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Chapter 23: Understanding at Last!

The next morning, Feral got up for work and left without saying much to Tendaji. He was still angry and upset by his condition. With Dark Kat somewhere planning something dire for the city, being pulled off combat duty couldn't have come at a worst time.

It was in that frame of mind, he reluctantly met with Dubaku for their regular meditation session an hour before lunch. His face set in grim lines told the Imamu that the dark tom was upset by something, it was Feral's aura that told Dubaku just how foul a mood the Commander was in.

Dubaku sighed. Ten had just informed him his mate was pregnant and not happy about it. His friend's anguished voice cut into the Imamu's heart. This should be a time of joy for them both but it clearly wasn't.

He took the Commander's coat and hung it up while Feral removed his boots and weapon. As the big tom was readying himself for the session, Dubaku studied the tom's aura for a moment. He could see the new lives he carried and the disharmony that still raged in the tom's soul.

He gestured for Feral to take his place on the mats he had placed on the floor. Dubaku sank gracefully to a cross-legged position on his mat and waited for the dark tom to do the same. With not as much grace nor tranquility Feral sank into the same position.

Dubaku eyed his friend's mate warily. "Ulysses, I've heard from Ten that you are pregnant but are not happy about it."

Feral's eyes narrowed and he growled low in his chest. "Why should I be happy about it? Dark Kat is up to something major and I have been pulled from combat duty at the worst time."

Dubaku kept his face smooth and noncommittal. "I see. Well that would make a warrior a bit testy, I guess but, Ulysses, you are a military leader not a foot soldier. Your leadership skills have not been blunted simply because you're pregnant. I know you're the type who must be at the forefront of his troops but many a good leader didn't feel the need to be in 'the thick of things' as it were. A leader can't lead if he's taken out of the battle by a well placed blow. You must remain in the rear so that you can see the whole picture and not just the piece you happen to be involved in." He chided gently.

Feral grit his teeth. He didn't appreciate Dubaku bringing up a point that had been hammered into him while he was in the academy. It was the one rule he refused to listen to even though it was a valid one. It always made him feel like a coward to stay behind the lines of conflict and no one had been able to shake his belief.

Dubaku sighed mentally as Feral refused to answer that with any response except for grim silence and staring at the floor in mulish defiance. This was an area the Commander was not open to change, at least not right now. Time to work on the area of more importance right now.

"Ulysses? If you had to use one word to describe your bonding with Tendaji, what would it be?"

Feral blinked in surprise at the sudden change of subject. He frowned into the Imamu's face for a reason for the odd question but all he could see was a placid expression. He looked away and thought about it for a moment before answering.

"Rape!"

Dubaku blinked in shock. 'Surely he didn't mean that!' He thought in dismay.

"I'm sorry. I'm confused...why do you think it was rape?"

"Because he took me without my permission, invading my home and taking me when I was at my most vulnerable."

"Please don't be defensive when I ask some questions because I truly want to understand why you feel this way. Did you feel an attraction for Tendaji during the security convention where you first met him?"

Feral sighed in annoyance. He wanted to snap at Dubaku to mind his own business but changed his mind. The Imamu was only trying to help and had been honest and straightforward in all his dealings with him. He thought about that moment that had changed his life months ago.

"It's been awhile but I seem to remember noting Ten and liking what I saw but I was too preoccupied to focus on that at the time."

Dubaku nodded. "Ten said he had felt the same and when you two shook paws he felt a strong jolt of attraction. How did you respond to him when he invaded your apartment?"

Feral blushed at the memory. "I was still asleep and was having a very erotic dream that turned out to be no dream. I responded as if I were a young teen aged kitten just learning about sex. His scent and experienced touches were like nothing I'd ever experienced before. By the time he took my virginity, I was his willingly, but when we finished I was left confused and bewildered by my behavior to a stranger."

"And how did you react toward him at that moment?"

"Angry, confused and ready to throw his tail out of my apartment."

"But you didn't." Dubaku said softly, certain of this.

