A simple story III : Part 9
#8 of A simple story III
The door at the 42 Bishops Road was virtually blocked. Outside, on the doorstep, an adult rott and a child. On the other side, the two lovers. All glaring at each others. Fred didn't know what to do. Greg had a small idea but it involved first removing the innocent child before throwing the guilty adult onto the street with all the violence he was capable of. The latter, precisely, did not know what to do either. He saw his son staring at him with bad intentions and a stranger a little behind him, who was looking at Greg with concern. The little boy didn't know what was going on. A little worried, he greeted the lovers with a timid hand. Fred noticed this and put a hand on Greg's shoulder to calm himself down, sensing the worst.
Greg recovered quickly. His gaze on Rusty Maxwell changed to show only anger. Fred realized the tension that reigned. It didn't took long for him to realize that the little boy was afraid of Greg, now clinging tightly to his father's pant leg.
Greg looked at Fred, and his resentment eased. Seeing the fear on the child's face, he relaxed completely. Rusty was holding his young son by the shoulders, in case Greg lost control of himself.
Fred took it upon himself to clear up the situation, walked past Greg and dropped to one knee and addressed the boy.
" Hi kiddo... "
The child did not move.
« How would you like a bite to eat ? Looks like you missed lunch... "
The boy still had no reaction. Rusty motioned for him to follow Fred. The boy was worried, but his father's smile convinced him and he let it go. Fred stroked his head, a gesture the boy hated and smiled at him.
« And what's the name of this little rotty ?
Luke, mister.
Well Luke, let's see what I find in the kitchen... Would you like a homemade burger ?
Oh yes sir... "
The little child was very happy to be promised a good meal, forgetting for a moment his timidity overcome by gluttony. Fred walked away with the boy and locked himself in the kitchen, leaving Greg and Rusty alone. Greg turned and cleared the passage. Rusty entered. Greg still had his back to him.
« Fred is going to feed him and then you can take him home. I go up to my room, we have nothing to say to each other.
Gruff...
We have nothing to say to each other.
Have mercy... "
Mercy. Greg had expected anything, but he never imagined hearing that word from his father's mouth. Greg looked at Rusty again. He saw him cry a little, another thing the latter had never done. Greg finally noted the great thinness of the latter. He couldn't be healthy looking like that.
" I... I'm the last of the wretches, Gruff. I know it. I did not come for... It wouldn't help, I know that too. I should never have behaved like this with you. Never. I sincerely regret it. But I did not come for this.
Why then ?
I...Came to ask for your help, Gruff. "
Greg was amused, pissed off, surprised and amazed at Rusty's nerve at the same time. The latter could see the reaction of his child. Greg felt sincerity in his voice though.
" It's not for me. It's for Luke. "
Rusty nodded to the young child who had gone into the kitchen.
« Fred will take care of him, don't worry."
Greg was careful to keep his voice firm but neutral. He saw Rusty smile a little. His voice was tired, hoarse, as if his owner had been permanently marked by his life.
" He looks so much like you. I was right. It's all you at your age. You could almost believe he is your clone. "
Greg's attention was drawn to this point. He looked at the closed kitchen door from which now came a good smell of grilled meat. He looked at Rusty again.
" He is...
- Your brother, yes. "
Greg lifted his head, to swallow the tears that were rising in his eyes before looking at the door again.
" My brother... "
Greg's eyes grew even more moist, and his voice was more emotional and softer. Greg inhaled deeply.
" My little brother...
- He will be 5 next month. "
While he had the firm intention of making him understand all the anger and hatred that had inhabited him since that fateful day he had been driven from his home, Greg realized the artificial and unnecessary nature of these feelings. He was still angry but now he regretted having scared the little boy. Especially since they were of the same blood.
Rusty spoke again with the same sick voice.
« For you to understand what I want from you, and for him especially, you have to... I need to tell you about everything that happened to us... You... "
Greg cut him off abruptly.
« Listen to you ? Why would I do this ? Did you listen to me nine years ago ? No ! Not a word ! Finally yes ! Five ! You will burn in hell ! Family love in all its glory ! Real pedagogy ! "
Greg had never forgotten this snippet of conversation with Rusty, surprised on the phone.
" I should never have reacted like I did, Gruff. I do not exhaust myself asking for your forgiveness because I know it is wasted effort. But from the bottom of my soul, I sincerely regret what I did. "
Greg was impressed. He knew the deep religiosity of his parents, and he knew that Rusty would never invoke his soul lightly. This made him understand the probable sincerity of his words. His gaze on him was still filled with cold anger, however. He sighed.
" I'm sure it won't change anything but while my... brother is eating, I must keep busy myself... "
Rusty settled down on the sofa. Greg realized at that moment the man's physical and material distress. His pants were patched up, his shoes didn't make a pair. He hadn't paid attention to it, but he was pretty sure Luke's clothes were pretty much the same.
" When I received these photos from I don't know who, I immediately felt shame, anger, disgust. I'm up front and honest with you, Gruff. That is what I thought. Your mother didn't want to believe their authenticity. I also doubted then. We waited for your return. You came back as I asked you to. And Maureen saw you kiss and hug that boy. For us, it was the end of the world. You were what we didn't want you to be at any cost. We feared it a little. We knew it now. That night after you left...
- I did not left. You kicked me out. "
Greg's voice was harsh.
