Tabitha Crane, Chapter X: Such Great Heights
#10 of Tabitha Crane: Ferret-Girl at Large
Tabitha Crane is just trying to make it through her last months before she can leave her small town for the university. There's only one minor complication: she's over 90 feet tall. When Tabitha moves to a new town, her parents hope she can have a fresh start. Instead, she finds a whole load of trouble along with a mink who might just see her as more than some gigantic monster.
Part X: Reynard meets up with Ciaran to discuss developments and the obstacles facing Tabitha. But he isn't just the bearer of bad news: Reynard has something else up his sleeve as well.
They will see us waving from such great heights
'Come down now,' they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away
'Come down now,' but we'll stay
(The Postal Service)
Leschi was one of those little mountain pass towns that grew up alongside the railroad during the turn of the century. It might have flourished for awhile in its own dinky, small-potatoes sort of way, but then promptly started attracting nothing but old folks and antiques shops the second the railways stopped serving as the primary means of transport and shipping.
When I'd lived in Winthrop, this sort of town had always been the object of my derision. Why live in a hole in the wall like Leschi when you could live in a godsdamn metropolis_like Winthrop? I mean look: we had a population of nearly 2,000 at last census _and_a five-story building in our downtown. Beat _that shit.
Well, then a girl who could sit on that building like a barstool had shown up and I'd had to go and fall in love with her and then run away with her. Now, a silly little town such as Leschi was a fucking gods-send.
The cashier at the Leschi Corner Market (so named probably because there appeared to be only one corner in Leschi), a grizzled old beaver, raised his eyebrow at me as I unloaded the contents of my shopping basket onto the checkout counter. He rang everything up, managing to look more disapproving with each item. It really was quite a talent.
To be perfectly honest, I didn't understand why he was so unimpressed with my food choices. All I had was sandwich fixings, a couple loaves of bread, some juice, and some pasta. Oh, and I'd bought out his entire stock of Snickers bars.
What could I say? Tabitha _really_liked those things. And she usually gave me a hard time about buying "real food" unless I brought a peace offering back with me. It was going to be a long evening of unwrapping candy wrappers for her, that much was certain. Better than her usual threats to be added to the menu whenever I whined about the nightly selection of game meat.
I'd come to expect at least one off-color joke a day from the giantess. If I wasn't going to be her dinner, I was alternately destined to be her toothbrush, Q-tip, or--gods forbid--a feminine hygiene product of some sort. Shudder. I just had to chalk it up to, well, Tab being Tab, I supposed.
In the weeks since we'd started our Grand Wilderness Adventure of Necessity, Tabitha had become quite the little (er, gigantic) huntress. Granted, it was probably a pretty easy task when all you had to do was grab a feral deer and snap its neck between your fingers. But that's just a guess. The ferretess always insisted that there was more finesse to it. I didn't really care, just so long as we had something to eat at the end of the day.
All the same, endless parades of burnt venison get old. There may come a day when I would learn how to roast things over a campfire, but it is not this day. Hence the trips into town whenever we're nearby and I can risk it. A ninety-foot ferretess might attract plenty of attention waltzing into town, but a nondescript five-foot-ten mink was a different thing entirely. Easy for me to be incognito, all things considered. I was good at blending in.
"Thirty-six forty,"
"Huh?"
"That'll be $36.40, son," the beaver cleared his throat.
"Oh, yeah," I blinked, returning to reality and digging through my pockets.
I paid and left, stopping outside to transfer the paper bags into my rucksack. As I made my way toward the town limits, the ringing of an old pay phone by the side of the road caught my attention. For one thing, I hadn't known anyone still used payphones. Leschi is fucking weird that way. For another, I had no idea you could make calls to payphones.
Baffled, I hesitated before crossing over to the booth and picking up the phone.
"Er, hello?"
"Ciaran?"
"Speaking... Who is this?"
"It's Reynard!"
"Er, who?"
"Oh, yeah. Introductions. I'm Warren's brother's boyfriend. He's asked me to come out and pay you a visit,"
"Okay...?"
Good gods. Was I going to be meeting Warren's grandmother's cousin's masseuse any time soon? Seemed like I would eventually be granted the distinct, er, pleasure of meeting his entire extended family. And then some. And what the fuck kind of name was Reynard?
