Dangers of Amateur Horticulture

Story by Thornbrier on SoFurry

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#1 of Works in Progress

Wrote this crazy piece in response to a very weird idea presented on FA. I got wondering what would happen if a Chakat encountered this particular fungus and ran with it. This also ties into Chakat ThornBrier's blog, starting almost immediately after the events shi described.

Even though this is in WIP I'm not sure I will ever come back to it. Maybe if it gets a good enough response, but I doubt I played well enough upon the various fetishes to get it.

Anyway, would love to hear what you guys have to say.


"Seong Hung-jul!" the canines voice barked down the hall. The black and calico chakat froze in place, hir silver tail flicking in annoyance along with hir ears. Shi sat hir hindquarters in the hall waiting for hir boss to approach. His many commendation medals jingled on his chest in time with the clink of his military boots upon the floor. Shi tugged at the bottom of hir dress coat uniform and sleeves ensuring it was in proper order as hi rounded hir form and looked down his muzzle at hir.

"Shir Seong, what was that? They are very important guests here. What do you have to say for yourself?"

"I apologize, Sir. I take all the blame for what happened." Any chakat would have felt hir anger and frustration, but shi was masterful at hiding most of the visual signs. "I was unprepared for the intensity of hir empathic transmission. It stunned me into inaction and I faltered." Hir head bowed before hir superior shi kept flicking hir red thumb in and out of the black fingers of hir left hand. "I will train harder on Empathic Blocking, Sir."

"See that you do, our governments contracts with companies like AP&R are all that is keeping our country profitable. You blow this and it will not just be your hide I skin before the Generals strip me of my rank. Oh, and make sure you get your brain scanned. I want to know if shi probed anything from your mind."

"Sir, a scan? Hir file shows nothing about that level of telepathy. An unregistered T5 with empathic static like that would be,..."

"Exactly what the enemy would send us disguised as a celebrity," he interrupted hir. "You will get the scan, I want the results before they attempt to leave the facility."

As he walked away shi clenched hir fists hard, hir claws subconsciously extended and tapped on the floor from hir four feet. Knowing how much trouble shi would be in if shi hit a superior officer shi channeled hir rage and slammed the wall as strong as hir mind could hit it, hir sapphire eyes flaring yellow momentarily. The force was barely enough to make a sound, but it was therapeutic at least.

Shi proceeded to hir room, using hir wrist computer to schedule a brain scan with the base's psy-therapist. Shi had just finished fitting it into hir calendar when hir door opened before hir. Upon hir couch bounced a large bunny, its massive cock and breasts flopping with each hop on the furniture.

"Go, go go, YEAH!!! HEADSHOT!!!" Hung-jul walked around the couch avoiding getting in the way of hir mate watching the Arena playoffs on the big screen wall, again. The bouncing bunny herm calmed down, flopping into the cushions as the winning teams gathered on the victory platforms for their various matches. "Hi honey, welcome home. Kitty's in the sink getting ready for our hike.

A green haired white chakat showed up on the screen as reporters asked hir questions. Hung-jul raised an eye at the chakat's voice before pausing the vid. "I met hir today. Well, met is the wrong phrase."

"No way, you met ThornBrier Ashworth? I mean, I know this military hotel gets lots of high profile visitors, but.... You know the Flying Tigers went on to take this whole championship." Shi waved a hand indicating the display on the wall. "I LOVED their matches, well, ok, a couple of them were so one sided it wasn't fun, but shi sure knows how to manage hir team, and I don't think I've seen a sniper as good as Tombion in years. The two of them could make any team great."

"Well, apparently Ashworth Power and Research is making a deal with the new Vietnamese government and their using this stop of the teams Worlds Tour to hold a photo-op of the deal. In a couple of hours ThornBrier and hir creepy arms will be jetting up the side of the tower and emerge to crowds of fans at the north lip of the cave. Autographs, weapons demonstrations, the whole nine lives. Oh no, no nonono, don't give me those... large... lapin eyes of yours. Ok, ok, you can go."

