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I feel pretty bad about this, but I think it would be best if I ended Samel's Summer here.

I know this is sudden, but I believe it's for the better.

This was my first attempt at writing smut and I hadn't found an approach to it that fit the medium. I built this story up like I would my non-sexy stories and it shows.

I don't think that's a bad thing, in fact I think some moments of Samel's Summer (Parts 10 & 11 in particular) have some of the most detailed and emotional drama I've ever written. But I've always been a bit at odds with that. I decided to write smut for smut's sake, and my first story wasn't well adapted to the medium.

I was essentially writing an erotic drama novel. And that's cool, repeat readers definitely enjoyed it (and I am ever grateful for the enthusiasm you guys instilled in me), but as time went on I got tired by the prospect of writing this out. I wanted to spend my horny time working on stories that indulged my horniness, which Samel's Summer didn't always do. I sure as hell didn't jerk off to any of Davie's mental breakdowns, I can tell you that much.

After I wrote A Wolf's Plea, my second smut story that was more tailored to my enjoyment of the medium, I really lost faith in Samel's Summer. I still wanted to see it through, I believed in my ability to write it out but whenever I tried I just found myself more interested in other ideas, like A Bear's Needs.

So I'm sorry, I know some of my readers really enjoyed Samel's Summer. I'd like to make it up to you though. This is more than an apology.

I have two things to share.

First up, Samel and Davie will be returning in the sequel story to A Wolf's Plea, which I'll be able to work on more without feeling guilty about Samel's Summer. I've mentioned this previously, but since making this decision I've actually given them a bigger role in that story. If you enjoyed Samel's Summer, and especially if you enjoyed A Wolf's Plea too, I think you'll really enjoy that when I'm ready to start releasing it.

And secondly, below are my notes and summary of the remaining parts of Samel's Summer that will go unwritten. If you were invested in the story, please read them. It would've been a lot smuttier than it comes across in these notes as I'm mainly focusing on the plot elements.

Following Part 15 (Rough Reunion), Davie continues trying to find the boundaries of Samel's sexuality. After much brutal sex, he succeeds. He's finally pushed Samel to his limits, only he went too far. Nothing immediately seems wrong, they stop what they were doing and Davie apologizes. Samel even takes the apology well.

But after that, Samel struggles to get in the mood. Sex was the one thing their relationship had going for it and that comes to a grinding halt. They start trying to build up their emotional connection, only it faces all the same difficulties they had before. They're kind of just not right for each other without the sex. Davie starts to freak out, feeling like he's broken their relationship.

During this time Samel's friends all come back and he starts to spend less time with Davie, who reacts poorly. He starts spinning out again and is needy as he keeps trying to find reasons to spend more time with Samel who seems to be growing more and more disinterested. Truthfully, Samel is just excited to be with all of his friends again. He doesn't mean to be ignoring Davie, he's just young and isn't that aware of his actions. This is his summer break after all and he should be spending it how he chooses.

As Davie's mental health implodes, Samel finally realizes what's been happening. He tries to make it up to Davie, but things really aren't working. It stresses him out, he becomes increasingly upset about all that's happened. Their relationship has been non-stop disaster and it doesn't feel like it's getting better.

Davie shatters. Samel cancels all of his plans with his friends and devotes himself to spending time with Davie. This upsets Samel's friends, he starts to feel like he's cursed to be unable to make good decisions for anyone. But this is the trap that his relationship with Davie has left him in. He grows bitter and upset, which leads to frustrated sex with Davie. In need of positivity, their relationship takes another wild upswing. Davie's always been the thing that's made him happiest, and the boar's fluxing emotional state provided a good springboard for something joyful.

Hunter tries to mediate things with Samel's other friends, but it all falls through when Samel himself is no longer interested in being their friend. Even in highschool Samel never really felt that close to any of them except Hunter. While he was excited at first to be reunited with them, he no longer needed their friendships. Hunter is understanding and helps settle things peacefully. He starts spending more time with Samel and Davie and things get sexual between the three of them.

Samel and Davie are approaching what seems like a healthy emotional relationship following the drama. They're more open and affectionate than ever before. Samel makes the decision to meet with his parents, who prepare a nice dinner for him. He's uncomfortable around their suggested homophobia (it's a lot lighter than Samel takes it) which eventually is the reason Samel retreats to his old bedroom, distressed and in need on comfort. He starts texting Davie, but Samel's father comes to speak to him. His phone is on the bed between them as they have a heart to heart. Davie sends a sweet text that unfortunately leaves no mystery as to whether or not they're dating. Samel's father reads the message preview.

