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Procrastination was any college student's most toxic friend. They'd come by unannounced at the worst times, mosey on into your apartment, and convince you to drop everything to do something 'fun'. And, given how bored Jewel was with her latest paper, she could use some fun.

The badger flipped through the streaming services she'd gotten hooked up to the TV. Snuggling next to her Vash body pillow, she considered rewatching the classic series. She also had the latest Isekai garbage on her list. Alex had made her promise to wait until the wolf was home from work. She agreed because it was both the right thing to do for her girlfriend, and, in theory, that gave her plenty of time to get work done before she got home.

Theories rarely held up. She groaned and slumped against the couch while bemoaning the latest paper topic she'd been trying to avoid. Power dynamics. A subject she should be more than well aware of given her girlfriend's previous toxic relationship, and her best friend's weird...dynamic. Yet the more she thought about it, the more the badger wanted to avoid it. The question as to why led to more frustration. Her professor had even given her an extension for the first three weeks of summer, putting her final grade for that class in limbo.

A knock at the door pulled Jewel from her thoughts. Not expecting company, she turned the TV off and headed to the front hall of the single-bedroom apartment. Through the peephole, the badger found a butchy pig woman standing in the doorway, head looking away with an anxious grimace across her face, hands deep in the pockets of her leather jacket.

Helga, the woman her best friend was dating. Was it even dating at this point? Amy had all but moved into the older pig's house. Sure, Jewel lived with Alex, but Alex simply had nowhere else to go and it took them a few months to start sharing the same bed. Her best friend practically jumped at the chance since...Jewel bit her lip and sighed. "It's in the past," She told herself. With the door opened, the wide badger said her hellos and asked. "Where's Amy?"

"Pardon?" The pig woman asked.

"Amy? My friend?" Jewel repeated, sticking her head out the door to find no such punky vole in sight. "Did she send you for something? I think I have some old DVDs she let me borrow in highschool."

"You kids still use DVDs?"

Jewel narrowed her gaze. "I'm in my twenties."

Helga smiled, "As far as I can tell, you're still a kid until you're 36. But that's also bullshit." The pig puffed out her chest with a deep breath, giving Jewel a peak at her white T-shirt underneath the jacket. She still checked every box Jewel had for a butch lesbian, save for how long her hair was. Broad, blunt, wearing boots for hard labor and mens jeans. The kind of woman who, if in a horror movie, would put up the most physical resistance against the slasher before being ultimately killed because she didn't meet final girl standards. Granted, Helga was too old to be a slasher girl victim in a horror movie.

Then again, the Halloween reboot with Jamie Lee Curtis was a thing.

"Not really." The badger shook her head, "It's more like a collector's thing. Nowadays people just stream everything."

"Yeah, yeah..." Helga nodded, "Rebecca's been trying to convince me to get Shudder. Apparently it's a streaming service for horror movies only. Seems way too specific if you ask me." From the way she talked, it sounded like Helga had other reasons to avoid getting that service. "You busy, Rainbow?"

"I have a name." The badger fondled her multicolored headfur at the nickname and stepped aside.

"Yeah, but why else dye your hair like that if you don't want the attention?" Helga took her boots off inside the apartment, "Amy just goes green cause she likes the color. She takes at least an hour in the bathroom to reapply it. Can't imagine how annoying it's gotta be to set yours up."

Jewel decided to be polite by ignoring that question. "Can I get you anything?" She asked, "We've got some sodas imported from Japan. Banana, Teriyaki."

"Teriyaki?" Helga wore her disgust plain as day, "Who the fuck drinks teriyaki flavored soda?"

"Alex likes it."

"Well that answers that." The pig shrugged, "I'm fine with water, if that's alright." It was for the better, Ramune was an expense the badger didn't like sharing. Back in the kitchen, Jewel suddenly felt self-conscious of all the plates and bowls stacked up in the sink. The pig said nothing. Her focus was aimed towards the living room covered in tacky anime blankets, discarded pillows, and cups strewn about. "I know it isn't a happy memory, but didn't Alex used to be a butler?"

"Yeah. Ice?" Jewel pulled two cubes from the ice tray when Helga nodded. "She's teaching me to be better, though her idea of teaching me is to let me make a mess then we clean it together."

"And how's that working?" Helga asked.

Jewel motioned to the room as she handed the glass over, "Not well. Alex prefers to lay down when she gets home. Retail eats away at her. We've been delegating weekends to big cleaning days." She caught something curious in the pig's face when Helga took her glass; Bags underneath her eyes. "Having trouble sleeping?"

"Huh?" Helga paused mid sip.

Jewel pointed to her own eyes, "Your bags."