As the bunny lept to hir feet from kneeling before hir mate shi sprang for the door. Hung-jul gave a mock cough to get hir attention, "Uh, Dawping, pants, and a shirt. Most of the people up there will be humans. And don't forget your security badge this time, I don't want to have to ring you in again, and I won't be able to till after me and Kitty get back."

Dawping smiled sheepishly, "Sorry, Pal." Shi grabbed the clothes off of the hat rack and started bounding blindly down the halls as shi pulled on the shirt.

Hung-jul walked into the bathroom where shi found the sink half full of water, a little black and white mouse brushing herself with a broken toothbrush stood under the slow stream of the faucet. Hung-jul, with a hungry gleam in hir glowing eyes, scooped up the mouse and carried her up to hir mouth as she protested, "Nonononono!" As shi licked the little morsel's fur shi cringed.

"Blech, what is that? Hand soap?"

"That's what I was trying to tell you Pal. The quartermaster still hasn't granted my request to restock my strawberry flavored shampoo and I ran out yesterday. Ppalgang, why did we have to move here? This base sucks. Everyone's so mean, and its so much higher security."

Shi nuzzled the little mouse to hir cheek, "Oh my dear Kitty, it's not everyone, it's just the High Commander. He's so full of himself, and I think he's scared of loosing this post because he's the last remaining officer from the old regime who didn't fight for the new government. He has such a stick up his ass to. You know today he threatened to make bunny stew and have a mouse snack if I screwed up, and all I did was stammer at a quest when shi hugged me. But don't you worry hun, I'll have this place straightened up before the year is out. The Generals will hear about the High Commander. And I'll talk with the quartermaster tomorrow about your shampoo..., and getting you a proper mousemorph brush. Creators, this stuff tastes awful on you."

"Ok, hun," she said as she scritched her mates muzzle. "Did you find any good places for our hike around here?"

"Yeah, I used some of the surveillance drones to scout out the ridge. Looks like there are some old trails villagers used to use. There's a rundown shrine on the southern lip I thought we could use as a place to store our gear for future hikes. Though, I suppose we'll need to pack lighter today than I expected. Dawping isn't coming with us today. Shi's off to see that crazy four armed chakat from hir sports show give a live performance above the hotel, so it'll just be you and me exploring today, like old times."

"What? Shi said I could ride in hir cock for the hike. Haven't gotten to do that outside of this room since we got here, and I taste terrible right now, so I can't ride in your mouth."

"Well, I always enjoy you in my penis," the chakat said as hir sheath firmed up.

"I know Pal, but your's isn't at a good angle for watching the scenery as you walk. Besides, you can't keep it out of the sheath unless I keep you aroused the whole hike. No, wear your old harness, the one with the cellphone pocket, I'll ride there."

"I have to wear my uniform, even off duty. We could run into lost people who came from the show. Oh, and I think that harness was in the luggage that hasn't arrived yet. Perhaps you could ride between my breasts?"

"No offense hun, but they're not that big. Especially in your uniform, I'd be crushed up against that starchy fabric, and I hate starchy fabric. I'll just ride on your head."

Shi put Kathrine back down into the sink and wiped hir hands on a towel shi grabbed with a fore-paw. "'K, Kitty, you finish cleaning up. I'm gunna take some stims so I can stay awake for this hike, and I suppose I need to move some stuff from Dawping's backpack to mine. Shi did pack the bags, right?"

As the mouse gave a nod shi picked up hir brush and returned to hir shower.

* * *

The felitaur walked through the woods in hir short sleeve uniform shirt showing off more of the bright red stripe that circled up from hir left hand in stark contrast to the otherwise black fur of hir forward body. Perched in hir silver hair Kitty looked around at all the trees and flowers trying to spot which ones she wanted to take samples of for cataloging and which she just wanted to make into a crown for Pal.

"New plant at 4 o'clock," the mouse let out excitedly. "I think it's a mutation of the Tanzanian Pear vine. Wonder how that got out here." She skittered down the chakat's back and opened the left flank-puch shi was wearing. "Up we go."