He's not actually homophobic, just old and needs some help understanding but that's too sensitive of a topic for Samel. Everyone else has always doubted his relationship with Davie, he wasn't going to take it happening from his parents too. He blows up in a bad mood that escalates to a shouting match against his parents. He's only 19, but he reckons he's old enough to live his own life and that he knows what he's doing. He storms out, Davie picks him up. They have more frustrated sex.

The end of summer isn't far away. Samel and Davie take a trip up to Fowling to get away from all the negativity in their country town. They spend a few nights at a motel, looking for a place to move into. They find cheap accommodation near Samel's college that isn't just limited to students and Davie puts down money on a lease. That was it, they were committed now. Davie completes his job transfer as well. Everything is in place for the two of them to elope.

When they return, Step and his family come back too, ending Samel's time housesitting the country manor. He stays with Davie for the remaining days of summer. But Step sends him a text, asking if he knew that their house had security cameras. Samel freaks out. All of his exploits with Davie in their house were recorded. All the sex, the fighting, everything. Even Hunter is dirtied by the evidence. It's clear they'd been found out from the message, but they wouldn't have had time to go through all the tapes yet, he wasn't even sure if they would given their content. Samel still wants to get hold of them, only he can't. There's no feasible way it's possible. He faces the prospect of leaving an unspeakable amount of video footage of himself and others up in the air, potentially to be used to hurt his, Davie's or Hunter's reputation in the town for the rest of time.

It's the end of summer and Samel's lost all of his friends except Hunter, burned bridges with his parents and left a wealth of troubling footage of his sexual encounters. But at least he has a turbulent, chaotic relationship with a guy almost 30 years older than him.

On the final day before they leave, Samel and Davie go to the park for one last date, hoping for something peaceful. Instead they come across Ky, Davie's abusive ex-boyfriend, who's a cop. He instigates trouble with them that comes dangerously close to a physical confrontation. Ky begs Davie to hit him, that he'd love to charge Davie with assaulting a police officer.

Realizing what could happen, Davie backs down. It's remarkable for how heated he'd become, it is a note towards his growth, how Samel and his therapy had helped him improve. But it's really difficult to see that as much of a positive in the middle of everything else.

Samel and Davie elope to Fowling, both of them pretty keen on never going back to their hometown. It's a depressing car ride to the city, with both of them feeling down and stressed out about everything that had happened. They start reflecting on their relationship with uncertainty as well.

Once they make it to their new place, Davie sits Samel down for a chat. He makes Samel promise that if he finds a romantic prospect his age that he should take that opportunity instead, that it would be better for him than Davie could ever be. It's something Davie says he'll do as well.

Reluctantly, they both agree that if they find someone better, they'll move on from each other. But in the meantime, they'd celebrate what they have because they do love each other. Perhaps they always would.

It's an almost bitter ending to a story of turmoil. They've both grown tremendously from the experience, but a lot of it has been negative. They're the conductors and survivors of their own drama. What Davie said at the beginning had been true the entire time: that this wasn't worth the headaches. But it was their story, and what they chose to do. There's still things to appreciate among the wreckage, like the moments they truly are happy with the love they share (Part 13 really stands out because of this). Samel's reached a deeper level of understanding about himself. Davie's finally taken charge of his mental health. The two of them have forged a bond through sex, strife and love that is strong despite their troubles.

The pool at Step's manor was meant to be highlighted as a metaphor for the health of Samel and Davie's relationship. I wanted to make it seem like some obvious story beat that would slowly mend and suggest an ending where they have a healthy relationship, only the pool would never be clean.

In fact by the end of the story, the pool would have to be drained.

Samel and Davie were a wrecking ball. They were volatile and they were going to keep breaking things around them the further they went. After all the drama between them, Hunter's relationship with his girlfriend was the first to go. Next was Samel's friends. Then Samel's relationship with his parents and more.

Samel and Davie were never meant to be, but no matter what was thrown at them they pushed on together.

In a way, I think it's admirable.

In another way, I think it's pitiful they never saw the effect they were actually having on others. Never evaluated what was happening despite both of them being critically aware of other details. They remained blind to the source of their plight because they always blamed others instead.

And that's Samel's Summer.

Hopefully you understand some of my difficulty with trying to continue this story. It's not a particularly upbeat one, though it had its moments and depending on what outlook you have on relationships maybe you feel positively about how Samel and Davie wound up. After all, they are still together.

I would love to hear your thoughts on my direction for the story, or anything else you'd like to say. If you have questions, I'd love to answer them too.

Thank you for reading and thank you for supporting my first foray into smut. I'm sorry again it turned out this way, but it just wasn't something I could make myself finish.

-Apatapa