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Chapter 24: The Secret Pup

The night before they were to finally enter the sun village, Kilyan was startled when he was awoken by Avi. His bright green eyes fluttered open to find her gazing down at him, crouched over his sleeping furs with her shapely little thighs apart around her cock and pussy. Her wings were fluttering in her agitation and her brows were knit together. Kilyan sat up and she sat back on her heels and bit her lip, those black ears going down.

"What's the matter?" Kilyan asked, pushing his black mane back out of his eyes.

Avi only trembled, looking so small and lost and frightened, and without even thinking, Kilyan took her into his arms. He was saddened when she started to sob against him. He stroked her mane and started to rock her, reflecting that Avi, always so small, was such a slender thing in his arms, even now. And she smelled so good: like the wild flowers that grew in the jungle, like the heat of the misty swamp he had made love to her beside ten years ago. The scent of that place still clung to her fur, and Kilyan wondered if she hadn't often sat there, thinking of him and missing him, as surely as he sometimes sat on his post outside the summer village, thinking of her and missing her.

"We'll find her," Kilyan whispered. "Stop worrying, Avi! It scares me."

Avi continued trembling with sobs, and Kilyan wondered as he kissed her ears and her mane why she had not woken up her wife instead. Wouldn't Ryo, if Avi resented Kilyan so much, have been the better comforter? He wanted to ask this, and Avi -- as if she sensed Kilyan's bewilderment -- suddenly looked up at him and smiled through her tears.

"Avi tired of Ryo's lies," Avi explained with a miserable sniff. "Every time Avi is worried or frightened, Ryo reassure her: 'We find Wynn. Wynn is fine! Wynn will come home!' But Avi know that Ryo is only saying what she's supposed to say. Avi is queen. Would be heresy to say 'Princess Wynn is dead. We may not find her.' Heresy even for queen's mate. It's just . . . Avi want someone to hold her. No lies. No empty hope. Just hold Avi, Kilyan, and maybe she feel better."

Kilyan's ears went down to hear the sob in her voice and he suddenly pulled Avi to his chest and held her very tightly. She sighed happily and trembled, and Kilyan could tell that this time, she was trembling from joy. He felt a sudden warmth in his heart for this slender, for this beautiful creature. If only Avi could belong to him, his to hold and comfort always. If only he could have stolen her as he'd wanted to so long ago . . .

"Do you feel better?" Kilyan whispered after a long pause. Avi was still huddled in his arms, her cheek against his chest, and it had been a while since he'd felt any hot tears sliding in his fur. He was glad when she sniffed and nodded.

"Good," Kilyan whispered and kissed her head again. "Good." He heard Ryo suddenly grunt in her sleep, and fearful that she might awake and murder him for his betrayal, Kilyan started to withdraw. He heaved a miserable sigh when Avi stopped him.

"Don't let go!" Avi whispered. Kilyan saw her long lashes angle down and knew she had closed her eyes. She started to tremble again, and Kilyan felt his cheeks grow a little hot when her great pink cock started to stand upright.

"Avi," Kilyan said, unable to take his eyes off the size of that stiffening organ, ". . . are you fantasizing about us?"

Avi's eyes flew open, and Kilyan saw her cheeks flush prettily when she suddenly drew the sleeping furs over her stiff craving. She tried to twist free of Kilyan and wouldn't look at him, but Kilyan didn't let her go. He lifted her chin with his fingers and forced her to look in his eyes. Her silver cheeks were stained with tears, her black eyes were shining wetly from them, and her lips trembled with an obvious longing to be pressed to his own. She jerked her chin from his fingers with a sudden scowl and moved as if she would stand.

"This was mistake," Avi said, still trembling. "Good-night, Kilyan -- Kilyan! Let go!" Avi hissed the last words in an angry whisper, for when she attempted to climb to her feet, Kilyan suddenly grabbed her wrist. She twisted and struggled, but Kilyan smiled, knowing that she couldn't escape his grasp without hurting him with her super strength, knowing that she did not wish to make a commotion and thus awake Ryo. He pulled Avi close in his arms, and looking down into her scowl with a wise smile, he kissed her.