With a smile Ppalgang lifted the sample jar from the pouch with hir little mate on top of it. Holding it up to the plant shi unsealed it and levitated the mouse the extra few inches needed to reach the vine. Floating next to it, she cut with her miniature laser knife, severing one of the pears and a bit of the vine proper. Lighting back upon the container she stamped down on the lid just to be sure the seal was good.

The chakat gave a swat at Kitty with hir silver tail's red tip as she scurried across hir brown mid body. "I was just thinking back when we met in Seoul, you sitting on the edge of my glass in that sexy little yellow dress,...."

Kitty tugged on hir ear, "If you keep going with that story and call me a Pikachu again I swear, I will bite your ear. Jokes like that are exactly why I left the electrical engineer's corps and went into programming."

"You said it, not me. And I was just thinking of how long we've been together. Seven years I've loved you, five we've been mates, and Dawping joined us three years ago." Kitty and Dawping both felt a wave of lust emanate from their feline mate through their empathic link. Dawping sent back hir approval at what hir mates were likely to be doing soon, but shut off hir side so shi could focus on the event shi was attending. "You're so cute, my little Kitty. I just, I wish I could give you cubs, share that with you."

Kitty climbed out onto Ppalgang's nose with a look of concern. Hir mate was crying, yet shi could still feel the lust and could even now smell the musk of hir cock slipping from hir sheath below hir. "Pal, what's wrong? Honey? Look me in the eyes, talk to me girl, what's wrong?"

Ppalgang's eyes couldn't seem to focus on hir love at the end of hir nose. Shi sat down, breathing heavily, and reached back with a fore-paw to stroke hir member. Hir hands came up to hir petite breasts unbuttoning hir shirt, the stiff blue fabric falling away from hir chest as shi arched hir upper back over the lower. Hir sample harness getting in the way, shi unfastened it along with hir gun holster.

Hir paw not satisfying hir needs shi ran off naked into the jungle, hir mate hanging desperately to the bridge of hir nose crying out, "Talk to me, say anything, please, just talk to me!" But shi wasn't registering her presence, let alone her words. It didn't take long for hir to find the patch of jungle shi had been sniffing out, hir excellent nose had lead hir right to it.

The scent was fantastic, shi could smell that its source would sate hir needs. Looking about shi saw several different plants but it wasn't until shi moved away a few large leaves that shi found the fungus shi was after.

Kitty saw what was in hir hands and yelled out, "NOOOOO! That's a vagishroom! Don't use that, it'll infect you. I thought you chakats were resistant to drugs, but its... shit, its not drugs, its pheromones, and you have super sensitive noses and sex drives like no other. No wonder you can't hear me."

As Ppalgang moved the shroom's opening toward hir cock Kitty scurried down her mates body. Climbing out to the tip of hir penis she pulled out hir laser knife and cut at the mushroom as it approached. With the tube cut into ribbons Ppalgang became frustrated in hir lust filled daze. Shi reached for more mushrooms, but each was unable to survive long enough to satisfy. Finally shi looked down at the source of the problem.

Hir eyes glowing yellow shi telekinetically pulled the laser knife from hir mates hands and thrust another mushroom down upon hir cock. Kitty stood upon the glans and tried to hold the fungus up. She slipped however, and hir foot entered her mates urethra. Seeing where things were going she took a deep breath and pulled her other foot in as well. Pal cried out in pleasure as shi inadvertently forced the mouse down hir shaft.

Shi pumped away at hir cock with the cavernous mushroom tube, working hirself quickly into a frenzy. It wasn't long before the fungus responded to the pre, extending its spike. With each stab into hir glans the shroom released its painkillers, spores, and more aphrodisiacs.

Kitty did her best to block the passage, but the pressure of the spores kept building up above her, and Pal was starting to force her down with hir fingers. It wasn't long before Kitty was farther down the shaft than she had ever been.

Kitty knew she wouldn't be able to last much longer, she needed to breath. She also knew Pal wouldn't be able to cum until the spores reached hir internal testes. <Forgive me, Pal,> she thought as she moved her body to allow some of the spores to pass.

