FSE

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Samuel's claws ran up her arm, tenderly traced the grey surface, and tickled the skin underneath. At first, her figure remained completely inert, merely rising and falling from her breaths into the pillows, but finally his efforts bore fruit. The wolfess blinked a few times, yawned widely, then passed him the tired glance he had hoped for, yet simply refused to give in otherwise. Moving up to the shoulder, he didn't get a reaction either, but once the tips barely touched her neck, a delightful twitch shook her figure. "Morning, sunshine," he laughed when Sarah rammed her elbow into the terrier. "You prick," came her muffled response and she had pulled the blanket back up if he would have let her. For Sam hadn't leant his lesson, he had an entirely different idea and continued to tease her until she had enough. Turning over in a snarl, strong paws fixed the giggling dog's arms on the mattress and although he fought, he had no intention to win, had he achieved what he sought anyway. "I told you to never do this again," she on the other hand frowned and bared her teeth threateningly, couldn't help against the cute look he passed down her form though. "As long as you're this beautiful, I'm afraid I have no choice," he responded before resting a worried gaze on the small marks on her throat. The fur still hadn't grown back sufficiently to cover the strangely discoloured skin underneath and cut deep into her self-esteem. In turn, Sarah kept sitting on him on all fours only a moment longer, then dropped back on her place to avoid his stare. "Hey, it's alright," Sam just hummed softly before moving in and kneading her back as far as the shirt allowed for, "You can stay in bed as long as you remember your appointment at the court." A short kiss was planted on Sarah's neck before Sam covered her in a blanket again and rose from the sheets. Heading for the shutters, he locked out the first rays of sunlight and set the alarm clock with a few taps to 11 am, then leaned down and gave her another, more passionate kiss on the cheek. "I'll be there. You... you don't have to do this on your own. Remember: 1 pm." She nodded sorrowly and sunk even deeper into into the pillows while the terrier carefully left and closed the door again.

On his advice, Sarah had moved into his flat two months ago until the legal case around Miles would be resolved. Since the incident half a year ago, she had been mostly fine, at least from what she conveyed to the outside, they had spent a wonderful time, but justice sadly was a long way to go. The monster had survived and now he pleaded for self defence, even claimed to be the victim. According to his version, he had been invited by Sarah, running directly into some sort of imaginary trap. As outrageous as these accusations might be, Samuel's involvement with her and the injuries on both sides didn't provide clear evidence on its own either, stretching the process out significantly. Their lawyers certainly were confident to win the case, having every bit of reliable information on their side, but it was straining for her to go through the pain time and time again nonetheless. The Finnish spitz mix' mere presence was enough to stress her out; heck, she recently had had panic attacks just from the thought of sleeping on her own, her flat no longer a save place despite the security measurements. He sighed deeply, got dressed and prepared a small breakfast for himself, yet couldn't keep his thoughts from wandering back to her as there was plenty to fear for after all. Soon he was done, the remaining scrambled eggs remained under a serving dome in the kitchen and off he was for work. Hours passed, blueprints and parts swooshed by, yet the closer the hearing ticked, the more restless he grew. The official citation summoned him there either way and thus he was allowed to leave early, but in their current state of affairs, he was barely granted enough time off to get to the court, but not nearly enough to pick Sarah up. The allotted time finally arrived and Sam changed his steel-capped boots and sturdy clothes for a decent looking suit, which his colleagues commented with the same wit and ridicule their division usually treated the higher ones behind their backs. They were probably just envious seeing him leave early, on the other hand did he feel as antic as they considered him now and it was a fascinating experience to once be on the receiving end of their jokes. Half an hour later, he sat there in the back room, ready to be called in and make his statement, unsure nonetheless whether she was on the other side of this bloody door. Also failing to find a claw left to safely gnaw on, he was limited to scribble formulas and plans on the only piece of paper present: sticky notes. By the time the bailiff showed up, they already found the whole table covered in yellow notes portraying one of Samuel's prototype and almost every calculation there was to make, even some progress he was more than eager to hand over to his colleagues. The spotted rabbit just passed him an annoyed frown and called him over while trying very hard to stay professional.