"Listen. Are you in Leschi? Of course you are. How could you answer the phone otherwise? Why am I even asking that?"
"How... how did you know..."
"Warren's in MX4, silly. He knows everything. No worries. Your secret is safe with me. Do you have the afternoon free? What do you say we meet up at Tiffany's Waffle House in a half hour. Seems like the only place to get a bite to eat in this place. My treat,"
"Well..."
"Excellent. See you then,"
Even more confused than when I'd picked up the phone, I replaced the receiver. Scratching my head in bafflement, I shrugged. Guess I'd be having lunch at Tiffany's. Wherever that was.
*****
"You can slow down a bit, you know," the arctic fox smiled good-naturedly across the table at me. "It's not going to run away from you or anything,"
I glanced up from the omelet that I was busy inhaling. "Thanks Reynard. This is the best thing I've eaten in weeks,"
Reynard snorted. "Seeing as how much you're running up the bill, you better be enjoying it,"
The tips of my ears tinged pink as I glanced at the building stack of dishes arrayed around my side of the table. "Sorry,"
"Hey, no worries, dude. Do what you gotta do. Now, down to business,"
I finished chewing, looking over at the arctic fox. His expression was completely unreadable. "Did you guys find out how to make Tab normal again?"
Reynard's expression shifted immeasurably.
"Warren and Roger are working on that as hard as they can," he said. "I swear. But nothing yet. Yet.
"I have a very important message to relay. Warren's busy and Roger, well..." Reynard's ears drooped slightly. Shaking his head, he refocused on me. "But listen. I know Warren told you to come to Saaduuts. But it's not safe there. If you and Tab show up there, we're afraid your pursuers will be on her tail faster than you can blink,"
"But that's our only hope for anything!" I burst out, dropping my fork with a clatter onto my plate. "We can't just live out there in the wilderness forever!"
Reynard pursed his lips, thinking. "Okay. I see your point. Right. Once you get near Saaduuts, get in touch with me or Warren. Someone you can trust. We'll work something out. But keep a low profile. Please,"
I nodded numbly. He was right. How could I have been so stupid? Of course Saaduuts wasn't an option. Too obvious. Too crowded. How could I have not seen that before?
"Reynard, what am I supposed to do? I don't know what I'm doing. I haven't had a clue since Tab and I left Winthrop. It's so scary,"
I refused to cry, but my eyes were watering nonetheless. Reynard smiled warmly, sliding around the booth so that he was sitting right next to me. His warm, comforting arm wrapped around my shoulders and he pulled me closer.
"I know. It's okay. I know,"
I sniffled. No, he didn't know. He didn't know what it was like to love someone dearly but not be able to really show her how much you did. He didn't know what it was like to be scared to go home at night because your father might hit you. He didn't know what it was like to be barely an adult and thrust out into the world, utterly alone.
"But you don't, really..." I whispered.
"Can I tell you a secret?" Reynard swallowed nervously before leaning forward to murmur in my ear. His tone was reassuring, so warm, so comforting. "Maybe I don't fully know what it's like to be in your shoes, Ciaran. But perhaps I can understand a little better than most.
"My home situation wasn't all that peachy growing up, either. Dad wasn't really there all that much. And when he was, it was only to get in a good row with Mom before he peaced out for somewhere else again. Mom lived in denial of everything. She had her little illusory perfect realm, and she did her damnedest to try and force everything into that frame.
"To say that I didn't fit in her perfect little world would be putting it lightly. For one thing, I had no desire to follow in my father's footsteps and work as a godsdamn travelling salesman. Then there was the whole matter that I wasn't entirely straight. Really didn't gel with the whole framework Mom was trying so desperately to put together,"
Reynard leaned back, running his fingers through his hair and staring at the ceiling. When he looked back at me, his eyes were moist.
"It was spring and I was a junior in high school. We were at some shitty pasta place--Dad had made some big sale or other and Mom had decided it was time to celebrate his achievement. They'd even let me order a somewhat expensive dish.
"Being the stupid fucking idiot I am, I decided to take the opportunity to tell my parents that I liked girls, yeah, but I also liked boys. At the time, they seemed so happy. For once. Genuinely happy, not the pleasant but strained façades they usually pasted on when in public. It would be all right.
