{"sf1_id":564466,"sf2_id":"V1Y4pZ2n","title":"Deal II","author":"Furry Human","words":243,"posted_at":"2013-07-17T22:48:00.000Z","tags":["Other","Spiritual Recovery"],"url":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/564466-deal-ii","original_url":"https://sofurry.com/s/V1Y4pZ2n","image_url":"https://www.sofurryfiles.com/std/thumb?page=564466\u0026ext=.jpg","description":"","content":"I thought summer camp at \"Parent Camp\" would set me free,\n\nI thought returning a little to the 1950's would show me how my parents wished I would be,\n\nhow this world should be,\n\nthis culture has me down,\n\nso down,\n\nso down, so down,\n\nso I thought Depeche Mode, and Care Bears could save my soul, together, in '91, with\n\n\"The Labyrinth\", too,\n\nyou know what to do,\n\nbut even a drug-centered fool like me knows his limits,\n\nwhen too much\n\ncould end a life,\n\nand I don't want to die.\n\nI still want to express myself.\n\nI still believe in the New Age.\n\nI still believe there is Someone who can Save me from Myself,\n\nfrom Jesus,\n\nthat Ancient Enemy,\n\nthat Deceiver of Life,\n\nwho cares about Himself more than my own temporal wishes.\n\nWhat is going on here?\n\nShaking the bars,\n\nstuck in the chandelier of frozen feelings,\n\nstripped of my natural emotions, and desires, and feelings,\n\n\"Fuck you, motherfucker!, Fuck you!\"\n\nI cry,\" as I hang on,\n\nBut for what?\n\nI might as well fall,\n\nfor my hope is in vain,\n\nand as I fall,\n\nJesus catches me, and places me in chains,\n\nand I am His,\n\nand He whips me, screaming \"Crawl, motherfucker, crawl, you are my slave for eternity, along with those who wanted to be here!\" along with the other pious, ivory creeps.\n\nWhy bother to have lived?\n\nI never had a chance to \"sin\" anyways?\n\n  \n  \n\n"}