" It is true. After we chased you away, we prayed to God to know what to do. We spent hours meditating and praying. But none of this calmed us down. Nothing at all. We have therefore taken the joint decision to end our relationship with you.
That's how my things ended up in the trash.
And that we changed the locks, yes. We sincerely thought we were right, Gruff. I'm ashamed to say it today because now I know it was wrong. We were blinded. By our beliefs. Our traditions. Our faith. Our opinion. I make it clear "our". Because we have always made these decisions together, your mother and I. I wish I could say I was weak, that I just followed your mother. But that would be a lie, Gruff. I participated of my own free will in this. And I will never be able to erase this fault. I'll have to report this to God soon. I only hope for a little mercy from him, for my repentance is sincere. We subsequently ignored everything about you. You no longer existed for us. We threw away letters from the court that we knew concerned you without opening them. But knowing you live a few streets away from where we were, that was no longer possible. We then decided to move. To take advantage of this trial to come closer to God. "
Greg scowled a little. Rusty continued, his hands folded between his knees.
" Well, what we thought was God. We sold the house and headed for a remote part of Oklahoma. In a closed community that we had heard about in the Church. We were happy there for a few years. It is subsequently where your little brother was born. We took his coming as a sign from the Lord, a sign that told us that we had done right. We had so hoped for this second child, Gruff... For years we had tried to give you a brother or a sister. And Luke was born. It wasn't long after that that things started to change.
What do you mean ?
The money from the sale of the house had been spent on the community. We had nothing more than our labor force. We had to work twice as hard as the others to make up for the lack of money. We were tired. And Maureen... Began to change too. "
Greg was genuinely curious, and Rusty looked away, embarrassed.
" In what way ?
We had always been faithful to each other. The community was led by a very charismatic priest. He was very learned, he knew the sacred texts practically by heart. His physical presence was a gift, a favor.
Let me guess. Especially with women.
Yes. Even married women. The priest was very convincing. He could justify even what violated the Ten Commandments. We were captivated by his presence and his aura. We were blinded. Nobody said anything, everyone thought it was also normal that from time to time he brought girls who were barely 10 to him.
The bastard...
Shortly after, your mother felt ill. The community was very tight-knit, we had doctors and nurses. Able to treat anything and everything, for free. But when your mother got sick, my eyes started to open. I then noticed the graves. Many. Women, mainly. I raised the possibility of leaving with Maureen, but she refused. A few weeks later, we heard rumors circulating about the priest. I didn't want to believe them. But I saw it with my own eyes. He was also starting to bring young boys into his office. "
Greg winced. He wasn't surprised.
" My eyes are wide open from that day. Those of my wife too. We left, without too much difficulty. In fact, we stole a car and some goods because we had sold our possessions. We drove to the next town where Maureen was hospitalized after she started coughing up blood. The community doctor had made the correct diagnosis. Pneumonia. But the treatment had been almost ineffective, and for good reason. Maureen had AIDS.
Huh ?
The priest... Maureen told me he used condoms. But in truth, to save money, he reused them.
Oh shit...
They often split, I know because I sometimes found them in the trash.
And you didn't do anything...
And we didn't do anything, no. If we had been alone, Gruff, we would have denounced him. And then we would have gone to jail for the theft. But Luke was here. Do you understand the choice we had ? To denounce the guy was to send Luke to the orphanage. To be silent was to keep him with us.
And you didn't say anything...
This is not entirely true.
What do you mean ?
Maureen died eight months after we left. Her funeral cost me the last money I had left. I had nothing more than me and my son. Fortunately, she was not infected until after Luke was born, so he was unharmed, the hospital proved it to me. The night of her funeral, I sent an anonymous letter to the police. It was all I was able to do without endangering Luke's presence by my side. I don't know what happened to it afterwards.
And after ?
-Then... I wandered for months, across the country. I made my living as best I could. What little I had, I devoted it to Luke as a priority. But now I can't do it anymore. A year and a half ago, I started coughing up blood too. A pneumonia that does not pass. "
Greg's attention was heightened.
" You...
I have AIDS, yes. Maureen... I never had enough to pay for therapy. When I knew I was doomed, I set out to find the only person who could take care of my son. You.
Why me ?
You are the last member of the family able to take care of him, Gruff... At least, initially, I hoped so. I started looking for you. I was too cowardly to speak to your uncle. And then he would have probably strangled me had to be able to say anything. "
Greg felt it was possible. And deserved.
" I gathered information from friends who stayed in town. I knew you left for Europe. For me it was a disaster, because I did not know how to reach you. And I knew you would always refuse to answer my letters, or even talk to me on the phone.
You are quite right...
So I had to speak to you in person. More, I wanted...
What ?
I wanted to see you one last time. All the doctors that I have consulted thanks to the homeless associations have told me the same thing, and I can feel it too. I have less than a year to live. "
Greg closed his eyes and put his head in his hands.
" God has justly chastised me, and in his great Mercy, he allowed me to see you again, and to give my other son the chance to...
- I AM NOT YOUR SON ! ONLY ED AND MARK HAVE THE RIGHT TO DESIGNATE ME SO ! "
Greg couldn't take it anymore. All his senses were exalted. But there was more than anger in his eyes. There was sadness too. He knew it, and that's what drove him crazier with the pain.
Greg felt pity for him. He didn't feel he had the right to feel so much humanity, compassion towards him. Not after everything he had done to him. But he couldn't help it.
