Ander - Part 5: Subchapter 67
67
Off in the shadows, Dorin was staring at this display of affection, his body and soul completely numb. He was still alive, but he didn't know how to feel about that. Not happy, that's for certain, but not sad, either. There was just this tired disappointment floating around inside, like a moth stuck in a tent, lazily fluttering around looking for a way out.
Right now, his greatest desire was to go to sleep and make everything go away for a while. Maybe a long while.
Maybe forever.
He turned his head and saw his men, all in a line. They had varying degrees of the same open-mouthed look of incredulity plastered all over their faces (the conscious ones, at any rate), staring at Danado and Mellah as if they had grown an extra set of heads. Their behaviour must seem as alien to them as...
Dorin turned his head the other way and saw Wardo's knife sticking out of the bark, the bit of exposed blade shining in the moonlight.
He had almost killed himself with that knife. The difference between this waking misery and the black peacefulness of whatever came next was only a few inches.
Nilia stepped forward and pulled it out, leaving a gaping slit in the wood. She turned it over in her hand, feeling the weight of it. "What do you think I should do with this, Dorin?"
Dorin thought for a while. "The smart thing to do would be to go down this line and kill us all."
Nilia ran her fingers over the blade, her expression just as stony as ever. "Danado has far greater reason to kill you than I, but if he can stay his hand, then what right do I have to undo his conviction?"
Dorin chuckled. "That crazy old Wolf was right about you. You never think with your head, only your heart. I hope that weakness won't come back to haunt you in the end."
Nilia got down on one knee, holding the knife at eye-level. "Do you promise not to follow us any further?"
Dorin shook his head. "What would be the point?"
Nilia nodded. "That's good enough."
"Wait!" Thoka suddenly spoke up. His voice was high and cracking, not at all like his usual drone. "Does that mean you're going to let us go? Just like that?"
"Yes."
"But -" He looked to his comrades, perhaps seeking support. "But we might come after you!"
"We won't," Dorin said, knowing it wouldn't make any difference.
"But they don't know that!" He sounded on the verge of hysterics. "This - Why? You're either stupid or insane! It doesn't make any sense!"
Nilia twirled the knife between her fingers and pointed it at Thoka. "Are you saying you'd prefer to die? If so, I might make an exception for you."
"No! It's just..." The look on his face, so confused. "I don't understand..."
"And you probably never will." Nilia bent down and slid the tip of the knife underneath Dorin's bindings. While she was sawing through, she leaned in close until her lips were almost brushing against his floppy ear, and whispered: "You saved my group, now we're saving yours. This makes us even."
The bindings unravelled and fell over his knees like a pair of dead snakes. "I understand."
Nilia stood up and chucked the knife into the snow with a casual flick of the wrist, then turned back to her friends. Sorrin already had Danado on his back, and Mellah had retrieved Renna from whatever corner of the woods she had been made to wait in.
"We still have a long way to go. Is everyone holding up all right?"
Sombre nods from the members of her group; tired, but resolute, intent on reaching their destination no matter what.
Hezzi padded through the snow, wearing a rather out-of-place smile. "Come on, I'll lead the way, it's not that far, it's just over -" His face sagged without warning and he started to pitch forward, his eyes half-lidded and unfocussed.
Nilia caught him just before he could fall face-first into the snow, but the sight of his back made Dorin wonder whether her efforts were all in vain.
There was a steady stream of blood flowing out from beneath the leaves tied around his waist. Small spots of red appeared in the snow beneath his body as if by magic, melting it away into ugly potmarks.
Renna screamed and clapped her hands over her mouth while the others watched on, completely helpless.
"Hezzi?" Nilia said, shaking him lightly. "Hezzi!?"
"It's just over... over..." His eyes flickered, then fell shut, and his whole body went limp in her arms.
"Hezzi!" Renna broke free of Mellah's grasp and rushed to her friend's side, calling his name over and over again.
They're all fighting to protect who they love and care for, not what they hunger for.
Nilia slipped Hezzi across her back, his arms and legs dangling in the wind, "We have to go!" she said. "Right now!"
They hastened into the darkest shadows of the woods: Mellah, Sorrin, Danado, Renna, Hezzi, and Nilia. Wolves that were always a little different.
Nilia looked back only once, her hair streaming in the breeze, flecked with snowflakes. Hezzi's head was resting on her shoulder, his eyes still closed. He was on the verge of death, and yet he still looked so happy, almost like the time so long ago, before the world went to hell.
And then they were gone.
Dorin sighed, picked up Wardo's cursed knife and cut the bindings around his ankles.
"Hey," Thoka said, licking his lips. "Hey, um, Sai? What are we going to do now?"
"We're going home, Thoka," Dorin replied. He wasn't in the mood for stupid questions. "Hyker and the others are hurt. Bringing them back safely is the most important thing right now."
"But we have a mission to do!"
"You want to go after them alone? I'd rather not test their mercy a second time, but be my guest."
"But... But if we go back empty-handed, what will the Chieftain do to us?"
Dorin paused. For some reason Wardo's wrath didn't seem all that scary anymore. "You were all following my orders. If there's going to be a punishment, it will fall on me, so don't worry."
"But -"
"What's the worst he could do? Kill me? I just don't care anymore, Thoka. I just. Don't. Care."
"I doubt that's the worst he could do..." Thoka whispered, and Dorin agreed.
He bent down and sliced through the big Wolf's bindings. "Come on, get up. Hyker's the heaviest, so you carry him. I'll carry Denko." He freed Yannek and Vekka next. "You two can carry Seffer and Ivio."
They nodded, but didn't say anything. They had a blank, hollow stare about their eyes, and Dorin didn't think it was solely the result of their brush with death. They had seen things they do not understand, had heard things that made no sense. By all rights they should be dead, but it was the very thing they had no understanding of that had ensured their survival. It was something they would no doubt turn over and over in their minds as they lay in their bedrolls, staring up at the coned ceilings of their tents, waiting for sleep to come.
Dorin didn't think he'd have the same problem. The next time he got back home, he would sleep soundly.
And he would never wake up again.
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