Soul Shattered Chapt. 7: Plane To Germany
The whole Den was a bustle as my Pack was getting ready for the leave. Blurs of fur and paws streaked past me like dark shadows. Everybody was awaiting this trip. We were all excited to be back in Germany, seeing old friends. But for me, I was a wreck. My nerves were on edge. I just couldn't seem to wrap my head around it all. This meeting . . . I just don't know. It felt like something bad.
But, that didn't matter know. Not with my Mate with me.
Sadly, now was not the time to think about all this. I have to help my friends pack.
I turned away from Darren and flitted to my dresser, pulling out a few clothes. Then I walked back and stuffed them in my duffle bag. My paws glided over the contents of the bag, checking if I had everything I needed.
Kari walked in with his duffle bag. It was a crisp black--the same as mine. But the pattern in the center was different; it was a dark blue crescent moon with wicked edges, unlike mine with a more unique pattern in a loftily dark red.
He slid over to me and pecked me a kiss on the check. "Ok, love. The Pack is nearly ready. We'll be waiting by the van when you're done," He said in werewolf tongue.
"Alright, I'm almost done. I'll be done in a sec," I replied.
When Kari felt, I instantly went back to work, stuffing my things in the duffle. I looked over to Darren and Tristan and saw their dumfounded expressions--which were kinda funny; I had to stifle a giggle.
"Chris, didn't you say that werewolves had their own language?" Darren asked.
I nodded. "Yes, the Language of the Wolves, though it's nearly impossible to for a human to learn the language."
"Why?"
"Because it's how wolves and dogs communicate. You know, through growls, whines, body language, but in human language," I explained.
"Ah . . .," they said in union.
I shook my head. "You'll are idiots, but I love you."
I turned away from my friends and finished packing--making sure I had everything. When I was positive I did, I zipped the bag up and hoisted it over my shoulder and headed downstairs, my friends following in my wake. I quickly flitted to the fridge to grab a water and blood bottle and then walked out into the garage. As promised, all six pack-mates were already in the van.
I looked through the heavily tinted windows of the van. Everybody was inside.
I turned to my Darren and Tristan and hugged them both. "Ok, you guys. I'm gonna miss you. Now, you two know you can use my Den when I'm gone, stay over for the night, come here and watch a movie when you want to be alone, ect--you guys know. Just make sure nothing is broken or anything. I want to come back home the way I left it."
They looked at me uneasily.
"Oh, lighten up you two. God, you have a whole house to yourself," I said, giving them a light punch on the arm. It was sad that I was going to leave them; I really wanted them to come, but sense their human they can't. But I guess sense I'm leaving them the Den for awhile they'll be good.
"Love you two," I said as I revved the van to life and sped off into the starry night. I pulled out of the woods and onto the road. I few cars passed by as I drove to the highway. The closest airport was near us was Manitowoc Country Airport. So I would have to take I-151, passing through conjoining highways.
The moon struck high in the starry sky. Dark, eluding shadows cut through the forest. The mass of trees were glittered with moonlight, making the high trees frosted with snow. Moonlight lit the dark road before us. Creatures were staring to stir at the twilight hour, waking up from their slumber.
I looked around the small, compacted van. My Pack were doing their own thing; Luc and Mora were watching a movie--well, so were Rena and Allen. Kora and Crystal were sharing headphones--ear buds, for obvious reasons. And Kari was sitting in the passenger seat next to me, of course.
He held my paw, lacing his fingers into mine. I felt my mind go adrift. I always felt so calm and serene with him around me. Sometimes even it was hard to think, let alone breathe with him around.
My heart thudded in my chest when Kari's finger intertwined with mine. My breathing speed up--just a little bit.
I shook my head, trying to clear it. I needed to pay attention to the road. Grabbing my water bottle, I took a gulp of the icy water, feeling it quench my thirst.
Lights and cars zoomed by as I drove, their presence evaporating through the rear-view mirror as I passed by. The trees started to thin, few and few coming in view, as I drove away from the comfort of the forest I was leaving behind. It made me joyful when I would be back and I would be able to return the thicket of trees I knew so well.
The surplus of trees thinned out even more as I made my way to the highway. It saddened me.
In due time, we were already at the Manitowoc Country Airport, sliding through the sleek line of cars, making our way the Den's private entrance. We made a sharp near turn onto a road that snaked behind the main entrance of the building's lobby and drove to the complex building reserved for Pack members. The entrance was blocked by the giant Iron Gate with a giant wolf howling in the center of the gate.
