Taco Fox
This is a ridiculous and intentionally over-the-top story I wrote in the span of roughly 12-14 hours. Part of it (you can probably guess which) was written half-asleep, part of it was written while on a phone while traveling, and the rest was finished and edited on a computer as usual.
This is intended to be a total and complete light-hearted joke and something that I can write just for the sake of writing. I am fully aware that it makes little to no sense, and frankly, I suppose I'm proud of that.
Thanks for reading,
~Taco Fox
Intro:
In the beginning, there was nothing. No stars, no planets, and not even a universe to fit them in; there was only Taco Fox.
He was an anomaly. A creature that on the outside was a devilishly handsome cross fox, but on the inside was an even tastier economy taco, a deliciously bizarre mixture of yin and yang, fur and shredded chicken, and everything in between. Some say he arose from a particularly drunken date between a fox and her food, some say his existence transcends all the gods in the galaxy, but that's not what matters. What matters is his story...
Book One:
Taco Fox was BORED. Not a little bored, or slightly bored, but full on bored with the kind of dullness that drives a fox filled with lettuce and hot sauce insane.
He had already tried everything to keep himself entertained: reading, writing, playing games, even furiously masturbating to dog porn, but nothing was working, and now Taco Fox was paying the price.
He idly drifted through the nothingless void, paws on and off his sheath and cock as he tried to think of an idea to entertain him. But nothing would come. In fact, Taco Fox began to question his very reality. Was he doomed to float through this purgatory of an existence? Was this all his life could be? Meaningless, useless, and boring beyond comprehension? How had it taken him this long to come to this conclusion, he wondered. The thought had never ever occurred to him before...
But then, Taco Fox had a realization. His life had been meaningless because he has not been himself, his life had been so empty because never once had he tried to be what he really was. He was a fox and a taco, but all this time he had only been the fox...
Taco Fox continued floating through the void, a small grin coming to his narrow little muzzle as he imagined his plan.
It was time to be the taco.
Book Two:
In all his existence, Taco Fox has never used his god-like powers. Someone had once warned him that with great power came responsibility, and the fox had never really felt confident enough to be held liable for his actions - until now.
Now he had purpose. Now he had a newfound drive, passion, and push to embrace the half he had been avoiding all along, a newfound purpose that was more taco than fox, more cheese than cock, more sauce than jizz, and he raised his paws up to his sides and began to form a perfect mental picture of what he wanted before shrieking out the magic words.
"TACO BELL, I SUMMON THEE!"
Instantly, lightning and sparks erupted from his fingertips and flew out towards the void to begin forming the distinctive silhouette of the famous fast food restaurant. Taco Fox had never felt so powerful. Why hadn't he ever used these powers to summon a video game, or a new book, or a hunk of a Doberman for him to blow?
But Taco Fox had little time to ponder his thoughts. With a bright flash, the Taco Bell was fully formed, along with a shitty little American strip mall and parking lot somewhere in California, and as he surveyed his creation, the fox knew that it was now his time. With another wave of his paws, sparks, and a second flash of light, Taco Fox summoned himself to the next stage of his journey...
Book Three:
Taco Fox found himself surrounded by the sweet smell of grilled meats and flour tortillas as he materialized in the kitchen of Taco Bell franchise #530. He was positioned at the top of a food bin, surrounded by strips of cooked chicken and lovely, lovely sauce, and the fox deeply inhaled. He was a taco, and a taco was he.
Behind him, a ferret employee quickly scurried around to keep up with the after work rush. Taco after taco was rolled together and pushed to the front counter, all of them in perfect order and combination, and as the next order came in over the overhead, Taco Fox realized that this was it.
"One soft chicken taco, extra meat and cheese, please."
No words could have sounded sweeter. Taco Fox shivered and squealed with pleasure as the meal was described, he was described, and he felt his well-processed meat insides warm with excitement. That was him! A beautiful little tortilla containing a food-filled fox, and if he wasn't about to be devoured, he was sure he would have remembered this moment forever. His heart raced an he felt his emotions soar higher than they ever had in his lifetime - this was the happiest day in his life!
The ferret came up to the counter to make the order, and Taco Fox squirmed with delight as a shadow fell across him. He could hardly keep himself from leaping out of the food bin and into the taco as the employee pulled out the crinkly taco wrapper and slapped it on the metal. He then took a steaming hot fresh tortilla and dropped it onto the paper before turning to the food bin and scooping up a dark plastic pair of grabbers.
Taco Fox whined with pure joy as the food tongs encircled his body to quickly snatch him up away from his bed of chicken and flick him down into the taco with a dull thud. Taco Fox didn't even get a chance to look at the face of the ferret; in less than a second he was rolled into the center, and pressed tightly down as the taco was pushed down around him. With a delightful crinkle, the wrapper was then folded up around him to seal the fox into a dull black paradise of smell and warmth, and he then felt the ferret's plastic-gloved paws toss him into the ready food area.
And as Taco Fox waited in his heavenly prepared soft taco shell, the perfect words escaped his lips.
"Thank you."
