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As music boomed down the hallway, cheers rising from the Common Room; she spun into the bedroom with him, and closed the door firmly behind them.

"Okay, I'm ready," She breathed anxiously, "I'm ready."

Before he could ask what she was ready for, she dropped her birdy skirts to the floor.

Liam's eyes went wide, "I know I said I liked you, but I didn't mean I was ready for..."

Maggie put a wing to the raven's mouth, "It's not what you think. I think I'm about to lay an egg."

Liam's eyes went even wider, trying not to glance down at her, knowing full well how that was about to happen, "And how does this involve me?"

The Magpie looked around anxiously, her whitened leg feathers feeling exposed in the open bedroom air, "This is my first time, and I've seen the podcasts you make, so I hoped you could help me."

Liam went red beneath his dark feathers, "Wait, you know of my podcasts? But I didn't think anyone I actually knew..."

"It's a weird obsession you have, I admit, your abnormal obsession with female..." She looked down at her feathery legs, awkwardly, "But anyway, I thought you might be the only one able to help me."

"I do discussions of gravid birds laying eggs, that doesn't mean I'm actually prepared to witness it happening first-wing!"

"Please," she said, "I've never done this before, I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing. You, on the other wing, do. Plus, I really, really think I like you."

Liam looked at her, feeling a bit flattered, but at the same time, overwhelmed, considering what she was wearing (or the lack thereof). Finally, "There's not much you do do, you find a place, you lay an egg, and you're done." She didn't look assured. He looked at the clock, thinking of all the fraternal bonding he was missing from the party downstairs, but then he looked at Maggie and sighed, "But I suppose it shouldn't hurt to give moral support." Besides, here was a girl about to lay an egg, so how cool was that?

Maggie seemed to relax a little at that. "Please tell me it doesn't hurt as bad as they say."

Liam could only shake his head, "You want the truth?"

Maggie felt her heart sink, realizing there wouldn't be any reassurance here, but she nodded anyway.

"It hurts, it hurts really bad. Magpies have relativity small eggs in relation to body size compared to some other birds, but you never want to underestimate how bad such a small thing can be; you're going to be wishing you were dead for a little awhile."

Maggie lost it. "You mean to tell me that the only way to not experience a life worse than death is to not be female?!"

Liam flinched, "Or to not ever lay an egg." ... "Which is something I believe to be virtually impossible for a female," he admitted regrettably.

"Okay, I can handle this, I can handle this," Maggie said, panting heavily as she turned her back on him.

"No, actually you can't," Liam said, "But you will make it through it. There's a difference."

She glared back at him.

"Sorry, not helping," he said. "Point is, I can't promise you it's not going to get bad, because it will, but you'll make it through it, and since I'm here, I might as well try to help in any way that I can."

"You're going to enjoy every moment of this," Maggie said bitterly.

"It's a morbid fascination of mine, yes," Liam admitted, "But it's one thing to read a story of such a thing happening to an unprepared female, and another to see it happen to them first-wing, pain is so much more easy to process when you don't actually have to see it happen in real-time."

"Might as well get ready," Maggie said, grabbing a couple pillows from her bed and throwing them on the floor for a makeshift nest, then bent down and threw her tailfeathers up behind her, "is this a good position?" She asked. She grabbed the rest of her school uniform with her wing and pulled it off, "Is it hot in here, or is that just me?"

Well, now she felt even more exposed, but she was here with a feminine body dealing with feminine circumstances, so there was point in hiding it; guess that was just her reward for daring to be female in a world half full of males. Lucky her.

Liam was trying not to blush at the sight of her looking like that, school uniforms and other outerwear were a fairly new trend for birds considering the complexity of creating a suitable fit for the avian shape, but seeing Maggie full with her black and white feathers that his generation wasn't used to seeing, the blue of her wings reflecting softly in the light, he couldn't help but feel himself awkward; all that was left over to cover her was the flower ribbon she had pinned on her head that some of the other students liked to wear.

Liam regained himself, returning to the question at wing, "Whatever position makes you comfortable. You'll be writhing alot, so I wouldn't worry about getting too set in your ways."

"Good to know," Maggie said, still self-conscious of having a male here seeing her like this. At least he was a cute male, she hoped he was getting quite the view. "I hope you take some notes on some of the features we females have from just from being female."

"It's kind of ironic actually," Liam mused, "because you'd think that females are too proper to be capable of experiencing pain, but in fact it's the complete opposite."

"Yeah, pain, completely unheard of," Maggie said, rolling her eyes. She just hoped it wasn't going to be too bad.

Suddenly, she winced.

"What did you feel?" Liam asked, catching the expression.

"Well, I'm not sure," Maggie said, "But I think..." She trailed off.

"Maggie, do you swear?"

Maggie looked suddenly indignant, "Why I'd never-"

And then the first contraction hit, sharp and painful.

"#$&*!" Maggie squawked, her wings throwing up feathers around her.

In an instant, Maggie's wing flew to her mouth in horror, "I said I'd never use such words," She gasped.

"Don't worry," Liam assured her, "Happens to all hens. Never fails actually."

Maggie felt offended, "What you mean to tell me is there is not a single female out there who will not swear under any reason?!"

But Liam could see the movement in her abdomen, a clear indication of what was coming. "Get ready," He said.

Maggie's eyes only had a moment to widen when-

CONTRACTION!

CONTRACTION!

CONTRACTION!

"#$&*! #$&*y, #$&* #$&*!" Maggie shrieked.

"Now the real pain begins," Liam said grimly.

Maggie's eyes went wide as suddenly, a whole ton of contractions hit her all at once, in an instant, she was shrieking and screaming, and wishing she was dead, using every single swear word she knew. Liam winced, he'd done a lot of research on the subject, but he'd never had any idea what it actually must feel like.

"PAIN!" Maggie wailed into the sky, "PAIN!"

The fact was wrong, Liam was no Egg Laying Expert, because there was no way Liam could've fathomed the pain she'd be going trough as she felt her innards be practically lacerated inside her. The only thing that could make this pain any bit reasonable was death! All her life, how had it all led to this!? How had any of it been worth it if her entire life had been leading toward resulting in this.

Liam could only watch as Maggie writhed on the floor, feeling completely strange at this separation between them; he knew she was in obvious pain, but for him the world was proceeding as normal, for her, that pain, at least from the testimonies he'd heard of those who had gone before her- that was her everything. One thing he was for sure of, her screams were certainly going to draw the attention of the party goers downstairs. He'd have to do something about that.

"I'll be right back," Liam said quickly.

Liam rushed out of the room, making sure to keep the door open for the shortest amount of time possible, and flew down the hallway to the elevated balcony overlooking the common area. Music was booming from loudspeakers, as frats and soros danced and flapped in the flashy lights of the party of a lifetime.

Liam flew over to the DJ and grabbed the microphone, "Why's it so quiet in here?" He called, "Where's all the noise!"

