{"sf1_id":689534,"sf2_id":"JewkbqJe","title":"That Was Not A Question","author":"ShingetsuMoon","words":491,"posted_at":"2014-04-06T18:51:00.000Z","tags":["Poem","Poetry"],"url":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/689534-that-was-not-a-question","original_url":"https://sofurry.com/s/JewkbqJe","image_url":"https://cdn.sofurryfiles.com/submissions/thumbnails/79/9d/799de190-e980-4263-97cb-13c21dd24e00","description":"#3 of National Poetry Writing Month\n\nAnother poem written for National Poetry Month.","content":"* * *\n\nNO.\n\nThat was not a question, but I bet  \none came to mind for many of you.  \nWhat was that about?  \nWhat was that for?  \nWhere is this going?\n\nFor some of you I'm sure a question is  \nthe first thing that came to mind so let  \nme ask you this...when did no become  \na question?\n\nWhen did it cease to be a statement  \nand instead become an excuse?  \nWhen did it become the beginning of  \na conversation instead of the end?\n\nWhen did we transform it into an  \nopening for interrogation instead of   \naccepting it as a way for a person  \nto assert their right of refusal?\n\nWhen did we stop listening to  \nwhat our friends had to say?\n\nWhen a person says no that  \nshould be the end not the  \nbeginning. Not an opening.  \nNot an excuse to pressure them  \nto come up with words until  \na reason that you view as acceptable  \nspills forth from their lips.\n\nThere is a difference between asking  \nand forcing and when you continually  \nforce someone to try and do something  \nafter they have already told you no  \nthen you have lost all rights to their  \npoliteness.\n\nIf you have ignored their reasons and  \npushed aside their feelings again and  \nagain and again in order to get them  \nto do something they are not comfortable  \nwith then they do not have to be nice.\n\nThey do not have to be polite.  \nThey do not have to be kind.  \nThey do not have to soften their words  \nfor you after you have stabbed them with  \nyours.\n\nNo is not a question.  \nIt is a statement.  \nIt is a declaration.  \nIt is a shout.\n\n\u0026nbsp;It is a scream from the person  \nwho can only manage to squeak out  \na reluctant, \"maybe next time.\"\n\n\"No, I'm not interested\" does not mean  \n\"I just want you to try harder.\"\n\n\"No I don't feel like going\" does not  \nmean \"keep trying, it's not like I have  \nanything better to do.\"\n\nYou do not get to question a person  \nwithout their consent and then lash out  \nwhen they snap back and refuse to give their  \nanswers to you.\n\nThey told you no.  \nThey told you to stop.  \nThey told you they weren't comfortable.  \nThey told you they were in pain.  \nThey told you they weren't interested.  \nThey told you they didn't want to.\n\nDon't blame them because you weren't  \nlistening hard enough. Don't blame them  \nfor getting angry when you were the one who  \nrefused to accept their reasons. Don't put  \nthem down because of your failure to realize  \nthat other people have feelings and opinions too  \nand sometimes they just aren't the same as yours.\n\nDo not blame the world around you because  \nof your inability to accept a refusal.\n\nNo is a statement not a question and you  \ndon't get to ask them for an answer if they  \nare not willing to volunteer it.\n\n  \n  \n\n","series":{"name":"National Poetry Writing Month","previous":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/689530-have-you-ever-stopped-to-listen.json","next":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/689536-edge-of-eternity.json"}}