Defiant and Loyal Chapter 1
#51 of Care Bear Magi Life
Set in the "Care Bear Magi Life" universe, this story follows my OC Defiant Heart Badger from that series on his own personal journey of self discovery and acceptance
Me: Alright so... I have a confession to make. I was going to write this as part of the original Care Bear Magi Life story, but Defiant Heart asked me change things for... personal reasons.
Defiant Heart: It's very personal OK, I was scared so I just asked... Do I call you Cryos? OK. Don't blame Cryos, I asked him to change things because I was scared. After some time to think about it and some convincing from Loyal Heart I decided to stop being scared and let Cryos write and publish this version.
Me: Yeah, so I remade most of the chapter but I cut off after the big moment here, and edited a few things. As far as continuity is concerned the events and changes in this redux are considered canon to any sequels or follow ups I do for Care Bear Magi Life.
The events of this chapter take the place of the events in Chapter 21, except the end where everyone meets Love Heart's family which I didn't include because they don't change.
Chapter 1: Redux
"Love Heart, wake up." Love Heart stirred in his bed then rolled over, his eyes bleary. Was that Life Heart? He drew his hand across his eyes to clear them and saw what looked like the ghostly image of his mom, Life Heart Unicorn, standing next to his bed.
"Mom?" He sat up.
"Good. I need to be short, we are leaving now and will be there in eight hours. Please come meet us." This image froze in place, like a video on pause.
Love Heart nodded, "OK, I'll see you at the airport later, mom." He waited for a moment then the image disappeared. Love Heart shook his head as he became fully awake and smiled, "My family's coming, they're coming! Woo!" Love Heart's shout reverberated through the house. He glanced at the clock, 4:25am, then strolled out of his room.
Defiant Heart emerged from his bedroom and glared at the giddy bear, "Keep it down, we're trying to sleep." Love Heart didn't even seem to notice him. Defiant Heart grumbled then went back to bed.
"What was that?" Crafty mumbled in her half asleep state as Defiant got in next to her.
"Just Love Heart, go back to sleep," Defiant Heart smashed his head back into his pillow.
Four hours later Defiant Heart finally came downstairs; he didn't even bother to take off the shirt and shorts he'd slept in as he grabbed some cereal and sat down to munch. Love Heart came in from the back door a moment later covered in sweat and passed by Defiant on his way to the shower. When Love Heart came down he was finally dressed in the same clothes he'd first arrived in, thankfully washed several times in the past month.
"You're happy today, what happened?" Defiant dumped his dishes in the dishwasher.
Love Heart was smiling, "My family's finally coming, they'll be here in four hours." Love Heart grabbed his own bowl of cereal, "So why are you sleeping with Crafty Heart?"
"I'm letting her share my bed, much as I'd rather not, because I don't want to force her to sleep on the couch after everything she's been through," Defiant turned to Love Heart, "And you took the guest room."
"Right. So how did your conversation with your parents go?" Love Heart sat down and dug into his breakfast.
Defiant Heart sighed and leaned up against the wall with his arms folded, "It barely went at all."
"Did you at least hear them out?"
Defiant Heart opened his mouth to shout, then closed it and thought before he continued, "Honestly, I don't want to hear them out. They've almost completely ignored me for my entire life and I'm just supposed to forgive them after all of that? I don't think they deserve a chance anymore." Defiant stared at the ground, "You've been more of a parent to me in the last month than they ever have."
Love Heart looked up and swallowed his mouthful of cereal, "All I've done is teach you kinetics."
"And that's more than they've ever taught me. My teachers had to teach me how to tie my shoes." Defiant looked up, "Can we get some practise in before you head out."
"Sure," Love Heart drank the rest of his cereal then dropped his dishes in the dishwasher before they headed out back.
Defiant Heart held his hands up and focused his mana into them, trying to give it some form.
Love Heart stood facing Defiant Heart with his arms folded, "Don't rush it, you don't want to hurt yourself."
Defiant bared his teeth as there was as shimmer in between his hands, "I can do this!" A moment later several white flecks appeared and floated in between his hands.