Feral sighed, "No, because he pulled me close and took me again till I was totally senseless. We're of equal strength but at that moment I surrendered completely to him, much to my shock." He admitted.

"That was the bond and a very strong one, I might add, Ulysses." Dubaku said with certainty.

He eyed the dark tom a moment. Perhaps Feral still didn't understand what bonding meant to the lions. Though he knew the Commander had read the history of the Pride, Dubaku felt Ulysses still did not grasp it well enough.

"My friend, I believe you still do not understand us despite your reading our history. Listen closely and let me see if I can enlighten you. You see, of all the things we retained from our primitive past, the bonding instinct is the strongest and most important. Some of our more objectionable behavior traits have been stamped out with time like; males killing cubs to make females come into heat again, kicking teen males out of the pride, the male being the leader of the pride with a harem of females, etc." Dubaku explained gently.

Feral was drawn by the impromptu history lesson, despite his foul temper. Dubaku was just relieved the tom was listening as he continued.

"When a male lion finds his perfect match, he senses it in his mind and soul. He is driven by that instinct to take his mate. That is the biological imperative Ten told you about. However, it isn't one sided. The one chosen also feels this need, except for non-lions who may mistake it for simple attraction. That is where the hunt comes in. The male chases the female until she capitulates and is willing to mate and when that occurs usually a bonding happens. It is rare, but sometimes a hunt ends in just a fling and not a bond.

"Now, if the female is a lioness there's no problem during a hunt but if the female is of another breed then some confusion is expected and the male compensates by not being as forceful about taking the female to bed. He'll make a nuisance of himself pursuing her but never take her by force. He uses the strength of the attraction to get past a non-lion mate's resistance. This is why its never thought of as rape. In your case, Ten saw you as a warrior and didn't feel the need to chase you the same as he would a female.

All other normal matings have been consensual, I assure you. However, even I'm not naive enough to think that a lion has never resorted to rape throughout our long existence but the punishment for such a heinous crime is swift and, unlike your laws, is cause for immediate death." He said grimly.

Feral blinked at him in surprise. "That's rather harsh. It's a heinous crime, I agree...but death?"

"We are warriors, Ulysses. We hold to strict standards of behavior and anyone crossing the line is never given a second chance." The Imamu said firmly.

Feral sighed mentally and nodded his understanding as he went over what Dubaku had told him so far. "Alright, if I understand you correctly, Ten felt a deep attraction to me and knew I was the one for him. So when he invaded my home he was simply doing what nature intended and because I am male, he didn't feel the need to chase me. My capitulation to him without protest was my response to that same bonding instinct even though I didn't know that myself."

Dubaku smiled in relief. "Yes, that's it exactly. But because it didn't fit into your world view, you saw it as an invasion and rape. I know you care for Ten or the bond wouldn't have taken place."

Feral sighed and closed his eyes. This was the kind of stuff that caused him heartburn in his job. No way had he expected it to hound him into his private life as well. But at least he finally understood Ten's point of view when he'd tried to explain why lions had to do this in the first place. 'Well, I guess I'd better speak with Ms. Briggs about this as she makes up that new law about the Pride Hunts.' He thought resignedly.

He opened his eyes and stared at Dubaku with understanding. "Okay, I get it. So it wasn't rape because I didn't try to stop it and it was a fantastic moment that I'll never forget. So, I just have to accept that this is the way you guys find mates." He shrugged in annoyed resignation.

Dubaku felt a weight lift from his shoulders but before he could move on to a different subject, the dark tom barked a new question.

"But what about the fact that other lion's can try to take me from Ten despite our bonding?" Feral demanded.

"Now that is unusual. In our more civilized world, such behavior is unacceptable. I know Ten told you that it happens but what he failed to tell you is it is punishable by banishment from the Pride. Not many would risk that and the ones that do are rogues. He was just getting you to be careful that's all. You do lead a rather dangerous life." Dubaku said with a shrug.

"In other words, it was a white lie to make me toe the line." Feral's eyes narrowed in aggrieved annoyance.

