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Finding an Answer (rewrite)

A smile crept to Tabitha's muzzle as she gazed upon her creation, her labia growing wet as her sexual nectar began to drool from within, but the moment didn't last. Her smile of accomplishment faded, drowned out by the symbology of the toy mounted stool. She had been seeing Ben for nearly two years now and living with him for the last year of their relationship. She hadn't thought anything of it when Ben became to busy with work, family or a friends crisis to attend to her sexual needs while they where dating and still living in separate apartments. Even after they moved in together, bought a house together, she didn't mind him packing up and leaving to stay with a friend during that first heat together. She didn't even mind being left alone to deal with her needs during her second heat, she knew that Ben didn't want children yet and she could understand that because she didn't want them either, not yet anyway.

However when she started her third season and Ben had packed up with a flimsy excuse, she felt that she needed to confront him about his abandonment of her. The argument became heated and then a really, really bad fight where all of the bad, hurtful feelings that both of them had been bottling up over the last year came out in a spectacular explosion.

It had rocked their relationship severely, cracking it's foundation to its core and leaving them on unsteady ground, even now as she looked down upon the toy Tabitha could feel the hurtful ramifications of that fight's fallout.

So here she was, alone and abandoned by the one she loved in her time of need, staring at a vibrator in the dank little room that had become her art studio. She had mentally built up this moment, this act to the point that if allowed to take place would be the breaking point in her relationship with Ben. The only thing that held Tabitha back from mounting the stool and letting the toy slid deeply into her needy body, was that she felt that if she used it to fulfill her needs she was somehow cheating on Ben. That although she might not be betraying his trust and faith in their relationship by sharing herself with another male, she was still seeking out someone, something else to ease her suffering during her heat. Not that Ben was giving her much of a choice.

With one last lustful glance at the toy the rabbit reluctantly tore her gaze from the stool and the vibrator she had mounted on it, turning to leave the dimly lit basement studio and giving her so-called boyfriend another chance to quell her burning heat. He had said that he had left because he didn't want children yet, that it was to risky for them to have sex, to mate while she was fertile, but it wasn't as if he was a cat or anything he could still use a condom, he just choose to continue ignoring her, her needs, her pleas, instead.

The wooden stairs connecting the basement to the houses two car garage squeaked in protest at even the doe's slight weight as she made her way up, moving along room by room of the all too empty house to the kitchen, acutely aware of how Ben's linger scent was becoming faint from his absence. She passed the off white fridge and the overly lacquered oak counters, to come to rest at the wall-mounted phone, staring at the white receiver for several long minutes, trying to decide if she should even bother to stir up her hurt emotions again or not. Tabitha sighed and picked up the receiver, dialing in the number to where Ben was currently staying. "Hey Kevin, It me Tabitha. Is...is Ben there? I need to ask him about something."

"Hey Tabi. Yeah let me go get him for ya. Hold on a sec."

A small, soft smile crept to the doe's chocolate colored muzzle when she heard the warm friendly tone of a smile in the bobcat's reply. She had met him from when Ben was coming home after running away from her during that first heat in their home together. A friendship beyond their mutual interest in Ben quickly developed, he had always seemed so nice to her, listening so attentively to whatever she was saying when they talked that she couldn't help but like him.

Their relationship deepened even as her and Ben's worsened, they had even shared a kiss during her last heat, A little more then a kiss actually. Ben had been complaining about her, about the fight and Kevin had come by to check up on her. They had talked for a long time, making a point to enjoy each other's company as they did so. Even now she wasn't sure if it was her heat or some subconscious desire to leave Ben for him that made her come on to him but soon after that first hesitant kiss, a questioning touch of the lips she found herself on her back, his hand between her thighs, digging oh so wonderfully into her groin. She had only come to her senses when he had stopped and moved between her legs, sliding the hem of her sundress up in preparation to mount her.

That had been two months ago and they hadn't spoken let alone spent much time together since it happened. At first, it was because he was angry with her, with himself, for allowing things to go as far as they did. However once she had came out of her heat and they had been able to talk about the incident with clear heads, they were able to work things out between themselves and they both agreed it had been for the best for them and their relationship with Ben. So no the reason why the two of them hadn't been around each other much is because whenever Tabitha had found herself alone with Kevin feelings of guilt and shame would bubble up from within her, making her uncomfortable until she finally had to leave, sometimes while in mid conversation with him.

Her mind wandered as she waited for Ben o pick up the phone, unable to stop herself from fantasize about what she had missed out on by not sleeping with well-muscled tawny cat. She bit down her lower lip and murred, pressing her inner thighs together when she felt her inner muscles began to flutter. Tabitha turned and leaned against the wall, closing her eyes as she slowly slid her hand along her breast, her fingers playing along her areola and teasing her hardening nipple before sliding down the even rows of her teats, pass her navel, making its way to her winking sex when Ben finally picked up the phone.