Sarah's fur was a mess, she looked like she had just left the bed just like her suit and despite being physically present, her mind was very likely to wander through the hardly more pleasant realm of her thoughts. With the necessary amount of worries, Sam eventually stepped up to the lectern, cleared his throat and during the following interrogation, he dutifully went over every detail, pleasant and upsetting, the Finnish spitz mix' gaze always resting upon him with this knowing grin. This... thing did not even seem to care about the white, bare line which spanned half his muzzle where the iron poker had crushed skin and skull underneath. He knew exactly what this did to Sarah, relished it even and so he wouldn't confess and neither would the litigation stop. Five long hours later, the judge eventually decided to readjourn, three hundred minutes in which the she-wolf was forced to listen while her trauma was ripped to pieces, looked into by total strangers, even the very existence of one questioned multiple times. The next appointed date was set in a week and they were all sent home with the only relief being their opponent remanded into custody. Samuel would also have picked up his notes from earlier, but some bustling person had already removed them sadly, leaving him no real distraction from the thunderstorm raging in Sarah's head and casting lightnings on everyone around her. Throughout their drive home, the terrier tried to talk to her, attempted to explain himself and apologise for the statements from earlier, but she merely shook her head and dug herself even deeper in. The car stopped, the engine stuttered to a halt and the moment the hand brake engaged, she already was half up from her seat and on her way upstairs. Nonetheless the terrier took his time, stepped through the open front door and when he slowly entered the bedroom, he could already hear her whimper in the darkness. Tiredly taking his place by her side, he embraced the shivering figure in the flimsy hope of easing some of this pain, humming softly like he usually did when she had trouble falling asleep. "I don't want to return there, Sam. N-not in a week, not in a month, never again," she muttered and pressed back into him, half to catch the warmth, half to make sure he was there and not another of her imaginations. "You sadly have to; you're legally obligated and even if you weren't: do you want to get this monster away with it?" he whispered and carefully nibbled on her ear, "Just one, maybe two-" "And then two more, and another one, it's always the same," the wolfess snarled and struggled against the embrace, "Just make it stop, once and for all." The dog simply pulled her in even tighter, patiently waiting for her movements to cease, then placed a kiss on her neck, "I'm working on it. I'll stand it through with you, every single hearing, I promise." "You promise?" "I promise." Void once again claimed the room and for the next hour the two, their shared heartbeat was the only thing to hear, until eventually Sarah crawled out of his arms and headed for the windows. "Let's get ourselves something for supper," she just said light-heatedly and pulled up the shutter rapidly enough to blind the terrier with the beautiful day's light. After a moment of blinking groggily, he grunted his agreement and turned over, only to find her happy as ever again. Her tears had dried, the eye's outline still red and puffy, but her smile was unshaken nonetheless. This was the mask she wore every day, too afraid of what was underneath. Some part of him just wanted to believe her, longed for her well-being, but it would take its time and until then, they had to run with what was available.

Tomorrow came and with it just another day of work. Sam left a doughnut on the kitchen counter and when he returned from work later that day, he found Sarah sitting on the floor with a box on her lap. Just the opening door made her look snap up at him and in her palms he spotted a shimmering piece of garment she immediately stuffed back into its containment. "Can't leave your paws out of other people's stuff, can you?" he smirked as she hastily pushed the box away like a pup caught on the cookie jar. "I didn't know you wear outdated dance outfits. I have to admit though... now that I imagine it..." she noted with a critical look and approached him slowly before her fingers tenderly traced his form, "all of this squeezed into this expensive thing of a cage you call clothing. Would be a pleasant mix-up for once." A firm grip around his behind pulled the surprised terrier in for a kiss, suddenly broken by her grin when she felt his growing excitement between them, "You seem to enjoy the thought, don't you?" "It's more the idea of you having to take it off beforehand," he said while his claws started playing with the hem of her jeans, "I mean... the surprise part is gone now, but we can still get you out of here, have a wonderful evening, dance through the night, try something new and afterwards... well, there's room for everything you want." "You really want to wrap me into this sparkling prison," she hummed softly when searching fingers moved deeper down her bare rump. "Oh, don't you worry. I bought myself a matching one, but no, I would have no objection if you left the whole deal about clothing be altogether." On that note, the wolfess pushed him back a little and passed Sam a surprised look. "I told you to show some initiative, but now you're starting to worry me," she laughed while her caddish tail betrayed her feelings more than obviously. "Too much?" "No, just... unusual." She moved closer again, but reluctantly pulled his paws out of her trousers, "and I don't feel like all of this outside-business at the moment to be fair. I'd love to wear it for you, just not... any time soon. Thank you though." "You don't have to do anything 'for me'. If you don't like the idea, I can send it all back. I... just thought a small distraction might be a good idea," he smiled soothingly and moved his embrace to a more appropriate height. A moment passed before she wrinkled her nose and stepped away a little again, "It's perfect. But you're definitely overdue for a shower." As proof, she ran a finger behind his ear and it returned with a black oily droplet on it she immediately smeared straight over his formerly clean forehead. The CNC-machine had been leaking out of one of the coolant pipes and everything had gone south from there, ending in almost a full replacement of the head and its mechanics. A last toothy grin passed over his muzzle before he made a mock bow and obediently entered the bathroom.

