"I Am Broken"
#3 of Poetry, both old and new
Something I wrote during my worst of times, not long after the death of my beloved mate, many years ago...
"I Am Broken"
By Ken Anderson, 2 November, 2013...
I am broken;
A broken man.
Something important
Has died inside.
I swore to myself,
That I would never again
Lose control of my senses,
But now, here I am...
I drank so much liquor,
I poisoned myself.
And now, every day,
I awaken to hell.
And one week later,
I thought I'd recovered,
But then came the pills,
And calls from my mother.
There's twenty-four hours,
In each of these days,
But for those lost moments,
I lived in a haze.
Too scared to seek sleep,
For the nightmares would come,
I wished to high hell
That I still owned a gun.
I opened my eyes
And a full day had passed.
The last I remember,
I'd fell to the grass.
The cop took some pity,
And instead of jail,
He took me to detox,
It didn't end well.
The sixty-four xanax
I swallowed that night,
Still give me the shakes
And I wake up in fright.
It may not have killed me,
But it might as well,
For someone so "blessed"
I feel broken as hell.
It's been two more days,
And I can't help but think
What may have happened
If I'd stepped to the brink...
No cliff is too high,
No bayou too small,
Even now, I imagine,
Of ending it all. My friends have all left me, There's scars on my hands. It serves to remind me,
. I am a broken man...