"Hello?" His voice was neutral, questioning as to who was on the other end of the line.

"Ben? It's me... It's Tabitha. I know you don't want kids right now and I agree, we should wait but... look I...I need you right now. We don't have to have sex. You...you could just finger me or...or fuck me with a vibrator I don't care, I just want it to be you that gets me off. Please... I love you."

Her answer was a long pregnant silence, broken finally by his reply, his voice turning cold and frigid. "No. Not now, not when you're fertile."

Tabitha mutely hung her head in defeat at Ben's words, hugging the receiver to the honey creamed colored fur of her chest as she fought back the hot frustrated tears that welled up from deep within her. So that was it then, she had her answer, he would never be there to comfort her, to love her at her worse until he was ready to have kids. Stuck in some kind of half life until he choose it was to time to...to breed her like some animal, spitting out kid after kid until he had all he ever wanted and abandoning her when he no longer needed her.

Silent tears wracked the doe's body as she slid down the wall weeping, weeping for what she had just lost, a house, a lover, a friend...a home. Slowly the girl curled in upon herself, hugging herself tightly as she sobbed bitterly, rocking back and forth in a futile attempt to ease the cold painful emptiness that suddenly crackled open in her chest and threatening to steal her breath away.

Long, lonely hours passed within the all to still house for the weeping doe, the only sound was of her falling tears, drowning out all the other ambient sounds as they echoed throughout the kitchen and the rooms beyond. Eventually however the faintly repeating chime followed by the operator's "If you'd like to make a call please hang up and try again" drummed it way into Tabitha's frozen thoughts and she stared blankly at the black receiver still clutched within her numb hands.

Slowly, stiffly Tabitha got to her feet, her body occasionally jerking sporadically through a ragged breath like some kind of broken doll, she could barely keep her tears in check, she felt so empty, so hollow inside that it hurt. Her mind was still, quiet...numb...as she turned toward the phone's base, mechanically lifting her gaze from her bosom and the receiver she still clutched there, hugging it as if it was some kind of lifeline. Reluctantly the dark colored rabbit doe hung up the phone, her fingers lingering on the receiver almost lovingly, it was her lifeline, the last thing holding her back, the last thing connecting her with Ben.

Maybe I should call him again, beg him to come home and be with me.

Sudden anger flared within the rabbit at the thought, filling the cold empty spaces with a burning rage. I shouldn't have to! He should love me enough to be with me! Why couldn't he just try to understand what she wanted, needed now. Tabitha's lips pull back into an angry snarl, exposing her blunt fore teeth as she screamed obscenitiesat the top of her lungs. The enraged rabbit picked up the receiver, hammering it against its base again and again as the fury of Ben's continued denial of her needs bubbled forward, stopping only when her arms began to burn, her hands painfully pulsing in tune with her quickened heartbeat did she backed away from the wreckage of the phone. Tabitha flexed her fingers through the pain, panting heavily as she dully observed the broken, caved in wall and the floor-strewn remnants of the plastic phone before turning from the sight in disgust.

Dark thoughts raged though the doe's mind as she stalked her way to the basement studio through the empty, lonely house. A sudden flash of light caught the doe's attention as she passed through the living room and she moved to the picture-adorned mantle. Fresh tears began to well up from the corners of the doe's eyes as she looked at the various pictures, each one a frozen windows to a happier time between her and Ben, her rage twisting or denying the happiness trapped with them. A guttural, primal scream ripped itself from the doe and she swung her arms out, trying to banish, to destroy the objects that where causing her so much pain.

Fuck him! If that asshole doesn't want to be with me then I'll...I'll go and fuck myself with that...thing like I had planned in the first place...

Tabitha slammed the small basement studio's door and yanked on the single openly exposed bulb's chain, seething as she paced in front of the toy-mounted stool. The rabbit doe stopped and growled in frustration at her hesitation, why was she so reluctant to commit this one last freeing act? He had given her his answer. That he was only willing to be with her when HE wanted, when HE was ready to impregnate her, when He was ready to have kids, her wishes, her dreams be damned.

The doe bowed her head humbly, her arms going limp, falling to her sides in self defeat. She already knew the answer, she just didn't want to admit it to herself. She hesitated because deep down, below her hurt and rage she stilled loved him and didn't want to betray him, to hurt him.

"Why am I doing this to myself? Why am I letting that impotent asshole loser get to me? I should just go to a club and get laid and be done with this, with him."

Tabitha ran a paw through her head fur, feeling the slight moisture of sweat collect along the edge of her leading finger. She licked her lips nervously, biting down on her bottom lip in deep thought as she reluctantly took a faltering step backwards away from the toy, her freedom as her confidence in a future without Ben wavering.

Ben's cold reply suddenly echoed loudly in mind. "No. Not now, not when you're fertile."

