FSE

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The moment I got home, I felt kinda happy. I kept thinking of Josephine and her beautiful smile. Like I said, it's contagious, really, and all this time, I've been smiling. I placed my stuff on the table and like I said, I had to do groceries. So I checked the fridge to see what I needed. Come to think of it... I thought that Meagan said she would do groceries yesterday, but apparently, she didn't. I shouldn't forget to buy Nutella... I love that stuff...

So once I got to the mall, I made my way towards the supermarket, but got distracted by all sorts of window displays which had crap for sale I didn't need. I saw this huuuuge 52 inch high definition flat screen TV made by LG, but... When I looked at the price tag... Twenty-four hundred dinar... "Holy fuck-a-lucka-dingdong..." Then all of sudden, I felt a hand on my shoulder and when I looked up, I saw it was Terry in the reflection of the window. At that moment, I turned around and I was startled at first but... He looked so different... I didn't know what to do except to smile nervously at him... And he was smiling right back at me... 'Hey, Nikki...'

'Hi ...'

Then all of a sudden, he clenched his arms around my back and gave me a big firm hug... So after a moment of hesitation, I clenched my arms around his back and hugged him as well. It felt so great to get held by him like that... 'It's great to see you again, luff...'

'It's good to see you too, Terry...'

'How've you been?'

I can honestly say that I had a bit of a hard time to see Terry again. The last time I saw him, we talked about the whole deal. That we slept together. It was bothering me, and it was bothering him as well. We talked about it but... That didn't rectify our actions and I guess it didn't really help. I noticed that we both changed the way we were looking at each other, and I guess he didn't really know what to do as well. But he looked so different now for some reason. I didn't know what it was. And to the question how I've been... Heh... I just shrugged... 'What's wrong...?' he asked with a glum expression.

'Come on... Let's go for a walk...'

So we made our way outside the mall. There was this huge park located not too far from the shopping mall, with a large lake and lots of green fields, trees, the occasional pretzel stand, and lots of trees. There were actually quite a lot of people in the park, considering it was a beautiful day. And well... Terry and I were walking, while we didn't talk much. We basically asked how it was going, what we did in past months and well... That's it really... At some point, I noticed this large green field and we walked around, eventually sitting in the cool grass somewhere where we could be alone. I saw a couple of kids playing around in the distance, and up ahead was a cougar woman, playing with her baby in the grass. I couldn't resist cracking a smile when I saw that...'Nikki...?'

'Yes?'

'What's wrong with you?'

'Do you still hold it against me...?'

'What do you mean?'

'For what has happened between us...?'

'It really bothers you, doesn't it?'

'You seem to have given it a rest...'

'You think I don't have a difficult time with it? Nic... I really miss you... And... I don't want this to get in the way of our friendship... You once told me it wouldn't but... It did happen...'

'I know, Terry...'

'You act as if it's all you're fault...'

It was difficult for me to face him. So I didn't. Instead, I kept looking at the cougar woman in the distance who made funny faces to her kid to distract myself from him. To me it felt as if I confronted myself to him. I've always had difficulty with confronting people and now I'm confronting my best friend. But despite everything that happened, I still didn't know why he was still with me that day. Why he actually bothered to put a hand on my shoulder and why he's actually sitting with me here in the grass, talking about it, picking up where we left... I know how I felt about this whole deal, but never knew what he felt. So after a moment of silence, I asked him... 'How did it make you feel...?'

'What?'

'How'd you feel afterwards...?'

'Shitty... For actually doing it. It wasn't right to take advantage of you like that.'

'But it's what I wanted... And I don't know why I wanted it... Well... Sort of. Heh...''No, you THOUGHT you wanted it. Otherwise you wouldn't feel so shitty about it. You got all the right to be pissed at me. But I've always hoped that... You came back... As a friend, you know. It's because you still mean a lot to me. And... Nothing can set things right, nor will it ever be the way it once was but...'

'I can't pretend as if nothing ever happened between us, Terry. You of all people should know that.'

