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"I can't believe you hit him." Ivan said for the fifth time, the wolf rocking forward with a smile on his face, his arms wrapped around his knees. "I wish I could have seen it. God, I wish you had taped it!"

"I don't." I glared at my best friend, but the movement made my cheek muscles move, which in turn made my bruise ache so I relaxed my expression. "Has it been quiet over there?"

"Yeah, I've been listening. My old man said it was about time you took a stand." He tilted his head towards me. "You're welcome at our place, Dad said you can bunk in my room and to hell with your father."

"Thank you, but I can't. You know he'd just find a way to take it out on your family, or he'd be pounding at your door every time he was drunk." I lifted my head a bit, warmed by the offer none the less. I knew his father was just offering to tweak my Dad, but it was good to know the offer was on the table.

The wind was cool, the spring weather reverting back so that I was comfortable sitting outside with my feet in the grass. Ivan was sprawled out beside me, the wolf entirely content as he idly flipped through the pages of his workbook. We could have been inside the library working, but he had wanted to come out and away from the crowd. He was still tickled about what had happened, trying to get me to tell the story despite my attempts to evade it. He didn't know the entire truth, Ollie did, but the dingo had kept quiet as I'd told him. Something I was entirely grateful for. I had half expected him to go against my wishes and talk to the police, or to tell someone else, a teacher, a counselor, but he'd been quiet. I don't know why I didn't just let him, but I felt ashamed, humiliated, I had been through this before. Nothing really changed in the end, they'd just come by, watch, and afterward write up a notation. It had all been done before, repeatedly.

I'd had a few teachers look askance at my hand, the knuckles were swollen and bruised, I was half afraid that something had been broken. In the end, I'd just wrapped them up with tape from the locker room and hoped for the best. If they were broken, it wasn't like I had the money to get them taken care of. And I could still wiggle my fingers, it just took a bit more effort and ached horribly when I did it. I managed to write alright, but it was certainly sloppy. My face had grown swollen the day after, my eye partially closed, but it was starting to improve, not a lot, but it really was getting a bit better. In a few more days no one would see the bruise under my fur or what he'd done to me. Ivan wasn't purposefully ignoring those hurts, he was just so damn happy that I had hit my father. He was the only one, it hadn't made me feel stronger or better or braver, I just felt sick. It was too much like him striking out like that. I didn't want to be like him at all. Not even to defend myself.

"So where have you been staying?" Ivan nudged me with one foot paw. "You aren't staying with Ollie, you got family you can bunk up with?"

"Not really." I flushed a bit and tilted my head down in embarrassment. "I'm out at the old fort, I figured it's safe enough there and I can shower here in the locker room?"

"Seriously?!" Ivan jerked up and glared at me. "That place is a death trap."

"Better than other options." I shrugged a little and tried to dismiss the worry on his face. The fort was an old clubhouse that we had played in as cubs, it used to be quite nice when were younger, but not anymore.

It was tucked away at the edge of a park in our neighborhood, it was the sort of area that people did drug deals in or hung out in after dark. It wasn't safe, I knew that, when I first went there I had seen signs people had been hanging out there, squatting or doing drugs. I'd found a small room that was relatively safe and stayed there, the only clothing I had on me was what was in the school, but Jonty had helped me out there. He'd brought me a bag of stuff from our room, mostly clothes and some other stuff, and food as well. I saw my mother's hand in that, and for a moment I'd felt angry, outraged that she hadn't come herself. She should have at least come to see that I was alright, but she had sent Jonty. Each day he brought two lunches, her way of sneaking around our father to feed me, but it still felt like I was being abandoned for the monster. She hadn't tried to contact me, though she knew when I'd be at school, it made me question so much about her. I wish I could know what was going on in her head about the matter.

