{"sf1_id":537059,"sf2_id":"rn6b4Xzn","title":"Finding My Purpose","author":"Riverweasel","words":710,"posted_at":"2013-05-10T21:00:00.000Z","tags":["Friendship","Other","Poem"],"url":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/537059-finding-my-purpose","original_url":"https://sofurry.com/s/rn6b4Xzn","image_url":"https://cdn.sofurryfiles.com/submissions/thumbnails/0a/5f/0a5f1f3d-58ea-46ae-b6de-787616bf9be0","description":"#13 of Poems\n\nYou know who you are and this is just my way of responding back to what you wrote to me last night.","content":"I believe that I may have to be concise and clear\n\nYet at the same time there is an underlying fear\n\nThat what needs to be said might be a bit brash\n\nAnd so I will take my time to fully explain it\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nThree years and some change previous to this day\n\nI found someone on Facebook in a game we played\n\nWe both found each other to be cunning and clever\n\nBut I soon saw more than his general comments\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nI no longer remember what it was that caught my eye\n\nWhat it was I found in him that I felt connected by\n\nMaybe his pain, his estrangement, his defensive nature\n\nPerhaps his bipolar nature, that said I reached out\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nThere has never been a day since that I regret that move\n\nThe hand that I stretched out to his so I could soothe\n\nHis weary soul and aching heart and broken mind\n\nI had helped others, but soon I found he helped me\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nHe still oft denies it even as this morning's sun rises\n\nBut the truth stands solid throughout many a crisis\n\nFor as I grew up I had learned that trusting another\n\nWas a game that you were destined to lose\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nI have told him things I have never shared with my sisters\n\nHe knows of the scars I hide from my parents and all the blisters\n\nI accrued through my childhood for I tell him all of it\n\nA freedom from the secrecy that has long bound my soul\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nThe You who knows what I had never shared before\n\nKnow that you are still the only one who's seen the open door\n\nSeen my cluttered room, the man behind the façade\n\nThat I keep in order to appear healthy and calm\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nYou and I share a passion, the desire to help others\n\nTo unbury those that lost their will to uncover\n\nTheir desires and dreams and exuberant flames\n\nBut that passion of mine cannot be held captive\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nYou were the first I reached out to, but there are others in pain\n\nAnd it would be selfish of me to let only you in from the rain\n\nIt would be ugly of us to separate us from them\n\nAnd ugly is what I refuse to be\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nI love you more than words can express, we both know this\n\nWe are not mates, friends, brothers, any title would miss\n\nWhat it is we share and the strength of the bond that we have\n\nI want you by my side, I always will\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nBut while we walk along this path of life on a trail\n\nI would feel sick to not gather others to prevail\n\nFor so long as there are those that are hurting\n\nMy mission can never be complete\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nYou are my closest companion, the very essence of the word friend\n\nBut we both have to realize the truth, realize we can't pretend\n\nI would sacrifice my life for you and I know you would the same\n\nBut my heart yearns to have others that I might do the same for them\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nPlease do not be jealous, please try to understand my purpose\n\nI found you and I have pulled and struggled and finally the dirt has loosened\n\nYou have started to crawl out, to make progress back\n\nSo do not hate me when I lessen my hold upon you to grab another that is sinking\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nFor all of us hurt and all of us feel pain and I ache to help them all\n\nIf it was up to me and I could make the decision, then not a one of you would fall\n\nBut both the hurting and I have a limited supply of time\n\nAnd so I must help those that need it the most\n\n\u0026nbsp;\n\nYou have come a long way from the young man I knew three years past\n\nAnd at the same time, you have done more for me than I could have asked\n\nIn a short time we'll have each other to hug and to enjoy shenanigans with\n\nLet us enjoy the time we have with each other\n\nRather than complain about the time that we don't.\n\n  \n  \n\n","series":{"name":"Poems","previous":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/536500-feline-seduction.json","next":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/555125-ignorance.json"}}