Halloween Story: War
Forgot to post this from last year. ^^
I watch too much TV. Lately, riffraffcat has gotten me hooked on "MASH" again, after not seeing it in nearly 30 years. Thank you very much, Kodi and Amazon Fire TV. =P I've noticed several deleted scenes though, which is great, so I get to see the shows how they were meant. I watched this series religiously in the 70s and early 80s. The stories about the wounded and the doctors were really well done. A few even tugged at my heart-strings.
So, dear reader, enjoy this letter that could have come from any MASH unit, in any country on Earth, caring for the sick and wounded, victims of a nameless, seemingly-endless war. One extraordinary wounded soldier, and one very gifted nurse could change everything however - and not necessarily for the better. *^^
Dear Dad:
I know it's been ages since we last talked voice. Still trying to get used to the digi-phone over here. They're such a third-world country here, not much in the way of air-cars, hypers, jetties, or what have you. I write when I can though, you know that. Been meaning to send more letters too. Mom'd pitch a fit out of that, since she's always growling about the state of trees lately, and every scrap of paper we can save is a good idea. I know she means well, but damn Mom, get with the times, right? Trees are scarce but not dying out completely. I'm sure the World Otherlife Committee is hard at work on more solutions, and besides, we got that great big geodesic Life Dome out in the Pacific anyway, so Mom just needs to chill.
Things are okay here. The fighting's let up for a little bit, well, actually for a few days, and there's some talking going on that maybe a cease-fire's coming. I'd like that, because it means I can come home to you and Mom soon. I hope so. I'm so sick of this war, even more so since Daniel left.
Oh, yeah I should probably talk about him. Daniel Trayfar McGillis. You don't forget a name like that, right? For a while there, Dad, your young wolfess was trying out "Rebecca Jean McGillis" in her mind. I was that hooked on him. I saw us married, having pups, growing old together, the whole thing. But I don't want you to get too worried about losing your daughter, okay?
He's gone already. He died several weeks ago, succumbing to some chest wounds. At least, that's what the death report says anyway.
Now, Dad...I know you think your little girl is headstrong and down-to-Earth, and Lord knows you and I keep certain things from Mom when it comes to our thoughts and feelings. Remember the time I woke up in the middle of the night and told ya'll I felt something sitting down at the foot of my bed, but there wasn't anything there? I was...what, 6 or so, remember? I swore up and down for days I'd felt a ghost, and even though you believed me, I could just see Mom frowning at me over her glasses and thinking I'd crossed over into a land of Make Believe and there was no return. I love Mom, but she is so rational, that unless she sees it with her own eyes, and has a team of scientists backing up what she's seeing, she won't actually believe it.
Ghosts are nothing new to me. Hell, I still feel them even now. It's hard not to with so much death around me. Every so often a young soldier, barely old enough to drive an air-car, comes through our doors and despite all the doctors' love and caring, they just can't save him. It hurts me a lot, because I have to watch it happen, and then I feel a strange sensation passing through me. Young pups, cubs, fledglings, kits, that should be safe at home trying to cop a feel at an all-night movie instead of here fighting this war. They're here one minute and then gone the next.
And what's sadder still is, with their death, there's no fanfare, no pause, no...regret, it seems. They just cover the body, and take the stretcher away for the next case. The death report will say "killed in action", and a few scrawled notes talking about the wounds, so the undertaker stateside can decide whether or not to present the body at the wake. The families never know the fear, the longing, or even the relief from the pain that goes to them at the end.
But I do. I feel them go through me and before they go over the rainbow bridge they share with me those moments. Some linger for a few days, but only I can see them, and in my quiet time, I can talk them through and help them go over. I have to do it when no one is around, otherwise the docs and others would label me as crazy as Mom once did.
I'm a nurse here at the unit, so obviously I take offense at the way death is so haphazardly, I guess, accepted. It's a part of life. Just like this senseless war.
Well, no...I take that back, it's not senseless. Sometimes it's necessary, even a godsend.
Daniel taught me that.
I should probably talk about him since he's the whole reason I'm writing in the first place. I don't want Mom to see this letter, which is why I'm addressing it solely to you, and the way she harps on the trees, I don't expect she'll open the envelope. She hates physical letters so much. But it's not just that. You and I both know about my ability to see stuff that's not there, since I felt that ghost on my bed. I just know you're going to believe every single word I tell you.