"You don't hate me, you want me! You've wanted me for years. You even love me -- Ryo told me so. Now stop pretending: you woke me and not Ryo for a reason, and it wasn't just because of Ryo's false hope. Was it?"

Still scowling, Avi averted her eyes.

"Was it?" Kilyan pressed, peering into her face.

Avi suddenly broke free of Kilyan with a fierce spring of her wings. Kilyan fell back on his sleeping furs, and the little queen shot to her feet. Kilyan rested back on his elbows, gazing up at her rigid body. She stood stiffly with her back to him, her arms at her sides, her little fists trembling. Kilyan thought that any moment now and she would take off into the sky. But Avi stayed where she was, and after the trembling subsided, she relaxed: her slender fingers fell loose and her wings stopped twitching out feathers and folded instead neatly behind her.

"Yes, Avi loved Kilyan," Avi whispered to the distant clouds, to the moon, to the air -- to anyone but Kilyan. Kilyan knew with a guilty pang that she couldn't even look at him. "Avi still loves Kilyan now. But there's nothing we can do about it. Avi is queen. Avi can not leave jungle, and Kilyan can not leave his family. This is the way things are. Why must Kilyan make things so difficult!"

Avi whirled suddenly and there were fresh tears in her eyes. Kilyan climbed anxiously to his feet, and frowning sadly down at her, he brushed her tears away with his thumb.

"I hurt you ten years ago," he whispered, "and here I am hurting you all over again. My little virgin princess. My little Black Ears." Kilyan smiled and Avi smiled back, her lips trembling again.

"Avi told you she loved you," Avi said, her voice almost a sob, "so many times! When we were together, Avi said, 'I love you, Kilyan!' and Kilyan looked down at her with love in his eyes. Or Avi thought it was love. Avi soon learned that it wasn't." Her voice was suddenly bitter and she took a step back from him, smacking away his paw.

Kilyan moved toward her, but she turned her back. Kilyan stopped, and his paws fell miserably at his sides. He felt so helpless, watching her pain spilling out in those tears. All this suffering, her broken heart, their lost child. He never should have taken her in the jungle that night. He never should have touched the virgin princess.

"And even though Avi hated Kilyan," she went on, speaking in a sad and reminiscent whisper, speaking to the stars. "Even though Avi hated Kilyan for a long, long time . . . she waited for him. Large with Kilyan pup, she stood on the edge of the ocean and stared at the sea, hoping that Kilyan might return. Roriana was angry at Avi for her love. Called her melancholy, called her weak. Other shemales say the same: Avi should forget Kilyan, should even abort his pup. Pup wasn't of the pure tribe, pup had come of outsider. But Avi didn't listen. Avi had Wynn because in a way . . . it was like having a piece of Kilyan."

Unable to stand it any longer, Kilyan moved close to Avi and put his paw on her shoulder. He was glad when Avi did not shrug him off. She seemed too engrossed in her story to do so. Her lashes fluttered at his touch, but she went on in a distant sort of voice, the sorrow of ten years ago resurfacing in her eyes.

"Avi didn't understand herself any more than the other shemales did. How could Avi love Kilyan? Avi had only known him a few days! But Avi was young, a silly little girl. Sixteen. There was no telling Avi that she wasn't in love! And Avi was so lonely . . . had been destined to marry Ryo from childhood. Ryo is good, strong wolf . . . but Avi had never really loved her, not any more than a friend. Avi wanted more. She found more when Kilyan came to jungle. Avi even thought Kilyan might take her away with him."

"I wanted to. You know I wanted to."

"Did Kilyan think of Avi at all?" Avi whispered, holding herself. "Did Kilyan ever miss her? Other shemales said he had probably forgotten Avi. Said he had used her."

"You know I missed you. You know I wanted you!" Kilyan suddenly wrapped her in his arms, his hard chest and rippling belly pressed to her slender back. Avi shivered in the warmth of his strong arms and closed her eyes when he kissed away her sudden flow of tears.

"Avi always thought of Kilyan. Avi told Wynn stories of her father. Avi thought it was fair if child knew the truth. Roriana and Ryo didn't like it, but Avi told Wynn what father look like, his name, where he from. Wynn loved Kilyan without ever even meeting him." She laughed softly to herself, and Kilyan smiled sadly.