" I know that, Gruff. I know your parentage has definitely changed. But whatever you do, whatever you say, you're still my child. And it is in this capacity that I want to entrust you with Luke. I want to give my boy a home. He never knew stability. We were always on the road, we lived and ate often thanks to charities. I don't want anything for myself. I just want to make sure Luke is happy and that he doesn't end up in some orphanage.
« The boy didn't do anything, it would be unfair of me to make him pay for the anger I feel for you.
I knew you would say that. I'm glad to see my boy is going to have a better life. Our trip will not have been in vain.
Your... Yes indeed... How ? 'Or' What...
How did we get here ? This has not been easy. We traveled by boat. I struggled to find a ship that would take me and my son to come here. We couldn't travel by plane, Luke has no papers.
What do you mean, no papers ?
He was born into a community. His birth has never been reported to the civil registry, he has no legal existence. I know because I tried to get a passport for him. It was a long trip because the ship was not going directly to England. Once there, my first goal was to locate you. I knew you had changed your name and that you were playing for the Wasps. But I didn't knew your address. Your name does not appear in any directory. I couldn't see myself going to your club headquarters to ask for it. Even if I had been believed by saying that I was your father, they would not give me such information.
Of course. Why wouldn't I have done it straight away, unless I don't want you to know where I live ?
This is exactly it.
How did you do then ?
God helped me, I think so. For my accommodation, I went to a center of the Salvation Army. While filling out the usual paperwork, I came across a paper.
The Sun ?
Yes. "
Greg sighed. Once again, that damn rag was the cause of his troubles.
« You weren't with the same boy your mother surprised you with, the description didn't matched. But it was you. The article gave me no clues to find you, except one, your partner's name.
It is true that this thing gave the name of Fred...
Knowing his rank and name, finding him was not difficult. I knew he had left the army, and through an understanding soldier, I learned that he had moved to come here to High Wycombe. The hardest part was finding the street. But with patience, we eventually saw your friend returning back home. Following him was childish, and I cried with joy when I saw your name on the mailbox. We just had to wait for you. "
Greg didn't say anything more. His mind was still tormented by the duality of emotions that assailed him. He didn't want to pity or forgive. But he also felt he had to do it. Mark's words were in his head.
« There will be those who turn their backs on you, and who come back later. Weeks, months, or years later. It will be up to you to see if you forgive them or not. "
Mark had spoken about Greg's friends. Did this also apply to the family ? Greg stood up and looked into the kitchen. Luke was finishing his meal under Fred's benevolent watch. Greg knew his friend had overheard a good part of their discussion, he knew about the lack of sound insulation in this part of the house.
Greg returned to Rusty.
" Come with me.
Where ?
In my room. "
The two men went upstairs. Greg closed the door to his bedroom, then began to undress without a word. He quickly found himself shirtless. Then he walked over to Rusty and put the bite mark he was wearing on his right shoulder under his eyes.
" You know what it is ?
No.
Fred does this to me. He has one too, that is... kind of like a mutual tattoo. We have so much fun that we bite our shoulders. And you know why I'm showing you all this ?
No.
Because I want you to know it. I want every part of you to know what I'm capable of doing with my body. I want you to know how much I enjoy doing ANYTHING that I would be prohibited from if I had ever followed the life you intended me to do. I want you to know that all the education you gave me was a complete failure. Mark and Ed taught me not to be ashamed of my body. They taught me the happiness we can all get from ourselves and from each other. They taught me, no matter how we use our bodies, that true love is only given before it is received. "
Rusty looked at Greg with the same sad eyes. Everything he had told him seemed to have slipped on him.
" I am not mad at you. Besides, I no longer have the right. I just want to tell you this. During my years of wandering, I learned a lot. Out of the mental and moral shackles in which I had locked myself, I understood that the sincerity of relationships and feelings that men have towards each other do not depend on the sex of their partner. I have met men and women who obviously haven't loved each other for a long time, and who force themselves to be together because of their children. I have seen more love and passion in the looks of two men or two women than in many married couples. This look and this passion, I saw them too, in your eyes and in those of your partner. This only strengthens my resolve to leave Luke with you when the time comes. My little boy needs love, attention, and I know you can give him what he needs. "
Greg couldn't take it anymore. He clenched his fists like he had never done before. Even when Francis had confessed to having cheated on him, he hadn't been hurt so badly.
" I... I hate you, dad. I want to hate you, despise you, for everything you've done to me. You don't know how much I suffered when Mark found my books in the trash. I want to be able to hate you because of what you think, because of what you believe. But I can't do it anymore, dad. I can not do it anymore. And I hate you even more because of it. "
Greg then threw himself into Rusty's arms, who hugged his boy. Greg was doing his best not to cry, but he couldn't help himself. He did everything to come to hate him, but he couldn't.
After a while, Greg was able to regain control of himself.
" When I think that during all these years, I have sworn to myself never to do this again... "
Rusty smiled shyly at him.
" I think I have one more thing to teach you, after all. You thought you knew yourself well, but you didn't. I guess you've said this to yourself hundreds of times, right ?
Thousands of times.
Gruff, most of the time when you do this it's more to try to convince yourself rather than others. "
Greg didn't like it. But Rusty was right.
