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Chapter 18

Zaldon was glad when Aliona finally left the kitchen. He'd been trying for the last ten minutes or so not to get hard. It was becoming painful.

Now he was alone in the kitchen with Julyan, and he watched with burning black eyes as Julyan - completely oblivious - bent over with swinging dick and balls to close the oven. He was still wearing the frilly purple apron - which set off his lavender eyes beautifully - and Zaldon found himself turned on by the fact. He imagined tugging on those apron strings with his teeth as he tweaked Julyan's nipples.

". . . cakes with roses made of icing," Julyan was saying. Before he had a chance to straighten up, Zaldon was on him. He cried out as his husband wrapped a big arm around his chest and fondled his cock. Julyan sputtered, shivering under Zaldon's hungry kisses. The apron was tight on his bulging muscles and even tighter when Zaldon pulled the neck-strings in his teeth. Julyan fumbled for the strings.

"No - don't take it off," Zaldon whispered, burying his face in Julyan's neck.

"Oh - Z-Zaldon! What if someone walks in!"

"I don't care!"

They staggered through the room together as Zaldon continued his hungry advances. Julyan caught himself against a counter and cried out when Zaldon bent him over by the neck. Zaldon's big paw fumbled under the apron again and he kicked Julyan's legs apart. Breathless and blushing and on fire from Zaldon's touch, Julyan moaned, frowning with pleasure as the bigger male overpowered him. He was dripping in Zaldon's paw but still made his feeble protests.

"You beast!" he scolded. "A-Anyone could come in here! Anyone!"

"Let them come," Zaldon whispered. He knelt down, and forcing Julyan around, he stuck his head under the apron . . . and ravished his cock.

Julyan cried out as he was sucked and slurped. He fumbled to keep his balance and wound up smacking more items off the counter. Looking down, he could see the lump that was Zaldon's head moving under his apron. Zaldon's hot tongue slurped, wrapping around him, flicking and caressing. Then Zaldon carefully licked his heavy balls, all the while fingering the tender place between cock and scrotum.

Julyan shivered. "Oh, Zaldon . . . oh honey . . ." His head fell back and he gave in. What was the use arguing? Zaldon never stopped, never listened when he wanted it. He just took it. And the fact that he just took it . . . made Julyan painfully hard.

Zaldon stood up in a sudden frenzy. He spun Julyan around to face the counter and knocked his legs apart again. Julyan trembled to keep his balance as Zaldon took the apron strings in his teeth - and punched his cock in.

"Ah!"

"Oh, Julyan . . . baby . . . clench. Clench on me . . ."

"Oh, _Zaldon . . ._I'm dripping . . ."

"I know . . . I tasted it . . . my Lavender Eyes," he whispered in his ear.

They panted brokenly as they rocked against the counter. Julyan thought he was going to erupt. Zaldon's big paw was fondling him gently. He tugged on the apron strings with his teeth, then reached under and fumbled to tweak Julyan's nipples. Julyan cried out and felt his cock twitch and drip harder. They rocked against the counter until they had both erupted.

Julyan was amazed that no one had come barging in on them. He was even more amazed when Zaldon sat in a chair, smeared his dick with icing, and told Julyan to lick it off.

"Ah, ah, ah," Zaldon said, waving a finger when Julyan's paw went to the apron strings, "leave the apron on."

Julyan laughed and slowly crawled toward Zaldon, his muscular body tight in the apron, his cock flapping. He knelt between Zaldon's hard thighs, and smiling at his husband, he slowly began to lick the icing off. He was trailing his tongue lightly along Zaldon's shaft when someone finally barged in.

It was Lynny. Lynny halted in the kitchen door a moment, then laughed and quickly closed it behind him. It suddenly seemed to him as if he was barging in on way too much sex around here.

"There better be a fire on the other side of that door," Zaldon said irritably as Julyan got to his feet, "or else I'll throw you back out!"

Lynny scowled.

"Zaldon," Julyan scolded.

Zaldon bit his lip and averted his eyes under Julyan's scolding glare. He tried not to look too embarrassed when Julyan took a cloth and carefully wiped the icing from his hard cock - a hard-on that was quickly softening as Lynny watched the fussing in amusement.

"You two have a good talk," Julyan said, finally removing his apron. He folded it and slung it over a chair. "Goodness knows you both need it. I didn't slave in this hot kitchen, making a feast for those kids' wedding so you two could muck it up with your petty bickering!" He took Lynny's paw and placed it in Zaldon's. The brothers looked at each other grudgingly as Julyan said, "Talk to each other." With that, he kissed Zaldon on the cheek and left, hard ass cheeks flexing and tail swishing.

"So . . . finally fucking your husband instead of someone else's?" Lynny said, pulling up a chair.