I didn't know what she thought, Jonty hadn't asked her really, he was enough like our father that he dismissed her most of the time. Most male lions behaved that way, like the female of the species was lacking in some way. He said enough about our father that my stomach turned, he had gone out the day I'd hit him, he'd not come back until the next day and still drunk in the care of one of his friends. His snarling rants had been filled with slurs and threats, enough that I was grateful I hadn't tried to go back myself. I still didn't know how I felt about the matter, I felt sick to my stomach every time I thought about what I'd done. I'd always thought that Jonty was the one that was more like our father, in temperament and looks. Now I truly had to wonder how much of him was in me.

"You're coming home with me tonight, you're not staying there." Ivan jabbed a finger at my side. "You're going to get stabbed! You know the hyena pack hangs out there and they will seriously mess you up if they find you."

"They won't, there's a part of the interior that caved in, I was able to get through and it's safe enough." I muttered. "I'm not dragging my Dad's shit onto your house."

I don't want him to touch me that way again. The other part of his mind shied away from that thought, trying to block it. He didn't want to linger too long on what had happened there. It made him sick to think about it.

"You are, I'm not letting you get hurt." Ivan set his ears back, the fur along his ruff lifting slightly. "We'll find a way to hide you, but unless you have a better place to say, one I will personally verify, you are staying with us."

"I can't." Panic threatened to rise up. I didn't want to be near my father, anywhere near him. He could easily just stop me on the way to school one morning or break in or, who knew what he'd do if he were hung over and angry.

I tried my best to think of another place I could stay. Ollie had offered, but it had been a knee jerk offer, one that I knew couldn't be there for long. His parents were good people, but I also knew that his step father was a bit tetchy about lions. It was specist, but a lot of people were, and our two species' had spent a long time beating the shit out of each other in the old days. I could call one of my aunts, try and stay with them, but it was touch and go on how well that would work. They might let me stay with them, but chances were that they'd send me back home or report me, they didn't like my father, but they respected him. They cared about my mother. I didn't have many friends, at least none I would be confident enough to ask to stay with and their parents would only have a lot of questions about why I didn't want to go home and what had happened.

Except, I knew one person that didn't live with their parents, they knew about what was going on at home. The thought crept up slowly and I almost reached back for my wallet. CJ knew that my Dad was abusing me, he'd all but said it, he'd offered to talk with me and sort things out. But this went well beyond just talking to him about my problems, I barely even knew him that well. I moved my paw up to push back the edge of my mane. He would probably say no, it was really too much to ask, I knew he lived with his boyfriend, so they had their own place. I glanced up to find Ivan giving me a look, his ears set, tail flicked up slightly, entirely stubborn enough to try and drag me home with him. It couldn't hurt to ask, he might be okay with it. It would be away from my father at least.

"Can I borrow your phone for a minute?" I reached back to pull out my wallet, trying to brace myself as best as I could for what I was about to do. "I might be able to find someone that can help me. I mean, I hope so.."

"If not, you're coming home with me tonight." Ivan pushed his phone into my hand, his expression unyielding.

~ ~ * ~ ~

The rat lived in a surprisingly nice apartment building. It was an old home that had been remodeled into four apartments and he had claimed the bottom floor for himself and his partner. It wasn't new, it had a worn appearance, but still held a regal air to it with sweeping towers for the roof tops and a wraparound porch that boasted columns that had carvings that must have been beautiful back when they were new. Now they looked worn away from many hands touching them over time, weather, and other natural forces. It was large, though, very large, and imposing as I stepped up onto the porch and stared at 2033 B, feeling embarrassed and nervous before ringing the doorbell. CJ hadn't said no, in fact he'd been outraged at what had happened, despite the fact I'd given abbreviated events. He'd been welcoming, giving me the address and Ivan had dropped me off to ensure I was 'telling the truth'. The wolf wasn't going to put up with me sleeping outside another night, he'd been more than horrified when I'd gotten my stuff out of our old fort.

"What the fuck did he do to ya?!" CJ's first words were barely contained fury as he opened the door, look at me with dark eyes narrowed. "You okay?"