" You want to hate me. It's normal, and justified considering what I did to you. But whatever your civil status says, you will remain my child. We have a connection that allows us to go beyond hate. Which very often is just a weird and perverse way of showing interest in someone.
Ed told me a bit about that, yes.
I love you my son. This is something I dreamed of being able to finally tell you one day.
I...
No, don't speak. I don't deserve your consideration.
I know. The fact that... I'm glad to see you again doesn't imply that I've changed my opinion of you. I don't think I can ever forgive you for what you did. In fact, I am now more worried about my brother.
It's normal, he's from your family too. You haven't spoken to him yet...
No. And I think I really scared him.
Yes. It's time for you to go to him, don't you think ? "
Greg agreed. He put his shirt back on but left it open. He returned to the living room, followed by Rusty. Greg and Luke were still in the kitchen, the boy was finishing biting into the juicy burger. Fred and Greg swapped places. Luke was a little tense and nervous to be alone with the big rott for the first time, but since his father had told him he was his big brother, he tried to put on a good face anyway. Gradually, Luke relaxed, seeing that Greg was no longer in a bad mood. He was even smiling. He was speaking quietly to him and soon Luke wasn't content with monosyllables to answer Greg's questions. He looked at the empty plate.
" You ate everything, that's good. You were hungry, eh ? "
Greg was trying to have a warm, friendly voice to gain the little boy's trust, who in turn looked at him sideways. Knowing his father was nearby, he still felt safe in front of the colossus who had yelled at his father. Greg got up and opened the fridge, looking for dessert. He also looked at the freezer and found some ice cream in the back.
« Do you want a little ice cream to finish ?"
The little boy shook his head.
" Dad says it hurts your stomach and it's not good for your health. "
Greg smiled softly, showing off a chocolate ice cream, sure to make the little boy's eyes widen.
« He might be right, but why not be a bad guy for once, eh ?"
Luke smiles, holding out his hand. The prospect of disobeying was so tempting to him. The ice cream changed hands and the boy quickly tore the paper apart before freezing his lips on the ice cream, which drew a big smile from him. Operation seduction was on the right track.
Fred and Rusty were in the living room. Fred was tense because he was going through a situation he never expected to experience. He was alongside Greg's biological father. And the latter did not know that he was next to the man who was the cause of all this. Rusty looked at Fred to gauge him somewhat, also trying to figure out the mysteries of same-sex mutual attraction. He was sitting on the sofa again, resting his legs, which were seen to be tired. Fred remembered social conveniences and opened the bar.
« Will you... drink something ? "
Rusty could see the bar against the wall, loaded with bottles of liquor of varying strength. Some were tempting him but he shook his head.
" No thanks, it's too late for me. You... Were a soldier, as far as I knew ? "
Fred closed the bar.
" If you want water, tell me. Otherwise yes. I signed up for four years to pay for engineering studies. My contract ended not long ago. I just found a job.
- This is a good thing. You... have known my boy for a long time ? "
Fred dreaded this question. But he couldn't lie to the man who had come a long way to get back to his first child.
" I... will tell you the truth, sir. I am responsible for everything that happens here.
What do you mean ?
You do not know me. I have never seen you and yet it was I who caused it all. I've known Greg for almost 9 years. It is... me who sent the photos that started it all.
Photos...
The photos showing Greg giving a blowjob. It was me who took them.
It is... You ? But...
It's a long story. I acted out of stupid jealousy, and I still regret it today. "
Rusty looked at Fred quite incredulously. He had only known this man for a few tens of minutes and he was the cause of the whole story ?
« Why are you telling me this ?
Because it's the truth. I wanted to have Francis. The boy Greg gave pleasure to. I was young, silly and jealous. I had your number because Greg got it wrong when he tried to give me his. He told me that it often happened to him because they only differed by one digit.
Francis ? Francis ? But he was...
His hotshot, yes. Love and hate merge. I confessed everything to Greg from the start and he forgave me. But never since that day have I felt totally at peace. I do not know why. "
Rusty's gaze still weighed on Fred. He took the young man by the shoulders and stared at him.
" You are like me after all. You have done something very bad in the past, and you sincerely regret it. The only difference is that my son forgave you, and I haven't. And you love my boy too. In a different way from mine. But I see your love for him is genuine.
- It is. It took years before I realized it. Greg and I used to be just friends, but now I can't imagine living without him. "
Rusty hugged Fred. The latter didn't know what to do, but he accepted the hug.
" I lost the right to hate. I also understand the scope of your actions. But you don't have to blame yourself.
What do you mean ?
Have you got... forced my boy to do this ?
No.
So you are not responsible. You took these photos. But these photos wouldn't have existed if my boy hadn't... with his friend. You sent me enough to break my family. That's a fact. I don't like it, which is normal. But... In doing so, you also shattered the hypocritical world in which me and my boy lived. You have done wrong. But sometimes God has strange ways in our eyes to accomplish His will, so I will refrain from judging and condemning you. But I am sincere in telling you that I appreciate your honesty. And if despite this my boy grants you his love and his trust, then I am in his decision. "
Fred was still in Rusty's arms. And for the first time, he had just realized what he was missing. It wasn't Greg's forgiveness that he needed. Well, not only. He also had to have forgiveness from those he had hurt by acting this way.
The kitchen door opened then. Greg walked out, Luke asleep in his arms. The little boy had his head on his older brother 's shoulder, his mouth smeared with brown cream that stained the shirt. Rusty was charmed by the scene.