"I always thought of you too. That's what I was trying to tell you before! I even dreamt about you, of holding you, of having you with me in my bed. It always seemed to me as if you should have been there snuggled in with me and my wives. And how I would have loved to have Wynn with my boys. She would have been like a breath of fresh air after having two sons. A quiet, clean little girl in the house. Lea would have adored her."

"Kilyan mate?"

Kilyan nodded, his cheek rubbing against Avi's mane as he thought with a smile of his beautiful wives. "And Ohana. My wives. They weren't too happy about those marks you left on my shoulders."

Avi laughed softly to herself, remembering that night so long ago when Kilyan had sucked her cock, and she, in a state of ecstasy, had clenched his shoulders tight, cutting him.

After a pause, Kilyan said into her ear, "Avi, I'm going to ask you something --"

"Don't ask," Avi said flatly. "Because the answer is no."

Kilyan dropped his arms from Avi and watched miserably as she turned to face him. "I guess I deserve that . . ." But he wasn't surprised: she had turned him down once before. "But if you love me, why won't you come with me? You and Wynn can come back to the summer village! Forget all about the jungle --!"

Kilyan was silenced when Avi put a finger to his lips. She smiled up at him sadly and shook her head, those black ears going back flat. "What Kilyan feel is guilt. Not love. Kilyan broke Avi heart and wants to make things right. Proposing to Avi is not the answer. Avi can never leave jungle. Kilyan must understand this!" She cupped Kilyan's face with one slender paw and looked earnestly into his eyes.

Kilyan gazed down at her and realized with a miserable pang that Ryo had been right. So right. He could never have Avi again. Perhaps he'd never had her in the first place.

Kilyan took her paw and kissed it. "Then what can I do? Tell me. I'll do it."

Avi smiled up at him warmly and how it made his heart leap!

"Help Avi find Wynn!" Avi implored with large black eyes. "That's all Avi asks of Kilyan."

Kilyan shook his head. "I'm already doing that," he said with a smile. "Ask for something else. Something that can fix this --" He laid his paw flat against her chest, just above her breast. "This precious thing that I broke."

"Kilyan already fixed that," Avi said with a little smile, "when he looked at Avi with green eyes that said he cared. When he looked at Avi with worry. When he looked at Avi with . . ."

"Love?"

"Don't say that. You don't love Avi!" Avi smacked Kilyan's paw away again.

"You know I do, goddamn it! You know I do!"

"Kilyan, d-don't --!"

Kilyan snatched Avi into his arms and his paws were suddenly everywhere on her body: sinking in her sex -- so wet and dripping and hot -- squeezing her breasts, clutching her buttocks, even grabbing at that soft shemale cock. Kilyan was shocked by just how frantic and urgent Avi was in return: her arms flew around his neck and her paws rumpled his mane as their lips came together, muffling their moans and cries, muffling their whispers as they hissed them to each other, as they confessed their desires.

"Oh, god," Kilyan whispered when he sank himself inside. Avi's walls contracted around him, squeezing and sucking. Her hot little thighs clenched tight around his hips and he fell to his knees with her right in his lap. Their rapid kisses continued, then Kilyan took Avi's buttocks in fistfuls and started working her up and down on his cock. Her shrill little gasps of ecstasy grew louder and louder until -- afraid that Ryo might suddenly wake -- Kilyan closed his mouth over hers and filled it with his tongue. Avi gave her tongue back, groaning with Kilyan, whimpering her pleasure as Kilyan lifted her up and down with strong, urgent paws. He loved the feel of her breasts slapping against him, loved the hot taste of her mouth and her soft little cries as he worked her in his lap until she was trembling with an orgasm.

"Oh, Kilyan -- yes! Deeper!" Avi whispered, clinging so tightly to his back that he felt new nail marks taking shape in his fur. But he suddenly didn't care: Avi was in his lap, was on his cock, and she was whispering that she loved him, had always loved him. Breathless and blushing, her breasts heaving, her mane in her eyes, she closed her mouth over Kilyan's again and gave him her tongue.