Then Liam cranked up the music as loud as it could possibly go. The ravens, crows, and magpies all cheered loudly, partying bigger than ever.

That should drown out Maggie's screams.

Liam flew back down the hallway, and reentered Maggie's room. The music still boomed from the hallway, but it was muffled through the thickness of the walls so that it shouldn't cause too much of a distraction.

"Why did you leave me!" She cried, her eyes bleary with pain. The contractions must have slowed somewhat, because she was able to speak in full sentences.

"Sorry," Liam said, "Was just making sure nobody heard you. Don't want to embarrass you more than you have to be."

"Well, I'm already embarrassed," Maggie said, "Deal with it!"

And then contractions increased again, sending her into another fit of unfathomable screaming.

Misuse of logic. Not uncommon during most layings.

Liam felt himself growing awkward. He prided himself in his use of logic, he couldn't imagine circumstances taking that away from him just because he was having some female issues. Seeing a girl being made unable to act in the way he knew so well just went to show how little control gravids had over their own selves during these types of situations.

This girls' struggles really weren't doing well for his maleness, he realized; females had a tendency to make guys feel something, and being this close to a girl experiencing such a unique female experience was really making him feel things.

And as much as this girl was screaming, she was clearly experiencing this female experience like no other. With all he knew about laying, he found it hard to believe this girl could handle being in as much pain as she was supposedly supposed to be in.

"So, um, when you say pain, like, do you mean something you can manage if you focus on something else, or is it really, that bad?"

"I mean, I NO LONGER FEEL I CAN BEAR TO EXIST IN MY OWN BODY!" She screamed, trying to writhe every which way out of it to no avail.

Now that DID make him feel alot. If he had been female, he would be going through the same exact thing she was, and that, he couldn't even imagine. Was it true that males and females were that different that he couldn't even fathom a simple staple part of the others' existence? He'd been with female birds every day, in classes, around his family, and they'd never felt that different from him, but realizing how much pain that was beyond his normal comprehension that females went through on a fairly regular basis, he couldn't help but see how different they really were.

Suddenly, Maggie's eyes went wide: that felt weird.

"How far is it going?" She managed, throwing up her tail and extending her tailfeathers as she looked back for a better view; Liam flushed.

Liam took a second to process, then looked at Maggie, uncomfortable, "In a moment, you're going going to feel an unbelievable explosion of pain, and you're probably going to temporarily lose all conscious thought of anything but." He told her.

"WHA-"

And then it hit, Maggie shrieked and squawked, and threw out any swear you could imagine.

And then an egg plopped out right behind her.

"AN EGG JUST CAME OUT!" She shrieked painfully, feathers flapping everywhere, "AN EGG JUST CAME OUT OF MY FEMALE PLACE!" Then, she slumped her head on the pillows of her pillownest out in front of her.

"You okay," Liam asked, already there, holding a glass of water in front of her. She looked up and took it, drinking gratefully.

"Yeah," she sighed unenthusiastically, "Just glad that's over."

Liam's eyes went wide, "Oh no, Magpies seldom lay just one egg at a time, you've only just started."

Maggie looked at him, suddenly feeling frantic, "That wasn't all!"

Liam shook his head.

"How many am I going to lay then!?"

Liam thought for a moment, trying to remember, "Well, for most magpies, a clutch consists of around 5 to 8, more or less, but sometimes more."

"5 to 8!" Maggie cried. But in that instant, her eyes widened as she felt it coming on again, "Oh no you don'-!"

CONTRACTIONS!

Maggie shrieked upward, her whole body jerking in pain, "#$&*!" She screamed, "#$&*y, #$&* #$&*!" She shoved her rear up in the air, but nothing happened, then dropped it down again, more contractions, repeat, deafening scream.

When it slowed down just enough, Maggie looked over at Liam, glaring.

"I hope you're enjoying this," Maggie managed through the pain, "Because if you're not, I'm going to feel like my time has been completely wasted, because I'm certainly not enjoying it."

"Well, normally I would," Liam said, just standing there, watching the show awkwardly, "But I've never been this up close and personal to anything like this before, so forgive me if this feels a little different. Not a bad different par-say, but I'm still adjusting."

Maggie gave an exasperated sigh, "Stuck here laying my eggs with a guy who has a morbid fascination with my personal lady issues."

"Well, I wouldn't say it's you personally," Liam said defensively, "any female capable of laying eggs and enduring these amounts of pain- which is basically all of them..." He trailed off.

"Well that makes me feel a lot better," Maggie said before, "Oh wait, oh wait, no, no, noooooooooooooooooo!"

And she was screaming again. The pain must've been inconceivable, even for her.

For Liam's part, he felt bad for the fascination he had felt in this, seeing her like this. To be fair, it was fascinating to know every female went through this, but to actually see what every female had to go through, and to know that Maggie had to go through it right now, he couldn't bear to imagine the angst so many female birds must feel simply by knowing what being born a female bird must entail. Of course he was glad it wasn't him, but it could've so easily been him if he had simply been hatched a little different; Maggie had been hatched a little different, and now look what she was going through. Certainly he was glad it wasn't him, but he wasn't sure he was glad it was Maggie either. Was he fascinated? Maybe, but if giving up his fascination could spare Maggie any of this, he was sure he could make do with being a little less fascinated. It wasn't like this wouldn't have happened anyway, did it hurt to get something out of it? But sometimes it was hard to choose what you were into and what you weren't. He didn't exactly ask to be here, he was trying to handle this as politely as he could.

Life had been so much easier when it had just been nameless commentators in questionable discussion threads online, that was certain.

And then, a moment later, Maggie's second egg was laid with a bloodcurdling scream.

When Maggie was finally able to look back at Liam, his face read everything, fascination, but still a little bit shy about it.

"Okay, pray tell," Maggie said in mild exasperation, but curiosity more than anything, "what is it that you find so fascinating about this?"

Liam looked at her, "You really want to know? It's a bit to unpack."

"Well, I got the time," Maggie said, full knowledge of the long night she had ahead of her. "But it better be good, I'm the one being embarrassed here, so the least you can do is embarrass me properly.

"You might want to hold off a minute," Liam said, noticing the movement in her belly, "You might want to brace yourself.

Maggie's eyes went wide, "Wha-!"

And then she was screaming again to the rhythm of contractions.

And it hurt, it hurt r_eally_ bad.

"WHY ME! WHY ME!" She wailed, throwing her wings over her eyes as she threw up her tailfeathers behind her, as if she couldn't bear to face the reality of the world, right before bursting out screaming again.

Okay, this time, Liam simply couldn't contain himself.

"Well, as you know, female bodies are naturally tendent at producing eggs; once a shell has been calcified, all that's left is to lay it, which is exactly what you're going through right now."

"UGHHHH! MY FEMALE PLACE! WHY MUST IT ALWAYS BE MY FEMALE PLACE!"

Maggie felt hot in the face, all her female problems which she had just had to accept as part of her normal day to day were now being presented full display to this handsome male raven who, free of all messed up workabouts of how her body worked, could see without bias how truly messed up those workabouts were, and she got the privilege of feeling the full embarrassment of it through her pain.