The geyser sizzled a little when he turned on the water soon after. He would definitely have to deal with this topic at some point as the pitch ringing in his ears made it uncomfortable to merely stay for too long. The input likely was a little too low at the moment. Sam took a bar of soap and started lathering his arms up while water ran into his ears and fortunately muffled the device's suffer. It probably had a small leak, too, so air could get in and combined with the reduced intake, water was able to punctually boil and... two gentle paws ran down his back, tickled every mark Miles had left with extreme care before the bare rest of the body pressed itself against his back. "Hi there," Sarah purred and wrapped her arms around his chest, "would you mind sharing a little?" "I shouldn't have showed you how to open this lock," Sam just complained reproachfully yet understanding, "it's just an emergency system in case of... well, an emergency." "How do you know it's not? Maybe you felt particularly lonely in there," she murmured while her fingers traced further towards his arms, "In which case I would have to come in and do my very best to aid you, don't I?" "Are you sure that it's not the other way around?" Sam reached behind himself to tickle her ears while she took over the bar of soap and worked it into his chest and neck. "... Maybe," the wolfess eventually muttered. Strangely there was no desire in her touches, simply the intimate contact seeming to matter. "Relax, just let me do this for you," came her dampened voice from his shoulder without slowing down her efforts when he tried to assist her. A little unsure where she was heading, he comlied and limited himself to turning so that she could reach everything a little easier. His waist and nethers got the same treatment as everything else, before she knelt down and continued with his legs. A tickle on each calf rose his hindpaws from the ground and eventually she stood up in front of him. The way her snout traced every inch of him on the way upwards usually would have touched something inside of him, meant something, but now it was merely the physical stimulus; just the proof of her presence. Some time passed while she just lightly ran the tips of her claws over the tiny scars left from his fight. They healed over time, in another month they wouldn't be even visible anymore, but for some reason there lay a strange sense of guilt in her actions. "Turn around, Sarah," he finally ordered the drenched mess in front of him, "You look like you can use some of your own medicine." "No, please, I... you don't have to," she responded absently while clenching to the bar of soap even tighter. He even noted the pads of her fingers dig into the soft surface when she readjusted her grip. "It's nothing really. I just want you to feel alright." "But I don't want to." He paused for a second and pulled the slippery block from between her paws with a tad of effort before resting his paw on her cheek, "You don't want to feel alright or you don't want me to be the reason for it?" The she-wolf didn't move, neither did she answer. It was just her distracted, sheepish gaze that thoroughly traced his eyes. "Alright. Turn around then," he instructed once again and when she didn't react, tenderly coaxed her to do so, but felt no real resistance to push against in the first place. Although a drooling voice inside his head demanded otherwise, Sam just progressively applied the soap over her entire body and carefully rinsed the non-existent grunge. On the other hand did she barely react to any of his actions, just releasing a bit of tension when he let go with a passionate kiss on her clenching snout. He already stood under the drizzle of running water long enough for the foam to be washed off, so all that was left was to remove it from her as well. This time she actually played along somewhat and only minutes later, both lay dry and clean on the carpet, hurdled together under a blanket. Although she usually liked these moments, now her body was more the one of a puppet, stiff and inert. "Was it that terrible?" the terrier whispered softly into her neck, before she winced slightly and did her best to put up an act again. "It's just the stress. Upcoming trial and... everything," came her quiet reply, before she regained control and forced herself to relax. She slowly released her breath and eventually her body almost genuinely slumped down too and slid snugly against him. "Then let's simply forget about 'everything', shall we?" She grinned tiredly, eyes closing and almost falling asleep right in place until her dissatisfied stomach grumbled its not so silent protest. "Just another 'everything?" the terrier smirked and kissed her forehead until her tail wagged high enough to move the blanket, "alright, let's start dinner early then. Fried noodles and eggs? Bathed in a sufficient dose of ketchup?" "Are you still a 19 year old student in his first apartment?" Sarah giggled, nodded after a moment of consideration though.

