The Hunt For Buckeyed Joe
#1 of Furry
A pair of bounty hunters bond as unlikely allies to deal with a unique job that will put their mettle and experience to the test.
THE HUNT FOR BUCKEYED JOE
The sun is setting on another hot and arid day in the town of Ponderosa Flats. This is a godsend to everyone in the untamed west as everyone starts coming out of the patchy woodwork buildings and mingle in the dusty road. A conversation about the brothel here, another about a brawl at the saloon over there. It was pretty relaxed until the galloping of a horse was overheard coming from the east. On the back of this horse was a portly Lionuki with brown fur and yellow mane. He kept his striped tail wrapped around his belly as he eyed his surroundings with a cold distrust as he fanned himself with his brimmed ten gallon hat. This gentleman brings his steed to a halt in front of the Inn where he wastes no time tying his horse to post and adjusting his appearance. After a quick tug on his tie and a tap on his loaded revolver he stomps inside.
In no time flat he spots Dathan, the fox who summoned him to this wasteland to begin with. He sat with a sly grin in the parlor as his unusually long tail quietly swished back and forth out the back. "Welcome Tirrance. I would say you are late for tea... but that never really was your thing was it dear?"
"Sod off Dathan." Tirrance the Lionuki says bitterly while plopping in a nearby chair. "You're lucky I came out this far "County Commissioner", especially without any information on the bounty in question."
"Yes, you will be briefed on this. Once your partner is done bathing-"
"PARTNER!!" Tirrance yells while jumping out of his chair. Dathan knew this would happen, hence why he withheld the information until this very moment. Tirrance gets right up on Dathan and jabs his pointer finger right in the little fox's chest. "I told you before-I WORK ALONE!"
Dathan swiftly and calmly raises his cane that he has been using to walk for the past two years to steady the situation.
"I understand, but this is not the same situation you are used to. This will be a wilderness trek, with a guide-ah! There he is." Dathan says while pointing his cane to the giant green werehog coming in through the backdoor wearing only a towel and a big grin. "Hey there Dathan! Thanks for recommending the bath! It was perfect." He says this with a smile as he trotted into the parlor unashamed of his lack of clothing. Tirrance could not help but steal glances at the man's abs as he plopped back into his own chair awkwardly.
"...You must be the guy I'm taking out to Kilgrave's Canyon. I'm EightySeven, but call me ES, it's easier!" The werehog never lost his grin, even when the room fell silent thanks to his scantily clad entrance.
"Tirrance...Go put some clothes on." The Lionuki says bitterly while rubbing his temple.
"We will get to this briefing now." Dathan interjected curtly. "I have missives to write and then be up early to make for the east." He taps his cane on the floor, making a hollow sound echo in the dimly lit parlor as the dusk nearly gives way to night. "Now, your bounty is to head to Kilgrave's Canyon and kill Buckeyed Joe along with anyone there that is aligned with him. He is a bobcat that is as crafty as he is smart-do not underestimate this one. Not to mention the information we have on him claims that he is laying low there after a major robbery of a bank in Del Rio. What makes this tricky is that it is at the end of several dried-up ravines that are all almost borderline identical. Enter, ES here. He is a former prospector that expertly worked the lands over."
"How much gold did you find?" Tirrance asked with an offhand interest.
"None whatsoever." ES responds and laughs. "So I decided to take up bounty hunting in these parts, mainly to help out the law and earn me some coin."
Tirrance scoffs and sits back in his chair, quietly judging the room as he awaits Dathan to continue.
"Ahem." Dathan glances at both of them. "This bounty will take a few days, trekking across the harsh wilderness and involve killing a dangerous target. We would have more capable men, but our window of time is narrow before these criminals vanish. His modus operandi typically involves him staying in a particular location no more than a week."
Dathan wraps up the briefing and hobbles out of the Inn with his trusty cane and the confidence those two will get the job done. The pair of bounty hunters are left alone in the parlor as they stare at each other for several awkward seconds.
"Soooo...you wanna-" ES is about to ask something.
"Get your damn clothes on before I shoot you dead." Tirrance sits calmly and suffers his new partner a cold gaze that could freeze fire.
"OK! OK!" ES hurries up the stairs, making loud stomps as he does. Tirrance can only sigh as he looks out the window, wondering what he got himself into on this job.
The morning sunrises all too soon for the pair as they saddle up and exchange barely a word between them. It does not help that Tirrance ran into an adorable male Tanuki that was doing the walk of shame from ES's room before the sun was up. After checking all of the supplies were accounted for they headed out into the wilderness. They continued to stay silent as evening fell and they made camp at one of the dried up ravines that had good shelter.