"Except no, it wouldn't be. As soon as the words had slipped out of my mouth, my mother started sobbing hysterically. Her ability to turn on the waterworks in an instant was mystifying.
"Dad opted for a more direct approach, hurling his plate across the table at me. In the middle of a godsdamn restaurant. In public. Before they left--without paying the bill, I might add--I was informed that the doors of my house were no longer open to me and that was that.
"Thinking it was all some sort of sick joke, I took the bus home and showed up at the front door like a godsdamn pet feral dog. I mean, publicly disowning your son just because he doesn't discriminate what personal bits he likes seemed a bit extreme, right? I was ready to nervously laugh it all off and go back to my little room in the attic. Hell, a part of me even felt guilty for spilling the bisexual beans then: I'd ruined their evening. It was selfish of me, I figured.
"But Dad's fist at the front door seemed just about as insistent as his words in the restaurant. I slunk away from home with a black eye and no idea what to do,"
I didn't notice that I was crying a little until Reynard offered me a paper napkin, a gentle smile on his lips.
"What did you do?" I asked. "What do _I_do?"
"I found a way. It was hard, but I worked it out. Crashing at friends' places, spending the occasional night under the stars... just going with the ebb and flow of it all.
"I know you can figure things out, and I'm going to help. I promise. Just get close to Saaduuts like I said. I would come with you, but I've got something pressing... Roger... I'm just really worried about him," he said. His ears were drooping again, eyes glazing over.
I nodded slowly.
Reynard smiled again. "But look at me being all Debbie Downer. I'm here for something good, too, of course. Silly me. Listen. Do you have anything planned for Tabitha's birthday?"
I blinked. "Her birthday?"
Reynard nodded slowly, staring blankly at me with those big blue eyes. "It's today, after all..."
"She... she never said anything about it,"
Reynard laughed. "All girls are the same. You're supposed to just know birthdays and anniversaries and all that shit psychically. Or have a crazy calendar to keep track of everything. Being ninety feet tall doesn't change any of that,"
I swirled the straw around my glass of orange juice. "Well, fuck. What in the hell am I going to get her? What do I do?"
Reynard was smirking again, fishing in his coat pocket for something. He produced a small glass vial with a nondescript fluid inside. "Don't worry about it, my man. Reynard delivers,"
Taking the vial, I studied the contents. What a deliveryman. I should give her... a tiny glass of water. Good thinking there. Gift savior of the century.
"No need to rush to thank me," Reynard rolled his eyes. "Do I really need to spell everything out for you?"
"Well... what is it?"
"I figured that just because we can't make her like everyone else quite yet doesn't mean we couldn't make you like her. For a few hours, at least,"
I gaped. "What... what do you mean?"
Reynard was grinning that crafty grin of his. It seemed to be a universal fox thing, now that I thought about it.
"I have connections. What can I say? I happen to know a guy who has access to some, er, 'Giant Juice'. Crazy as that may sound. Then again, your girlfriend could carry you around in her pocket, so I suppose we need to recalibrate the whole 'crazy' scale a bit. Anyway, my associate also happens to be Warren's inside guy in helping to get your girlfriend back to a single story high. But that's beside the point,"
Shaking my head, I stared at the vial in my hand. "I... I don't know how..."
"Don't worry about that. Look. It's only gonna last 12 hours, give or take, so make it worth it. Fair warning, though. I've been told it's gonna hurt like hell when you get big. Sorry. Just how it works. At least that's what I'm told.
"Oh, and you'll probably want to take off your clothes before you drink it. They ain't growing with you, believe me, and I'm assuming you don't have that many outfits to spare,"
I blushed again.
"C'mon. You and I both know you wouldn't be wearing clothes all that long even if they did grow with you," Reynard ribbed me, grinning cheekily.
"Really. Thanks. This means a lot," I smiled, unable to stop the blush creeping into my cheeks and the tips of my ears. "Reynard... You've been better to me than I deserve,"
"Look, Ciaran. I like you a lot. You seem like a pretty nice, well-rounded fellow. But you've gotta cut this whole 'I don't deserve it' crap. Of course you do. I don't know who or what made you think otherwise, but they're fucking wrong,"
Probably sensing that I was about to say something incredibly sappy, Reynard got to his feet, tossing a couple bills on the table.
