The Easter Virus, Chapter 3
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The Easter Virus
Chapter 3
By William W. Kelso
I twitched my ear, nose buried in a soft pillow, but the light tickly touch came again and I heard a giggle.
"Zoe! Knock it off, I said, I don't have to work today!!"
"But you do have to get up and go looking at cars with John, and you're late, you're late, for a very important date!"
I sat up and chucked the pillow at Zoe, who ducked into the bathroom with a squeal of mock outrage. "I help you out, and you assault me!! You brute!"
"THAT was for the Alice in Wonderland reference! I laughed, and, literally, hopped out of bed. I'd never been much of a morning person; or hare, and loved to sleep in. But Zoe was right; she always was, I'd promised to help John look for a car for us as while one of the company vans might be good enough for a married couple, for two mated couples we needed another set of wheels.
She was hogging the bathroom; as usual and mock growled as I tried to reach around her and get into the medicine cabinet, and she kept slamming it. "I was here first!" She said. "Yeah, but I'm bigger!" I replied, and it was on! Our regular morning ritual of 'who's dominate' as far as the sink was concerned. And, predictably, she won. But by groveling and whimpering I got her to let me brush my teeth real fast, which was about the extent of my morning toiletries anyway. I'd groom myself later.
"Wait a second!" She said, and when I faced her she took my muzzle in her hands and gave me a long slow nibble on my nose, her pink tongue licking into my mouth. We were both still naked; we sleep that way, and I ran my hand over her small breasts, all eight of them, and said,
"Mmm, what was that for?"
"Just making sure your breath is nice and minty", she replied.
"Is it?" I said.
"Hmmm, better let me check again just to make sure." She said, and we nuzzled and kissed again for a long time. Unfortunately a loud honk from the driveway interrupted what was starting to turn into a serious mating event. She wasn't in estrus, but we didn't need that stimulation any more, in that way hares were still like humans, we enjoy sex very much. Indeed we do.
"Jeez, I said, when does he get up? We haven't even had breakfast yet!"
"WE'VE been up for two hours, Mr. Lazy Bum, Zoe said, but you'd better go before he leaves without you."
I nipped her nose, and said, "I'd rather stay here with you."
"GIT, she giggled, we can do that later!"
"Promise?" I said.
"GIT!" was the only answer, and I got. Brother John was not one for patience.
He leaned on the horn again just as I exited the apartment, and gave me one of his 'why do I bother' looks.
"Give the horn a rest, I said, you're making me deaf, and you'll wake up the neighbors! And no place is open yet anyway!"
"We're going to that car lot I told you about first, and he opens at seven, John replied. Hey, where are you going?!"
"To the kitchen, I'm hungry!" I replied.
"No way, John said, get in already. I have some carrots and a sandwich for you anyway, Tina made me take them, I have no idea why."
"Well, bless her heart." I said as I hopped into the passenger side. I grabbed a nice big carrot and started munching loudly. That's one stereotype about hares and rabbits that IS true, we love carrots.
"Well, next time I'll stick an onion in your sandwich when she's not looking", John threatened.
"You wouldn't!" I replied. I hate onions, so I took a quick look in the sandwich I already had, just to make sure. "You do that and I'll stick it up your nose!"
"You and what army?" John chuckled.
"The Salvation Army, I replied, I have connections!"
"Well, just see what happens next time you make me wait!" John chuckled.
I didn't bother to dignify that with a reply, and just kept munching on my veggie sandwich and the fresh crisp carrots. Finishing them off in record time I settled back in the seat with a happy, 'erp, scuse me', and looked around. We were heading cross town to where most of the used car lots were located. "So, tell me about this place again, you said a hare owns it?"
"Yep, John replied, only lot in town one of us owns. He kind of caters to his fellow hares, even has the pedals modified for our paws if you want him too. They're trying to pass a law to make that mandatory anyway. They say it's dangerous for us to drive using regular pedals because of the size of our paws, and I agree. He'd a little...squirrelly, so be a little careful with what you say."
"Squirrelly, I said, I thought you said he was a hare?"
"Oh, ha ha, John said. No, really though, they don't call him 'Crazy Freddie' for no reason. He caught the virus, but his wife and kids didn't. She got a divorce and the house and kids, so he lives in a room at the car lot. He kind of took it hard, so he's not quite right sometimes. But he'll give us a good deal if he has anything we want."
"Tell me about it, I said, I think we all took it pretty hard." And John just nodded. When I'd found out I was basically turning into an animal I know sure as Hell took it hard, it's a pretty big 'life change', and some of us never got over it. But most of us adjusted and kept on with our lives, that is if 'humans' would leave us alone. Lately there had been some rather disturbing developments, and we couldn't believe some of the crazy laws and other stuff that were being proposed by local governments all the way up to Congress. It was pretty scary. There was talk of giving us 'special citizenship' status, which meant basically we wouldn't be allowed to join the military, be cops or firemen, run for public office, etc.
