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THOMAS THE TANK ENGINE

CARTOON SERIES

DOUBLE-LENGTH EPISODE #2

THE PIRATE ADVENTURE

Part 1

© GULLANE (THOMAS) LIMITED 2021

© 2021 JOEY MORLEY LIMITED

Pre-Intro:

*Episode opens in a darkened captain's quarters with Brock, an African Gray Parrot and Mary, a black sheep gazing nervously at something sitting at the desk.*

Mary: So cap'n, those pirates can't have gone far.

Voice: No, Mary. It gets far worse. No living man has ever attempted to catch the treasure we're hunting for. If they did, they'd be struck on their necks and

leaving only their heads for the buzzards.

Brock: But... cap'n...

Voice: But WHAT, Brock? Make it worth my time.

Brock: We... can't be the only best pirates around. There could be someone else.

Voice: And who might that be?

Brock: We don't know, cap'n. All we know is, they might not be pirates at all. Just... stowaways.

Voice: That is the stupidest thing in all my years as a pirate have ever heard.

Mary: But... Brock's right, cap'n. What if there IS someone better than us?

Voice: They won't be swashbuckling with us, Mary. We're the top of the class and we get what we find...

*End of Pre-Intro*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 1:

*Episode starts at Brendam Docks where Thomas and the Steam Team are boarding a rail ferry.*

Narrator: One fine sunny morning at Brendam Docks. Thomas and the Steam Team were boarding a rail ferry. They were going to a railway on the mainland to help out.

Thomas: Oh boy! Isn't this so exciting? Going to the mainland, I've been going there more times than I've counted.

Gordon: *sighs* Aren't we all, Thomas?

Edward: Now now, Gordon. I know you're not *ahem* "dignified" to work on some of these lines but you have to accept the fact you're working on them wherever you like it or not.

Gordon: I know, Edward. I like going to most different railways away from Sodor. But having to go with Thomas is just going to be one big nightmare for me.

*Just then, Percy shoots past eager to get on the railferry too.*

Percy: Wait for me, Thomas! I'm coming too!

Gordon: *sighs* See what I mean?

Edward: Come on, Gordon. They're only little engines. They'll still do the work even if they're hyper or not.

Joey: But not as hyper as my dog who tends to spin around like an "immature puppy" whenever she gets fed.

Gordon: *chuckles* Joey's spittin' facts, here!

Joey: Thanks, Gordon. Now come on, get going! You've got tourist trains to pull.

Gordon: Indeed I do! See you around, Joey!

*Gordon boards the railferry and Edward follows. Eventually, the other Steam Team members steam onto the railferry.*

Emily: Now, Henry. I want you to hold it in when we're out at sea. You know what happened last time, do you?

Henry: Yes, Emily. I know. I'll be careful.

James: We're NOT going out to the middle of the ocean, guys. Besides, we're only going around the channel to get to where we need to go.

Percy: Thomas, could you remind us where we're going again?

Thomas: Alright, Percy. We're going to the Dartmouth Steam Railway near Devon to help fill in for an engine shortage.

Percy: Okay.

Joey: Now... are you sure you've got everything, guys? Spare parts, gold dust, coal and water, etc.

Thomas: Yep. We're all ready.

Joey: Alright then.

*Just then, the railferry's hooter blows and Joey eventually runs off to join The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt), Salty and Porter to wave the engines off.*

Thomas: Dartmouth, HERE WE COME!

*The railferry leaves the docks and sets sail for its destination.*

Joey: Goodbye, guys. Be good!

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): If anything goes wrong, me or Joey will be able to help you out.

*The Steam Team blow their whistles and say their goodbyes as they set sail on their long voyage.*

Porter: Look at 'em. Going around the channel to Dartmouth. What lucky engines!

Salty: Arrr... I wouldn't say they're lucky, me hearties.

Joey: What do you mean, Salty?

Salty: Weather forecast says there'll be a nasty gale blowin' around the channel tonight, a wee mighty storm. The likes of which I've witnessed before, arrgh.

Joey: But do you think they'll be alright?

Salty: Arrgh, who knows. Joey, me heartie. Maybe they might. If all else fails, they still have their supply of gold dust to find their way home.

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Salty's right, Joey. If they get lost at sea. They can always teleport back to the Magic Railroad and rest there.

Joey: I suppose so.

Narrator: But Salty was right about a storm brewing that night, as the engines were the last to find out.

*Scene cuts to the railferry at sea where the engines are on their long voyage.*

Donald: So... um... how long is this voyage going to take?

Rebecca: Beats me, it might take days.

Gordon: Don't be silly... a trip across the sea doesn't take days.

Douglas: Och aye, unless it was a REALLY far away place, laddie.

Gordon: Yes indeed, Douglas. But for this voyage I'd say... one or two days.

Percy: This almost feels like going on a Big World Adventure. Eh, Thomas?

Thomas: Yeah, it does feel like a Big World Adventure. But this is only the beginning of our voyage, we're going to a place by the sea.

Duck: A Great Western line, that is.

James: Oh, don't you start about your Great Western boastings please, Duck. Especially on a long sea trip.

Thomas: And PLEASE don't start squabbling out of boredom, guys. We are just getting started, you know.

Percy: We are?

Thomas: Of course we are. I mean, why wouldn't we be?

*singing* We're on a trip to a place far away.

We're on a railferry, leaving today.

But as we speak we should probably mention

we're the really useful steaming engines.

We'll cross the sea, to our own destination.

we'll arrive at their own station.

Useful, splendid and good-hearted,

We're just getting started!

*speaking* See what I mean?

Percy: Oh, of course! We just left for the ocean waves.

James: And we wouldn't want to spoil it for anyone, if you know what I mean.

Edward: *singing* Let's hold on tight, we're all going for a riding.

There's no need to go into hiding.

Percy: *singing* There will be smiles and a not alot of frowns

whilst we're all bobbing up and down.

James: *singing* We're all going to a place called Dartmouth

staying in their engine house.

Gordon: *singing* But please wait until I've farted.

We're just getting started!

*The engines start coughing and groaning.*

Gordon: *speaking* Hey! Don't look at me! I've been holding it in since we left.

Henry: *singing* Oh, please don't play tricks, 'cos I'm feeling quite seasick.

So I'll probably be throwing up my gob. *vomits over the side of the boat.*

Duck: *singing* They have a place called Paignton and it's gonna be quite fun.

As they'll find a really perfect suiting job.

Toby: *singing* The old Dartmouth Steam Railway is the place we're going to be

My face is going to shine just like a beam.

Emily: *singing* But we'll all stick together in a bright and sunny weather.

As we're all known as the Steam Team!

Nia: *singing* Sunshine and freshly breezes blowing in our faces

Whilst we all pull our trains into speedy paces.

Rebecca: *singing* This, I gurantee, will be a huge ton of fun

whilst we're working under the hot sun.

Oliver: *singing* Paignton and Dartmouth are the places we will be,

as we'll see the sand and sea!

Steam Team: *singing* We're looking forward to the station we're departing

We're just getting started!

Thomas: *speaking* This is going to be SO MUCH FUN! Am I right?

*The Steam Team agree.*

Thomas: Come on, everyone!

Steam Team: *singing* We're on a trip to a place far away.

We're on a railferry, leaving today.

But as we speak we should probably mention

we're the really useful steaming engines.

We'll cross the sea, to our own destination.

we'll arrive at Dartmouth station.

Useful, splendid and good-hearted,

We're just getting started!

Gordon: *speaking* Now we, steam engines, know how to travel in style. If you take my meaning, for instance.

Steam Team: *singing* We'll pull our trains along the really peaceful countryside

and all the people wave as we pass by.

We'll watch the ships that sail and the people that relax

and all the seagulls that are flying in the sky.

The engines all at Dartmouth, hoping they will get to see

that their tourists limits won't be at a few.

But once we all arrive and help them out, they'll all say

"We're a really useful crew!"

So, Let's hold on tight, we're all going for a riding.

There's no need to go into hiding.

There will be smiles and a not alot of frowns

whilst we're all bobbing up and down.

We're all going to a place called Dartmouth

staying in their engine house.

They might think we're crazy, but we've only just departed.

We're just getting started!

Thomas: *speaking* So, engines. What do we say? That...

Steam Team: *singing* We're just getting STARTED! Hooray!

*The Steam Team all chuckle and gossip cheerfully about their expedition.*

Narrator: Thanks to Thomas, The engines were all looking forward to visiting Dartmouth. The fine, sunny weather out at sea was making things enjoyable for the engines. But when night fell, trouble started rising...

*Scene changes to the railferry at night, where the engines are still satisfied about their trip.*

Thomas: I can tell this is going to be a great trip!

James: I can't wait to show off my shiny red coat to all the other engines at Dartmouth.

Gordon: I've done some checking around. There's loads of high viaducts on the Dartmouth line. I can finally have a perfect view of the sea.

*The other engines agree.*

Jade: Ummm... guys. I haven't really stated anything since we left. But... do you remember what the weather was going to be like tonight?

Thomas: I don't know, Jade. What's it going to be like?

Jade: I heard from Salty saying there's going to be a HUGE storm.

Edward: Oh, don't worry, Jade. A huge storm like that won't affect us.

Gordon: *looks at his tablet.* Ummm... Edward? Jade's right, you know. Tonight will see LOADS of thundery clouds.

*Suddenly, the sky goes from starry clear to cloudy and black.*

Chloe: Oh dear, that doesn't sound good.

*Now, drops of rain start landing on the railferry.*

Henry: Oh no... I've just been repainted!

Thomas: Brace yourselves, guys! We're going for a rough ride!!

*Just then, the thunder crashes and the lightning flashes. The railferry starts rocking wildly over the ocean waves. The engines all bounce about like balls in a bucket.*

Edward: Oh dear... we're done for!

Holly: I didn't expect the sea to be this rough.

Percy: Thomas, DO SOMETHING!!!

*Thomas grabs two ropes at the end of the railferry and attempts to steer the boat, clear of the waves.*

Thomas: Salty always said there might be vicious gods of the sea that might attack!

Chloe: I heard tales saying they would slaughter victims who crossed their paths!

Bertha: Well from what I know. WE'RE NOT ONE OF THEM!

James: Couldn't agree more myself, Bertha!

Edward: Hold tight, everyone! This is going to be a very bumpy ride!

*Thomas steers as hard as he could to try and stop the railferry from hitting the waves hard. Meanwhile the engines all rock about trying to keep their balance.*

Thomas: We'll be out in the clear before we know it, guys! I gurantee you. Hold onto your personal belongings and STAY PUT!

Percy: Thomas, LOOK!

*Just then, an enormous tidal wave comes hurdling towards the railferry. Thomas looks up in horror and so do the other engines. The tidal wave comes nearer and nearer and when it comes close, the screen turns to pitch black.*

*End of Scene 1*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 2:

*Whilst Thomas is unconcious, some voices start floating around his smokebox.*

Voice 1: Is he...? Is he... dead?

Voice 2: I wouldn't judge it, he's just a machine. He probably wouldn't have a heart.

Voice 3: Hang on, he's waking up.

*Thomas eventually regains consciousness and wakes up.*

Thomas: *groans* My head... what happened...?

*Suddenly, a brown cat in 17th century clothing pops up in front of Thomas.*

Cat: Hey, sweetheart. Are you okay?

*Thomas freaks out and nearly jumps out of his skin.*

Cat: Oh, sorry. Did we scare you?

Thomas: What's happening? Where am I? What is this?

*Just then, a bat, also dressed in 17th century clothing, walks over to Thomas.*

Bat: You'll speak when you're spoken to.

*Just then, a hound, who's also dressed in 17th century clothing, walks over to the bat and Thomas.*

Hound: Alright, Morgana. Let him be, he's obviously traumatized over something.

Thomas: Look, I appreciate the help right now but WHERE THE HELL AM I? WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FRIENDS?

Cat: Why, we just rescued you. We saw the remains of your ferry drifting out at sea. You and your friends were floating on its pieces, unconscious.

We did rescue all of you but as we did, we noticed your number one so we thought you must be their leader.

Thomas: *immediately calms down and stops quivering.* Well, yes. I am the engines' leader.

Cat: Well, it's nice to meet you. My name's Mila. *shakes Thomas' hand.* What's yours?

Thomas: I'm Thomas. Thomas T. Tank Engine.

Mila: That's a nice name. Where are you from?

Thomas: I'm from the Island of Sodor.

Mila: Interesting. I don't think I've ever heard of this "Island of Sodor" place, must be some kind of magic.

Hound: Well, Thomas. My name's Darious, I'm known to be captain of the Dread Pirates.

Thomas: Wait... you're... p-p-p-p-pirates?! The swashbuckling sailors of the seven seas that have known to kidnap beings and use them as their slaves?!

Darious: *laughs* No, we're not entirely PIRATE pirates, we're more "treasure hunters".

Thomas: Oh, thank goodness for that... I didn't want you guys raiding on my personal belongings.

Darious: *chuckles* Now why would do that?

Thomas: Because... I'm not an antique, I still work on a rail network.

Darious: Okay, fair enough. *points to the bat.* And this here is Morgana, she's the first mate of us pirates.

Morgana: And don't mess with me, steamboy. Or I'll make ya walk the plank.

Thomas: *clears throat*. You wouldn't try and make me WALK the plank. I'd break it, because depending on the type of wood you use for your plank, I am quite heavy, you know.

Morgana: *stunned* Okay, not gonna lie. You actually got me there.

Thomas: Thanks, but right now. I need to know if my friends are alright.

Morgana: Oh yeah, they're down in the bottom alley. Mila, take the blue guy there.

Mila: Ay-ay, Morgana. Follow me, Thomas.

*Mila leads Thomas towards the bottom alley to see the other engines.*

Mila: So, what were you doing out at sea before you lost consciousness?

Thomas: Well, me and the other engines had planned to help out on a railway in Dartmouth, but unfortunately, a storm struck our railferry and... I guess that's how we ended up here.

Mila: I see. Happened with me too, I've only just started here two days ago.

Thomas: You and me both, Mila.

*Thomas and Mila both arrive at a door.*

Mila: Well, this is it, Thomas. This is where your friends are.

Thomas: Well, let's hope they're all still there...

*Mila opens the door and Thomas enters the room. Inside, all the Steam Team members are resting, unconscious from the storm.*

Mila: So, are they alright?

Thomas: *steams over to Percy.* Well, they're still breathing.

*Percy wakes up to find Thomas next to him.*

Percy: Oh, Thomas... what happened...? My head feels like a splitting sore bum.

Thomas: I'll explain everything once the others get up.

*The other engines regain consciousness and wake up.*

James: Are we... are we dead?

Thomas: No, James. You and the rest are still alive and so am I.

Percy: *groans and rubs his smokebox.* Thomas... where the hell are we?

Thomas: I'll tell where we're not, Percy. Dartmouth.

*Percy gasps in horrors and gulps.*

Percy: So you're telling me... we're lost and no-one will ever find us?

Thomas: No, Percy. We were rescued... by pirates.

Percy: PIRATES?!

*The engines suddenly stop feeling achy and look at Thomas in shock.*

Gordon: Wait... did you say... PIRATES?!

*The other engines start muttering in shock.*

Thomas: I know, guys! I know. We're all VERY shocked to be castaway by pirates. But they're not TRUELY pirates. They're really treasure hunters.

Percy: *sighs with relief.* That's a relief. We don't know any treasure lurking about on these parts of the world.

Thomas: Neither do I... Or perhaps I do... I don't know.

Mila: Hey, Thomas. Now that your friends are awake. Why not take them to the ship's deck? They could do with some fresh air. *walks off to the deck.*

Percy: Who was that?

Thomas: I'll explain later, Percy. But come on, guys. Get your boilers steamed up, you probably need some fresh air.

*Thomas steams out of the room, towards the deck and the engines follow.*

*End of Scene 2*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 3:

*Thomas and the other engines steam onto the deck. Mila and the Dread Pirates are waiting for them.*

Darious: Ah, Thomas. Glad you can make it. I see your little friends have regained their consciousness.

Thomas: Oh they have, Darious. Even they're still quite stunned about where they are.

James: Now I can definitely see we're not even in Dartmouth or Sodor. We're fractically in the middle of NOWHERE!

*And sure enough, James is right. For the ship is actually still out at sea.*

Gordon: James is right. If where not in Dartmouth than WHERE are we?

Mila: Oh that shouldn't matter. What we like to know is what are your names?

Thomas: Well, it's quite a big number of engines considering there's 21 of us. But I'll introduce them all. So here we go!

*Thomas steams past each member of the Steam Team and introduces them.*

Thomas: This is Percy and James, They're my homies. Gordon and Emily, the big-assed mainline engines. Edward and Henry, the favourites of the fans.

Nia and Rosie, they're foreign engines from America and Africa. Rebecca and Molly, both strong, yellow, tender engines. Donald and Douglas, twins from Scotland. Duck and Oliver, Great Westerners,

Toby and Jade, branch line engines. Abigail and Bertha, smart-asses of the fleet and Chloe and Holly, industrial steam engines. And I, Thomas T. Tank Engine, am the proud leader of the

fleet we call the Steam Team.

Percy: Established 2002.

James: And how!

*The Dread Pirates look stunned but impressed.*

Mila: Wow, you must have a really good group going there, Thomas.

Thomas: Thanks, Mila.

Percy: Wait... so her name's Mila?

Thomas: Yeah, Mila.

James: Okay, seems fair. So... er... who are the other guys, Thomas?

Thomas: Oh, those? This is Darious. Hound captain of the Dread Pirates and Morgana, first mate of the Dread Pirates.

Mila: I wouldn't mess with her if I were you, guys. She WILL make you suffer.

Morgana: So, Mila's letting you stay on board, huh?

James: Yeah...? And...?

Morgana: Well, let's get one thing straight, No. 5. We Dread Pirates respect the chain of command. As No. 1 said, I'm the first mate and that means, unless the captain says otherwise, you'll follow my orders.

James: Does that apply to me or the other engines?

Morgana: *sighs* The other engines have to follow my orders too. Darious and Mila have soft hearts, but you'll get no mercy from me. Step out of line and I'll kill you myself or even make you walk the plank.

James: Don't MIND if I do!

*James steams over towards the plank but Thomas grabs him by the tender.*

Thomas: Now HOLD ON A MINUTE, James. You can't already commit your suicide whilst we're here. We've only just gotten on this ship. Like I said, we're only getting started.

*singing* We're on a trip to a place far away...

*Gordon interrupts the song.*

Gordon: Right, stop that! Stop the music! We're NOT singing what we've just sung, Thomas.

Thomas: Sorry...

Gordon: *groans* Well, we might just go and find SOMETHING useful to do whilst we're here. *steams over to a barrel and looks inside.* On second thought, maybe being on a pirate ship isn't as bad as I think. *pulls out a beer bottle.*

They've got booze there!

Darious: Erm... Gordon. I don't mean to...

*But Gordon has already drunken one beer bottle.*

Gordon: *sighs* Don't mention it, Darious. I think I'll give you Dread Pirates a chance.

Emily: So... what kind of treasure are you hunting for?

Darious: Treasure? Oh, we're more of the coin-seekers, Emily. Sacred coins that lurk beneath the ocean floors.

Thomas: Sacred coins? But aren't pennies sacred?

Mila: No, Thomas. I think he means magic coins. I'm wearing this heirloom right here. It has a message on the back.

Thomas: Really, what does it say?

*Mila shows Thomas the back of her coin.*

Thomas: It says... "Become what you seek".

Mila: I don't suppose you have a magic coin too, Thomas?

Thomas: Ummm... no. I don't. But I do have a builder's plate.

Mila: Really, where?

Thomas: In my cab.

Mila: Oh, okay.

*Mila climbs up on Thomas' footplate to have a closer look at his builder's plate.*

Thomas: Do you see it yet?

Mila: I do. It says... "Brighton Locomotive Works No. 110 of 1915." So that's what you were when you built, right?

Thomas: The very same.

Percy: YO! LAND-HO! I see a harbour town in the distance.

Thomas: This better be Dartmouth.

Mila: I don't think it is.

Morgana: Well, whatever it is. Set course for that seaside town.

*Chloe arms the ship's wheel.*

Chloe: Ay-ay, cap'n... I mean, first mate.

*Chloe steers the ship towards the harbour town.*

Thomas: But do you know WHICH town is this?