"Well, that's just how it works," Liam said, "a female's body is quite unique and mysterious that way compared to us males; it is capable of doing things and forming things no other type of body possibly could."

Maggie glared at him, her contractions calming ever so. "This is my body, it's the normalest thing there could possibly be." Then contractions hit again "OKAY! IT'S NOT NORMAL! IT'S SO NOT NORMAL! THIS IS THE MOST ABNORMAL THING ANYBODY COULD POSSIBLY HAVE! UGHHH! I HATE MY FEMALE PLACE!"

Liam looked personally offended.

"Don't say that, you females have really awesome... Places. I mean sure it's not really dignified, and I know how many of you pride yourself in your dignity- which is apparent you've all but lost at this point..." Maggie glared at him. "Okay, I'll quit talking. Point is, you girls are awesome, so surely it must be awesome to be one."

"Well, I'm so glad you can take so much joy out of me being female. If being female is awesome, why must this happen to EVERY SINGLE FEMALE!?" She screamed as contractions picked up again.

"Admittedly, it looks bad... okay, it probably feels bad too," Liam admitted, "But just think, being female means you get to experience sensations that males couldn't even begin to imagine; that everything normal can be completely shattered simply by being part of that other that we consider our one of our own."

"THIS IS NOT HAPPENING TO SOME ALIEN ENTITY YOU CANNOT COMPREHEND!" Maggie squealed, "THIS IS HAPPENING TO ME!"

And then Maggie screamed again, and there was her third egg.

"And that's exactly what I'm saying, you aren't any different than us males, but at the same time you are, I could never go through what you're going through, yet I can relate to your personhood regardless- you girls are so awesome."

"If this is relating to my personhood, you are sure doing a lousy job of showing it!" Maggie moaned.

"Yeah, I'll take that," Liam nodded nobly, "I'm just having a really hard time not geeking out right now, this is what I do podcasts about you know. Now, can I get you anything? More water? Something to drink? Those are pretty much the same thing..."

Maggie rolled her eyes, at least at this place between eggs, her pain had calmed down just enough for the moment she could almost find his eccentricities a little endearing. If also not the worst bedside manner she could've possibly done with. Why had she asked for this by bringing him in here?

Liam came back a moment later with her glass of water and something to drink, and Maggie took the cup, sipping at it greedily.

When she was done, she pulled the glass from her beak, still panting from the exertion. Death may have been the only relief from the agony she just endured, but at least some water was close to half as good. Maybe a quarter. Okay, no, it came close to making anything she had just felt alright, but at least it was hydrating. After bearing so much unfathomable torture, it was a miracle she was even had the sanity left to carry on a fairly normal conversation, how had she managed to forget it so quickly? By all logic, she should be an irreparable mess. Her mind had to be suppressing the worst of it, but what she'd went through at least to some degree, and it could happen again.

"I can't do it anymore," she said, "I can't lay any more of these eggs."

"Which is basically what every female has said ever." Liam said matter-of-factly, "But it won't be any different than then any eggs that any other bird has laid, and it seems it's been no different for you so far."

Maggie's eyes went wide as she realized, "But it's impossible! No bird could've taken that kind of pain! But I already have! And if it happened in the past, that means it can happen in the..."

Liam nodded knowingly, and Maggie began to feel herself panicking.

Okay, she'd get herself under control, it wasn't like laying eggs hurt or anything. At least it wasn't making her look stupid in front of a nice looking guy. Oh wait, it was. There was some positivity right there.

"So stupid," Maggie grumbled to herself. Then to Liam, "Go ahead, tell me, I might as well know if you find all my misfortune in real life is as entertaining for you as you make it sound in your podcasts?"

"Well," Liam started, flushing, "If I'm being honest, as far as your circumstance... I'm kind of having a hard time hanging through this myself," he shifted slightly as he stood awkwardly there on his feet.

Maggie came to a stop, her eyes narrowing at him. She glanced him up and down as she realized his predicament. Finally, she picked up one of her pillows, a colorful one with pink and blue swirls like cotton candy, and tossed it in his direction. "Here, have this. But if you're gonna do something freaky with it, please do it on the other side of the bed so I don't have to see it; I'm not ready for that. I'll incinerate it after tonight."

Liam looked at the pillow a moment, "You don't have to do that," he said, "I can hold it if I have to." He paused, testing the pillow with his talons. Finally, he picked it up quickly, "But I think I'm going to hang onto this just in case." He didn't think he was going to make it through tonight, but he hoped he could find a solution a little more discreet. He could always do laundry if need be, though perhaps next time, he'd have thought better to bring a diaper. He certainly hoped he wasn't being too disrespectful.

Maggie's face burned. How had she gotten here? Her basic bodily functions making a guy feel this way. It was so embarrassing, she almost thought she'd have needed a pillow of her own if she wasn't having her own share of problems at the moment. At least someone was having fun here tonight. She covered her face and instead just said shamefully, "Just tell me where we are right now." How could any being, much least herself, actually be experiencing pain such as this. She would've thought she was dreaming if she hadn't known there was no way she could've dreamed up this much pain.

Liam glanced at her stomach, looking for any movement, trying to get a sense of the situation.

"I hope you're ready for more, because it seems the next one is about to come. You know, I'm kind of looking forward to it," he glanced at Maggie, "My apologies."

"No offense taken," Maggie said plainly, dreading what was about to become of her. It's not like he had to know what this felt like. "Well, I hope you enjoy my piercing screams, because it seems I am about to-" CONTRACTION! "START SCREAMING! #$&*!" And then she was screaming again.

Wow, on her fourth egg, and no signs of letting up. There seemed no way she could've made it through her first egg, yet here she was, on her forth. Liam couldn't even begin to imagine.

Maggie screamed, threw her tailfeathers up, literally felt like her innards were lacerating, she screamed all the more, cursed and wished for death; wow, it just kept going, how could she take all of this?

"I really want to know," Liam said, "how do you keep going at it? Being in what must be unbelievable agony for what must feel an unimaginable amount of time?"

"YOU THINK I CHOOSE TO KEEP GOING AT IT? I'D RATHER DIE!" She screamed. And then she was just screaming again.

"And that's the point, your endurance must be phenomenal, pain worse than death, yet here you still are," Liam said.

And then Maggie let out another piercing scream, and that was her 4th egg.

"You think I have strong endurance!" Maggie laughed, once she had recovered, "Why do you think I keep cutting gym class?"

Liam looked at her, "Oh... wow... Well, you really mustn't be able to take this then..."

Liam was trying to process this.

"How many more eggs did you say I was going to have again?" Maggie moaned "3? 5?"

"Well, I was kind of hoping you'd be in for the full 8, but now I'm wondering how you'll even manage 5." He thought for a moment, "I think 7 would even it out satisfactorily."

Maggie looked at him.

