FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

(4:00 EST)

The stream begins. Harry the Hawk, Supermascot Rocky the Mountain Lion and Clutch the Bear stand in the middle of a rec center. The 3 of them are smiling, if a bit nervous about how the stream may go, but happy and full of enthusiasm.

This is the happiest they'll be on stream.

"Hello everyone!" Harry the Hawk begins. He has a decently deep voice. "Welcome to the stream! This is a very special stream, as it's a charity fundraiser for the cause of (insert charity of your choice here). And I brought two of my best friends along for this ride. Rocky-"

"Hey." Rocky waves. His voice is even deeper than Harry's.

"-and Clutch."

"Hello!" Clutch greets the audience, his voice higher pitched than Harry and Rocky's, but still pretty decent on the "balls dropped" scale.

"The idea here is simple! You make a one time donation to the charity at the link below, Rocky if you will..." Rocky, holding a laptop, presses a button, and the link pops up on screen. "You can donate however much you want. All proceeds will go to charity, one hundred percent, nothing taken off the top. We do have charity incentives though! Starting with:" Rocky presses a button on the laptop again, and the charity incentives appear.

"At $25, you can...." Harry pauses. Was... was he reading this right? "At $25, you can select one of us three to get kicked in the groin by one of these kids."

Harry, Rocky and Clutch look at each other, confused. These were not the charity incentives they came up with.

"But there aren't any-" Clutch begins, but is cut off by a group of kids wearing shirts bearing the logo of (insert charity here) enter the rec center. "Oh..."

Clutch's legs are already instinctively buckling together protectively.

"At $50 bucks, select one of us to get a wedgie... at $75 bucks, select one of us to... rack ourselves on the balance beam." The trio turn around to look at the balance beam... suddenly it has a much more menacing aura to it. All 3 of them gulp. Harry's hands slowly drift to cover his crotch. "Hehehe. Sounds like fun." That last bit was in the intro Harry had rehearsed, but where as it was meant to be genuine and exciting, now Harry couldn't manage more than a very blatantly nervous and worried fake laugh and smile.

Rocky walks over and whispers into Harry's ear. "Should we stop and change the incentives back to what we had in mind?"

"I-" Harry was going to respond, but is suddenly cut off by the chime of a donation. It was a $50 donation from one "RickyDicky777", with a very simple message.

"Crush those birdseeds with a wedgie!"

"Oh..." Harry feels his heart sink. He then sees a rec center staff member walking over to him. "No, wait can we talk this-" Before he can even finish his sentence, the staff member grabs the back of his britches, and gives a good YANK "-ouUOOGAHHH!" His voice instantly ascends up the pitch ladder. His face contorted into a humorous visage of pain and humiliation. The kids present all burst out into laughter at the sight of the bird's face as his eggs are crushed by the fabric of his own undies. "OH MY... NO NO ZONE!"

Rocky and Clutch wince in sympathy at the sight. (Though Rocky seriously has to wonder who calls it the no no zone?) The staff member lets go, letting the elastic snap back into place. Harry clutches himself, sinking to his knees in pain. "Holy shi-" Clutch begins, but is cut off by another donation notif, this one was $25, coming from an anonymous user, simply reading. "Kick Clutch in the dick!"

Without hesitation, a kid breaks from the group and gets a running start towards the bear. "Wait, please!" Clutch shouts, backing up in fear. But to no avail, as he gets a kick directly to his no no zone. "GUUUHHHH!" His eyes immediately go cross, and he hunches over. He stays frozen in that position for a bit, before finally falling down and moving to hold himself. "Everything... is terrible." He mutters in a high pitched voice. "Oh my penis..."

Rocky's heart rate increases. He is the last one. Knowing hia cliches, that meant very soon, he would be-

ping

...next.

Sure enough, when Rocky looks at the screen of the laptop he's holding, he sees a notification for a $75 donation, from an "EccentricHyena", stating "Hey Rocky, it's time for your nutcracker performance!"

"Please no." Rocky mutters under his breath. "I'll donate more if it means not having to-" But Rocky was already being ushered towards the balance beam by a staff member.

Harry, who was able to stand again, took the laptop from him.

Rocky stares down the balance beam, it's menacing aura more present than ever. "...you've done this before Rocky." He places a foot on the balance beam. "Just get it over with." He steps up onto the beam with his other foot, balancing precariously. OK, Rocky had experience with this, and he knew a trick or two to dampen the pain. He would just need to do it. On the count 3. 1...2...

bump

The staff member kicked the balance beam, causing the supermascot to lose his balance and, without preparation, fall directly on his supernuts. "AHHHHHH!" He lets out an impressive soprano cry. Unfortumately for Rocky, he was caught off guard and took the full brunt of the low blow. The painful, painful low blow. "Oh... that smarts." He whimpers, sliding off and falling down and going boom.

The chorusbof kids cheers again.

Harry looks at the clock on the laptop.

It is 4:10 EST.

They were going to 10:00 EST.

It was going to be a long day.