"Yeah.. I'm fine, it was a few days ago." I shifted my bag a little as the rat looked me over, the heat going to my cheeks as he looked me up and down as if he were sizing me up.

He stepped back after a moment and made room for me to walk by him, his tail lashing back and forth behind him as he did so. For the first time I saw him without a shirt on, he was only wearing a set of large black pants, sort of gothy ones with chains hanging from the many pockets that decorated the sides of the pants legs. He was dyed blue all along his upper body, the white fur was even dyed blue here, but a paler color than his back and sides. The fur was shaved along part of his chest, or rather, it didn't grow, but it was done on purpose. There was a burned mark in the shape of a stylized sun right around one of his nipples where no fur grew, just pink shiny flesh showing through. His nipples were both pierced with silver rings that caught the light as he gestured to me to get all the way in so he could shut the door. I don't know why, but the pierced nipples shocked me more than the tattoo did.

The living room was clean and neat, not at all what I expected from the punkish rat. I'd always imagined black lights and rock posters, but it was all white. The couch was a soft cream colored leather, there was a throw rug that was a soft beige color on the white carpet and the furniture was a soft pale walnut. And, blessedly, there was AC on and kicking, making my mane flutter slightly as the heat from outside was gone entirely. I wiped my paws on the mat in front of the door, conscious of my shabby clothes, my worn bag, this wasn't a place for someone shabby looking. I might have been humiliated save for the fact that CJ didn't really fit into the layout either, his blue colors and piercings made him stand out, but comfortably so.

"How bad?" He reached out to take my bag, and in doing so caught my hand in his, lifting it up with a frown. "Didja go to the hospital?"

"No! No it's not that bad.." I pulled my hand away, splaying my ears. "He just roughed me up a bit, and I lost it. I can't go back home. I just need some crash space, I mean not forever, just a night or two at most."

"Shit, Shall, I ain't gonna throw you out." He let me pull my hand back and twitched his whiskers forward. "Listen, if you want to crash, we've got couch space. Just make yerself at home. Stefan went to go get some groceries, figured ya don't wanna eat greens, eh?"

"You didn't have to do that!" I lifted my head a bit. "I have some money, I can pay for-"

"Heh, hell no. I know how much ya make." CJ bared his long teeth in a grin before winking. "I'm always eatin' rabbit grub here, gotta take the excuse to have something tastier in the house for once. I get tired always eating the stuff Stefan likes."

"Oh, okay." I glanced at the couch and dropped down on it carefully, curling my tail along my hip as I did so. "I really am sorr-"

"Hell, don't mention it, like I said." He gave a little wave of a paw. "Did you talk to the police? You should turn the bastard in."

"No, they don't do anything really. They don't wanna split up a family." I murmured, watching as he moved around in front of me, trying not to flinch when he moved in front of me and reached down to lift my chin up so he could look at my injuries.

The rat carefully ran a finger along my cheek, not hurting me, but probing just enough to make me flinch as he frowned and kept my head tilted to one side. I wanted to pull away, instinct made me want to hide it from him, but I held still as he touched briefly right along my bottom lip. His touch was deliberately gentle, careful as he brushed away the fur, but his eyes were bright with anger. I knew it looked worse than it really was, bruising always made it look awful even if there was no other damage. When I was little and he hurt me I had always been terrified of the marks left on me, they looked awful even beneath the fur, but time had taught me how to gauge how hurt I was. He reached for my hand next and I let him, too tired to care, it had been days since I'd had any real sleep. At some point, the mind just went numb to anything more.

He undid the bandage, crouching down in front of me so that he could see my swollen knuckles, they were even worse looking now. They weren't as swollen as they had been, but the bruising showed beneath the pale fur, the skin stretched taut enough that it was patchy looking. I was pretty sure they weren't broken, but CJ hissed in sympathy while he turned my hand over and cupped it in his paws. They were so weird looking, there was no fur on them, just smooth pink skin with long thin fingers. I know people at work always made sure not to touch them, or want him to make their drinks, but they didn't bother me. They were gentle, running a finger along the tip of one of my finger pads and back down to the joint.