"What? I think this whole experience has been quite fascinating, if you only want to have 5, only have 5."

"Well yeah, I think I have much choice over that, just like I had the choice to lay these eggs in the First Place."

"Actually, you probably didn't, female birds have a tendency to lay eggs irregardless of fertilization, at varying frequencies depending on the species. Be glad you're not a chicken. Or a kiwi, those things are big."

"I know!" Maggie said, "Can't you detect sarcasm?"

"I can, I just had to say it."

Maggie looked at him, "Why do I keep you here?"

"I do not know, at times, I feel I'm being a bit too much, but it's really hard to contain myself. I really don't wish you this kind of pain, but at the same time..."

"Well, wish it or not, because you're in luck," Maggie said, growing frantic again, "Because it's happening anywa-"

And then the contractions began again.

Maggie was screaming, writhing, throwing her rear end in the air and screaming some more, and throwing it down again, feathers flying everywhere.

But at the same time... I was kind of cool. Liam could almost imagine her boppin' to the music coming from the party down the hallway even if inside the room her screams drowned out most of it and overall overrode the illusion of livelihood altogether. Still Liam had temptation to throw in some of his own moves, not with the pillow of course, though that was a consideration.

"Yeah, you go girl!" Liam said, giving his own tail feathers a shake.

"I hate you!" Maggie said, though the better half of her was forced to admit he had some moves.

But the better half was forced to wait as the contractions shot through her bad again, and she was forced to shoot her rear higher and higher in her fit of uncontrollable screaming. Liam, she knew, was sure to get an interesting view; well $&#%ing good for him!

"MY ^$&*@!" She screamed, "MY ^$&*@!"

Okay, Liam was really tempted to incorporate that pillow into his moves now. Maggie was making no secret as to what she had down there, and she was probably in too much pain to realize she was doing it anymore.

It was after the fifth egg, in the silence that was only filled by the muffled music from the party down the hallway - feeling herself shaky from the sudden chill of the room adding on from her exhaust - that the full reality of her predicament finally hit her.

"Oh my gosh, it just hit me how embarrassing this has all been," Maggie moaned, throwing her wings down over herself, to cover her lower bit, pulling around some of her surrounding pillows in front of her to help. Oh gosh, it was already long past the point of no return, wasn't it? This boy had seen all of it. "I've been writhing and screaming, and making myself a complete fool, while I've had eggs coming out of my..." She looked back at herself, her rear feathers still fully extending, giving a full view, "Oh!" She moaned, "And you've been here watching the whole time."

"I have," Liam said.

"And I'm female," Maggie moaned.

"Yeah, we've kind of already established that," Liam said.

"But I'm really female," Maggie said, "Complete with all the female workabouts and... You literally know everything about that, don't you?"

"For the most part," Liam admitted, "This is the first time knowing it all in such detail though.

Maggie buried her face in her chest-fluff full of embarrassment, her wings still holding a pillow down tight in front of her to keep herself covered. Ironically, the way her body folded in to cover itself only went further to emphasize what she was trying to hide, and she didn't know what to do about that; what else could she do? "For all that female modesty, I can't believe us girls still have..." She moaned out her embarrassment, giving up. "At least tell me, for a female, am I at least attractive...?"

"Attractive? I don't know if you know this, but it's pretty hard for a female to not be attractive, especially when they have tailfeathers as fluffy as yours, and also, you know, the other stuff."

"Of course," Maggie said, deflated into her self-consciousness. "Am I even a person at this point?"

Liam stopped himself, realizing he might have finally went a step too for. Lost in thought a moment, finally-

"Listen," he said, taking a step toward her, gently restraightening the flower-pin on her head which had gotten rattled from all the flopping, "I don't mean to make you feel like you're not a person, and I'm sorry if that's how I come off. I know I'm getting a bit carried away by all this, and honestly, I'm getting mixed signals from you whether that's okay with you..." He took a breath and cleared his throat, "I see you as a person, but sometimes our bodies can seem... otherworldly, and I guess that's what's fascinating to me, seeing how our personhood reacts to those seemingly otherworldly things that are out of our control. I know you feel awkward, I'd feel awkward too if I was in your situation; I can't help but wonder what that must feel like, and maybe that's why I go at it like I do, because I know that whatever I can't feel, maybe you can feel it in my place. I can't control how I feel, but if you want me to back it down a little, I will certainly try."

Maggie still had her face buried in her feathers and the pillows in front of her. "No, I'm just processing, okay, being female is a lot, you have no idea. Not even you can process it, and you're not even one. Perhaps at least you can make some sense of it."

"Make sense of it?" Liam asked, "I think you underestimate yourself."

Maggie looked at him a second, "You're right, you could never understand what it's like to be a girl like me in a billion years, but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop screaming and acting like a complete bonker until I make you understand. I will make you understand, no matter how biologically impossible that may be."

"Well, I accept the challenge," Liam said with a playful smirk.

Oh, why did Maggie like the big doofus so much?

Liam was looking at the eggs laying in the makeshift nest behind her, considering, "So you've been quiet for awhile. That's five already, what are you feeling? Does it feel like you're done?"

Maggie felt herself, and in an instant, her face fell, "You'll be pleased to know..." She gulped, "This is going to hurt."

"You probably don't think you can take it anymore, do you?"

Maggie shook her head.

"I wish I could say I'm sorry, but..."

"Yeah yeah yeah, I know. 'But I'm going to go through it anyway.'"

"But I can say that I'm sorry I'm not more sorry. Now, perhaps you should get ready to brace yourself. Man I'm lucky I'm not you."

Then it hit Maggie all over again, and she realized the unimaginable pain she was was about to go under as it felt itself starting to build."

"Wait wait wait! No! I can't take this anymore!"

"Honestly, I really hope this egg exceeds all your expectations," Liam said.

Maggie gave him a scornful look, like s_eriously!?_

But she was too distracted with the panic setting in. She was s_o_ not ready.

Then...

CONTRACTIONS!

Maggie threw her beak up into the air and screamed.

"JUST LET ME DIE!!!!!"

Yep, Liam was past the point of holding back, all he could do is hope that some future Maggie wouldn't hold it against him too hard.

"Oh come on," he said, "that'd take away all the fun."

"I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!"

And she was right, she was utterly spent from the last five eggs, and there was nothing left for... well any of the five of the previous ones, much less this six one. But wasn't that the point? Just because she couldn't take it didn't mean she wouldn't. Wow, being her must truly be miserable.

But of course, if she could take it, it wouldn't have been quite the same. The female's inability to bear, yet the inevitability of bearing through to the end of it anyway was a paradoxical irony that never ceases to amuse, especially when it happened to one so present as Maggie; Liam tried not to hope there would be a seventh egg somewhere in there, but secretly, how could he not?

Wow, I really am a sadistic monster, Liam thought. If him and Maggie became a thing, hopefully there was a therapy for that.