It was late when he came in, past 00:00, that's midnight. I was just returning from a break. I had the night shift 'til 03:00 and it was pretty peaceful. A few casualties had come in, and the doctors sewed them up and sent them back out in a few hours, and now it was just me in the post-op room. I can't tell you how weird I felt. It was more than just peaceful, Dad, it was damned quiet and still. I'd normally hear sonic-jets roar overhead this time of night, or since we're about three miles from the front, maybe the distant thunder of ammunition. But I just didn't hear a sound. A few crickets chirping outside the cube, but that was it.
I started to get up to go outside to take a look around, maybe get some fresh air, and then I did hear a sound.
The high-pitched whine of an incoming ambulance.
Casualties coming in.
"Hyper!" I shouted out and lept to my feet, alerting the small medical team on duty that a Hyperion, an Army air-truck, was due in. I could tell by the sound this was one of the smaller ones that carried less than five. As I ran to pre-op, I said my usual prayer to God to keep the charges safe from further harm.
One of the orderlies brought in one lone stretcher, covered in bloody blankets, and lying prone upon it, looking weak and frail, was Daniel.
I gave the young wolf a quick glance. "Anyone else?" I asked the orderly.
"That's it, Becky. Just the one."
I nodded and breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe we'd be quiet for the rest of the night. I gazed down at this utterly handsome wolf, with piercing sky-blue eyes, black fur, and a long mane of dark brown hair to his shoulders. He looked up at me, and something like recognition crossed his face briefly, and then he was coughing blood and closing his eyes again.
"Bad chest case, but I think they got him here in time," the orderly rushed the stretcher over to the waiting area, then dialed his digi-phone for the resident chest-cutter. "Funny, he was the only one brought to the aid station. They said there's been no causalities now for several hours."
"Maybe it's a lull," I said absently as I followed, my eyes still drawn to the wounded wolf.
"Dunno how. Latest report said Gibra Hill was in play, and there was heavy fighting on both sides." I frowned. "How far is that from the aid station?"
The orderly finished taking off the wolf's blankets and I came in with a thermo-swipe to check his vitals. "Maybe a mile or less."
"Well, maybe they just haven't collected everyone yet. We could get swamped and find ourselves calling in other medical staff." I didn't much like that idea, Dad. I've talked you before about the madhouse that can ensue in the operating cube, when casualties are coming in at such a rate, we'd have ten or twelve surgeons operating at once.
No, I didn't like that idea at all. "Or maybe a cease-fire." I told him about the strange calm I'd felt and heard earlier.
"That'd be nice. Maybe we can go collect candy or something." The orderly snickered and took Daniel away for prep.
"What do you mean?" I called after him.
"It's Halloween, girl! October 31!" The doors whispered as they closed behind him.
**
I wasn't asked to assist, since it was a single casualty, and folks were pretty bored anyway, so I sat in the post-op and waited to see if the wolf would make it. I hoped so. He was incredibly cute, and a part of me was hoping I'd have a chance to talk to him at length. Soldiers have stories, Dad. Good and bad. Like the time I told you about the tiger who saved a house-full of cubs from annihilation by a retro-bomb? Or the fox who died practically in my arms telling me about his last night as a civilian, and his regret at not telling his folks he was gay. I didn't tell you this, but once a badly wounded canine told me he'd actually seen Death riding across the field in an air-jeep that spouted lightning and flames in its wake.
I wondered what story Daniel had to tell, and the way he'd looked at me earlier, when he was brought in, well, it made me think maybe we knew each other. He certainly didn't look familiar to me. Maybe an old high-school crush? I know, Dad, I'm as cute as a button to you, but I don't mind telling you I think I'm a very pretty wolfess. That dark hair you swear comes from Mom, and the brown eyes from you? And I'm eating well here and work out often at the gym cube. I look pretty hot, to be honest. I get my share of proposals for a casual night-walk or more.
Haha. Don't worry, Dad...I haven't had sex since I got here. Sex is the last thing on my mind, honest. Well...Daniel? I guess, yes, I wanted to have sex with him, even with his chest covered with bandages and a few tubes sticking from his arm, I was more than happy to lower myself down over him and let this debonair wolf have me as he would. I know you don't like hearing that, Dad, since I'm your special girl, but...I wanted him to be my first.
My only...
When he was brought into post-op an hour or so later, he looked better than he had first coming in. The fur around his face had been cleaned, and his long hair had been done up in a ponytail. He was still heavily sedated, so I doubted I'd be able to talk to him until my shift started tomorrow night. I walked over to him and watched him for a while. Just watched him until the shift-change, memorizing his beautiful face and trying to think where we might have met before.