"Oh, fuck, they're that bad?" The pig asked. Jewel nodded. Helga slumped against a counter, defeated, "Fuck me..." she muttered, scratching her black hair. She had to have known how messy it was. All the visible knots and tangles, signs of constant turning against a pillow. "No, no I haven't been sleeping much. Been up late a..." The pig counted off her fingers in silence, then waved it away, "A lot. Been up a lot."

"You and Amy fighting?" She asked without thinking. If they were, why would Helga come to her over one of the pig's friends? It made more sense for the vole to be at her door, unless the pig expected she knew how best to solve any slight against Amy. "Is it something to do with Rebecca?" She added.

"No, and kinda if you count them both at once. Mind if I take a seat?" Jewel allowed it, leaving Helga to take her spot next to the Trigun body pillow of Vash. "There's been no fight, just ideas that both my ladies want me to try and, damn it all, I want to as well. Amy says you got a cabin in the upper peninsula?"

"It's my mom's, but yeah. Up by Lake Talgo." Not that anyone could find it on a map. The upper peninsula of Michigan had so many lakes that she was sure cartographers gave up out of frustration. "Why do you ask?"

Helga took a deep breath and exhaled, drumming her fingers against the couch armchair. Her leather jacket softly strained as she turned her head left and right. "Christ...it's...ok, so you know what me, Amy, and Rebecca do right? Our dynamic?" Jewel nodded. She damn well better after writing a paper on the subject. "Well, they wanna try something more hardcore. Like...see, Amy got this idea from a porno. And you know pornos aren't realis

tic. Hell, most of the ties they do can't actually be held for very long without hurting the poor model the wrong way. But this one thing she showed me brought up some old feelings and-"

Jewel held her hands up, "So it's a sex thing? You wanna borrow my mom's cabin for a sex thing?"

Helga caught her tongue. She slumped into the couch and clasped her hands, "Well, that wasn't what I was gonna say, but it's not inaccurate. Can I try to explain myself before you say no? I'll avoid the gross details." Jewel took a seat by the counter and let the pig regain her composure.

"When I was...around you and Amy's age, I had a fantasy. It was back when I was rediscovering myself after a bad breakup. In that relationship, I had no power, no real control, and the fantasy reflected a...well, a defensive reaction to that. It's kind of like a harem, but I'd have these girls not only as playmates, but doing labor for me. I was basically a slave driver." She held her hands open in defense, "Now, I know that's fucked up. But it's a fantasy, and the thought police aren't a thing so I'm not guilty for having it. Even still, I felt guilty about it overtime. I've had a few playmates I've tried it on, mostly flings, but eventually I just kind of let the fantasy die down."

She looked to her hands between her legs, a single thumb running against the thick calloused palm. "Overtime, I realized how much responsibility is required in being a top. I'm not one to shirk responsibility, not when my sisters were riding beside me. But..." she sighed, "Youth has so many dumb ideas. You can imagine how I felt when my girls shared a similar fantasy with me." The badger shrugged, not being able to relate. Helga sunk further into her couch, "Well...it was worrying."

"Why?" Jewel asked, "Seems like you all want to try it."

"Yeah, and that's what's worrying." Helga clenched her fist for a moment, tensing it as if to strangle the frustration in manifest. "I never got to experience that fantasy when I was younger. Part of me thought that was a good thing. But now...now I have an opportunity to, and the knowledge needed to keep it safe. I've been up late doing extra research and ordering things. Cameras, stands, things to record the memory. I used to record my, uh, exploits a lot. I haven't with Amy and Rebecca because they're still with me the next morning. I care about them a lot, so I want this to be a fun but safe experience for them."

All of this still didn't answer the issue at hand. "So why do you need my family cabin?"

"Privacy." Helga's tired eyes narrowed at the badger. "My neighbors are too nosey for their own good when we fu...play in my living room or kitchen." Jewel made a mental note not to eat over at their house again. "And the things the three of us want to try, well, they require going outside. Feeling the open air to help push the fantasy. Look, if you don't want us to use the cabin, that's fine. I just figured I'd ask since you're the best-"

"Sure."

"Op-what?" Helga blinked. Her surprise clear as day. "Come again?"

"I can convince my mom to pass me the keys. Say it's a celebration for a semester's end or something." Her mother wasn't going to be an issue. She practically threw the keys at Jewel every weekend. "Honestly, it probably needs some cleaning. We haven't been there in years. But I do have one demand."

Helga hunched over, listening with intent. "I want to come along." Again, the confusion on Helga's face was palpable. Jewel raised her hand as she explained, "I know you are a good top or whatever, at least when comparing Amy's experience with Alex's. But if this is as 'hardcore' as you say it is, I think you need an outside observer for safety. And, frankly, you look like you're ready to collapse. I've done enough research into your lifestyle to know that you should be keeping better care of yourself if you're gonna play with others."