"Now, I've got to get back to Saaduuts. And you've got... stuff to do as well," the arctic fox smiled. "And remember. Offer still stands. If and when you're in Saaduuts, my door is always open. Figuratively, in Tabitha's case. Be careful,"
Smiling to myself, I followed Reynard out the door of the diner.
*****
Just call me Artemis. Cause I could fucking hunt. After just over an hour of stalking the woods for prey, I had a few handfuls of the good stuff, more than enough for dinner. It was just a matter of cooking everything.
Returning to camp, I sat down, arraying the feral deer and elk in front of me. I'd tried to prep them in the past, but only ended up shredding them. Too much delicate work. More Ciaran's end of things, something he complained endlessly about. Well, it would be an awesome present for him when he returned from his trip into Leschi. Even though it was my birthday.
A rustling in the trees at the edge of the clearing in which we'd set up camp startled me from my admiration of my catch. Shooting to my feet, I tensed up. It was _something_all right. Something big. Wait, why was I freaking out? Whatever it was, I was probably bigger. Calm the fuck down, girl. It wouldn't be anything. Probably just a--holyshitCiaran.
It was Ciaran. Except he was fucking massive. Er, fucking me-sized, to be totally honest, but that observation just didn't have quite the same ring to it. The giant mink stood unsteadily at the edge of the clearing, looking more confused than anything else. His naked body towered over its surroundings, dozens of feet of sleek black fur and taut, svelte musculature. I mean, I'd known he was an attractive devil for a while, but damn. Now I had a chance to really admire him up close and personal.
"Er... happy birthday," Ciaran mumbled bashfully, toeing the ground.
Not even bothering to wonder at how he'd become so huge, I dashed over to the mink. My arms were wrapped around him before he could react, pulling him close to myself. I was a bit shorter than him, the top of my head coming to about the base of his ear. Ciaran hugged me back, running a hand slowly down my back.
"Why are you crying, Tab?" Ciaran asked, lifting my chin with his finger and brushing away a few stray tears I hadn't even been aware I'd shed.
"I--I--it's been so long since I've looked up at someone," I sniffled.
I wanted to touch_him. It had an eternity since I'd _touched someone, really. My fingers memorized every detail of his body: his soft cheeks, his sloping shoulders, the dense fur of his chest and stomach, the gentle curve of his buttocks, his warm thighs...
Ciaran kissed me deeply. Don't get me wrong: I'd loved making out with the mink when he was a pocket-sized pipsqueak. But this was over the fucking moon. His warm lips and tongue... The sensation of his fur against my fingers as I stroked his back... This was what being a couple should feel like.
I smiled, nibbling on his lower lip playfully as I felt him unclasping my blouse. He wasn't going to get any resistance from me in that matter, that was for sure.
"I've always wanted to undress you myself," Ciaran giggled, kissing me down my neck and collarbone as I rolled my head back in pleasure.
"I wish I could do the same, but I guess you're a pre-naked giant," I replied, helping the mink undo my belt.
Down to my underwear, I grabbed Ciaran's ass, nipping his neck. His arousal was pressing into me; I grabbed it in my hand, leading him by it as I walked backwards toward the hot spring pool by which we'd made camp. We were both grinning manically.
Ciaran finished unwrapping me as I slid into the warm waters of the spring. I reclined on my back, pulling the mink down on top of me. Water sloshed everywhere as I rolled over on top of him, sitting triumphantly on his stomach. I leaned down to kiss him again, before pausing. A grin played on my lips as I looked down at the blissful mink before kissing him slowly down the length of his chest and torso.
"Be right back," I murmured.
Reaching my destination, I extended my tongue, dragging it along Ciaran's rigid length. This drew a whimper from the mink, and I grinned, closing my lips around him. Ciaran bucked as I massaged his length with my lips and tongue.
"Ouch!" he yelped as I playfully nipped at him.
"Sorry," I hastily replied through a mouthful of Ciaran.
I still had to get used to playing with only a part of my mink, rather than all of him. But it was so great. He tasted so sweet, and only got sweeter as he reached a shuddering release. Not wanting to stop, I threw myself back on top of Ciaran, our lips locking as I guided him into me.