It wasn't hard to spot the lot; the sign had a big rabbit on it; throwing wads of cash and lettuce into the air as it hopped in apparent glee, and said 'Freddie's Used Cars, Where We Give You One Hare of a Deal!'. I thought it was embarrassing, and looked at John and made gagging sounds as I pointed at the sign.
"Told you so." He said, as we pulled in and parked.
While John headed for the little office building I started looking around, and was pretty disappointed. Most of the cars were older models, but at least they looked like they were in pretty good shape. I stuck my head in the open window of a Buick, and was looking around, when another hare suddenly stuck his head in the other window, and said,
"HI THERE! I'm Crazy Freddie, what can I do you for buddy?"
"WHAM!" I hit my head on the door frame as I squealed and pulled my head back in startled surprise. "OWWW!" I squeaked, ears laid back as I felt for a bump.
"Sorry about that, the other hare said, now what can I fix you up in? I've got cars, trucks, and anything with wheels! Even got a golf cart!"
"Oh good, John said from behind me, making me hop in surprise, I see you're met Freddie."
I watched as Freddie started walking slowly down the line of cars in that weird kind of up-down-almost-waddling gait we have, telling us what great deals they all were. He was a small grey hare with a white bib and neck ruff, and he was wearing a pair of shorts that looked like lederhosen with suspenders and great big buttons on the front.
"Yeah, I guess you could say that", I said as I rubbed my head. Then I stuck out my tongue and made loopy circles around my head while John made 'knock that off!' faces and flicked his ears at me in irritation.
"He's dressed like Peter Cottontail!" I said under my breath as we followed.
"hutsa heta uckfa upsa!" John said.
"What??" I said, but I did 'shut the fuck up' when he kicked me, hard.
We suddenly realized that Freddie had witnessed part of our little altercation; at least the part where John kicked me and I was hopping up and down holding one leg, and we both froze with big smiles on our muzzles.
"Oooo-K, Freddie said, so what are you two young bucks looking for, exactly?"
"He's looking, John said, I'm just here to provide moral support, and keep him from getting into trouble."
And make sure I don't get screwed, I thought. "Well, er, Mr. Freddie, I'm looking a good economical car, one that will be dependable.
"Isn't everyone? Freddie replied, and it's Freddie, not Mister. Well, I have a good selection as you can see. That Buick you were looking at is a good one, and I have some nice pickups or vans too. Got any particular makes, or models, in mind? What year?"
"Condition is more important than year or model, I said, it's just got to be a good dependable one. I'd prefer a four door sedan, but might consider a van since they usually have more ear room. And I like Dodges and Buicks." That was one problem with coupes and sedans, with our long ears they can be a pain to drive. We use our ears; a lot, and having to drive with them tucked back is really uncomfortable. And I hate sunroofs, got my ears stuck in one once. And it was NOT funny!
"Well, I have a couple of Dodge minivans, Freddie said, they're older models, but the owners took good care of them. The blue one has more mileage then the white one, but is in better condition, at least cosmetically. But they both have good drive trains and everything works. The blue has a V-8, the white one a V-6, so the white might be a little better on mileage."
I took a closer look at the blue van, and it was in good condition, and I didn't see any body damage or rust. We looked at some others, but always ended up coming back to the blue van. I finally took it for a drive, and despite being a standard I didn't have any trouble with it. It sounded good, and had lots of get up and go. I could tell as I stuck my head under it; and popped the hood, that it had been taken care of. It also had almost new tires. The interior was a little basic without a lot of the bells & whistles and other useless gimmicks, which to me was a plus. Less to go wrong. No TV's or wet bars, and the storage area was huge. Plus, best of all, tons of ear room!
"Well, whadaya think?" Freddie asks when I got back from the test drive.
"I like it, I said, but no there's way I can pay the sticker price."
"Come in to my office, and we'll talk." Freddie said.
I could tell he loved to haggle, and over mugs of some sort of herb tea we hassled out the details, and I was soon the proud owner of a slightly used Dodge minivan, and had even spent less then I'd planned; plus he gave me a break because I paid cash up front, so no financing paperwork hassle. It was hard to get a loan approved if you were a hare anyway, no matter how good a job you had or what your 'human' credit history had been. Another thing I liked was he gave me a big stack of maintenance and repair records the previous owner had kept, and it had the receipts for everything that had been done to the van since it was new. And I mean everything, even oil change and tune-up receipts. And it had also had the pedals modified already; he had a pair of hare mechanics named Eenie and Meenie do it (I'm not kidding, that's what they call themselves), and they give him a special deal since he brings them so much business. The new pedals were a lot larger and shaped to fit our large hind paws. The problem with the old 'human' pedals was we tend to stomp on more than one at the same time, which is NOT good. I think I got a really good deal too, partially because it was a standard and he said they were hard to move. I was quite pleased with my new wheels, and followed John back to the house. As we drove back I found a station playing oldies, and as we pulled up in the drive 'War' was playing 'Low Rider', and I was bobbing up and down like a living bobble-head.