Warily, Helga said, "So...You want to come by and be a babysitter?" Jewel preferred her version but agreed all the same. "Ok, ok, yeah." Helga got up, "What about Alex? Given her...history, there's no way she's wanna come with us. And, no offense to your relationship, she seems pretty latched onto you."

"I'll talk with her." The badger played out the conversation in her head, making notes to avoid any specifics that could lead to a trigger. Given the subject matter, it was going to be difficult. "And we should have cell service down there or at least something to help set it up, so I can keep in contact with her. It'll only be for a few days, right?"

Helga held up four fingers, "Four at most. We'll drive up and set stuff up, have two days of play, then take stuff down and head home."

"That's good." Jewel nodded, "It won't bother you, will it? Having someone else there, watching?"

With clasped fingers, Helga tightened her shoulders and exhaled. "No. It's a bit of a relief actually." She spoke without weight, without worry. "You gonna be fine with it? Didn't you used to have a crush on Amy? Or did I read your previous relationship wrong?"

"It's in the past," Jewel stated, "And besides, I could use this as research for something. If you're ok with that."

"So long as you don't mention identifying features I don't care." The pig got up and reached for a handshake, "Thanks again, this, well, this means a lot. Christ...that sounds selfish of me."

"No, I get it." Jewel took the older woman's hand, letting strong and calloused fingers wrap around her own. The same fingers that enthralled her best friend. "I'm well past judging you. Besides, I owe you one for helping Alex."

"You or Alex owe me nothing. I was just helping a girl out of a bad situation." Helga smiled and took off, "Oh, before I go, can you give me the address? I wanna check the place out before we actually go there."

"I'll text it to you. When are we doing this?"

"Soon. Like, maybe next week." Jewel did the math. It'd be close, but she could work her paper with that in mind. "Let's be ready for that."

***

It was actually going to happen. Helga had drowned out the realization on the drive home, needing full concentration for her bike. But when she parked on her driveway and headed inside, the fact hit her like a brick wall. And, like a tidal wave, it nearly drowned her.

Amethyst sat in the kitchen, going over her prepwork for whatever college class she had next year. She smiled up at Helga. "How'd it go with Jewel?"

"Good." Helga sat next to her, feeling the full weight of her body against the chair, "She agreed, on the condition she comes with."

"Huh?" Amethyst raised her brow, "Why? This isn't really her thing, and given what her girlfriend went through."

"She's worried about me." She noticed it well before the badger had said it, "I probably look like a wreck to her right now." Lack of sleep and constant dread from overplanning would do that. Her vole said nothing. She simply put her pen down and wrapped her arms around the older woman. As soon as Helga felt her pull, she sat solid and chuckled, but gave in and felt her head brace her girlfriend's chest.

"It's going to be ok." Amethyst brushed through her bedraggled hair, "Rebecca and I both trust you."

"I know..." Helga said, sinking into the vole's bust, "I know. It's just...I'm scared."

"Oh hurting us?"

"Of scaring you." Her voice grew airy and cracked. "I've played the fantasy in my head so many times, and it's been fine as a fantasy. No one real gets hurt, nobody I care about needs aftercare." It was a darker fantasy, one she was happy to leave in the basement of her mind. "I'm just...so scared that if I go into it, it'll hurt our relationship."

There was a pause. Amethyst's hand stayed still against Helga's scalp, only scratching her forefinger across it. "When we first met, at that munch, I was scared of you." Amethyst said, "Attracted, but a bit scared. It was like you were this badass bitch who wouldn't hold back if someone begged you to. But deep down, you're such a softy, even when you're forcing me on my knees to kiss your boots."

"Amy, I'm having a panic attack here, can we not make this about kink?" Not that Helga was pulling herself away anytime soon.

"Just let me finish. You're a scary person. You've beaten up guys who hurt me, put Rebecca's abusive father into the hospital, and slapped that ice-cold bitch who gaslit Alex without hesitation. You've also held me close when I broke down after Jewel and I fought, and you've been helping Rebecca study so she can get into college. The scariest parts of you come from protecting others because you care so much. So, I'm not afraid of you when we play, no matter how hard you go. Cause I know that the moment I say pineapple, you will drop everything and even take a knife to my bindings if needed."

"I hope not," Helga chimed in, "Leather's expensive and you know I hate rope."

The vole chuckled, "But I like it, and you're willing to practice it." They sat in silence. For how long, the pig couldn't say. She guessed at least an hour when Amethyst gently let her go and packed her bag for work. "Promise me you'll get some sleep before picking up Rebecca from the shop, ok? Can't have you falling asleep behind the wheel."

Helga promised and gave her girlfriend a kiss goodbye. To this day, the vole half her age surprised her with the wisdom she carried. Maybe it had something to do with her generation, not that the pig paid much attention to that. Setting her phone for twenty minutes, Helga headed to the bedroom and collapsed against the bed.

The void welcomed her.