Zaldon gave him a playful ruffle on the mane very reminiscent of breakfast that morning.

"Cut it out, you bug-ugly motherfucker," Lynny laughed.

Zaldon laughed too. "Ever look in a mirror? We look just alike."

"Not just. My cock's bigger."

Zaldon laughed again.

They sat in silence a long time. Lynny took out his pipe and lit up, knowing damn-well Julyan did not want him smoking in the house. He figured the kitchen was safe: there was smoke in here anyway.

Lynny filled the pipe with leaves and was aware of Zaldon watching him disapprovingly. Zaldon didn't really smoke, and what was more, Kel always refused to kiss him whenever he did.

The sea breeze swept through the back door and hit them, ruffling through their white fur. Lynny closed his eyes, feeling like a pup again. When he was a very small boy, Joli brought him to the sun village with Zaldon and her friends. He had always loved the water. Zaldon too. When they were little and Zaldon had argued with Bayne, he would always run off to a lake and stare at the water, thinking of the sun village. Sometimes Lynny would follow him, and they would sit beside the water together. In silence. And happiness.

Zaldon cleared his throat. "I . . . was drunk last night, Lynny . . ."

"I noticed, Dragon Breath," Lynny returned with a snort.

"How's your head?" Zaldon reached over to touch his brother, but Lynny flinched away, his ear flicking irritably.

"I'm notta pup, Zaldon. When are you going to learn?"

"Never," Zaldon returned, looking at his little brother mistily. "At least you didn't bruise. That vase really smacked you."

"It wasn't a vase. It was you."

"You smacked me harder, Lynny."

"Didn't."

"Did."

"Didn't!" Lynny cried irritably.

"In my face -- twice. I bit my tongue."

"Poor baby," Lynny said sarcastically.

Zaldon laughed. "Well, can you blame me for being pissed? You were in my bed fucking my Kel --"

"I wasn't fucking him," Lynny said, flattening his ears guiltily. "I was . . . jerking him off."

"Is that supposed to make it better?" Zaldon said with an incredulous laugh. He sighed and pushed his white mane back from his eyes. He glanced at Lynny sadly. "It's partly my fault, I know it. I never should have agreed to let you that first time . . . but we were young and stupid. And I thought I'd never see him again. I thought it was over."

"Ha. You thought it was over, and now you're marrying him!"

Zaldon stiffened. "Who told you . . .?"

"Heard it through the grapevine," Lynny said, puffing darkly on his pipe. "Kilyan said Loryn was drunk last night too . . . that you told him you were marrying Kel."

Zaldon leaned forward and dropped his face in his paws. "Damn you, Loryn," he said, scowling as he peered around the kitchen. "Loryn was drunk off his ass - why is Kilyan listening to him?"

Lynny chuckled. "Because even when Loryn is drunk off his ass, he tells the truth. And it wouldn't be unlike you to marry Kel, would it?"

"I was thinking about it," Zaldon admitted. "But I hadn't told anyone. No one knows but Julyan and Aliona . . . in case I change my mind."

"You mean chicken out."

"Shut up."

Lynny laughed. He clapped a comforting paw on Zaldon's broad back. "What is stopping you?" he said, looking at Zaldon with soft, concerned eyes. "You love him, he loves you - Julyan will want it. Aliona too. All signs say go."

Zaldon looked at Lynny with fear shimmering in his black eyes. "Kel is stopping me."

"Oh, Zaldon . . ."

Zaldon made a face. "I don't want him to say no. I'm terrified."

"He won't say no," Lynny chuckled, eying his pipe.

Zaldon glanced at him irritably. "You wouldn't understand. You didn't have to propose to Idella. You claimed her at your mating season!"

"She could have said no."

Zaldon snorted. "A winter wolf female saying no? Females don't get to say no . . ."

"But she could have said no to me. I would have walked away." Lynny stared mistily into space, not seeing the kitchen but a seventeen-year-old Idella. "God, she was beautiful. I was terrified - terrified! But I knew I had to make her mine." He stuck his pipe in his teeth, grinning at Zaldon. "And I did."

Zaldon had been watching Lynny fondly as he was talking. Now he shook his head and looked off. "You love Idella so much. I know it. So why are you so stuck on Kel?"

"Why are you?" Lynny returned bitterly.

Zaldon's ears flattened. "Sorry."

"Kel . . . represents what could have been. I'm not like you, Zaldy. I spent my whole life hiding who I am in the winter village."

Zaldon snorted: Lynny had no clue what the summer village was really like. He had spent his childhood painful hiding his love for Kel under Melgo's firm instructions. He hadn't been any freer to expression himself than his brother.