I pulled up the call box. A bulky man stood inside the box, his golden eyes glittered in the light. His sandy hair was pulled into a tight ponytail. His arms were crossed and he had on t-shirt that said, "Security". He leaned out of the window when he saw me pull up.
"Good . . .well, night Ms. Valor," the gate-guard called out.
I smiled at him.
I reached out and punched in the code into the keypad. The gate creaked and screeched on its hinges as the two iron doors folded outward. I drove inside.
"The Selit Pack has just arrived and is about to board," the guard said into an intercom, and instantly I heard the jet's propellers roared to life. It was a slow roar at first but soon it built up.
This made me cringe--not because it was loud, but because of the thought of flying. It unsettled me.
"It's ok, love," Kari said, obviously listening to my thoughts. He squeezed my paw and raised it to his lips and gave the back of my paw a gentle kiss. God, did it make my heart flutter when he cared about me.
I rubbed his paw against my check.
I pulled the van to a stop, parking it close the plane. Jumping out, I made my way to the jet, stepping on the stairs that led into passenger side.
The jet seat's were furnished with an egg-shell tan leather, the head rest stitched with a soft fabric. The rest of the enterer of the plan was the same tan color. Near the back of the plane was a couch and near it was a mini-fridge stocked with all sorts of perishables. Across the couch I saw a TV screen and DVD player under it. Next to it was cabinet which I'm sure was filled with DVD's.
All the things we needed for our entertainment.
I took a seat on the couch, guiding my Mate with me. I got comfy on the couch while Kari went to the mini-fridge and pulled out a Pepsi and a bottle water bottle. He tossed the soda to me and took his seat next to me.
The rest of my pack took their seats.
I didn't really like riding an expensive jet like this to Germany. I would have been more comfortable on a commercial airline. But, with wolves in my Pack it would have been impossible.
But still . . . I don't think I'd be able to handle a whatever-hour long flight to Germany without my Mate. He knew how to calm me down.
We waited a few minutes as the pilots did a check-over of the air-craft. Time zipped by slowly, prolonging the flight out of the small town of Valder's, Wisconsin. . . .
"Ok, passengers, we are about the head out. So, please relax and enjoy your flight," the pilots said into the intercom.
I didn't know with was louder, the screeching of the engine or the pound of my heart, booming in my ears. My heart thudded in my chest, pressing against my rib cage.
Kari wrapped his arm around my waist, his paws lightly rubbing my stomach. He rested his muzzle on my shoulder; his muzzle brushed against my neck. I could feel him inhaul, breathing in my scent.
I looked up and him and smiled. I took a gulp of my Pepsi while Crystal an' Kora picked out a movie. I really wasn't interested with the movie the two picked; I just wanted to do was be with my Mate.
I rummaged through my bag and pulled out a pair of headphones. Pulling out my iTouch, I looked through the mass of genre's and artist. I decided to listen to any of the normal Clubland CD's I had.
Slowly, as I listened to the steady pulsing bass and harmonic vocals, I felt myself drift off, head and eyes felt heavy--I was barely able to keep them open. My head felt cloudy, and soon I drifted off. . . .
~~~
Was I dead? Had I died in my wolf's arms? These questions seemed to bounce around inside my head. Surely I was dead. Had to be; there was no way I could have survived--not from all the blood lose I suffered from.
Yet . . . I felt alive. I could feel my body take steady, calm breathes. I could feel heat flow throughout my body. The sun's warmth breathed against my flaring skin. The sun's heat spread through my already hot body, making me feel even warmer.
I sucked in hot breaths. My lungs expanded with air--with oxygen.
I could feel my stomach squeeze with hunger, and my tongue ran over my sandpapery mouth, my throat parched. But how can I feel alive when I'm dead. I had to have died--it's the only way. Surly I couldn't have survived.
I swiftly went over the memories of the attack. I remembered it with such clarity that it shocked me. I could remember the different shades and colors of fur of each wolf--each werewolf. I could remember the different scents that loomed in the air, the scent that hung heavy in the atmosphere, or the feel of my burning body and the feel of the ice that engulfed me. Ice and fire, that's what it felt like, I burned and froze.