" You... can to make him sleep here ?
Yes, we have a spare bedroom.
I want you to do me this favor, Gruff. Luke hardly ever knew a house.
And you ?
I'm not asking for anything for myself, it's useless. And I will refuse anyway.
You can stay too...
Thank you but no. I want you to take care of your brother, Gruff. The two of you have so much in common. My little boy has stayed too long in shelters or temporary houses. "
Rusty had approached little Luke slowly. He kissed him softly on the cheek, being careful not to wake him up. He put his muzzle on his neck and inhaled the scent.
« Go to bed quickly now. I... Tomorrow I'll be there for him.
- It's the best for him, he can't take it anymore. "
Greg gave the little rott to Fred, who carried it to the guest room. Meanwhile, Rusty hugged Greg, placing his muzzle in his neck and also inhaling the scent of his oldest son.
" Tomorrow I will be there for him, as I always have been. In the meantime, take good care of him.
- Yes. "
Greg was reluctant to add "dad". He was torn between doing it or not. Rusty understood his hesitation and put on his coat and hat.
" Good bye, Gruff. "
Before Greg broke his hesitation, Rusty was already out. Greg stood staring at the closed door.
« Goodbye, dad... "
Then he went up to his room. He walked through the bedroom where Fred was facing the bed or Luke was sleeping. Not wanting to wake him up, he had just laid him down dressed on the bed and covered with a blanket.
" It's not the end of the day that I imagined this morning.
Me neither. But... I like it anyway.
Your... father come back to pick him up at what time ?
He didn't tell me. But that doesn't matter, we won't move from here.
Do you know what you're gonna do ?
No. Part of me wants to forgive, another refuses to do so. I need time to think about it. "
Fred took his friend's hand.
" It's time to go to bed. You have nothing against the fact of... postpone our little evening until tomorrow ?
I agree. Look at this little guy. Hey, can you imagine us one day with a child ? A little guy of ours, I mean ?
It happens to me, yes. Maybe not now, but someday, yes. "
Greg added nothing. He kissed Fred and the two went to their room, leaving Luke to his dreams.
-
The little boy woke up with a start. Opening his eyes, he felt that nothing was normal. He didn't knew where he was, he didn't felt his father's usual presence by his side. The unknown room he was in was almost pitch black. Frightened, he protected himself with the blanket, looking inside the room, gradually calming down. He then realized that he was still dressed. He remembered his last memory. It was... on the knees of a big rott. He had rested his head against the muscular chest and then... he had fallen asleep.
Luke relaxed. He was probably still in the house of his older brother and the other man. Speaking about this with his father, the latter had explained to him that the two men lived together, like a real couple. Luke knew that a couple was a mom and a dad. His father explained to him that sometimes a man would choose another rather than a woman. But that didn't mattered, because they loved each other the same way. It had seemed strange to him, but soon he paid no attention to it. The rott that his father had introduced to him as his big brother had scared him at first, but he was very kind afterwards. Luke liked him very much. He liked the idea of having a big brother. He was so tall and so strong. Luke already wanted to look like him later.
Luke stood up and looked down the hall. The moon gave him a little light and he guessed a door in the dark. He heard a snoring coming out of it. It was a relatively powerful sound. Less powerful than that of his father. Luke was reluctant to enter the room because he knew it was not polite to do so without an invitation. But he didn't want to be alone anymore.
He slowly opened the door. The little light that filtered through the Venetian blinds allowed him to see his older brother asleep, and the other gentleman by his side, in the same bed. He was reluctant to wake them up. He finally didn't feel the need and slowly climbed into bed. He lay down on the sheets. He could feel the warmth and the scent of the two men all around him. He felt good. He wondered where his father was, but he felt asleep again.
-
Fred was very surprised, upon waking up, to find Luke between himself and Greg. He hadn't felt him slip between the two men. Surprise quickly gave way to wonder at seeing the little rott's calm and relaxed face. He wasn't really surprised to hear a slight snore coming out of his throat. Really, Greg and Luke had a lot in common.
When he awoke in turn, Greg was even more delighted to see the little boy lying down. The sound of the shower roused Luke from his sleep and he saw Fred finish dressing as Greg came back from the bathroom, a large towel around his hips. Fred left the room and Greg began to dress in turn, making sure to turn his back on him at the right times.
« Say Luke, do you want to eat jam ?"
The boy smirked, nodding "yes". Greg was relieved. They didn't really have enough to serve the boy's breakfast, which is why Fred had gone to complete the pantry. Once dressed, Greg walked over to Luke and saw his need for a good bath. The boy welcomed this fact with some reluctance, but he finally accepted the idea of spending some time in the tub. Fred then returned, with something to feed the boy and something to pass the time too.
Greg looked outside every now and then, holding the dirty lunch plates. Fred was seated next to Luke who awkwardly slid his pencil over the wriggling piece of paper under the table, his tongue sticking out to try to apply. Greg walked back to the table.
« What are you drawing, Luke ? "
Greg could see the lines that looked like a boat, flying over what appeared to be waves. Luke looked at his brother.
« This is where we came with dad !"
Fred was smiling, enjoying hearing the joy in the little boy's voice. Greg was still looking outside. It was almost two now, and they still had no sign of Rusty.