"We should be good to stop here tonight. If anything we will be ahead of schedule." ES said with his almost perpetual smile. Tirrance was getting worn down by this and even offered a smirk in response.
"I will scratch us up something to eat. If you would kindly survey our surroundings I would be grateful." Tirrance felt strange being this nice to ES, but he wasn't going to force anything.
ES happily complied as he looked about their camp for any vulnerabilities. Aside from a scorpions nest he found at the edge of their perimeter there was nothing of interest to report. He returned to a campfire with a cast iron skillet filled with bacon and beans. This is usual fare for wilderness cuisine but something about it smelled just amazing.
"Wow that smells so amazing! How did you pull that off with what we brought?" ES said with enthusiasm. Tirrance chuckled as he stirred the sizzling contents with a stick he found.
"Thank you ES! I have my ways. Gotta keep things at a certain caliber after you had the good stuff." He gives a hearty laugh as he pats his soft belly. ES plops by the campfire and takes another whiff.
"So, your gay huh?" Tirrance says as he doles out shares of their meal. "Aside from trying to seduce me I see you had another conquest in your room the whole time."
ES can only shrug as he scratches his head. "Yeah, but you are as well right? I saw the way you eyed my body back at the Inn." He says this and winks.
Tirrance sighs as he cannot deny this. "I am. But it is something I'm not open about. Not exactly a great thing to be right now. It's all about 'carry on your legacy! Have babies with a woman!' just can't stand it."
ES shovels the food in his mouth, savoring every bit that tastes ten times better than the hard tack they nibbled on during the day. "It helps nobody really wants to give me a hard time." ES says as he flexes his thick biceps. "Not to mention the guys flock to me for a safe night if you know what I mean."
Tirrance is mildly grossed out at how perverted that sounds, but he pushes it down to better empathize with his partner's experience. "I cannot help but respect that though. You want to make those guys feel safe, even if it's for one night in a country that finds them expendable." Tirrance gazes off in the wilderness outside the mouth of the ravine. It is barren and seemingly dead, but he knew life was all around them. Nature was such an amazing place from his perspective, not carry on and thrive without the aid of a greater being to guide.
"W-well I guess you could call it that." ES blushes at the compliment when in many ways he just sees it as getting sex from cute guys when he can. "So uh, my offer still stands you know? From the Inn I-"
"NO!" Tirrance cuts him off as he gets up to clean the campsite and get ready to sleep. He strips off his vest and tie, letting the button up rest untucked. He glances over and notices that ES strips down further, down to his undergarments. A sigh escapes Tirrance's mouth as he rolls his eyes. After taking another look around he settles into a comfy spot. He turns to offer first watch to only find ES passed out face down and snoring quietly. Tirrance smiles softly as he gets up to grab a thin blanket from the bag and softly drape it over the werehog's sleeping form. The night hours drift by as Tirrance decides to sit down next to ES and enjoy his sleeping company. He stares at the campfire until his sight grows heavy and fades to black.
Several hours later ES stirs awake and notices how warm he is, even with a smoldering campfire. The dots connect as he notices that Tirrance is asleep upright beside him seeming very relaxed in the way he obviously passed out. Morning will be here in about an hour so he quietly gets up and returns the kindness of his new friend by covering him with the blanket. ES stifles a chuckle as Tirrance grumbles and snuggles up in the blanket.
The sun rises and the rested pair set out on trail of their bounty once again. This trip was much more talkative as they chatted up the air around them. Several topics had been touched on to keep them occupied in the boring ravines. The downside is that they did not pay close attention to the sky as it prepared for heavy rain by mid-afternoon. ES cursed as the first drop hit his shoulder.
"It's supposed to be too early for rain! We have to find a way out of this ravine, if a flood comes we will drown. Come on!" ES beckons by urging his horse forward as they gallop through the rains that are growing heavier with each passing moment. Both of them could feel the anxiety in the back of their throats as the water rises with no easy exit to the ravine in sight. Tirrance bit his lip as the idea of abandoning their horses and supplies to climb. After almost an hour of treading the water was up to the horses knees and the weariness was showing. The dread was about to overtake them when ES spotted an incline leading into a cave. "There!" He shouted and pointed ahead. "It's now or never! We have to get out of this water!"