I could feel phantom pains, the agony of the bite, the feel of their razor teeth slicing through my soft flesh. My skin was paper white, a sickly paleness, from the blood loss. My stomach twisted from the thought of my blood spilling onto the earthly floor, staining the ground scarlet--or was it just the thought of blood made my throat burn with thirst?
I really didn't know which.
And then the thought of that . . . wolf made my heart flutter inside my chest. I thought of those strong, but gentle, paws that held me to his chest, and again my heartbeat faltered.
It wasn't until then that I felt my heart beat, pumping blood into my veins--another sign to show that I was still very much alive.
I just lay there on a mattress, or at least I think it is a mattress, and concentrated on my breathing. In, out. In, out. In and out.
A hand rested on my shoulder, and I cringed away from it. I slipped from the bed and hugged the wall. I looked around bewildered, and saw that same wolf held me as he stared back with what I think is a worried expression.
His body slowly lifted off the bed, as if he was going to walk over to me, but he stayed on the bed. He lowered his eyes, as if seeming to read my mind. I think I probably would have screamed if he did come near, or touch me again.
His ears pulled back to his skull.
There was a knock on the door. I held my ears, shuttering away from the loud noise. My eyes grew wide with fear, fear that more of those . . . those wolf things are out there. I knew they were there; I could smell them. How sick was that?
When the door opened, a muzzle stuck itself into the gap.
Panic and fear surged through my veins. I had to get out of here! I looked around the room again, avoiding the wolf, searching for an escape. There was a window right across from me, but the wolf was in front of it. It would be too risky if I tried it. The wolf would have attacked me before I even had a chance to wrench the door open.
A lanky wolf stepped in, followed by other wolf things. "Hey, Kari . . ." the wolf said. I stared at it bewilderedly. He-it looked at me and smiled a genius smile.
I shrank away, into the corner. I coward there, wrapping my arms around myself, cradling my head. My body rocked back and forth, and I mumbling, "Please don't kill me". Begging them not to kill me.
I felt the wolves shift a little in the room.
One of them drew nearer--I could tell by their growing scent. I shrank farther into the corner. The one that was close rested at paw on my shoulder. "Hey, it's ok . . ."
But I didn't want to listen. "Don't touch me!" I shriek. I recoiled away from the paw and leapt into the awaiting arms of the wolf in front of the window. He cradled me to him. It felt familiar. These arms had held me before.
I looked up into those cool, blue eyes of the wolf. "Please, please don't let them hurt me . . ." I sobbed. My tears stained both my cheeks and his fur.
The wolf brushed his paw through me hair. "Hey, hey," he gentle whispered. "It's ok. No one is going to hurt you. We're here to help."
I tried to look for a false note in his voice, but didn't find one. For some reason I knew he wasn't lying. I could sense it from the other wolfs. They weren't going to hurt me. And then it struck me. I knew that voice! It belonged to the wolf that held me while I died!
I looked up to those icy eyes of his. Those were his eyes!
"Kari . . ." I rolled the name on my tongue. I like it. It seemed to fit him.
"Ok, Kari," I said slowly. I still was a little uneasy to be in a room full of wolves, but for some reason, I felt safe.
Kari's paw slid down to hand, gently squeezing it, and pulled me from the bed. He and the rest of the wolves led me out of the room and down the stairs. They led me through the abandoned house and set me on the dusty couch. I sneezed, and a cloud of dust billowed in the somewhat stale air.
I looked around the room, which I assumed was the family room, at the tarnished wallpaper and the murky white ceiling. The couch I sat on was plush with a bleached blue. The edges of the arms rest were rimmed with stained wood. The carpet was long worn out, a washed-out tan. The room had its own fireplace--it's funny that this abandoned house would later become my Pack's Den.
I sat patiently while the wolves explained something's about what I am, about I want I can do. I listen contently, evaluating everything that was said. After they finished, I sat, speechless. I started mulling over what I was told. Was this possible? I'm a really a . . . werewolf. I forced myself to say. I'm some think of monster? I knew I wasn't a monster, deep inside me I knew I wasn't. But yet . . .
I trailed off on the thought.
"Chris, you ok?" The lanky wolf, Kora, asked.
Before I could answer, my stomach growled loudly and fiercely, demanding to be fed.
Everybody laughed. I blushed.
