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He sat atop the rough and uncomfortable hospital bed as he stared at the piece of paper in his quaking hands. Positive. The fur on his back started to rise as his eyes glanced across the word every gay fox in the 1980's dreaded. Ricky was HIV Positive. With his heart beating out of his chest, he let out a deep sigh filled with anxiety.

"Would you like a minute, Mr. Jones?", the doctor said.

"No I'm fine. I'll have plenty of time alone in the near future so I might as well spend as much time in company as possible.", Ricky replied angrily.

"Very well. This does not mean it's the end of the road for you, Ricky. There are medical advancements every day for the disease, as well as ways to keep your immune system strong."

"Thank you doctor, but I wish to either live or die. I do not want to prolong my death by a year, I would rather die on my terms."

"That is perfectly understandable. I wish you the best, and hope you live your life to the fullest."

"I always have. I can honestly say that I will make no change in my daily life when I wake up tomorrow, as my life has been lived perfectly as of yet. I think it is best if I get home and call my family."

"Call me if you need anything. I am always here to help."

Ricky walked out the door to a crowd of other residents and guests of the hospital. As he strolled to his car, his eyes washed over everyone he passed. Almost everyone here was injured in some way, whether it was physical, mental, or because one of their loved ones was hurt. His face soon had streams of delicate tears darkening his fur. Seeing all of their faces with the knowledge that he will never see them again was saddening. But not because they will be gone, but because he will be gone. Everything changed for him once he received the news that he was positive. He saw the world through a more permanent lens knowing that he was temporary, and that the world would not stop for him. He stumbled to the door of his car and tried to find his key amongst the others on his keyring, all the while his hands were severely shaking making it even more arduous for him.

"Here, let me help you with that.", a mysterious wolf said as he walked up to Ricky. He took the keys from his hands and unlocked the car for him. He was wearing a burgundy blazer and a lime green button-down shirt underneath. He held himself well, clearly having an ego that he was trying to hide. Underneath his bright clothes was a fur coat black as night, with a soul to match perfectly.

"Excuse me? And you are who, exactly?", asked Ricky.

"I could see you were having a bit of trouble and I decided to help out. Seems like you got some bad news. Most people do when coming out of that hellhole they call a hospital.", the man said.

"Yes, well I found out I'm positive. Not exactly used to it yet."

"You never get used to it, I'm afraid. I'm Jonathan."

"Nice to meet you Jonathan. I'm Ricky. I still don't exactly understand why a complete stranger such as yourself decided to talk to me."

"I was diagnosed a few years ago, and ever since then I walk through this parking lot searching for people who need a helping hand."

"That's very kind of you. I am sure you have brightened up many people's days."

"We have to look out for each other. Being positive is horrible within itself, but knowing you are positive without knowing when you are going to go is treacherous, to say the least."

"To be completely honest I don't care about when I am going to go. All I care about is living out the rest of my life as painless as possible."

"Most people in this world will hold on until their very last breath despite being bedridden and hooked up to a morphine drip. That's no way to live in my eyes. I was about to go walk around outside the hospital, did you want to tag along? You know, for being a building filled with death and disease, the walk to the hospital is quite pretty; Not too many of us live to appreciate it."

Ricky hesitated, not sure if leaving with this strange man was a good idea, but he quickly agreed and went with his gut.

Ricky and Jonathan left the parking lot and walked down the sidewalk outside the hospital. In between the path and the medical building was a beautiful green meadow filled with flowers of all colors. Vibrant blues and yellows mixed in with the deep red to create a breathtaking landscape, which was ironically suitable given the hospital was also breathtaking. After discussing the disease and it's implications for an hour as they paced the hospital, Ricky and Jonathan sat down on a bench they stumbled upon.

"It's not easy.", Jonathan said. "You will find that this disease will kill you, slowly but surely. The pharmaceutical companies are working on cures, but at this rate they won't be released until years after we are long gone."

"I expect no less. It is what I deserve though, that's for sure. I shouldn't have been such a slut, fucking every fox in sight, being they had a dick of course. Well, I guess that lifestyle's over.", Ricky said. You could see small tear drops falling from his eyes as he spoke, darkening the cement between his feet.

Jonathan looked at Ricky and took off his sunglasses as he let out a sigh of anxiety. "Ricky, I haven't exactly been honest with you."