"What would life have been like," Lynny went on, "if I could have openly approached Kel?" He elbowed Zaldon. "Maybe I could have moved in on him during one of your drama-fests and married him."

Zaldon laughed dryly. "You wouldn't. You wouldn't do that to me."

Lynny laughed and nodded, looking at his pipe. "You're right: I wouldn't. But a guy can dream."

They fell silent, and Lynny puffed on his pipe, sending small clouds out the open back door that led to the garden.

"Lynny . . ."

"Yeah."

"Say our tribe didn't give a crap. Say tail chasers were allowed to live their lives. . . Would you have gone after Kel knowing that Dad . . . I mean, he would have been an ass about it. You know that."

Lynny's face darkened. "Dad was like that for a reason, Zaldy. He grew up in a village that hated tail chasers and taught him to hate them too. He grew up in a time that saw far more hatred than ours. You think it's bad now? Try forty or fifty years ago."

Zaldon snorted, amused. "You spent a lot of time listening to Dad's lectures, didn't you?"

Lynny's eyes hooded. "Sometimes I didn't have a choice."

Zaldon glanced at Lynny guiltily. He had always regretted the fact that he'd left Lynny behind with their father. But he really hadn't a choice either. After Eno told the entire winter village he was a tail chaser, he was banished by Eloein - who didn't want Zaldon around for fear he might tell Bayne what he was doing to Joli.

Zaldon cleared his throat. The door to the garden blew open again, and he rose to shut it. With his back to the room, his big paw rested against the door as he bowed his head. "I kind of . . . miss his lectures."

Lynny's ears pricked forward. Bayne had been dead for six years. During those six years, Zaldon had never said one nice word about him. In fact, Zaldon had avoided speaking about him all together. Zaldon didn't even come when Bayne was dying. He refused to come. And Bayne went to his grave, believing Lynny's repeated lie that Zaldon was coming . . . any minute now . . . Zaldon was coming . . .

"No, you don't," Lynny said darkly. "You don't get to talk about Dad after you made me sit at his bedside alone! Watching as he died - watching alone!"

Zaldon flattened his ears and didn't turn to face the room. "Nayati was there . . ." he muttered.

"Nayati was too busy blubbering and crying to be any help to me," Lynny said sullenly. "And that blockheaded husband of hers was even worse!"

"Idella . . ."

"Idella hated Dad," Lynny said with a laugh. He smiled, thinking of his wife. "She took proper care of him when he was dying. She was kind and sweet, like she always is," he said warmly. "But she was no comfort to me, much as she tried. I know she hated him. And he gave her reason to. Dad had to find fault with everything, and sure enough, he found fault with Della."

"I'm sorry I didn't come."

"So you've said," Lynny said dispassionately and puffed on his pipe.

"I . . . couldn't face him," Zaldon muttered. "The last time we talked . . ." He swallowed hard. He frowned. "You told Dad about Julyan --!"

"Did you expect him to stay a secret forever?" Lynny snorted.

"He tried to talk to me about him and wound up being an ass. As always."

"But he _tried,_Zaldon," Lynny said softly. "That's the point. He tried." He patted the chair beside him, and after glancing at it reluctantly, Zaldon moved heavily through the room and sat beside his brother once more.

"Dad would always get pissed whenever you wouldn't do what he told you," went on Lynny calmly. "You didn't want to be warrior . . . and then you didn't want to fuck females. You basically did everything he didn't want you to do."

Zaldon laughed sadly.

"He kinda had rocks for brains," Lynny went on, "you know that. It was hard for him to grasp anything that wasn't immediately within his understanding. He could only identify with warriors and straight males -- wolves like him, basically. Anyone else and he . . . would get frustrated. He just didn't understand. How did Mom put it . . . Oh yeah." Lynny smiled. "Dad couldn't see past the end of his own snout."

Zaldon smiled sadly. With Bayne's death, Lynny had decided to finally face their mother and reconcile. Zaldon was very glad to see it happen. Melgo - being much older - had died some years before, leaving Joli all alone. Zaldon went to visit her during those times he visited Kel, and after they made up, so did Lynny. She died five years after Bayne.

Zaldon leaned forward, staring at his clasped paws. "He tried to talk to me about Julyan, asked me if he was treating me right. I told him he was . . . then he made some stupid crack about how I might be straight after all given that Julyan was so effeminate." Zaldon scowled. "What did you tell him? That Julyan sells cakes with pink icing at the market?"

Lynny laughed guiltily. "That wouldn't be far off, Zaldy . . ."

Zaldon glanced at Lynny irritably. "Anyway. He kept on with the jokes. I got mad and stormed out. That was the last time I saw him. He could call me all the cruel names he wanted to, but not Julyan. Not Lavender Eyes."