"I'm going to get some ice for this, maybe take down some of the swelling and have Stefan look. If he thinks it's broke we're going to go to the urgent care." He nodded his head, the ring on his nose and ear jingling slightly.

"I can't-" I started to protest and he stood up with a graceful movement and shook his head.

"Yes, you can. Listen, you're not the first kid to end up in a bad way." He paused and hesitated a touch. "Did you come out to your father? Is that why he got upset?"

"No." I answered shortly and twitched my ears back. CJ didn't press, instead he patted my shoulder again and padded into the next room, but still easily within hearing distance as I heard the telltale sound of a freezer door opening and shutting. "He's always thought I was gay. That's nothing new at all."

"Why?" CJ returned, wrapping a clean white kitchen towel around an electric blue ice pack, offering it to me. As soon as I took it he dropped down on the couch as comfortable as any cat. "I mean, why does he think you're gay?"

"Just... because of how I look." I took the packet and placed it on my knuckles, feeling the chill slowly seeping through the layer of the kitchen towel. "I sure as hell have nothing on Jonty."

"There's nothing wrong with the way you look, Shall." He shifted next to me, his ears twitched backwards a touch. "And you can't just pick someone out as gay because they look one way or another. Hell, you should see some of the guys down in the clubs, they're far more masculine than you'd think. This caribou for instance, bastard is large enough to send me through a wall without blinking. And lookin' one way don't mean yer gay. Just how it all works out."

"I hate the way I look." I spoke softly and stared down at my paws, ears flicked backwards. The cold felt good on my knuckle, easing some of the ache in it.

"You'd rather be like Jonty? I've seen your brother, now there's a bit of a brute, no offense." CJ reached out to pat my shoulder lightly. "Not every guy has to look like a mountain of a male. You lions just have it hard on that end, too much testosterone and posing going on. If you're gay, or really prefer guys, at least you won't have to put up with a lioness who wants someone like your brother. Hell or even the same species. Look at me, I got a rabbit! Not like anyone expects us to try and pop out a pup or two."

"I'm not gay." I sighed a little and tried not to let my frustration com through when I said it, but it did. Why did they have to just assume I was gay? I'd never given that impression to anyone in my life on purpose. The hand on my shoulder squeezed gently. "I just look..." I trailed off, I didn't even know how to finish that sentence.

"Alright, I know I promised we'd talk about it, but we don't have too now. I'm just saying, there's nothin' wrong with the way ya look, mate." CJ shifted closer and his arm wrapped along my back in a half hug. "And if you like guys and girls, or cars, I don't give a shit. That's your business. Just don't think because you look one way it means anything, looks are just all packaging."

That was it, that simple phrase. There was nothing wrong with the way I looked? There was everything wrong with the way I looked. I lifted my head and pulled back slightly, staring into his honest eyes as he let his hand slide away to give me space. He was always so confident, always so calm about who he was and how he looked. He never seemed bothered with anything at all, how could he know there was nothing wrong with the way I looked?

It built up, the thoughts that had ran rough shod over every moment of my day. I wasn't a boy, I wasn't a girl, I was something that had been made under a knife and the pills my mother had fed me from the time I was little. Everything I knew about my identity had been a lie. I hated my body, I hated it, everything about it was feeling more and more wrong the harder I thought about what I'd found out. It had always felt wrong, like stuffing myself into a shirt that had fit only last year, but now was too tight. No, not even like that, it was like grabbing one of my father's pants by mistake, they didn't fit right, didn't smell right, I could wear them, but everything about them chafed and hung too loose in all the wrong places. My body wasn't mine, it had never really been mine. It was something I had grown into, struggling to push myself into the mold I had been gifted with, but how could it ever really be me?