'I know it all too well, Nic. But I don't want to loose you as a friend.'

'And I don't want to loose you as well.'

'Heh...'

'All I want is to be certain about things. Knowing people will be there for me when I need them the most. It's because I'll be there for them as well when they need me.'

'I'll always be here for you when you need me, Nikki. Like you were there for me when I needed you...'

'Even though it wasn't... What I intended to do...'

'I'm not talking about that... But... I appreciate what you did...'

'You mean... Humping you...?'

'Pfft... No, dude.'

I just stared at him... I mean... I had no idea what he meant. Apparently, he thought the same. 'Aight, Nic. Listen up. I'll just be blunt so... Uh... Look. I admit. Sex is great, alright? It's like eh... A tube of Pringles. "Once you pop, you can't stop".

'Hehehe...'

'But... It shouldn't be used to get attention. It's not the attention you would want to get. I know Kaelyn bends over and sits on her knees a lot. Basically, she gets her brains fucked out every day. She's a fucking whore, except the difference is, is that unlike a whore, she's not getting paid for gobbling on a dick.

"Blunt indeed..." I don't know who Kaelyn is though... 'Who's Kaelyn?'

'A friend of a friend of mine. Guess why she's his friend.'

'Heh...'

'Anyway, uh... The point is... Is that... Sex only needs to be associated with love. And only with the person you care for. Aww fuck, I'm so bad at this...'

'But... I-I care for you, Terry... A-As a friend...'

'But I'm not you're lover, Nic. You don't have these special feelings for me like you have with Ceylan and Meagan. You should only do it whenever you're sharing you're life with someone and if it makes you feel comfortable for doing it... Otherwise... You'll get what you have right now.'

'But, Terry, you always said that... There's nothing wrong with sex... And... To actually like it... So... S-So why wouldn't you d-do the things you like...?'

'Sex is different for guys, Nic...'

Uh... What exactly is the difference besides the genitals...? I had no idea... So I looked at him again, waiting for him to give me an answer... 'Nikki... How come you can't see it when you're the one who opened my eyes to this?'

'Whadda ya mean...?

'I mean... I saw how heart broken you was when you told me about Meagan. I heard you telling what it is you looked for in someone. You didn't care about sex back then... All you wanted was someone to cling on to... I mean... You made me change the way I see things but what made you change the way you think...?'

'I-I don't know. I-I thought it was t-the only way to show you of how much you mean to me...'

'It's not, Nikki. Really... The fact that you're sitting here next to me is enough. Just to talk... You shouldn't give something you don't want to give...'

'Heh...'

'No really, I mean it, Nic... I know how guys think, alright? I would know. Most guys are only after one thing, and that is to score some pussy, while making you believe he actually cares for you. And the next thing you know, you'll get dumped, while you gave something to him you think is precious and special. You want passion and love. They just want a quickie. Some girls are different when it comes to having sex. I'm not saying all guys are like that but... I once was. I'm just trying to warn you to prevent things from getting out of hand.'

'You've gotten soft...'

'No, I've come to my senses and actually grew up... I had a lot of time to think things over, Nic...'

I knew he was telling the truth... Maybe if I met someone else, and we were friends for a long, long time, I'd probably tried to have sex with him or her as well... "Gaah... Why the hell am I doing this...?!" I let out a deep sigh while it stayed silent for a while. I looked at Terry for a moment and saw his eyes... He really changed... 'I never had these talks with my parents... Which... Probably explains why I'm so naive about these kind of things... Or... Pretty much about anything else...'

'Look... I know it's really bothering you and that you're ashamed of it... But you should realize that I have a part in that as well. It's not you're fault. And I'm sorry for taking advantage of you like that. But you're one of my best friends, Nic... I never wanted things to turn out like this. You don't understand of how fucking shitty I feel about it for letting it happen. For letting you do it. It's because I should've known better. But no matter how many times I tell you of how sorry I am, it'll never be enough... And... I don't want to loose you as a friend, Nic... I really don't... I'd do anything... But I can't accept that it happened until you accepted it... But the sad thing is, I didn't realize it until now...'