Dubaku had to swallow the smirk that hovered on his lips. Feral saw right through that alright.

"Well, a little one but he was right about one thing...you are unique. Your rarity is why there's a bounty for you by that slave owner. Because of your uniqueness as a male hermaphrodite, some lions of other prides feel justified in trying to steal you from Ten. Despite the stigma of such vile behavior, the prize is worth it to some." Dubaku said more seriously.

"That is why I hadn't wanted my sexuality revealed but Ten's stupid grandstanding that day is why I'm now in the target zone in the first place." Feral rumbled, his eyes dark with fury at that memory.

"I won't say you or Ten were right about what happened that day. Nothing can be done to change what occurred. The Pride will protect you and that is all we can do." Dubaku said demurely.

Feral just snorted at that statement. Sighing Dubaku felt it was time to get back to Feral's other problem.

"It is because you are a male hermaphrodite that you are encountering problems with feeling the bond. I checked our history records and there is no report of such a mating ever taking place. Because of this, I have no guidance to tell me why you're having so much trouble nor how to aid you in fixing it. I believe your upbringing is partly at fault for this problem. You've been trained to not believe what you can't see or hear despite the fact you have encountered enough weirdness that doesn't fit into the norm as this city's guardian." Dubaku said seriously. "The only thing I'm able to tell you is you must want it badly enough to allow it to happen. Until you do, it's going to eat at you both."

Feral scowled at the Imamu. "That's the problem! I don't feel that need to open it. I don't know how to do this bad enough to have it happen."

"I know, Ulysses. I'm afraid something truly urgent will have to occur for you to reach out to Ten with all you are. Until that happens, the stress between you will only get worse." Dubaku spread his paws in equal frustration.

"That's just great!" Feral grunted bitterly.

"I'm truly sorry, Ulysses. This is an unusual circumstance and I'm just as lost as you on how to solve it."

"Yeah, I know...our bonding is unique." Feral grumbled, a sour look on his face.

Dubaku sighed and said that was only too true before leading Ulysses through a meditation exercise to help ease his stress then offered tea, as he usually did to end their session. They drank quietly then Feral put his boots back on while Dubaku fetched his coat and helped him on with it.

As he closed the door behind the Chief Enforcer, the Imamu felt this had been the most successful of their sessions despite not being able to lower the tom's stress levels. He hoped the problem of Feral's blocked bond would be solved very soon.

The dark tom's failure to sense his mate would extend to his cubs and that would be a terrible thing for both of them and could possibly cause the ending of the pregnancy prematurely. He shook his head and took the tea things to his kitchen, best not to think about that or it might jinx their future.

Feral decided to stop by city hall to see Ms. Briggs and explain what he'd just learned before she got any further in her writing up the new law. It took about thirty minutes before she understood where he was coming from and thanked him for making this matter more clear. She promised to take that into account and incorporate it into the Pride Hunt revision.

Content that he'd fixed a potential problem, Feral returned to his office and dug into his pile of work waiting for him.

It was late afternoon when he came across the report from one of his operatives working underground. One of the operative's snitches had seen something interesting just a few days ago.

Feral read the report avidly. It said the snitch had been doing a deal down near the waterfront and had just completed the transaction. He was making his way down an alley when he froze at the sound of voices coming from a just opening door. The snitch hid behind a foul smelling dumpster and waited.

One of the voices was cold and scary sounding. It was talking to another gruff voice about a delivery of something special coming in on a ship the next day. Over their voices, the snitch heard strange chittering sounds.

The operative managed to get the name of the ship which had arrived hours late the next day and was presently docked at pier twenty-five. The operative staked out the site and witnessed some suspicious characters off-loading a crate the size of a car onto a flat bed truck. Following the truck, he watched it be delivered to the same warehouse the snitch had heard the voices.

Since that day, there had been no further activity. It was now four days since this had happened.

Feral felt a thrill of hope. He sensed this might be the break he had been hoping for. He reached for his phone. He needed to get a hold of Felina then he would summon his best special ops squad so that they could all check this lead immediately.