Love Heart blinked, "That's not what I expected. Hold still," Love Heart reached in and plucked one of the white flecks from the field. He stared at it and felt it, "I have no idea what this is, Defiant?"
Defiant Heart was visibly sweating and panting as he maintained the field of white flecks.
"You can stop!" Love Heart dropped the fleck, which dissolved, and grabbed Defiant Heart's shoulder. Defiant stopped and let the field disperse. Love Heart smiled, "It's very draining the first few times you do that."
"Right," Defiant nodded and managed to stand on wobbly feet, "I need a shower, and some food."
Love Heart had left by the time Defiant Heart had showered. He came downstairs in fresh clothes only to find Crafty Heart munching on some cold take-out pizza. She swallowed, "Morning, Defiant."
"Morning," Defiant Heart opened the fridge and dug out another piece of cold pizza.
Crafty sat down at the table as she finished her slice. "Thanks for sharing your bed."
"No problem," Defiant Heart said with his mouth half-full.
"So why did you let me sleep with you?" Crafty propped her head up on the table with her arms.
"Because you've been through enough and I wasn't going to make you sleep on the couch." Defiant said.
Crafty leaned back in her chair and folded her arms under her breasts, "Question: do you find me attractive?" She smirked.
"Nope."
Crafty blinked, "What?"
"I don't find you attractive," Defiant Heart said.
Crafty wilted slightly, "Why not...?"
Defiant Heart could see Crafty's downcast expression and sighed, "I don't find any girls or women attractive, Crafty, I'm gay."
Crafty started but sat up straighter, "You are?"
Defiant nodded, "I am."
"How did you find out?"
Defiant rolled his eyes, "No parental supervision and unlimited internet access. Does it bother you?"
Crafty shook her head, "No, it's just... well I couldn't tell."
Defiant Heart groaned, "Not every gay man is a 'queen', Crafty."
"Sorry..." Crafty fidgeted in her chair.
"Relax, it's not a big deal. I never bothered to show it off anyway, not like it mattered," Defiant Heart rolled his eyes sideways.
Crafty thought for a moment, "Wait, did you have a crush on Anger Heart?"
Defiant Heart snorted, "Don't tell me you buy into that 'picking on him means you like him' bullshit. I bullied him because I thought it was easy because he was different," he folded his arms, "It was stupid and cruel and I only did it because I needed some attention, even if it was bad." Defiant sighed, "I want to say that I would do it differently if I could go back but honestly I'd still have the same baggage that I have now so I'd probably be the same asshole I've always been." He looked up at Crafty with mild annoyance on his face, "Are you ever going to get dressed?"
Crafty Heart stood up, "Even if I could go back home, none of my clothes fit now."
Defiant Heart sighed, "Right, too loose?"
Crafty Heart grinned and put her arms behind her head, "Nope, too tight. I didn't just fill out but I measured myself at Anger Heart's and I grew about 10cm since I changed. I had to literally tear those stupid robes apart with my new teeth," she grinned which showed off her sharper canines.
Defiant Heart stared at her, his mouth twisted sideways and his left eye half-squinted, "What?!"
Crafty huffed and looked up at the ceiling, "Yeah well in case you hadn't noticed I was kind of a shrimp for an 18-year old, heck I'm pretty sure I skipped puberty," she grinned again, "That crystal gave me everything I wanted and more!"
Defiant glowered at her and folded his arms, "Well I'm so happy you're enjoying it!" his voice dripped sarcasm.
Crafty turned to Defiant Heart and sighed, "Yeah, I get it you hate that this was forced on you, but here's some news," she jabbed her right thumb at her chest, "I literally asked for this!"
Defiant Heart opened his mouth, ready to shoot back, then stopped and shut it again. He saw the smirk that Crafty gave him then glared again and finally spoke up, "And did you think about what this was going to do to your life?"
"You mean other than save me from my family?" Crafty put her hands on her hips.
Defiant growled, "Yeah you escaped, but now what can you do?" he counted off on his fingers as he continued, "You don't have a home, or a social insurance number, or any money, or any possessions, or citizenship," he pointed his index finger at her, "If you're not Samantha then you don't even legally exist! How are you supposed to live like that? Mooch off me for the rest of your life?! Did you even think about how fucked your life was going to be once you transformed?!"
