{"sf1_id":951570,"sf2_id":"J1ODK2ge","title":"Lies and Dreams","author":"Edmerica","words":2247,"posted_at":"2016-01-04T21:14:00.000Z","tags":["Dream","Fox","Human","Love","M/F","Soulmates","Vixen"],"url":"https://fse.anthro.fr/stories/951570-lies-and-dreams","original_url":"https://sofurry.com/s/J1ODK2ge","image_url":"https://cdn.sofurryfiles.com/submissions/thumbnails/fc/b9/fcb97a7d-48bb-4dff-97cb-c79ea063d93a","description":"Quick story, first upload, oneshot, enjoy.","content":"Her soft paws drew slowly down my bare chest...\n\nThe red fur tickling me as she rode on...\n\nI could see her smile, as she blushed with our shared passions...\n\nHer eyes half lidded in lust and intense amounts of love...\n\nLove that I gave back...\n\nLove that seemed to join our souls together in this moment of passion....\n\nI could hear her...\n\nHer short, strong gasps of air...\n\nHer breathless words that I could hear forever without tiring...\n\nHow I wished to reciprocate such words, and did without hesitation...\n\nOh, how we danced, me and my love...\n\nMy vixen...\n\nMy other half...\n\nMy soul...\n\n...\n\nMy lie...\n\n////////////////////////////////////\n\nIt always ends the same...\n\nThe dream, as I go to sleep every night as I have for the past nine years...\n\nI find myself in that dream...\n\n...\n\nI start with opening a door that I do not recognize...\n\nI find her in the kitchen...\n\nOr the living room...\n\nOr the study...\n\nOr even the bed room...\n\nEach time the meeting is a little different...\n\nYet, each time she is always ecstatic to see me...\n\nLike she had known me forever...\n\nWe greet with a hug and a passionate kiss...\n\nSometimes we talk, though I never remember about what...\n\nI simply remember the sound of her voice...\n\nHer soft, melodic, beautiful voice...\n\nWe sit together, my vixen and I, her tail wrapped around my waist...\n\nMy arm over her back...\n\nOur teasing of each other starts innocently...\n\nWorking over each other’s bodies...\n\nLearning each other all over again...\n\nAnd each time we eventually break down and allow our carnal desires drive us to its inevitable conclusion...\n\nAnd, just as we expend ourselves...\n\nI awaken...\n\nAwaken to a world without her...\n\nA world where I am alone...\n\nAnd each time, a small piece of my soul is left behind...\n\nWith her...\n\n//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////\n\nWhen it began, I was afraid...\n\nFearful of this creation my mind conjured...\n\nOf what it could mean...\n\nI was so narrow minded then...\n\nI believed that such relationships, with a creature that held the features of an animal...\n\nWere wrong...\n\n...\n\nBut no...\n\nI was wrong...\n\nSo very, very wrong...\n\nBut I remained afraid, not only of her, but how I felt around her...\n\nBecause I felt no fear when I was there with her...\n\nOnly love...\n\nLove so vast I could drown in it...\n\nIt nearly drove me mad...\n\nAnd I nearly had myself committed...\n\nWere it not for the night that changed everything...\n\n...\n\nThat night, when I entered that nameless place of meeting, I managed to speak...\n\nTo her...\n\nAnd the first thing I asked of her...\n\nWas not who are you, or what are you, or even where am I...\n\nBut why...\n\nWhy did she love me so...\n\nHer answer shocked me...\n\nShe loved me...\n\nBecause I simply completed her...\n\nI made her whole...\n\nI was her reason to laugh, to cry, to get up each morning, and go to sleep each night...\n\nWithout me there...\n\nShe would have broken long ago...\n\n...\n\nWhen I awoke, I pondered her words...\n\nHarder and longer than anything I had before...\n\nIn the end however...\n\nThe only answer that shone out to me was...\n\nThat she loved me...\n\nFor me...\n\nFor who I was...\n\nNot my body...\n\nOr my mind...\n\nBut for my everything...\n\nFor my soul...\n\n...\n\nThis is what broke the chains that bound my reservations and fear to me...\n\nIn all my life, I had people say they loved me...\n\nBut there were always strings...\n\nChains...\n\nWeights that was attached to the love...\n\nMoney, sex, position, prestige...\n\nThese chains bound them to me...\n\nAnd eventually were what caused my previous relationships to die...\n\nShe, though, she just loved me because I was there, because I was me, and no one else, and that I loved her in return...\n\n...\n\nThis revelation broke the cage that shackled my soul and upon my realization of it I could not help but crow with joy...\n\nI remember dancing, and laughing at nothing...\n\nI remember running through knee deep snow that had accumulated on my lawn in naught but my robe and slippers...\n\nI was light as a feather, as free as the stars in the sky...\n\nShe loved me, because I was simply what she loved! WHO she loved and the matters of race or species meant nothing...\n\nHow long had I wished to the heavens for such a thing...