The evening passed quickly and after the improvised, yet delicious nonetheless, meal, the TV was running with two very tired canines in front of it. The steaming service kept playing one episode after the other, half of which Sam missed while laying in this comfortable lap of hers. The wolfess on the other hand "just" buried her muzzle in his back and even showed signs of activity as she squealed from time to time when her favourite actor fried another row of zombies, the massive, ursine arms on full display with a flamethrower in each one. The blue heat lit up his pale fur and when he looked into the camera with these dark blue bedroom eyes, Sarah's knees shook the terrier awake. "Look at him! Oh my god, look at him!" the maniac screeched before he could cover his sensitive ears. Samuel looked at the screen for a moment, then closed his eyes again, "this guy's more muscles than anything. Ask him to solve a linear system of equations and his pea of a brain is going to melt. Even searching for his keys might be too much of a strain. All these seconds of short-term memory to look through..." A rough slap on the back killed the remainders of his sleepiness when his not-so-indifferent pillow declared their opinion, "You jealous furball. Just look at this... majestic elegance he grills those monsters with, something you'll never achieve. The sheer training that went into this performance. Hours of lifting those... heavy scripts to remember every single page with his gigantic cerebral masterpiece." "If only he could recognise the alphabet they're written in," the terrier grunted and reached behind himself for a pillow. Merely a startled scream managed to leave her lips before it ended this ill-mannered uttering. "So you think," he snarled playfully and softly increased the pressure, "that I can't keep up with some steroid injection on legs?" Sarah thought for a moment before she pushed it off her face again and patted his shoulder apologetically, "don't worry. The next time I need higher calculus, I'm going to ask you, but you have to admit, that he's something of a looker." The terrier snorted into her thigh for a moment, but had to nod his agreement eventually. Just one point remained left to clarify. "It's linear algebra by the way. It's even in the name: 'linear set of equations', but who cares, am I right?" Sarah passed him a short look at first, then moved on to ruffling his ears. "Ooooh, someone's huffy," she giggled while he did his best to stop smiling from the pleasant attention, "Come on, let's call it a day. Enough drama and flamethrowers for now." A short groan was all answer she could get as she pulled her legs back and knocked him off. With a considerable amount of further sighs, the terrier eventually rose from the sofa and planted a passionate kiss on her lips instead. She was too tired to return it properly, but on the other hand didn't he stand a real chance against the growing fatigue either. When she later cuddled against his back, her arm didn't even fully reach around his stomach as it usually did, merely a light tickle of the terrier's side.

The day after passed relatively eventless, but when Sarah left the bedroom on the next one, something had changed. Next to her usual morning treat ? Sam had left her waffles this time ? lay a letter. Curiously she unfolded the paper and it took her a moment to figure out the hastily written words dotted about, "Morning, sunshine, there had been an emergency at a customer's facility in Aruven and I've been assigned to lead the repairs, the investigations and stuff. By the time you read this, I'm already aboard a plane there. Didn't want to wake you up, but I'll call you once I arrive. It's probably going to take a week or so there, so I'm afraid I have to break my promise. I love you, but you'll be without me on this one. I'm Sorry. Enjoy the waffles. Sam." She read through it again and again, stared at the message for minutes, yet failed to gain any new information until she gave up, crumbled the letter and launched it into a corner. "Fuck you!" the desperate wolfess cried, the first tears for days raining down on the table as her heart burst ablaze in mere seconds. The sheer thought of returning alone did its best to force her stomach's minimal contents upwards while images of this monster leaving in freedom flashed before her eyes. The delicious looking plate would have been her next victim to wreck if her head hadn't grown heavy and slammed on the surface next to the food. With a weak whimper she tried to push it away to keep this disgustingly enticing smell out of her nostrils, but by the time she had dug her claws into them, it was too late. A first, drooping bite lead to the next one, killing one piece of temptation after the other until the plate was licked clean and she had vomited it all up again if it weren't a waste of the innocent ingredients. He had promised it. He had made a bloody promise and now he conveniently wasn't available for her to remind him of it. Hours went by behind the TV, half a season of a show she couldn't be bothered to remember the name of and finally the phone rang, the usual "tactical alert"-siren wailing for attention. Sarah's fingers touched the handset, but she didn't find any more strength to lift it. Her paw dropped back on the couch until the bone lazy voice mail did its job and took over the unwanted caller. The device ever so badly begged to be crushed when it replayed the message left by Sam, "Hi, Sarah... You're not answering your phone, so I guess I just hoped... I know that you're listening. Look, I'm so terribly sorry about everything. I... It wasn't my decision to make, but they simply cancelled my day off. I'll be back as soon as possible, just... Oh ffff- just promise me to show up on Thursday. I'm definitely in no position to ask you for anything, just... I'll make up for it once I've returned. If there's anything I can do, contact me under this number for I have a new one around here. Fees and so on, but I gotta hang up. Take care. I love you." A last bleep marked the end of his call, being a pesky understatement for what it meant. Just a short sob passed her lips when she tore the pillow in half. The terrier's head would have been better.