No other casualties came that night.
**
The next day, I woke up about 11:00 and hurriedly dressed to check in on our lone patient here at MASH 2067. As I walked the short distance to the post-op cube, I again noticed the lack of battle sounds. There were a few birds singing, more crickets, and casual conversations flitting around me, but nothing dramatic, and certainly nothing that would indicate we were three miles from the front. I could have been walking through a tranquil meadow back home, it was that peaceful.
When I arrived at post-op, Daniel was still out like a light, and I was disappointed. The orderly from last night, Thomas, I think I told you about him before, was playing a game of blitz chess with one of the surgeons near the soldier's bedside.
"Still quiet, I see," I remarked, sitting down next to Daniel.
Thomas looked up. "Too quiet. Regimental says no casualties due for at least 24 to 48 hours. Aid station is...dead. Nothing coming in at all."
I bit my tongue. "Maybe a cease-fire then, like we thought."
He sighed deeply and moved his king from check. "Maybe. But they'd report that, wouldn't they?"
"Checkmate," replied the surgeon, Steven by name, and grinned up at me. "I wouldn't worry about it too much, Lieutenant Childs. Probably just reloading for a while, building up some defenses. War's a lot like chess. You have to be patient, get your men organized, covering as much ground as possible, then move in for the kill."
I frowned at that. "That may be. But no one really dies playing it, doctor."
He shrugged and then started a new game with Thomas. I reached over and caressed Daniels's arm, curious to check his blood pressure and pulse, and those remarkable blue eyes opened and looked right at me.
Dad...it really threw me for a loop. I nearly screamed.
"Doctor, he's coming around," I said anxiously and knelt by the bed. Steven and Thomas stopped playing and went into action, giving the wolf a brief once-over while I helpfully checked his vitals again.
"Welcome back to the living, soldier," the doctor smiled and took his paw. "You'll be alright. Just rest. I took a lot of shrapnel from your chest but you'll be just fine. Heart, lungs okay, no real damage. Although you might wince a bit coughing for a few months."
Daniel just looked at him steadily, and his eyes never wavered or blinked.
"So...um, just rest for now." Steven finished, petting his paw, then got up and looked at us. "Hourly check, Lt. Childs, when you go on tonight."
"Oh, I can look over him now. There's really nothing else for me to do. I-I'll even change shifts if possible." I really wanted to stay with him now.
"Alright, I'll clear it with the major, but it should be fine." For a moment, Steven looked out of sorts, disoriented, and I started to get up to see what was wrong. He looked about ready to faint. Then he was okay again. "Tom," he said slowly, "you want to go to the mess and grab a snack?"
"Love to, nothing else to do, like she said." The orderly got up and touched my shoulder. "Want anything?"
"No..." I leaned in closer to Daniel and absently stroked his arm. "I'll eat later."
I think they both realized I was hot for our young patient, because they traded knowing smiles and left.
When they were out of the cube, Daniel actually talked. "Rebecca..."
I was startled. Around the MASH unit, I was usually "Becky", so I thought maybe he'd heard my name when he was brought in somehow. But it was strange he still used my formal name.
"Um, hi," I replied sheepishly, regaining some composure. "Well, you know my name. May I have yours, Captain?"
He smiled and I gushed with renewed lust. "Daniel." His voice was low, gravely, the kind of voice you want to listen to in your ear as you're being made love to. "Daniel Trayfar McGillis."
I blushed as I realized I was still slowly stroking his arm, but I didn't stop. "Rebecca Jean Mc...I mean, Childs." I giggled sweetly and his paw came up to rest on mine. Every nerve in me tingled. I wanted to make love with him. I wanted to undress, slip under the sheets, reach for his pounding member, and take him inside me.
Sorry, Dad...
"You have a gentle soul, Lt. Childs."
"Oh, please...um, Becky is fine."
"I like Rebecca. It's prettier."
Yes, I was mentally unbuttoning my top at this point. I finally let go of his arm and realized my heart was pounding. Under my clothes, my scent coated my sex like warm dew. "Um...I...I like Daniel."
"Rebecca. I haven't really time to explain everything but...I need you to do something for me."
Oh, Dad, here it comes, I thought. Maybe a kiss? A little fondle under the sheets, gripping him in my paw and giving him a nice post-op climax? Maybe even ask me to show him my breasts?
I was completely stunned by what he said next. "I need you to kill me."