The doorbell rang then, and Fred went to open it, Greg looking relieved. In front of Fred, two policemen were facing the door. The horses both wore the midnight blue uniform topped with the neon yellow chasuble flocked with the word "police", their helmets adorned with the silver badge, a radio microphone on the shoulder which occasionally spat out a call that did not was not intended for them.
" Mr. Miller ?
Uh no, I'm Fred Kaplan. What's going on ?
I'm Constable Hamilton and this is Agent Victoria. Is Mr. Miller here ?
Yes, come in. "
The police entered. Luke turned his head and seemed seized with instant fear. Seeing this, one of the policemen smiled at him, which didn't appease the boy. Fred walked over and calmed the child with a hand on his shoulder.
Something was wrong, Greg stepped forward, coming back from the kitchen.
" Mr. Miller ?
Yes ?
Can we talk to you for a bit ? "
Luke looked at the police. He saw that the latter felt uncomfortable in his presence.
" Of course. Fred... "
Fred gave Luke a hug and led him to his room. The boy didn't protest, still looking at the agents. he must have had to deal with the police in his early childhood.
" I'm sorry, Mr. Miller, but I'm afraid I will bring bad news. Do you recognize this ? "
The policeman presented Greg an old gray hat. The latter opened his eyes in terror.
" This is... My father's hat... What is... WHAT HAPPENED ?
- A patrol spotted a suspicious package on a bridge over the Thames. They were in fact old clothes. But their disposition... Everything indicates that... Everything leads to fear that... the wearer of these clothes went... thrown into the river. "
The agent spoke quietly trying to put the most tact and compassion in his voice.
" No... "
Greg felt an unspeakable fear seize him, not taking his eyes off the hat. It was indeed the one worn by his father the day before.
" We found a key in a pocket with the Salvation Army emblem on it. There was also a piece of paper with your name and address, which is why we came here. Colleagues are in the process of... "
The policeman was interrupted by a call on his radio. He isolated himself for a moment then he came back to Greg.
" There is news. Would you like to accompany us to the social center ?
- I... Yes of course ! "
Greg didn't know what to think anymore. He was mortally worried. He couldn't imagine the worst. There had to be another explanation. He followed the police, climbing in the back.
The police car quickly arrived in the center of Downley. Fred had stayed with Luke, trying as best he could to reassure him.
Greg entered the shelter. The interior housed a wooden counter to the left of the entrance, the right of the room being dotted with tables and chairs, now empty, meal time having passed. Only the strong smell of community soup remained in the air. Behind the counter, an elderly feline in old clothes was trying to hold back tears. A middle-aged woman also tried to console him, as sad as the latter, the blouse adorned with a crucifix. Another, tall, faced the counter on the far wall.
Two other police officers were at the scene. One of the policemen held a letter in his hand. The nun was crying as she read hers again, one hand over her mouth. Before he could question himself, the second policeman gave him a letter with his name on it. Greg opened it. He didn't think anymore, shutting himself off to protect himself. He walked into the room, his eyes fixed on the letter. He opened it, turning his back and leaning against the wall, breathing deep.
As he read it, he felt his strength abandon him. He kept a straight face but his eyes were shining brighter and brighter.
"Gruff. I don't want you to feel responsible. My decision was taken a long time ago. By the time you read this, I will be facing my Creator for all my sins and for all the crimes I may have committed against you and others. Holding you in my arms was a moment of unique happiness for me. But my fate was sealed from the start. Seeing you again will have been a great joy and I hope the Lord will allow me to keep this memory of you in my arms once I have joined him for my judgment. I entrust you with the care of your little brother. I know you can take care of him as well as I tried to. Even better, because you have with you a man who loves you and who will support you. One last time, Gruff, I sincerely regret the harm I did to you. Tell my little Luke that I will keep my promise to him yesterday. I am now by his side, and yours, forever. I love you. "
Greg's voice was neutral when he could finally speak, looking at the letter in his hand. He could only say a short, almost inaudible sentence.
" I forgive you. "
Greg was still looking at the letter, tears finally streaming down both of his cheeks, his voice now broken. His eyes were on the large crucifix on the wall, the letter crumpled in his hand.
« DID YOU HEAR ME, BASTARD ? I LOVE HIM ! I FORGIVE HIM ! "
Greg couldn't hold back, the letter firmly in his fist. Around him, no one could hold back either as Greg cried bitter tears.
-
The police escorted Greg home. He went upstairs, leaving an old backpack with the boy's rare clothes on the floor. It seemed that Luke had understood without being explained anything to him. The boy was lying on his side on his bed, his eyes filled with tears. Fred was sitting awkwardly trying to try to console the boy. Greg confirmed the news with a nod of his head. Fred closed his eyes in sadness before giving way to his lover. Sensing his brother's presence, Luke threw himself into his arms and the two tried to comfort each other.
« Luke..."
The boy remained silent.
" I am sorry... For your daddy... "
Luke still wasn't speaking.
" I wanted to tell you... "
Greg looked Fred in the eye for a moment.
" Dad... his request... to take care of you, Luke... "
The little guy was still silent, but he was looking at his big brother now. Fred had understood. He was smiling sadly. Greg didn't need to ask him. It was so natural. And so normal. The rest would wait.
Greg took Fred's hand and squeezed it as hard as he could.