Crafty was taken aback, but she regained her mental footing and fired back, "Do you have any idea how fucked my life was going to be if I didn't do this?!" She slapped her chest symbol with her hand, "My parents were shipping me off to a convent where I was going to be smashed, molded and drained of my spirit until I was an empty husk just like my sister! Yeah I gave up everything for this but at least I have the freedom to choose whatever I do with my life now!" As she spoke she had closed the distance between herself and Defiant Heart and jabbed a finger into his chest, "And what's your big problem? Your parents don't pay attention to you? Oh boo hoo!"
Defiant's eyes twitched, "You have no idea!" he bared his teeth in rage and before he knew it he had punched Crafty in the face. Crafty Heart staggered backwards with her hand over nose. She pulled it away to see that she had a nose bleed then looked up at Defiant Heart, who now stood with his hands clenched into fists. Their blood boiled and Crafty let out a howl and pounced on him.
Defiant Heart and Crafty were rolling around on the kitchen and onto the living room floor kicking, scratching, biting and punching until they were bleeding and bruised (albeit hidden by their fur except for Defiant's black eye). The fight finally ended when Crafty's head smacked into the leg of a side table and stars burst in her vision only for a cheap empty vase to fall off and smash over Defiant's head which left him briefly senseless.
They were both lying on their backs on the kitchen floor, waiting for their heads to stop pounding when Defiant finally spoke. "That was a low blow."
"At least I didn't kick you in the nuts," Crafty shot back. "You have it easy."
"Excuse me?!" Defiant Heart tried to push himself up, only for his head to start spinning as he fell to his back again.
Crafty just put a hand to her head, willing the pain to stop, "You heard me. You complain that your parents don't pay attention to you and yeah I get why you were such an ass in school, but at least your parents love you." She waited for a response, but only received a grunt from Defiant Heart, "They know you're a badger and they didn't throw you out. You can do whatever you want and your parents will probably still support you. Despite your looks you could probably do anything you wanted for the rest of your life, get a job, travel or just lie around with no real ambition."
Still no response except for a grunt.
Crafty forced herself to sit up then looked over at the badger, who just stared at the ceiling. She looked away, "All those things you said I gave up, I never really had them."
"What?" Defiant Heart rolled over on his side to get a look at her.
Crafty was crying but she kept her voice level, "I didn't have a SIN, or a driver's license, and my parents always reminded me that the stuff I owned was really theirs. Yeah I mooched off my friends but I never even had an allowance so I didn't have a choice. Honestly the only thing I don't have now is my own bedroom or clothes and that's a small price to pay for what I've gained." Crafty used the table to stand up then offered a hand to Defiant, "I'm sorry about what I said."
Defiant Heart accepted her hand, "It's fine, sorry I punched you."
Crafty smirked as she pulled him to his feet, "I think we're pretty even on that."
RIIIIIP!
Defiant Heart eyes went wide as the sound and feel of tearing a fabric rent his ears as he was pulled to his feet. He looked down, desperately hoping it was his shirt or shorts, but felt his face go pale as two mounds seemed to blossom on his chest.
Crafty Heart let go of his hand and just stared at the two large lumps on the badger's chest. Without thinking she reached forwards and prodded one then the other, feeling a bit firm but real through the shirt fabric.
That seemed to shock Defiant out of his stupor as he looked up at Crafty with venom in his eyes, "Crafty, stop poking my breasts."
"Your what?! They're real?!" Crafty's mouth was agape as Defiant Heart pulled his... his? Her? Pulled the shirt off and unwound a long strip of what looked like cotton which had torn during their fight and had been apparently holding the breasts on Defiant Heart's torso.
"Crap... they've gotten bigger," Defiant Heart looked at the cotton strip then tore off the shorter end, "I'll need a new one. Wait here and don't say anything!" Defiant Heart hissed before heading upstairs.