God, it was all too much. Kilyan pinned Avi down and started slamming himself in now. Avi arched her back against the ground and moaned, wriggling and gasping under him, her breasts riding with his thrusts as he hunched his back to get inside. He put her leg on his shoulder and drove himself deeply. She was so tight and strong around him, so clenching and greedy, just like his Ohana. And he felt himself throbbing thicker and hotter until it happened: he lost control and spilled his passion. Avi came too: her hot fluids gushed over Kilyan, and he slumped on top of her. They both panted to catch their breath, and Kilyan showered Avi's face and neck with happy, lazy kisses.

"You love me," he accused, "and I love you. Come back with me!"

"No, Kilyan. It's selfish! Selfish and childish!"

Kilyan dropped his face miserably in Avi's neck and felt soothed when she started stroking his mane. He lay on top of her, making sure to keep his weight shifted to one side so he did not crush her, and he closed his eyes as she lovingly stroked his mane and grazed the tips of her black nails along the tight muscles of his back. He had to admit that she was right: it was selfish to ask such a thing of her, selfish to not only take her from her duties as queen but to break Ryo's heart in the process. He whispered an apology and Avi smiled and kissed his head.

"I love you, Avi," Kilyan whispered miserably, helplessly. He felt her cheek bulge against the top of his head and knew she was smiling.

"Avi knows Kilyan does. Kilyan has no idea how happy it makes Avi, knowing that he cares."

"And yet, we still can't be together."

"That's right," Avi quietly confirmed.

"Then . . . I swear to you that I won't bring it up again . . . but, Avi, I have to admit . . ." Kilyan lifted his head and gazed down at her worriedly. "After all this is over, I don't know how I'm just going to go back to my life and forget all about you. And you know you won't forget about me!"

Avi was silent for a moment as she gazed up at Kilyan. Her black eyes were loving and affectionate and sent a thrill of warm joy to Kilyan's heart. If only she would be his wife, if only she would come back with him and look at him with those black eyes the rest of his life!

"Would Kilyan like to have Wynn?" Avi asked at last.

Kilyan's ears pricked forward in his surprise. "You would do that?"

"Yes. Wynn has always been very miserable in the jungle, she felt like outcast. Maybe she needs her father. And if having Wynn would make Kilyan happy, Wynn could live with Kilyan. But only for a little while. A few years, maybe. Then Avi come back for her. Avi need heir of jungle." She paused and added in a sad whisper, "Ryo and Avi never able to have pup of their own."

Kilyan gazed down at her, silently reflecting: yet another reason for Ryo to resent him.

"Would you like to have another pup?" Kilyan whispered to her. "One to rule the jungle after you?"

Kilyan hovered over her, his weight on one arm, and his green eyes were warm and intense when he lovingly brushed her mane back from her face. Avi blushed as his meaning became clear.

"That way I could keep a piece of you . . . and you could keep a piece of me." Kilyan traced his finger lightly over Avi's lips and waited for an answer.

Avi's lashes were fluttering. Kilyan smiled: she was the blushing virgin princess all over again. He kissed her slowly on the lips and asked again between these tender kisses, "Would you?"

Their lips smacked as they continued kissing. Their mouths lightly touched and then pulled away, slowly becoming more deep and intense until their tongues were pushing against each other. Kilyan pulled back and kissed Avi's cheek. She was trembling again, and reaching down between her thighs, he slipped his fingers in her sex and pinched them in her juices: she was getting wet all over again.

"Y-Yes," Avi admitted, her lips trembling as they brushed against Kilyan's. She felt his fingers suddenly massaging the inner rim of her vagina and let out a little moan.

Kilyan kissed her again, and reaching down between the heat of their bodies, he started stroking Avi's cock even as he sank himself between the swollen lips of her sex. Avi was paralyzed for a moment as the waves of pleasure hit her: Kilyan was fucking her deeply and slowly in her pussy and at the same time, he was stroking her cock. She became hard in his paw almost instantly and blushed her embarrassment at the fact, but Kilyan only smiled lovingly at her and continued to please her. She wreathed and groaned under him, gasping and sighing, whispering his name. Still stroking her cock, Kilyan moved himself inside of Avi in a slow, ceaseless rhythm. He kissed her lips, her neck, and feeling her juices gushing over him yet again, he closed his eyes and whispered to himself, "Oh, god, yes . . ." He grimaced and came a second time, and Avi's thick cock flinched in his paw and released its seed over Kilyan's fingers. Kilyan sagged on top of her again, breathless and happily tired. He closed his eyes, loving the feel of Avi's breasts heaving under him, the heat of her pussy walls around his softening cock.

