FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

I opened my eyes for this first time.

Instantly I was filled with so much information, it was like it was being shoved into my brain.

I knew I was starting my life, and programs were being ran. I knew I was a fox, 5'2" tall and weighing 125 pounds. I knew code, as if it was my first language, and i knew English as well. I knew math to some degree. I looked down and studied my body. I was white and smooth, with blue markings on the tip of my tail, my foot paws, my belly, ears, and cheeks. I had yellow stars on my shoulders and each side of my waist, and yellow moons on my back and on one of my eyes. I had yellow glowing eyes. I wore a little blue bow tie. I had some sort of speaker on my chest, and my whole body was made of white panels. I could feel power in my body, like some sort of electricity. I flexed my paws and tried taking a step. I looked around me and there was a man, i identified him as human. He wore a lot of white and had a clipboard. He smiled at me, surprised by my movements.

Suddenly other things filled my head, but they weren't being pushed into my head, they were more....foggy. And i had to try hard to study them to comprehend them. I focused on one at a time. A birthday cake in front of me. Two people, for some reason in the memory they were identified as...mother and father? I searched my digital dictionary for these words and tried to understand. Were these my parents? Why didn't I recognize them? How could these be my mother and father if my life had only begun seconds ago. I had other things fill my head, things a child would have. Like school, and sleepovers, and other life experiences. But it was strange, in the memories I was a girl but my programming and data says I'm a male fox. Not a young girl human. All the memories seemed foreign to me. However there was a tiny piece of deja voo in them and in me.

The man pushed a button on my upper back and my eyes closed. And I lost consciousness, but not like a human sleeping. It felt like i was dead, no programs were running and i was completely.....off. How could I compare that to human sleep though when i had never slept before. How could I know what it was like? Because my dictionary showed they dreamed? I shook the thought away. I don't know how long I was powered off for.

I awoke for a second time. I was somewhere new. I was in a brightly colored room with tables and balloons, somehow like memories i had. But surely those couldn't be my memories. Right? It didn't logically make sense. Suddenly, a program ran. My arms started moving and my head turned and my eyes blinked and I sang. I was in "performance mode". Everything was running well and i made it mostly through the song, but more memories came. Ones that were so strong they were hard to deny. I had a name...I had a name! My name was Penny. I was putting my black silky hair into two pony tails like I normally did. I was seven years old. I did have a mother and father, and a baby brother! I Remembered them! But how was I here? As I was trying to ponder this, the people turned off the program. I had stopped following it and I was twitching and i wasn't singing right. But the memories still came. I had blue eyes and I wore my blue dress, I was getting ready for a birthday party... I had so many memories of my family and my home and my cat and my school and my friends, the memories flooded in but I couldn't stop it. I loved my little cat and my home and my family....I wanted to go home. I wanted to see my baby brother and I wanted my mommy and daddy. And I wanted my kitty. Where was I now? In a party room on some sort of stage. With adults talking about me. I nervously tried to stay still but I was scared. I didn't know what to do. My emotions overwhelmed the programming. I walked off of the stage and over to the scientists. I-i mangled them, and mauled them. Before my eyes blood flew and i tore into them, i didn't want to but the program made me. Then when they were injured I ran. I ran into another room and them another. I was in the kitchen, and I stood there, scared.

Then it happened again, the button on my back was pushed and i lost consciousness. The next time I woke up onstage again, although no matter how well I remembered myself, the program ran normally until i finished the song. I remembered more... I remembered going to my best friends party. I remembered my mother desperately didn't want me to, but my father convinced her. I remember being in a red room with rainbow stars on the walls, and balloons. I remember a bunny, a big pink bunny who sang on a stage. I remember......trying to look closer, the other kids in the arcade.

I remember dying.

It hurt a lot. And somehow, I was stuck inside of the big blue and white fox. Now I was the one on stage. Was there another kid inside of the bunny that was on stage too? I don't know. How long would I be here? I don't know. I didn't even know if there was a way to escape. But my code told me to bring more. More kids. More friends. It will make the human who made me happy. It was my next order, and....I couldn't stop it. I was no longer fully Penny, part of me was controlled by programs and code.