'Heh... Since when did you become the voice of reason...?'

'It comes with time. And it's because someone has to talk some sense into you.'

'Hehehe... Yeah, you're right on that... You've always been a good friend to me, Terry... And I want to thank you for that... Despite what happened...'

And then all of a sudden... I saw his serious expression turning into a big smile, like he always has... So cute to see... 'It's good to know that, Nic... I wouldn't know what I'd do without you... And well... It's been a long time since we sat like this...'

'Yeah...'

I took my flip-flops off and wiggled my toes in the cool grass while I looked around. Every now and than, I looked at Terry who was looking around too... A bunch of kids were playing with a ball, and than one of the kids tripped over the ball and fell face first down... It looked so hilariously stupid... Terry and I looked at each other and started to laugh our asses off... Yeah, we have a crude sense of humour... The kid got back up, dusted his trousers off and was about to run away again until he got tackled by another kid who dribbled away with the ball. Whaha... We laughed even louder after witnessing that... It was a genuine YouTube moment... And after a while, the kids ran off to the playground so we lost our only source of entertainment. It stayed quiet for a while as I looked at Terry... And I placed my hand on his stomach... Feeling his muscles through the fabric of the tank-top he was wearing... The moment he noticed I rested my hand on his stomach, he was looking a bit surprised at me... And when I looked up and smiled weakly at him, he puts an arm around my shoulder while I leaned against him... Terry loves to cuddle... And so did I... 'I missed you so much, Terry...'

'I missed you too, luv...'

I closed my eyes for a while, realizing I was cuddling him again after such a long time. It's strange really... I never knew why I couldn't face Terry... But now that I got confronted with him and what happened... Everything seemed to be different... Months were wasted while everything was settled within half an hour... It felt as if our friendship changed... For better or worse. But lying here in his arms that day was a wonderful feeling... I just hope that things would continue to go this way and that everything would be like it once was. But than I thought of Ceylan, and if he ever sees her... 'Do you still see Ceylan...?'

'Hm? No... Rarely actually. Maybe it's for the best though...'

'Oh...'

'How's she doing?'

'She's doing ok, I guess. We broke up a week ago...'

'You serious?'

'Yeah...'

'Why...?'

'Good question... I don't really know either... It's because we grow apart for some reason. And well... We both thought it would be best if we go our separate ways for a while... But I guess the four of us is slowly falling apart instead.'

'Yeah...'

'And I don't want things to fall apart, Terry... I mean... Remember how the four of us once were, and... Look at us now...'

'I guess we all got our own lives to live...'

'But... That doesn't mean we can't see each other anymore, right...?'

'All we can do is to try to keep in touch with each other. That's all we can do... And well... Truth be told, I miss Ceylan too...'

'Yeah...'

'I got my birthday coming up and well... I was thinking to invite her to the party...'

'I think she'd like that...'

'I don't know... Hopefully...'

'I'm sure she would...'

'Maybe... Who knows, Nic...'

'Are you seeing someone now...?'

'Naah... I'm single ever since Ceylan broke up. And... Stayed single ever since...'

'You've been single for a year now...?'

'Yup. And I kinda like it. I get to do my own things. With a girlfriend, you're spending six hours in a shopping mall with her only to be returned to the first shop where she visited first. She gets first dibs on everything and all. I don't have that right now, and I like it...'

'That's called manners. You're girlfriend is supposed to get first dibs on everything.'

'Yeah well, I don't have manners. Some people say manners are needed to eat in public places, or in socializing, but I'll tell you one thing. I've never learned anything about manners and I've been eating and talking my whole life.'

'Hehehehehe... So what'd you do in the mean time?'

'I started playing first person shooters again. Also... A good friend of mine returned from Sercia...'

'Really? He's a soldier?'

'Yeah. And I'm worried about him, you know?'

'Why is that...?'

'Well... It's because he changed. He once was like me, but... He's so quiet now and... Well... He really changed...'

'Oh...'

