret's hand was drooping further, slipping from a weakened hold. Half-from his activities, half-from the thundrous impact, Horace looked somewhere beyond the four digits, that swooped in to save it... By snatching it away.

"_Puff_, _puff_, **_pass_** , fuckface."

Jerr helped himself to a deep, full toke, before launching into full-blown hacking mode. His only sibling, put on a first-class frown. "See, it's poison, like dad always said."

The elder monkey somehow chuckled through the choke. "_This_ shit is... Tastes like pig-ass shipped in from _Love Canal_. Mandrill's standards are slippin' somethin' **fierce**." For his own amusement, he slid the spliff between Horace's lips, before leaning up to fake-out-punch Jake's shoulder, and watch him recoil. "I'm outta here, caught wind there's trouble in paradise and it _won't_ go so well without me. Catch ya later, assclown. Adam, nice shootin' the breeze with you. Toucan chick, try some color-protect shampoo."

With Lupe quickly fluttering away in gasp-laden sobs, Adam became the next on a long list of eye-wideners. "_Whoa_, after all the damage you've caused, and with Vice-Coach Ferret lying right here in front of us, you're just gonna _leave_?"

Jerr's arms found their way to a masculine cross. "That's the idea."

By now, Jake was staring down his best buddy, eager to see just how he'd explode _this_ time. While waiting for the trembling lips, or the barrage of boy-swears that always glided between them...

... Human countenance promptly brightened. "That's the _coolest_ thing I've heard in a **long** time. I can see why Jake looks _up_ to you so much!"

Jerr had a few foul snickers, while Adam's peripheral caught the look of a pal whose mortified embarrassment was nothing short of marvelous.

In the eldest's mind, now would be choice for a timely exit. "On that note, see you pimpin'. And keep my bro in line, or at least off the FBI's ten most wanted."

Through Adam's point of view, a self-satisfied simian spun on his heel, and skipped away, in a style that _somehow_ was totally non-effiminate... And also brought liberal sloshing from his stomach area. While Jake glared with daggers in the eyes - no doubt for the total shaming - Jerr's form vanished at the apex of a corner wall.

... Then came the squeaking sounds of moisture on tile, as Virgil breezed by the starstruck pair. "_Waaiit_, you never gave me your _number!!_ C'mon, I'm **_free_** this weekend, there's a great little café down the street, right next to the Bally's..." The sentence faded out, as he, too, rounded the same point.

"Jake?"

The reciprocating tone, was harsh. "_What_."

"He _is_ one-of-a-kind. And maybe someday, you'll **_be_** like him."

The thought alone, in two shakes of a monkey's tail, turned Jake's ill will on its head. Gazing a millions miles away, he was wholly-enthralled by this prospect. " **_HECK_** yes! I can see it now, written in lights... Jake Spidermonkey the first, _supreme woof!"_

His 'royal' tone, crumbled on Adam's reaction. "_Woof?"_

"Yeah, well... Yeah. In _his_ words," Jake forged his best brotherly impression, "'masculine dude, who lives for _other_ masculine dudes.'"

"Oh..." Adam tried the arduous task of focusing on his pal's 'manly' pose, without giggling... He didn't succeed. "You got a _loooong_ way to go."

Between the well-deserved belly laughs and irked incredulity, they'd missed Pixiefrog's miniature build, leaning out the open office threshold.

"_Just a moment_, you two. Isn't it past time for second period?"

Adam, in a slight sweat, gazed up at a nearby wall clock. "Y-yes sir, by forty-six-and-a-quarter minutes."

Another half-a-minute tacked on to that, as Pixiefrog stood there, cogs turning slowly in his head.

"Well go sit by your next class, while I figure out who called for this lockdown. Looks like I'll be suspending someone for negligence today... Doing such a thing without... Without... Uh..."

"Cause?", Adam interjected.

"Right, what _you_ said."

As their frog czar leaned back into his office, Jake and his human pal's thoughts had a rare synchronization. Wondering - among other things - how he could miss a broken door, with a faculty casualty on top, six inches in front of him. Their mutual conclusion: it was best not to ask questions.

\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*

Three detestable things flanked the silverbacked silhouette - clad in standard-issue fatigues - on all sides: blistering heat, bivouac tents, and benumbing apathy. Small comfort in his regret-filled mind, was the notion he sat playing out a decades-old cliche; ass on a barrel, facing a giant mound of peeled nourishment, a knife in one hand and the next tasty victim in the other. It was hard to say what he missed more; the company of his classmates, or close to everything else he knew from home.

It didn't help matters, he was positioned at the foot of the loudspeaker. Lunch bell sounded, Windsor Gorilla was deaf for three minutes. The random, barking announcements, might jack that number up to ten or fifteen. It hardly mattered, anyway... It's not like he was getting off that seat. Not with **_his_** track record, of spouting thoughtful dissertations on the nature of every military exercise, he'd repeatedly fail for that very reason.

Now, it started up again... And for the first time, through some instinct of self-preservation, his mud-and-greased face gazed up at the cold steel speaker, and attempted to make out its garbled message.

"_NOW HEAR THIS, MAGGOTS, WILL ONE **PRIVATE REGINALD B. FLYING SQUIRREL** REPORT TO THE P.T.L. TENT ON THE DOUB- **HGKFGHFHFHF** _..."

The solid gorilla brow furrowed at new and foreign noise. "This is certainly curious" he mused, "Never generated _quite_ that ilk of static, in bygone repetitions..."

His ponder came to a screeching halt, as the same speaker began blasting out a full-volume playback of DJ Gammer's "Can't Complete".

Once his shattered nerves finished their struggle to jam a finger in each ear, his reflex-squinting abated. _One_ portion of his training that sunk in, was heightened awareness, which allowed him to glimpse what now stood twenty feet to his right. Also a gorilla, in faded football jersey and blue jean cutoffs. Leaning on a reinforced tentpole, shooting a smile his direction, whilst one-handed-juggling a transistor and a Swiss Army Knife.

Windsor's pysche crashed on pure distress. "W-Will?"

"None other, my ill-advised fish out of water. Consider your ship, arrived."

**To Be ... Continued?**

Source: https://sofurry.com/s/GnDBDVpe