As I got out of the van, John said, "What's wrong with you, you were bouncing up and down the last mile."
"Listening to 'Low Rider'." I replied.
"Oh, John said, I thought you had to pee or something."
About that time Tina and Zoe came out of the house; they'd heard us pull up, and Zoe squealed when she saw the van. "I love blue!" She said, and got in the van and crawled around inside it for awhile. "It's nice." Tina said. As Zoe got back out, I asked,
"Well?"
"Oh, I love it, she said, its perfect!"
I preened a little bit, and said, "It IS nice, isn't it?"
"We'll have to go for a ride later, Zoe said, let's go to The Patch for dinner!"
"Sounds good to me, I said, you and Tina want to go too, John?"
"Hmphh, try and stop us!" John said.
"And we have to invite some of our other friends from the hostel, they never get to go out much, and Fluff probably needs a ride to work anyway." Zoe declared in a 'don't you dare argue' tone of voice.
"Don't you have to work tonight too?" I asked Zoe.
"Nope, it's my night off, she replied, and I'm looking forward to getting waited on for a change! I'll complain about the silverware being dirty just to be mean!"
"Then it's a plan, let's leave at about 5:30 so we can beat the crowd and get good seats." I said. I had no problem with giving Fluff a ride, and the others, the more the merrier.
"Great, John replied, let's go in and get some lunch for now, I'm starving."
Zoe nibbled at my ear as we followed my brother and Tina, and I caught bits of their conversation. 'You're always starving!' 'Am not!' 'Oh, right, says Mr. Pot Belly!'
Fluff hung up the phone, and gave an excited little squeal, causing her roommate to look at her questioningly.
"YOU; and the others, Fluff said dramatically, are officially invited to The Patch for dinner, and our limo will be arriving shortly!"
Fluff was excited; which was kind of normal for her anyway, as she ran around and invited her other friends, most of whom readily accepted the invitation. There weren't many places for hares to go that catered to their culinary needs, and 'The Patch' was one of the best, but it was a fair distance away, and walking; while not tiring, could be dangerous due to the less then safe neighborhood. The police did little to police the area that had come to be known as 'Hare Town', and human gangs and other lowlifes liked to cruise the area and try and catch a hare or two alone and give them a hard time. There was some talk of forming their own 'public safety' patrols, but the cops let them know any such activity would be considered vigilantism. So the offer of a ride to 'The Patch' was eagerly accepted. Plus there was safety in numbers.
When we pulled up in the front of the old Windsor Hotel; that was now more commonly known as the 'The Bunny Hostel', I saw Fluff waiting on the front steps. She turned and waved into the lobby, and my mouth fell open as a whole herd of hares came pouring through the door. Eight! I counted, Jeez, she invited the whole place! Made me glad I'd got a van! Otherwise we'd have had to stuff some in the trunk, and one in the glovebox!
Zoe hopped out to greet them; she and Zoe were best friends, and after the nose rubs and polite greeting ear nibbles, they crammed themselves into the van. It wasn't that bad though, most of us tend to be fairly slender, and we didn't mind being squeezed in next to one another at all. With twelve of us though it was a bit tight. To my surprise Fluff gave me a twenty, and said "We all chipped in to help with the gas."
"That everybody? I asked, OK then, Peter's Taxi service is on the roll!"
I think everybody was talking at the same time as we drove to 'The Patch', but they got quiet when we entered the parking lot and saw the boards over the main front window. It reminded us of how often the place got vandalized. It was so bad the owners had decided to just leave it up until things improved, if they ever did. But once we'd piled out of the van; it looked like a furry explosion as hares poured out of all the doors, and gone inside everybody was soon just as happy as before. Fluff headed for the kitchen, and the rest of us dispersed to various tables, after nose rubs and nibbles as we greeted other hares we knew. It might have made a human a little uneasy in how 'familiar' we were with each other, but we're very sociable critters and bodily contact is not frowned upon, at least by us. And if you don't like, there's the door, and who the hell invited you anyway?
I ended up at one of the round tables with John and Tina, Zoe, and two other does named Chloe and Sandy. John and I were quite pleased with being outnumbered by pretty females, and though mated we still like to look at; and sniff, other does, and they of course returned the pleasantries. And if one was interested in a 'quickie' our mates wouldn't mind that much. For that matter if they met a male they licked, that was OK too. We're a little less strict on sexual morals I'm afraid, most likely our 'bestial' natures, as some humans like to say. However, it's strictly for mutual pleasure, breeding is an entirely different thing. And we don't just run around doing it all the time, and it's more likely to happen at a place where a whole bunch of us get together for rest and relaxation. 'The Patch' has several rooms set aside for that purpose. And yes, we do on occasion end up having orgies, they just kind of start spontaneously.