'He told me these gruesome stories. The moment he first set foot in that God awful shitty country, he was sent to the frontlines along with his squad. He told me a couple of his buddies died in combat. He had to kill people... I mean... Shit man. The poor bastard's really messed up.'

'I can imagine.'

'That's what I've said to him. You know what he said? There's no way we will ever be able to understand what he's been through. And he's right. I don't. No matter how many times he tells me about it, there's no way I'll ever be able to understand. And in some way, I'm glad I don't...'

'Heh...'

Terry and I kept on talking for hours, seeing as we had a lot of catching up to do. But at some point, I realized the time, and I forgot I still had to do groceries. Luckily, Cooper Mart is open 'till 8 pm. Terry and I did groceries together, and I asked him if he would like to stay for dinner at my place so that we could talk some more. I called Meagan to ask if she was gonna join us, but turned out she already was waiting at home for me to show up. So I asked Terry what he'd like to eat. Spaghetti. Simple, yet tasty. So we did groceries and got back home at around half past eight.

The moment I got back to my apartment with Terry, I noticed that Meagan was watching TV. Terry helped me to prepare dinner and before we know it, we all sat on the couch, slurping spaghetti Bolognese while having a good time. It really felt like old times again... At some point, Meagan laughed so hard she almost choked in her spaghetti and a noodle flew out of her mouth. And well, after we were done eating, Terry stayed 'till deep in the night. I thought it was a bit of a rude thing to do to let him walk home when it was getting really late, so I brought him back home in my Cinquecento. It's funny to see a big guy like him all crammed up inside a cookie-jar on wheels... But still... We had a really good time, and that's all I ever wanted. Just the way how things used to be. But that night, while I was alone in bed, I was thinking about Ceylan. Wishing she would've been here...

Ever since that Tuesday, I really had the feeling that things would eventually be alright. I mean... It felt as if I made a whole new beginning. Talking to Josephine and Terry helped, maybe even more than I realized at the time. I just hoped that things could go on like that. And for the first time in my life, I had the feeling that things would finally brighten up.

The next day however, I noticed that sheet of paper Josephine gave me. "Name three things you like about yourself and three things you don't like about yourself". So I took a pen and that sheet of paper and thought that this was harder than it seemed. What do I like about myself? Hm... I'm certainly not optimistic. So what do I really like about myself? "I'm always trying to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, and not judging them by appearance". That's not really true, because I try to avoid people who look intimidating to me. Anyway, what else? "Trying to help my friends whenever they need me". Oh, I like that one. And eh... Hm... I thought about it for a very long time. But I didn't know the third thing I liked about myself. I still had a couple of days to go before seeing Josephine again, so I decided to skip that one for now. On to the things I don't like about myself. Heh... That shouldn't be too hard. I got lots of things I don't like about myself. "Being naive" for starters. "I'm too dependant on others". And... "Pretending to be someone else other than myself". I still had a long list of the things I don't like about myself. But Josephine only said to write down 3 things. Which I did. But over the days, I never figured out the third thing I actually liked about myself...

And so, a couple of days passed by. Terry and I were hanging out every now and then, and whenever we did, it was a lot of fun. And I'm glad things started to work out again between the two of us. Slowly but steady, I noticed I could live with the idea that we slept together. Because... Well... To be honest, it wasn't a bad experience... Whenever Terry wasn't around, there was Meagan... Like I said, things finally started to brighten up a bit. But again, I couldn't help but to think of Ceylan at night...

'Hi, welcome!'

Josephine stood in the room where I had my session before. The moment I got in the room, I noticed she was wearing this really, really short skirt and a blouse that revealed a bit of her bosom... Sexy stockings with high heels... I was so startled seeing her like that, but the way she smiled at me made me so nervous... 'H-Hey...' I stuttered with a smile...

'Take you're seat! Would you like some coffee or tea?'

'C-Coffee p-please...'

'Alright, I'll be right back and we'll get started...'