Thursday came and she actually managed to call a cab and leave the flat. During the ride, Sarah looked at herself in the rear mirror, kicked remaining particles off her suit and inspected the neatly cleaned fur of hers. Everything had to be perfect. Definitely not for Samuel, but she would never look weak in front of the beast again. When she dropped on the wooden bench and her gaze ran over the drooling watchers, she actually spotted a kindly smiling terrier in the crowd until her subconsciousness snapped back in sync with reality. Sam was nowhere to be seen, this conspecific was just as eager to see her suffer as anyone else. The other party entered, Miles passed her his usual grin, but she wouldn't be intimidated this time. In the end, the hearing took just three hours of false accusations until the judge shook the room with his hammer. Without Sam, it had just taken three hours for the judge to declare 'Mr. Kessler guilty of all charges', his defacement a mere result of his own aggressions. A strange sense of pride later warmed her cheeks as she noted the dog's angry snarl, the deadly looks he passed her when being dragged out of the room. She had done it; it was over.

Samuel leaned back in his seat. The project had been running for longer than expected as issues had continued to pop up, delaying his return multiple times, but a day ago they had finally found the last one and now his presence was no longer needed. Now he was on board an aeroplane back home and although the book he had brought was fairly interesting, his nerves kept raging on and practically wiped his short-term memory clean every few seconds until he stuffed it back into the backpack with a grunt. Thirty minutes left, twenty-one when he started gathering his hand luggage, fifteen when he had pulled it apart again. He looked for his smartphone, pulled it out at the twelve minute mark, checked his watch again. Two minutes later he was asked to turn it off again, five more and his neighbour had serious concerns that the terrier would bite into his seat and finally the plane bumped a few times, came to a halt and through the windows he could see the staircases approaching. The cab driver on his way home took his time as well and was almost hit unconscious with the pay in the end, before the terrier jumped out, tore the suitcases out of the boot and ran towards his house's entrance. A minute of rumbling up the stairs he unlocked the door and... she wasn't there. Sam took a deep breath while looking around. A pair of shoes was missing, her jacket wasn't on the hook, and his calls, both vocal and on her smartphone, remained unanswered. If he were a little more reasonable, he would have acknowledged what it meant for her to leave the flat again, but all he could think of right now was how empty the flat seemed. The stubborn she-wolf had made everything special: coming home, cooking dinner, merely living in her presence and he hadn't noticed how much he had valued the life it had brought, even the usual misery now a better option than this silence considering the past events. "Just be happy for her you moron," he eventually chuckled and dropped his suitcase on the floor to take off his jacket, "she'll show up eventually." After his belongings were stashed away, Samuel idly took out his smartphone to check the most recent messages he had missed during the flight and happily noted that Sarah apparently wasn't the only one enjoying the evening. Connor, a colleague of his, had posted a picture of his husband absently sipping on a glass of wine in a more or less generic restaurant. Though he probably wasn't even aware of the photo as from what Sam knew about him, Connor wouldn't have the physical capabilities anymore to write such a happy comment if he did. Sheepishly amused, the terrier tried to rise from his seat when his phone faded to stand-by, but had to note that the couch was simply to comfortable. Having still free time till tomorrow, he instead returned to his book in the flimsy hope of finishing the first chapter, hours later though, his consciousness returned and the evening's sun already peeked through the curtains. The fading light sadly was still enough to illuminate up the crumpled thing under his chest though and a check on his watch told him, that it was already 8 pm."At least my inner clock is more reliable than my girlfriend," he mumbled with a short grin while he headed for the kitchen to get a dinner and fought against the desire to fall asleep again. A proper meal followed and finally, while the sun inched ever further behind the horizon, a key jingled in the lock. It stopped for a moment, faltered when it required less turns