For weeks now, I've been able to hide my secret. But it's been hard. Once as I got home after talking with the wolves, I was bombarded with questions of what happened, was I ok, where was I. I quickly told them the lie I had worked on on the way home. It surprised me how smoothly the lies rolled of my tongue as if that were true.
But soon, after everybody was satisfied with my answers, the worry and questions stopped, which gave me a chance to be myself. Though I always had to watch myself, to make sure I don't crush a person's hand shaking it, or to make sure I'm not moving too fast. After the first few days, it been hard adjusting to my new body, but soon I get used to it and to all the new scents and sounds.
I've wondered what it would be like when I Changed, like would it hurt or would it just feel strange? Kari told me that I have my first Change wasn't until the next full moon--which was in a few days. But he said that after my first, I would be able to revert to either one of my forms when I wanted. I was questioning him about my other forms; he said I had two forms, a wolf form and then more of an anthro/hybrid form like his.
The first Change is with my anthro form and then my second Change is with my wolf form.
I was excited, but nerve as all hell.
A few times I've asked him what blood and raw meat tasted like to us. His answers were vague or unyielding. All he said that was that blood didn't have its usual coppery taste it did for humans.
I started out the window from Tristan and Darren's table. The sun was full and bright outside. Ugh. I've sort of developed sensitivity toward bright lights. I'd have to shield my eyes when I walked outside.
I looked away from the window and started at my half eaten food, fork raised to my mouth. I brought the fork full way and chewed slowly, savoring the taste.
"Chris . . ."I heard distantly. I looked up and saw Tristan staring at me.
"Are you ok?" he asked.
"Don't worry. I'm ok," I said through a mouth full of food, sort of muttering my words.
This made Tristan smile.
"Are you sure? You've been . . . distant these past few weeks after your supposed attack." He said supposed with extra emphasis. He didn't buy that nothing happened.
He was right; I had been distant for good reason. I had to have time to collect myself. It's not that I didn't trust myself around my friends and family, but I had to get used everything.
"Yes, I'm ok," I lied. The truth was I was nerves. Tonight was a full moon--my first full moon. I've been running all these expatiations of what it was like to Change, or the thrill of the hunt, or the taste of blood.
At the thought of blood, my mouth watered.
Tristan glared at me doubtfully. That was definitely one of the things I had admired around him, his insight. But now it worried me. He knew I was hiding something. That was not good.
I averted my eyes from Tristan's and started at Darren. He was paying more attention to his book then us. He looked up and started back at me, confused.
"We were just talking about what movie we want to see," Tristan said, still staring at me. His amber eyes were a mixer of emotions: curiosity, fear, worry, more curiosity.
To this day, it still fascinated me how I can scent people's emotions. It was kind of cool, but other times it unsets me when I smell someone reeking of fear when I talk to them when I wasn't trying to scare the person.
"Well . . ." Darren said. "What movie do you want to see?"
"Don't really know," I answered, grabbing my pack, and left the table for the library. I really don't need Tristan getting a little nosey.
The moon shone down on the forest full and brightly, casting silver everywhere. It just meant that the Change was near. I started pacing around the room, ranking my head over my nervousness. I was both nervous and excited--and what I think made it worse was all those werewolf movies running through my head. About being an uncontrollable blood thirst monster, which Kari reassured my wasn't going to be the case.
The thrill of it all made my heart throb and pound in my chest.
Again I kept pacing, which was doing me no good, but I couldn't help it. I felt a paw grasp me hand and pull me onto the couch. Kari wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him.
I nuzzled his neck, burying my facing into his sweet scented fur. I ran my hand across bare chest.
"It's going to be ok," Kari said.
"Hmm . . ." I murmured. I believed him, but I didn't find much comfort in those words. It still made me feel on edge. I wanted to wrench myself from him and start pacing again. So desperately I wanted to pace because I knew it wasn't ok. I was going to have my first Change, and I don't know how I'm going to react.
I started to get up but Kari's strong paws kept me in place. "Relax; it's going to be ok, really." He reached over and handed me a water bottle. I took it garishly and started taking deep gulps. I finished the bottle in three pulls.
Kari reached over again and grabbed another water bottle. I reached over, nearly snatching it from his paw. But he pulled it back, an eyebrow raised. "This time, take sips and try not to down the bottle in 5 seconds."
I glared at him but nodded. Restraining myself, I took good even sips as I was instructed. I felt the icy water wash down my throat. It felt good.