"What will you name this one?" Kilyan wondered with a smile. There was no answer. "Avi?" He lifted his head: Avi was biting her lip. She was worried.

"What if second pup is outcast too?"

"Then we'll try again in another ten years."

Avi laughed in spite of herself. "Kilyan! It's not funny. A shemale must rule the jungle in Avi place, not a female."

"Sounds to me," said Kilyan slowly, "as if your shemales need to learn something about the outside world. Maybe then they wouldn't hate and fear wolves who aren't like them. Not every male or female is like me, you know," Kilyan joked, giving Avi a half-smile.

Avi smiled back and stroked his mane. "Kilyan is right," she said thoughtfully. "Maybe Avi should start to build relations with other villages. Then shemales might accept next heir. Kilyan give good advice. Would have made good mate."

"For what it's worth, you would have too."

They smiled into each other's eyes, and when they kissed, Kilyan felt a tiny piece of his heart chip away. He had rejected Avi ten years ago, and now here she was rejecting him. Feeling a little dismal, he rested his head once again on Avi's breasts and closed his eyes, relishing in the touch of her slender fingers in his mane. He closed his paw over her breast and flexed his fingers in its softness, then passed his thumb over that jutting little nipple. He let his tongue flicker out and lick it, and he heard Avi draw in a sharp breath. Kilyan then cupped his paw under and hefted her breast, gently smacking it. It jiggled hard near his face, the nipple standing out even harder, and he suddenly lifted his head and closed his lips over it. His fingers sank in her sex again, and he loved the feel of her hot little thighs twisting against him, as if to stop him. But she had come to him, not the other way around, and there was no going back now.

Kilyan sank his fingers deeper, loving the sight of Avi's gasping lips, her fluttering lashes. And still fingering her deeply, he closed his mouth over hers. She came another time: her breasts thrust out toward the sky, and with her legs wide open, her glossy juices spilled over Kilyan's fingers.

"Oh, Kilyan, Avi can't take it!" Avi whispered desperately when Kilyan not only kept fingering her pussy but started massaging her thick cock as well. That pink sweet-smelling shaft throbbed upright and he saw pre-cum drip from it. Delighting in his ability to please Avi so well, Kilyan lightly licked the pre-cum from her head and loved it when she suddenly sat up on her elbows, almost as if to stop him. She was blushing and breathless, her big breasts were heaving with her gasps, and her brows were knit together above her suffering eyes.

Smiling down at her, Kilyan spread Avi's legs wider. She blushed a deeper shade and stammered a protest: her cock was so hard and throbbing now he thought she would explode. It flinched the deeper he sank his fingers in her pussy, and how her breasts just trembled! She was so slender and beautiful, lying back on her elbows, helpless and blushing and embarrassed by her own passion, her obvious desire for him.

He leaned down between her thighs, and ignoring the sudden look of alarm on her face, he sank his lips slowly over her shaft. Avi let out a shrill gasp as Kilyan's mouth closed wet and hot down over her cock. He knew how to please her because he knew just how he himself liked to be sucked, and besides, it wasn't the first time he had ever pleased his Black Ears. He sucked Avi in deep, wet strokes, his tongue flexing against her throbbing shaft, his fingers still caressing the squirming walls of her pussy. She wriggled and sighed and begged him to stop, then begged him not to stop, then thrust out her breasts and let her head fall back with a choked cry. Kilyan choked a little as her cum filled his mouth, so hot and wet and as delicious as the juices of a pussy. He swallowed her cum and licked lovingly at her softening organ as it slumped again over her pussy lips.

Still breathless and red in the face, Avi flopped on her back and closed her wings around her shoulders in her embarrassment. Kilyan gathered to his chest, and she folded her wings back, snuggling her head into his neck.

"Oh, Kilyan," Avi whispered, breathless and incredulous. "No one has ever give Avi . . . such deep . . . pleasure . . ."

"Good," Kilyan whispered back and kissed her head.