than usual, then the hinges whispered their quiet song and the blade swung open. Careful steps approached and finally she came around the corner. "Hey there, sunshine," he grinned and rose from the couch, "thought you'd never see me again, didn't you?" Her lips deformed to a short smile when his arms slung around her and pressed her close. "I'm glad that you go outside again," he mumbled into her shoulder and placed a kiss on the trembling cheek, "I'm so proud of you, my love. We have won; You have won." For a moment he caught an unusual scent from her neck, yet there were more pressing matters right now. Finally she returned his affection and he felt her claws trace idle lines over his back while they danced wide, unhurried circles through the living room and the terrier felt their figures slowly melt together. For a few minutes the couple just enjoyed the non-existent music until she sank down on the floor and against the couch. Watching her hide her face in her arm, Sam suddenly noticed the growing dampened spots and when he tried to pull down her cover, Sarah even fought back a little. Giving up, they lay there for a while before she shakily raised her voice on her own, "you weren't there. We won the case, b-but... you simply weren't there. You have no idea what-" Her voice broke again, gushed away by a heartbreaking whimper that led to a fierce resistance against his presence. "And a week later, you.... y-you just show up. 'Here I am, sunshine, I was just gone for a while, but who cares, right?' I care, Sam! I ? care!" The terrier paused for a second before he cautiously replied, "I called, Sarah, you just didn't pick up. I wrote thirty messages; Per day. Even if not, why does Stan have to tell me the good news?" Sarah just hit after him again, but stayed quiet otherwise. He watched her from a metre distance, but eventually decided to leave her be. "Whatever," he grunted and headed for the bedroom, "take the couch if you prefer sulking for tonight, but don't blame me for a stiff back tomorrow." "Get lost!" she just yelled and reached for the first thing in her range. "Don't you dare," Sam snarled, but to no avail. Only when the glass missed him by a centimetre and crashed into the wall right next to him did he turn around again, shards raining down all around him. "What on earth do you want? What's the fucking point here? Do you want to go back in time, before this asshole laid his bloody paws on you? Before me? Your own flat is more than willing to welcome you back. You could start living off your own pocket again. I won't hold you back any longer if that's what you want." Despite the sting in his chest, he just spun around and continued for the bedroom again. She could wreck his interior as much as she wanted to, she would calm down tomorrow anyway. In the end, Sarah didn't follow up on it anyway and for the next hours he heard nothing from next door while his thoughts kept raging on. Strangely it was mostly about his projects, the short argument had merely set them off. When he finally was about to fall asleep however, he heard the door handle rattle, careful steps approached with her claws clicking painfully loudly on the wooden floor. He didn't even need to open his eyes to notice the shadow slipping inside, obstructing the light for a second before the switch snapped it out. The terrier in turn pulled the blanket further up when the rustle of the bedsheets next to him announced her arrival. She got the message and kept her distance, nonetheless did he hear the short movements, how she shifted her weight to reach out for him before immediately giving up again with a whimper. Listening to it for a while, he finally grunted and reluctantly raised the duvet a tad for her warm body inched against his back. Dampened arms slung around his chest and her similarly wet face left its marks in his scruff. "I-I'm sorry... Oh Sam, I didn't mean to... Come on, say something," she whispered and cuddled a bit closer,"don't make me beg, please. I know that I have butchered this, b-but I just... I just don't know-" "You're right, OK? You're right. But that's a topic for tomorrow. I gotta sleep before I can take any more drama." Sam tenderly kissed the paw in front of him and felt a short nibble on his ear, yet once he had closed his eyes again, she continued, "No, it can't wait, Sam. For the last weeks, everything was just about that trial... Everything we did... but now it's over all the sudden and now I..." The wolfess waited for a moment in silence until a deep snoring vibrated through her boyfriend. She softly called his name, but he didn't react, just the slow hiss of his breaths accompanying her solitude.