"What?" I was sure I'd misheard. Maybe he'd meant to say "kiss me", and I was fully prepared to give that wolf the deepest, most passionate tongue-kiss imaginable. I even moved my head close to his, until his face filled my vision.
"I need you to kill me. Right now..."
I frowned and pulled my head away. "What are you talking about? Didn't you hear the doctor? Your wounds were mostly-"
"It has nothing to do with my bodily state, Lt. Childs. I'm quite sound, both body and mind. I searched your soul when I was brought here. It has to be you."
Now I was perplexed. "What has to be me? I...I don't understand."
"Have there been any other casualties since me?"
I blinked a few times. "Well, no...it's been very quiet."
Daniel nodded and folded his paws on his chest, sighing deeply. "Then you have to kill me. The sooner the better. I wasn't supposed to survive."
"What are you saying?!" I reached for and held his paw tightly. "Daniel, please. Enough of this death-wishing. You're going to be fine, don't you understand? I want..." I licked my lips. "I want you to stay with us, okay? Please?"
Daniel sighed and rolled over away from me, looking defeated. "I just have to wait, I guess."
"Wait for what?"
He turned his head back to face me. "For you to kill me."
I finally chuckled, convinced he was having me on. "And why should I murder you and face a firing squad, Captain?"
"Your life is hardly significant, Rebecca, in the grand scheme of things here. You have no idea what is happening, do you?"
I folded my arms. "I think I'm dealing with someone with a major case of PTSD, and isn't quite himself."
Daniel laughed and it was like a heavenly growl. "Take a look around you, Rebecca. The empty post-op except for me. I'm sure you've noticed by now the gunfire has stopped completely, and you no longer hear a thing other than birds in the sky. A little hard to believe, don't you think?"
"Probably a cease-fire, that's all. Who knows? Maybe they declared peace for all we know."
Daniel smiled softly. "Oh, it's a cease-fire, yes. The war has essentially stopped."
"And you know this how?"
He looked at me for some time, and then rolled back over to take my paw. "I'm War."
A strange feeling came over me, but I shook my head in confusion. "What do you mean, you're War?"
Daniel sighed and lay on his back. "Well, not the actual War. Just one of his angels, a Makhai."
"Who's angels?"
"Ares. You know, the god of War? I'm sure you must have heard of him."
I chuckled. "I have. And, um, what makes you think you're a Makhai?"
He replied smoothly, "Oh, I don't think I am, Rebecca. I know I am."
"Uh huh. And my causing your death is supposed to do...what exactly?"
Daniel sighed deeply again. "You're not ready yet." He closed his eyes. "I'd like to get some rest if you don't mind, nurse."
I was ruffled. "Well, look, I'm sorry. If you like, I could arrange for a psychiatrist to come in and-"
He laughed and again it was like music. "Goodbye for now, Rebecca."
I got up, prepared to storm angrily out, but a part of me was still madly in love. I leaned down and kissed his head. "Just rest, alright? Maybe soon you'll have some companions to join you here."
But we didn't. Not a single casualty came into the camp that day, or the next day, or the day after that. Regimental HQ was abuzz about the craziest reports coming in. I didn't want to believe what they were saying, and I suddenly had this wild notion about the very beginning of a forgotten chess game, where the black and white pieces stand ready for battle - but don't move at all.
That's exactly what was going on, you see. Both allies and enemies on either side of the conflict across the entire region were simply standing around doing nothing. Soldiers primed and ready for assaults were now huddled close together talking to one another, playing games on their digiphones, relaxing in shades, and every so often taking food and water to replenish themselves. Field generals from every sector, once engaged in heavy conflict, were now wandering the fields aimlessly. Sentry-tanks, jeeps, armored air-cars, and Hyperions of every size now just sat idle, spewing choking fumes and burning oil. Semi-autos, rifles, every weapon you can think of for combat, were thrown away or discarded like used toys.
No one was fighting anyone.
At the MASH, things were no different. Army personnel, doctors, nurses, and surgical teams alike all spent the days wandering the camp, relaxing, soaking in sunshine, sometimes visiting one another for carnal pleasures, and eating. We could have been at a peaceful church summer camp, with not a care in the world. I asked Tom once if he'd heard anything from Regimental lately, and he had no idea what the hell I was talking about. I'd see Steven sometimes and inquire about Daniel, and he too looked blankly at me, glassy-eyed.
There was no talk of casualties or battles.
It was like, for them, the war was...over.