Maggie screamed uncontrollably, she squirmed and writhed, like her innards had been trapped within a torture device which could only escape by writing free of her inner body. She screamed, screamed some more, so much pain, Liam - a male - could almost feel it himself. He was glad he wasn't though, that unique experience was for her; Somebody had to enjoy it afterall, and it certainly wasn't going to be her.

"HELP!" She screamed, "HELP ME JUST DIE- AHHHHHHHHHH!" She lifted her head into the air again and gave a pure guttural wail.

Yep, she was in pain.

...

A lot of pain.

Seemingly even more so than...

It was this that Liam noticed something, "Wait, compared to your other eggs... how does this one compare?"

"THIS IS THE WORST %&*#ING PAIN I'VE EVER BEEN IN!" She screamed, totally not caring how filthy her mouth felt at the use of that horrible word. "I HATE LIFE! I %&*#ING HATE LIFE! %&*# %&*# %&*# %&*# %&*#!" She screamed the word as many times as she could before the contractions overtook her sanity once again.

Liam winced, perhaps it was recency bias, but something seemed different this time.

"Listen, I don't want to alarm you," he said, "But I have a feeling this egg is going to be just a bit bigger than the others. You might want to brace yourself."

"BIGGER THAN THE OTHERS!? YOU THINK I DON'T ALREADY KNOW IT! OF COURSE ITS BIGGER THAN THE OTHERS! %&*#!" She hated her mouth right now, hated having her freedom of clean speech taken away from her; that's just the way it was for girls, wasn't it. But as much hatred as she had for her mouth, it helped to hate, to hate as much as she hated her own existence right now.

"I HATE MY LIFE!" She screamed again, "I HATE MY %&*#ING LIFE!"

As the larger than normal egg forced its way through her unprotected body, she forced her bottom up into the air, slamming it down again with horrific screaming, throwing her tailfeathers all over the place. She tried to scream of pain, to scream again, but there was only so much you could do to articulate pain, and soon words themselves run out, but the agony does not. She kept screaming and screaming with indescribable torture, torture that felt like it could force her body in two, but yet it didn't; her body would force itself to stretch and bend however much necessary to lay this egg, beyond anything that was natural if need be, and there was nothing she could do about it except be forced to experience every single second of it.

Then, abruptly, her body stopped. "Oh-no!" she said, "Please don't, Please dO-" But instead of giving her the mercy she so desperately needed, the pain just increased, forcing her into another horrific scream!

It hurt, it hurt really bad; it hurt beyond bad, she screamed as words continued to fail her, her bottom hammered up and down. "PLEASE!" she screamed, pure misery "JUST PLEASE MAKE IT END!"

"I can't, I don't know how," Liam said, regretfully; even he was starting to feel bad about the situation at this point. Only a little of course.

"GIVE ME A KNIFE! She screamed, hatred for her own existence overflowing her. "JUST GIVE ME A KNIFE AND I'LL CUT THE #$&*ING THING OUT RIGHT NOW!"

Liam flinched at the thought of her cutting herself open that way, more painful than he could imagine it being. But she wasn't joking. How much more pain must she be in if she was in a state of willingness to do that to herself without hesitation? But of course she was in that much pain, she was a female laying an egg; he could feel himself flinching, the beginnings of the realization of just how much more real her pain must be than he ever could've imagined. She literally must be dying in that body of hers, with no way of escape. He imagined himself getting sliced open in the stomach and applied that to his understanding of her experience as much worse.

Wow! His fascination of her experience only continued to grow, even as he found himself flinching at the renewed understanding of the pain that lied behind her screams. He could never understand what Maggie was going through but he could almost feel himself beginning to understand it.

I'm sorry for you, I really am, but wow am I really enjoying this.

The battle between fascination and pity was warring in the deepest reaches inside him, neither giving any ground, creating an overwhelming sensation he could not turn off. The pillow Maggie had given him was certainly looking very tempting, that much was for sure.

And she was still at it, Maggie had already had more than enough of what no creature should ever have to go through, but it just kept on going. "JUST KILL ME ALREADY!" She shrieked, "UGHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Well, that would be murder," Liam said frankly.

"IF MURDER IS A CRIME, THEN LAYING AN EGG SHOULD BE THE WORST CRIME OF THEM ALL, BECAUSE IT'S A BILLION TIMES WORSE!"

Liam couldn't argue with that. Who'd be the perpetrator of that crime however, he had no clue, because it seemed like the one laying here was as much of a victim if anything.

"Make it stop make it stop make it STOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPP!" Maggie wailed pitifully.

"Unfortunately, nobody can do that now," Liam said, "You're in for the full haul."

Maggie could only manage to glare at Liam for the umpteenth time before the contractions overtook her yet again, and she was once again screaming, pounding her rear up and down with all of its amazing tailfeathers.

As she did it, Liam took in the world around him, the walls and posters of this room all clear; the floor at his feet so solid, yet Maggie, though coexisting in this very same space, her reality was locked fully within her own body, where the only thing that could exist was inescapable agony. The Universe was surely erupting and imploding inside her, yet here on the outside, the only indication of unimaginable pain was her deafening screams for mercy.

Maggie raised her behind once again behind her, ready for the final explosion of pain that came with the final push, she raised her beak and shrieked, and then abruptly came to a jarring stop. Her eyes went wide in frantic horror.

"IT'S STUCK!" Maggie shrieked, "THE @%$#ING THING IS STUCK! NO NO NO!!!!!" And then she was screaming, falling on her stomach and flailing her legs out behind her, her whole body trying to scramble away from the egg that had hard boiled itself into her, her whole body flinching as it tried to pull away from where the pain was aggravating.

"Of course it is," Liam said, "It's a really large one, so of course it'll be more of a struggle. If it helps, this happens sometimes, and gravids make it through this all the time."

She screamed as more contractions hammered her, trying to force, the egg refusing to move, thus jarring up her innards, "I DON'T CARE WHAT OTHER GRAVIDS GO THROUGH! THIS IS ME WE'RE TALKING ABOUT! IT HURTS SO @%$#ING BA- AHHHHHHHHHHHH- DDD!!!!" And, more screaming.

"Fair. I'd feel about the the same way if it was me we were talking about too."

Liam went back to check on the thing's progress; in truth, the egg wasn't much bigger than any of her other eggs, but even a smaller egg was more than enough to render too much for a bird to handle, and so with even the slightest upgrade, this egg was simply too big for her body to be able to effectively accommodate.

"Yeah, you're going to be at this a little while," Liam informed her, "Which can be a good or bad thing depending on who's looking at it."

"UGHHHH!" Maggie screamed in pure gravid angst, "JUST RIP IT OUT! I BEG YOU!"

Liam winced, imagining how that could even go. Without any handles, he doubted there'd be any way to even grip the egg. Plus, it wasn't good to disrupt the natural process, no matter how painful it was, they'd both just have to allow nature to take its course.

Plus, "Then that'd cause it to be over too quickly, I'm not sure about you, but I can do this all night."