I never wanted it to stop. Ever. I'd been madly in love with Ciaran for some time, but I'd always had to go gentle on him. Even when I'd been having a really good time, the fear that I would somehow hurt my lover kept rattling its insistent way around the back of my mind. But not anymore. We were the same size now, on equal footing. He could take everything I dished out.
I wanted to keep going until we'd tried everything I could possibly think of. And I'd been playing softball for so long since the wonderful discovery of my sexuality--a lot of ideas had occurred to me. Countless dozens of trees splintered under the weight of our bodies and more than one rock face was smashed and crumbled as we hurled one another into them. I didn't care if I had to smash the whole world under my body. I wanted to show Ciaran how fucking much I loved him.
Eventually, we collapsed into a heaving mass on the ground, reduced to merely stroking one another's fur and cooing soft nonsense into one another's ears. I buried my face in Ciaran's chest fur, drinking in the cinnamon-y scent. I'd never been able to do that with my boyfriend before. Even more than feeling amazing, it was so deliciously _normal. _ This was how everyone else felt when they were with the person they loved, and I finally got to experience that.
*****
Holy shit, Tab had fucked me six ways from Sunday. No, at least eight. She'd invented another couple days of the week just to have at it even more. I supposed I was lucky--if she'd done any of that when I was normal-sized, I probably would have died instantly.
But things had calmed down for the time being. We lay curled together, just enjoying each other's company. Not that that lasted long. Reaching over to brush a stray tree branch from my hair, Tabitha stroked my cheek with the back of her hand. Touching me seemed to be one of her new favorite pastimes since I'd shown up biggified. I supposed I didn't blame her--after spending so much time surrounded by living dolls, she had someone she could really touch.
"I'm hungry," the ferretess grinned coyly at me. "You gonna take me out to dinner?"
"Dinner?"
"Yeah! I'm hungry,"
"But... but... we're giants," I explained. Gods, that sentence sounded weird coming out of my mouth.
Undaunted, Tabitha got to her feet, offering me a hand up. "I though they were all about equal rights and stuff in this country. They couldn't deny us service or whatever," she laughed.
"I think there would be a little bit of a panic if two teenagers taller than anything else in town just wander into Leschi," I offered, dusting off my back. "Besides... clothes..."
Tabitha cast a disinterested glance in the direction of her discarded blouse and jeans before grinning deviously back at me. "A girl isn't allowed to wear her birthday suit on her birthday? Besides, where are your clothes?"
I blushed violently. "I mean, I do... but they're just really, er, little," I explained. "I stashed all my stuff over there,"
Tabitha was practically gleeful. In the past couple of weeks, being naked seemed to be one of her favorite hobbies, for whatever reason. "I guess we'll just have to dine_au naturel_, then,"
Most of my body tinged a dull red. "I don't think I'm comfortable..."
Tabitha walked around behind me, draping her arms around my neck and breathing in my ear. "Aw, come on. You're really attractive. You really are. Gotta get out of that shell. This'll be good for you,"
As Tabitha took my hand and led me away from our campsite, I knew that I wouldn't be arguing.
*****
We must have made quite the impression on Leschi: two massive mustelids, ass naked and easily taller than anything the town had to offer, making their casual way down main street. I hadn't been entirely certain how the general populace would react to our sudden arrival, but was certainly relieved to find that our greeting committee wasn't comprised entirely by cops and douchebags with rifles. Perhaps everyone was just too baffled to know how to react. We had the occasional runner to deal with (that was inevitable), but most of them just hid out in the nearest available building.
"We're not here to hurt anyone!" Ciaran mumbled nervously, mincing (yes, mincing) his way after me. "Don't worry! I promise!"
The trip to Leschi had been spent instructing the mink on basic etiquette. I tried to keep him calm and showed him how to deal with small things--how to avoid smashing up pavement and concrete too much, all that sort of thing.
I rolled my eyes, focusing instead on finding a restaurant that sounded good. It was kind of difficult when none of the buildings reached past my shins and all the signs were written for folks who measured their heights in the single digits.
Stooping down, I leaned over so that I was peering through the windows of a pasta place. I tapped my fingertip against the glass, trying my hardest not to break it. I cursed inwardly as it cracked a bit, but fortunately the window held.
After a few moments of silence, a lemur stumbled out the front door. He stood braced against the doorway, staring at me with wide eyes.