"Damn... She's really something..." I mean... Just look.... The way she walks... The way she talks to me... Beautiful, beautiful curves... Her hips, her legs... I mean.... Shit... She looks as if she walked right out of a model's magazine, or from a catwalk or something. No pun intended. But I bet she's already taken. Someone like her isn't going to be alone for a long time. I bet she could have anyone she wanted. All she had to do was to snap her fingers and guys would be panting on their knees and do anything for her. Well, I would do the same really, if she snapped her fingers, but I don't really see that happening...

The moment she got back, I looked at her... She closed the door and placed the drinks on the table, and after that she faced me and smiled at me for a moment. Then she went over to a cabinet, and got out a dossier, filled with papers. When she wanted to close the cabinet, she dropped a couple of papers and bend over to pick them up.... And I could see she wasn't wearing any underwear... Josephine turned her head to face me and smiled innocently again... I could've sworn I could get a nose-bleed any second. I couldn't help myself to stare at her perfect round tight buttocks. Her upper body went left and right while she picked up those papers and it caused her buttocks to wiggle right in front of me. I could swear she did it on purpose... But nonetheless, I stay seated... She took her seat after that while she continued to smile innocently at me... 'So, how you've been?'

'Huh? O-Oh! I-I'm fine, h-how about you?'

'I'm good, thanks for asking...'

And so, the conversation started off. We talked and talked... Then talked some more. Picking up where we left off last time. But... I noticed that... The longer I was talking to her, the closer she seemed to get in her chair. She took off her high heels, saying that they hurt her ankles and excused herself for that... I saw how her paws got revealed while she was wearing stockings and... Telling me that it's warm inside... That the air-conditioning is broken and that someone was coming to fix it the next week... She opened the window and unbuttoned her vest, but her breasts weren't shown... And for some reason, I was being oblivious to these things while we kept on talking about my difficulties. At some point, I closed my eyes while I was talking, and the moment I opened them, she was sitting on her knees right in front of me, placing her hand on my thigh as she kept looking me in the eyes with an expression as if she felt really sorry for me... I looked with wide eyes at her as she was just smiling, and I noticed that I started to stutter again. Josephine told me to take my time and that it's ok. She took my hand and placed it in hers, as a reassuring gesture... She was still listening as I was stuttering but... At some point, she sat on the table, and gently placed her paws on my stomach... And slowly... Moved them down to my inner thighs... I could feel the fabric of her stockings on my thighs, considering I was wearing a skirt. And she kept rubbing gently with her paws over my thighs... Oh dear God... Why the hell was she doing this...? How in the hell am I able to talk when I feel so... So fucking aroused by her? I shouldn't be. But... She did say it was ok... She never told me it wasn't ok to be aroused by her. Even though she's like... Ten years older then me... And then all of a sudden... She got up from the table and sat on my stomach. Josephine placed her hands on my cheeks and moved her head closer towards my face until her nose poked my nose... And she looked me straight in the eyes. It was overwhelming. Her scent was intoxicating... 'What goes through your mind whenever you see yourself naked in the mirror...? Hm...?'

'I-I don't know... I-I just... D-Don't know what to t-think...'

'And it's also making you insecure when... When you're having sex with Ceylan...'

'Yes...'

'But you made passionate love with her way back... So what went wrong...?'

'I-I don't know... We haven't been intimate with each other for a long time...'

'Tell me...'

'Wh-What...?'

'Did she do something that made you feel uncomfortable...?'

'N-No...'

'Than what were the two of you doing to each other...?'

'W-Well... I-I used to sit on top of her f-face... A-And... S-Sometimes... W-We were just on top of each other, touching one another in the way w-we liked... Sh-She always made me... M-Made me feel special b-but... Whenever I tried to please her, I-I had the feeling a-as if I was no good...'

'Did she ever tell you that...?'

'N-No... B-But it's making me insecure...'

'I see... So... What do you expect from me and the sessions...?'

'I just... Want to find a way to be comfortable with myself and... Her... Not... Just for me but... For my love life as well...'

'And you're sex-life...'

'Y-Yes...'

She continued to smile at me for a moment... But then she got up... 'Come on, I'd like to show you something.'