Mila: I don't know. But I suggest you speak to Leeko.

Thomas: Leeko? Who's Leeko?

Mila: C'mon, I'll take you down to him. You should really meet him, He's the third member of our crew. He's our cartographer and I'm sure the three of us will get along perfectly.

Thomas: Okay.

*End of Scene 3*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 4:

*Mila takes Thomas to another part of the ship where Leeko, the cartographer is working. Like the other Dread Pirates, Leeko is also dressed in 17th century clothing except he's actually a corgi.*

Mila: Hi, Leeko!

Leeko: Ah... Hello, Mila. *turns to Thomas.* And you must be Thomas. Nice to meet you. *shakes Thomas' hand.* I'm Leeko, they told you I was a cartographer, right?

Thomas: Ummm... Yes, they did...

Leeko: Oh, of course. Typical pirates... *chuckles* I was actually a merchant much like you and Mila before I brought aboard this ship.

Thomas: Ummm... I'm actually NOT a merchant. I'm a stowaway, and so are the other engines. Mila just happened to alert the other pirates and they rescued me.

Leeko: Ah, I see. But to tell the truth... *chuckles nervously.* I'm not good at much except reading a map. So they say I'm a cartographer, like it's some sort of fancy title... So, I'm assuming Darious told you what we're all about, right?

Thomas: Exactly...

Leeko: So what do you think about all this? The treasure, and everything. That's why you're here, right?

Thomas: Yep. You'd think it's clearly impossible for an engine like myself to be a literal pirate. But like I always say "Little engines can do big things." But to tell the truth. Darious and Mila DID save our lives so... I do owe them my support.

Mila: He's right, you know. I've only been here two days and I'm still learning my way around. But Thomas is actually a nice looking engine when you take a quick glance at him.

Leeko: I see. Well, we're not a charity vessel. Darious may want us to pretend we're not real pirates but let's be honest, he does in a way.

Thomas: *chuckles* I can't argue with that, Leeko.

Leeko: We're all out here on our own, hunting for something rare and dangerous.

Thomas: What sort of something?

Leeko: Didn't Mila tell you? Searching for coins.

Thomas: Oh... of course. But we engines don't have coins.

Mila: They have builder's plates.

Leeko: They do?

Thomas: Well, what do you expect? We are machines, after all.

Leeko: Ah yes. Aside from Darious calling our little "treasure hunt" a noble mission. What's the difference between us and pirates, right?

Thomas: *laughs* I can deeply relate to that, Leeko. Maybe you're right. Us engines will have to see for ourselves.

Leeko: You... doubt me...? Oh, it's fine. I doubt myself too. I don't trust anyone, they have their agendas and their secrets and I'm guessing you're not an exception.

Thomas: No, I'm not...

Leeko: Oh... right. Anyway, Thomas. I've never really seen your kind around before. Where are you from?

Mila: Thomas claims he's from this place called "The Island of Sodor."

Leeko: Hmmmm... Don't think I've ever heard of this "Island of Sodor" place before.

Thomas: Oh, it's situated on the north west coast of England, right between Barrow-in-Furness and the Isle of Man. You can't miss it.

Leeko: Interesting. Anyway, we've rambled long enough. We should talk treasure-hunting.

Thomas: Sure, can you guys tell me a bit more about this "treasure"? Why exactly does Darious thinks it's so... valuable?

Mila: Darious didn't tell you yet?

Thomas: No, I've only found out.

Leeko: Oh, typical Darious. Well thankfully, Thomas. You didn't miss much. It's mainly just a load of superstitious mumbo-jumbo if you ask me. I say it's valuable because it's gold. But we'll just leave it at that.

Thomas: Ummm... okay... Anyway, do you have some kind of map that would lead us to the treasure?

Leeko: Hey... remember, Thomas. I'm the cartographer. If I had a treasure map, do you think I'd get such little respect around here? All I know is that there's this cave near the Cursed Coast.

But there's NO idea how to get there or what's actually inside.

Thomas: Cursed Coast? Where's that?

Mila: We don't know, Thomas. We haven't studied its whereabouts yet.

Thomas: Either way, it does sound dangerous. Especially for a little engine like me. And like I said, I'm a stowaway and I'm not sure about what help I can be hunting for treasure in a place with a name like that...

Leeko: Hey, don't look at me, before I was rescued. I was an antiques dealer, join the club...

Thomas: First of all, there IS no club here. And secondly, where was this antiques shop of yours? That kinda sounds like my cup of tea.

Mila: Okay, enough gossiping, you two. Leeko, how dangerous IS the cave, exactly?

Leeko: Ah, it's a total pleasure cruise.

Thomas: *scoffs* Pleasure cruise, indeed. More like a death trap, am I right?

Leeko: Well, Thomas. What'd you think? We've got to get the coordinates exactly right before we set sail. That's why we've focused on what Darious calls "reconnaissance".

Thomas: What KIND of reconnaissance?

Mila: Oh, you'll find out soon enough, Thomas.

*Just then, James steams in.*

James: Oi, Thomas. The cap'n needs you. We've arrived at this place called "Watchet".

Thomas: Watchet? Oh, that's in Somerset, right.

James: Yep, Darious needs you out to help Chloe guide the ship into port.

Thomas: On my way, James.

*Thomas steams out onto the ship's deck, Mila and Leeko follow him. Thomas steams onto the ship's deck, followed by Mila and Leeko. Chloe is still at the ship's wheel with Darious beside him.*

Darious: Ah, Thomas! Just the engine I was looking for. I see Leeko's taken a liking to you.

Thomas: Oh he has, Darious.

Darious: Excellent! Chloe, take us into port.

Chloe: Ay-ay, cap'n, Moving into port!

*Chloe steers the ship into the port near Watchet, The ship moves scratches and tears up through the rocky parts of the sea.*

Thomas: Keep going. You're good. You're good. You're good... and... stop. Don't worry, Cap'n, we'll buff out those scratches.

Darious: Yeah... I suppose we could...

*Scene changes to Thomas, the Dread Pirates and the Steam Team entering a tavern.*

Thomas: Ummmm... Darious. Are you SURE this is the right place?

Darious: I gurantee you, Thomas. The Hook and Sword is the best pub that us Dread Pirates have ever been to.

Gordon: Are you sure? I've been to a much BETTER pub than that.

Edward: Oh please, Gordon. Don't you start about Joe's...

Gordon: I WASN'T GONNA SAY THAT! God... why does everyone think I'm talking about Joe's?

Mila: Anywho, I'm quite confident that somebody here might know the location of the treasure. But we can't be too cavalier about ascertaining its whereabouts.

Percy: You're the one to talk...

Darious: The last thing we want is another crew learning about this and creating competition, is that clear?

Thomas: Erm... I don't see any other pirates around here. But I understand what you mean.

Darious: Excellent, Now then all of you. Just try and act naturally and see what you can find.

Thomas: Yeah, what Darious said. And as for you, Gordon, Henry, Toby and Duck. I DON'T want you getting drunk on the booze and vomiting in each other's throats like you usually do.

Toby: Now WHY would we do that, Thomas? Me and the boys have been staying sober since this whole pirate stowaway-thingy began.

Duck: Toby's right. In fact, I heard the West Somerset line goes through Watchet. I even asked one of the engines for directions to Dartmouth.

*Scene cuts to cutaway of Duck arriving at Watchet Station on the West Somerset Railway, where he stops in front of GWR 7800 Manor Class No. 7828 "Odney Manor".*

Duck: Excuse me, Odney Manor, is it? Do you know how to get to Dartmouth?

Odney Manor: Yeah, it's back the way you came. *pulls out gun.*

*Scene cuts back to the tavern where Thomas and Mila are sitting at a table with glasses of cola. Leeko walks over to them.*

Leeko: Hey, you two. How are you enjoying your first aimless tavern crawl... Sorry, I meant "highly productive reconnaisance mission"?

Thomas: Hey, maybe we'll get lucky, Leeko.

Mila: I agree with Thomas, You never know what you'll overhear in a place like this.

Leeko: You say that now. So... how many taverns has it been? Thirteen, now?

Thomas: I don't know... This is my first one.... outside of Sodor, I mean.

Mila: And you still haven't found any clues?

Leeko: Nope, not a one. The best you can say about is this. I suppose it's better than battles on the high seas, right?

Thomas: Eh, it's the other way round for me.

Mila: You can say that again, Leeko. We should consider ourselves lucky if we can get what we want without having to fight, right?

Leeko: You sound just like Darious you know, Mila.

Thomas: Erm... Mila? I'd take that back if I were you.

Mila: What do you mean, Thomas?

Thomas: Think about it. There could be some mystical sea monsters that live on the ocean floorboards, waiting to suck in their prey.

Mila: *chuckles* Now WHY would we think there'd be sea monsters?

Thomas: Well, you are a pirate and you do go out to sea 24/7.

Mila: So?

Thomas: And... that's it. Sea monsters... scary things.... Rawr... eat you up... that sort of stuff.

Leeko: Oh that's just silly mumbo-jumbo, Thomas. We would NEVER find a monster on our travels.

Thomas: You never know, Leeko. You might...

Leeko: *chuckles* Anyways, I won't be much help to you or the rest of the crew. You should just go talk to someone else.

*Leeko walks off to join someone else's conversation.*

Thomas: Hey, you're still pretty much help to me!

Mila: Don't worry about him, Thomas. He'll get round to us, one way or another.

Thomas: I suppose. Anyways, I wonder what the other engines are up to?

*Thomas and Mila leave their table, taking their drinks with them. They find Percy and Chloe, gambling with Morgana and Rahiros, a red rhinoceros.*

Morgana: Are you gonna bet or are you just gonna sit there?

Percy: Patience please, Morgana... Big guy is just taking his time.

Rahiros: Um...

Morgana: In or out... which is it?

Chloe: This is gonna take a while.

Rahiros: Alright, I'm in for... 100.

Morgana: Your poker face is pathetic. I'm calling...

Chloe: Yeah, I'm out.

Percy: I'm folding.

Rahiros: Four-of-a-kind, how's that poker face now?

*Morgana slyly reaches into her boot.*

Morgana: Four-of-a-kind for me. Guess I got lucky again...

Rahiros: What? You're kidding, again?

Chloe: No s**t, Sherlock.

Rahiros: Nobody's got luck that good. *calls over to Thomas and Mila.* Hey, you two - you saw her. She's cheating, right?

Thomas: *chuckles* She might have a four-of-a-kind, but Percy here has a royal flush.

*And sure enough, Thomas is right. Percy puts down his cards, revealing a royal flush of clubs.*

Percy: *smirks* How'd you like them, apples?

*Chloe, Rahiros and Morgana all groan and grumble in dismay.*

Mila: And another thing, Morgana WAS cheating. I saw her take something from her boot. *whispers to Morgana.* Sorry, Morgana.

Rahiros: AHA! I knew it! You're a card shark. Give me back my gold.

Morgana: *blushes because she got a bit carried away.* Ah... yeah... No. 6 already won it.

Percy: Yep, and you'll have to pry it from my cold, scrap, body.

Rahiros: You better pay up now or...

Percy: Or else what? Call for a constable, my hands are clean, you know. I used my emergancy hand gel earlier today.

Rahiros: This isn't over! I will get my gold back, you mark my words! *storms off to the bar to buy a beer.*

Morgana: What the hell is wrong with you, guys? Don't you recognise a hustle when you see one, sweetheart?

Thomas: You think so, but no.

Morgana: You're a liability, No. 1. I bet you haven't found anything out either, have you?

Thomas: Well, no. Because there aren't much people here, aside from you Dread Pirates and us Steam Team engines.

*Just then, Darious and Edward walk over.*

Darious: Well, my efforts have proved fruitless... not even a whisper about the cave.

Edward's tried using this "Google Maps" thing to locate the whereabouts of the cave too.

Edward: I did my best, but there's no sign. But I'm still thankful that this place has free Wi-Fi and all.

Morgana: That makes three of us.

Chloe: *clears throat* SEVEN of us.

Morgana: Ah, yes. SEVEN of us, thanks No. 40. How much more of our time are we going to waste here?

Thomas: Beats me, It'll take even longer when the boys are drunk.

Darious: Anyway, I just discovered a small dining terrace out back. It shouldn't take long for you lot and I to comb through it, and then we'll head out.

Morgana: Fine, let's get this over with.

Thomas: Hold up, let me buy a Diet Coke to go. I really need some energising to get the old pistons pumping.

*Thomas steams over to the bar.*

Mila: I'd better go with him too... Just because... *Mila immediately follows Thomas to the bar.*

*Thomas and Mila arrive at the bar where they take their seats. James and Donald are already there, chatting. Thomas is about to dig into his wallet for a pound note but Mila stops him.*

Mila: Please, Thomas. Allow me.

*Mila digs out a £10 note from her purse and places it on the counter.*

Mila: Abbigail, two Diet Cokes please.

*Abbigail, a goldish brown vixen, serves Thomas and Mila two glass bottles of Diet Cokes.*

Abbigail: Here you are. Hey, I couldn't help but overhear what you and some of your friends have been asking about. I don't want you or anyone else looking for that treasure, you hear?

Thomas: Aw, why not? Is it because I'm adopted? I HAVE a mother you know.

Abbigail: Don't play dumb with me, I know you heard the rumours.

James: And SO HAVE WE! Those Dread Pirates are finding that treasure and WE'RE helping them. Even if it involves getting brutally annihilated or not.

Abbigail: Yes, but the Cursed Coast. It's the most dangerous outline on the planet. The underwater reefs make sailing around a willy-nilly suicide mission.

Thomas: Suicide mission, indeed. *scoffs* I've been on suicide missions before but I'm still standing... *looks up.* Oh... no... they're not gonna play Elton John? Well, what am I gonna sing? This is a musical after all, Electric Light Orchestra? Nah, we'll save that for later...

Where was I? Ah, yes? You seem like a nice gal, Abbigail. Maybe you should join us and help us seek that treasure.

Mila: Thomas is right, we could land safely if we had the exact coordinates...

James: I'd just use Google Maps, that's fast and reliable.

Thomas: Didn't work, James. Darious and Edward told us.

Abbigail: You don't even know half of it. Even if you could land, what about the beast guarding the treasure?

James: *spits out cola he was drinking.* THERE'S A BEAST?!

Abbigail: A bloodthirsty monster, No. 5. Are you really so stupid that...?

*Suddenly, a creaking door sounds and a pair of heavy, swashbuckling boots can be heard.

Abbigail: Oh no, it's him!

Thomas: What? Who's him?

Mila: Him who?

Abbigail: Just get down and stay quiet.

Thomas: But we only still haven't...

*But before Thomas could finish answering. Mary and Brock enter the tavern, following behind a fearsome pirate named Rourkie.*

Mila: Rourkie...

Rourkie: Abby, Abby, Abby... and Mila. Why so glum? You know how I feel about long faces.

Abbigail: Rourkie, why are you here? I already paid up for this month.

Rourkie: Oh, I know. Dealing with pirates just keeps getting more and more dangerous, doesn't it? So we're going to start needing the protection money TWICE a month.

Abbigail: Fine, Take this and leave.

Rourkie: My, my, my... I had NO idea how much you were struggling.

Mila: What do you mean?

Rourkie: This is all you girls could spare? Either this place is struggling... or you're holding out onto us. Now if it was me... I think I'd give every penny I had to know I could sleep

safely and soundly in my bed. I trust you get what I'm saying, Abby?

Mila: You expect Abbigail to turn over everything she has?

Rourkie: Mind the long face, Mila. I'm not a monster, I'm willing to compromise. If you don't have the coin right now, I'm open to accepting other forms of payment.

Abbigail: You don't mean...

*But before Abbigail could reply, Thomas steams over.*

Thomas: Step aside, Abbigail. Let a really useful engine deal with guys like this. *steams over to Rourkie.* So, Mr. Nice Guy, you're looking to nick someone's mon-ay and feel good about it?

Rourkie: What... the hell... is that...?

Brock: That's a steam locomotive, cap'n.

Rourkie: I KNOW WHAT IT IS, BROCK! But... why does it have a face...? ...and talks...? Who are you?

Thomas: The name's Tank Engine, THOMAS the Tank Engine. My homies, the Steam Team and I have been travelling the world, kicking people's asses and screwing their brains out. I expect you want us to do the same for you?

Rourkie: No... But anyway, I've got a compromise to do. Abbigail, your son is up in the attic? How old is he? 12? I was younger than that when I scrubbed my first deck.

Thomas: Really? I was younger than that when I first shunted my coaches.

Abbigail: No, not my son!

James: What is your son even doing in the attic in the first place?

Abbigail: Hiding, from the likes of THESE guys. *points to Rourkie and his crew.*

Rourkie: Au Contraire, Abbigail. Mary, why don't you bring him down?

Mary: Of course, cap'n. I'd only be too happy to...

*Mary walks over to the attic, but as she does so. She accidentally walks into Donald, making him spill his cola in the process.*

Donald: Ya cost me a fiver, ya muckel piece of s**t.

Mary: *blushes embarrassingly* Ah... yeah... right...

Abbigail: WAIT! Here, that's everything. Just don't touch my son!

Rourkie: Oh, Abby, thank you. I appreciate it. I'm sure your son will, too. Mary, you haven't gone deaf, have you?

Mary: No, I haven't, cap'n. Some other locomotive with a face spilt his drink all over me.

Donald: OH, FOR LOSH SAKES! She was the one getting in my way. The wee layabout doesn't take care of her surroundings.

Rourkie: Alright, alright. I told you to go up to the attic and bring down the boy, didn't I? So why are you still here?

Mary: But my clothes are wet with cola.

Abbigail: And... you said...

Rourkie: It'll be good for him, Abby. What kind of man will he turn out to be if he's raised by a woman with no spine? Mary, go fetch him and DON'T make me ask again.

Mary: Right away, boss... I mean... cap'n.

Donald: I don't think you'll be going ANYWHERE unless you pay for mah cola. I haven't even drunk it yet.

Mary: Well, compensate me, Mr. Clumsy. You shouldn't have got in my way. Now if you excuse me, I've got some kidnapping to do.

*Mary walks away, but just as she does so. She ends up bumping into Douglas and spills HIS cola in the process.*

Douglas: OH, FOR THE LOVE OF- Watch where you're going, ya b***h.

Donald: Hey, Douggie. Did she spill your drink too?

Douglas: Don't remind me, Donal'. I've seen enough.

Donald: Well, I think the laddie needs to have her brain smashed. Now CHOKE ON IT!

*Donald raises his empty cola glass above Mary's head. But as he swings it, Mary dodges and the glass hits Douglas on his forehead.*

Douglas: OCH! Crikey, laddie. You gave me a smash on the noggin for the umpteenth time.

Donald: You should've dodged my attack, you absolute w****r!

Douglas: Why YOU-

*Douglas gets out a baton from his running board and begins hitting Donald with it.*

Abbigail: Not in MY pub, you don't. *gets a kettle of boiling water and sprays it in both the Scottish Twins' eyes.*

Donald: AAAUGH, Me eyes!

Douglas: Ach, I'm scalding, I am!

Abbigail: PLEASE don't take my son. Have mercy! *follows Mary to the attic.*

*Mila, Rourkie, Brock, James and Thomas all watch the whole thing, stunned. Mila turns to Thomas.*

Mila: Are they... usually like that?

Thomas: Ah, that's Scottish Twin stereotypes for you. Happens 24/7 on Sodor.

*Just then, Gordon, Edward, Darious and Morgana return from tavern-hunting.*

Gordon: Don't worry, guys. I'm sure we'll have better luck at the next tavern.

Morgana: Darious says that every time, No. 4.

Edward: And I don't think we will. LOOK!

Morgana: Wait... is that...? ROURKIE!!!

*Morgana lifts up a chair and hits Brock over the face with it.*

Morgana: I was HOPING the next time I saw your ugly face, it would be at the end of a hangman's noose. But to see you, of all people, TAKING A KID?!

Rourkie: Morgy, Morgy, Morgy... so good to see you again after all these years.

Morgana: You don't get to call me that anymore. You die, NOW!!!

*But before Morgana could attack, Thomas steams into action.*

Thomas: Don't worry, I've got this!

*Thomas steams past Morgana and pushes Rourkie over. Rourkie is now lying underneath Thomas' front bufferbeam.*

Rourkie: Ouch... Silly me, I thought you steam-boys cared about that boy in the attic... You really think he'll be fine if you harm me?

