FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Did you know, I used to be a cat?

No, really! Well, at least I thought I was a cat. I definitely looked like one. Brown-beige with stripes and cute little green eyes. And... I was allergic to bees, would you believe that?

Hah, no, but that's what they told me. And I was so diligent to stay away from them, I was convinced, if I as much as let one land on me, I'd get stung and die on the spot, horribly. Not that there had been many chances. My stepmom was very protective, she barely even let me out to play on my own, cause of the bees. Only when it rained and the weather was horrible. She also made sure I was really afraid of flowers. You know, cause there could be a bee in there.

That went on like that until I reached puberty. That's when the weird dreams started. At first I thought they were nightmares, cause there'd be a bee flying towards me, and then I'd panic and wake up. But one night I was curious. I kinda knew I was dreaming. You know, when you're in a dream and know you're dreaming but still don't know what's going to happen? So I let it happen. There was this bee, sitting on my shoulder, with its big black facette eyes, and its mandibles, doing like this...

And I was thinking ... it's gonna sting me, it's gonna sting me... I was excited and afraid at the same time. You know, *that* kind of excited... I got kinda moist.

But then instead it talked to me. Or I kinda heard it speak in my head "Your majesty, what are your orders?" It asked.

Yeah I know! But think of me as a little cat girl in puberty instead! I had never been called 'majesty'. And the bee kinda looked cute. I didn't answer loud, but it read my mind, it knew I wondered what happened it it stung me... it also knew I was turned on.

"As you command, we shall find a drone for you!" it told me in thoughts, and then there was another bee, and... well... yeah, you guessed it. The dream then came with a really large smooth stinger going in a kind of forbidden place... and it was suddenly as big as I was... bigger even...

I had these dreams more and more often, and the bees slowly turned from my biggest fear into an erotic obsession at bedtime, but of course I hadn't ever seen a real bee.

If my stepmom had had her way, it'd have stayed that way. But then we had that school trip up north, and there was a surprise field excursion. I never joined one, cause, you know, I might get stung or something, but the teacher there didn't know about my allergy, and I didn't tell her. I wanted to go too!

There were only two classmates and me, who were lagging behind. The others had all run ahead but we were exploring. And then we found that wild bee swarm. When I heard that buzzing up in the tree I got all excited. I couldn't NOT go there, even when the others stayed back cause there were bees everywhere, I walked right up to it. As if ... as if they were calling me. Well, I guess, they were. And then the swarm came to me and started buzzing all around me. It was wonderful, almost as if the dream had come true. They were tiny, black and yellow and fuzzy, and so many of them. Hundreds. I forgot about the others, I think they got scared and ran. There was just me and the bees. All around me. A world of bees.

And then it started.

I guess if I hadn't had those dreams, I'd have died. Or lost it. Honestly, I guess, losing it there would have been the same thing as dying in that situation. At first it was just an itching sensation under my skin. Then squirming. I could feel them. Inside me, throughout me. Under my fur. I'm pretty sure anyone else would have panicked, but I liked it. I stood there, probably quite inappropriate, playing with myself.

But then again, there were bees all around, so maybe nobody would even have seen what I did. Or thought I was trying to swipe them of, or something,

I was touching myself. Felt the crawling under my fur. I could feel them IN my skin, I could feel them with my fingers, moving under my fur. But then I started feeling the bees themselves. So many of them. It wasn't very clear at first, my mind wasn't wired to feel a thousand times 6 little legs try to move in their confinements of mean and bone and skin, trapped inside me. But when I concentrated on one spot, on one little squirming little insect that was there, just under my nipple, where my fingers were touching, I could close my eyes and almost feel the world from it's perspective. Trapped, squeezed from all sides, trying to move, trying to clean itself. I was... I guess that was when it clicked. I realized that bee was a part of me. That bee WAS me. And so were... hundreds, thousands of them, all over me, in me, in my limbs, under my skin...

I could feel them even in my finger, as if every muscle, every part of me was becoming more bees. It was cramped in me, and hot, and they wanted out. I wanted out!

I don't know if I was moaning, or if I was screaming, or if I had lost the ability to speak already. I grasped my fur, with those fingers that were already made of bees on the inside, and started pulling, ripping, thrashing, moaning, tearing...

And then I burst open. I felt my skin part and split and rip, and I... they....

We were finally free...

And we could see. My eyes probably had stopped working by then. My old body was falling apart, but now I was seeing through their eyes. A thousand times a million little facette eyes. It was overwhelmingly bright. I couldn't tell where up and down was, but every single insect... they knew. Every part of me knew, and they took flight and I saw... I saw for the first time, how the world looked.

It's hard to describe. A single bee eye sees the world almost like you do. Not as sharp, a bit segmented. And the colors are all different. I actually to make new names for some colors, especially flowers. But I can't see red. What looks red to me is actually a dirty yellow to you and everyone else, and anything deep red looks just black or grey to me now. But I can see stuff, I call that color ultra-purple, and you'd need a special camera to even see that. You have no ideas what you miss when you look at field flowers.

Follow so far? Now imagine that, but a thousand times, from a thousand different eyes looking at different things. At first I thought I'd go crazy, but then I figured out how to just, like, go with the flow: Concentrate at what I cared about and just treat the rest like... you know, how you treat stuff at the corner of your eye. You see it, but you don't care unless it's a tiger jumping at you.

And then all those sensations. The little wings, constantly buzzing, the little mandibles, always looking for food. Every single bee wants to eat, wants to drink, wants to be clean, wants to serve its queen....

Oh and the queen, the queen was also me. It was pretty much inside me, well inside where I used to be. The bee's were always forming a ball around it, protecting it. In a way I am the queen and the queen is me. But then again the queen is just a little insect. I kinda identify with her, but in a way she's just one of many. I can raise new queens and replace her. That won't kill me, I'd still be me, as you see me now.

Bee's don't live that long, but they don't matter. Not more than the cells in your arm. I am more than their sum.

I am the hive.

And the hive is me.

Some of me raises new workers, and collect honey. The rest is this body you see. I might be a swarm of bees, but I'm still a girl, too. I know how to make new bees, new queens even, but I want to have a real daughter. Someone who is like me. Guess, that's where you come it.

So, yeah. That's basically it. So much for the flowers and the bees.... Now come here and let's find out how to do this. I'll try not to sting you...