They fell silent. Lynny puffed sadly on his pipe, thinking of Bayne on his deathbed . . . thinking of the rolled up letter in his satchel. Given that he liked to smoke, Lynny was almost always wearing a satchel to carry his pipe and leaves in. In the bag now was a thin cylindrical tube made of leather. Inside the tube was a rolled up letter. A letter from Bayne for Zaldon.

"He asked about you all the time," Lynny said quietly. He laughed. "The same way you always asked about him. I swear, for two males who didn't get along, the two of you had a fair few things in common."

Zaldon flattened his ears. "Don't say that! I'm nothing like him!"

Lynny only laughed. "That's what Dad said . . . when I said the same thing to him."

Zaldon bit his lip and looked away. "So about Kel," he said abruptly.

"You're really gonna marry him, huh?"

"One of these decades," Zaldon said with a weak laugh.

"Then you have my blessing - a blessing you should have had all along. I'm sorry for last night . . . that won't happen again."

Zaldon smiled fondly at his brother and threw his big arm around him. Lynny smiled reluctantly when Zaldon kissed his head.

"Zaldon! Do I look like Julyan to you?"

"It's alright, Lynny. About Kel. I know exactly how you feel."

Lynny relented, dropping his head on Zaldon's shoulder. "So are you sticking around for supper tonight? I know the chieftess keeps calling you to court. More and more, it seems."

Zaldon sighed heavily. "You know what?" he said grimly. "Keep this between us but . . . I believe she's being poisoned."

Lynny's ears pricked forward.

"Slowly over the years, something untraceable that's endangered her every pregnancy. I've yet to find the culprit," Zaldon went on, "but I've got my suspects. The court sorceress Tahki has some crush on Chief Argon. She's my number one. Then . . . there're the rulers of the moon village. There's supposed to be a peace treaty now, but Chief Kachada could be poisoning Argon to get back at him for banning the slavers from the village . . ."

"Oh god," Lynny moaned, straightening up. "Spare me the political intrigue. Here." Lynny pulled the tube from his satchel and passed it to Zaldon.

Zaldon took the tube, and with careful fingers, he opened it. A bit of rolled up parchment slid out in his paw, tied with hemp cord and slightly yellow with age. Zaldon looked at Lynny for an explanation.

Lynny smiled. "Dad said to give it to you when you seemed ready to talk about him." He snorted. "I've been holding on to that damn thing for six fucking years. I thought this day would never come."

Zaldon hated it when his throat tightened up. "Dad?" he said, choked a little with emotion.

Lynny's black eyes softened. "Dad," he confirmed, touching Zaldon's mane. "Read it . . . and know some peace. I'll see you at supper, Zaldy." With that, he lumbered out.

Zaldon swallowed hard and tears rose to blind him as he carefully unrolled the letter and read the following:

Zaldy,

_ _

I know I wasn't the best father. Let's get that out of the way. I know I was a bully. I was always right and I always knew what was best for you and that was the bottom line.

_ _

I'm sorry.

_ _

There were times when I pushed too hard, made crude jokes without regard for your feelings, and expected without argument for you to be a male just like me. In my last hours, I can only say I am glad you are not a male like me.

_ _

You are sensitive, my Zaldy. There were many times when I called you weak for it, soft, a crybaby. You stayed true to yourself and did not allow my words to change who you are. I can only admire my boy for that.

_ _

You are a good boy. You are my boy and I love you. That will always be true. No matter how we fight, no matter how our differences seem to come between us, it will remain true.

_ _

Lynny tells me you are back with that boy now. That Kel. I hope you make it decent and marry him and his wife proper - if such a situation could be called decent and proper. Lynny has told me it is custom over in that sun village of yours. And Eloein held the sun village in high regard, so I can't imagine why you shouldn't follow their customs and marry both Kel and Aliona.

_ _

_Right now our great ancestor Imani is frowning - marry that boy and his wife. Make a legal family out of yourselves. Because if you're going to be a tail chaser, at least do it right. If you're gonna fuck guys, Zaldon, don't be half-assed. I didn't raise sons who ignore custom! _

_ _

Also, don't let that Julyan of yours get away. Lynny came home with some of his baking. I didn't know an orgasm could be baked. Turns out it can! Keep him in your life. Fill your life with love and laughter, and knowing that you haven't wound up like me, I can die happy.

_ _

I love you, Zaldy. There. I've said it twice. Happy? You and your damn brother always complained that I wasn't mushy enough. So here I am, pouring my heart out.

_ _

Take care of yourself and know that Daddy loves you. Don't hurt anymore because of me. I have gone on. I have rejoined with nature. I'm in the trees and the earth, the wind and the flowers.

_ _

I'm with you. Always.

_ _

Bayne