Book Four:
The warmth of a heat-lamp radiated off the white-green Taco Bell wrapper, and inside, Taco Fox slowly baked. Moisture from the other chicken strip began to collect against his fur and the tortilla walls, and the cheese on his body was melting into gooey, sticky blobs of pleasure that sunk straight into his skin. Beyond he could hear the ambiance of the restaurant, customers, register, and all, and he wriggled his body inside the taco and let out a small, happy chirp.
Soon.
The entire process had been arousing beyond belief. From the second he had appeared in the chicken bin, Taco Fox had felt a surge in his crotch like no other. Now his long, slender fox cock lay erect against the soft taco shell, just the perfect bit of delicious pre-sauce leaking out to stain the tortilla and the plastic wrapper. He was going to be hell of a taco...
Suddenly, several long, furry fingers wrapped around Taco Fox and dropped him down on the tray. He was swung around and slammed against the counter by a wolverine, and then the cashier hit a bell.
"Order thirty-three!"
That was him! He was number thirty-three! It felt like every single event of the day and universe, had been working towards uniting him with this customer! Thirty-three was perfect, beautiful, and the fox let out another happy squeak and quietly whispered the number to himself.
"Thirty-three..."
And then there was the sound of footsteps. Piercing, heightening thumps that came louder and closer every second to make Taco Fox's heart lurch. Before he could react, the tray was scooped up in midair and swung around yet again. He felt everything sway back and forth as the customer carried him to the table, and then stop as he was set down with a plastic loud clack.
There was a loud slurp from a soda straw, along with a crude burp, and Taco Fox's brain raced to piece together who was going to eat him. It definitely sounded like a male mammal, and they were eating meat which made them carnivorous, so maybe it was a bear. Or a cat. Or a fox or dog similar to himself. He didn't even care what species it was, as long as they devoured and thoroughly enjoyed him like the taco he was, and he began to hump and rub his cock against the tortilla as more and more delicious pre-sauce stained the wrapper while his heart wildly pounded in his ears.
Almost...
A claw suddenly poked the wrapper to create that distinct, beautiful crinkle, and Taco Fox unconsciously let out an excited squeak. In just a matter of seconds he was turned over and over as the taco was quickly and completely unwrapped, and light began to trickle back into his eyes. He caught a glimpse of the tray, the table, and the Taco Bell beyond, but then he suddenly jumped with delight as he saw a flash of a golden-orange canine paw - the customer was a dog. Out of all the possible options, out of all the possible customers, he had been given to what he considered to be the sexiest animal in the universe...
But Taco Fox had no time to think. In a split second, he was scooped and carried up by the canine's powerful arm. From his little cocoon of meat and cheese, he caught a glimpse of a dull navy uniform, barely able to contain the ripped chest and abs underneath. He was a guard! A big, strong hulk of a canine just like in his dreams, and Taco Fox let out a noisy squeak. How could this possibly get any better?!
The question was answered a mere moment later. The guard was a doberman.
Taco Fox almost fainted from the sudden spike of emotion. His heart was surging into euphoria, no, more than that. It was hyper-euphoria, and his mind was barely able to registered anything but the sheer passion. He was barely able to take in his devourer's face. The doberman's narrow, beautiful muzzle, his deep, but staunch golden-amber eyes, they way his ears curved upwards like two gorgeous sentinels... It was too much to take in, too much to believe, and he began looking down at his neck, the rippling, black and tan velvet fur-covered muscle that he would soon send him racing down to the stomach, before glancing back at the doberman's ever-widening maw.
Taco Fox squeaked and shivered wildly with joy as he raced towards his fate. He felt his cock throb as he orgasmed a puddle of white taco sauce; the tortilla and wrapper were fully saturated, along with most of the fox's body, and the doberman's mouth was fully open. The long pointed teeth beckoned him into a pink, red and black colored maw that was cushioned by a long thick tongue that jiggled up and down in front of him like a happy friend. Strings of sticky, glittery saliva stretched from roof to fang, and with every second more and more pooled onto the tongue to make the doberman start madly drooling upon the table.
He was drooling for him. This... this god-handsome specimen of a doberman was drooling for Taco Fox, and his brain was little more than a buzz of wild, uncontrolled exhilarated emotion as he entered the doberman's maw. He felt the damp, warm puffs of breath, the saliva begin to run into the little opening of the taco, and watched the jaw sna-
Daniel Doberman was enjoying a soft chicken taco. It may have been a little too crunchy at times and the cook had gone wild with the sauce, but overall, it was one of the better ones he'd had at the Taco Bell franchise. The canine finished it in a few quick bites, licked his paws clean, and then took a sip at his drink while surfing his phone.
After a few minutes he let out a loud burp and crumpled up the soggy wrapper, stuffed it into his soda cup with the straw, and discarded the trash. He then started up his car and drove to his cat boyfriend's house for a date. There they talked, watch TV, and played a few video games, but it quickly became sexual and Daniel ended up pounding the cat against the sofa. The two then finished each other off and fell asleep.
The next morning, Daniel awoke with his stomach and bowels wrenching in gassy pain, and woke up his boyfriend with an accidental kick to the crotch as he ran to the bathroom. Daniel then had one of the worst events of diarrhea he could remember, and loudly cursed "whatever the fuck the chef had put in that taco."
It was probably the 'sauce.'