Every so often I'd look in on Daniel and check his condition because I seemed to be the only one in the unit who remembered him, or cared about him.
"Amazing how you're the only one checking in on me, isn't it?" He smirked as I checked his pulse one afternoon. "I haven't seen a doctor since the day after I arrived here."
Another cold chill went through me and I shook it off. "Probably just too busy or preoccupied." I hurriedly added, "At least I still care, right?"
He looked at me warmly and I could have kissed him. "Dear, sweet Rebecca. You really have no idea what you're doing, do you?" He ran a paw down his chest and I noticed some of the bandages were seeping red. "Look. I'm still bleeding..."
I grew alarmed and reached for my digi-phone.
"Don't bother. There's probably no signal. And no one would come anyway."
I ignored him and waited on the digi-phone for Steven or one of the other doctors to pick up from the surgical unit. When no one did, I angrily hung up and dashed off to the supply closet for fresh bandages. I ran past Tom, who was looking glassy-eyed at one of the signs we have around camp for safety measures, and yelled at him to find Steven.
"I'm sorry, ma'am...do I know you?"
I was thunderstruck. "It's me! Becky! Lt. Childs!"
No recognition whatsoever.
I gave up and raced back to Daniel, removed the bloody bandages, and gasped when I saw underneath. "Wh-what happened?" He was still bleeding from several open wounds on his chest. He looked as bad as he had coming in - as if no one had operated on him at all.
"I'm not healing, Rebecca. And I'm not going to. I'm just going to lie on this cot and bleed. Don't you get it yet? I have to die."
"No, you do not! Stop saying that!" I tearfully applied fresh bandages and did what I could for the bleeding. You know I had a few years of surgical training, so I managed to stitch up some of the wounds that weren't near his heart. But he still needed more skills than I had.
"Rebecca, I can make all this go away if you just kill me. You have to. I searched your soul."
I shook my head and got up, wiping my eyes. "You just...get better, Daniel, please. Stop scaring me. Stop doing this...Just stop it!" I cried out and ran from the post-op cube.
**
A week went by before I knew it. I spent most of the time curled up in my private cube, reading books, and every so often checking in on Daniel. I had to change his bandages and re-stitch him now and then, but the bleeding was coming quicker now. I worried he'd bleed to death if I wasn't doing hourly checks.
I gave up trying to talk to anyone. Everyone was in their own world, mostly wandering around the camp aimlessly, like living zombies. The mess-cube stank of old, unused food and I had to resort to ration bars and water from the well. I tried in vain to contact anyone from Regimental, but the phones were dead.
Everything was just...dead.
One morning I thumbed through my small shelf of books and realized something else that I hadn't noticed until now. A few were missing. I'm very careful about not lending out books unless they're given back to me, but I could swear I was missing some. I did a quick check.
The Edge of the Light, The Grey Badge, Over the Red Hill, Revolutions, and one of my all-time favorites, The Battle for Saint Simone.
They were all books about war.
Something clicked in my head, like a puzzle piece I had been looking for, and I thought again about the lone chessboard, the black and white pieces waiting patiently on either side, stoic...not moving.
I slipped on a pair of khaki shorts and halter-top then went over to see my patient. Blood had soaked through his bandages again and it pooled under his cot in rivulets. I sat down next to him, trying not to look at the blood.
"No more wounded yet, I see," he replied quietly. His voice didn't seem weak at all.
"I know." I looked at him. "Your doing?"
He chuckled. "Actually, it's yours. The longer you hold off, the worse it's going to get, you know."
I smiled brightly. "Well, if keeping you alive ends this war for good, I can think of about two-hundred people in this camp that would love to know that."
"They're never going to know it. They're going to just wander around your camp until they all die."
I gasped. "What do you mean? I-"
I knew exactly what he meant.
Daniel frowned and took my paw. "Rebecca. The war hasn't ended. It's just in limbo. You've simply stopped it from existing. Dammit, what do I have to do to convince you? You're going to destroy so many lives, more lives than every war we've ever fought! Don't you get it?! I know you believe me. Why else would you be the only one in this camp that cares about me? It's you, Rebecca. You're the gateway. It's just like the time your Uncle Carl came and sat on your bed when you were a little girl."
"How did you..." I swallowed hard. "Th-that was my uncle?"
"You're damned right it was. Carl knew you of all the people in your house would appreciate his visit, so he saw you right after he died. Before-"
"Before we...got the phone call from the hospice..." My stomach lurched helplessly. "I...I knew it...somehow, it was him telling me goodbye, and not to worry..." I wiped at my eyes.