"There's everything wrong with the way I look." I spoke softly, truthfully, and even speaking them they seemed to sting my tongue. Needles that pricked and burn, that ran down my throat to stab at the ball of emotions that I had throttled down into the dark. "It's all wrong, that's the fucking problem." Anger, humiliation, fear, they all built up as CJ blinked at me.

"Every kid feels that way, you know. I did too when I was little. Hated bein' a rat, hated bein' too thin or too tall-" He tried to sound sympathetic, understanding, and I knew he was, but he didn't understand. Not really, not the way I felt.

"No!" I felt the weight building in my chest and throat. "You don't understand, it's all twisted up! It's all broken and wrong! That is my fucking problem! This isn't me!"

The last word came out higher pitched and CJ tensed up slightly, but he didn't move away, he moved in closer until I could feel him like a line of warmth against my side. His arm held me, draped along my back and squeezing. I wanted to shove him away, I wanted to snarl and some dark part of me roiled to do just that. To drive him back, keep him away from my secret and my pain. I nearly choked stopping myself, keeping still as his warm pressed against me. He didn't try to ask why I was wrong, he didn't speak. If he had spoken I would have stopped talking right there, I would have known that I was exposing my secrets out into the open. It was the silence, the only sound the hum of the AC and my own breathing that was started to come faster. It was a waiting silence that drew what any question would have silenced.

"I should have never been born a boy." I spoke softly, tonelessly, I couldn't put emotions into it, just the words alone as I felt CJ go very still beside me. "I'm all wrong. I don't feel like a boy, I never do. It just feels off... just not... right."

There was a moment of silence, it felt like forever as I stared at the floor, I didn't dare look at the rat, I didn't want to see the horror or confusion or disgust or anything else on his face. No emotions were there, I felt numb as I spoke, too tired to feel, but I could feel wetness rolling down the curves of my cheeks. I was crying, I didn't feel like I was crying, but they were there. I didn't even know what they were for, only that I didn't want to look inside of myself or at CJ. Someone heard my secret, a secret so terrible even my own mother had cut it out of me and changed it. How could a stranger accept it? Tears ran downwards as I pulled my ears back, ready to feel CJ draw away and tell me to leave. And why wouldn't he? I was a freak.

"You mean you think you should have been born a female?" He spoke softly, his accent clearing as if he were trying to make sure I understood what he was saying.

"Yes.." The word came out in a whisper and I closed my eyes, another tear rolling down my cheek. I was a freak, I was all wrong inside and on the outside. "I wasn't supposed to be this way... I don't think it.. I know it."

His hand slid from my shoulders, his body moved, he was pulling away. Just like I knew he was going to do, he just had to be clear what I was saying. The tears were coming faster, I couldn't stop them, the numbness that had briefly covered me fell away and I tried to stop a noise from coming out as he stood up from the couch. He'd throw me out now, or tell me why I was wrong in thinking that, maybe nicely, maybe he'd try to be a friend about it instead of just yelling. Even if I told him more, how I'd been born, he'd agree with what had been done to me. He'd defend my parents choice, tell me to man up, to try harder. I'd bared a part of my soul to him, I didn't know why, it was just a weight hanging on me and I wanted it gone. I didn't feel relieved or comforted, I didn't feel anything but dread as CJ leaned over me and I instantly flinched back, afraid of being struck.

"Oh Shall, lovey, there's nothin' wrong about ya." CJ murmured softly before his arms slipped around me as he moved right in front, leaning down and pulling so he could drag me up from the couch. "Not a thing, easy, mate. It's okay."

His voice was strange and soft, his arms slid around me softly as I stood up and nearly cracked him on the chin as I did so too fast. A choked sob escaped my throat as he pulled me in close and I found my head burrowed against his bare blue shoulder, the ice pack forgotten as he held me. His arms were so thin, but strong as a shuddering sob ran through my body and I reached around to hold him as I did so. It didn't matter that I didn't know him well, it was only the soft murmur of words I didn't understand in my ear, but the tone was gentle as he let me cling to him. I dug my hands in tightly and sobbed out, great racking sobs that shuddered through me while he tilted his head to press his cheek against my own.