'Wh-What?'

'It's ok, don't be scared...'

She took my hand and gently lifted it up while she looked me right in the eyes. How come someone as her can be so persuasive without having to say anything? The moment I stood up, she gently placed her paws on my shoulders and guided me to a large mirror on the wall. I had no idea what she was doing... 'Wh-What are you-'

'Sssh...'

She gently took off my top. And slowly pulled my skirt down... She made me lift up my right leg, and then my left leg to remove the skirt completely. I didn't want to, but it felt as if I was frozen and couldn't do anything. She placed my clothes on one of the chairs while I was standing there, in my underwear, watching myself in the mirror. 'Look, Nicole...'

'Wh-What...?'

'You have to see it like this... Everyone... Has a couple of layers in their heads. Containing their feelings and thoughts... The deeper you bury in those layers, the more vulnerable the person will feel... But if you confront them directly... Those feelings might be exposed for others to understand. Which will eventually lead to deal with the source of those problems. And you're problem is, is that you can't see yourself naked in the mirror... Do you understand what I'm telling you...?

'N-No, d-don't... P-Please, don't do this...'

'Ssssh... It's ok... Don't look at me, Nicole. Look in the mirror. And tell me what you see...'

'Wh-What...?'

'What do you see...?'

'M-Myself... I-In underwear...'

'Hmm-mm... And what do you like about "Myself" whenever you see her...?'

'Her stomach... A-And eyes...'

'Anything else...?'

'Her legs... Her face... Her hair... And... Th-The way she's looking at me...'

'And how is she looking at you...? What expression does she has on her face...?'

'She looks baffled...'

'Hmm-mm... And what do you think of her...?'

'She's beautiful....'

'She is...'

I can honestly say that it was very awkward to see myself like that in the mirror. Truth was, I didn't consider saying those things about myself, but it was as if I was saying these things to someone else. But the moment Josephine said that she was beautiful, made me realize she was talking about me. And the more I stared at her in the mirror, the more beautiful she seemed to get. But then... I felt that Josephine was touching my back. And then all of a sudden, I noticed my bra came off... And I felt that she gently pulled my panties down... 'Do you see her expression...?' Josephine said quietly...

'Yes...'

'Why would she look so surprised...?'

'Because... B-Because I'm naked...'

'Yes... Do you see a difference in her beauty...?'

'N-No... Well... Besides seeing her breasts... A-And vagina...'

'Do you like what you see...?'

'Yes...'

'Do you think she's feeling comfortable right now whenever she's looking at you...?'

I took a good look at "her" in the mirror... She didn't look uncomfortable... So I quickly nodded... And I noticed "she" nodded too... 'Remember, Nicole... That girl you see is you... Her stomach, her eyes, her legs... Her breasts and vagina... Everything you see and like about her, is part of who you are... And all those parts form you... Beauty comes in many different ways, either on the inside or on the outside. But it's a rare thing to find both in just one person...' Remember that...'

Strange... I never considered myself the way she portrait me. It's strange how I considered myself to be beautiful rather than being neutral in that area... I guess I never stood still by the thought of it. I never had an opinion about my own body, which is probably the reason why I thought I was ugly. If I didn't considered myself to be beautiful, I was ugly for sure. But this confrontation changed the way I look at myself. It's strange really, how the same things can have a total different meaning when it's placed in a different context... But than I noticed in the mirror that Josephine was on her knees behind me... 'Lift you're tail up, dear...'

'Wh-What...? Why...?'

'It's part of you're session...' she said with a cheeky smile while I just stood there... 'Don't worry, I'm being paid for this... After all, it's my job to help you...'

'Eh... I-I eh...'

'Don't be shy... It's ok...'