Darious: Thomas, don't be too rash.

Morgana: Cap'n, you don't understand, he's... he's...

Thomas: He's asking for it but NOT ON MY WATCH!

Darious: You're right, Thomas. Return anything you've stolen, Rourkie. Tell your subordinate to come back down, without the boy and without a weapon.

Rourkie: Or else what? You and your little gang of merry misfits will tear me limb from limb?

Thomas: They wouldn't, but I WOULD.

Rourkie: You just try, steam-boy.

Thomas: Okay...

*Thomas grabs Rourkie's left arm and pulls.*

Rourkie: What the... ow.. Owww.. OWWWW! OKAY, OKAY! It was figure of speech, just don't pull my limbs apart. PLEASE!! Ow...

Thomas: Alright. But YOU THINK you can just TAKE A F**KING KID and walk away?

Rourkie: I haven't told anyone this but I've grown so soft, haven't I? The old me would have simply burned this place to the ground if someone was holding out on me, like you are now. We've got an interesting crowd here...

Tell me, Thomas. What do you think their roasting flesh would smell like?

Thomas: Sunshine and farts, that what I think.

Morgana: No. 1... just let me do it!

Darious: She won't listen to me forever, time is not on your side, little man.

Rourkie: You... insolent... little s**t. I guess I have to pay for my sins, don't I? Here you go, Abby. Don't spend it all in one place.

*Rourkie gives Thomas back the stolen money, who passes it over to Abbigail.*

Darious: Now LEAVE and take your goons with you. Leave the boy unharmed.

Rourkie: How convenient for Abby that YOU LOT happened to show up. I'd heard rumors that she had some kind of valuable information.

Thomas: What information?

Rourkie: Doesn't count for the likes of you, steam-boy. I dismissed them out of hand, of course. How could someone like her know anything? But Darious, seeing you here... It's always taken something more

valuable than money to interest you, hasn't it? Maybe, just maybe... there IS something special here after all.

Thomas: Alright, that's it. Now I'm gonna...

Morgana: No. 1! Let me do this...

Rourkie: Don't worry, steam-boy. You won't have to rein her in. I'll leave quietly... As soon you get off me first. Your wheels are crushing my legs.

Thomas: Oh, sorry...

*Thomas reverses so Rourkie could stand up.*

Rourkie: Mary, Brock... has your deafness returned? We're leaving.

*Mary and Brock arrive on the scene.*

Brock: Ugh... whatever you say, boss... I mean, cap'n...

Rourkie: Morgy... we'll see each other again soon.

*Rourkie, Brock and Mary leave the tavern. Thomas, Mila, Morgana, Darious, Leeko, Abbigail, James, Gordon, Edward, Donald and Douglas stand there, stunned. Eventually, Percy and Toby arrive on the scene.*

Percy: Awww... don't tell me I missed the big bar fight.

Toby: Hey, you were the one taking me on the scavanger hunt to find some toilet paper.

Percy: Public toilets are a nuisence, Toby. I can't do business unless they have a stall with toilet paper, and LOTS of it.

Abbigail: Anyways, words cannot begin to express my gratitude.

Thomas: Then DON'T express it with words next time. Just give us the map to the treasure and everything will alright.

Abbigail: I... can't.

Thomas: Oh... fine. Can we have the map to the treasure... PLEASE?

Abbigail: Umm... sorry... but no.

Mila: And why the hell not?

Abbigail: Because I don't want anything to happen to you. Between the coast and the monster, you've got no chance. When I went, everyone but me died... including my husband. Especially after your display today, I can't give it to you.

Percy: Wait... you were a sailor on the S.S Gourmet?

Abbigail: No, I worked on the S.S Diarrhea before I came here.

Percy: That figures...

Edward: Your number one priority shouldn't be our safety, Abby. It should be your son's.

Gordon: Edward's right. Rourkie isn't a man who takes humilation lightly. You two need to leave town immediately.

Percy: Leave town? Are you dead serious?

Abbigail: I never thought it would come to this. You think if we leave town. We'll be safe?

Thomas: Nope, not even then...

Darious: Thomas is right, Rourkie knows there's some kind of valuable knowledge connected to this tavern. He'll go looking for you, eventually.

Edward: And as what we've witnessed. Giving him what he wants won't be enough to sate him.

Abbigail: But isn't there anything we can do?

Thomas: Until that treasure is found by someone, he'll consider you his best lead. So the only way to make sure you're safe is to give us that map, and everything will be alright. The Steam Team and the Dread Pirates will find that treasure

and make it known far and wide.

Abbigail: But if Rourkie knows you have it, won't you be in danger too, Thomas?

Thomas: Don't be silly, Abbigail. We're really useful engines and NOTHING can stand in our way! Right, guys?

*The other engines and the Dread Pirates aren't so sure about this. But only Mila is confident.*

Mila: Of course, Thomas.

Abbigail: Alright, take the map. But be careful.

*Abbigail hands Thomas the treasure map, Thomas carefully stores it in his bufferbeam.*

Thomas: Thanks, Abbigail. *hands Abbigail £250 in notes.* Here, you'll need this to fix your tavern up.

Abbigail: *stops worrying and starts feeling more better.* You know, Thomas. I think I could do with a useful engine like you.

*But before Thomas could reply, Percy intervenes.*

Percy: Now HOLD ON A MINUTE, Thomas. You're not expecting ALL 21 of us engines to travel the sea to find some ancient treasure?

Thomas: Don't worry, Percy. These pirates saved our lives and we're repaying them.

Percy: But THOMAS, we were supposed to help the other engines in DARTMOUTH. They would've repayed US if we helped them.

Thomas: Oh... damn... you're right, what was I thinking? I forgot about the Dartmouth engines. The railway would've called The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) by now. He and Joey will know that we're lost.

Darious: Hey, don't worry, Thomas. If we can help you once, we can help you again.

Thomas: You will?

*Mila walks over to Thomas.*

Mila: Thomas, we'll make you a deal. If you and your engine friends help us find that treasure. We'll get you all home to the Island of Sodor.

Thomas: You know, Mila... You got a deal!

Percy: Well, that's good. Just as long as we finish this, we can all go home.

Thomas: Come on, there's no time to wait. Let's go!

*Thomas is just steaming out of the tavern when Mila stops him.*

Mila: Wait... Thomas.

Thomas: What's wrong, Mila? Something the matter?

Mila: Let me see if I've got this right, we're sailing our ship through dangerous waters onto a treacherous coastline.

Thomas: And...?

Mila: To hike into a cave with a deadly monster in it, just to get a treasure which Rourkie might also be hunting?

Thomas: Yes...?

Percy: Well, what'd you expect? A picnic in the countryside? Better bring a hoop dress and some lace gloves. *laughs uneasily.*

*The other engines, except Edward, Abbigail and the Dread Pirates, laugh too. Edward blows his whistle sharply.*

Edward: Alright, alright. That's enough. We're not going anywhere if we all start arguing.

Mila: Edward's right. I'm only a spice merchant and Thomas is only a tank engine. We're not pirates. You expect us to risk our lives when we don't even know the full story of why we're out here?

Thomas: I understand why this might be frightening for you, Mila. But as what you and me have just witnessed. It's not safe to discuss things round here.

*Just then, Oliver arrives at the tavern, covered in blood stains.*

Oliver: Thomas is right. Watchet isn't a safe place at all. I asked that bloody Odney Manor about this Cursed Coast and THIS is the thanks I get?

Thomas: Whoa jeez, Oliver. You better back things up a bit.

Darious: Thomas is right, Oliver. We must be careful. Let's all come back to the ship and I promise, I'll explain everything.

Thomas: If you insist, Darious.

Morgana: Great, get your butts moving then. We don't have a moment to waste.

Thomas: And about time too. This scene was so bloody long!

*Thomas and the Dread Pirates leave the tavern back to the ship. Abbigail watches them leave.*

Abbigail: Good luck, you lot! If you need it...

*End of Scene 4*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 5:

*Back on the Island of Sodor. It's close to dusk and Joey is at Knapford with The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt).*

Narrator: Meanwhile, on the Island of Sodor. The news about the Steam Team's disappearance suddenly spread.

*Joey has just finished sweeping up platform 1 at Knapford when he hears The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) on his telephone.*

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Wait... they've WHAT?!... Oh dear... I understand... I'm not sure how I should break the news to Joey, the Female Furries or the other engines but... we'll work something out... good night. *hangs up.*

Joey: What's wrong, sir?

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Joey... I'm not sure how to say this but... The Steam Team didn't arrive at Dartmouth.

Joey: Wait... what?

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Yes, Joey. The Steam Team are missing.

Joey: No... they can't be, sir. It'll be Misty Island Rescue all over again. *sniffs*

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): *pats Joey on the shoulder.* Don't worry, Joey. I'm pretty sure we can track down the whereabouts of Thomas and his friends.

Joey: I hope so, sir.

*Just then, The Female Furries walk onto the platform.*

Amy: Evening, sir. Hello, Joey. *notices Joey and The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) looking miserable.* Oh, you two seem upset. What's wrong, sir?

Joey: Oh, Amy. It's terrible. The Steam Team got lost during a trip to Dartmouth.

Amy: Don't worry, Joey. You and The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) gave them GPSs. So they should be alright.

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Actually, Amy. The engines don't have GPSs, they only use Google Maps.

Sandy: ...and Google Maps requires Wi-Fi to be used.

Amy: Oh... that sucks.

Joey: Yes, but aside that, Who am I going to work with until Thomas gets found?

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Don't worry, Joey. I'll find another engine you can work with.

Joey: Thank you, sir.

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Anyways, don't you furries have a train to catch?

Darlene: Well, sir. We WERE going to catch James' early night train. But since he's lost too. Who's going to pull his local?

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Don't worry, Darlene. I've have found another substitute for James.

*Just then, a whistle sounds in the backdrop.*

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): And here he comes now.

*Just then, Neville pulls into the station.*

Neville: Evening, ladies. The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) called me here to look after James' coaches. Hop in.

Amy: *shrugs* Well, it's better than nothing.

*Amy and the Female Furries board Neville's train.*

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Alright, Neville. I know you haven't pulled passengers in a while but please show us what you've got.

Neville: Indeed, sir... and Joey, don't worry about the Steam Team's whereabouts. We're doing our best to look for them.

Joey: Thanks, Neville. Really appreciate it.

*Neville blows his whistle and leaves Knapford with his local train for the Main Line.*

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt): Now then, Joey. I expect you need a lift home.

Joey: I certainly do, sir.

*The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) takes Joey to his car so he can take him home. Scene changes to back on the pirate ship where Thomas, the Steam Team and the Dread Pirates are still out sailing. Thomas, Mila and Darious are sitting outside on the ship's deck.*

Thomas: The sea... it sounds really peaceful at dawn.

Mila: I see slumber proved elusive to you as well, Thomas.

Thomas: Oh, what's the point in sleeping, Mila? Leeko says we'll reach the Cursed Coast by dawn. It's not THAT far off, right?

Darious: Correct indeed, Thomas. So how'd you feel about this. Excited? Trepidatious?

Thomas: I'm... actually not sure how I feel about all this, guys.

Darious: *chuckles* We understand, Thomas. These are confusing times for all of us. As I promised, I'll explain the full story of why we're risking our lives for this treasure. Join me and Mila in my quarters and we'll discuss it.

Thomas: Alright.

*Just as Thomas is about to go down to the captain's quarters with Mila and Darious, Percy and Jade turn up beside them.*

Percy: Thomas... are you clearly sure you want to go through all this?

Thomas: Positive, why?

Jade: We don't know... Thomas. This Cursed Coast place sounds really scary. I'm not sure I want to go there just to find some treasure.

Percy: Me neither.

Mila: Oh, there's nothing to be scared of, Percy. Just as long as we're together in one place, we'll be alright.

Percy: *sighs* Very good, Mila.

*Thomas, Mila and Darious head off down to the captain's quarters. Darious opens the door for Thomas.*

Darious: After you, Thomas.

*Thomas enters the captain's quarters first, and gapes at the wonderous treasure that Darious has.*

Thomas: Cinders and ashes, look at all of this.

Mila: We did say we're treasure hunters, Thomas.

Thomas: *smirks* I knew that.

*Darious, Mila and Thomas sit down near a desk.*

Darious: I see you and Mila are admiring the rewards of our exploits.

Thomas: Oh, I certainly am, Darious. But... what is all this? ...and how did you find it?

Darious: Well, though I hunt treasure, I'm not a man driven by greed, Everything you see here is a piece of history, with its own story to tell. Of course, the treasure we're seeking has the grandest story of all.

When I was little, my favourite story was "The Most Wonderful Wizard". Ever heard of it?

Thomas: Ummm... No, I haven't. Where I'm from, there are LOADS of different stories mainly focused around us engines. They either get published in books or adapted to television, as we are right now.

Darious: I suspected as much. The most wonderful wizard was a hound of near-limitless power. Which he sought to use to heal the world. Hunger, Worry, Regret and Misery.

The wizard was sure that, used properly, his magic would banish them all from Earth. He created artifacts to channel his power, the greatest treasure imaginable.

But when he shared the treasure with others... they misused their power and corrupted their purposes. Still, the wizard soldiered on, sacrificing his magic and even his own life to finish this magnum opus.

Which was scattered to the ends of Earth.

Thomas: Bust my buffers, It's hard to imagine THIS being a child's favourite story. What happened next?

Mila: Well, we've come to believe that it isn't a mere story, Thomas. The most wonderful wizard's treasure exists. It is, as you may have suspected, the coins we're seeking. One of which is dangling around my neck.

Thomas: Oh... but what's so special about those coins?

Darious: The truth is, nobody knows anything about the wizard's last treasure for certain. Such as where the coins are, what they do, or why the wizard created them - that wasn't part of the story. That's for us to figure out for ourselves.

Mila: However... we have a hunch or two. How, Thomas, if we may ask, did you acquire that builder's plate in your cab?

Thomas: Um... well... builder's plates, in case you don't know, they're like... birth certificates. Except you have them attached to your body. It's a common thing for machines like myself. What about that coin of yours, Mila? Where'd you get it from?

Mila: I bought it in a shop.

Thomas: Really? *scoffs* As I suspected.

Darious: Well, I can't accept that our meeting was mere coincidence. But after weeks of fruitlessly searching, we'll find the location of the cache of coins. Like the moment when Mila first came on board.

Mila: That's true. Fate is pulling us together and I believe that the treasure wants to be found.

Thomas: Treasures have feelings? But... why?

Darious: Who really knows why the treasure wants what it wants? Perhaps, each coin longs to be with its brethren and...

Thomas: No, no, no, no, no, no. I meant, WHAT would lead you think that a coin could want anything? Like... does it want to be spent or anything?

Mila: Sounds pretty crazy, doesn't it. But let me take just that one step further. Perhaps the treasure wants to be found because it has an agenda for those that find it.

Thomas: Oh...

Mila: And to change them... in their bodies.

Thomas: *gulps* Oh... erm... right... What?

Darious: I know, I know. I can scarcely believe it myself. But life's become very different to me since I found my coin and yours has begun to transform as well, has it not?

Thomas: Nope... don't feel any different, and only because I've just met you guys.

Mila: My life didn't change when I got the coin or when I met Darious and the Dread Pirates. It changed it when we first met you and your friends, Thomas.

Darious: The coins work in strange and mysterious ways, I'm sure, as we gather more, we'll begin to understand more. It's been a long journey just to find two coins. Once we find our cache in the caves...

Thomas: Sorry... will that be where the rest of the coins are?

Mila: No, Thomas. The legend says the treasure was scattered to the ends of Earth.

Darious: Indeed, A large find would be fantastic but we won't find them all in just one place.

Thomas: Oh... I see. But how will we know when we have found them all?

Darious: Well, Thomas. That brings me and Mila to our most radical theory about the coins.

*Just then, Morgana and James burst into the quarters.*

Morgana: Cap'n! Cursed Coastline is sighted. Your friend here seems to have a good view, No. 1.

James: Well, reading those Where's Wally (Where's Waldo) books really paid it off.

Darious: Right, we'll discuss this later, Thomas and Mila.

Thomas: You got it, Darious.

*Thomas and Mila walk out from the captain's quarters to find the ship is almost nearing the Cursed Coast.*

Thomas: Wow, I guess it wasn't so hard to find at all.

*Just then, Leeko walks over to Thomas.*

Leeko: You know, Thomas. Me and Morgana have been thinking. Since you engines are joining us on our little *clears throat* "treasure hunt". We thought you and the other engines might want to look your best for this occasion.

Thomas: Are you sure? Like we just said, we're stowaways, not actually pirates.

Mila: You may not be pirates, but we could make you look like some.

Thomas: How will you do that?

Mila: I'm really good at making clothes for friends, even these clothes I'm wearing, I made them myself.

Thomas: Interesting. But it might be quite difficult considering you'll need LOADS of material for 21 engines.

Mila: No problem. We have PLENTY of material in the lower deck. We can get them and make the materials for you.

Thomas: That could work.

*Scene cuts to SpongeBob-style Time card.*

French Narrator: Later...

*Scene cuts to Mila, putting a tricorn on Thomas' smokebox.*

Mila: There we go! What do you think, Thomas?

*Mila steps down from Thomas, who is covered from funnel to footplate in pirate booty.*

Thomas: I say, Mila. You've done a wonderful job. So which pirate accent should I speak? Should I be an "Arrrr!" pirate or a "Yo-ho-ho!" pirate?

Mila: *laughs* You're alright the way you are, Thomas.

*Thomas looks at the other engines who are also dressed in pirate booty.*

Edward: As much I like the attire for engines, I'm still not sure about this scavenger hunt.

Gordon: It's only just a bunch of treasure, Edward. Nothing to be scared of.

Mila: Gordon's right, Edward. Just see what parts of treasure you can find on this island.

Edward: Oh... Alright, Mila.

*Just then, Toby walks past using two peg legs.*

Toby: Look, I'm Peggy the Pirate Tram Engine. *laughs before falling flat on his face on the deck.*

*Just then, Percy steams past with two separate eye patches covering his eyes.*

Percy: And I'm Blindfart, the Blind Pirate Engine.

*Percy suddenly falls off the side of the ship and into the sea, but manages to get back on board.*

Percy: Funny stuff, these pirate clothes are...

Morgana: *sighs and turns to Chloe.* No. 40! Take us behind those rocks and dock here.

Chloe: Ay-ay, cap'n... I mean... first mate. Moving behind the rocks!

*Chloe steers the ship into the rocks, The ship moves scratches and tears up through the rocky parts of the sea.*

Thomas: Keep going. You're good. You're good. You're good... and... stop.

Darious: Oh drat, and we just got those scratches mended.

Chloe: Hey, don't look at me. I don't even know how to park a ship.

*The Steam Team and the Dread Pirates disembark from the ship.*

Leeko: That was certainly a longer sail than I expected. Wow, look at all these wrecks.

Darious: If we linger here too long. The Pirate's Fate will join them. To call these waters unsafe would be a gross understatement.

Thomas: Oh... so THAT'S the name of your ship... The Pirate's Fate. Pretty dull for a ship's name if you ask me.

Duck: But the real problem is, we have NO idea how deep the caves go, let alone how long it will take to find that treasure.

Percy: ...or if we'll even make it back alive AND in one piece. Should we really be doing this, guys?

Morgana: What Darious meant was someone's got to stay out here in case the tide turns, for the ship's sake.

Darious: I'll do it. It's a captain's duty. You lot go on ahead and I'll meet you at the mouth of this cave. Gordon, Henry, Jade, Duck, Abigail and Rebecca. I want you to look for treasure in that jungle over there.

*Darious points to a jungle on the right side of the cave.*

Gordon: Consider it done, sir.

Henry: As long as the bugs don't bite.

*Gordon, Henry, Jade, Duck, Abigail and Rebecca steam off to find the treasure in the jungle. Morgana turns to Molly, Oliver, Donald, Douglas and Bertha.*

Morgana: Nos. 32, 11, 9, 10 and 85. I need you to hunt for some other treasure hidden amongst those cliffs there.

*Morgana points to a cliffside on the left of the cave.*

Bertha: Fine by me, ma'am.

Oliver: I don't know... Those cliffs look mighty dangerous if I take one glance at it.