For the first time in ten years, someone held me as I cried, his arms felt amazingly strong as his hands stroked my back and his chest vibrated as he spoke. It wasn't in a language I understood, it was a soft melodic language that meant absolutely nothing to me, but at that moment it was my entire world as my tears rolled into his fur. I cried because I was wrong, because I wasn't what I was born to be, I cried because of my father's vile words and touches, I cried for every slap and punch he had ever delivered for me. I cried for things that were buried and hidden in my mind. I cried because for the first time in forever someone held me, someone cared, someone didn't try to shush me for fear someone else would hear or snarl at me for being a child. He held me because I needed it, his voice softly soothing, but not trying to stop the stem of tears. It let loose the hurt and anger, the fear and confusion, and it felt so good, so right to let it go.

At some point he moved me to the couch, letting me lie down so that I was pressed against his chest trying to choke out what I felt. The words didn't come out clearly, gasped and sobbed out, it didn't matter what they said. I cried until there were no more tears to cry, I cried until his fur was wet and I was trembling and exhausted. I don't know when they finally stopped and I was left shaking against him and heard only the soft murmured words and my name occasionally. There was a place inside me, a place I never really looked, a place I shoved every damned emotion I had ever felt down into when it all became too much. Jealousy, all the times my father had chosen to take Jonty somewhere instead of me, presented Jonty to his friends, encouraged him and praised him. Humiliation, all the times I had been snarled at for some small thing, for wanting to play in the kitchen with my mother, for wanting to learn how to dance like she did. Anger, anger at them both. Anger for my father for forcing this choice on me when I was too young to even remember. Anger at my mother for letting him do it.

"It's all falling apart.." I cried against his chest, laying against him, feeling his muzzle above my own and he rubbed his chin against me. "All of it!"

"No.. Shh... It's just comin' together, Shall." He whispered in my ear and squeezed me harder, as if he could hold me together as I fell apart.

I cried for the lies, every damned lie they had told me growing up. How many times had my mother assured me that I was normal? That I was fine? I had always believed she'd loved me, even when she let my father hurt me, I'd believed in her love and it was all falling apart all over. I cried for so many things, parts that were nightmarish flashes of youth that I buried in the darkness of my soul. Too afraid of them to look. I cried until my tears stopped coming and my entire body trembled in place, my teeth chattering together as I felt so cold, so lost. So exhausted. Even after the shaking sobs left and I was silent save for my trembling breathing CJ continued talking in that strange soft language while I squeezed my eyes shut. I heard the soft sound of his heart against my ear, the vibrations of his voice, a comforting presence. I only stirred when the couch moved and another set of arms moved gently against me, and I jerked my head up while someone made a soft soothing noise.

"It's alright, you're safe." The unaccented voice was barely a whisper as I blindly turned my head up and nearly came nose to nose with a rabbit. Stefan. "I didn't mean to startle you."

His padless paw stroked my arm very gently, dropping down beside the couch so one of his arms draped over my waist and CJ's. I knew exactly what it must look like, my ears burned hotly as I realized he must have come in seeing me clinging to his boyfriend and probably thought it was for another reason entirely. I tried to stand up and stammer an apology, the movement nearly cracking my head under the rat's chin. He must have come home at some point, I didn't even know when he did, I couldn't recall the sound of the door opening or shutting. Neither of them tried to stop me, but Stefan was smiling at me as he leaned back and balanced carefully on the tips of his toes. He didn't look angry in the least bit as I managed to scrub my hand over my eyes. My nose felt sensitive and raw as I sucked in a breath, trying to clear it. My eyes were still burning as I tried to figure out something to say. I didn't even know Stefan that well and he'd watched me break down in the middle of his living room.