Tabitha's jaw tightened with new found determination and she roughly grabbed the front of her semi faded dark green blouse and violently ripped it open, the buttons noisily flying around the room as she exposed herself to the cool air of the room. She thoughtlessly discarded the ruined garment behind her before beginning to wok on the leather belt that hugged her hips, holding up her long soft blue-grey plated skirt. She yanked on the stubborn clasp with a single hand several times before finally giving up with a silent curse and looked down past her trim stomach to work on the belt with both hands, finally freeing the latch with a single attempt. She yanked the offending garment down past her hips, stepping on the skirts hem to pull it the rest of the way off before kicking it deeper into the room, a crash telling her that she had hit the lamp on her art desk, it's destruction adding to her fury.

Finally stripped down to her bare fur the rabbit moved to the stool and aggressively straddled the vibrator, painfully crushing the toy against her sensitive flesh. Tabitha jumped back up off the stool screaming profanities before grabbing and hurling the offending toy mounted stool against the cluttered wall of the dank, claustrophobic room.

Tabitha sighed as she finally brought her raging emotions back under control and looked at the destruction her fury had wrought. The trimming around the door was cracked and splintered and the sheetrock where the stool had smashed into was broken and slightly collapsed inward. A sly, dirty smile slowly crept to the doe's muzzle as she looked down upon what was once the seating of the ruined stool, finding that the vibrator she had mounted to it had somehow remained attached. Her paw gripped around the phallus, rubbing along its rubbery shaft briefly before turning it, lustfully smiling as a mechanical hum filled the dimly lit room.

Tabitha licked her lips in lustful anticipation as she knelt over the humming vibrator, her hand sliding sensually across her lower abdomen from her hip to the glistening petals of her sex. She shivered in delight at the rough texture of her fingers as they slid along her turgid labia, opening herself as she slowly aligned the vibrating toy's tip with her vagina opening. The chocolate colored doe relaxed hips and legs, letting her honey creamed colored thighs slid apart at their own leisurely pace, watching with heavy half-lidded eyes as her shimmering groin lowered towards the toy and her sexual fulfillment. She arched her back involuntarily as the toy began to push against her outer petals before penetrating her, sliding in and separating her further. Her lips pull back in a snarling grimace as she inhaled sharply, roughly sliding her paws over the hardening teats that lining her taught, trim abdomen, seeking and then clenching around her upper most breast in shuddering ecstasy.

Panting heavily with lust the rabbit begins to buck against the toy repeatedly, working it against her sex, grinding it deeper into her swollen petals. One of her paws falls to her groin, seeking her clit as the muscles along her birth canal and womb spasm violently, almost painfully. A euphoric bliss builds within her, radiating out along her pelvis before coming to an abrupt orgasmic stop, her inner muscles contracting, covering the humming toy in her ejaculate when its tip found and slid slightly into her blood-engorged passage.

She gasps and then moans through her quick panting breath as she relaxes, letting her weight pull her down, to open her thighs wider and allow the toy to press further into her canal, stretching and pinching the resistant muscles of her vaginal walls as it dug deeper within her. She bucked her hips forward savagely again and again, euphoric pain blossoming through the rabbits vaginal walls as they cramped and complain from her fucking herself so hard on with the unyielding vibrator, her ecstatic grunts all but drowning out the wet squashing sound coming from the toy within her gender.

The sweat from the doe's exertion began to dampen the already dark fur of the rabbits back, hips and outer thighs, darkening it to an almost black as it caused it to cling wetly to her shapely body. Shuddering through one last painfully grinding thrust Tabitha stretched upward with trembling arms, screaming as her orgasm consumed her, washing her consciousness away from her in a tidal wave of bliss.

Tabitha awoke later in the night, stretching out along the chilly floor, trying to ease the sore, bruised feeling from her genitals as they throbbed achingly from the roughness of what she had done. She rolled onto her back and began running her hands languidly along her stomach and inner thighs, rubbing her groin vigorously as she basked in the afterglow of her sexual gratification. She felt happier then she had in a very long, long time.

With an unhurried ease the doe got to her feet, stretching full bodily again and smiling dreamily as she felt her muscles spam and play just beneath her skin as she looked around the ransacked, cluttered room. Tabitha shrugged with an indifference to the mess, it and the potent fragrance of her heated scent mixed with the recent sexual act would be one last reminder of what Ben had thrown away when he came home to find her gone.

As the rabbit doe made her way upstairs to take a shower, she couldn't help but smile as the feeling of...freedom settled upon her. That one last act severing her ties with Ben completely. She was truly free now, free from Ben's selfishness, his neglect of her needs, free from his cruel and abusive abandonment of her, and she would be free from her loneliness soon enough. After all if Ben didn't want to be with her then she could find someone who would. Someone who would take care of her, love her when she needed it and not just when it was convenient for them. Someone she could call a mate.

Maybe Somebody like Kevin...

A wry smile caressed the doe's muzzle at the thought, after all, the only thing that had stopped them from being with one another before was their loyalty to Ben.