Soon we were all pigging out on The Patch's famous veggie salad plates, drinking ice cold ginger fizzes, and Zoe and I were playing a game involving grapes, the one who caught the most in their mouth being declared the grand winner. You rolled the grapes down your muzzle and tried to catch them with your tongue when they rolled off your nose. When I started snapping my head back and throwing them up in the air and catching them that way there were cries of 'cheater!', and a serious discussion as to the 'official rules' commenced. Soon another half dozen hares joined us, and it became a serious competition; grapes flying everywhere. A young buck named Roberto won paws down when he started rolling grapes back and forth on his ears, before using one to flip the grape several feet in the air, and then catching it with his head tilted back till he was bent almost double. That act of dexterity got him a round of applause and squeals of admiration. After that 'grape juggling' became a regular pastime at 'The Patch'.
Fluff had paused in her waiting activities to watch the 'great grape-off', and gave a squeal of delight as Roberto performed his impressive feats of coordination and dexterity. Man is that buck hot, she thought! She'd have to 'make his acquantence' a little more personally later, time permitting. She thought his mainly black fur; with a lovely white ruff, would go well with her own brilliant white pelt. As she made her way back through the crowd of happy partying hares she carried the large tray covered with plates and glasses over her head with the ease of years of practice. She had only once; just once, ever dropped a tray; and that was because she'd been run into from behind by a couple of over eager hares heading for the private rooms.
As she returned from the kitchen with another large platter piled high with platters and bowls of fruits and veggies she noticed a new arrival, a rather small plain brown hare that had found a small table in a corner, and was sitting alone. That in itself was unusual as hares are extremely social animals, and he looked downright miserable. So, curious and a little concerned, she moved over to his table after she had served the food she was carrying.
"Hi, Fluff said, what can I get you?"
The little hare actually jumped a little when she talked to him, and looked at her with big nervous eyes. "Um, I...do you have a-a menu?"
"Sorry, we don't, Fluff said, everything is written on the blackboard, over there." And she pointed at the day's list of what was available.
"Oh, okay, he said, I guess I'll have a, er, glass of tea."
"Hot or cold?" Fluff asked.
"I..., hot, I guess." He said shyly, and she realized he was embarrassed, and was trying not to stare at her breasts, which were pretty large for a doe. Even her six smaller breasts; or teats, were larger than the average doe's. In public most doe's wore tops to keep from offending humans, but in The Patch most went topless, as did Fluff. But to hares topless females were no big deal; oh, the bucks liked it, but it just wasn't the same as with human females due to the fur. Plus with most doe's their breasts were very flat, and often little more than nipples, unless they were lactating. However, Fluff was definitely well endowed in the teats area, though the top pair were larger than the lower three pairs as was the norm.
"You're new here, aren't you? Fluff said, I don't think I've seen you at 'The Patch' before. You new in town?"
"Uh, yeah, I just came here a few days ago, afraid I don't know my way around. I was passing by, and saw some hares come in, so thought it might be OK. They won't let me in some places."
Fluff made a rude sound, "Oh yeah, I know, humans! Fooey! What's your name honey?'
"Um, Jeremy." He said quietly.
"Welcome to 'The Patch', I'm Fluff. Well, since you're a new customer the tea is on the house. Want anything to eat?"
The little buck seemed a little upset by the question, and finally said, "Do you have a small salad or something that's not very expensive? I'm a little, um, short on cash."
"Sorry about the prices, Fluff said, you wouldn't believe what the stuff costs nowadays, you'd think there was a famine or something. Tell you what, best deal for the money is the clover salad, it has lettuce, fresh clover, and shredded cabbage and radishes in it with a honey sauce. It's my favorite."
The little hare practically drooled, and said, "That sounds really good!"
"Right, Fluff said, one clover salad, coming up!"
As she reached the door to the kitchen she looked back at him, and realized just how skinny he was. Poor thing looks half starved, she thought, and added a free side order of carrot sticks and ranch dressing to the order, and made the salad extra large. No one left 'The Patch' hungry, so far as she was concerned.
When she set the plate of food down in front of him his eyes got even bigger, and almost ignoring her he started stuffing his muzzle as fast he could.
"Hey, hey! Fluff said, take it easy honey, you'll choke!"
He looked at her, and nodded his head, and slowed down a little bit. He ignored the silverware; which wasn't really that unusual, and just ate with apparent delight. That made Fluff happy; she enjoyed seeing a customer enjoy the food. When she said "I'll be back to check on you later, honey", he just nodded his head without looking up.