In a matter of moments they clodded into the shelter of the cave dripping wet, miserable, and exhausted. It is not even close to nightfall as they both are embittered by this setback, especially Tirrance who is quietly seething as scrounges up what he can to start a fire. "Well...It's not much, but I think we can at least get our clothes dry."
After some fiddling with some nearby rocks and a rope, all of their clothes were hung up by the meager fire to dry. "How did the blanket hold up?" Tirrance asks shivering in place. Being fully exposed to the elements and his traveling companion was a very awkward feeling. ES dug around the saddle and yanked out the rough blanket he had tucked away. "It smells like horse's bum, but the thing is dry." ES chuckles as he gingerly drapes it over Tirrance with a caring smile. "There we go. I would recommend we fall back on the tack tonight. No way we can cook with that fire, it will be just warm enough to get our clothes dry."
Tirrance plops down on the rocky floor, adjusting his tender rear as he wriggles closer to the fire without uttering a word in response. ES frowns at this with concern. "Hey, I'm gonna go farther into the cave and make sure we are safe. Just... get comfortable." He then sighs and wanders deeper in, drawing his large handcannon revolver for protection. This left Tirrance with his thoughts as he gazed into the little fire, clutching the blanket as close to himself as he could. Setbacks hit him hard as he recalls a failing early in his career. A botched stakeout that let his target escape. This would not have been so bad except the bandit ransacked a nearby farm. The monster killed every living thing on the property to prove a point to those who would follow. Men, women, children, livestock, all of it was slaughtered and burned in a night. He never stopped thinking about how their lives and his own would have been different if the job was done right. The memories cycle over and over as he becomes entranced by the flames.
"Hey bud. You alright." ES's large foot tapped him on the back and snapped him to reality. Tirrance shrugs after he looks up at ES and then gazes back into the fire.
"That's a large piece you have there." Tirrance says this flatly. "Looks pretty dangerous." A look of confusion comes across ES's face as he looks down. A long minute passes before TIrrance's eyes narrow, uncertain how to respond based on assumptions. "Your gun ES. I was talking about your gun." Half embarrassed and half annoyed, Tirrance rubs his temple.
"Oh! Y-yeah." ES chuckles awkwardly. "Normal revolvers don't really have a good feel. LIke to get something thick to wrap my hands around."
Tirrance, pulled the farthest away from his self-loathing yet looks up again.
"Really?" He asks exasperated. "I can't tell if you're doing a poor job of seducing me or have an actual point to what you are saying."
"N-no I'm not seducing you!" ES scrambles as he rushes over to the holster on his horse and puts the handcannon up. "Having bigger hands it just feels better ya know?"
ES proclaims and plops on the ground across the fire from Tirrance, a sachet of tack in his hand he takes from and tosses to his partner.
"I can understand that. I knew a gunsmith in the city that catered to guys like you. The craziest things he had made." Tirrance gnaws on the stale food stuff and looks across the fire to ES. "You obviously haven't been far from the wild west so to speak my friend, how did you get that gun?"
ES's eyes go soft as he gazes into the fire, using the dancing light to recall his memory. "Dathan did, he noticed how I was struggling with my gunplay and gave it as a gift. My shot got so much better since." ES points his finger at a nearby rock and aims his imaginary firearm.
Tirrance shivers when a gust of wind blows into the cave. The rain slowed down significantly as the nightfall came. ES notices how cold his partner is and gets up with the intention of aiding his friend. The werehog pushes his way under the blanket and pulls the lionuki close into his chest. Tirrance is pleasantly surprised by the warmth and with a sigh of relief accepts the embrace.
"You're like a furnace. So warm-" Part of Tirrance wants to have some quip ready when it comes to dealing with his partner, but the mental fatigue took its toll so he just accepted it.
"No funny business I promise. The way you are shivering you're gonna get sick." ES reassures while stroking Tirrance's mane.
"ES...Thank you." Tirrance utters as he falls asleep.
"Not a problem." ES responds but notices that Tirrance fell asleep. "Poor cutie." He gently pets Tirrance while he turns his gaze outward to the slow rain at the mouth of the cave. It is easy to see that the horses would have been swept away, possibly injuring or killing them in the process. The lullaby of rainfall and the gentle light of the dimming fire was enough to help him drift off to sleep with a precious new friend in his embrace to share warmth.
The next day comes and everything seems a little brighter, not even accounting for the way rain clears the atmosphere. To ES's delight the ravines calmed to a manageable flow of water and they can continue on their way and reach their target by evening. Their good times come to an abrupt end as they case the hideout of their target.