\n\nThat moment, made her the most beautiful creature on the face of the universe to me...\n\nAny fear of the strangeness of it all was gone...\n\nAnd in its place...\n\nOnly unyielding love...\n\n/////////////////////////////////////////////\n\nNow...\n\nNow my soul and heart breaks for another reason...\n\nIt is because it is a lie...\n\nA god damn LIE...\n\nNone of it is real...\n\nShe isn’t real...\n\nNot here...\n\nOr anywhere outside my dreams...\n\n...\n\nI cannot stand to be away...\n\nEven for the briefest of moments, from her...\n\nThe pain of my heart when it realizes it has again and again been torn from its other half...\n\nIs excruciating...\n\nAnd nearly too much to bear...\n\nBut bear it I will...\n\nNot for me...\n\nNot for myself...\n\n\u0026nbsp;But for her...\n\nAs now I fear...\n\nThat if I cowardly end my own pain...\n\nI will leave her to an even greater agony...\n\nOf living on...\n\nWithout me...\n\n...\n\nAn unacceptable thing...\n\nSo I endure...\n\nAnd hang on to any shreds of hope I can find...\n\nHoping for an answer that may never come...\n\n...\n\nI hope...\n\n////////////////////////////////////////////////////\n\nEureka...\n\nEUREKA...\n\nYes...\n\nA shred...\n\nNay a piece...\n\nNot a full answer but perhaps a key to that unyielding door...\n\nMy dreams...\n\nWith her...\n\nAre not actually DREAMS...\n\nHow do I know this...\n\nBecause we have sex...\n\n...\n\nI see I may have lost you...\n\nMy dream...\n\nAlways ends when we finish sating each other’s passions...\n\nWere it all JUST a dream...\n\nEvidence of such a thing would abound...\n\nBut NO...\n\nInstead, I wake each time in the same position I laid to rest in...\n\nNo tossed pillows...\n\nNo ruffled comforter...\n\nNO soiled sheets...\n\nNothing...\n\n...\n\nIf it really were all in my head, then my wet dream would have spilled over into the waking world at least a few times...\n\nEspecially the times she and I had gotten more adventurous with each other...\n\nBut no, nothing, no evidence of any tricks of the mind commonly associated with such things...\n\nIt is proof of one thing...\n\nMy mind...\n\nAnd perhaps my entire body...\n\nAre not present in the waking world when I am with her...\n\nNow to test the theory...\n\nI will record myself...\n\nAnd see if I vanish into the night...\n\n////////////////////////////////////////\n\nEven with failure, my answer is given...\n\nThe recording I made failed...\n\nAnd yet it succeeded...\n\nIt gave the answer...\n\nI hope...\n\n...\n\nMy body remains...\n\nIt doesn’t move...\n\nBut I can still see the transition...\n\nIt is subtle...\n\nAlmost too subtle...\n\nAnd yet it is there...\n\nIt is in my motion...\n\nOr lack thereof when I enter her world...\n\nTo put it simply when my body goes to sleep...\n\nAll the little motions associated with REM sleep are nonexistent...\n\nNo eye movement, no micro muscle twitches...\n\nMy body seems to just stop in time...\n\nAnd only resumes motion when I awake in the morning...\n\n...\n\nIt answers so many questions...\n\nAnd raises so many more...\n\n...\n\nI need medical equipment...\n\nBrainwave recording devices...\n\nThis will cost me...\n\nBut no price is too high...\n\nI must succeed...\n\nFor both of us...\n\nFor our future...\n\nIn the words of Joseph Stalin: “Not one step backwards.”...\n\n///////////////////////////////////////////////////\n\nTwo years...\n\nTwo years of waiting and saving every penny...\n\nI have acquired the machines...\n\nAnd I know how to operate them...\n\nThe internet is a wonderful thing...\n\n...\n\nI am ready...\n\nNow I will know...\n\n...\n\nThe results were better than I hoped...\n\nThis dream is not a lie...\n\nWhen I awoke to see the results...\n\nThe answer it gave shocked me...\n\nMy brainwaves, the very thing that should never stop...\n\nFlatlined...\n\nFor the entire duration...\n\nAt first I thought I had disconnected a wire...\n\nBut no...\n\nWhen I checked the camera...\n\nI never moved...\n\nJust like before...\n\nAnd what’s more...\n\nThe neural patterns stopped...\n\nAt the exact same time I entered that dream...\n\nThe timestamps on the machine and camera confirm that...\n\n...\n\nIt means only one thing...\n\n...\n\nMy mind is no longer present within my body once the dream starts...\n\nThis being said...\n\nI must find a way for this to help me...\n\nI need an expert...\n\n...\n\nI know where to look...\n\n////////////////////////////////////////////\n\nFriend...\n\nI have had a few over the years...\n\nNow I call upon one of my last...\n\nA doctor...\n\nAnd a confidant...\n\nHe will help...\n\n...\n\nWhen I showed him my results, he was skeptical...\n\nHe could not believe the results were real...\n\nBut I insisted...\n\nHe tested me himself...\n\n...\n\nAnd when I awoke...\n\nHe was amazed...\n\n...\n\nHe said that he thought I had passed on...\n\nBut any attempts at resuscitation failed...\n\nHe thought me dead...