A short time later when she went back to refill his tea she was a little shocked to see he'd already finished, and was leaning back in his chair with a noticeable little bulge in his belly, a look of contented bliss on his muzzle, eyes closed, almost asleep. She took a closer look at the dozing buck, and frowned. He really was skinny, she could see his ribs, his fur was dry and unhealthy looking, and his shorts were homemade human ones poorly modified to fit him. Most hares had clothes made specifically for their body types now, so it was a little odd to see one still wearing 'hand-me-downs'. He looked downright pitiful. After thinking for a second, she went back to the kitchen and got a big piece of carrot cake and took it back to his table. As she sat it down he gave a little start at the sound, and snapped back awake, his ears swiveling frantically.
"I, er... what??"
Then his nose twitched, and he looked down and saw the treat, and looked at her questioningly.
"On the house for new customers", Fluff lied. His big grin as he dug into the treat was all the payment she needed. She watched him for a second, smiling, then went back to wait the other tables.
After awhile Fluff went back to bus his table; and he hesitantly asked her,
"Um, where is the, um, you know."
She smiled, and pointed, "Down that hall, in the back, can't miss it."
He shook his head in thanks, and as he moved through the crowd of hares she couldn't help notice he was shying every time he brushed against another hare; which was impossible to avoid doing in the packed main room, his ears flicking nervously, almost like he was scared. He must not get out much, she thought. Poor little guy. She left the check on his table, and took off of to get some drinks for the table with all of Zoe's friends.
When she came back to his table later there was a little pile of wadded up bills and change on the table, and he looked up at her with an appalled expression, and she realized he was almost in tears.
"I...I'm fifty seven cents short, he said, I thought I had enough, really! I can't even leave a tip, and you're been so nice...I'm sorry!"
"Hmphh, Fluff snorted, don't worry about it! I find more than that on the floor when I sweep up after we close. We'll just put it on your tab."
"Tab?" He asked.
"Oh yeah, Fluff said, all our regulars have tabs, if you're a little short sometimes you just make it up when you can, no big deal."
"I'd like to come again, he said, but don't know how often I can. I will pay you back though, I promise. Really."
With a smile Fluff leaned over to give him a nose rub, but to her surprise he pulled back, and said,
"W-What are you doing?!" His expression panicked.
"I-I'm sorry, Fluff replied, I was just trying to be friendly. I wasn't going to bite you."
The little buck got up, still obviously a little upset, and said, "Er, thanks for the great food, I'll pay you back as soon as I can. I...I have to go now."
Fluff watched as the small buck left, a frown on her muzzle. Then she went back to her duties, but found herself thinking about him. Something wasn't right.
I'd had a great time; and still was. Zoe had her head in my lap and had fallen asleep, her mouth open as she snored softly, except when she made little happy sounds as I stroked her ears. John and Tina were leaning against one another, half asleep, and Chloe and Sandy had migrated to other tables. Looking around I couldn't see Chloe, and figured she'd probably gone to one of the private rooms with that young buck she'd been nobbling with earlier. Lucky them, I thought. I stroked one of Zoe's ears again, and thought, but lucky us too. It was near closing time, but the 'rules' weren't strictly enforced. If some of us wanted to hang around for awhile; especially the 'in-crowd' that was fine. We'd all pitch in and help clean up too, which was welcome. Besides, we needed to give Fluff and her friends a ride back to the hostel. No way would we let them walk home late at night in this neighborhood. I looked up and smiled as Fluff plopped into a chair with a tired,
"Whew, what a night! Say, any of you know the little brown buck that was in the corner table earlier? Never seen him before, and he was downright pitiful."
"Nope", I said, and was echoed by everyone else who was still awake.
Fluff didn't reply, just flicked her ears a little bit, and drank some tea. It had been a very crowded night, but the tips had been good. The tips, and her regular pay, were more than enough to pay her share of the rent at the hostel, with some left over to put in the bank. She'd even taken a small pay cut; voluntarily, a few months ago when she found just how shoe-string the operating budget for 'The Patch' was, they made barely enough to stay in business. She'd never be rich, but she was pretty content overall. The company and good friends were more important than money anyway. Frankly, she didn't know what she'd do without 'The Patch', she loved the place. She'd learned to accept her 'new life' completely and without any lingering regrets, and had decided she liked what she was now. Most hares had, but some were still having a hard time. She especially felt sorry for those in communities where there were only a few of them, though she knew a lot of them had moved to areas with larger concentrations of hares. Safety in numbers, she guessed.
I woke up with a snort when I felt someone give my ear a gentle yank, and shaking my head to clear the cobwebs I found it was Fluff. When I moved Zoe woke up too, her little pink tongue licking out of her mouth as she gave a big yawn.
"Hey, I said, what was that all about!?"
Fluff giggled, and said, "Sorry, really hated to wake you up, the two of you looked really cute, except for your drooling all over Zoe while you snored."