Donald: Och, dinna fash yourself, Oliver. We've got our mountaineering gear with us. So it shouldn't be a hassle.

Oliver: Alright. Donald, if you insist.

*Donald, Douglas, Oliver, Molly and Bertha head over to the cliffside. Leeko turns to Emily, Toby, Chloe, Rosie, Holly and Nia.*

Leeko: You lot, I need you to climb up that mountain and find some treasure up there.

*Leeko points to a mountain on the top of the cave.*

Chloe: All the way up there? You must be joking.

Nia: Don't worry, Chloe. I'm an adventurer. I'll help you and the others through.

Chloe: Thank you, Nia. Really appreciate it.

*Emily, Toby, Chloe, Rosie, Holly and Nia head over to the mountain, leaving only four engines which are Thomas, Percy, James and Edward. Mila turns to them.*

Mila: Well, I guess that leaves you four to come with us.

Percy: In the dark cave? I don't want to go in there.

Thomas: We have to, Percy. Even if we make it out alive or not.

Darious: Thomas is right, Percy. Morgana will be your commanding officer until you and the others return. Please follow her orders as you would mine.

Morgana: Alright, maggots. Let's move out!

Percy: *ahem* The correct term is "puffball". If you're gonna say insults, say them right.

Morgana: Okay...

*Scene changes to inside the dark cave where Thomas, James, Percy, Edward, Mila, Leeko and Morgana are hunting for treasure.*

Edward: So, Morgana. Do you think these so-called "rumours" are true? That there might be a monster guarding the treasure?

Morgana: We'll find out, won't we, No. 2?

Edward: Erm... I suppose...

Leeko: Well, let's just say there is. What's your plan for dealing with it, if there is one?

Percy: For me, I'd wet myself, scream like a little girl and run out of the cave, crying for my mommy.

Thomas: I'm with him.

Edward: Well, that depends on what kind of monster we're dealing with, right?

Percy: So, we don't even...

James: Percy, just shut up and enjoy the ride.

*Mila and Thomas look doubtfully at each other. Just then, the gang find a fork in the cave, In the middle of the fork is a treasure chest.*

Thomas: Is that... the treasure?!

Mila: Thomas, wait. It could be a trap.

Thomas: Trap, my ass. I'm going for the gold here.

Edward: No, Thomas! Mila's right. Look!

*Edward points to what seems to be a weird looking creature.*

Thomas: *whispering* WHAT THE F**K IS THAT?!

James: *whispering* That must be the creature guarding the treasure...

Percy: *whispering* Is it okay if I wet myself now...

Leeko: *whispering* Steady...

Morgana: *whispering* What the hell are we gonna do about that thing?

Edward: *whispering* Beats me. I don't know anything about fighting mystical creatures.

Percy: *whispering* We could always use Leeko as a bait.

Leeko: *whispering* Try it and I'll bite your arm.

Mila: *whispering* I have an idea. Maybe I should approach slowly. Thomas, you come with me.

Thomas: *whispering* WHAT?! Are you crazy, Mila? I don't want to get my ass ripped off by that... that... thing.

Mila: *whispering* I gurantee you, Thomas. I'll sacrifice my life for yours.

Thomas: *whispering* Oh... very well, then.

Mila: *whispering* But remember, Thomas. SLOWLY, so we don't startle it...

*Thomas and Mila approach the creature slowly. Thomas shuts his eyes and prepares for the worst. Suddenly, nothing happens. Thomas looks up and realizes the creature isn't as scary as he hoped.*

Thomas: Aww... he's friendly...

Mila: *sighs* Well, that's a relief.

Thomas: Hang on... there's something familiar about this creature... Of course, it's a hippogriff. I recognise these creatures, they're mystical, magic creatures.

*The others stop hiding and come closer.*

Percy: They are?

Edward: I didn't think they were that mystical.

Thomas: Haven't you ever read Harry Potter?

*Mila, Morgana and Leeko stay silent.*

Thomas: Oh, right... You're pirates. You haven't got any of the books. But a creature like this shouldn't be lurking about in a dark, gloomy cave like this. *turns to the creature.* You, sir, should go to Hogwarts. It's a perfect place for hippogriffs like you. They'll feed you and care for you and make

you more strong and alive.

*The hippogriff smiles at Thomas, nods in agreement and walks off, leaving the engines and pirates, amazed.*

Mila: Wha... where's he going?

Thomas: To a much better future.

Morgana: Oh, who cares about that? Now's our chance to get that treasure.

Percy: Give me a look.

*Percy opens the chest, much to his dismay.*

Percy: What is this? A tin cup, a few bottles, some frying pans? WHAT KIND OF TREASURE IS THIS?! There's just nothing in there except for this one coin.

Morgana: Let me see. *examines the coin that Percy's holding.* You're right, No. 6. We have a coin.

James: Oh, I knew it was too good to be true. What's so great about one coin?

Leeko: Trust me, James. Sometimes finding at least one is a lot harder than you might think. You wouldn't believe what we had to go through to find the last one.

Percy: What last one?

Mila: Never you mind about that, Percy. Please give me the coin, I can't wait to see the look on Darious' face when we tell him the good news.

Thomas: What about the other stuff?

Edward: Leave that to me. *lifts up the treasure chest and puts it in his cab.* We'll find a good use for this lot.

*The gang eventually sets off. But it isn't long before they're lost.*

James: Guys... for the last time. It was definitely this way. This cave seems to take forever.

Thomas: Well, maybe you'd learn that sooner. IF YOU HADN'T LED US AROUND THE SAME PATH IN A CIRCLE, 50 BLOODY TIMES!

*Sure enough, Thomas is right. The gang HAVE gone around in a circle in the cave, 50 times.*

James: Ahh... yes... I established that... Hold on, let me get something out.

*James opens his bufferbeam to dig something out. He eventually pulls out his "Instant TrakPak".*

James: Instant TrakPak ALWAYS helps me find my way out of here.

*James opens the TrakPak and sets to work, laying the tracks down for a way out of the cave.*

James: There we go.

*But James suddenly realises he built the track in a circle around the cave. Making his time on the path his fifty-first.*

James: OH, GOD F**KING DAMMIT!

Morgana: Ugh, we didn't have any trouble finding our way in. HOW could you get us lost heading out?

James: Hey, don't look at me. Leeko was the one driving me.

Leeko: Hey, I don't even know how to drive a locomotive of your kind.

James: Another thing, you don't REALLY think that we're lost...?

Morgana: *groans* Fine. But once you find a way out. Let us know...

James: How?

Thomas: Well, why don't you...

James: Whistle? Thanks, Captain Obvious. I'll do that.

*James races ahead of the gang to find a way out. But eventually turns back again.*

James: NOW I'VE FOUND A- *notices the others.* Oh, right... Same track... fifty-second time... sorry...

*James races ahead again and THIS time takes a different route.*

Mila: So, Thomas. You won your first fight. Feels good, doesn't it...?

Thomas: Ummm... Yeah... but it wasn't really a fight, Mila. I mean, this "monster" ended up being pretty friendly, am I right? So we didn't have to fight him.

Morgana: Hey, don't contradict her. We won fair and square, so that makes it a fight. How we won, well, that never has to leave this cave. I remember my first battle like it was yesterday.

I never felt so alive.

Thomas: Hang on... who were you and Darious fighting? Rourkie?

Morgana: Actually, I wasn't serving under Darious back in the day. I was with another crew.

Thomas: Oh... fair enough. I'd rather not say... It might cause a plothole, and I don't even know what that is...

Morgana: *scoffs* Well, you must think I'm a real piece of work. Go ahead, I can take it. I give you permission to speak freely.

Thomas: Does that count for the other engines too?

Morgana: Mm-hmm.

Thomas: Okay... erm... *thinking* Oh, crud. What do I say to a first mate...? Think man... think... Maybe it was this. *speaks* DEM BIG TIDDIES!

*thinking* No, not that thing. The other thing... *speaks* Ummm... You seem like a nice person to me?

Morgana: *scoffs* You're a bad liar, No. 1. I do what it takes to survive out here. Nothing more, nothing less. You wanna know why?

Thomas: Sure, why?

Morgana: Rourkie and I... we... both grew up on that ship, you see? Both of us were taken from our parents when we were young... *sighs* Just like Rourkie was about to take that kid at the tavern. We hunted for years... Eventually, we hunted for the same

treasure as Darious. Long story short, my crew just left me for dead when we were beaten to the punch. Darious had the treasure and he had me. If the situation was flipped, I'd have killed him without question. Or at least... tied him up. You know, tortured him for

information. Then dumped him into the ocean. The point is, No. 1. what did he have to gain from keeping me alive...?

Thomas: I don't know... His conscience, maybe?

Mila: Maybe it was.

Morgana: There was no reason... But, but... Darious is Darious. Aboard that ship, your crew is just a bunch of lying cheats,

ready to stab you in the back the second there's a coin to be made. But the Dread Pirates... well, we're a family. That's why I don't want just anybody to join up. You understand?

Thomas: I do, Morgana. I'm sorry you had to go through all of this. I mean, where would I be if the Steam Team turned their backs on me?

Edward: Exactly, Thomas has been with the railway for years. We're nothing without him, we care for him just as much as he cares for us.

Morgana: Anyways, enough of that... The point is... you... you... you and Mila did good back there.

Thomas: We did?

Mila: Thanks.

Morgana: Hey, don't get too cocky. Luck comes and goes. Don't ever let yourself get used to it.

*Just then, James' whistle sounds in the backdrop and races back, quite exhausted.*

James: Hey, I think I've found the right way this time.

Morgana: For your sake, No. 5. I hope you're right!

Thomas: *groans* He better be, or goodness knows what will happen next.

*Thomas, Mila and the gang follow James.*

*End of Scene 5*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 6:

*Thomas and the gang see the light at the end of tunnel.*

Thomas: Won't you look at that? James finally found a way out.

James: Your sarcasm never seems to impress me, Thomas.

Percy: Finally, the beautiful, beautiful... *gets a sunbeam in his eye.* Aaaargh, Oh... okay, maybe not-so-beautiful sunlight.

Mila: Ugh, after spending so much time in the underground, my eyes hurt...

Edward: Tell me about it, old chap.

Morgana: For a cartographer and navigator, Leeko and No. 5, you sure have lousy senses of direction.

James: Hey, I said I was smart, not short-sighted.

Leeko: Well, we made it, didn't we? The hard part's over.

*Thomas and the gang emerge from the cave. But no sooner have they done so when Rourkie and his pirates arrive on the scene.*

Thomas: WHAT THE-... ROURKIE??!

Rourkie: You fetched my coin for me? Hand it over. Or would you like to see your captain's brains splattered on the sand?

Thomas: Wait... what?

*Thomas and the gang gasp in horror as Brock is holding Darious hostage.*

Darious: I don't understand. One minute they weren't there, the next minute they were.

James: You b*****d! How'd you find us?

Rourkie: Abby proved quite... cooperative in the end, didn't she? Too bad she couldn't be here today.

Percy: Wait... you killed Abigail?

*Just then, Abigail turns up.*

Abigail: No, they didn't. I'm right here. I don't understand what all the fuss is going on about me being killed and- *notices Darious being held hostage.* Oh... right.

Brock: Wait... your name's ALSO Abigail?

Abigail: Yeah, so?

Brock: Great, I'm so confused now.

Rourkie: CAN IT, BROCK! The one we assassinated is the true Abigail. Her name has two Bs in it. It's usually the biggest giveaway.

Thomas: So... you KILLED HER? The Abbigail at the Tavern?!

Rourkie: And I'll kill your captain, and you too... unless you're willing to hand it over right now.

Thomas: Hand what over?

Rourkie: The coin.

Thomas: What coin?

Rourkie: The magic coin.

Thomas: What magic coin?

Rourkie: *groans* THE magic coin, the one that transforms you.

Thomas: Coins do that?

Rourkie: YES!!

Thomas: Still don't know what you're talking about.

Rourkie: *sighs* It's about the size of a £1 coin. Got that?

Thomas: £1 coin. Got it.

Rourkie: Good, so hand it over.

Thomas: Ooohh... sorry. I spent my coin on a Pepsi Max in a vending machine before we left.

Rourkie: YOU WHAT?!

Thomas: Hey, don't look at me. It was pretty decent for a Pepsi Max bottle to be sold for £1.

Rourkie: *facepalms* Do we have to go through over this?!

Thomas: As long as I usually get my Pepsi Max, then yes.

Mila: That's enough, Thomas. They'll just kill him anyway.

James: What are we supposed to do, then? Just watch him die?!

Darious: Thomas, listen to me. I'm giving you a direct order. Stay where you are, and do NOT let them have the treasure.

The world cannot bear men like Rourkie in possession of such great power. If my life is forfeit then so be it.

Thomas: Oh... erm... I...

Rourkie: I'm not going to wait all day...

Thomas: I... I... erm... I... oh... Oh, crud. What am I supposed to do in situations like this? *finally gives in* You know what... shoot me.

Rourkie: What?

Thomas: Shoot me. I can't turn you down and I can't turn the others down. I have no choice. Mattel's ruining my life and so is everything else.

Just kill me and everything will be alright. Are you REALLY wanting to kill Darious even though he's put his heart and soul into finding that treasure JUST AS MUCH AS YOU DO? Just shoot me

now and everything will be alright. The world would be a better place without me.

Rourkie: Damn, you're right. What was I thinking? Give me the gun, Brock.

*Brock gives the gun to Rourkie who aims it at Thomas.*

Rourkie: The blue steam-boy's right. We should kill him first.

Mila: THOMAS! Don't do it.

Edward: You'll doom us all.

Percy: Oh, you guys are just SO pathetic. *steams over to Rourkie, pushing Thomas out of his way.* Rourkie. I think we could settle a compromise.

I cut the coin in half so both of us can share parts of it and everyone's happy.

Rourkie: That's not how the magic works. *aims the gun at Percy.* Now get out of my way so I could kill these b*****ds.

*Percy plugs his two fingers inside Rourkie's gun.*

Percy: How'd you like them, apples?

*Rourkie opens on fire on Percy's fingers, Percy yelps in pain and nurses his poor fingers. The others watch in dismay as

Percy has his index and middle fingers complete shot off his hand by Rourkie's gun.*

Percy: I don't understand... It worked with Bugs Bunny.

*Thomas steams forward to do a negotiation with Rourkie.*

Thomas: Look, Rourkie. If you really want to kill us. You'll get our coins. BUT... you'll be missing out on an even greater treasure.

Rourkie: And what would that be?

Thomas: The treasure of... Weir Weiners.

Rourkie: Weir Weiners?!

*Thomas and Mila burst out laughing.*

Thomas: *laughs* Did you... did you see the look on his face?

Mila: *laughs* He totally fell for it. *laughs more.* Why didn't I think of that joke before?

Thomas: *stops laughing and settles down.* Anyway, that's not our real treasure. The thing is, Our ship, The Pirate's... Fat... or whatever-you-call-it, is

STUFFED with more riches than you can imagine.

Morgana: No. 1, what're you doing?!

Thomas: I'm doing the right thing, Morgana. I have this under control.

Rourkie: But you've forgotten something, haven't you? I could just kill you and then take your ship.

Thomas: Yes, but look around, Rourkie. Ships don't last long out here. The tide will turn and our ships will sink - along with THAT treasure.

WAY long before you find out where we dropped anchor.

Rourkie: What do you want, then?

Mila: First, release Darious. Then me and Thomas will take you to the ship - if you give me your word that you'll leave AND leave our crew be.

Rourkie: Fine. You have my word. BUT until you fulfill your little end of the bargain. THOMAS is my new hostage.

Thomas: Well, s**t.

Mila: *shrugs sheepishly* Sorry, Thomas. Best I could do.

Darious: Thomas! No! Don't do this...

Thomas: It's NOT my fault, Darious.

Rourkie: You call yourself a captain, Darious? And yet, even when you beg, your crew won't listen. How pathetic you've become...

Thomas: DARIOUS IS NOT PATHETIC! I can tell by working with him.

Mila: How come? You've only just been here for a day or two.

Thomas: So, you've been here four days more than us.

Rourkie: Alright, take me to the treasure and we'll be on our way.

*Thomas and Mila take Rourkie to the ship. Edward looks at Darious.*

Edward: Don't worry, Darious. We'll get your treasure replaced.

Darious: I doubt it, Edward...

*Scene changes to Thomas, Mila and Rourkie who are boarding the ship.*

Rourkie: Whoa, didn't any of you know how to drive a galleon?

Thomas: Hey, Chloe was the one driving the thing. Blame her.

Rourkie: Hey, look on the bright side. Your ship, he's a real beauty.

Brock: I still can't believe all the stuff the cap'n's got in his room.

Rourkie: *sighs* You were just there, weren't you? WHY are you having trouble believing your own eyes?

Thomas: Maybe he should've gone to Specsavers.

*Canned laughter is heard in the backdrop.*

Brock: I meant... uhhh...

Thomas: You can take as much as you want back to your ship, but NOT OUR WALLETS!

*Thomas catches Mary, nicking his wallet.*

Mary: Sorry...

Rourkie: Back to my ship? Oh, Mila and Thomas. I knew you were fools, but really? I'm already on my ship.

Thomas: Really? I don't see your name on it.

*Thomas is right, for he has painted "Property of the Steam Team and the Dread Pirates" on the deck of the ship.*

Rourkie: Whoa, mama. Well, you know what's amazing? I'm actually going to keep my word, you two.

Thomas: Wait... you are?

Mary: But... but you said...

Rourkie: Of course, I never had any intention of doing so when you made your little deal... But I just realized there's something even better than killing you.

Thomas: There is?

Rourkie: Yep, Mary. Set a course for our old vessel. We'll sink it and leave Darious and rest of his merry misfits stranded here.

Thomas and Mila: WHAT?!

Brock: We are? But for how long?

Rourkie: Well, considering I slit the throat of the only other person who knows about this place... I'd say that will be for their rest of their lives.

Brock: Good one, boss.

Rourkie: Of course, YOU TWO won't be joining them.

Thomas: Don't be silly, of course we are.

Mila: And what? Do you expect us to join you or something?

Rourkie: You just don't get it, do you. You gave in to me. You're weak, you're pathetic. What do you think the reputation of pirates would be if they all acted like you?

We'd never be feared again.

Mila: But I'm not a pirate. I'm... just... trying to do the right thing... that's all.

Thomas: Mila's right. She's only a spice merchant and I'm a stowaway tank engine that's going on holiday to Dartmouth, or... at least I WAS.

Rourkie: I can't listen to these drivels for another second. The catgirl has to go! Brock, will you do the honours?

Brock: With pleasure, cap'n.

*Brock aims his gun and opens fire.*

Rourkie: BROCK, YOU IDIOT! You were supposed to shoot the girl. NOT THE STEAM-BOY!

*Thomas has been shot in his arm and is nursing it really badly.*

Thomas: *groans* It's okay, Rourkie. I've been through this a few times. It's natural... ow...

Brock: Sorry, cap'n. I'll do it again.

*Brock tries to fire his gun again but it's not open firing.*

Brock: Aw, drat... out of bullets.

Rourkie: *groans* WHY must I do everything myself?

*But whilst Rourkie is getting his gun ready, Thomas and Mila abandon ship. The two are now underwater.*

Thomas: *gurgling* I don't see how THIS is gonna work, Mila.

Mila: *gurgling* Sorry, Thomas... I know I should've told you earlier but...

*Just then, Rourkie, Brock and Mary notice some rapid bubbles coming from the surface.*

Brock: What's happening to them, they're not still alive, are they?

Rourkie: Hey, it's a cute little magic trick. But let's see them try that twice. Shoot them again.

Brock: Ummm... cap'n, you might want to look up.

Rourkie: What is it...? Oh no...

*The giant hippogriff that Thomas encountered earlier has found Rourkie and his crew and is attacking them.*

Mary: It's coming right for us...

Rourkie: Change course! Get the hell out of here!

Brock: Well, we better. The seawater's just changed brown for some reason...

Rourkie: FORGET THE F**KING SEAWATER, JUST DRIVE!!!!

*Rourkie and his crew get away with the treasure in their ship, Meanwhile Thomas and Mila struggle back onto the shore, coughing, spluttering and covered in poo.*

Thomas: MILA, Why the hell would you s**t underwater? It tastes like a pig's anus in there!

Mila: I'm sorry, It's just I get extremely constipated when I'm stressed.