A few minutes later, the Pack started heading out, saying it was almost time for my Change. I kept close to Kari as we left the Den, anchoring myself to him. As we walked out I was struck with awe. The night seemed so . . . different now. It was a whole new world. When we stepped into a patch of silvery moonlight, my eyes grew wide as the light danced off my pale skin, like a steady strobe light. It made my already pale skin even paler, snowy.
I averted my eyes from my skin to the rest of the nightly world. Everything was lighter and throbbed with life. The way the moonlight painted the trees, and the dark, shadowy silhouette. I liked the sound of the leaves churching under me, it meant the earth was crisp and renewed, all ready and waiting for me to Change. It's as if the night perfected itself just for me, like it knew this was coming and that I was ready. It welcomed me with open arms, ready to lift me up and show me who I really was.
We trudged on, being weary of any humans that might be passing by. We reached a break in the trees and ambled into a large pasture that was pooled in light. The forest floor was clustered with fallen leaves.
My Pack spread out and basked in the light. I was still anchored to Kari; I didn't want to be away from him when I Changed. No. I needed him to be with me, to help me through it. He was the one think I keep my focus on if the Change was . . . unpleasant.
Minutes ticked by as the night drew on. It felt agonizing to have to wait. I didn't want to wait, couldn't wait. The longer it took, I knew, the more I get restless and start passing again.
I sat down with my . . . with my Mate. I wrapped my arms around his, lacing my fingers into his. It felt right to hold him, good. I knew with him by my side, I can do it. I can make it through the Change and be just fine. I knew--
Abruptly I was away from Kari. A burning fire raged within me. The heat spread through my body, slowly and surly, making sure it got every inch of me. Once the fire had engulfed me, I could feel my body changing, turning me into my new form. It started with the skin, turning a deep gray. Soon fur sprout from its place. My bones bent and stretched as it molded me (it didn't hurt exactly, but it felt really strange). I felt my eyes shift and soon the whole world was clearer and sharper. Next my ears popped; I could hear everything. The next thing to change was my face, twisting and contorting into a muzzle that was full of razor sharp teeth (my sense of smell maximizing in the processes). Last to follow was my tail, blossoming from my back.
Once my Change was complete, I lifted my muzzle the too nightly sky and howled deeply within my throat. Soon I was overcome by a burning thirst and hunger.
Soon I was off, racing through the trees to my prey. I flew past trees with surprisingly fast speed, my muscles rippling with awesome power. It burned deep within me. Without full thinking of it, I leapt into the air and started leaping from tree trunk to tree trunk. I kept going at it, stocking for prey. I leapt onto a thick, ruff bough, digging my sharp claws in the wood, my tail lolling over the edge.
I took a deep sniff and caught a musky scent. Deer, my brain told me, and then I saw them. Good, I had found my prey. I stepped off my branch and fell to the earth floor, landing on my paws with easy. I crouch forward, keeping my prey in site. I felt my muscles tense up as I was ready to string. I bolted into the clearing, fangs bared, and claws extended, racing for the nearest deer that came into view. Once I saw her, I kept her as my target--but with a quick analyzes, I used my other senses to make sure she wasn't pregnant. I didn't want to kill a pregnant doe--that'd be horrible.
I leapt at her with fierce speed, my hunger and thirst goading me on. Landing on the female, I sank my fangs into flesh. She screamed and started shaking me off, but her feeble attempts were fruitless as I just I latched my jaws onto her like a vice. Soon, her attempts became more and more weak, and soon her she dropped and her heart stopped.
Slowly, I stepped away from my kill and, again, howled to the moon--but this time in victory. I can't believe it! My first kill; it was excited and thrilling. I wanted to hunt again, I don't know whether that should scare me or not. I decided to put it to the back of my mind.
I dipped my muzzle to the carcass and sniffed. The blood smelled . . . sweet. I lapped at the wound that I created. The blood tasted sweet. Soon I was in frenzy, tearing at the carcass with flaring hunger, taking gulped of the blood that danced on my tongue. I savored the taste, of the meat and blood. And as I devoured everything, I could sense my hunger and thirst dissipating.
I stopped in the middle of my feed and lifted my head, searched around. Something was wrong, off. A scent flooded my nose, and a sudden strange panic feeling surged through me.
I heard the voice before I saw it.
"Chris!" the voice said. I froze.
I looked around, and saw Darren and Tristan staring at me.