"Oh gross!" Zoe squealed, and sat up. Grabbing a couple of napkins she started rubbing her belly fur, and gave me the evil eye.
"Hey, I said, I didn't do it on purpose!"
Fluff giggled again, and said, "Anyhow, closing time. Your bunch of deadbeats are the last of the customers."
So we all helped Brent and Trixie; the couple who owned the place, to clean up and shut down until the next day. It went pretty quick, even though a few of Fluff's friends from the hostel had already found rides there were still plenty of us left to pitch in. As John and I were walking around putting the chairs and benches up on the tables he said,
"You know, something you said earlier has really made me think."
"Well, don't hurt yourself." I replied.
"Oh, har-de-har-har, John said, but seriously, that crack you made about 'Peter's Taxi Service' made me think, why not start one? A taxi service, one mainly for hares? A lot of the taxis around here won't even pick up hares, say we shed all over the seats and stink them up. We'd probably get more than enough business, most hares don't even own cars, so have to get around somehow; we can only walk so far.
"Wow, I said, you're a real entramanure, know whut I mean, Vern?"
"Bite me Ernest, he said, but no, think about it. A lot of the damn buses won't even stop if there are hare's waiting at bus stop, and you know how dangerous it can be for one of us to be walking around alone, almost anywhere. And I think it's going to get even worse before it gets better.
"OK, I said, but can we afford it? I mean, we'd have to buy Taxis, and then there are the permits, insurance, maintenance, and all sorts of other stuff. Plus I doubt the local cab companies would appreciate the competition, and I think they're union too. We do NOT need the unions pissed off at us."
"Hell, John said, they don't want our business anyway, and who says they even have to know?? Screw buying Taxis and all the red tape, we just do it with regular vans and cars, and its word of mouth, hares only. No humans allowed. And we just charge them for the gas; and maybe a couple of bucks for our trouble. Be more like giving friends a ride."
"Weeell, it might work, I said, but when would be have the time? I mean, we're pretty busy all day, and we do have to sleep, you know."
"Hmphh, he said, we mere mortals do, but from the sounds you and Zoe don't. Do you know how loud you two are sometimes?"
"Hmphh, yourself, I said, you and Tina don't exactly keep the volume down either. You were up till two last night!"
"Well, we DO tend to overdo it a bit sometimes, John said smugly. Ever since the change our love life has really taken off; and no regrets about that."
"Amen brother, I said, but still, I mean, I'm willing to give it a try, but like I said, the most we could manage is an hour or two each every evening after work, we wouldn't get much business that way."
"I wasn't thinking so much about us, but what about Tina and Zoe, or some of the other hare's at the hostel that need work? We could let them use the company vans after work, and maybe even buy a couple more from Freddie if the thing takes off. Even a little more income would be great, and it would provide a service we need badly."
"Hey, I said, you convinced me the second you said 'seriously'. But what about insurance? I mean, if they have an accident we're fucked."
"Hmm, yeah, good point. John mused, then brightened, "I know, I'll 'hire' them as part-time workers for the lawn and grounds business, that way they can legally drive any of the company vehicles! If they have an accident, they can say they were just running an errand for the company."
"Brilliant, I said, you should have been a lawyer."
"Hey, no call for insults!" John chuffed in amusement.
We heaved the last heavy bench on top of a table, and Brent came over to shoo us out, saying he'd sweep up. We collected the doe's from the kitchen where they'd been helping with the dishes; and yakking like magpies, and Brent and Trixie escorted us to the door, and after nose rubs all around we piled into the van, and headed for the hostel to drop off Fluff and her entourage. A few of the others had found other rides, so the van wasn't quite as crowded on the return trip.
We were all pleasantly stuffed and sleepy, and even though it wasn't far several bucks and does nodded off. We had the windows down as it was a warm night, and with nine hares in the van it was very warm, and Fluff had her nose stuck out of a window for the cool breeze. We didn't care much for the AC; it makes the air too dry. I was half asleep myself, but slammed the brakes when Fluff suddenly squealed.
Fluff was tired; but happy, it had been a long night, but the tips had been better then average and she'd picked up a fair amount of change. The van was kind of stuffy, so she stuck her nose and ears out the window to help cool off, otherwise she would have missed it. She caught a whiff of someone's scent that she knew, and saw a dark form in the alcove of a close-down storefront's entrance. She pulled her head back inside, and yelled,
"E-eeeek, Stop the van!"
'Holy crapola!' I thought as I slammed the brakes, and with surprised squeals and yelps all the hares in the back ended up in a pile of kicking legs and twitching ears.
Zoe and I had our belts on, so other then getting jerked a little we were fine, and I yelled, "Who the Hell did that?! Did I hit something, what happened?"
Meanwhile the furry heap in the back was sorting itself out, with some very rude comments being directed my way, and then the side door opened and Fluff hopped out and ran back down the road, disappearing into a doorway.