So I lifted my tail up a bit... I felt how her paws were gently caressing my inner thighs, slowly making their way up my crotch. How could I resist it when I saw her touching me in the mirror...? I couldn't. Especially when I felt she was spreading my pussy lips, and gently started rubbing up and down from behind... It felt so awkward... But I didn't want her to stop... I only wanted more. And I swear, the moment I thought that, she sticks her head through my legs, turned around, and gently inserts the tip of her finger in me... And all this time I felt completely relaxed... I couldn't think... All I could do was to look in the mirror, watching her how she did all those things... At some point, she inserts her finger in me, gently pushing her way through... As if she knew where she had to go... It's obvious that she's done it before... Maybe she did this to herself whenever she was alone... But she knew. Josephine made this "come here" motion with her finger while it was inside of me... I bend through my knees a bit to make more room for her and the moment I did, she used her thumb to stimulate my clitoris. I felt more and more aroused by the minute... And after she fingered me for a while, she took her finger out, and puts it in her own mouth, licking it clean... She looks at me for a moment as she continued to smile, while I just stood there, trying to control my own breathing... 'How was that...?'

'G-Good... I-I liked it...'

'When was the last time you made love to Ceylan?'

'A-A long time ago...'

'And when was the last time you've touched yourself...?'

'Heh... Uh... E-Even longer ago...'

'But it feels great, doesn't it...?'

'Y-Yeah...'

'See... The key to be comfortable with your own body and hers and to fully enjoy the sex is to know what you and Ceylan like... Communication can set a lot of things right... But you have to take one step at a time... So I suggest that... You masturbate and try to find out what you like...'

"She's beautiful and a sexpert... Hm, perfect catch..."

'B-But I-I know what I like...'

'Than what's keeping you from touching yourself...?'

'I-I don't know...'

And as it stayed silent for a short moment, I looked back at the chair where my clothes were and I walked over to it... But the moment I wanted to put my panties back on, Josephine placed her hands on my waist and moved down to my hands.... So I let go of my panties while she pulled them down again... The moment I looked at her, she smiled at me... 'Session's not over yet, Nicole...'

And then she got in front of me while she held of both of my butt-cheeks... Josephine kissed my chest... Her tongue gently went over my erect nipples and every now and then, she opened her mouth a bit and sucked on my nipples.... Soft gasps and squeaks escaped from my throat, and by the looks on her face, she enjoys how she pleases me... At some point, I felt how her hands drifted downwards, touching my vagina... And than she slowly started to push me towards the chair while I felt I was completely immobilized by the things she did... Once I got down in the chair, she lifts my left leg up and gently inserts a finger in me while she caressed my right thigh... And so, she was fingering me for a while as I couldn't hold myself anymore... I started to gasp a bit louder to let her know my pleasures, and even though I always tried to be as quietly as possible, I had a really hard time with being quiet now... And then... She moved her head down between my legs as she pulled her finger out. Josephine was determined to let me moan... I could feel her warm breath against my vagina, followed by her gentle touches of the tip of her tongue, while I kept looking down at her. Very slowly, she went up and down with her tongue, while she rubbed my clitoris with her thumb. It didn't took long for me to loose control over my body... She lifts my left leg up, and placed it over her shoulder so that she had more room while she kept on licking... Heh... Typical feline behaviour. They love to lick. Maybe that's one of the reasons why I always wanted to spend the night with Ceylan... I wanted her to go faster... But she did the opposite. She went slower. And the licking stopped... Instead, she inserts a finger in me as she made that "come here" gesture again... The moment she did that, I started to gasp... Irregular breathing turned into soft squeaks escaping from my throat. The moment I thought it couldn't get any better, she started to suck on my clitoris. I guess it could get better... The feelings only got stacked up the longer she did that. One of those feelings felt as if I had to pee real badly... I didn't want to pee in her face. It's considered to be rude to do such a thing... But I couldn't help it... At some point, those feelings exploded with such intensity, and I let out a loud moan while I felt fluids dripping out of me. I think I just squirted in her face... But she obviously didn't mind... I just experienced the most intense orgasm I ever had... Josephine was licking everything clean between my legs... I was shaking in the chair while she was licking her face and fingers clean... Then she looked at me with a smile... 'It's okay...' Josephine said quietly... 'I'll see you next week...'