"WELL I'M SO GLAD TO KNOW MY TORTURE EXISTS PURELY FOR YOUR @%$#ING ENTERTAINMENT!"

Maggie hated him, hated him with her very soul, just like she hated everything right now, but ironically, he was the only thing keeping her sane, (if sane was even a word that could describe her existence right now). As much as he was a stupid psychopathic sadist, somewhere inside, she knew he wouldn't want anything seriously bad to happen to her; as long as her torment appealed to him, she knew she was alright, so even as she squealed gutturally into the sky, wishing there was no tomorrow, a part of her held onto the truth that there would be one, that she'd be okay. He was the life of the party, and as long as he was here, her worst would be just another part of the party. So let the boy have his fun; for the girls, being gravid could only end in screams.

"YOU BETTER BE ENJOYING THIS GOOD!" Maggie shouted as the unhelpful contractions continued slamming at her body.

And then she was screaming again; the girl wasn't getting any relief. Liam couldn't even wrap his mind around how she could even manage to keep going at it, whether she had a choice or not.

"PLEASE, JUST LET THIS BE-" but she couldn't finish, couldn't form the next words if she wanted to, blinding pain consuming every aspect of her being, to where words themselves failed to exist, she tore her head into the air once more, screaming blindly, and a moment later, it was another egg down.

Maggie was trembling as the world faded back into existence around her. She felt herself pathetic; the feeling of shame was almost as bad as the pain.

"Please, I can't do this anymore!" She cried miserably.

At this point, even Liam couldn't feel right wishing more on her without checking on her.

"Not doing too well, it would seem," Liam said sympathetically.

"It's going way better than I'd ever give you the pleasure of knowing," Maggie said, scowling at him.

Still got that spunk. It seemed she was still doing okay, all things considered. Well, seeing that she was doing so... something, Liam didn't think it'd hurt-

"Glad to know." He said, "By the way, that thing you were doing with your bottom, it was next level."

Maggie felt her face turning red as she reflectively reached to cover herself up. Oh yeah, that just brought more attention to herself she remembered, going even more red, but still covering her outfitless bird-body anyway.

"Oh, my butt," Maggie moaned, "Oh, I can't believe I have to have a bottom!"

"Well, all beings have bottoms," Liam responded, "Even I have a bottom. I just have the sense not to show it off to those who might think me funny for it." He gave his school uniform the slightest of brushups to emphasize.

Maggie could only give him the death glare. "If this was a hundred years ago, you wouldn't have been in that uniform either. They'd never even heard of school uniforms back then."

He shrugged, "Perception does have an effect though. But I'm only teasing, your outfit choice is perfectly acceptable considering the circumstance; besides, I'm full aware that girls have special bottom issues to deal with that us guys don't have."

Maggie glared even harder, "You're lucky I like my bottom enough that I'm willing to share my 'special butt issues' with you."

"I said bottom, but okay," Liam mumbled mostly to himself; then, "But I am lucky, any other girl would've kicked me out long ago, but you've somehow decided to keep me around."

"I'm half tempted to," Maggie said half through her beak.

Maggie was holding her latest egg, and finally looked at it, a not too pleased expression on her face, "All of that for THIS!" She huffed, "This is hardly bigger than any of the others I laid!"

"It can be that way sometimes," Liam said, "I'm sure you were already tired after all those other ones, perhaps that's a contributing factor?"

"I am tired," Maggie moaned, "I can't take this anymore. I feel like I want to die! My body feels like it's already split through a billion deaths. Oh, how am I able to take so much pain!?" She could've died of self-pity alone, but she doubted neither her nor Liam would've enjoyed that very much. "Oh, I can't bear the thought of doing another."

Liam tried to think, feeling sympathetic, "Maybe we should decide upon a safe word." He said finally, "You know, for all this."

Maggie looked at him, throwing up her wings, "Oh yeah, I'm sure my contractions would be just thrilled to hear me screaming some safe word over and over again. 'Oh no, please don't! Pizza! Pizza! P_l_-izza have mercy! Noooooooo!' Yeah, not gonna work!"

Liam didn't have a response for a second, then, "Well, your choice," he shrugged.

...

Then realizing that probably came off wrong, "Well, not exactly your choice, but whatever floats your boat."

"Oh, my boat has been floated quite enough for one night, I assure you," Maggie said unenthusiastically.

Now this got Liam's attention, "Wait, are you saying you're finished?" he asked disappointed, "Please say there's one more - so sorry, but... I really want you to lay one more." Watching her expression, he realized it'd probably be appropriate to take it back down a step, "But yeah... I really have no excuse for that... I just really want you to lay one more egg. I know I'll be able to hang on through it, but you...? Well, I'll leave the less happy aspects to you. Sorry." He winced at his own words, but he hoped it was okay.

She glared at him grudgingly, "Well, looks like you're in luck," She scowled, "I'm glad I'm not me. Oh wait, I am! Lucky me! Or should I say lucky you, because you will never have to go through this!"

"You really can't handle another, can you?" Liam asked.

Maggie only scowled, "I'm sure you already know the answer."

"Works for me," Liam said. But then, feeling a bit guilty, "But remember, if at any point you want me to stop being so-"

But Maggie's eyes went suddenly wide, "JUST KEEP REMINDING ME HOW RIDICULOUS THIS IS!" she yelled as the pain again began to overtake, "THEN PERHAPS I CAN REALIZE HOW STUPIDLY UNSERIOUS THIS &%^$ING AGONY IS! NO! NO! NOT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

And then she was screaming again.

Liam didn't know, it certainly looked serious. But in an entertaining way. And perhaps that was what mattered, as long as he was entertained, she could rest assured it would turn out okay.

Or perhaps he had misread her signals. He hoped not, he hoped that's what she'd meant; it was one thing to find entertainment in her predicament, it was a complete other to... No, it was messed up no matter how you cut it, but at least he'd like to think she'd fully accounted for whatever messed up fascinations he had about her during all this.

The contractions were beginning to ease again, and Maggie was once again able to regain her breath a bit. Liam had another drink of water ready for her, and she drank again greedily.

"Oh please, I can't do this anymore," she whimpered. But then she looked over at Liam, "You had better enjoy every scream out of me Liam, because I know sure as ^&#@ I won't." She felt the tightess growing once again inside her, "No, no, no! Please, I can't take this anyMOOOORE...!!!!" And then the contractions restarted, and Maggie was screaming once again.

Wow! Liam didn't know how much screaming one gal could do in a day; Maggie had had more than anyone's fair share, that was for certain. But then again, that wasn't too uncommon for females, with how many eggs they lay and all.

Perhaps that's where the phrase "scream like a girl" came from, because only a gravid girl could scream this much.

But then it was through all this pain something snapped, Maggie's eyes shot open with determination.

"IF I'M GOING TO BE IN WORST EXCRUCIATING AS ^&%$ AGONY KNOWN TO LIVINGKIND," She declared, "THEN I'M SURE AS ^&*$ GOING TO LOOK GOOD DOING IT!"