"Geez, John said, what was that all about?"
"Man, I have NO idea, Fluff yelled like someone just bit her ear, and jumped out and ran off! I said, you better go after her, I need to pull over somewhere before we get rear ended!"
"OK!" John said, and took off after Fluff. Someone closed the door, and I backed up a little so I could pull over to the curb.
Fluff crouched down and looked at the small hare who was curled up under an old jacket in the corner of the boarded up doorway. He looked back at her with big eyes, and said,
"I'm sorry; I'll move on, I was just resting a little bit. Please don't hurt me!"
"Jeremy, Fluff said, it's me, Fluff, from 'The Clover Patch', what are you doing here? Don't you have any place to go, honey?"
The buck visibly relaxed, and said, "N-No, not really. I sleep here sometimes, if it's colder I know a couple places with more shelter, but this is good on warm nights. I'm OK, I'm used to it."
"Well, Fluff said, not tonight, you're coming with me!"
About then John came running up, and Jeremy tensed, and said "Who's that!?"
"His name is John, Fluff said, he's a friend. John, this is Jeremy, he's new in town and doesn't have anywhere to sleep. Is it OK if he catches a ride with us to the hostel? I have an empty bed in my room, one of my roommates just moved out."
"Yeah, sure, John said, be glad to. Come on, little buddy."
"But I-I'm fine, I don't want to be any trouble!" Jeremy said, resisting a little as Fluff took him by the arm.
"Wouldn't argue, if I were you, John said, you'll lose."
"Why John, what a nice thing to say!" Fluff chuffed, and even Jeremy gave a squeak of amusement.
As Fluff helped Jeremy up she realized just how thin he really was, his arm bones felt like sticks, and he weighed hardly anything. Despite the warm night he was shivering a little, so she draped his jacket over his shoulders and helped him walk. He kept trying to pull away from her at first, but finally just leaned against her, and she could feel his body heat. He's sick, she realized, he has a fever!
As they reached the van Jeremy suddenly sagged, and she grabbed him with a worried squeal.
"John, he's sick! We need to go to the hospital!"
John felt Jeremy's nose, and grunted in worry. "You're right, he's burning up!"
That was really odd as normally hares just didn't get sick, it was a result of our DNA sequencing being changed and re-arranged into something entirely new, our immune systems kick ass. But it did happen, and usually it was pretty serious.
"Who the heck is that?" I asked as Fluff and John returned to the van, anxious and curious muzzles pressed against the glass and sticking out the windows trying to see what was going on, noses quivering.
"Friend of Fluff's, John said, and he's sick, we need to get him to a hospital."
"Peter, there's that 24hr Minor Emergency Clinic on 4th and Taylor, it's closest!" Zoe said.
So I hit the gas and we took off in a squeal of tires, and I could see Fluff holding the stranger in her lap, gently stroking his ears. And I knew they were right, I could smell it now, he was definitely sick. He was pretty small too, and at first I thought he was a child.
John came running back from the entrance to the Minor Emergency Clinic, and was livid. "They said they don't take 'animals'! Bastards said to try a Vet!"
That brought a round of outraged squeals and exclamations of rage from the hares in the van, my own rather rude comment mixed in. A couple bucks wanted to go inside and have a little 'talk', but the doe's nixed that idea.
"Well, just great, I said. What do we do now?"
One of Fluff's friends spoke up, "I know a Vet who might help, she set my leg when I broke it last year, and she's nearby."
"Sounds like a plan", I said, and we took off again as soon as she gave me the address.
It took some pounding on the door to wake the Vet up, but as soon as she found out what we wanted she opened up, and Fluff hurried in carrying Jeremy. She went in with the Vet, while the rest of us stayed in the waiting room. Some of us went back out to the van, while the rest plopped down on the rather uncomfortable hard plastic seats. We didn't' say much, just kept our eyes and ears on the door to the exam area, everyone really concerned.
About an hour later the Vet came out, and gave us a tired smile, and we all relaxed. She was a middle-aged lady, and her smile was reassuring.
"He'll be fine, she said, it's a good thing you brought him in though."
"What's wrong with him Doctor?" I asked.
"Nothing really specific, she answered, it's a mix of several things. The main thing is the poor dear was almost starved to death, he should weigh about thirty to forty more pounds then he does. That and malnutrition really messed up his metabolism, so he was susceptible to a hare version of strep throat, but in his case it was serious. I gave him some shots and put him on an IV drip as he was borderline dehydrated too. A few good meals and he'll be fine. I'm keeping him here tonight, but tomorrow he can go home. You should report this, he's been horribly mistreated, and for a long time."
"Thanks so much, Doctor, John said, what do we owe you?"
"Don't worry about that right now, the Vet said, we can take care of that later."
"Fluff, I said, sticking my head in the door to the recovery room, we're leaving now."