-
Once Luke got out of the tub, Greg made sure to quickly cover him with a warm towel, trying not to hurt him as he dried him off. His gestures were hesitant but he learned to apply the right force in order to be gentle and efficient. Once dry, the boy found himself wearing one of his t-shirts, a thousand times too big. The garment covered him completely, down to the feet. The little guy would have to wait until the next day to have a nightgown that fits him. Greg's voice was soft, still broken with grief.
« Is that understood Luke ? It's for tonight only. "
The boy nodded a little "yes" before exiting the bathroom, walking barefoot to his brother's bedroom, slipping under the sheets of the double bed. Greg left and came back dressed in turn for the night, taking the left seat. A few minutes later, Fred returned, switching off his phone, leaving Mark in his new mourning, also preparing for the night before heading back downstairs to finalize some research. The two men used to sleep naked but tonight they would of course make an exception to this rule.
Greg and Luke were already asleep when Fred finally came upstairs to join them. He took his place in the bed. Luke was right up against his big brother. But when Fred lay down, without waking up, he shifted his position and leaned against his body. Greg doesn't react. Fred was looking at the little rott, smiling. He brought his muzzle to his ear and whispered his feeling to him.
" My... son... »
-
Rusty walked for half an hour. His footsteps echoed softly on the ancient cobblestones of the west end road. The lampposts were scattered and occasionally allowed faint stars to shine in Rusty's eyes. Arrived in front of the Tesco store, of course closed at this late hour, he returned to the social center where he had had a bed for a few weeks. The guard, who recognized him, opened the door for him. He was surprised not to see the little boy, but Rusty explained to him that he had let him spend the night with his elder bro. He asked him for three sheets of paper and something to write on. Rusty settled down on a table and spent the next hour writing. Then he put the sheets in three envelopes, which he placed in his locker. The night was already well advanced but he asked to go out again, arguing that there was a last visit to be made. The guard warned him that he was going to have to leave too. Rusty reassured him, explaining that he had a meeting, and that by morning, everything would be settled. He smiled one last time at the guard as he left the foyer.
Rusty pulled up the collar of his coat and started walking. It was almost the beginning of spring, but if the days could be hot, the nights still remained cold. He walked for two hours. During this time, he joined the banks of the Thames, at the level of Eton. During his stay, he had studied the place. He walked to the Southlea Road bridge. The area was deserted at this late hour. During his walk, he had only passed about ten vehicles. The bridge was not very big, but in this season it didn't mattered. Silently, lit by the moon, he undressed, stacking his clothes, putting his hat on top. Naked, he climbed onto the parapet and turned his back to the river. He internally thanked God for never having learned to swim. After invoking the Lord's mercy for the ultimate sin he was about to commit, he thanked him for allowing him to take with him the scent and fragrance of his two children in his last memory of this world.
Rusty closed his eyes. Then he let himself fall back. He hit the cold black water head first, knocking him unconscious. The cold gripped him, plunging him deeper into unconsciousness. His eyes were closed and he was wearing a tired smile.
--
Completely naked, still sweaty, his back leaning against the wooden wall which dressed the walls all around the locker room hollowed out with niches which housed the players' belongings, Greg was resting. With his feet on the ground, rubbing his toes against the cool, white, streaked tiled floor to prevent slipping, Greg sighed in delight, occasionally glancing distractedly at the mosaic tile of the team's prickly wasp on the ground, catching his breath after the long training session. He barely noticed the Australian black bear greeting him as he walked out of the room. He barely raised his hand to greet him, too tired.
On the other hand, Franck took care to tie his large towel well on his hips. Nudity didn't normally bother him, but he knew he was a prime target for Greg, and he didn't want to give him any new reasons to make dirty remarks about him.
Greg, opening one eye, also made no secret of his interest in a body so beautifully highlighted by the residual moisture. Frank made up his mind, going to his locker room, being careful to turn his back on Greg and quickly put on underpants.
« Aren't you showering ? "
Frank was looking over his shoulder. Greg smirked more sharply and Frank hurried to add a
« No, don't answer please, forget I asked a question..."
which underlined his fear of seeing Greg actually answering the question and of revealing a part of private life that he did not want to know at any price. It seemed like Greg got it because his response was quick.
« No, I'm just having a break, I'm dead tired, I'll go after."
Greg then put his bare feet on the bench, indifferent to his genitals which now hung for all to see.
« Are the nights difficult ? "
Frank smirked, now just shirtless, drying off his upper body.
« How do you guys do it ?
How do we do about what ?
With the kids. I can barely keep up with Luke... This kid is full of energy, it is impossible for us to spend a single minute not having to watch him out of the corner of our eyes... "
So that was it. Frank smiled, shaking his head.
" We do like everyone else. We deal with it. This is how we straight people deal with the problem. By following the movement and hoping not to be dumped... "
Franck had put on his shirt and now considered himself safe from Greg's concupiscence.
He approached his colleague and friend and sat down on the bench, looking at him, however, with his legs apart. The retort he hoped to avoid came all the same.
« Do you know this is how bad gay porns starts ? Two naked guys in a locker room... "
Greg was chuckling to himself. Franck seemed to get used to it, remaining in place when before he would have found an excuse to flee.
" So I won't ask how the good ones start then. Seriously Greg, does that undermine you so much ? "
Greg was silent long enough for him to think.
" I imagine I will have more stamina over time.
- I imagine so. My kid is only 4 months old you know. And yours is 5, right ? "
Greg whispered his answer.
