Undisclosed Desires Chapter 5: Decay
#5 of Undisclosed Desires
Final chapter. Stay tuned for sequel.
Chapter 5: Decay
There was an unusual silence amongst the dogs of the town in the hours following the incident with the Balto family. Nobody dared utter a word about it but to those whom they trusted most for they feared what sort of violence they would precipitate if their rumors had fallen upon ears which would be offended by them, but it weighed heavily upon their minds and lingered over them like a dark cloud.
As one could expect word had spread like a virus, despite people's best attempts to keep it contained, and had already reached the team by the time Kodi had regained consciousness and managed to drag himself home, but rather than tease him as they normally would have in a situation where he got busted having sex, they all simply stared at him as he sulked into his corner with a sort of silence that spoke louder than any words they could have conjured.
They needed not speak to him, for he knew already what thoughts had crossed their minds. They were repulsed, disgusted, and ashamed of him for what he had done, but in spite of this, they were even saddened because they hated to see such events happen to one so close to them; but their relationship was simply not strong enough to overlook his actions.
He had given into a disgusting fantasy, desecrated his mother, and soiled the name of his family forever because something like this would never go away. No longer would the dogs remember Balto as the Savior of Nome, but the husband and father of two incestuous sickos who did the dirty as mother and son. No more would his father walk proudly in the streets, for all he would see and hear would be disgusted whispers and hushed sniggerings from passersby who would point and laugh as they romanticized about that which had ruined him, and no longer would Kodi be able to hold his head high in this town either, for all anybody would see him as now would be the one who had sexual intercourse with his mother. His reputation and dignity were completely destroyed, and to make matters worse, he now had a pup on the way who would forever be labeled as the product of incestuous acts. It would be shunned from society, damned to live the life of an outcast who was hated for something over which it had no control. Hatred and spite would be all it knew until the day it finally died. And it was all his fault.
Kodi sighed as he deposited his head on his paws, turning his eyes away from all who stared at him, for he knew that he could never look anybody in the eyes ever again, not even himself.
Why did he even come back here? Why was he even still in town? There was nothing left for him here but a life of shame and anguish. He would certainly keep his job, as the humans would not know what had happened, but all of his teammates would turn away from him like he no longer existed as an individual, and the rest of his family would disown him for the dishonorable atrocity he had committed, leaving only loneliness and misery as his companions as he walked alone amongst the crowds.
And he knew that being condemned to such a fate was what he truly deserved, but he just was not sure if he could face such a life. He was a social being and longed for companionship, but he had no friends anymore. There were only memories and he did not know if he could take the pain of being reminded of his sin every day when he looked at the town around him, or in the fleeting glances of his former friends, or in the eyes of his pup because he knew that living with the memory which had already been branded into his mind would be difficult enough without the constant reminders of why he now lived as he did.
He sighed inwardly, not moving a muscle.
He had to find a place to hide, to escape from all of this, even though there was a part of him that knew that he could never escape his past- no matter how far he ran.
But at least he could give it a shot.
After all, out there he would at least be able to push the memory into the back of his mind until his dreams resurrected it while he slept. It was not much of an improvement, but at least it would be better than this.
Jenna hated herself more than she thought anybody was capable of hating themselves, so much so that she almost felt as though she no longer deserved to live.
Everything that had happened was entirely her fault. She had lost the love of her life and torn her family apart, all because she had to give in to some nasty impulse brought about in lee of a moment which would have made any normal parent sick.
What was wrong with her?
Was she really so fucked up in the head that having sex with her own son was an acceptable action? What kind of mother longed to have her son drilling her from behind with his big, thick cock, making her scream like a bitch as he pounded her into the floor? What kind of mother would want her son to smack her ass with his paws and call her dirty names as he plowed deep into her-
She quickly pulled herself out of her thoughts upon the realization that she was becoming wet with excitement and sighed with shame.
Apparently she was that fucked up in the head.
Her shame was quickly replaced by disgust and her self loathing swelled once more.
Balto was right.
She was nothing but a whore, a filthy, thrill-seeking whore who cared only for pleasure and possessed no concern for how or from whom she received it just so long as she got a good fuck.
And she guessed that this did not exclude her own children, whom she had conceived with her former mate and birthed into this world as a resemblance of her own flesh and blood.
And now she would again be birthing a child, but this time it would belong to her youngest son and her mate would not be there to support her.
But at least she would still have Kodi.
She knew that he probably was not ready for fatherhood, and the idea of it probably petrified him, but she felt as though if they worked together they could raise their pup right.
But, of course, this all depended on if they could even show their faces in this town ever again.
Half the population had seen the events which had unfolded in the earlier hours of the day, and the other half which did not would have surely heard about it by now.
She knew that neither one of them could walk the streets without getting friction from the other dogs, but she felt as though they could manage if they tried to keep to themselves, so most likely they would not have to go into hiding.
But what about Balto? He had too much established here to just pack up and leave, but she knew that since his name had been blackened as well, his visits to the town would be similar to those in the days prior the Diphtheria scare when he had to move in the alleys or on the rooftops in order to get food without incident.
But that posed a problem for them, because if he was still in town they would surely bump into each other some time, and who knows what would happen then...
She wished not to dwell on that, so she decided to shove that thought to the back of her mind and cross that bridge when she came to it. For now, she needed to speak to her son and get things squared away, because the way she saw it, they were all each other had left to get them through this dark time. After all, they both shared the fault, so they both needed to face it head on.
She pushed herself to her paws and collected her composure, preparing herself to step out into the eye of the public for the first time in over five hours. She just hoped that since night was fast approaching, the occupants of the town would be turning in for the night and the streets would be less crowded.