"C-can I help you with something, ma'am?" he stammered.
I smiled warmly. "Hey, no worries, dude. We aren't going to do anything to you. Just wondering if we could trouble you with some dinner,"
The lemur blinked a few times before disappearing back into the restaurant. He re-emerged a few minutes later accompanied an older badger, who seemed equally baffled and dazed by the whole situation.
"I believe we have enough linguine to make something for the two of you, if that's agreeable," the badger said timidly.
I nodded eagerly.
"I can bring by money for everything tomorrow," Ciaran chipped in, leaning over my shoulder.
There was a vacant lot behind the restaurant, the perfect dining room for guests of our stature. Ciaran picked his way slowly around the building, trying to squeeze through a shin-high alleyway that was barely wide enough to accommodate his feet. I opted for a much more direct approach, stepping clear over the building in a single stride. I was always a fan of shortcuts.
We were seated in the grassy field. After a surprisingly short interval of time, several heaping platters of steaming, saucy pasta were brought out to us. They'd lashed several packing pallets together as makeshift plates, piling mounds of pasta onto them.
"Cute," I laughed as the plates were set down by several exhausted waiters. It wasn't like I was expecting their finest china.
Leaning my back against Ciaran's side, I hauled the plate-pallet onto my knees. We supped in silence for a few minutes, shoveling the rich, delicious noodles into our mouths by the handful.
"I love you," Ciaran broke the silence.
"I do too!" I craned my neck backwards to give him a peck on the cheek.
"It's so different though. Now that we're the... the same. For awhile, at least," Ciaran murmured, setting aside his empty 'plate'. "This whole giant thing is so weird. Everything's all so little. We just got served dinner by a bunch of... action figures,"
I laughed aloud. "You really have a way with words, Ciaran. Ever considered a career in as a poet or author or something?" I shifted again, hugging my knees to my chest as I rested against my boyfriend. "But it is. I don't think I've ever gotten used to it. I don't think I ever could. I mean, it's not normal. But you've helped me to feel normal, at least a little,"
Ciaran was smiling. He reached over, uprooting a sapling and stripping it of its branches before idly picking his teeth with trunk.
"I pretty much just wanted to see if I could do that," he mumbled bashfully. "But Tab. How did we get here? I mean, you've never really told me anything about _before. _ Why did you come to Winthrop, of all places? I'm really glad you did, but it seems a bit, er, random,"
A million emotions bubbled up to my chest in an instant.
"It's... it's a lot," I sighed at length. "My family and I lived in Colville when I... got large. Have you ever been there? No? It's nice. Not much, but nice. Northeastern Pacifica, near the mountains and stuff. I was really happy. Mom and Dad... nice school... track meets... graduation in a few months and then college pretty soon thereafter... It was nice.
"But then I grew to be a giantess. There was no warning, no reason. It just... _happened_out of the blue. I don't remember what I was thinking when it happened, or much of the first few days, for that matter. It's all a blur of fear and confusion and anger now.
"When it was clear that my situation wasn't temporary, I tried to put my best oversized foot forward. Maybe all my peers could get over the fact that I was taller than the school building and just pick up where we'd left off.
"I'd never been super popular, but I suppose I was decently well enough liked, and I had some really nice friends. They'd be able to look past my stature. We could still hang out and talk and have fun. Maybe I could even save them gas money on occasion. Give them a lift and stuff, you know?
"I should have remembered that it was high school I was talking about. I was a freak. A gigantic, scary freak. And therefore I didn't belong. Nobody would talk to me, and that was the best end of the spectrum. Do you have any idea how ridiculously surreal it is to be intimidated by someone not even the size of your palm?
"Mom and Dad tried their best. They really did. But I didn't exactly make the best case for myself. Rather than being a demure little ferretess, I lashed out. Giantesses were supposed to be mean and stuff, right? So I tried to act the part and let my mouth run a lot more than it probably should.
"Incident after incident built up into an epic battle in the form of a PTA meeting dedicated solely to me and what to do. My parents fought it out, but in the end, I was expelled. We had no choice to close up shop and move elsewhere, somewhere they could wipe the slate clean. Tabula rasa and all that shit. Winthrop just happened to be convenient. And I'm really happy we went there.