They lay there snuggled together for a long while, and locked to Kilyan's hard chest, Avi struggled to ignore the tingling pleasure that was still tormenting her cock. Every now and then, Kilyan would lovingly kiss her head or stroke her mane, and Avi would close her eyes and smile, feeling very content.

"Avi will name next pup Elora," Avi said presently.

"Hmm. That's pretty."

"It old shemale name. It mean 'secret'."

Kilyan looked down and they grinned at each other. Their secret pup that they were making here under the stars! He placed his paw lovingly over Avi's womb, remembering with a happy leap of his heart when Lea was pregnant with Roan. He had often placed his paw on her belly at night and felt the pup's gentle squirming. And later, when Ohana was pregnant with Zane, he had done the same only to feel Zane's energetic bucking. How he wished he could be there to place his paw over Avi's womb as Elora grew inside of her! When he said as much, Avi kissed his lips and wrapped his neck in her arms.

"First let's worry about our first secret pup. Once Wynn is here in Avi arms, then Kilyan can worry about Elora."

Kilyan sighed sadly. "Tell me about her," he said, holding her close against him. "About Wynn. Does she have your super strength?" He asked the last part with a little smile.

Avi smiled too. "Yes, Wynn does. Wynn could lift big stones when she was a little pup. Avi was very happy about this: at least Wynn was strong, even if she wasn't shemale. No one could deny that. Wynn looks like her father: she is black wolf with pale green eyes and a long, black mane that Avi used to keep in two braids. But she has silver ears, our Wynn, and every time she smiles . . . Avi see Kilyan looking out at her."

"I bet I'd see a little of you in her, Avi, when she smiles. Especially since she has your silver fur in her ears." He stroked the fur on Avi's arm affectionately.

"Wynn was always very curious and a little wild," Avi went on, and Kilyan immediately thought of Zalia. "Avi often had to punish her for breaking the customs. Avi and Ryo once had to spank her for wandering into the jungle and not returning for five days. We were so worried. She had tried to runaway but got lost. Avi and Ryo should have taken it as a warning sign," Avi added grimly. "She was always a headstrong child, and the shemales always said Wynn would never make good queen. It hurt Avi every time to hear such a thing. Even Ryo would say so from time to time, that Wynn is not cut out to rule, that we should try for our own pup. But Ryo could never give Avi a pup. And so all our hopes rested on Wynn."

"Bet she felt really pressured, poor kid," Kilyan said sadly.

Avi nodded. "Avi never realized until Wynn disappeared how pressured she felt. Avi didn't mean to push her. Avi just wanted her to prove the shemales wrong, to make Wynn the best queen they'd ever had. But Avi was wrong to push her. Avi see that clearly now. Avi doesn't blame Wynn for running away. Avi would have too . . ."

"No, Avi, don't beat yourself up," Kilyan gently scolded. "You're her mother and you did the best you could for her! Parents make mistakes, we do that just like anyone else! And be glad you only had one female pup. I have two teenage boys at home. Wynn's not even a teenager yet."

Avi squeezed Kilyan gratefully in her arms, then said it was getting very late: she wanted to rest now. Kilyan let her up and watched fondly as she went to her sleeping furs. She paused to look at him as she was climbing in, the black eyes dancing warmly over his face.

"Avi glad she came to see Kilyan. Avi thinks that deep down . . . she needed to."

"I think I needed you to."

They smiled at each other, then Avi climbed in her sleeping furs and went to sleep.

Kilyan took his turn for watch, and as he sat around the fire, he couldn't stop himself thinking of his children: of Wynn, who was lost, and of Elora, who may or may not have been conceived this starry night. He silently vowed to himself that come hell or high water, they would find Wynn and he would take her home and love her and keep her safe always. And some way or other, he would convince Avi to at least let their second secret pup visit him. It was bad enough he hadn't been there for Wynn. He wanted to be there for Elora, at least. He wanted to see his little girls grow into females. He hoped to god that Elora would come out looking like Avi: at least then they could pass her off as belonging to Ryo. And if Elora was a shemale, it would make her life in the jungle so much easier than Wynn's.

Smiling to himself, Kilyan rested his chin on his paws and stared at the fire. Elora. It meant secret. It was the perfect name.