She took in a deep breath at the door of the shed then pushed it open as she let it out, being greeted immediately by a cool breeze. Having spent so much time indoors, she was not acclimated to the change in temperature and henceforth had to bristle her fur against the wind, but she was used to being cold, so this was nothing out of the ordinary.
With brisk movements, she turned and closed the door once more so as to preserve the warmth of her sleeping quarters, then turned toward the fence which surrounded her home.
"Just like any other day," she muttered to herself then began to walk.
As she approached, she felt her stomach twist into knots, but as she rounded the corner and revealed herself to the town, she found the streets deserted save a sparse number of humans spread out on each side of the street.
Relieved, she began to walk toward the edge of the town where the boiler room resided, hoping that Kodi would still be there. Though she wouldn't be surprised at all if he did not go back.
If he was hiding somewhere inside the town, finding him would be a bit more difficult, but it was something that she felt she could handle if she kept a cool head.
However, she would never know until she investigated, so she kept on her current track until she arrived at the door of the boiler room. She considered simply walking in, but thought better of it and decided to get a log on its occupants from above through the loft window, so she went around the left side and climbed on the stack of wood which was piled beside the gated stairs, then leapt onto them as quietly as she could.
The steps were so old and dilapidated that she doubted any humans used them anymore, which meant that she should probably not use them either, but she needed to, so she began to climb anyway. She just needed to be extra careful to make sure that she did not set her paw upon a rotten board as she made her ascent.
Finally, after a painstakingly slow process of prodding and testing, she arrived on the platform near the loft window, and upon arrival, she heard muddled voices. Intrigued, she perked her ears and approached the window, then peered down into the boiler room, finding the entire team present save the one she sought.
"... the nerve of that guy?" Jenna heard Dusty rant, "showing up back here after everything he did."
Jenna saw the one she knew to be named Kirby rise and take a seat with his back to them.
"I still don't think that we should have let him go," he said through a sigh, "it's dangerous out there beyond the town."
Jenna felt a sinking sensation in her stomach, but desperation told her that she just wasn't hearing the whole story, so she continued to listen, hoping that she hadn't heard right.
"Who cares?" Dusty spat, rising to her haunches defensively, "if he dies out there in the woods, he'll be getting everything that he deserves."
The conversation continued, now with greater passion between the two, but Jenna did not hear anything further, as the news made her begin to reel.
"No," she said, backing out if the window, "no. No. No."
She turned and began to make her way quickly down the steps, caring not to take caution this time as she descended, and once she was at the bottom once more, she bolted off into the fading day, hoping to anything she could think of that she could find him before it was too late.
She tore through the town, casting her head in every direction as she ran, picking around every corner, or through every long shadow for her son. She checked the alley ways, the post office, even her shed to see if just maybe he had come back, but her search inevitably led her out to the outskirts of town; but by now she was too late. Darkness had fallen as she stood on the forest's edge, and she knew now that she would never find him. She was not familiar enough with the woods to dare venture out into them after dark, and by the time morning came to vacuum out the night, he would be too far ahead. He was gone, and for the first time in what seemed like forever, she was completely, and totally, on her own.
Kodi felt guilt tugging at the base of his stomach as he ventured out into the blackened woods, because he knew that he shared equal responsibility in the pup's conception, and knew that as its father, it was his responsibility to raise it, but he was a mere pup himself, as he could clearly see. Instead of facing his problems head on like a man, he had turned and run like a pup, leaving his mother and their unborn child alone to fend for themselves. He knew that he was a despicable being, but at least he was free of the friction back in town. At least out here, he could make a fresh start.
The curses, screams, and crashes which emitted from Jenna's shed could be heard all the way in the street, but at least they did not reach the rooms of those who slept inside the house, because if they did, the family would walk in to find a sight most unpleasant.
Jenna tore through the shed like a tornado, knocking down anything she could and slamming against anything that she couldn't, and from her mouth, bitter and spiteful words rang out like the shrill cry of a banshee, letting the entire world know just how much she hated it.
She hated Kodi, and the pup that he left inside of her, and wished nothing but a slow and agonizing death for both of them. How she hoped that Kodi would wind up falling off of a cliff, but not so far as to kill him, no- only enough to break every bone in his legs so he could not move. The death that would come to him would be so fitting. He would cry out for help, but none would come, and after two weeks, if the cold didn't get to him first, he would starve to death.
Just the thought of it made her smile as she stood amongst the wreckage that was now her home, and as she continued to dwell on the subject, panting heavily from fatigue, her rage conceded to sadism.
What should she do to the pup?
Should she let it grow and then beat it to death in her womb?
No... she did not like the idea of self-injury, and besides, if she were to kill the pup while it was still inside of her, she would probably die as well, so maybe that wasn't such a good idea...
What if she birthed it and then drowned it?
No... if she went through the trouble of giving birth to it, she might as well let it live... but the question was: what would she do with it?
She considered the possibilities, coming up with many ideas as to how she could make its life miserable, but none of them seemed to be good enough.
Beating it or starving it would just make it run away, and if that happened the fun would be over, so what could she do that ensured that the pup would stay, while torturing it at the same time?
Hmm...
That's it!
She could poison its mind with hatred, make its entire life goal to be finding his father and killing him for what he did to them.
It was perfect, really, because what better way to exact revenge on somebody than to have them be destroyed by the very thing they created?
As these thoughts entered her mind, she smiled evilly and turned her eyes down to her stomach.
"Diablo, I've got big plans for you."