Thomas: Uggh, don't remind me... And the s**t doesn't make my bullet wounds any better.

*Just then, Darious and the others are seen in the distance.*

Darious: Mila, Thomas! Is that you, are you two still intact?

Thomas: It's okay, Darious. We're all in one piece, and completely covered in cats**t.

Darious: Oh... right you are then.

Mila: It seems so... Perhaps the treasure can tell good from evil... and it wanted to protect me.

Thomas: *clears throat* You mean US.

Mila: Yes thank you, Thomas.

Darious: It certainly activated at a fortuitious moment.

James: Not to mention, le stinke.

Mila: Well, what matters most of all is that we're all safe.

Thomas: Yep, all of us engines are safe... Wait a minute... WHERE ARE THE OTHER ENGINES?!

*Just then, the Steam Team come racing back.*

Gordon: We're back, guys. What did we miss?

Toby: They do muck spreading at sea now?

Thomas: No, I'll explain once we're on the ship.

Mila: Errm... actually. We gave the ship away.

*The engines gasp in horror.*

James: YOU WHAT?!

Morgana: YOU GAVE HIM OUR SHIP?! What the hell were you thinking, guys? That you could just buy him off?! That he'd suddenly turn into a nice man if

you gave him everything he wanted?

Henry: Yeah, not to mention, me and James left our stash of pornography on that ship.

*Scene cuts to cutaway of Rourkie, Mary and Brock opening a cardboard box.*

Rourkie: Mates, we've hit the jackpot.

*Scene cuts back to the gang.*

Mila: Eh, probably not. But if there was a chance, however small, to resolve things without hurting anyone, then I had to take it. That's just who I am.

Thomas: What'd you mean YOU? WE took that chance, Mila. You and me.

Mila: Yes... and Thomas.

Leeko: Never mind whose fault it is, How are WE going to get out of here?

*The gang looks nervously at each other but they have no idea.*

Darious: Well, the answer is simple, folks. Rourkie stole our ship and now we will take his.

Thomas: That's pretty insane, BUT YET INGENIUS.

Percy: And with ALL those other shipwrecks seen around here, we can salvage them for spare parts.

Mila: What a good idea, Percy. But the only problem is... Us Dread Pirates don't have a carpenter.

Edward: Don't worry, Mila. THE STEAM TEAM will carpent your ship.

Thomas: We've got to hurry, guys. Me and Mila heard Rourkie say he wanted to sink it to strand us here.

Darious: Well, then. There's no time to lose. Morgana, Leeko, Jade and Abigail. I want you to search the coastline and locate that ship.

Morgana: On it, cap'n.

Jade: Yes, sir.

*Morgana and Leeko both board Jade and Abigail and the two engines chuff away to find Rourkie's old ship.*

Darious: Now, you two... why didn't you follow my orders?

Mila: We wanted to do the right thing, Darious.

Thomas: And because you saved me and my friends' lives. I thought I'd owe you one too.

Mila: Thomas and I knew what Rourkie was capable of, but we still had to try.

Darious: I understand... but PLEASE do not let it happen again. Besides, Thomas. What would your controller say you did the same thing to him?

Thomas: Ohh... I don't know...

*A thought bubble comes out of Thomas' funnel with The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) in it.*

The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) *fantasy*: Thomas! I am very ashamed of you, you have caused confusion and delay! You will go back to the sheds just as soon as I can arrange it.

*Thomas' thought bubble poofs in a cloud of smoke.*

Thomas: Oh my...

*Just then, Jade's whistle sounds in the backdrop.*

Jade: Captain! Captain! Come quick! We've found it! We've found it!

Leeko: Alright, Jade. That's enough.

Darious: Well, that was quick. Let's join the others. Come on, you lot.

*Darious leads Thomas, Mila and the Steam Team to where Rourkie's old ship is marooned.*

Morgana: Yep, this is Rourkie's ship, alright. Same hellhole it always was.

Toby: Don't be silly, Morgana. Nothing like a fresh coat of paint can't fix.

Darious: If we're all not happy with this ship... Well, that's just fine with me. I'm sure our dissatisfaction will motivate us all the more to reclaim The Pirate's Fate.

James: Indeed, Darious.

Darious: Leeko, please chart a course for Watchet.

Thomas: What? Again?

Darious: Well, it's better than nothing.

Thomas: I suppose so.

Darious: Chloe! Set sail for Watchet.

Chloe: Ay-ay, Cap'n.

*Chloe steers the ship off the shore and into deeper waters, ready for their expedition. They only just left the Cursed Coast when they hear an angry voice.*

Voice: ARE YOU F**KING SERIOUS, RIGHT NOW?

*The engines and pirates look up to reveal Molly, Oliver, Donald, Douglas and Bertha have been left behind and are still on the cliffs.*

Thomas: Oh! Hi, guys! Didn't expect to see you up here.

Oliver: You've already found the god damn treasure AND LEAVE THE FIVE OF US STRANDED?

Mila: Ah, sorry about that guys. Chloe, drop anchor. We have to rescue the others.

Chloe: On it.

*Chloe suddenly turns the ship too sharply.*

Mila: Nononononono, Chloe. Not too sharp, you're gonna-

*The back part of the ship crashes into the rocks and a window breaks.*

Chloe: Oops...

Darious: Ah, that's Rourkie's problem. He'll sort it.

Thomas: Sorry, Oliver. We didn't realise you guys have been left behind.

Donald: Och, but I suppose it's a fine how do you do, isn't it, Douggie?

Douglas: Aye, couldn't agree more myself, Donal'.

Bertha: Well, either way. Just get us down and nothing more will be said.

*Thomas gets out a ladder and puts it on the cliffside.*

Thomas: Alright, guys. Just get down this ladder and we'll get our asses shifting.

*Molly, Oliver, Donald, Douglas and Bertha all climb down from the cliffside.*

Thomas: Now, let's set course for Watchet.

*The ship starts sailing towards Watchet.*

Narrator: A few hours passed, and the engines and pirates had finally set their course for Watchet.

Leeko: Well, we're almost there.

Mila: Do you really think we'll find another lead?

Leeko: Word spreads fast. I'm sure the tavern has attracted a certain notoriety by now.

Mila: We need to stop by to keep an eye on other potential competitors.

Duck: And if we spot any, what do you plan to do? Give THIS ship away too?

Mila: Shut up, Duck. Thomas, I wanted your opinion, I would've have asked.

Thomas: Sure, Mila. What is it?

Duck: You shouldn't talk to me like that, missy. I'm Great Western and I have seniority over you, ya know. And if Morgana has her way, we'll leave you behind at the next stop.

Thomas: Duck, shut the hell up, you're not helping.

*Mila and Duck stand there, confused and stunned. Scene changes to the tavern where Thomas and Mila, along with Percy, James, Henry and the other Dread Pirates,

are at the bar, drinking cola. Rahiros walks over and sits next to them.*

Rahiros: Okay, I gotta be honest with you. I wasn't sure I'd see you guys again.

Thomas: I'm glad you had so much faith in us.

Rahiros: Oh, you can't blame me for that, Mr. Tank Engine. You're the first to survive. It's an impressive achievement indeed. You Dread Pirates sure do live up to your reputation.

Thomas: Well, I had a little help from a certain friend.

*Mila blushes*

Voice: Dread Pirates, you say? You're the ones looking for treasure, aren't you?

*Just then, a lizard in blonde hair dressed in some sort of Indian clothing walks over.*

Percy: And WHAT business is that of yours?

Lizard: I get it. You want me to prove my knowledge before you share yours. What a clever man you are. I suppose that's why you're the captain, am I right?

*Suddenly, Darious walks over to the lizard.*

Darious: Actually, I'm the captain of the Dread Pirates.

Thomas: And WHO, exactly, are you?

Lizard: Oh, terribly sorry. I'm Tam-Tam.

Percy: Tam-Tam? What kind of an idiotic name is that?

Thomas: Well then. Nice to meet you, Tam-Tam. *shakes Tam-Tam's hand.* I'm Thomas T. Tank Engine. North Western Railway locomotive, television star

and currently a pirate stowaway.

Mila: So, what is it do you want, exactly?

Tam-Tam: Oh, it's not about what I want. It's about what you want. I've heard of your exploits and I must say, I'm impressed.

Thomas: Why, thank you. We have LOADS of adventures on the Island of Sodor.

Tam-Tam: Not you, I'm talking about the pirates.

Thomas: *sighs* Once again, nobody likes Thomas & Friends. More than 35 years on TV and we still get nothing.

Tam-Tam: Nevertheless, with goals as grand as yours, you might be in some need of help. And perhaps some... companionship.

Thomas: Ooooh, sorry... we're full right now. The space has been occupied by the Steam Team. I'm sure the captain doesn't need any "companionship" from a two-bit floozy.

Darious: Excuse me, what?

Tam-Tam: My apologies, darling. I didn't know that you and the captain were so... close.

Thomas: We're NOT in a relationship, me and Darious are not gay. We're both straight... And whatever you're selling, we're NOT interested.

Tam-Tam: Oh, of course. I should've known you didn't need any help. What use could a crew like yours possibly have for someone like me?

Percy: I don't know? A prostitute? *laughs uneasily*

*The other engines, except Thomas, Tam-Tam and the Dread Pirates, laugh too.*

Thomas: *unenthusiastically* Yes... Percy... Very funny. Very funny indeed.

Tam-Tam: I'm only a dashing sailor, a celebrated antiquarian and fearless peer to any pirate. Oh, and did I mention,

I just happen to have a lead on the next location of the wizard's treasure? But, No, no, no, you're not interested in that, are you?

Thomas: Wait a minute... what treasure?

Mila: You know anything about the wizard's treasure?

Percy: Okay, what do you REALLY want?

Tam-Tam: I want to be a part of your crew. Nothing more and nothing less and I know you'll benefit from my... diverse array of skills and I'm certain if I joined you,

it would be the adventure of a lifetime.

Darious: I don't doubt that.

Morgana: We aren't buying your snake oil.

Henry: Yeah, beat it. Scaly. The engines had their share first.

Tam-Tam: What's the matter, cat got your tongue?

*Thomas glances anxiously at Mila.*

Thomas: Whoa, she's got me there...

Tam-Tam: Let me guess, you don't want your cut of the treasure to go down by having to share it with another hand? Right?

Morgana: I don't want my share of the treasure stolen by a backstabbing braggart.

Darious: Ummm... Morgana, she's seem to have demonstrated no threat. Anyway, we'll have to discuss it amongst ourselves, if you don't mind.

Tam-Tam: Of course, take all the time you need. I'll be just over there.

*Tam-Tam walks over to a Pacman arcade machine and starts playing.*

Morgana: Darious, you can't seriously be considering bringing that lying idiot on board.

Thomas: Oh, Darious wouldn't doubt that she's dishonest... but it might not be as you think.

Darious: Thomas is right. Perhaps she's merely playing the fool.

Morgana: What...?

Percy: To start, we believe she's telling the truth about her having a lead on the treasure.

Mila: Now what makes you say that, Percy?

Percy: Well, put it this way, Mila. Tam-Tam didn't just say she had a lead for us. She referred to it as the "wizard's treasure".

Thomas: Oh yeah, Darious told me and Mila the whole story. Few know of the treasure and far fewer still suspect its true origin.

It's possible that our meeting is no mere coincidence. Perhaps, fate...

Morgana: Really? Darious, this again? You made No. 1 bring it up?

Darious: Morgana, You're my first mate so I value your counsel.

Morgana: She's a bad egg, Darious. I just know it, just like your last ones. After what No. 1 and Mila did to this mission, you can't just let anyone on board.

Thomas: Hey, we were only doing that to save your lives, thank you very much.

Leeko: If you think we're badly off now, doesn't that mean we need all the help we can get, Morgana?

Morgana: Hmmmm... Now that you mention it. Having someone else to keep Mila and the engines in line would be a BIG help.

Mila: Hey!

Thomas: Oh no, nononononononono. You cannot be serious, Morgana. I am a privately owned locomotive and so are the other engines. We don't need to be ordered.

Morgana: But you're under pirate jurisdiction! Obey our orders, and wait until we've made our inspection!

Thomas: We ARE under jurisdiction; The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt)'s. A little wakewasher like you doesn't tell us what to do.

Darious: Alright, both of you stop this immature nonsense. *turns to Morgana* Mila is a member of this crew and Thomas is a leader of his own, whether you like it or not.

Antagonizing them doesn't serve any purpose. *turns to Thomas and Mila.* So you two, what do you think about Tam-Tam? I value your input too.

Thomas: Ermm... I'm not sure.

Mila: Well, we've come specifically for a lead and we STILL haven't found one. So... Regardless of my suspicions, it would be wrong for me not to offer her the same chance

that was given to me and the engines, What do you think, Thomas?

Thomas: Yeah... I think we should. As they always say... "Many hands make light work, except no more than two hands can fix a lightbulb in its place".

Darious: Well said, Thomas.

Tam-Tam: So are you ready for me to show you the way?

*Ugandan Knuckles appears on the counter.*

Ugandan Knuckles: DO U NO DA WAE?

Tam-Tam: Not... your... way...

Darious: Anyways, welcome aboard, Tam-Tam.

Tam-Tam: Wise choice, I'm sure we'll get along famously.

Morgana: But let's get one thing straight. We Dread Pirates respect the chain of command. I'm the first mate and that means, unless the captain says otherwise,

you'll follow my orders. Darious, Mila and the engines have soft hearts, but you'll get no mercy from me.

Thomas: Wait... didn't you say that line earlier in the film, Morgana?

Morgana: Oh yeah... so I did...

*End of Scene 6*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 7:

*The Steam Team and the Dread Pirates are out at sea on the ship. Thomas is talking to Mila and Leeko.*

Mila: The next coin's on this island, west of here always. Or so Tam-Tam says, anyways. You think she's lying?

Thomas: We'll know when we get there, right?

*Just then, Tam-Tam walks up.*

Tam-Tam: You're not talking about me, are you?

Leeko: I... better go plot our course.

*Leeko dashes off to mark the co-ordinates. Tam-Tam turns to Thomas and Mila.*

Tam-Tam: Quite a diverse crew, you've got here.

Mila: I suppose...

Tam-Tam: Only one thing they all seem to all agree on, is that you never make mistakes.

Mila: Really? I did what we thought was right at the time, me and Thomas were trying to save everyone's lives.

Tam-Tam: Oh, what happened?

Mila: Me and Thomas tried to negotiate our way out of a hostage crisis and we ended up giving away our ship. That's why we're stuck in this rickety dump.

Tam-Tam: Oh dear, how many hostages were killed?

Thomas: Fortunately, nobody got hurt. Aside from Percy who got shot in the fingers and I got shot on my arm.

Tam-Tam: Nobody got hurt except for two engines? Come now, darlings. You two successfully defused a hostage situation. They ought to be singing your praises! Sounds like they don't appreciate you, do they?

Thomas: They don't. But I appreciate Mila just as much as she appreciates me. I should be singing HER praises. Because we're both steaming AND sailing on a journey to find some treasure!

*singing* Steamin' right here, sailin' right there.

That's what we're made to be.

Just me and the Steam Team on a quest

to find out what's at sea.

We hope we will find that treasure,

and we know it won't take long.

'Cos whilst I'm working, I am singin'

The Steamin' and Sailin' song.

Mila: You know, Thomas. I do appreciate you too. You've helped me through thick and thin. I think you deserve more than you should. If you take my meaning...

*singing* Working along, singing a song and

A-sailin' with Thomas and me.

Us Dread Pirates are hunting for treasure

'cos that's what we're meant to be.

Everyone thinks we're cut-throat crooks,

But we know they're always wrong.

So that's why we get things back on float with

The Steamin' and Sailin' song.

James: Hmmm... Tam-Tam did say we should be singing their praises.

Morgana: No. 5, You really sure we should be doing this?

Darious: We helped Thomas and he's helped us. We DO owe him a favour.

Gordon: *singing* Well Sir Topham Hatt, he still has hopes on the whereabouts of his engines.

James: *singing* But somewhere on this voyage is the treasure, did we mention?

Morgana: *singing* Now listen, bud. You obviously ain't workin', as we speak.

Darious: *singing* But as a crew, we'll find our way to a worthy special TREAT...

Thomas: *speaking* You got that right! *singing* 'Cos we're steamin' right here and we're sailin' right there.

As we journey across the sea...

Mila: *singing* Is Thomas even knowing 'bout where we go?

Or is it just plain me?

Thomas: *singing* I'm guranteed we'll find our way.

Or you'll go hit my dong! (So please don't)

Mila: *singing* But whatever the weather, we'll keep on goin' with...

Thomas and Mila: *singing* The Steamin' and Sailin' song.

*Thomas and Mila eventually do a Sailor's Jig dance-off. Mila goes first and Thomas follows pursuit.*

Percy: *singing* Yo-ho-ho and a bucket of buffers,

We should make Thomas the boss.

Leeko: *singing* But he doesn't have a map of the co-ordinates

and I'm pretty sure we're lost.

Thomas: *singing* But believe me, I've been on hunts too

and I'm never always wrong.

Percy: *singing* So that's why we should always sing...

Thomas, Percy, James and Gordon: *singing* The Steamin' and Sailin' song.

Mila: *speaking* If we all pitch in and help Thomas. He might be able to help us find that treasure.

Darious: *speaking* Well, I suppose it's worth a try...

Tam-Tam: *speaking* I'm actually looking quite forward to this.

Mila: *singing* The Steam Team here, and the Dread Pirates there

we all know what to do.

Morgana: *singing* I'm pretty still skeptical about all this,

but you know it does take two.

Darious: *singing* But they could be right, if memory serves.

Leeko: *singing* We should probably tag along...

Tam-Tam: *singing* If it hasn't been for Thomas, then we wouldn't be singin'

The Dread Pirates: *singing* The Steamin' and Sailin' song.

*Thomas and Mila both do a Sailor's Jig dance together.*

Cast: *singing* It's the Steamin' and Sailin' song!

Thomas: *speaking* So, what do you think of that?

Mila: Well...

Tam-Tam: No, no. Don't answer that. I don't mean to be a busybody, well, ta-ta for now.

*Tam-Tam walks off, leaving Mila doubtful and very skeptical.*

Mila: Maybe it would be best if I listened to you more in the future, Thomas.

Thomas: Very well, then.

*End of Scene 7*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 8:

*The Steam Team and the Dread Pirates arrive at an unknown island. Although not seen, they are heard docking the boat.*

Thomas: Keep going. You're good. You're good. You're good... and... stop!

Darious: Sometimes, I wish I'd knew when you'll learn to drive these things.

*The Steam Team and the Dread Pirates disembark the ship and look around.*

Leeko: So this was the island you were telling us about?

Tam-Tam: No, Leeko. This is the imperial palace.

Percy: But... there's no palace ANYWHERE!

Tam-Tam: You'll find out eventually, green one.

Leeko: Percy's right, you don't have to be so sarcastic.

Percy: Wait... I said that?

Tam-Tam: I don't have to, but it's so much fun.

Edward: I'm not sure about this, Tam-Tam. This place appears totally... deserted.

Duck: Maybe there isn't anything or anyone there.

Mila: Or maybe, Rourkie got to the treasure first.

Thomas: *scoffs* I doubt he did, Mila. But if he does, I'm laying my fists of steel on him.

Morgana: Another thing, Mila. The only way Rourkie found the treasure first would be if you led him straight to it.

Thomas: Mila wouldn't do that... she's only just arrived. Unless you were talking about the other treasure.

Morgana: I was.

Thomas: Oh, that figures. Anyway, we shouldn't be dawdling. Onwards, noble pirates and engines!

*Thomas and the Steam Team embark on their hunt to find the other coin. They haven't gone very far when they notice a sanctuary full of safari animals.*

Thomas: Hey, guys! Look at this! There's giraffes there...

Voice: Oh my! Children, look at this! We've got guests.

Mila: Who said that?

*Just then, a lioness walks over to the gang.*

Lioness: I did, Please to meet you. Call me Circe.

Thomas: Oh, hello there, Circe. I'm Thomas and I'm with the Dread Pirates and the Steam Team.

Circe: And what brings you to my fair isle?

Thomas: We're looking for some coins, they're a little bit like this.

*Thomas borrows the coin hanging around Mila's neck and shows it to Circe.*

Circe: Oh, you're one of those.

