Demons of the Past {Part 1}
I'm uploading this in two parts, I find it more dramatic ;) also, I have been waaaaay out of practice with writing due to real world stress and mental blockadge. I feel that this might have helped the mental writers block and get some shit off my chest. Rated adult for the second part. Warning! Drama!
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Demons, they have a funny way of creeping up on your soul and not letting go until you bury them. Deeper than the back of your mind or the bottom of your heart, you must go back, to where they came from, and bury them there. ~Foxy
She sighed and shifted in her seat. Inwardly groaning at putting herself through this. On a plane, headed towards everything about herself that she tried to forget. It wasn't like she didn't know what was going to happen. But she knew something had to be done. The sleepless nights and disassociated days were getting to her. The Large lady two rows in front of her sneezed again, and Foxy grimaced. Great, here's for getting sick...
"Hey you, staying calm?" The dark charcoal wolf seated next to her placed a soothing paw on her thigh. The red and black fox smiled and then frowned.
"I don't want to do this... I know what's going to happen... no one is going to understand and I'll just be ridiculed and hated more." Foxy almost whimpered in distress. Hanging her head as if in defeat. "Do I really need to do this?"
"You tell me fox, you think you can sleep at night if you get off this plane? You think you can figure this out without closure? Because it has worked so well so far." His sarcasm was harsh, but when she looked in his eyes she saw that they were full to the brim with caring love.
"I would hate for this to make me worse is all." She could feel herself trying to make excuses which did nothing to help the situation.
"Then don't let it. Be strong fox, prove them wrong." He reached past her, pushing up the window to see out and placing a small kiss on her forehead as he passed. "I believe in you, even if you don't."
"Thank you Sir." A weak smile made its way across her muzzle, and she gripped his paw with hers. Seat-belt lights came on seconds later and Foxy knew then that there was no turning back from this. She watched as her home, everything she loved, disappeared behind her. I already feel homesick... I'll be back soon enough.
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It was raining when they landed, luckily the thunder decided to hold off until they landed. A face of pure disgust was making its home on Foxy's face as she looked out the large windows of the airport. Even the trees are better back home._Green shrubs littered the walkways, while large cedars and pines took up most of the background of her view. She huffed, unhappy that she couldn't see snowcapped mountains and cherry blossoms. She could only see walls of green and low growing dogwoods. _I guess it does have its own appeal, I feel very secluded. She shivered at the thought. Not wanting to be alone in this venture was the whole point of bringing along her Sir. She didn't usually call upon him like this, but he needed a vacation as well. Her fluffy black tipped red tail swung as she turned to find him. They were to meet up with the others here and make their way to dinner. Spotting him across the lobby she started towards him, small backpack in tow.
She felt empowered over all the other inhabitants of the airport. Every face she lay eyes upon seemed unhappy in some way. Small pups crying and begging for the attention of worn out parents, business rats hurriedly ending phone calls before catching their plane, an older couple saying a tearful goodbye. The whole room made the vixen's mood drop further, and she hurried towards her companions. Sir was standing in line at a coffee stand, a well hidden look of disgust on his face. She giggled, and joined him, happy to have someone there for her.
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"I can't do this... I can't..."
"You've come this far fox, I know you can do it. You must."
"Sir... I..."
"Would it help if it was an order?"
"No, I need to do this on my own." Foxy sighed, took one more longing gaze at the weather beaten screen door, and finally opened the rental car door.
"Want me to go in with you?" He already had his seatbelt undone, a concerned look in his eyes.
"No, I'll be fine. This should be quick. If I'm not finished in fifteen minutes call my cell. If I don't answer then come inside." A flash of emotion flickered through her eyes. Just as suddenly as it had come it was gone. Replaced with cold determination. Sir smirked and cranked up the stereo, laughing quietly when the song that played matched the situation perfectly. Foxy grinned, and walked stoically towards the last shred of her past.
She was glad to be wearing boots, the yard full of tripping hazards and large rusted car pieces. Tall grass tickling the underside of her tail as she tried to keep her balance on the uneven ground. She sniffed the air, smelling rancid trash on the wind. Without gagging, she made her way forward. She looked towards the porch and her face fell. She sincerely felt sorry for anyone that lived here. Trash bags piled as high as the door, holes in the rotting wood making it almost impossible to walk around, and the smell coming from the house was a putrid. Hoping with her entire being that she wouldn't fall through the porch, she gingerly made her way up the steps and opened the screen door.
The knock seemed empty, hollow and meaningless against the battered wooden door of the home. The sun shined down on the decrepit house, and she knew it was probably riddled with mold and insects inside. She ran a paw through her tail thinking about the nice shower in the hotel room. I hope I can get the smell of tobacco out of my fur... I can smell it from outside. It was the smell of her past. Despair, tobacco, filth, and defeat. She couldn't stand it. The crushing reality of her former life was sinking in. Her body screaming to leave and never look back; her mind and soul needing to go forward. The red furred woman knew that she couldn't turn back now. It was time to finish this once and for all. The weight of her past needed to be buried. These demons needed to be addressed and dealt with. The door creaked, cracking open only slightly to reveal its inhabitant. Foxy put on a fake smile, forcing her tail not to tuck as she gazed on the one person she wished she could forget.
"Is it really you?" The voice was cracked, rough and wheezy. It belonged to a scruffy looking fox, a vixen that would have been beautiful twenty years ago. White fur tinged yellow, as if it hadn't been thoroughly washed in months. The smell of decay and tobacco mixed with what Foxy assumed was food cooking in the background, as well as the old and poorly groomed fox in front of her.
"Yes mom, and we need to talk."