" Yes... "
Frank noticed that he was hesitating and had no confidence in his answer. He shook his head, coming back closer to Greg.
« Dude, I know you don't know that yourself, right ? "
Greg looked at his friend, his head still glued to the wooden wall, his gaze shifty. Frank's was even more questioning. Greg knew he was going to have to play tight.
" Well... "
Frank chuckled in turn.
« What father doesn't know his kid's date of birth ? Those unworthy, or those who are not... "
Greg's gaze was even more elusive.
« Come on man, what's the real story ? And who is this kid ? "
Greg bit his lip.
« Dude, I can't imagine anything creepy or downright disgusting behind it, but honestly, shutting up is helping dirty rumors to spread. "
Greg sighed, rubbing his eyes.
" I know. But I don't want to cause more trouble. You can be reassured about something. There is nothing disgusting behind it. Nothing at all. But...
But ?
But I don't want to say too much either. You could get in trouble for complicity. "
Frank didn't seem surprised. Which surprised Greg.
« Come on man, who's going to believe for a moment this story of an immigrant surrogate mother who you made a kid to spin her money ? I know you have a good background Greg, but it's not possible for a second that you did this for your 18th birthday ! "
Greg blushes. His story of justifying Luke's arrival at his house didn't hold up for a minute when you thought about it. He sighed again. He didn't felt like revealing everything but after all Frank had trusted him about his illness. Greg owed him that much.
« I don't want to reveal too much but you deserve to know the heart of the matter.
So he's not your son.
No. Luke is my brother. "
Frank looked at his friend, dumbfounded, surprised, relieved too.
" It's far from being a simple story.
Greg, if he's your little brother, why the secret ?
We tried to make things easier for him. You haven't had an easy life, Frank, with your shot father and your mother you just buried. "
Frank closed his eyes of devotion for a moment.
" I knew it. I knew mom was waiting to see her grandson before letting herself go. She wanted to see him at least once.
She must have been an admirable woman.
It is below the truth. But continue. "
Greg wet his lips, talking faster about a part of his life he wanted to forget.
« My... progenitors kicked me away the day they found out I was gay. My uncle took me in without saying a word, without hesitation, and then I officially became his son. "
Frank listened silently. He vaguely knew the story but hearing it now made him understand Greg's emotions.
" Not long ago, I was surprised to see my... father knocking at my door. Frank, you can't imagine how much I went through during this time. I was torn between the urge to throw him in the street, to simply beat him up, to shut the door in his face. And yet... A small part of me was glad to see him again. "
Frank cocked his right ear in surprise.
" The man who rejected me was standing in front of me, with the little boy next to him. Fred cleared up the situation. He convinced me to listen to him and the more he spoke to me, the more I blamed myself. He had changed, Frank. He had evolved but above all, he had paid the price for his choices. He had lost everything. All his money but worse, he had lost his wife. "
Greg paused. Frank understood that he was talking about his mother, also dead.
" I will never forgive her. Not to her. Not after what she told me. Not after daddy didn't hide anything from me as she was still like this day. "
Greg paused again. He couldn't say anything more, his eyes clouding with tears. Frank let him take control of himself.
Greg resumed after a few minutes.
" It's something I'll regret all my life, Frank. Not having had the courage to tell him. To have let my pride deprive me forever of the possibility of telling him to his face that I forgave him. "
Frank in turn felt his emotions rise in him. he nodded, his eyes starting to shine.
" Luke is my brother and my dad came here for the same reason your mom did. He wanted to see me one last time before to die. "
Frank was surprised.
" Dad caught a dirty bug and he had no more time to live. He left me the kid, telling me that he would come back the next day, but in truth, he threw himself into the flooding river. We buried an empty coffin when we realized we would never find him. "
Frank was looking at Greg, his eyes fixed on him, his hands on his knees, a little ashamed that he had brought this recent painful past back to Greg.
« Why then... say he's your son ? "
Greg smiled.
" To make things easier. You know, my dad came here illegally. He traveled almost clandestinely. Moreover, Luke had no legal existence.
It is true ?
Yes. He was never recorded. Saying than he's my son was the easiest way to give him a name, an identity, a nationality by preventing him from being locked up in an orphanage for years before the administrations decided on his case.
How did you do it ? "
Greg chuckled a little.
« Hey, let's say I know a guy for who that kind of problem isn't a problem. Luke gets used to calling me "daddy". He actually likes it. Same for Fred. In any case, I will not dwell on the question so that you can plead ignorance if we ever get caught by the cops. "
Frank grimaced in his turn, getting up, followed by Greg who grabbed a towel, neglecting as usual to hide himself on his way to the shared showers.
Frank was heading for the exit.
" Thank you, Greg. I can hardly imagine how difficult it was to tell me this. But I have to go. Dinah will kill me if I'm late again. See you for the last game ? "
Greg smiled, turning around, naked, giving Frank a friendly hug who gently tried to pull himself away, hoping no one would see him like that.
" If I'm counting correctly, you have 7 games left before you hang up.
If we go to the championship final, yes.
Man, I promise you, for your last game, I'll go all out with the Eagles. You deserve to leave with a big fireworks display ! "
Frank smiles, flattered, also happy to be away from Greg's cock.
« In return, we will eliminate you with panache ! "
Greg took up the challenge with pride.