Mila: One of what?

Circe: Treasure hunters. It's very dangerous business you know...

Mila: It may be dangerous, but we're not alone. We have each other.

Thomas: Mila's right. Dangerous business doesn't stop a really useful engine like me.

Circe: So, you're just one big happy family, then? Glad to hear it.

Thomas: Well, TWO families. Mila's a member of the Dread Pirates and I work with the Steam Team.

Mila: The Steam Team are the ones who are *clears throat* locomotives with faces.

Circe: Ah, I see.

Tam-Tam: Darlings, you might not agree with why we're out there and that's just fine.

Percy: *through gritted teeth* Tam-Tam, shut up.

Circe: It is?

Tam-Tam: We're not certainly asking you to come on board, are we? But the truth is, I heard from a very reliable source

that the treasure is here. Why don't we skip the whole song and dance and just cut right to it?

Edward: Tam-Tam, that's not the way to speak.

Circe: Very well, your source is correct. I've got one of the coins somewhere on this island.

Morgana: Then turn it over, now.

Thomas: Morgana, let me talk her through this. *clears throat* What my first mate client is trying to say is that the coin is VERY important to us, Circe,

and we'd very much appreciate it if...

Circe: Oh, I'll be happy to give you the coin.

Thomas: Really?

Circe: But first... I ask that you spend an evening with me.

*The Steam Team gasp and mutter in anxiety.*

Percy: But we already promised ourselves a trip to Dartmouth.

Circe: I understand, young sir. But I don't get many visitors these days, you know.

Duck: Spend a whole night out here? You must be bananas!

Circe: If you don't want to take me up on my offer...

Well, you're welcome to waste months digging in the dirt, looking for it. It's quite a large island. isn't it?

Darious: Of course... we'd be happy to oblige your invitation, Circe.

Thomas: Dang... and I was going to put my metal detector to good use. If I actually had one...

Circe: Oh, marvellous. I'd knew you come around. But you folks must be hungry for some real food after so long at sea.

Why don't you tell me more about your adventures over dinner.

Edward: We'd be more than delighted to, ma'am.

Circe: Oh, I can't wait to make something absolutely sumptuous for you. I'll go gather some of the harvest's bounty. Don't you wander far.

*Circe walks off to get some ingrediants, James turns to Tam-Tam.*

James: Tam-Tam, was that the woman you think holds the treasure?

Leeko: If you think she knows where the treasure is, I've got a map to sell you.

Tam-Tam: Maybe she has it, maybe she doesn't.

Percy: Ya filthy stinkin' liar! Of course she doesn't! Let's just get back on the ship and find another coin elsewhere.

Darious: Sorry, Percy. But we have to find this particular coin even if we want to or not.

Percy: Bother...

Darious: And Tam-Tam, from the way you spoke of the treasure earlier... I surmised that you indeed know if she has it.

Tam-Tam: Hmmmm... perhaps...

Morgana: Don't play games with us, missy.

Tam-Tam: Look, I told you I knew where it was, NOT who had it.

Thomas: Then, next time. Look up bloody Wikipedia. It's not that hard.

Leeko: If you don't know who has it, how can you be sure they still do? Or for that matter, that they haven't taken it and left?

Tam-Tam: I'm sure it's bound to be somewhere around here. If you doubt Circe has it, Leeko.

Let's just go and look around for it.

Leeko: Alright, there isn't much else to do around here is there? Anybody else going to join?

Morgana: You go ahead if you want. I don't think we'll find anything. There's nothing here except those, those... animals in the distance.

*Oliver is about to say something but can't remember what it is because he knows he's been beat, so he just keeps quiet.*

Mila: Do they... do they bother you?

Morgana: Erm... uh... of course not...

Nia: They do with me. I don't understand why stray giraffes are seen on a small island like this. It makes no sense.

Leeko: We all evolved from them, didn't we? So there's no need to be afraid of them, right?

Morgana: Right...

Thomas: Another thing, if Tam-Tam's bloody well lying again. I'm throwing her overboard.

Morgana: You know, I'm with you, No. 1.

*Leeko and Tam-Tam head off to find the coin.*

Darious: Now then, about those animals...

Morgana: Hey, I said wasn't scared.

Darious: No, no, not that. I'm merely curious as to why there are so many different kinds.

Mila: Different kinds?

Darious: What Nia's saying is actually right. I'm not sure a giraffe and a fox would be digenous to this kind of climate.

I suppose someone could've brought them here but... to what end?

Gordon: *scoffs* Beats me. Come on, let's get that grub Circe promised us, I'm FAMISHED.

Henry: So am I. Not to mention, it's getting dark.

Darious: Very well then, come along then. Nia, Bertha, I need you two to gather up Leeko and Tam-Tam and bring them to Circe's place.

Nia: On it.

Bertha: Right away, captain.

*Nia and Bertha set off the find Leeko and Tam-Tam, whilst the others all gather up at Circe's place. Scene changes to a campfire outside Circe's cottage where the gang are eating.*

Circe: So, enjoying your watercress buns?

Thomas: Eh, not as good as the ones they have in Hampshire.

Leeko: *eating his watercress bun.* Yeah, you bet...

Circe: They're a favourite among my children too.

Edward: So, are your kids going to be joining us for dinner?

Circe: I've already fed them... the animals, that is. I call them my children because they've got nobody else looking out for them, you know.

Mila: Wait... so there's nobody else on this island except for you?

Circe: That's right, we're all on our own out here. I like it that way.

Duck: You certainly have a big job, then. There must be EVERY type of animal here.

Circe: Well, not every type... But I'm sure you lot didn't come here to hear me ramble on and on about my life.

I want to hear more about what you've been up to.

Mila: Well, let's see, where do we begin?

Circe: Wait, wait, wait... Let me see if can tell the story for you.

Thomas: *whispers to Mila.* I bet she'll get it wrong.

Circe: You've experienced fatigue, Misery and Tragedy. Every day you have to grapple with difficult questions.

Thomas: Yep, and nothing more.

Circe: You long to rest and yet your work is never over.

Thomas: Tell me about it. But that's not what our lives are like.

Circe: You said that you don't fear danger because you look out for each other. But how loyal can pirates really be?

Thomas: Good question, I don't know...

Circe: How do you know the person standing next to you wouldn't stab you in the back for an extra share of the coin?

Thomas: Easy, I'm made of metal. You can't stab metal.

Mila: You can... In many different ways... ways I can't think of...

Darious: Despite what you've heard, we're not really pirates. We're treasure hunters and we've tried to avoid bloodshed.

Circe: I just can't accept that. It's a dog eat dog world out there. *turns to Darious and Leeko.* No offence intended.

Darious: None taken.

Circe: Don't pirates fight and steal all the time?

Thomas: Yes, but these pirates are SPECIAL. They...

*Before Thomas can speak, Morgana covers his mouth to stop him from talking nonsense.*

Morgana: *nervous laugh* We've had plenty of fighting and stealing! We fought Rourkie and thanks to Mila and No. 1 here. He stole our ship, along with all our treasure.

Circe: Is that so?

Mila: It was a little more complicated than that...

Thomas: Yeah, we didn't know and you're already judging us...

Toby: How exactly?

*But before Thomas and Mila can reply, Circe yawns*

Circe: Oh... I'm feeling a bit tired.

Percy: Great, let's get outta here.

Circe: No, no, no! Sleep under the stars tonight, I insist.

Leeko: Don't you have a tent, or sleeping bags or something?

Circe: Who would want any of that on a warm night like this? Besides, sleeping directly on the Earth promotes good dreams.

Percy: God said that?!

Darious: Alright, as you wish, Circe.

Morgana: What? We're staying out here?!

Darious: Yes, but we leave first thing tomorrow morning, with the coin as you agreed, Circe.

Circe: Yes, of course.

Henry: Wait... can I get seconds on this soup?

Circe: Go right ahead.

*Scene changes to Thomas, Percy, Mila, Morgana and Darious sit on top of a flat slope, under the stars.*

Narrator: Later as the engines were tucking in for the night,

Morgana, Darious, Mila, Thomas and Percy stayed out for a little longer to

discuss what to do about their expedition.

Morgana: That crazy old loon doesn't have the coins, she's probably just lonely for company. Tam-Tam's led us on a wild goose chase.

Darious: I can't say with certitude if she does indeed have the coin, but Circe is clearly hiding something...

I think gaining her trust COULD be the key to revealing what that might be.

Thomas: You're right, Darious. If Circe approaches us, we'll humour her. If she asks us any questions, be honest.

Percy: Even about the coins?

Darious: Yes, Percy. Even about the coins.

Morgana: But she might want to steal our coins, or our ship. Haven't we had enough of that?!

Darious: Fair point, Morgana. You can stay on the ship and stand guard until we return.

Morgana: Ay-ay cap'n. No. 6, you're coming with me.

Percy: Why?

Morgana: Because you seem like the most savage of the smaller engines. I could do with a help like you.

Percy: Well, it's usually Thomas who's savage but... oh why not?

*Percy follows Morgana to the ship, Darious stays with Thomas and Mila.*

Darious: You two, we haven't had a chance to talk much. Since what happened at the Cursed Coast, I can understand if you feel like you're both

persona non grata around here. The crew mourns the loss of the Pirate's Fate and yearns for the revenge against Rourkie.

Complaining about what you two did merely serves as an outlet for venting frustrations. reJust try not to take it too personally.

Mila: I'll try...

Thomas: We'll be careful, Darious.

Darious: You have another chance to prove yourselves, Mila and Thomas. Tonight, try to talk to Circe. Gain her trust, find out where she keeps that coin. Despite her promise, I highly doubt she'll

reveal it without a little persuasion.

Mila: We'll give it our all, sir.

Thomas: You can count on us, sir. We're really useful.

Darious: I know you will, Mila and Thomas.

*Mila climbs on Thomas' footplate.*

Mila: Come on, Thomas. Let's go and talk to Circe.

Thomas: *whispers to Mila.* This is some ungrateful bulls**t, Mila. We saved Darious' life and he's giving us the s**t.

*Thomas steams over to where Circe is sleeping under a tree. She wakes up when she sees Thomas chuffing towards her.*

Circe: What's the matter, Thomas? Can't sleep?

Thomas: Nope... I can't... not even Mila can either.

Circe: The rest of the crew are sleeping... oh... they hate you, don't they?

Thomas: Well, no... Mila likes me, Morgana certainly isn't a fan but...

Circe: Even your captain's eyes fell when that woman described how you were responsible for losing his ship. He was so... disappointed in you, wasn't he?

Mila: I'm... not sure. He said some kind words to us earlier.

Circe: Was he really being kind or was he just humouring you?

Thomas: We're not sure about that, either.

Circe: Let me ask you two, when was the last time you were happy?

Thomas: What'd you mean?

Circe: Day in, day out, you live with the pirate's life. When do you get to enjoy yourself or have fun?

Thomas: Ummm... That's not what this is about.

Circe: No respect and no fun? How tragic. But I can help.

Thomas and Mila: You can?

Circe: I can help you live the kind of life that a noble soul like yours deserves.

I help people in the only way that matters. Curing their woes and worries.

Thomas: How?

Circe: Mediate with me, let's think of some spirit animals for you...

Thomas: Ummm... but Mila's a cat...

*Mila puts her hand on Thomas' mouth to shut him up.*

Mila: -tastrophic spice merchant. That's what he was saying. Anyway, which animal?

Circe: Let's think of some species that's known for being happy.

A playful monkey and a brave reindeer perhaps? Close your eyes, take my hands and concentrate.

*Thomas and Mila close their eyes and hold both of Circe's hands.*

Circe: Tell me you want all your cares and worries to end.

Thomas and Mila: We want our worries to end...

*Suddenly a flash of light occurs, Thomas and Mila open their eyes and look around to find nothing has happened.*

Thomas: Well... now what...?

Voice: DON'T TOUCH HER!

Thomas: What the... who said that?

*Just then, Thomas and Mila turn around to find a strange looking monkey.*

Mila: What the-...? WHO ARE YOU AND WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?!

Monkey: I'm you, Mila, and I come from the future.

Thomas: Whoa, mama! They let your future self come in. You grow into a monkey?

Mila: Ummm... not that I know of.

Thomas: Are we living in a universe where one animal grows up to become another?! What's in for me? Me growing up to be a car? I'm over 100 years old and I've spent my entire life as an engine.

Voice: I wouldn't say that...

*Thomas turns around to find a reindeer engine, similar to Jade, that looks just like him.*

Thomas: Wait... don't tell me... you're me from the future.

Future Thomas: Damn right.

Mila: How's that even possible?!

Monkey Mila: There's a type of coin that lets you travel back, change your past. It's called Shape What You Were.

Thomas: Oh yeah, I've heard of those. We call them time machines.

Future Thomas: Oh, time machines never existed. We use coins to travel backwards and forwards now.

Thomas: Money makes you time travel now?

Future Thomas: No, just the special coins. Not actual money.

Thomas: Right...

Mila: Yes, but anyways, why do you look like that?

Monkey Mila: Circe here tries to turn you into a feral monkey. When that doesn't work, she manages to sneak on board the ship. Then she turns the whole world into feral beasts.

Thomas: HOLD UP! Is THAT what she's been doing on this island?!

Mila: But... your children, they were all guests to your island. You turned them into these animals, didn't you?

Circe: Can you blame me? Everyone had a sob story. But I made...

Future Thomas: Yes, yes. We heard this b***h ONE HUNDRED TIMES!

Thomas: A hundred times? So... you've gone back in time to this moment before, haven't you?

Monkey Mila: We keep replaying our choices over and over,

hoping for a better outcome for this mission. But no matter what we do, it turns out terrible.

Future Thomas: Exactly, but not this time. This time, we're not going back, we're staying in the past.

Mila: How's THAT going to work? Are there really going to be two Milas?

Thomas: Also, there can be ONLY ONE BLUE NO. 1 ENGINE ON THE NORTH WESTERN RAILWAY. THAT BEING ME!

Future Thomas: Ah, you're right. What were we thinking? That does sound a little awkward.

Monkey Mila: I've got an idea,

We'll just kill these two and leave them on this island with Circe,

the crew will NEVER know the difference, right?

Future Thomas: Capital idea.

Thomas: What? NO! You can't do that.

Mila: We haven't gotten to know each other properly.

Thomas: You'll erase our existance...

Monkey Mila: Wait... what?

Future Thomas: Hang on, Mila. He's got a point.

Monkey Mila: Very well, get the bats out, we're knocking them out instead.

Thomas and Mila: Wait, NO!

*Suddenly, just as Monkey Mila and Future Thomas bonk normal Thomas and Mila over the heads, the screen suddenly turns black. Thomas and Mila eventually pop up on a black, empty background.*

Thomas: Oh... what happened? Did we waste a perfectly good scene?

Mila: No, we didn't, Thomas. I just didn't like this one so I asked the producers if we could change it.

It would help the story go a little further. What about you?

Thomas: Eh, works with me.

*Thomas lets off steam back to the scene where he and Mila where holding hands with Circe.*

Circe: Tell me you want all your cares and worries to end.

Thomas and Mila: We want our worries to...

Thomas: MILA, NO!

*Thomas smacks Mila on the back of her head.*

Mila: Ouch! What was that for?

Thomas: I did it with love, Mila. What is exactly going to happen to us?

Circe: You're never going to have to worry about anything ever again.

Mila: That still seems a little vague.

Thomas: Yeah... not to mention worrying actually DOES make us a lot more happier.

Circe: Trust me, Thomas. It's better this way.

Thomas: Yes, but we've run into some bad luck trusting people lately.

Circe: Just grab my hand.

Thomas: No, thank you. I am NOT touching that filthy, unwashed grabber of yours.

Mila: Yeah, get away from us!

Circe: But you'll be at peace once you're one of my children.

Thomas: HA! I KNEW IT! You don't have children! You turned your so-called "visitors" into feral animals. Well, you're NOT taking us next!

Mila: Yeah, is that what you've been doing here?! Thomas is right, your "children"... they were all guests to your island. You DID turn them into animals, did you?

Circe: Can you blame me? Everyone had a sob story. But I made their pain go away, forever... I'm restoring us back to the noble savages we once were. I'm liberating life from the shackles of knowledge. Can you not see?

Thomas: You're not a liberator. You're a liar, that's what you are. A lying, decieving, dirty, fat b***h is what you are!

Mila: Sure, life can be cruel. But from that cruelty can come great bravery and great grace. We've seen how bad the world can be and we're determined to fix it. I wouldn't want an easy, meaningless life. I want my life to make a difference, even it that means I have to suffer.

Circe: You're determined to fix it? What a joke!

There is only one way to fix it. My way! Now GET OVER HERE!

Thomas: Oh, we'll make sure of that.

*Thomas blows his whistle really loud. So loud that Mila and Circe cover their ears. Darious, Gordon and James come racing to the scene.*

Darious: Mila, I heard shouting!

Gordon: And we heard whistling, little Thomas. What's wrong?

James: Is everything alright over here? What's going on?

Thomas: You guys want the truth? I'll give you the truth!

All of Circe's children were actually other travelers, like us! She turned them into these feral beasts!

Mila: She was going to make us her next victims!

Darious: WHAT? Is that true?!

Gordon: You, Circe? Turning people into wild animals - to fill up your little menagerie?

Circe: To help them! They'd thank me if they could still speak.

Mila: Darious, she was going to turn me into a feral monkey!

Thomas: And me into a feral reindeer! *breaking down in tears* Darious, WE SAW THE FUTURE! It was there, right before our very own eyes!

Darious: How could you think you're helping them?

We've only elevated ourselves through our own ingenuity and determination.

Circe: Oh, I'm sure your road to hell is PAVED with good intentions.

James: Our road to wha-?

Gordon: We're on a quest to use the coins to help everyone, including us.

You, Circe, have been perverting them for your own selfish, delusional scheme.

Mila: Gordon's right. You're one of them.

Circe: One of who?

Darious: Just think if every great innovator had thought as you did. Why, we'd never have-

Thomas: *whistles* Alright, you two! Lay off the philosohpizing for a few minutes, will ya?

Mila: Our very identities were nearly extinguished! And just think of what we might look like?

Gordon: You're right, Mila. Let's get the coin and go.

James: She must have it on her, THAT'S how she was transforming people.

Darious: Yes, we tried to be civil with you. But clearly we cannot allow that coin to remain in your possession, Circe. For the sake of the others who may visit. We must take it.

Gordon: Indeed, We have what we came here for. Let's wake the others and move out.

*Gordon and Darious head back to their place.*

Thomas: But what about the coin?

Darious: Never mind that, Thomas. I'm just alerting the others. You lot know what to do.

Mila: Do what now?

James: Step aside, let me handle this.

*James gets out a gun and points it at Circe.*

James: Eat lead, hellspawn.

*James shoots Circe in the brain, from her point-of-view. Thomas and Mila watch in shock and disgust. James pulls up beside them with the coin in his hand.*

James: There we go, wasn't so hard now, was it? Now, back to the campground.

*James steams away and Thomas and Mila follow him back to the camping place where Leeko, Tam-Tam and the other engines are all resting.*

Leeko: What's going on, what happened?

James: We have the coin. She was trying to use it as a weapon against Mila and Thomas.

Duck: A... w-w-w-w-weapon?

Darious: Circe's been turning people into feral animals.

Tam-Tam: Wait, she was? Oh, oh my. That nice little woman? Who could have possibly suspected she was capable of such a thing?

Gordon: Well, Morgana didn't much care for her... Then again, Morgana doesn't care for most people she encounters. So, I'd hardly call her prescient.

Darious: But in any event, we should return to her as soon as we can.

Thomas: And all in good time. I didn't want to be stuck on this hellhole anymore.

Mila: I think we all don't, Thomas.

*Thomas, the Dread Pirates and the Steam Team head back to the ship.*

*End of Scene 8*

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Scene 9:

*Thomas, the Dread Pirates and the Steam Team are heading back to the ship where Percy and Morgana are on guard.*

Morgana: Back so soon? Finally gave up on Tam-Tam's stupid wild goose chase?

Thomas: Actually, There WAS NO goose chase, Tam-Tam was telling the truth.

Darious: And on the contrary, the coin was just there, just like Tam-Tam said it would be.

Percy: What? Is that supposed to be a joke? You're joking, right? If so, I'm not laughing. Oh, what's the punchline, that Mila and Thomas found where it was?