When he returned the next day, Sarah was gone once again. Not even sunset managed to summon her this time. He even was about to finish his, admittedly late, supper when he noticed a movement out on the street as an SUV rolled into the courtyard ten metres below. Most of his neighbours had no car at all and the few who had one usually stayed off the footpath. Putting down the bowl, he curiously moved closer to the window just in time to spot the driver get out and open the other side. The horned head bent down, opened the door and let their fellow out. Sam was just about to give the two a moment when something felt off about that other person. This wasn't just any she-wolf kissing the stranger in plain sight. She didn't even look up to check on him, apparently assuming him to be asleep already. With a heavy scoff, the terrier finished his meal and barely had time to stash the dish away until steps moved up to the entrance, yet when she opened it, she hesitated to proceed for a moment. Eventually she entered though, only to find him standing in the hallway. A surprised yelp escaped her muzzle when Sarah stumbled back against the door frame. "You... are awake," she stated and slowly stepped back into the hallway to close the door and continue to stare blankly at him. "As are you. Had a nice evening?" he replied and stepped closer. "Yeah... just having a drink with Stan and Ronnie," she smiled in return while the stranger's scent he had noticed yesterday already started flooding the room, "celebration and all. It had been a while and we got carried away a little." He grinned back without the slightest impulse and slung his arms around her, "great. Do you still need something to eat? I have a risotto on the cooker and ? if you don't mind me saying ? it's a shining success." "No, thank you, I already had dinner with-" she started and bit her tongue before she could finish the sentence. "I'm surprised, that Stan knows anything about edible food, you know?" Sam just chuckled and kissed her on the muzzle, the same that had betrayed him mere seconds ago, now lying without the slightest hint of remorse, "much less after you had a drink or two. People make the strangest decisions once they had their first few glasses." He took another nose of this heavy smell and noticed that it was probably a mixture of a common deodorant, expensive perfume and an unusually piney body odour. At this point she seemed to realise that something was off as her eyes widened for a moment, but apparently she assumed him dumb enough to fall for her. "So you're feeling better already?" Having found her explanation and started smiling happily, "oh gosh... that's why you're still up? I'm... fine, the first time in a long while. There's nothing to worry about." "OK, I'll pull in my horns. It's Friday, which means I'm off work tomorrow, so what do you think? Care to show me the restaurant you two went?" the terrier whispered, each remark running a short tremble down her figure she thought he didn't notice, counted it as a slip of the tongue probably. "Sounds great. Although Ronnie didn't like the portions, so we should probably settle on somewhere else," the wolfess grinned sheepishly, but retreated a little. She was clearly uncomfortable judging by the blink frequency of her eyes. "You're the expert," he nonchalantly commented and guided her to the bedroom, "bur for now we have to catch some sleep." The moment he tugged on her hem though, she squirmed out of his grip and headed for the bathroom. "I should probably take a shower for both of our sakes, you know? Long day and everything..." she mumbled rather quickly when a different cloud of scent rose from her body; sweeter, stifling almost. "Yeah, probably a good idea."

Half an hour later when he laid upon their blanket in his pyjama trousers, she slowly entered. The intense smell of her shampoo now easily covered up everything left of her recent activities, even when she sat down on her side of the bed. "So you know about... it," Sarah eventually muttered, her ears drooping sorrowly. Realisation seemed to have struck in the meantime, pretty early on probably judging by her overall attire. "Yep," the terrier plainly noted and reached his paw out for her back, "you could've told me on your own, you know? It's not like you didn't have the time." She stayed quiet for a moment while he slowly ran his fingers over the garment and felt for her slow breaths. "But_you_ don't have it, Sam," she eventually countered quietly and shook him off. "What do you mean?" "... You're gone in the morning, back god knows when and then you're tired, always absent," he heard her cry out, yet her face remained tuned away, "I'm only living here, but not with you. This is not what I wanted, it's... not enough for me." "And he is?" His question hung there for a moment, frozen in mid air, before he continued, "I know, that it's not easy, damn it, I know. What is 'enough' though? Should I quit my job, spend the day watching TV and wait for your problems to die out on their own?" "I just want you to be here, one single day. Truly, no project, no sudden trips, just us." Sam sat up and scoffed, "I was here, every day for months, doing my very best to keep everything running around here. For the last thirty days you have been an absolute wreck, but I kept going. I tried every trick from the book, gave you everything you asked for and even more you'd never requested, however once you're somewhat back in business, you immediately start whoring around. It's your body, your life, but I don't necessarily need to like it." "That's not-" she started, yet he just raised his voice a little, "And hey, I'm fine as long as you're being honest, but how long has this been running? Two weeks? A month? Ever since we met? If you don't want what I have to offer, then feel free to leave. Hand in a notice, leave a rating and move on to the next shitty product. Just tell me when I'm obsolete and get the hell out of here." When she finally turned around on that statement, tears glistened in the terrier's eyes. "This is not fair, Sam, for neither of us. I..." "You what?" "I'm sorry, OK? I'm sorry you had to find out this way... It was never meant to last, it... just happened, a fucked up decision I made under worse conditions, but... W-we can fix this, OK? Just... I love you, Sam." She reached out for his trembling arm and actually was allowed to latch onto it, yet his eyes bespoke something far worse. "How would I ever trust you from now on, Sarah? If it were different circumstances back then, why do I find you two making out in our courtyard today? When would you have told me be the way? See," he pointed at her ashamed look, "you're not even sorry lying to me, you don't regret a single night of the god knows how many you two shared. All you are sorry for is that I found out!" "You have no idea!" Sarah yelled back and jumped up, "I have lost everything I had! Just because of this! I can never safely return to my flat, I can never again look at you without seeing the bleeding lump struggling for their life. My friends treat me like a porcelain doll all the sudden and you claim your life to be hard? I have nothing but us, but all you can think of is your job." Sam stared up at her for a while before he raised his voice again, the deep growl enough to make her wince, "'all I can think of'? It's genuinely the only certainty I have right now. You're either gone, an emotional wreck, or put up this disgusting act of pretending to be alright that makes everything ten times worse. It's like Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun." Both fell silent for a while and it took him a bit to find his voice again and calm down enough to become somewhat reasonable again, "Listen, I can't blame you for what you're going through... Everything's been so messed up lately, I have no idea how to move on, so just know that it's not easy for either of us. Be honest or be gone, that's all I'm asking for." Another minute passed until Sarah slowly sat down besides him again. "Can we... try again? I don't want to lose you over this, not after all we've been through." He thought for a moment while her paws carefully rested on his lap, but finally he had to make a decision, "I'm not so sure whether we should actually. Yes, we've been through a lot together, but this also hangs gravely between us. We'd never be as happy as we hope for, you know? I think it's better to let this relationship rest."

