Won't miss it 'till it's gone

Story by Aaron LonePaws on SoFurry

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#3 of Bonfire Blues

And here we see the elusive third chapter, in it's natural habitat ^.^

Sorry it took so long to get this up, but I've had some personal issues to take care of, so yeah...I'll explain all that later. For now, please enjoy, rate, comment; all the usual things you do that I do adore so much! ;)

Thanks for the patience and Chapter 4 is already in the works!


Jacob could slowly feel his body waking up. His lower body was numb, he couldn't feel a thing in his legs. His upper body, however, was a different story. His arms, chest and head ached with a dull, throbbing pain. Especially his head, his head felt like it was on fire.

A wave of nausea washed over him. He groaned as he felt his stomach shift, but there was nothing to throw up, so he just hacked and coughed.

He looked around, wondering where he was, and why it was so dark. The room was pitch black.

He could tell that he was lying in a medium size bed. He raised a paw and attempted to

feel for a wall. Instead, he encountered a small structure attached to the sides of the bed. He slid his paw across the smooth, plastic surface and wondered where he was.

He heard someone yelling something. They sounded very far away, and very agitated.

He heard a door opening. He looked in the direction of the sound, expecting to see light come pouring through an open doorway. Instead he saw the same inky blackness as before.

He heard two people approach him. A womans voice was saying something, trying to sooth him.

"It's okay Jacob, it's okay. You're safe now."

He tried to sit up, but a firm paw held him gently in place.

He looked around trying to find light, any source of light. This couldn't be happening, it must be a dream, a very bad dream.

"Where am I? What's going on?" His own voice sounded weak and frightened. "Why is it so dark? Is the power out?"

There was a pause. The silence thicker than a fog on a dark night. The two people in the room seemed to stand still for a second. Then a man spoke.

"You're in the hospital, you're safe."

The man paused.

"W-Why is it so dark." Jacob felt panic starting to well up in his chest. If the power was out, why wouldn't they have brought a flashlight? What kind of hospital doesn't have flashlights?

The man sighed sadly. Jacob felt another paw fall on his other shoulder, this one smaller than the first. More reassuring.

"Jacob....I'm so sorry....you're blind."

* * *

Jacob felt numb. He lay back, all of his emotions draining out of him. He didn't feel anything anymore it seemed like.

It had been three days. Three days of condolences, counseling, and bullshit.

He was so tired; so tired of the I'm so sorries, and the it'll be okays and the hundreds of people still have productive lives. He just wanted to be alone. The only problem with that was that damn intern. After it was clear that Jacob was stable the doctor and nurse who had at first been responsible for supplying his medical needs had been replaced by an intern named Radcliffe. Every time that Jacob finally got a few moments to himself, he would come out of the woodwork.

Not that is was very hard to sneak up on him right now.

He heard the door open, speak of the devil.

"Hey Jacob, How are you tonight?"

"How the fuck do you think I'm doing?"

"Hopefully better than yesterday." Damn this guy is insufferable.

There was a pause. Jacob could hear Radcliffe fidgeting as if he was uncomfortable. Good. Jacob had wanted to make this asshole uncomfortable.

"Jacob, you need to stop this."

What the hell?

"You can't just sit here feeling sorry for yourself forever. You've got a lot to be thankful for, and it's time you started showing it."

Thankful? Who the fuck does this guy think he is?

"What the fuck do I have to be thankful for?! In case you haven't fucking noticed, I'm fucking blind! I can't fucking see!" Jacob's voice was raising, but he didn't care. He was sick of this assholes condescending positivism. "I don't have a fucking future anymore, you prick, and you think I should be fucking grateful!? Who the fuck do you think you are asshole!?"

Jacob's voice cracked, all the rage and fear that had been building up in him for the past three days was finally finding an outlet. He sat up, pointing a finger at Radcliffes general direction.

"I have nothing to be fucking grateful for, you stupid bitch! Why the hell can't you just leave me the fuck alone! I'm sick of all your fucking happy go lucky shit. You don't know shit! Now will you just leave me the fuck alone!!"

Jacob flopped back, the rage was gone, leaving only fear and emptiness. He just wanted to disappear, to fade out of this living hell that his life had become.

Jacob thought that the outburst would finally make Radcliffe leave, but instead, he heard him pull a chair from the other side if the room next to the hospital bed.

Jacob just turned his head. Why wouldn't this guy take a hint?

"I'm sorry."

Jacob's ears perked. He turned his head back towards Radcliffe, curiosity and confusion overcoming his frustration with the intern.

"For what?"

"For coming across as such an insensitive dick." Jacob felt two smaller feline paws grasp his one of his own large wolf paws. "I don't mean to preach at you, Jacob, but you really are lucky to be alive."

Jacob rolled over so he was fully facing Radcliffe. He had never thought about the full extent of his injuries before. He felt Radcliffes feline paw lift off his hand and tap the side of his neck. He lifted his own paw and felt the spot Radcliffe had tapped. There was a huge scar on the side of his neck, just below where his jawline would be. Jacob grimaced.

"One of the bottles you had been holding didn't explode with the other two. When it did explode, a large shard cut your neck here." He tapped the scar again. "If it had cut you just a inch or so lower...you would have been dead before we got to the scene."

Jacob considered this silently for a few seconds. He had known that he had narrowly avoided death, but having it explained to him broad a new level of reality to it. He shivered, remembering the searing pain in his neck, his vision going blurry and slowly fading...fading forever.

He felt Radcliffe wrap an arm around him in a comforting embrace. It felt good. He tried to remember the last time he had felt this, at home, this comforted and accepted. He couldn't remember ever feeling so much compassion in a simple hug before.

"Are you okay, Jacob, I mean really okay?"

Jacob broke down. Heavy, gut-wrenching sobs racked his body as he buried his face into the interns shoulder.

"I'm just so fucking scared."

"I know, Jacob, I know."

Jacob cried for the first time in nine years. He cried into the shoulder of the first true friend he had made, for nine years.

It must have looked ridiculous. A large, muscular brown wolf crying like a baby, and burying his muzzle into neck of a small, slightly effeminate, cat.

But for the first time in nine years, Jacob didn't care.