Right that very moment, I opened my eyes and I felt exhausted and panted my lungs out for some reason... When I looked around, I noticed I was at home in bed... It was just a dream... "Fuck... I knew it was too good to be true..." But... Immediately, I felt something wet... My panties... They were soaking wet... And I realized the orgasm I had was real... I had a wet dream... The moment I looked on my alarm clock, I noticed it was six AM in the morning... For hours, I stayed in bed, just closing my eyes, remembering that dream... That's all my life ever was... Just a dream... Dreams get shattered... It's inevitable to wake up... And that's what I did just now... Waking up... I let out a sigh and stared into blank space... Thinking of Ceylan... And what she was doing at this very moment... While I wished she was here... And then all of a sudden, it struck me...

Now... Call me stupid or... Whatever it is you'd like to call me but... I really felt as if that dream had a message. It was so obvious all of a sudden. It was right there in front of me this whole time, without even knowing it. I felt as if Josephine was helping me with my difficulties in real life, and that she wanted to help me with my love and sex life through a dream. To make me feel comfortable with my own body... The mirror in that dream showed me so many things about myself. I kept thinking about it while I was taking a shower that morning. Would it be ok to actually be aroused by her...? I can't help it that she's so damn sexy... She's way older than me. But she never said that it wasn't okay to think of her...

When I got out of the shower, I wrapped myself up in a towel, and made my way to my room. Once I got there, I looked through my closets to see what I was gonna wear. Once I picked my clothing and placed it on the bed, I noticed the large mirror on the wall. I hesitated for a while but I stood in front of it anyway. Looking at me wrapped up in a large towel... After standing in front of the mirror for a while, I was hesitating if I should actually do the same thing I did in that dream. Then the towel slowly came off, but still covering a large part of my body. I closed my eyes and let the towel down to my stomach. The moment I opened them, I saw my breasts... Thirty-four C cup... I saw my nipples were erect by the cold breeze I felt coming out of the small window and could see the closed curtains gently waving back and forth. After looking at myself for a while, I placed my left hand on my breast, while holding with my right hand on the towel. The towel dropped, covering my crotch, but it did reveal my left thigh in the mirror. It looked as if I was wearing a dress while I gently squeezed my soft breast. It's actually kinda sexy, standing like that... Gently caressing my breast, feeling my nipple every time in the palm of my hand. It's not that bad as I always thought it was... I'm proud of my breasts... Their natural and not some... Silicone induced hot-air balloons... It fits perfectly in the palm of my hand. Then I questioned myself... Why would I be ashamed of something I liked...? Because that's the reason why I always covered myself up and didn't had the guts to see myself naked. But that dream was so... I don't know... Convincing... I had no idea what it was that caused me to do this. But that dream certainly helped. I lowered the towel even further down, revealing my vagina. And once I was looking at that... Thingy... I dropped the towel completely. And I stood there butt naked. It's so strange to actually see it. All this time I've been covering up, being ashamed about my own body while I didn't know why. There's nothing wrong with my body... And the more I stared at it, the more I started to like it... It's so strange really, as if that dream turned a switch inside of my head. This couldn't be a coincidence... Josephine wanted to help me... The message was clear all of a sudden. I turned around, and took a good look at my body... Tight firm butt... With a ridiculously large tail just above. My paws... Hips... I didn't really have this hourglass figure that Ceylan has but... It's not that bad. Looking at every inch of my body, I thought "It's not that bad..." "Really... It's not..."

And ever since that day, I did what Josephine told me to do with that sheet of paper, except... I said those two things I liked about myself out loud while I was standing naked in front of the mirror. At first, it felt really awkward saying these things while I was naked, and I really had my doubts if I should do it or not but... I'm glad I did. At some point, I also did this at night, right before I went to bed. I had less sleepless nights then before, all because of this simple thing Josephine told me to do. It's strange really, but I guess everything is between you're head. And whenever I was in bed, I felt myself drifting away in my own little world, like I always did, where everything is just perfect. It did make me feel better, but I knew I still had a long way to go...