"What do you mean?"

"I am not the person you think I am. Well, at least there are parts of my life that haven't been shared."

"I don't think I follow. Did you lie about having the disease or something?"

Jonathan put his paw on the ground and picked up a spider. "Oh no, of course I do. But it cannot kill me." Jonathan looked at Ricky as he held the spider at in his hand at chest level. "Spiders are magnificent creatures, Ricky. Have you ever heard of a black widow?"

"Yes, they are extremely poisonous. That's all I know about them though."

"Well, the Black Widow is one of the most fascinating spiders on the planet. They are known for their venom and it's severity to us, but that isn't the most astonishing fact about them. You see, all of the black widow's with venom are actually female. A widow mates with a male, and once the eggs are laid the female spider kills the male spider. When the children are born, they eat the father as their first meal. See, that is why the female is called the Black Widow, because she kills her mate and feeds him to the children."

"Well, that's oddly gruesome. But the question still remains as to why you are telling me this?"

"My name is Jonathan, but I am also known as the Black Widower. When I first started having sex, I noticed something odd. Every person I fucked ended up dying exactly one day after I came inside them. I unfortunately learned this through my boyfriend at the time. After I realized just what power this was, I decided to use it to help people. I find terminally ill HIV/AIDS patients and offer to give them the fuck of their lives, which will in turn end it as well."

"No, that can't be true. How the hell does that happen?"

"If I knew, I would tell you. It doesn't matter to me if you believe me. The fact of the matter is that I have it."

"Well, Mr. Black Widower,", Ricky said as he chuckled out of pity for him, "I will leave you to find another helpless soul to leech onto. If you excuse me, I have to go home and call my loved ones and plan my funeral.", he said sarcastically.

"If that's what you want to do, so be it.", he said as he handed Ricky a card with his phone number on it. "But if you change your mind, give me a call, or stop by my place. The address is on the back."

Jonathan began to walk back to the parking lot, leaving Ricky confused and staring at him until he disappeared out of his visibility. Ricky continued to sit at the bench for another hour as he thought about Jonathan and what he said. He felt as if this mysterious wolf has mocked his disease and made a joke of him. Aggravation and sadness filled his mind as he tried to understand what could have provoked someone to say such things. After calming down, Ricky walked to his car and drove home to an empty house. As he was driving home, the bright sun was quickly covered with ominous black clouds leading to pelting rain. Once Ricky stepped out of his car in his driveway, the rain covered his beige blazer and corduroy pants, making them many shades darker and many pounds heavier. Tears flowed from Ricky's eyes once more as he knelt to the floor and screamed at the sky. The rain from his eyes was disguised inside the rain from the clouds, giving him the freedom to sob until no more water could exit his body.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?!", Ricky yelled. "I tried! I tried to be normal! You say being gay is a sin, yet no matter how hard I tried, no matter how hard I was hit, I couldn't fix it! I was just beginning to live my life accepting who I was, and you had to come back and punish me! Fine. I guess you win. You can have my unclean soul. Just take it!", he yelled as he hit his chest towards the sky. "Take my life, you heartless bastard! I'm right here!". He sat there sobbing for five minutes hearing nothing but the rain hitting the pavement. "No. Of course not. That would be too easy for you to do, right? Maybe you want to keep me alive just long enough for me to realize what I did wrong. Well, let me tell you something, God. I am fucking done believing in you, and I will never believe I did anything wrong. I would rather live forty more years in a hospital bed than to lie to you! So take your prophets and your gospel and shove it up your ass! Who knows? You might like how it feels!"

After Ricky calmed down, he walked through the front door of his home to see that his whole world, even his house, has changed. He slowly paced towards the bathroom and looked in the mirror to see a distraught and disturbed young wolf. The whole world hasn't changed, it is him who has changed. He reached into his pocket to pull out the card with Jonathan's phone number on it. He picked up his phone in the living room and dialed the number to hear the familiar voice of Jonathan on the other end.

"I see you reconsidered.", Jonathan said before Ricky was able to get a word in. "Stop by my place whenever you are ready. Please take your time, and I look forward to seeing you. Goodbye, Ricky."

Ricky sat on the couch in his apartment and let out a sigh of relief. He has never felt more free in his life.