Crafty had cleaned up the broken vase and was still mentally processing what had happened when Defiant Heart returned, breasts now held tight against torso by a fresh strip of cloth. Defiant Heart bounced a couple times to make sure it would hold before turning to Crafty Heart.
Before he could answer she blurted out, "You're a girl! I mean, why!? How?! What?!"
Defiant Heart walked over and pushed a finger to her lips in a 'shush' motion. "I'm a guy, Crafty, at least that's how I see myself even if I have tits."
Crafty pushed his hand away as he retrieved his shirt and pulled it on. Come to think of it she'd never seen him without a shirt after his transformation, he even slept in one despite the heat. "So did the Great Wishing Star do this to you?"
Defiant Heart shook his head, "No. I've always been like this, even when I was human." He gave her a look as he sat down on the couch, "I'll tell you if you promise to keep it a secret, alright?" Crafty nodded then sat down next to him.
Defiant Heart sighed deeply, "As far as I know, I was born this way..."
"A hermaphrodite?" Crafty Heart suddenly recoiled as Defiant Heart growled at her.
"Don't use that word! The term is intersex." Defiant Heart took a huge breath before he continued, "I was always like this, but my parents never told me I was different. The fact that I pissed out of two holes never really phased me, not like I ever bothered to look into it why would I? My parents never put me in daycare, just had a bunch of caregivers while my parents worked all the time, I don't think I ever had the same babysitter more than once. Once I was ten they just started leaving me home alone but they never told me I was different..."
"So how did you find out... oh..." Crafty's memory sparked and Defiant confirmed what she was thinking.
"Sex-ed in grade six." He sighed, "Good thing they didn't split the boys and girls up to explain things but that was when I first learned that men and women were physically different between the legs. After the first class I had to run off and hide in the boy's room and check myself... After that my whole world just kind of shattered. I spent all night online looking up what I was, what it meant and just..." He hung his head, "What I read, what I learned... broke me. I didn't know what I was or who I was, but at least I knew why my parents were never around. They didn't want to have to deal with their freak child who wasn't a boy or a girl... And I learned how people like me are treated in this world for being stuck between sexes. I went to forums and talked about it anonymously and saw how people reacted... it was horrifying...
"I called in sick the next day, probably would have kept doing it if my parents wouldn't have taken notice. After that I just didn't talk to anyone at school for the rest of the year. And then our schools got merged into that big super elementary school and... well you can talk to Anger Heart and Guidance Heart about that. They looked like bigger freaks than me but were accepted so I just snapped. Tormenting them was both to try and get people to notice me and to take out all my rage on easy targets, especially since puberty was hitting and I was starting to notice."
Defiant rubbed his chest where his breasts were compressed so as to be invisible, "They didn't grow big at first but I was terrified someone would see them, so I started binding them and lagging behind in gym class so no one would see me shower. Had to make mad dashes to class after each gym lesson... I had to keep it a secret so I didn't even go to my doctor anymore, I mean they probably knew but I just couldn't face the truth because they never told me it was unusual either..."
"And then this happened," Defiant gestured to his body with both hands, "I was turned into a Care Badger for tormenting Alex and Germaine... Part of me hoped the change would at least settle my sex into one or the other, but no it just seemed to make both more prominent."
Crafty smirked and patted her chest, "Well I can see how that would have happened."
Defiant didn't seem to hear her, "I was too scared to go shopping for bras or anything else feminine because I just knew someone from school would see me and figure things out. Believe me this binding hurts but I've learned to live with it..."
Crafty reached out and put a hand on Defiant's shoulder, "It's alright. I'm here and I'm fine with this."
Defiant Heart carefully shrugged to make Crafty let go, "Of course you're fine with this. The way you grew up you just love to accept what's abnormal." Defiant touched his chest, "I don't even know what I am some days, and this isn't helping."
"I'm sure if you just tell everyone-" Defiant's growl silenced Crafty.
"No! I'm not telling anyone and neither are you! I'm not risking everything because of this!" Defiant Heart was practically snarling, which made Crafty recoil.
"Alright I won't tell anyone, but you can't keep this a secret for ever Defiant," Crafty stood up from the couch.
Defiant Heart just stared at the floor, "...I know..."