Mila: Actually, yes, Percy. That is PRECISELY what happened.

Percy: Wait... what... how... how did you do that?!

James: Apparently, Circe was going around turning everyone into feral animals with the coin.

Morgana: She WHAT? And how did Mila and No. 1 figure this out all by themselves?

Tam-Tam: Well, Mila nearly let Circe transform her into a wild ape.

Darious: And she nearly turned Thomas into a reindeer.

Morgana: Nearly? Too bad she didn't finish the job! A real chimp and a woodland freak would be better pirates than you, Mila and No. 1.

Thomas: Hey! We...

Darious: Alright, Thomas. Let me handle this. Mila and Thomas were instrumental in obtaining the coin. They bravely confronted Circe's lies and deceptions. Shortly thereafter, the coin was taken by force.

James: And I blew Circe's brains out... Oh dear, did I say that out loud?

*Thomas and Mila look at each other in angst.*

Tam-Tam: I had no idea, I was so lucky to serve beside heroes, Mila and Thomas.

Morgana: Heroes? Them! Oh, come on!

Darious: Alright now, Morgana. raise the anchor and rig the sails. We're leaving. Leeko, Tam-Tam, start mapping out possible locations for Rourkie. We need to stay on his trail. Chloe, man the ship's wheel.

Chloe: Ay-ay, cap'n.

Darious: Percy, climb on the top pole and be on a look out for any certain lands.

Percy: Yes, sir!

*Percy climbs up the pole to the top of the ship to keep a good lookout.*

Darious: Thomas, Mila... speak to me again before you head below deck, won't you?

Thomas: *whispers to Mila.* Oh bother, here we go again...

*Darious walks to another part of the ship whilst Thomas and Mila watch in angst. Just then, Tam-Tam walks up beside them.*

Tam-Tam: Well, our fortunes sure have changed around here, eh? Congrats, darlings. Go on, don't keep him waiting.

Thomas: Oh... I'm going to regret this.

Mila: Me too...

*Thomas and Mila walk nervously to the other part of the ship. But then, Thomas suddenly stops.*

Thomas: Wait a minute... Tam-Tam. Earlier, you said something I found strange...

Tam-Tam: I don't know what you're talking about, darling...

Thomas: How did you know which animals me and Mila were going to be turned into?

Mila: Yeah, you said Circe nearly turned me into a wild ape. How did you know that?

Thomas: What are you, a psychic or something?

Tam-Tam: You mentioned it, didn't you?

Thomas: I don't think we did. Or... not to my knowledge.

Tam-Tam: Then it must've been Darious. He said Circe attacked you, didn't he?

Mila: Darious did mention wild animals but he didn't mention WHICH animal.

Tam-Tam: Well, she had to try and turn you two into something, didn't she? If you're so sure nobody mentioned it, maybe it was a lucky guess on my part.

Thomas: *scoffs* Sounds pretty unlikely.

Tam-Tam: I heartily agree. You probably just forgot that you mentioned it, right?

Mila: Well, maybe we did. But that was a long night.

Tam-Tam: I understand, you two. Now, go. Don't keep Darious waiting.

Thomas: Oh, right! Darious! Thanks for reminding us, Tam-Tam. Come on, Mila. We've got a meeting to discuss.

Mila: Right on it, Thomas.

*Thomas steams up to Darious and Mila follows.*

Darious: I heard part of your conversation with Circe. I don't blame you for your feelings. I'm sure I'd feel quite similarly in your situation.

That's why I tried to talk you up to the crew. Morgana might not have acted like this, but even she was impressed by your bravery.

Thomas: She was?

Mila: Our... bravery?

Darious: You might not feel like you were brave, but who knows what would've happened if Circe targeted anyone else? I'm proud of you both.

Thomas: Oh... erm... Thanks... Darious.

Darious: Even after everything that's happened, you were willing to soldier on and confront Circe. But it is important that you know this - the risks we've taken, the indignities you've suffered, are all for a greater purpose.

Once we have gathered all of the coins, I believe we'll be able to change the world.

Thomas: And take us home?

Darious: Yes, and take you home, Thomas.

Mila: Change the world? But how?

Darious: I'm not sure, but I believe that was the goal of the wizard - to see if the coins could be reunited. If we can succeed, we can fulfill his vision for healing the world, whatever that may have been.

Thomas: But is "healing" a good idea?

Mila: Yeah, Is it really our place to want to heal the world?

Darious: Well, why not?

Mila: Because it might change people's motivations... you know, make them less good. Sickness and sorrow help create empathy, right? Why bother being good if everything's fine?

And what's the point of caring about others when nobody needs help?

Darious: Hmmm... I hadn't thought of it like that. Still... you two, would you still strive to be good even if there was no affirmative reason compelling you to do so?

Mila: Yeah... I think I would.

Thomas: I agree with Mila.

Darious: As would I, I suspect. So perhaps that won't be a problem after all. Still, it's very perceptive of you two.

*As Thomas and Mila head back down to the deck, Thomas turns to Mila.*

Thomas: You know, Mila. I've always feel like we've travelled all the seven seas.

Mila: Not entirely, Thomas. There are still some places we need to look.

Thomas: Most certainly indeed. But believe me, it's not as bad as sailing in the Dogger Bank.

Mila: The Dogger Bank? Oh, I've heard of that place, That's near Yorkshire, ain't it?

Thomas: Yep, the very same. *gets out guitar.* I heard a l'il sea shanty about this Dogger Bank place.

Mila: Really?

Thomas: *tunes guitar* Yeah, my friend SpongeBob told me. *plays guitar* It's a old sailor mouth sea shanty. It's pretty good.

*singing* Sailin' over the Dogger Bank, Oh, wasn't it a treat?

Wind a-blowing east-nor'-east, we had to give a s**t!

You ought to see us runnin' the wind a-blowin' free,

On a passage from the Dogger Bank to great Grimsby.

Steam Team: *singing* Watch out, twigger, she's a proper ju-be-ju.

Give 'er a sheet and let her rip we're the boys to pull her through!

You ought to see us runnin', the wind a-blowin' free,

On a passage from the Dogger Bank to great Grimsby!

Thomas: *singing* Darious he's a hound captain. He loves a pint of good ale.

Percy: *singing* Morgana, she's a first mate b****, been seen in many's a jail.

James: *singing* And Leeko, he's a cartographer. he comes from the Pembrokeshire Isle.

Toby: *singing* And take a look at Old Tam-Tam, she gets us b****rs wild!

Steam Team: *singing* Watch out, twigger, she's a proper ju-be-ju.

Give 'er a sheet and let her rip we're the boys to pull her through!

You ought to see us runnin', the wind a-blowin' free,

On a passage from the Dogger Bank to great Grimsby!

Thomas: *singing* Watch out, twigger, as down the street she came.

Percy: *singing* Sharp claws and furry toes, Mila is on the game.

James: *singing* Mila is one of your flash girls, can't she cut a shine?

Toby: *singing* She can do the double shuffle on the Knickerbocker line!

Steam Team: *singing* Watch out, twigger, she's a proper ju-be-ju.

Give 'er a sheet and let her rip we're the boys to pull her through!

You ought to see us runnin', the wind a-blowin' free,

On a passage from the Dogger Bank to great Grimsby!

*The Steam Team and the Dread Pirates dance to the sea shanty whilst Duck plays the accordion, Chloe plays the tuba, Nia plays the guitar and Oliver plays the flute followed by

Edward and his violin solo.*

Steam Team and Dread Pirates: *singing* We are the guys to make a noise when we come home from sea.

We get right drunk, we roll on the floor, we have a jubilee.

We get right drunk and full of beer, we roll all over the floor,

And when our rent it is all spent we go to sea for more.

Watch out, twigger, she's a proper ju-be-ju.

Give 'er a sheet and let her rip we're the boys to pull her through!

You ought to see us runnin', the wind a-blowin' free,

On a passage from the Dogger Bank to great Grimsby!

Thomas: *singing* On a passage from the Dogger Bank to GREAT GRIMSBY!

Mila: Dang... that was a pretty good sea shanty. I'm surprised you know something about it.

Thomas: Oh, that's just a l'il surprise, that's all.

*Just then, Leeko and Molly show up.*

Molly: So, it's been a long night, huh?

Thomas: Well, easy for someone who didn't speak to me since the start of the film.

Leeko: Well, a little longer for you than for me, huh?

Mila: You mean our encounter with Circe?

Leeko: "Encounter"? Oh. please. You heard the captain! You two are heroes, and Tam-Tam's great too. She led us right to the coin.

Thomas: What are you guys saying?

Molly: *clears throat* There's a reason why these pirates doubted us earlier, Thomas. After you two gave away their ship, well... We're not exactly proud of this either, but it was nice not beingthe most pathetic member of the crew for a change.

But after today, I can see that they're right back to business as usual.

Mila: We're sorry, Molly.

Leeko: Ah, Not as sorry as we are. Molly shouldn't have criticized you because of our own hang ups.

Molly: I guess we just have to get used to being useless, huh?

Mila: I think you're useful. But you'll grow and learn eventually.

Thomas: Mila's right. You could grow into your own role here. I'm sure back when you were a merchant, you didn't know everything right away, did you Leeko?

Leeko: Truth be told, Thomas. I wasn't a very good merchant either. At last, whilst I'm on this ship, when the history books are written.

I'll be remembered for something big. Even if it's for being the smallest part of that big something. Assuming we make it, you know? Anyways, I've rambled long enough.

Thomas: Yeah... me too. Come on, Mila. Let's hit the hay, I'm tired after all this.

Mila: *yawns* Me too.

*Thomas and Mila head off to another part of the ship to rest.*

Thomas: You know, Mila. I never thought being a pirate would be so exciting.

Mila: Me too, Thomas. And I never get to see loads of engines these days. Anyways, good night.

Thomas: Good night.

*Thomas and Mila settle down to sleep. Scene changes to the ship docked at Ilfracombe Harbour at day time.*

Narrator: The next morning, The Steam Team and the Dread Pirates had arrived at a place called Ilfracombe, because the Dread Pirates knew that there might be some treasure nearby.

*Darious is talking with Thomas and the Dread Pirates.*

Thomas: Oh, a pie shop, Darious, really?

Darious: I've considered it from all angles, Thomas. Trento's shop is a good candidate for possessing a coin.

Tam-Tam: Trento's? Oh, I've heard of it. They're not just ANY pie shop. These pies are really sinful and decadent. We're talking better than sex good.

Thomas: Oh, so it's better than the juice in the caboose, the train in the tunnel, *does hand-gestures* the bawk, bawk, bawk?

Mila: Alright, Thomas. Shut up.

Leeko: I didn't realize you were so... hungry.

Darious: The point is, if the food is this good, magic must be involved.

Thomas: Wow, what a sad cynical time we live in, huh? A place that makes superb pies and we automatically suspect sorcery. Gentleman, we live in a society.

Morgana: More importantly, Rourkie always did have a bit of a sweet tooth. Seemed as good a place as any to try and find him.

Darious: Anyway, we shouldn't be dillydallying. Thomas, round up your friends and get yourself and Mila ready. We're on a quest to find that shop.

Thomas: On it, Darious.

*As the Dread Pirates disembark for their hunt, Thomas and Mila look for Percy and James. Meanwhile, Percy and James are looking around the inside of the ship.*

James: You know, Percy. That was a crazy experience on Circe's island, am I right?

Percy: Yep, good times.

James: That was last night.

Percy: So what are we gonna do today?

James: It isn't today, Percy! Today's the first day of eternity.

Percy: Eterny? What's that?

James: ETERNITY, Percy. It means forever. And the reason why I'm saying that is because I've just found out. I'm f**king immortal.

Percy: Well, congratu-damn-lations.

James: Thank you.

Percy: That's a big deal. Quick question, am I immortal?

James: Well, no. But you could be! I mean he loves the small and the green and the cheeky and accident-prone, and look at you! You're all of those things.

Percy: Who are you talking about? Who loves me?

James: *Pats smokebox saddle.* The guy in here, Percy. *holds up book.* And the guy in here, The Bible!

*Percy looks at the book but the Bible that James is holding actually says "The Bibe".*

Percy: But it says The Bibe...

James: YOU DARE QUESTION THE WORDS OF THE ALMIGHTY JEBUS?

Percy: Ah... No... I... uh...

James: Should you better kneel down *gets down on his frames.* And pray to Jebus with me, right freaking now!

*Percy steams up to James, gets down on his frames and puts his hands together as a prayer. Just then, Thomas and Mila arrive on the scene.*

Thomas: What are you guys doing?

James: Ummm... we're looking for a booger he dropped on the deck because I told him we don't put our boogers on deck so we're trying to find it and put it on the table.

Percy: Hey, guys. You wanna become immortal?

James: *through gritted teeth.* They're NOT CHOSEN. *turns to Thomas and Mila.* Jebus want no pussies in his possy.

Mila: *picks up the book.* This is spelt "Bibe", James.

James: *smacks the book out of Mila's hand.* Oh, you're reading now? Suck it!

Percy: *gets up on his wheels again.* Come on, James. Why can't Thomas and Mila be immortal?

James: *gets up on his wheels again.* They'll never enter the kingdom with us.

Thomas: What kingdom?

James: The Kingdom... of... Kung! It's in the book.

Mila: *picks up the book and reads it.* The Bibe, Jebus and Kingdom Kung...

James: It's up in the clouds with Lunko, and didn't I tell you to suck it?! And I don't hear any *does hand-gestures* gluck, gluck, gluck, gluck!

Mila: You know this book is self-published?

James: Yes, like many ancient texts.

Thomas: On the back of a bunch of pharmacy labels?

James: Do not blaspheme the book of marijuana! Come on, Percy. Follow me down the righteous path. Begone, ye seafur!

Mila: I work here. You're the one who's leaving.

*James and Percy leave the ship and into the harbour.*

James: And leaving we are! Onward... so!

*James and Percy follow the other engines to the pie shop, Mila and Thomas watch in disgust.*

Mila: Hmmm... immortality indeed. Just a bunch of seadog scuff.

Thomas: Yeah... no-one lives forever...

*Scene cuts to Thomas and Mila bathing near some rocks. Thomas is rubbing some shampoo in his smokebox and hair.*

Thomas: ...Not without Heads and Shoulders shampoo they don't. Yeah...

*Just then, Toby and Tam-Tam turn up.*

Toby: Hey, you guys. You coming?

Thomas: To the pie-shop? Yeah, we might catch you later. Darious did say I have to get Mila ready.

Mila: And why didn't I think of this before? This is far better than the hot springs I've been to.

Thomas: You lucky... I wish I could go to a hot springs.

Tam-Tam: Okay, suit yourselves. You know where to find us.

*Tam-Tam climbs aboard Toby and he departs, leaving Thomas and Mila, still bathing.*

Mila: Maybe, we should go and catch up with them.

Thomas: Nah, stay for a little longer. You haven't tried my shampoo.

Mila: Oh, so I didn't. Squirt me some, Thomas.

*Thomas squirts some shampoo into Mila's hand and she applies it to her hair.*

Mila: Oh yeah, that's the stuff.

*Scene changes to Mila and Thomas pulling up outside the pie shop.*

Thomas: Well, here we are, Trento's, that's the name of Trento's shop, right?

Mila: It certainly is, Thomas. Come on, let's go inside.

*Thomas and Mila enter the building where the others are waiting.*

Darious: Aha, Thomas, Mila. Glad you two could show up.

Thomas: Thanks, Darious. We knew we would.

*Just then, Trento, a brown bear in baker's clothing, walks over to them.*

Trento: Welcome to Trento's, what do you want?

Thomas: I'm looking for an antique lamp sticking out of a clown's ass.

*Edward nudges Thomas slighty.*

Thomas: I mean... What do you have in stock?

Trento: No cherry today, we've sold out. If that's what you here for, then you've wasted your time.

Percy: Believe me, we didn't sail halfway across the world for cherry pie.

Morgana: No. 6, we've only been across the channel and back. Why'd you think we'd go around the world?

Percy: Eh, sometimes you just have to get away from it all.

Trento: Hey, you wouldn't be the first, little engine. It is my number one seller, after all. But look,

your crew wandered in here at nearly closing time, and that means

we're sold out of apple, peach, strawberry, banoffee and blueberry too.

Thomas: *facepalms* Oh my God... do you have at least ANYTHING left?!

Trento: I got some sweet potato. Buy a slice or don't - I'm a busy man, well... what's it gonna be?

Darious: Actually... my interests lie in something else entirely.

Trento: You mean like... cake?

Darious: Not exactly. Have you seen this coin before? *holds up a coin in front of Trento.*

Trento: I... um... no. Never seen that thing before in my life.

Tam-Tam: Is that so? Come now, darling. You might be a wizard in the kitchen but your poker face isn't quite up to snuff.

Edward: Tam-Tam, please... we're in a public area.

Trento: Okay, okay. Maybe I've seen it, maybe I didn't. But it's NOT stolen, you hear?

Thomas: Oh, we hear alright.

Trento: Okay, I had a very reputable dealer. You understand?

Thomas: Mm-hm.

Darious: Hey, we're not accusing you of stealing it.

Thomas: Step aside, Darious. I know how to handle this.

Trento: Then why have you come in here, busting my chops over this?

Thomas: Because, esteemed Trento, It's on the map and the pirates need that coin.

Trento: You need it? YOU REALLY NEED IT?!

Thomas: Yes, and...

Trento: *scoffs* That's rich. Ever thought about how I might need it, pal?

Thomas: What, precisely, do you need it for?

Trento: I... uh... Look, it's kind of a lucky charm for me. You understand?

Thomas: We most certainly do not. A lucky charm, indeed. You're seriously entertaining such superstitions.

Trento: Hey! Luck might not mean much to an educated guy like you. But I was on the verge of closing up shop before it came along. Now I seel so many pies, I can barely

keep up! Sorry, pal. But the coin is not for sale, Period.

Mila: Look, we can both negotiate a profit here. Do you REALLY want to spend your whole life baking?

We could trade you some very treasures for that coin? Items so valuable

you'll never have to work another day in your life.

Thomas: *whispers* Mila! What're you doing? You're gonna do Scene 6 all over again!

Mila: *whispers* Trust me, Thomas! I've got this.

Trento: Rare treasures, you say? You got 'em with you?

Mila: Eh... not exactly...

Thomas: We're currently in the process of trying to recover...

Trento: Oh, blah blah blah! In other words, you don't got it. No deal. Now if you don't mind,

get the hell out of my shop.

Darious: You've made your point; we're leaving.

Thomas: Oh no, I'm not leaving this shop empty-handed unless you give me the coin.

Trento: I told you, I don't got no coin. Now get out before I make you leave.

Thomas: *scoffs* What're you gonna do about it?

*Scene cuts to Thomas and Mila being thrown out the shop.*

Trento: AND DON'T COME BACK!

*Trento slams the shop door, and locks it.*

Thomas: Well, that went pear shaped fast.

Mila: Tell me about it.

*Thomas and Mila meet the others outside the ship.*

Darious: Well, on the upside. We've at least confirmed we're looking in the right place.

Tam-Tam: I'm sure, given a little more time. I'll make him an offer he can't refuse.

James: *chuckles* Movie references are fun!

Morgana: We're not going to wait around for you to slither your way into his pants.

Duck: Ewww... Tam-Tam would do that?

Tam-Tam: You certainly have a one track mind.

Morgana: If he's not going to give it up peacefully, why don't we just barge right in there and take it!

Gordon: Sounds good to me.

*Gordon steams back to the shop but Edward grabs him by his front buffer.*

Edward: Now HOLD ON A MINUTE, Gordon. We're NOT resorting to that!

Gordon: Aww... this movie hasn't had enough action in it. I'm getting BORED!

Darious: Morgana, we don't even know if he's got it with him.

Thomas: We could try talking it out with him.

Mila: How would you do that?

Thomas: Why, me and the Steam Team are the most sweet talking engines you'd ever meet.

Trento would never stand a chance between himself and 21 engines. So either way... *singing* where did you go?!

Thomas: *singing* I was searchin' (Engines: *singing* searchin') on a harbour branch

I was hopin' (Engines: *singing* hopin') for a chance to meet

I was waitin' for the operator on the line

Engines: *singing* She's gone so long

Thomas: *singing* What can I do? (Engines: *singing* Where could she be?)

No, no, no!

