{"sf1_id":585760,"sf2_id":"B1QO9yEm","title":"Xandar Biax - Origins","author":"Xandar0827","words":1488,"posted_at":"2013-09-05T01:51:00.000Z","tags":["Adolescent","Akita","Alcohol","Bear","Bittersweet","Cheetah","Coming Out","Depression","Drunk","Gay","Gay Relationships","M/M","Male","Real Life","Realistic"],"url":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/585760-xandar-biax-origins","original_url":"https://sofurry.com/s/B1QO9yEm","image_url":"https://cdn.sofurryfiles.com/submissions/thumbnails/b4/4a/b44ac06b-f7ac-4c72-8d41-abc9d97745b5","description":"Not really a story. It is more of a background of my fursona. It isn't vivid, detailed, or very creative, just some previous memories of mine. Good feedback or bad, I just felt as if I had to put this out there.","content":"When he was but a young pup, around the age of 2, his mother left him on the back porch ofhis grandparents house and she   \nwasn't seen again for a very long time. His dad was a great man and a constant provider and raised 2 young children alone,  \nwhile moving around the United States due to his Air Force commitments. His father was and always will be there for him.  \nHis father remarried a wonderful womean who came with open arms and loved Xandar and his sister like they were her own.  \nShe came with he own demons though.\n\nHe didn't realize he was \"different\" until around Jr. High school (7th grade to be specific). He was on the football team  \nIt was the first time that communittee showers were used and the first time that he saw another guy naked (and Xandar  \nenjoyed it). He had played many other various sports throughout his childhood, but football was the only one to stick. It was that he enjoyed playing  \nthe game, but more or less to take advantage of the workout plan and, of course, the showers. He played football and was a  \nplace kicker until he graduated in 2011. He has several friends from the football team that he would hang out and play video  \ngames with constantly. He never partied or even stayed out past 10pm for fear of what his dad would do to him.\n\nNow comes the next level in his life, College. This was the first time that he was off on his own, and he was very nervous  \nand still didn't accept who he really was, which brings up the darkest part of his life, when he was suicidal. He was suicidal  \nbecause he knew he was different and, in the state where he was born and raised, being gay was heavily frowned upon and   \nwas under constant scrutinay.He arrived at college still not knowing what he was going to do with his life. He had no major  \nin mind, wasn't happy with who he was, and he had very little but very faithful friends. Xandar was always a follower and   \ntherefore he followed a few of his good friends to college and they lived together their first year. Xandar finally hit rock  \nbottom when he sat in his room for hours, he didnt go to class, didn't hang out with anyone, and he just thought about all of  \nthe things that he wasn't happy with and he decided that the world would be better without him. He gave college one more day  \nto try and prove him wrong, this is where his Fraternity comes into play.\n\nHis best friend from high school, Teage the rather large Brown Bear, convinced   \nhim to come hang out with some of these \"Frat\" guys, and Xander grew up watching and hearing all these stories about wild  \nparties and non stop hazing so he was relucktant, but eventually caved. He was glad that he did. He was greeted with open and   \nwarm handshakes. This was the first instance in his life where everyone knew who he was before he even got there. It just felt  \nlike home and it was the best thing for Xandar, it pulled him out of his slump. Fastforeward a few weeks, it is Xandars Birthday  \nAugust 27th, and it was the first Fraternity party of the semester. Teage thought it would be cool to go around telling all of  \nthe Fraternity brothers that it was indeed xandars birthday. I got taken upstairs where 10 shots of random liquor was poured  \non the kitchen table. This is his first expierience with alcohol and it all went surprisingly well for his first time, other   \nthat the fact that he wasn't used to trying to walk while intoxicated so he clumsily stumbled trying to go to the bathrooms.  \nThis was turning out to be the best time of his life. He got a bid to pledge this Fraternity and he gladly accepted while his   \ntail couldnt stop wagging. Now, he doesn't really like to talk about or descirbe his pledge ship, but he does say constantly  \nthat it was the best experience and he wouldnt give it back for the world. He got initiated into a lifelong brotherhood of people  \nthat he knew would love him no matter what happened. That very same night, he got a little too drunk, but it was just drunk   \nenough to talk about his deepest secrets. Xandar revealed himself to be gay the night after he got initiated becuase he was afraid  \nthat if he came out of the closet while he was a pledge, that he would not get a fair chance to be initiated. No one believed  \nXandar when he first came out, most say you are just saying this because you are too drunk, or just complete denail \"There is no  \nway you are gay, you are too cool.\" But he persisted on and people believed him and no one resented him or hated him, which was the  \ncomplete opposite reaction that he thought he would get.\n\nXandar has a big brother in the Fraternity, Jeff which was one hell of an artic fox, who Xandar didn't know at the time was a bisexual, and it turns out  \nthat he has quite the track record of people he had slept with. He and his big brother decided to have  \na \"lets get smashed night\" since Jeff missed his initiation night. Jeff showed up with 3 handles of rum and the both of them  \nfinished all three bottles throughout the night. Xandar blacked out before going to sleep and woke up in Jeff's bed, both of them  \nwere naked. Xandar quietly freaked out to himself because he had never blacked out before, he didn't know if they had sex or even  \njust fooled around, there was no sign of a condom anywhere either. He was afraid and worried, but he kept it to himself until Jeff  \nwoke up. They talked it out and they indeed had sex the previous night. This upset Xandar because he had just lost his virginity  \nand he doesnt even remember it, Jeff reassures him that he did fine and it was all incredibly fun. This made Xandars tail wag out  \nof control again. Jeff got up and beacond him to the shower with him where the both of them proceeded to have hot, steamy sex in the shower,  \nand this time, Xandar remembers it. They both said that no brothers can know about the two of them because they told the Fraternity  \nthat it wouldnt happen. Xandar, being young and dumb and constantly drinking, kept pushing the limits of the secret by trying to make  \nout with Jeff in front of everyone else. He finally calmed down and started looking else where for a boyfriend or mate.\n\nThis is where his first boyfriend, and ex boyfriend, Taeylor comes into the picture. Taeylor is a sweet cheetah who was slim and stood around 5'10, and he first met at a dorm party. Xandar couldnt help but just awkardly stare at this random guy that he met for the first time; it was love at first sight for him.  \nBut he didnt know how Taeylor felt or if he was even gay. This kid was too pretty to be straight but the longer the two of them hung  \nout and talked with other people in the room, it seemed as if he wasnt gay or even interested. But one drunken night which involed,  \na long text message confession about how Xandar really feels about Taeylor was sent out and read, changed everything. Taeylor  \nresponded after a days long wait and said that he would love to try and asked how he knew that he was gay, and Xandar just giggled, tail   \nwagging uncontrollably again, and said that the gay-dar is built in and finely tuned. They dated for 11months, and only the first 3 of  \nthose month were enjoyable. Taeylor just one day became extremely jealous, bitter, and controlling for no reason.  \nHe didnt believe anything that Xandar told him and Taeylor began to try and manipulate Xandar's feelings to keep him from  \nhis brothers that he loves so dearly, and he mentally abused him by constantly be littling Xandar and making him feel like he wasn't a human being.  \nIt took Xandar breaking up with him 4 times before Taeylor would really accept the fact that Xandar was ready to move on from him.  \nDating Taeylor taught Xandar some valuable life lessons and also compeltely ruined him about dating anyone.\n\nThis is just something that I came up with after being sick and little to no sleep at work at 2:30AM. Please let me know  \nwhat you guys think. It might be un-readable in certain parts, but I am not claiming to be a writer by any sense of the word.\n\n  \n  \n\n"}