Then, with something that could only be assumed as supernatural strength, she pulled her feet under her, and forced her legs upright until she was standing firmly on her own two feet. Liam almost gaped.

"OKAY MISTER!" She shouted at Liam as the contractions wracked at her body, she parted her legs and sent her behind up in the air behind her, tailfeathers extended strong, "WHAT IS THE $&*IEST POSITION FOR A GIRL TO PUT HER BODY IN WHEN SHE'S IN LABOR."

"Wait, you don't have to do that," Liam said frantically, "at this point I'd much rather you do what's most comfortable, you're going to hurt yourself... Well, technically you're already hurting yourself, it's going to hurt no matter what you do, and I kind of like you like this, but-"

"I'M NOT DOING THIS FOR YOU!" Maggie snapped, "I'M DOING THIS FOR ME! I DON'T KNOW WHY US GIRLS STILL HAVE BOTTOMS IN THE AGE OF FEMALE MODESTY, BUT SINCE I'M GONNA HAVE ONE ANYWAY, I AM GOING TO ROCK THE &$*# OUT OF IT UNTIL I CAN SCREAM NO MORE!"

"I know," Liam mused off-wingedly, "you'd think with how modest femininity is, you girls wouldn't be able to do stuff like this, but yet here we are, you doing what only you can. It's this duality that make femininity so amazing."

"OKAY! NO MORE DISCUSSING! IS THIS A GOOD POSITION!" She said, throwing out her feathers again.

"Well, I think any position is a good position as long as it emphasizes how much more modest I get to be than you." He shifted his own black tail feathers poking out of his school uniform, really hoping that he was coming off as playful teasing than downright condescending. It really is hard to tell with a girl in labor how into you she is at any given moment, and despite his sadism, he'd like to think he was giving her good company.

"YOU WANNA SEE IMMODESTY!" Maggie yelled, "I'LL %&^#ING GIVE YOU IMMODESTY."

And then she went into the most disgraceful birthing pose Liam had ever seen a female make. If he didn't know the birds from the bees before, he knew all the female a bird could be now, and it was certainly feminine.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK NOW!" She declared in gritted triumph through her pose.

But Liam simply narrowed his eyes as the thought occurred to him, "Well, it's cool when a girl turns out like that naturally, or when she strikes it during a more casual scenario, but the fact that you're able to control it right now... makes me assume perhaps all of this isn't as painful as I had previously thought," Liam said with disappointment.

Maggie's first response was to look offended, but then a smug look of victorious defiance crossed her face through the pain.

It didn't last.

The contractions hit full again, just as bad as ever, and Maggie was once again screaming and shrieking and howling skyward, throwing herself and her bottom around uncontrollably. And these poses, she couldn't have even tried better, because she was in pure torment, and the only thing of which she had any control was the desperate, helpless need to MAKE IT STOP! And even of that she had absolutely no control.

"Now this is more like it," Liam said. "To be honest, I hope all gravids end up like this. The possibility that simply having a certain type of body can make one's entire existence temporarily unbearable is a fascinating concept that I think really has the potential to be explored deeper. Plus, it's just really fun. For me at least. If it was fun for you as well, that'd kind of take all the fun out of the disparity of our contrasting existences. Again, so sorry for you, but I'm not regretting myself in the least right now."

And through it all, Maggie could do nothing but scream and writhe, and rock her more feminine features. If this was going to be her last egg, it needed to leave her no room for mercy, and fortunately, it didn't disappoint.

"On the positive side," Liam said, "You needn't have worried, these moves look pretty good on you."

"GoodgoodGOOOOOOOOOOOOD!" She squealed.

She really did have a great screaming voice, you could really hear the agony in it. Did all females scream this good when laying their eggs? If it hurt this bad, he didn't see how they couldn't. But right now, it was Maggie's screams that hit the ball out of the park.

"WHY ME!" She shrieked, "WHY MEEEEEEEEEEE-!" But nothing could hold back her screams.

Well, apparently it was her because only someone who was actually in that much pain could possibly be making screams like that. By these screams, it was undeniable, there was no way someone wasn't feeling this, and that someone just happened to be her. If it hadn't been her, it would've been some other chick, and she'd be asking the same exact question; so the real question was Why Not Her? Because she may not have been experiencing it, but why then would the poor chick who substituted for her be, someone to whom the pain would've felt just as real.

Ooh, chicks got all the bad luck. He knew he may not be feeling it, but that didn't mean it was any less real, because he had no doubt it was real now, real to any bird who had ever laid an egg, and every single one of those birds was just as real as him. Ooh, even the thought of him going through something that bad made him feel nauseous inside. And the craziest part was, it could have, the only thing that really separated him and Maggie was a couple of chromosomes. All that spared him from unimaginable pain was that single chromosome. He hoped chicks liked being teased about that, because he was in too deep to back down now.

"You do realize," Liam put in through her contractions, "You wouldn't be in this situation if you girls' bodies didn't work so weird." He was pushing it, he really was, but he was having too much fun. Was any of this fair? No. But that was all part of the fun. As long as Maggie got out okay, it could hurt infinite, he didn't have to know what it felt like, he could just imagine, and Maggie could forget what it felt like once it was over. Not too quickly though, he hoped, hopefully she'd get the privilege to process the inevitability of the experience for awhile.

And it wasn't forgotten way too quickly, she struggled with that egg for quite a few minutes, it was torture no girl in her right mind should be able to make it through, just pure senseless screaming from pain worse than... well pretty much anything.

But all experiences must eventually end, and then, with one final Earthpiercing shriek, the final egg was lain.

Maggie just laid in her pillownest panting hard, her whole body trembling. Finally, she took a deep breath and looked at Liam. "There, number 7, you happy now?" She lifted her wing to reveal the final of the eggs nested beneath her.

"I mean, yeah, but I'm not the one who had to experience it," he said, "I'm sure what makes me happy is far from what makes you happy." ... "But yes, it was very cool. Way cooler for me than it was for you, and I'm sorry for saying it, but I'm really glad I'm not you. I don't know how you girls do it."

"I don't either. Being a girl is just the worst!" Maggie said, slumping into her nest beyond all defeat.

"I wouldn't say that," Liam said, gently picking up her flower pin that must fallen off during all her franticing, and holding it out to her "I mean sure you just went through some of the worst torture conceivable... Actually, I can't find a way to put a positive spin on that, but I'm sure there are some upsides to being female that males don't have. You gotta admit, you gotta admit, you girls got all the cool stuff."

Maggie snatched her flowerpin away from him, "Cool? That we manage survive the most inconceivable torture imaginable?!" Staring at him, her face softened, and she could only roll her eyes; adjusting her headpin, "You guys have no idea what inconceivable torture feels like, do you?"

"I meant cool if you're not actually the one with all the cool stuff. Honestly, I get nauseous just thinking about being you. Good thing I only have to imagine it."

Maggie could only surrender. "I guess that's where the fascination lies. Well then, I guess I'm glad to give you the mystery."