"Now do you believe me, Rebecca? Do you understand what is happening?"
"But I'm stopping the war!" I wailed and put my head in my paws. "I'm keeping people from getting hurt or killed. There's no death, no guns, no jets. It's peace, dammit!"
Daniel placed a surprisingly strong paw on my shoulder. "Rebecca, right now there are several million foxes, wolves, felines, canines out there, standing around doing nothing. They don't know they're in a war anymore. Right now, they're probably relying on their wits just to survive, eating nuts and berries, and whatever lesser creature they can get their paws on, because no food is coming to them. No rations, no water. How soon before their food supply runs out? Those fighters won't be standing around doing nothing anymore. They'll be starving to death."
"How?" I asked, still crying.
"Because there is no will to fight, and none of the soldiers will know what else to do. My being here not only takes away war, but the aspects of it, Rebecca. Basic training is lost on them. Any field work they put in is gone in their memories. Research, practice missions, everything. Those men are essentially just lost children in the fields, with no idea where they are or why. To them, they're supposed to be there to do absolutely nothing." He looked hard at her. "An angel of war must die to be reborn. That's how it goes. With my death, I'll return again, perhaps in my same form, or another, and take my place on the field again to return the battle back to normal. I am the bridge between the god and the mortals. That's how it's been for eons, Rebecca. I just somehow came to the wrong MASH unit. I was supposed to die on the way here, but..."
He smiled softly. "I guess I had to meet you first. Sometimes the god is kind and rewards us for our endless sacrifices. You're one of his too, caring for his warriors."
He leaned over to nuzzle my ear and his touch was light as a feather's. "And that's why I need you to get me to the bridge, Rebecca. You know in your heart, this is meant to be. Why else would I stay wounded, as much as you try to save me? Why else is everyone in your camp completely oblivious to you or the situation they face? My being here doesn't just stop the war. Right now, there is no such thing as war. There is no winner, there is no conclusion. There is no fighting. But there is death. If you don't help me, there is going to be a lot of that..."
I brought my head up and our noses touched. I melted. "You...really have to leave?" I whispered, rubbing noses, and tears ran down my face.
"Not yet..." He raised a paw and something glittering and shining came out from it, so bright it nearly blinded me. When the light faded, we were no longer in the post-op cube.
**
We were surrounded by bright green trees and beautiful flowers, in a secluded unnamed meadow, and we were both naked, on a luxurious bed, and warm sunlight beat down on our fur. We made love in that meadow, sweet, ardent, passionate love, and when we came together, we hugged tightly. When we finished, we lay side by side on the bed, snuggling and caressing one another, and I closed my eyes and cried when he kissed me and told me it was time.
I reached for a pillow.
**
I snapped awake to see Daniel dead next to me on his cot, and I was holding a pillow tight enough to rip it in two. There was a moment where I thought I felt a cool wind come right through me. Then my eyes adjusted once more to the overhead light of the post-op cube. I gently placed the pillow on the bed next to me, and rang for a doctor, who this time answered in seconds.
**
I'm ending this letter now, Dad, as I just heard some more casualties are coming in the next few hours, so maybe we just had a small lull for re-loading and positioning, as Steven once mentioned.
Please don't hate me for what I did. I know in my heart you believe every word I'm telling you. You always said I was special, that I was a gateway of some sort, that I could see things that weren't visible to others, that I knew things that would seem impossible to the ordinary folks around me. Unlike the spirits passing through me on their way beyond, I felt Daniel's death lift me up and embrace me. I felt a calm, and with it a secret sense of anticipation. I always wondered if I belonged to the god as well and now I'm absolutely certain of it.
Every so often a spirit will come through me, and we'll have a chat before he or she heads off to the bridge. I'm getting used to it, now that I know what my true gifts are.
Daniel's death report was eventually labeled "killed in action: severe chest wounds".
There was no mention of suffocation whatsoever.
There's a new officer, a handsome tiger I've been talking to lately here at the camp that I really like named Brandon. He looks so much like Daniel, it's scary. Same long, dark scraggly hair, blue eyes, exquisite face and features, and built like bricks.
We sneak away for quiet meals now and then, and talk about ghosts, and gods, and monsters, and sip our coffees, and play a few games of chess, and pray the war ends soon.
He seems to think it will, and so do I.
My love to Mom, and please try to visit Uncle Carl's grave when you get the time.
He says he really misses us.
Love, Becky
END