Seconds later hir semenburst forth, pushing Kitty on the familiar ride up hir cock along with the vast majority of the spores. She feared what lay above, but fortunately the back pressure forced the spike out before her head arrived at the opening. Finally satisfied Ppalgang removed the tube and watched hir cum spilling out of hir manhood around hir mates stuck shoulders and breasts.

"Kitty, what are you doing in there?" Shi blinked, finally able to focus hir eyes.

Kitty coughed, trying to breath deep. "Vagishroom. It got ya. You..., it..., I tried to stop you. Stopped most of the spores, but you're infected." Pal plucked Kitty out of hir cock and held her soaked form in hir hands. Covered in this much cum shi looked almost like a lab mouse, hir normally black and grey extremities glistening white.

"This isn't good. Vagishrooms weren't designed to infect chakats. They've emptied your nutsacks and are going to grow the second stage spores. This will probably hurt, because they're going to increase the size of your testes quite a bit, and your's don't have anywhere to expand. I only hope I stopped enough of them that they won't expand too much. And I have no idea how your super immune system will handle this."

"How do you know so much about these?"

"Duh, I read the the 'Encyclopedia of Sexual Botany.' As such, I know how to treat it, at least in humans. We need to get back to our gear at the shrine. Shit, your GPS was in the pack."

"Yeah, where are the samples? And my gun? I can't go back into the base like this. And how's Dawping?"

"Damn straight you can't, you'd be humping every female we came across trying to spread the infection. Now come on, we need to get this taken care of before you start trying to jab that thing into me. As for Dawping, shi has no idea. Shi disconnected the link from hir end when shi thought we were about to make love. I'm sure shi didn't want to end up masterbating in public again."

* * *

Arriving at the shrine Pal was once again beginning to lose focus. The pressure in hir testes was growing intense. Not quite painful, but definitely uncomfortable. As things shifted shi felt pressure on hir bladder, which had already caused hir to stop once during the run back to the shrine. Shi laid down as hir head began to spin. "I don't feel so good."

"I know hun, just hold on a little longer." Kitty dug through the packs they had left. Finding the medkit she pried open the safety latches. "Kitty'll mix you up something to help."

Pal needed to fuck, but not just anything. Shi needed a warm vagina, with a womb. Shi tried to keep hir mind off of sex, but it just kept coming back up. Shi looked at hir mate, scampering across the bags and that desire to give her a cub came back with a vengeance, but shi knew it was impossible for so many reasons.

Opening hir lower legs shi looked down at hir flaccid shaft, which had refused to go back into its sheath since shi had come back to hir senses in the vagishroom patch. Just past it shi spied hir own slit, its moist lips so inviting. Before shi realized what shi was doing shi had bent hir cock back and was already thrusting it into hir own vagina.

Hir vaginal muscles massaged the few inches shi was able to force into hirself, hir paws working the exposed portion of the bent shaft. The combined feelings quickly drove hir over the edge and shi blew hir load into hirself before Kitty even had time to see what was going on. Once she realized what Pal had just done she smacked her forehead with her paw.

Kitty finished up mixing the concoction, poured it into a canteen and called her mate over. "Drink this. Combined with a week of heavy anti-histamines and iron supplements it will kill the spores in your testes and you should start producing semen again within a month. As for the load you just blew up your own vag..., you're stuck with that one until they mature and you can lay the pods. On the plus side, in two days your breasts will finally be nice big funbags, assuming they react like human breasts."

As shi put hir shirt back on shi noticed it was extremely tight across hir chest. It seemed the pods were already having an effect. "These things are dangerous. Tomorrow I'll use a drone and cut down that patch. Speaking of tomorrow, these don't show up on a brainscan do they? There is no way the High Commander can learn about this before I report him."

* * Seuss Inspired Ending * *

Narrator Voice: "And that day, Shir Seong's bust grew 3 sizes. Forever more shi would keep these lovely prizes."