Buckeyed Joe is sighted along with a small handful goons at an abandoned mine, all the information was on point. The shoddy wooden structure built into a hill several meters from the ravine that is held up by the same beams provided protection to the miners that once did honest work, now a home to bandits smuggling their plunder.
"Ok...What's the plan?" ES asks doing his best to keep his broad shoulders hidden behind some boulders..
"Obviously they don't know we are here yet at least." Tirrance states as he quickly glanced about and ducks. "We are outnumbered, even more than I anticipated. I did not exactly bring anything besides my gun and some ammo."
ES scratches his head and quietly chuckles. "Well...I might have brought... five sticks of dynamite."
Tirrance holds back from screaming at ES and settles for a sharp punch to the werehog's shoulder. "Are you serious!" He tries to say quietly as he can through his teeth. "That is something you usually bring to the table on day one."
"I always keep some with me. A habit from the old days, so I didn't think about it-I have never actually used it on people before." ES frowns knowing what their strategy is going to be.
"Our job is to wipe them out though. That will even the odds right? Tirrance nods while keeping eye contact with his partner. The pair come up with a strategy and wait until dusk to make their move.
The bandits finished packing up their stuff to get ready for the next mark by evening as they gathered around their fire. Idle chit-chat and boasts fill the air as the bounty hunters lay the trap. It was easy to maneuver around with their guard down. Once everything is set they waste no time igniting the long fuses and sitting with intense concentration on opposite sides of the camp. The flickering light dances swiftly along the ground until...BOOM! The entrance to the mine is destroyed and their cart is blown to bits, the loud bang and fire distracts the target as both Tirrance and ES draw and begin their assault.
ES's handcannon thunders with each shot thanks to its power and sends his enemy to ground in a single hit one after the other. Tirrance skillfully draws the hammer on his to speed up the fire and drop bandits quickly; taking careful measure of their movements to calculate his next shot. There is some retaliation with stray fire from poorly drawn weapons, but needless to say this did them no good. Only a few minutes pass, but for the bounty hunters in a fit of adrenaline felt like it took an eternity. The two of them met in the middle at the bandits fire with heavy breath and furiously beating hearts. Both of them had to take a deep breath before calming down enough to interact. After looking at the wreckage they caused, laughter erupted from their bellies. Unfortunately that is not the only thing. A gunshot rings out and ES feels a terrible pain in his chest. He looks down to see blood quickly staining his clothes. Tirrance looks on in horror for a split second before darting his eyes about. It was Buckeyed Joe, he was only injured from the explosion, barely able to get to stand up tall enough to get a shot in. Tirrance's eyes watered as he fires, killing his target with the remaining four shots in the cylinder. Terrified he throws down his weapon and races to ES's side. The werehog was gasping for breath and struggling to move as the drop in blood pressure threw everything for a loop. Tirrance rips ES's shirt and it is clear that the bullet punctured his lung. He is crying knowing full well that his friend does not have long.
"ES! Stay with me ES! Please!" Tirrance sobs these words out as his mind races through his knowledge for an answer that isn't there.
"T-Tirrance-" ES reaches out. "It's pretty bad huh?" He attempts to chuckle but only coughs up blood.
"Oh no no no it's fine really... it is." Tirrance is doing a poor job at reassuring his friend and this stirs a great pain as his heart hurts.
"We...we did good. Be proud, your face is too cute to be sad." ES utters this with great effort before collapsing from the blood loss and inability to breath. He dies in Tirrance's arms shortly after, a man that once hardened by life is broken and left to sob in the dead of night.
Dathan waits patiently at the edge of town waiting for his bounty hunters to return. He stamps his cane, kicking the dust about as he passes the time. On the horizon he sees Tirrance on his horse, which sparks joy in his eyes. However, this is short lived as he fully takes in that the other horse had an empty saddle. He can see that Tirrance has a defeated expression once he gets close enough and hobbles quickly to meet him.
"The job is done. Buckeyed Joe is dead, along with all his men. You can send a group up the ravine to pick up any spoils they had. I used all my time to bury ES." Tirrance's grief is so strong he feels he could crumple and fall from his horse.
"I see." Dathan's ears go back and he drops his head. "He was always such a kind soul, and I know both of you did everything you could."
Tirrance rides past, thinking only about finding a quiet place to drink and mourn.
"I will put his share to good use. I will put it towards helping our brothers and sisters." Dathan calls out with a wave of his cane. Tirrance looks back with a surprised look on his face, but it gave way to a weak smile before resuming his path back to the Inn. It did his heart good to know that ES's efforts would not be wasted.