Sarah looked over to him, but made no efforts to disagree. "It's not like it would change a lot, don't you think?" he continued with a bitter chuckle she could not quite understand, "but most importantly, you could be happy, leave everything behind that weighs you down." Sarah's voice crackled when she carefully asked, "what do you mean by that?" "You have so many associations with this nightmare. And as long as I am a part of your life, this is not going to change." "No, Sam. It is. But regardless: You promise me a better life, you... wish to solve all of my problems, but shouldn't this be my decision? Whatever you want me to do, whatever you hope for, I don't care at all. I want you to be part of my life. I want you to be the part of my life." The terrier just stared at her wet face for a long moment, then fiercely pushed her away. "Great. Now get your butt out of my bed," he stated to her surprise and averted his look. Not entirely trusting her ears, the she-wolf looked down at him with a sudden fear and rolled closer again, pressing her snout softly into his side, "what do-" "Get out of here!" Sam yelled and threw her to the bed's edge where she lay panting and inert until he jumped up and headed for the door himself. "Sam, I-" "Whatever. I guess the couch's mine for tonight. Don't you dare to follow me again." She could only watch in fear as he stomped off. Rarely had she seen him as furious, as... out of control.

Next morning came, although Sarah barely was able to sleep, imagined what might happen, before she heard the door handle move and a similarly tired terrier entered. He plainly stared at her for a moment how her neck bent opposite to the rest of her body while she nervously watched him over her shoulder before eventually Sam flopped on the bed's edge, his back turned to her, head buried in his palms. She hesitated for a moment, but then decided to move closer, leaned into his back, but still he felt unable to raise his voice. "How are you?" the wolf carefully asked while caressing his neck and reached around to his bare chest. A soft grunt escaped the terrier's lips and he eventually took control of her paws, hindering them of proceeding further and influencing his judgement. "You know all too well, that this is not the topic right now." "No, it's actually the most important point. So... have you made up your mind?" she responded and increased her efforts until he stopped resisting, but instead sunk reluctantly back into her arms. A good minute passed before he carefully started again, "I have, but you might not like the conclusions. I won't change, Sarah. This is who I am and although I can still try to divert more time to you, as soon as it gets as tough again, we'll be back here. If this is what you're worried about and you still require him, then I'm sorry, but in this case I see no alternative but to quit immediately whatever we're attempting here and you take the more pleasant way out until it's too late." He paused for a second, letting her consider before he slowly turned around to look right in those beautiful eyes, "if however you want to stand this through with me, I came to realise that there's nothing that would make me happier. Despite everything I've said yesterday, I... don't want to give up that easily." Sarah's eyes glistened happily as she pulled him close, though a little sorrow undertone snug into her words, "it's not going to be easy, is it?" "It surely won't be, but that's what we're here for, right? When has it ever been between us?" he muttered and sank into her lap while the she-wolfs head came to rest lightly on his belly. "What are we even doing here?" the dog eventually continued with a sigh, running his fingers carefully through her scruff, "We're picking up fights we're not supposed to win. I mean... even since our first date, there was nothing but resistance. It's like we're doomed to fail." He didn't seem to actually believe what he said there, she didn't need to know him as well to notice the thought he had put into it nonetheless. And despite hoping for the opposite, she had to agree. "Yet another reason to fight," she finally chuckled though and turned around to lay down next to him. Samuel's head sunk into the mattress, now left without a comfortable pillow, but his grunt was soon to be cut off by another muzzle locking onto his. The short trembles running though the connection ceased while he breathed in this wonderful scent of hers and once they released each other again, for the first time during the past months, it actually felt like they could break the cycle.