Fluff was sitting by the bed, gently stroking Jeremy's ears, and replied "I'm staying."
"The Vet said he'll be out for most of a day, I said, she'll take good care of him."
"I'm STAYING." Fluff said, a little louder; without taking her eyes off the hare in the bed, so I just smiled and pulled my head back. Frankly I hadn't doubted she would.
"Where' Fluff?" John asked, as we all piled back in the van.
"Where to you think?" I replied as I hopped in the driver's seat.
"Ohhh, right." He said.
The Vet; whose name was Betty Thatcher, looked at the young doe sitting by the bed and watching over the sleeping buck, and smiled; "He's lucky to have such a good friend." She finally said, it's a good thing you brought him here."
Fluff flicked her ears toward the Vet, but didn't take her eyes off Jeremy. He was breathing fairly rapidly, mouth open as he panted. "Didn't have much choice, she said, the Emergency Clinic turned us away."
Betty frowned, but could understand why, even though she didn't like it. "They're not really equipped to treat ani-...er, hares."
Fluff snorted, "You mean animals?"
"Well, yes, Betty said. There really are major differences in how animals are treated as opposed to people. What would work on a human might kill an animal, and the other way around. I'm sorry, but that's the truth. Even if they had seen him they might have only done him more harm. Please understand."
Fluff gave a sigh, and looked up at the Vet. "I'm sorry, you've been very kind, and you're right. I know that, it just...well, it's more than just that. I just get tired of all the meanness."
"I know, I've seen how some people treat hares, and it's inexcusable. He's lucky to have you for a friend."
"I'm probably the only friend he does have, poor little thing." Fluff said quietly, and gave one of his ears a stroke.
After we dropped off the load of hares at the Bunny Hostel it was pretty quiet in the van as we drove home, our thoughts on Fluff and her new found friend. Fluff was like that, she'd taken lots of homeless or distraught hares under her wing before. She'd make a great mother if she ever mated permanently.
"Well, good night." I told John and Tina as Zoe and I headed for the apartment.
"See you tomorrow, John said, bright and early."
I made a rude noise, and replied "Don't bet on it!"
"We need to talk about the Taxi idea." John said.
"Well, I'll wander down as soon as I'm up." I promised.
"Well, John said, at least before noon for a change!"
"Hey, I'm not THAT bad!" I replied indignantly.
"Are TOO!" Zoe and Tina both said at the same time.
"If you're not up by nine I'll dump a bucket of cold water on you." Zoe said.
"You wouldn't dare!" I said, and chased her up the apartment stairs while she squealed in mock terror.
"Oh great, they'll be at it half the night!" John said to Tina.
"Well, since they'll be keeping us up, Tina replied, we'll have to find something to do ourselves." And slowly gave John's ear a very erotic lick. They almost made it to the bedroom.
Zoe gave a soft squeal of pleasure as I mounted her again, and I buried my muzzle in her soft warm neck fur, churring in ecstasy as I thrust into her in a nice slow steady rhythm. We'd worked the edge off our lust, and it was time to make love more as intelligent beings then animals. When we mate our need is so intense the first couple of times are little more than bestial rutting, which is wonderful. The subsequent matings are wonderful too, but we're more in control.
I was taking her from behind, which is the natural position for hares, and had my arms wrapped around her body while my hands rubbed and tweaked her rigid nipples causing her to grunt and give short loud squeals of pleasure. I knew what she liked, and she knew what I liked. She had amazing control of her vaginal muscles, and they were clenching and loosening in an amazingly pleasurable way as I fucked her. No matter how many times we'd mated it was still as amazing as the first time, and in fact just got better. As we neared climax I gently bit one of her ears, and she shuddered and gave a groan of ecstasy as my cock pulsed and spurted deeply into her eager sex and I squealed from the intense pleasure of my release. Ear nibbling and biting is extremely erotic for hares, our ears are erogenous zones and are incredibly sensitive.
With a final grunt of pleasure I pulled out of her, and we collapsed side by side and cuddled for awhile, gently nobbling and grooming one another, which was almost as pleasurable as the sex as we licked and ran our claws through one another's fur. Finally we finished our post-mating grooming, and Zoe laid her head on my shoulder with a happy sigh, and said,
"I hope Fluff and her new friend are OK, I hated to leave them there."
"Well, I said, I don't think Dr. Thatcher would have appreciated our doing what we just did in her waiting room."
Zoe gave a snort of amusement, and said, "I wouldn't have complained!"
"Don't worry about Fluff, I said sleepily, she' a force of nature. No one would DARE mess with her!"
"You got that right! Zoe sniggered, then added more solemnly, "I don't know what I would have done without her, or you."
"And I don't know what I would have done without you." I said, and meant it; she was the best thing that had ever happened to me. Then I gave her ear a loving lick, and one thing led to another, and we didn't get much sleep that night.
The End
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