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Ridley and Raina Take A Detour

Saturday, 11AM. It was a pretty warm morning in the county of Wolf Rock. It largely consisted of a cluster of quiet suburbs surrounded by dense forest. Not too crowded, not too empty. The people found their forest-side location to be very appealing, as it allowed for many activities as well as giving them a sense that they were closer to nature, quite literally. Some followed religions that revolved around forestry and so their position was even more significant for them.

In the southwestern-most of these suburban communities, a beat-up old car was chugging along one of the residential roads. Its owner, and current driver, was a female badger/red panda hybrid. She looked fairly frustrated with the state of her vehicle, jumping every time it stuttered and occasionally smacking the steering wheel with her sharp-clawed hands.

"Come on, you piece of shit... All you've got to do is get us to the mall." She grumbled.

Another voice rather smugly replied, "How long have I been telling you to get this repaired? Or, better yet, get a new car?"

The red panda narrowed her eyes at her feline friend in the passenger seat. "Oh, sure. Like we have the money for that. And even if we did have the cash, I can think of a million other things I'd rather spend the money on."

"Like what?"

"Like a gemstone-studded hip flask." The driver said back nonchalantly, leaving the cat next to her to give her a deadpan look.

The rather fluffy beige-furred girl murmured, "A gemstone-studded hip flask... Ridley, do you know what 'priorities' are?"

"As if you'd spend that much money any better than I would... I doubt you'd have any cash left over for the car once all that wrestling gear shit arrived." Ridley countered, making sure to keep her eyes on the road and shifted the car up a gear. "Raina Maine, the next Andre the Giant..."

Raina rolled her deep purple eyes, resting her head on her fist and turning to look out the grubby window, watching the houses fly by slower than the pair would like. She used her free hand to help her count as she explained, "Okay, bitch. One, I can't drive, so why would I be buying a car? Two, I've got enough wrestling gear, thank you very much. If anything, I should start selling off my fat clothes now summer's coming. Won't need them for a long while."

"... Until this winter?" The orange and black-furred anthro asked her rhetorically, taking a right turn. "And you say I'm the one making stupid decisions..."

A few moments passed, Ridley deep in thought. Suddenly, she gasped, and a sly smile crept across her muzzle. "Speaking of..."

"Speaking of what?" The Maine Coon cat blinked, adjusting her dark-blue glasses as she turned to face her friend once more.

Raina gestured left with a finger. "Wait, where are you taking us? The mall's that way."

The red panda was eerily silent. She adjusted her ripped denim jacket, coated in anarchy badges, which was enough of a hint to make Raina get a sense of dread. Ridley was going to do something stupid, and she knew it.

The fluffy cat sighed. "... Whatever you're going to do, please think of the car, alright? I think if one more leaf lands on the roof the brakes will stop working."

"The car will be fine, mother." Ridley answered, the last word dripping with sarcasm.

Ridley went back a gear, slowing the car down slightly. Then, she began peering out over the dashboard at the quiet street ahead, lined with shrubbery and grand houses. She was looking for something.

"So, are you going to tell me what you're going to do now? Make it quick. The food court is calling me and there's a burrito with my name on it..." Raina slipped a hand down to her exposed midriff, softly clenching it as her stomach grumbled.

The driver's grin grew ever wider, reaching for something down by her feet.

"There's some asshole rich kid on this street. Barnes. Got done for tax evasion a few weeks ago, remember? We were supposed to have our roads repaved-" Ridley swore as the car hit a pothole, "-but the council couldn't find the funds. And I'm thinking that this dickhead is directly responsible."

"You think that one possum not paying their taxes has that much of a direct impact on our community? Not that the treasurer's just shit at managing funding?"

"In a big city? No. In Wolf Rock? Fuck yeah it does." Ridley nodded, slowing the car down even more as she talked. "How much do you think that guy makes?"

"No idea. I don't follow this stuff as religiously as you do."

"He's a sleazy lawyer for this mortgage company. Huge money. Tons of cheques coming in. And he doesn't deserve a penny of it. Let's make his life more difficult..." The red panda fished a baseball bat out from under her seat. "Kitty, do you think he likes to read his mail...?"

Raina's eyes widened almost instantly, and she took on the persona of a scolding parent. "No. No no no. I'm not getting involved with your rich-eating vigilante bullshit again! It's broad daylight, he's bound to have security cameras outside his house, and I still have nightmares about last time!"

"If you had just did what I said last time, nothing bad would have happened." Unlike her feline friend, Ridley didn't raise her voice. It seemed like she was used to this level of opposition.

"Egging a police car? Wonderful idea."

"Should have been stealthier..." Ridley mumbled in a song-song voice.

"We could have been arrested!"

"But it was fun, wasn't it? You said so yourself!"

Raina huffed and crossed her arms, blushing. "... Maybe."

"So... You in?" The red panda questioned, raising an eyebrow.

The short-haired feline turned away from her once again, murmuring something indecipherable.

"What was that?" Ridley teased.

"Just make it quick. And fuck off with that."

The shorter anthro laughed at that, but she knew when she needed to stop. She rolled down the driver's side window and stuck her head out of it. Ridley mouthed the ever-decreasing number of mailboxes flying past them, readying the bat with one hand while keeping the steering wheel steady

with the other.

"Liftoff in T-minus ten... nine... eight..."

"Could you be any less inconspicuous about what you're doing?"

Raina's complaint fell on deaf ears as the red panda neared the end of her countdown.

"Three..."

She readied her batting arm.

"Two..."

The fluffy cat opposite her put her hands over her own face, watching through her fingers out of morbid curiosity.

"One..."

The bat was out of the window now.

"Ignition!" Ridley hollered, swerving to the opposite side of the road and swinging at the mailbox as hard as she could without losing control of her vehicle. It came clean off its post, flying a good fifteen feet through the air before falling onto the lawyer's neighbour's lawn. She swerved back to the right side of the road as quickly as she could, cheering as she drove now.

Raina let out a sigh of relief. It was over, and her friend managed to not fall out of the window which was a bonus.

The red panda hybrid took a break from her cheering to ask her friend, "Now, how about getting some lunch to celebrate?"

"We were going to do that anyway. Oh, and after that stunt, you're paying." The cat smirked, enjoying the sight of her friend's expression falter.