"We good then?" Liam asked, "I know through the entire thing I was in a certain way, but..."

Maggie looked at him, her expression part annoyance, but also something a little more playful, something friendly even. "We good," she said finally.

But then, "But let me tell you, if you had even the slightest idea what even the smallest percentage of what any of this felt like, all fascination you have in the subject would be completely annihilated."

"You are probably absolutely right," Liam said, "But can I say, that just gets me even more. One thing's for sure though, after seeing you in action, I think us guys really take for granted the experiences that you girls go through. All things considered, you handled it surprisingly well."

"I literally couldn't have screamed any louder if I wanted, trust me, I tried, what you saw was only a small portion of what I was actually feeling."

Liam looked at Maggie's nest, seven eggs, perfectly ovular, blue with blue speckles, just like a Magpie's should be.

"So, last egg?" Liam asked.

"Last egg," Maggie said, her first sense of relief washing over her in awhile.

Liam could've been here all night, but even he had to admit, all fun things must end, and while he could keep entertained for quite awhile longer, it wasn't like he wanted Maggie to suffer endlessly. But he wouldn't have complained if there was an eighth egg, maybe even a ninth or a tenth, if Maggie couldn't take the seven eggs she'd already had, how would she take a few more. Oh well, maybe next time if Maggie would have him back.

But now?

Liam looked at the door, suddenly feeling awkward, was it time he should leave? The music from the party had quieted down again indicating things had begun to wind down out there (or else they heard Maggie's screaming and turned the music down from the unEarthly levels Liam had set; yeah, they knew what was going on up here), but Liam decided rather to geek out just a little bit longer.

"You know, I had never actually seen a gravid laying before tonight," Liam put enthusiastically, "So basically, you're kind of my hero."

"Well, you know, there's always a first time," Maggie said, getting up and waving her tailfeathers at him playfully. Then she realized she wasn't wearing her school skirts, and quickly grabbed a pillow to cover herself, blushing heavily. "You know, you'd make a good girl teaser."

"Girl teaser?" Liam asked confused.

"A guy who teases girls about their personal workabouts." Maggie clarified.

"And that's a good thing?" Liam asked, even more confused.

"Some girls like it," said Maggie giving him a look.

Liam decided not even try to decipher the subtext of that statement.

"You mean you're not offended that I found the least bit of fascination in all of it?"

"Oh, come on," Maggie said, "I've seen your podcasts, I know what you're into, if I'd had a problem with that, I would'nt have come to you. Besides..." She gave him that look again, "sometimes a girl could use a handsome guy having a little fun over her personal workabouts sometimes. Now tell me, your thoughts on all that? You had quite the show I hope."

Liam blushed, holding the pillow Maggie had given him awkwardly, "Yeah, well I'm probably going to have to do something really awkward with my pillow at least 50 times just to get over all the emotions I felt during this whole ordeal, my own pillow of course. Though I'm not entirely sure how well I made it through as it is."

Maggie went red, "Wonderful. Now I'm probably going to have to do it 5 times myself just knowing you're doing it over the embarrassment of my personal circumstances." She looked at her makeshift nest surrounding her, "Good thing I already have plenty of pillows right here for me. You didn't use this right?" She asked, snatching away the pillow she'd given him earlier and looking at it, "On second thought, you could use a cutzy pillow in your life right now," and she quickly gave it back to him, "I got enough pillows of my own."

Liam's held onto the pillow, eyes lit with amusement. "Well, enjoy."

"Oh, you bet I will. What I've just gone through was the absolute worst thing I've ever could've had happen to me, but you can be sure as $%#@ I'm going to enjoy what's going down here after, every single %&*#in' second of it."

Liam looked at her in shock, and Maggie went red, defensive, "I've already been using all those words, might as well get it out of my system." But already her self-consciousness was beginning to get the better of her, "But you know what? Never again. Until the next batch of eggs that is. I'm totally going to lose it all over again." She shuddered. "Because apparently, a girl doesn't have freedom of speech when laying an egg. Or freedom of modesty for that matter. Let's forget about freedom of dignity, and oh, Freedom from Cruel and Unusual Punishment, because my body sure as poop punished me for every second of my existence tonight."

"Poop is something we all can be sure of, male or female" Liam agreed, earning himself a whack from Maggie's lightweight feathers.

"Any other questions before I decide to kick you out - hopefully that kick landing somewhere very sensitive - and demand never to see your stupid face again?" Maggie asked, feigning impatience.

"Actually, Raven's are supposedly very intelligent birds, even those that have stupid faces." He paused, "Actually, I do have one," Liam said, "if going through all that is worse than the infinite nothingness of death, how do you go on living afterward knowing that's happened to you?"

Maggie put on a serious look, "We never speak of it again," she said, "But since I have a feeling that's not going to happen, how about you speak of it, and I pretend, 'hey, what's that again? I have no idea what you're talking about.'"

Liam narrowed his eyes, not entirely convinced, "But being female can't be all bad, right?" Wow, what was happening to him? Was he actually experiencing genuine concern? "I mean, I know how I come across, but I'd sort of feel bad if it was. It's only that particular circumstance? Which don't get me wrong, is astronomically cool, I can do with you suffering misery worse than death every once in awhile, but there's gotta be more to your unique part of existence then just misery that makes your life worthwhile."

Maggie looked at him surprised, then a softness came to it, "Well, maybe I can show you sometime," she said, giving her Magpieish tailfeathers a floof, "Might be fun once I've gotten to know you better."

"Of course I should probably get some therapy first," Liam admitted, "gotta find a way to balance all these messed up psychopathic feelings with some empathy for you."

"That would probably be a good idea," said Maggie, crossing her wings in front of her.

Liam blushed, "So is that a date?"

"Well, there's a party going on right now, is there not? Why don't we go downstairs, you give me a few dances and we'll see how it goes?"

"I'd be glad to," Liam said.

So, grabbing the discarded pieces of her school uniform, Maggie slipped them back on, and the two of them made their way out of the room and into the hall.

When they made it out onto the balcony, the other birds stopped what they were doing to stare at them. Yep, they definitely knew what was going on back in the room. But trying to be polite, they went back to their own business, trying to ignore the presence of the two "newcomers" as they made their way to the lower floor, talking and sharing drinks.

"I wish I had a guy to lay eggs with," one of the sorority chicks said quietly to a friend. Maggie couldn't help but overhear and blush.

And then a new song started to play, relaxed and romantic. Liam held out a wing to Maggie.

"Will you take this dance?"

"Oh, alright," Maggie said teasingly.

And so the two began to dance.

Like five seconds before Maggie stumbled, falling over into Liam. Liam tried to catch her, but instead tumbled into the floor with her.

Now everybody was starring.

"You know, maybe it was unwise to attempt a dance so soon after laying seven eggs," Maggie admitted.

"Hey, I can still dance," Liam said.

Maggie could only give him the glare. Liam blushed apologetically.

They'd work through it.

Maybe.