Don't know what I'm gonna do

I gotta get back to you!

Thomas feat. Bertha, Rebecca, Gordon, Oliver and Toby: *singing and dancing in a similar fashion to Mannrobics.* You gotta slow down, (Engines: *singing* slow down), sweet talkin' engines, (Engines: slow down)

You've got me runnin', (Engines: run run), you've got me searchin'

Hold on, (Engines: hold on), sweet talkin' engines (Engines: hold on)

It's so sad if that's the way it's over.

Thomas: *singing* I was steamin' (Engines: *singing* steamin'), many days go by

I was thinkin' (Engines: *singing* thinkin') 'bout the lonely nights

Communication breakdown all around.

Engines: *singing* She's gone so long

Thomas: *singing* What can I do? (Engines: *singing* Where could she be?)

No, no, no!

Don't know what I'm gonna do

I gotta get back to you!

Thomas feat. Chloe, Jade, Duck, Abigail and Nia: *singing, dancing and jumping in a sort of conga line.* You gotta slow down, (Engines: *singing* slow down), sweet talkin' engines, (Engines: slow down)

You've got me runnin', (Engines: run run), you've got me searchin'

Hold on, (Engines: hold on), sweet talkin' engines (Engines: hold on)

It's so sad if that's the way it's over.

Thomas feat. Percy and Toby: *singing* I've been livin' (Engines: livin') on a top station

I've been askin' (Engines: askin' kindly) everybody I meet

Insufficient data coming through.

Engines: *singing* She's gone so long

Thomas: *singing* What can I do? (Engines: *singing* Where could she be?)

No, no, no!

Don't know what I'm gonna do

I gotta get back to you!

Thomas feat. Emily, Donald, Douglas, James and Henry: *singing* You gotta slow down, (Engines: *singing* slow down), sweet talkin' engines, (Engines: slow down)

You've got me runnin', (Engines: run run), you've got me searchin'

Hold on, (Engines: hold on), sweet talkin' engines (Engines: hold on)

It's so sad if that's the way it's over.

*Thomas steams up to Mila.*

Thomas: So, what'd ya say?

Mila: Alright, Thomas!

Thomas and Mila feat Steam Team: *singing and dancing in a similar fashion to Mannrobics.* You gotta slow down, (Engines: *singing* slow down), sweet talkin' engines, (Engines: slow down)

You've got me runnin', (Engines: run run), you've got me searchin'

Hold on, (Engines: hold on), sweet talkin' engines (Engines: hold on)

It's so sad if that's the way it's over.

Steam Team and Dread Pirates: *singing* Slow down, (Engines: *singing* slow down), sweet talkin' engines, (Engines: slow down)

You've got me runnin', (Engines: run run), you've got me searchin' (Thomas: Mila!)

Mila: *singing and dancing* Hold on, (Engines: hold on), sweet talkin' engines (Engines: hold on)

Steam Team and Dread Pirates: *singing* It's so sad if that's the way it's over.

*singing, dancing and jumping in a sort of conga line.* Slow down, (Engines: *singing* slow down), sweet talkin' engines, (Engines: slow down)

You've got me runnin', (Engines: run run), you've got me searchin'

Hold on, (Engines: hold on), sweet talkin' engines (Engines: hold on)

It's so sad if that's the way it's over.

Thomas: So, what'd ya think?

Darious: Interesting idea, Thomas. But I don't think your fine talking is going to convince Trento to give you the coin.

Thomas: Oh, right. But what CAN we do and WHO can help us?

Voice: I might be able to help with that.

*Just then, a black cat with purple stripes, also dressed in 17th centuary clothing walks over.*

Percy: Who the hell are you?

Oliver: We don't care who she is. This is a private conversation.

Black Cat: Where are my manners - allow me to introduce myself. I'm Kate, baker extraordinaire, and I'm certain I'll be able to help you find what you're lookin' for inside that pie shop.

Thomas: You will?

Tam-Tam: That so...? And what do you want in return?

Kate: What? Oh no, you misunderstood...

Tam-Tam: Come now, you look like a clever girl. Would anyone help out a stranger, when they had nothing to gain?

Henry: Tam-Tam, trust me, it happens. Just not every day.

Kate: Alright, alright. You've made your point. Perhaps it's best if I tell you everythin' about the shop. It's high time the truth was known about that place. But it's not safe to talk about it in the open.

Darious: Well, then. Let's head aboard my ship, Kate. Leeko, Holly, Chloe and the rest of you remain here.

Leeko: Aww... why me? I wanted to...

Darious: We need someone to run reconnaissance on Trento. If he leaves the shop, let us know where he goes.

Thomas: "Reconnaissance" again... oh brother...

*Scene changes to Darious, Morgana, Tam-Tam, Mila, Thomas, Percy and Oliver on the ship's deck talking to Kate.*

Thomas: Okay... so let me get this straight. What's this "story" on this pie shop?

Kate: Let me start from the beginnin', I've dreamt of workin' as a baker since I was a little girl.

Morgana: Hey, you don't need to go back that far.

Kate: Growin' up, we didn't have much to eat...

Oliver: Oh, yeah. I'm sure of that...

Kate: Those were tough times indeed...

Morgana: What No. 11's trying to say is that you certainly look like you get plenty to eat these days.

*Thomas is shocked to hear this and gapes crossly at Oliver.*

Thomas: You disrespectful little brute!

*Thomas smacks Oliver on the back of his smokebox.*

Oliver: Oi!

Kate: I'll get to that later... As I was sayin', When I was hired to work in the pie shop, Trento wouldn't ever give me a chance in the kitchen. Just sweepin' and cleanin', that's

all he ever used me for.

Percy: But what makes you think you'd cut it as a chef? Did you actually have any training?

Kate: Hey, you sound just like him!

Percy: Sorry, sorry... slip of the tongue... slip of the tongue.

Darious: Alright, let her speak, Percy.

Kate: I wanted so badly to help in the kitchen. I'd done my share of bakin' at home... but as your sufferable subordinate suggested, I lacked formal trainin'.

So I decided to stay inside the shop, after tellin' him I'd gone home for the day.

Thomas: To spy on your employer?

Kate: I see how it is around here. When I look in on him, I'm a spy, but when you do it. It's "reconnaissance".

Oliver: Whoa... she's got a sharp tongue...

Darious: Fair point, Kate. My apologies.

Thomas: Why not just ask Trento to teach you how to bake? Everything will take care of itself.

Kate: Oh, believe me, No. 1. I tried. But shortly after I came on board. Trento developed some kind of secret technique. One which caused his popularity to greatly expand... along with other things...

Tam-Tam: What other things would that be?

Kate: Have paitence, please, snakey-girl. Trust me, just let me continue with my story.

Oliver: Never thought I'd say this, but I'd give anything to switch places with any of the other engines not seen here right now.

Kate: Anyway, I had to know Trento's secret. Had I been given half of the chance, I know my passion for good food would've brightened the smile of the world, Or... at least the most important people in it. So given the circumstances,

I had no choice but to look in on him, and that's when I saw what his secret was - that coin. It explained everythin'!

Mila: Everything?

Kate: Why he didn't want to share his recipes. Why the pies were suddenly extremely, addictively delicious. Tasty enough for people to ignore the side effects.

Percy and Oliver: *gulps* Side effects?

Kate: You see, unbeknownst to the public, Trento's pies cause... weight gain.

*Thomas, Percy, Oliver and Mila gasp and stare in shock and horror.*

Morgana: Oh, please. Everyone knows eating pies makes you fat, you moron.

Kate: But... but... alright, doubt me if you want to. But that man doesn't care about the welfare of his customers, his employees, anybody. A man like that shouldn't have access to a magic coin.

Darious: And the coin's in his shop?

Kate: He keeps it inside the oven, you've got to take it from him.

Darious: Thank you, Kate.

*Just then, Duck steams onto the ship, with Leeko on his running board.*

Leeko: Trento's left the shop.

Darious: Perfect timing. Kate's just informed us of the coin's location - it's inside. Mila, Morgana, Thomas, Percy, let's head back there. Tam-Tam, Oliver, Leeko, Duck, stay here with Kate. Keep her until we return.

Kate: Wait, what?

Darious: Since you have a history with Trento, we don't want you to be involved in recovering his coin. It's for your own safety, Kate.

Leeko: Look on the bright side. Maybe the two of us can get better acquainted? Tell me a little more about yourself.

Kate: Let me start from the beginnin', I've dreamt of workin' as a baker since I was a little girl...

*Whilst Kate is talking to Leeko, the others make a run for the pie shop. Duck calls out to Thomas.*

Duck: Thomas, why can't me and Oliver come and retrieve the coin too?

Thomas: Because Duck... You're Great Western... and Great Westerners don't burn their fair skin on hot surfaces.

Duck: Oh... I suppose you're right.

*Thomas, Percy James and Gordon, along with Mila, Morgana and Darious make their way towards the pie shop. They haven't gone very far when Thomas stops because he remembered something.*

Mila: Darious?

Darious: Yes, Mila?

Mila: Did you really ask Leeko, Tam-Tam, Duck and Oliver to keep Kate aboard the ship just to protect her from Trento?

Morgana: Of course not, Mila. Use your head.

James: I did that once, got a severe scar on the back of my brain for doing so.

Darious: Hmmm... that was one reason, yes. Tell me, Thomas; could you think of another?

Thomas: Erm.... Maybe getting the coin itself could be dangerous? I don't know...

Darious: Yes, Agreed. But it's not a danger that can be appreciated by just anyone. You see Mila, when you first wore that coin around your neck, you didn't have

any idea what it was capable of, did you?

Mila: Ummm... no?

Darious: ...and Thomas, you didn't have any idea on what your builder's plate was capable of, didn't you?

Thomas: Well, obviously no. Because it's a builder's plate. Nothing special.

Darious: Yes, I established that. But there's also another reason. You see, once we...

Gordon: Let's just break inside and be done with it. The coin isn't going to steal itself.

Darious: I admire your enthusiasm, Gordon. But recovering the coin that way is just one option. There is another; we could bring Trento on board.

James: Then, I could blow his brains out, steal his keys, break into his shop and THEN get the coin.

Thomas: James... you're not.

James: Damn, I thought it was a good idea. And another thing, invite THAT grease ball onto our ship? With Kate on board, too? Aren't you worried about the ship sinking?

Thomas: James, we're riding the ship too. Trento and Kate aren't just the heavy ones...

James: Oh, you sad sick son-of-a-b***h...

Darious: Yes, very funny, Thomas and James. But there's no way to be certain Kate was telling us the truth about where the coin was, and I'm sure you'll agree that the rest of her story sounded dubious and vainglorious.

Percy: The wha-?

Henry: I don't think she was the sharpest scone in the box, if that's what you're getting at.

Darious: If we bring Trento on board and show him Kate, we can explain to him that we have foiled a robbery.

Thomas: I don't see how THAT's going to work, Darious.

Mila: Foiled a robbery... what do you mean?

Percy: Hang on, HANG ON... Darious, you REALLY want us to hand over someone who wanted to help US?

Darious: It might appear to be harsh, Percy, I know. However, she was the one who spied on her boss, then suggested to us that we steal from him.

Gordon: But why should we cover for her just because her interests happen to align with her own?

Mila: Gordon's got a good point.

Gordon: Because... because... er...

James: Because Kate might be a fatass, but why trick her when we can just honestly steal the coin?

Gordon: Thanks, James.

Darious: "Honestly" steal it? I almost admire your cognitive dissonance there, James.

James: Thanks.

Morgana: I don't... *sighs* No. 5 has really got me there.

Darious: Perhaps another perspective. Thomas, Mila, which plan do you think is best?

*Thomas and Mila look at each other in concern for they have no idea what to go with, Thomas eventually turns to Gordon.*

Thomas: Errm... Gordon? What was your plan again?

*Scene cuts to Gordon racing along the streets of Ilfracombe in order to put his plan to action.*

Gordon: Burglary coming THROUGH!!!

*Gordon races towards Trento's shop and crashes into it. Debris flies everywhere, but Gordon doesn't care.*

Gordon: And THAT'S how you break into a pie shop!

*Thomas, James, Percy, Mila, Morgana and Darious arrive on the scene.*

Darious: I wasn't expecting something like this but... okay.

Percy: Right, now what?

Morgana: And... we're in!

James: Kate said the coin was in the oven.

*Morgana opens the oven to find the coin.*

Morgana: I don't see anything in the oven except these pies. Maybe... it's inside one of them? Would make for a good hiding place.

Thomas: Now WHAT makes you think Trento would hide the coin inside a pie? It could end up in someone's bowels, you know.

Morgana: Don't judge me, No. 1. I know what I'm doing. *sniffs the pies.* God, these do smell fantastic. Maybe I'll just have one bite.

Percy: Erm... Morgana, are you sure...?

Morgana: *scoffs* What's one little bite going to do, No. 6? You think I'm going to end up like Kate or No. 4 or something?

Gordon: Hey!

Morgana: Yeah, right. Fat chance!

*Morgana takes one small bite.*

Morgana: Oh, wow, this is... *eats the pie* this is... *eats another pie*

Thomas: Erm... Morgana... I don't think...

Morgana: This is amazing, I've got to have more. *eats yet another pie*

Thomas: But, Morgana... you'll... you'll...

Morgana: *groans* I never felt so full, but I can't stop now... *eats more pies*

James: ... Morgana, what are you doing?

*Morgana keeps eating the pies. But whilst she's doing so, she's suddenly gaining lots of weight. Percy steams over towards her.*

Percy: Morgana... you're...

Morgana: Leave me alone, No. 6. I'm starving! *eats even more pies.*

Percy: But... BUT...

Mila: Morgana, the coin must have you under its spell!

Thomas: By jove, she's right!

Morgana: Shut up! I'm eating! *eats more pies.* Just... one... more...

*Morgana is just about to eat one last pie before Thomas covers her mouth to stop from eating.*

Thomas: Oh no, you don't! *struggles to restrain Morgana.* You... had... too... much.

*Suddenly, Morgana lets out a long burp and eventually burps out the coin hidden in the pie. She catches it in her hand.*

Morgana: I've found the coin!

James: Morgana, look at yourself. You look like The Fat Controller (Sir Topham Hatt) during his hangover.

Morgana: So...? *looks down at her body, for she has gained so much weight from eating all the pies.* Oh my God... what's happened to me? I... I...

Thomas: Filled up on pies at the worse possible time?

Voice: Indeed she has!

*Just then, Trento arrives on the scene.*

Trento: After what happened today, I thought you lot might try something like this, so I laid a little trap for you.

All that's left is for the city guards to take you to the dungeon.

Thomas: Yes, but it still doesn't explain why Gordon crashed into your shop in the first place.

Trento: And I thought I told you to get the hell out!

Thomas: Oh, you're right. Why didn't I think of that? Guys... charge! Let's run for it!

Morgana: No. 4, take me back to the ship.

Gordon: But, Morgana, you're...

*But what Gordon said was no use, Morgana climbs in his cab and tender. Her weight is almost causing Gordon to tip over.*

Gordon: *groans* ...too... ...heavy!

Thomas: No time to argue! GO, GO, GO!

*As the engines make a run for it. James aims his gun at Trento.*

James: Say one more word about Gordon and Morgana and you're dead.

Trento: Hey, I...

*James shoots Trento in the head, the former not seen.*

Percy: *calls out as he races away.* James, quit shooting people and get back to the ship.

*Before James does so, he gives the gun to a passing steam roller.*

James: You take care, sonny.

*James races away as fast as he could. The police arrive and aim their guns at the steam roller.*

Police: This is the police, we have you surrounded.

*Meanwhile, the engines and the Dread Pirates make it back to the ship, just in time. Eventually, Gordon follows behind, exhausted from carrying all of Morgana's weight.*

Gordon: *pants* I may have carried lots of heavy loads before but not THIS heavy!

Morgana: Hey, shut up!

Thomas: *pants* Well done, guys! We made it!

*Tam-Tam and Duck walk over to Thomas.*

Tam-Tam: Oh wow, I sense a hilarious story incoming.

Thomas: No time for that, Tam-Tam. Raise the anchor, now!

*Tam-Tam races off the raise the anchor, Kate walks over to the others.*

Kate: So, it happened to you too, Morgana? I tried to warn ya... the pies make ya fat.

Morgana: You didn't explain that clearly at all, did ya?

Kate: No...

Edward: It must be because of the coin. They enchant the pies to become more delicious, but the pursuit of gluttony causes consequences...

Mila: "Become what you seek", right?

Thomas: No, not this time. It's now "Brighton Locomotive Works No. 110 of 1915". We're changing it.

Morgana: Gluttony, those pies were the tastiest thing I'd ever eaten... what was I supposed to do?

Percy: I don't know... explode like a balloon?

Morgana: Yeah... right. Besides, if these coins were created to help the world,

why wouldn't they make delicious healthy food?

Edward: I don't know. Perhaps Trento never even attempted to do so.

James: Oh c**p! City guards, at the harbour!!

Darious: We've got to set sail, immediately.

Kate: What? We're leavin'? Please! Take me with you.

Morgana: You... want to join us? Please don't make us laugh!

Kate: I'll be arrested as an accomplice if I stay behind. The laws are not kind to thieves here.

There must be somethin' I can do for ya. Does your crew need a chef?

Morgana: After what just happened to me, I'd like to fast for a month, thank you very much.

James: Besides, we already have more liars and losers than we can handle.

Gordon: We don't have room for a shifty baker who spied on her own boss.

Edward: Alright, that's enough you three. Please excuse Morgana. She's reeling from the shock of what's happened to her.

Morgana: I most certainly am not, No. 2.

Darious: A chef sounds lovely, Kate. Welcome aboard. Leeko, Oliver, why don't you give her the tour?

Oliver: Really? Us? I mean... we'd love to!

Leeko: Indeed, right this way, Kate!

*The ship sets sail just as the guards arrive at the harbour. Meanwhile, Morgana is talking to Thomas, Mila, Darious, James, Edward and Percy.*

Morgana: You're letting that slime ball join our crew?

A few hours ago, you were going to have her thrown in jail.

James: Darious, is there ANYONE you won't let on board?

Darious: If she doesn't fit in, we can always drop her off at our next stop. But, you never know, Morgana and James. She might surprise us all.

Morgana: How, by poisoning our food?

Edward: Oh, she won't be poisoning anyone's foods. I'LL be the one teaching her. I have cooked for my engine friends in the past.

Percy: Edward's right, you know. He makes the BEST cookies any engine could ever make.

Thomas: You know, Morgana. You certainly changed a lot from who you where when Mila first invited me and the others on board. Do you think the person you are today would approve of inviting the old you on board, hmmmm?

Morgana: Of course not, it was a huge risk.

Thomas: Yes, of course it was. But aren't you glad we did so anyways?

Morgana: That doesn't make me feel any better about having someone like that on board.

Mila: Oh come on, Morgana. Kate isn't so bad, is she?

Morgana: I suppose it could be worse; we could be having Trento on board. After what he did to me. I'd really like to slit his throat.

James: I don't think he will join...

*Morgana looks at James, not knowing what he exactly meant by "don't".*

Darious: Anyway, I'm glad you approve, Morgana.

Morgana: Hey, I didn't say... er... whatever, Darious. I got stuff to do.

*Morgana storms off to sweep the decks, Darious turns to Thomas and Mila.*

Darious: So tell me, you two. Do you approve of how things turned out?

Thomas: Erm... two wrongs don't make a right.

Mila: I agree with Thomas. I think the lesson is clear. Ever since we got here, we've seen that same pattern over and over again.

Darious: We have?

Thomas: Kate spied on her boss and got fired. Then she tried to enlist us to steal for her and got trapped with us on the ship. Trento used shady business practices AND got his shop broken into.

Mila: And we stole from Trento, James shot his brains out and NOW we nearly got arrested. Not to mention what happened to Morgana.

Darious: Yes, but no matter how we choose to handle it, Mila and Thomas, hunting for the coins is dangerous work, you know. Virtuousness,

while an admireable aspiration, can't protect ourselves from those dangers we encounter. Just remember that, you two.

Thomas and Mila: Ay-ay, cap'n!

*Thomas and Mila get back to work whilst the sun sets on the horizon.*

Narrator: Thomas and his Friends knew they would find the coins and get home soon enough. But would they succeed? Well, I'm sorry to say, but that's another story...

TO BE CONTINUED...