Stefan was an odd looking rabbit, black from ears to toes, with only one white spot right on his forehead, but his eyes were a vivid clear blue. He was rather striking against the white backdrop of the couch and he stood up slowly while CJ struggled to sit up on the couch. His chest fur was rather matted from my tears and I pinned my ears down flat to my head. How long had I been crying? I didn't even know, it had felt like only a minute, but a glance at the window showed that the sun was nearly all the way set, the edge of dusk had started to come. CJ stood up, almost like he understood I wanted to bolt, and reached over to wrap an arm over my shoulders in a fraternal hug, his fingers reaching up to brush over the damp fur on my cheeks.

"I know you might not believe this, but sometimes you gotta break all the way down before the pieces can fit together again." CJ smiled a little bit and leaned forward, his lips brushed injured cheek gently in a soft kiss. "We can help you find answers, ya just need a little help."

"Answers to what?" My voice was thick from crying and I sucked in a breath, my nose felt clogged, my eyes gritty. Stefan reached over to the coffee table and offered me tissues wordlessly, a sympathetic smile on his face.

"You're not the only person that was ever born into a body that wasn't right for them." CJ gave a sad little smile and touched my chin, speaking with an effort to clear his accent to make sure I understood just what he was saying. "And you are not 'wrong', you are exactly right, Shall. Sometimes, the path to making yourself whole is just a hard one. No one was ever born exactly what they were destined to be all their lives."

"But I wasn't bo-" I started, but Stefan snorted next to me, the short rabbit folded his long ears back and shook his head.

"No. You were born." Stefan interrupted. "There was no right or wrong way. You were born and that in itself is a glorious miracle and from that moment absolutely anything is possible. You were born one way, but that does not dictate your entire life. Or the choices you make. What you were told as a child can change as an adult, will change as an adult, as you become yourself and not the child of your parents' teachings."

I paused as I tried to dry the tears on my cheeks, Stefan's words were stern, his voice a bit stiffer than CJ's had been, but the rabbit didn't seem the least bit in doubt that what he said was absolute truth. I had been born something 'other', but just because my parents had forced me into where I was now, did I really have to stay that way? Become what they made me? If I could keep myself from becoming like my father, didn't it stand to reason there were other things that could change too? It was like something unfurling in my mind, a vast strange new world that spread on and on with that simple thought. It was a simple truth, not complicated, not layered, just a truth. I didn't have to be what others had tried to make me be. It was a revelation that made me forget my sore nose and gritty eyes and simply nod my head. Change.

"Come on, there's no use sitting here," Stefan spoke up in a more chipper voice and touched my hand. "You can help me put away groceries and cook. Calhoun is useless in the kitchen and I've never had any experience cooking for predators, I have much to learn."

"Calhoun?" I blinked a few times and CJ suddenly made a mock growl, tensing up so that I flicked my ears to either side. "Your real name is Calhoun."

"CJ, thank you very much. I gave up that particular name when I got here, ya hear?" He snapped out, but his eyes glittered with laughter and mischief, belying the growly tone. "And if you tell anyone I'll shave your tail, got it?"

I managed a laugh, startled out of me, but it still came and with it came a feeling of relaxing muscles over my shoulders. I felt dizzy and my head heavy from crying, but the laughter eased that feeling. As CJ began to growl out playful threats regarding the future state of my tail, the laughter grew a bit more and I relaxed. I felt more alive than I had in days, the ground solid beneath my feet in more than one way. It had seemed like forever since I had found solid ground.

"You should know what the J stands for." Stefan winked one bright blue eye and bolted, faster than an eye blink as CJ tried to catch him. "I'll tell you over dinner."

I grinned, the feeling strange on my muzzle as it pulled against the sore spot, but it was a real smile. Not forced. They hadn't turned me out, they didn't think I was wrong. Perhaps... Perhaps they were right.