"I am too," Ciaran returned my smile. He glanced nervously around us. "But maybe we should go back to the campsite. I think we're freaking everyone out,"
"They're just jealous they aren't half as sexy as you are," I giggled, but got to my feet, pulling the mink up with me. "But fine. Let's go,"
I cast a final glance around the immediate vicinity. "Oh, and if anyone spills the beans about the fact that we were here, I'm gonna come back and, I dunno, eat you or something," I teased loudly.
Ciaran cast me a reproachful look. "Don't joke like that. It isn't funny,"
"C'mon! Lighten up a little, big guy," I smacked Ciaran playfully on the shoulder.
Ciaran brushed my hand away. "No. Not about that. You can't make jokes like that. Not after what you did at the compound... what happened,"
Oh, was that how things were going to be? No matter what happened, that dark cloud would be hanging over my head in Ciaran's book. He'd always think of me as a murderess, at least in part. As if my own guilt wasn't enough.
Unable to respond, I turned on my heels and stormed away from Ciaran and Leschi. I could hear his heavy footfalls as he rushed after me, but I paid him no heed. We were all the way back at the campsite before I spun around and confronted him.
"Is this what it's always going to be like? Are we going to always walk on eggshells around that? I've already apologized a million times. I can't ever make it un-happen. But we can move on. I thought you wanted to. Fuck knows I want to. I already had,"
"Could you please put the tree down? Fuck, that sounds weird," Ciaran held out a hand.
I numbly dropped the small pine I'd been brandishing--funny, I couldn't remember ever picking it up.
"I just don't think it's appropriate. You tease me all the time, but that's different. You just can't do that. You're not a monster. But you can't just act like that around people. Look at us: we're huge. We can't just do whatever we want. Being big isn't just some free pass. You have to think, be responsible,"
"Oh, that's really easy for you to say!" I snapped shrilly. "You aren't stuck like this. Nope. Tomorrow morning, you're going to be right back to normal. This is just a nice little diversion for you. This isn't your life. But by all means, keep on preaching. Here, I'll make you a soap box,"
I disdainfully kicked over a loose boulder, scowling at my boyfriend.
"Don't push me away. I'm just saying that you need to think, Tab. I want things to be better for you. But you have to want that, too,"
"And you know what's better for me because what? You've got some fucking PhD in psychology? Because you've been a giant for half a day? Fuck you! Go away. I hate you," I was sobbing openly.
"You don't hate me. And I don't hate you. Please. Don't push me away. I need you so much closer. I need you so much closer,"
I made a weak attempt at pushing Ciaran away, but his arms were around me, cradling me, stroking me.
Angry sex was more intense than anything I could have possibly imagined. Ciaran had always been a passionate lover, but now he was fucking feral.
Afterwards, I lay sprawled across Ciaran, stroking his chest fur. I wanted to be angry with him still, but I was reeling in too much pleasure to continue.
"If that's how our fights are gonna end, could we agree to have more?" I murmured.
"I shouldn't have been so hard on you like that," Ciaran sighed.
"Oh I don't mind you being hard on me at all," I teased.
"You know what I mean," the mink blustered. "But really. I didn't need to remind you of that. I guess it's just... I think I'm afraid of myself right now.
"I feel so powerful for the first time. At home, I was always so scared. My dad hurt_me. Mom ignored me. They both resented me, I think. But when I took that vial, I felt like I could _do something. Take charge. I felt like I could get back at my dad. Hurt him.
"And that scared me. I was scared of what I felt like I could do, what I wanted to do. I didn't mean to lash out at you like that. I'm sorry,"
I smiled tenderly, rubbing my cheek against his. "Don't be. And you are strong. Not just because you're big. Because you're... you.
"Standing up for yourself and leaving like you did took courage. Coming with me even though I gave you no reason to took courage. You're the bravest, strongest, most powerful guy I know. Even if you are a pipsqueak,"
"Me and everyone else," Ciaran snorted, but he was smiling widely.
A wide yawn split his smile and I busted up laughing. "It must be 9 o'clock in the evening. Way past your bedtime, young man,"
"Shut up. It's been a long day,"
"Damn right,"
We drifted off blissfully, cradled in each other's arms. I was happy. Even if I was stuck a giantess forever, in some weird way, this day of bizarre 'normalcy' had made it all okay. Just a little bit. But enough.