Yorick Vs. The FREAKIN' TENTACLES!
So this is a story for everyone about how I feel about tentacles. A wee little quicky I wrote because playing dolphin olympics got boring. Sowree abowt all the airorz in it. Some of you may like it, most of you probably won't, but you can kiss my rat ass! RAR! *Slaps it!* Really though, I hope you like it! Enjoy! =^.^=
Yorick woke in a daze. He hadn't slept well. He never slept well. Propping himself up on his elbows, he turned and looked at the glowing numbers of the clock on his bedside table. 6:48 am. The rat groaned and swung his legs over the side of the bed, sitting upright and rubbing his eyes groggily.
"I have got to stop drinking." He grumbled, rubbing a paw against his forehead in a futile attempt to "drive away" the throbbing in his temples. He hauled himself to his feet, letting his tail fall lazily to the floor with a loud thump as it hit the carpet. Not even bothering to put on his boxers, the rat wandered clumsily to the kitchen, swaggering into the hallway walls and bringing down pictures as he did so.
"Ow FUCK!" Yorick slammed the fridge door closed immeidiately, stumbling backwards, as soon as the light hit his eyes. "Fucking cocksucking fuck!" He rubbed his eyes angrily, until he'd recovered from the attack. The rat approached his new found enemy once more, glaring at the appliance like a nun glares at a hooker. "So it's a fight you want?" Squeezing his eyes shut, Yorick pulled the fridge door open once more in a frenzy, thrusting a paw into it and grabbing the first carton he touched. He, pulled back, slammed the door, opened his eyes and smilied haughtily, patting the carton of OJ in triumph before turning back to the fridge. "That'll teach you to have a lightbulb, bastard." With that, he sauntered off, nose in the air, on a new quest for aspirin.
Yorick sighed happily as his headache began to subside, having waited patiently for twenty minutes while the pain killers took effect. He got up from his bed and opened the window, breathing in the scent of rain and pastries from the bakery across the street. He turned and loped back over to his santuary, flopping onto his bed with a grunt, and rolling over to stare at the ceiling fan high above him. "I'm bored." Pause. "Which is why I'm talking to a ceiling fan." He grumbled and began trying to think of things to do, absentmindedly letting his paw creep down his stomach before resting on his sheath. He grinned. Why hadn't he thought of that sooner?
The rat grunted softly as he began to tease his length from it's sheath, his cock hardening quickly as he stroked himself. He continued to tease his erection for a while, sliding his fingertips up and down the underside of the shaft, rubbing his sensative cumslit which had begun to leak pre onto his hands, lubricating his strokes. He gripped his member firmly around the base and began sliding his paw up and down, moaning ocassionally and squeezing his balls. His tongue hung out of his maw as a stupid grin creeped it's way onto his muzzle.
He heard a thump over by the window and sat upright quickly, his ears swiveling in all directions, his eyes trying to locate what had made the noise. Nothing. He shrugged and looked down at his dick which was now bouncing along to to beat of his heart. He gripped it tightly once more, closing his eyes and imagining a cute little mouse sucking him off, whiskers twitching excitedly, her pussy dripping arousal down the inside of her thighs as she played with herself...
Something brushed his tail.
Yorick leapt to his feet with a yelp. "WHO THE FUCK IS IN HERE!?" he bellowed. No answer. His painfully hard cock dribbled pre onto the carpet and he whimpered. Why could he never have a nice peaceful wank? He froze. Something was creeping out from under his bed, towards the small puddle on the carpet. It was a pale olive green, with no eyes or nose or... any other distinguishing features really. He stood gaping at it, trying to figure out what it could be. The rat wrinkled his nose in disgust as the thing began burrying it's tip into the damp spot on the carpet. "Ok... so there's a slug after my man juice." He turned and grabbed his knife off the bedside table. It was too big to squish, and he certainly wasn't going to touch it.
Yorick turned back to face the thing, a malicious grin on his muzzle. "Now then-huh?" It was gone. He scratched his head, puzzled, and looked around. Only one place it could have gone. He got down on his knees and peeked under the bed. Some beer bottles, porn magazine, the remnants of what might have once been a sandwich... no creature. He sensed something move behind him and turned. "Oh... shit..."
The thing had raised itself up like a cobra ready to strike. Yorick shook slightly, but he kept a tight hold on his knife as he stood slowly. The creature swayed a good foot above him as he stared at it in fear and confusion. Something else brushed his ankle and he looked down. "Another one?!" The thing poised for attack took it's opportunity and lunged forward toward's the rat's crotch. "AHHH WHA!?" Yorick leapt sideways and fell to the floor with a loud "WHUMP" as the creature holding his ankle tightened it's grip. The rat rolled onto his back, propping himself up on his elbows, his still erect cock slapping against his stomach. The tentacle that had lunged at him now gripped his other ankle as the two creatures began to creep up his legs slowly. Yorick felt something press against his left arm and turned to find two more tentacles, one attempting to wrap around his wrist, the other sliding up onto his chest. He almost felt guilty for a moment as he squeezed the handle of his knife. Maybe they meant no harm?
The tentacles on his legs reached his inner thighs. "Uh... Ok, that's far enough... er... guys?" No luck. One of them began to prod at his tailhole. Yorick went to move his legs and the creatures tightened their grip. He ground his teeth together, clenching his fists. The tentacle on his chest was heading for his other arm, it's partner held his left one tight, the first still wiggling against his clenched anus, trying to gain entry, the other between his legs heading for his erection. "Alright. You wanna play?" He raised his free arm. "Let's play."
He thrust downwards with his knife, aiming for the tentacle wrapped around his arm, driving the blade of his knife into the creature, just far enough as not to pierce himself. It squelched disgustingly and the tentacle loosened, squealing and wiggling around like a worm on a hook. Yorick winced as he saw dark greenish fluid seeping out of the wound and onto the floor. He sat up, sending the tentacle on his chest flying across the room. The two creatures between his legs raised themselves up in alarm. Yorick took their heads, or at least what he thought to be their heads, off with one quick swipe, splattering his chest with the green blood. He shuddered as they too began squealing and writhing on the floor, but grinned triumphantly despite the noise. "I am the creepy-slug-thing NINJA!"
Yorick scrambled to his feet, the green blood of the tentacles dripping down his knife and onto his hand. He stepped over the wiggling bodies on the floor, scoping the room for the fourth tentacle. He gagged as the smell of the blood hit his nostrils. It smelled almost like a combination of dead bugs and sweat. "Oi!" He looked down. The fourth tentacle was back and nuzzling his scrotum. The rat squirmed in a mixture of pleasure and disgust. "Oh I like you. Jokes. Sorry, pal. But no." SQUELCH.
Yorick let his knife fall to the floor before hurrying out of his bedroom, quickly closing the door behind him. He squirmed all the way to bathroom, rubbing his paws up and down his body. "Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew!" He washed the blood thouroughly from his body before leaning against the sink and shaking his head. "Weird fucking da-UHN!" He tensed as a pressure suddenly welled up in his crotch, causing him to whimper in pain and curse under his breath.
BLUE BALLS!!!!!!OMFGROFLtesticles.
Wheee! Wasn't that fun?!
So now you know how I feel about tentacles, and yes, I will ocassionally fight my kitchen appliances or talk to random inanimate objects throughout my flat. Hope you enjoyed the story! :3