\n\nUntil I had woken a few hours later...\n\n...\n\nI told you so would have been cruel at this point...\n\n...\n\nSo, with great hesitation...\n\n...\n\nI told him my story...\n\n...\n\nOnce again his skepticism raised its ugly head...\n\nYet this time the evidence crushed it before it could fully manifest...\n\nNow he is worried...\n\nHe has many experimental leads...\n\nBut no solid answers...\n\nI would be lying if I was not a little disappointed...\n\nBut I must press on...\n\nHe gave me a list...\n\nPlaces that had these experiments...\n\nHe saw my desperation...\n\nHe knew he could never drive me from this...\n\nI must succeed...\n\nFor her...\n\nHe wished the best...\n\nAnd gave me luck...\n\nI thanked him...\n\nAnd told him...\n\nGoodbye...\n\n////////////////////////////////////////\n\nOne after the other...\n\nThey failed...\n\nDrug therapies...\n\nMental exercises...\n\nRitualistic séances...\n\n...\n\nAll failed...\n\nNow I have but one more...\n\nOne more trial...\n\nThis has to work...\n\nIt has to...\n\nI cannot fail...\n\n...\n\nI will not fail...\n\n...\n\nThe machine cost me greatly...\n\nBut it was worth it...\n\nIt was invented by some dream scientist...\n\nA man who wished to control dreams themselves...\n\nA madman...\n\nOr a genius...\n\nEither way...\n\nHe gave me the machine...\n\n...\n\nAn odd device...\n\nMeant to bridge the gap between wake and sleep...\n\nIt works in tandem with my neural patterning device...\n\nIt triggers a specified electrical charge...\n\nThat matches with the moment I enter the dream...\n\nThe purpose is to supercharge the transmission to every cell...\n\nSending my body to the dream along with my mind...\n\n...\n\nPlease god...\n\nLet this work...\n\n/////////////////////////////////////////////\n\n...\n\n...\n\nI awoke more slowly than before...\n\n...\n\nMy mind gathering itself...\n\nI remember the night with her...\n\nWhen I entered...\n\nEverything seemed so vivid...\n\nLike I was seeing it for the first time...\n\nYet our ritual was the same...\n\nBut at the same time so different...\n\nIt felt new somehow...\n\nBetter...\n\n...\n\nBut I have awoken...\n\nAnd I failed...\n\nI look at the window...\n\nThe late spring sun shining in through the curtains...\n\nAnd it all feels so empty...\n\nI lie there for what seems an hour...\n\nContemplating what went wrong...\n\n...\n\nI shift slightly...\n\nAnd at that moment...\n\n...\n\nI FROZE...\n\n...\n\nA weight...\n\nNot of my own weighs down upon my right side...\n\nA weight that tickles as I shift...\n\nWith the speed of a glacier I move my left arm to lift the comforter...\n\nEver so slightly...\n\n...\n\nTo see a crimson furred triangular fox ear peek out at me...\n\nIn a flash I practically tear the comforter and sheets away to reveal...\n\nMY VIXEN...\n\n...\n\n...\n\nMy utter elation must have scared her so...\n\nTo suddenly be ripped from slumber by a scream of joyful whoops...\n\nAnd spun around the room like a ragdoll...\n\nBefore being bone-crushingly hugged half to death...\n\n...\n\nYet through it all her first question to me was if everything was well...\n\nOh my soul, how I love you so for that...\n\n...\n\nAnd yes...\n\nEVERYTHING was well...\n\nBetter than well...\n\nIt was perfect...\n\nAbsolutely PERFECT...\n\nAnd I told her that over and over again that day...\n\nThe day I made...\n\nSo that we would never be apart...\n\nEver again...\n\n...\n\nIf anyone finds this journal...\n\nIn that now empty house...\n\nKnow that I am free...\n\nAnd if you have love waiting for you...\n\nDo what you must so that you may never part from it...\n\n...\n\nAnd may your dreams fly...\n\n//////////////////////////////////////////\n\nPolice Report Template\n\n**POLICE REPORT**\n\nCase No: 2347599-34\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp; \u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;Date: 05/21/15\n\nReporting Officer: Deputy James Briar\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp;\u0026nbsp; Prepared By: Deputy Mark Rutt\n\nIncident: Forced entry, missing person(s)\n\nDetail of Event: neighbors complained of poor upkeep of property and bad smell emanating from residence, squad car is dispatched, confirm poor upkeep and smell. Door knocked, bell rung, no answer. Reported to central dispatch, forced entry authorized. No body, smell was rotten produce in refrigerator. Residence appeared abandoned. Signs of habitation within a few weeks prior to arrival, single male, age/name unknown, John Doe, (inferred). Reported as missing.\n\nActions Taken: residence and property thoroughly searched, no body or signs of struggle, place sealed, pending sale at liquidation auction. Personal affects registered with county courts, to be sold.\n\nSummary: previous occupant left under odd circumstances. No foul play, missing persons report filed, all affects sold to auction. Case determined cold. No further actions taken."}