Doodle Story: Down and Dirty
#8 of Pokemon/Digimon War
Volsar continues his search to find some help so he can return to his original size and assist his allies. But the help he finds isn't exactly what he's looking for, and Lucario shows up again and makes things worse.
Guest appearance by
Doodle Story: Down and Dirty
Volsar grumbled as he finally reached the top of the mountain, only to realize that he was merely climbing a very large boulder that he, if he was at his normal size, could've easily hopped up on. Instead, he pissed away another twenty minutes trying to scale the rock because he didn't feel like trying to find an alternate route. On the bright side, he had scaled the boulder (which had been blocking his path, with no way around it) and he stopped having his chronic blackouts. Unfortunately, he still reeked of excrement (thanks to Lucario), he was still in his shrunken state, and he was alone and defenseless and had no idea what was going on. His head was still throbbing, so most of his powers were gone. Luckily, he could see and hear clearly. The tiny abra slid down the boulder and landed on the other side, stepping into a mud puddle. He looked all around the area and sighed. The place was still quiet, even though three hours had passed and a war was raging on between the Digimon and Pokémon, which meant he had some time to relax or find another useful ally in the area. He still wondered what would happen if Lucario had spotted him, and was even starting to regret ending his pursuit. But then again, he did shit all over his body. Although it was unintentional, Volsar really did not want to be around him after that episode-at least, not his ass. He thought about shouting out for someone, but the abra knew hostiles could be in the area, and didn't want to attract the wrong kind of attention. Just because no one wants to eat an abra smothered in shit doesn't mean they won't hesitate to crush it underneath their feet. So he remained clandestine, and even stopped walking so he could lie in a ditch and observe his surroundings, checking to make sure he wasn't being followed. No one was there, short of the birds chirping in the trees. He stood back up and continued to walk through the grass. That is, until he heard chattering up ahead and saw two large figures headed his way. He ran as fast as he could over to an oak tree and crouched down near the bark so he could observe the two. It was a nidoqueen and nidoking-Pokémon, and more importantly, allies. Not as wise as Lucario, but they were allies nonetheless, and he could certainly use their help. He stepped out of hiding and approached them...and then he suddenly stopped. The last time he approached someone, he almost got stomped on and then nearly drowned in excrement. Volsar backed away and observed the two again, deciding it was best for them to discuss whatever they were gonna discuss.
"The whole forest is in the middle of a war right now, and you want us to get sidetracked because you're too horny to care about anything else?" asked the nidoqueen.
"C'mon, you don't need to have an attitude. You always love doing it with me! And besides, there's no one around, no bad guys to ambush us, no friends who will go and tattle about what it is we do in these woods. Don't you wanna have a little fun?"
Volsar raised an eyebrow, a bit interested to see the two similar species having sex.
"Yeah...I guess so. You said you were hungry anyway, so this will solve two problems at once."
"Wait, hungry for what?" muttered Volsar.
The nidoking grinned widely and almost started hopping up and down with glee, waiting for the nidoqueen to get into position. Initially, Volsar thought the nidoqueen would bend over and let the nidoking dominant her by fucking her doggy-style. But to his surprise, it seemed that the nidoqueen was the dominant one in whatever they were doing. The nidoking lay down on the ground, looking up at the sky as though he were waiting for something. Then the nidoqueen stood over his body, got on her knees, and bent over just enough so her butt was resting only a few inches above the male Pokémon's head. The female giggled and rubber her stomach as it growled, feeling a tad bit of discomfort in her bowels. The shrunken abra knew what was going on now. Whoever these two were, they had a thing for ass-play, and Volsar suspected that the nidoking was going to rim his female counterpart until she came. But once again, Volsar was surprised. As he waited for the nidoking to stick his tongue out and raise his head, he instead witnessed him opening his whole mouth as wide as he could. The nidoqueen began to grunt a little and raised her tail after forming two fists. Then the abra frowned once he saw a thick, steamy log of dung slowly ooze its way out of the nidoqueen's rear-end, and plop into the nidoking's mouth. The nidoking didn't even try to spit it out or even chew it-he grabbed it with his teeth and swallowed it with one loud gulp. Afterwards he opened his maw again and started to pant, begging for more. The nidoqueen looked behind her shoulder and grinned, shaking her ass in his face a little. Her tailhole bulged outwards and she blew a hot fart in his face that reeked heavily of sulfur and lasted for five seconds, before another one came out, shorter than the last. The next thing she knew, her tailhole was widening, and another stinky lump of brown shit was creeping out of her anus. After she pushed out the five-inch long turd, it plummeted into the nidoking's mouth, and he quickly gulped it down without hesitation. Then she suddenly sharted all over his muzzle, squirting out a malodorous, wet supply of diarrhea and flatus at the same time. As strange as it seemed, neither of them seemed to care-the nidoqueen merely giggled with an "oops" expression on her face and the nidoking simply licked all the diarrhea off like it were chocolate. Volsar continued to watch with disgust as the nidoqueen resumed passing gas and squirting sloppy shit-balls all over his face, some so wet it almost looked like diarrhea. Normally, he wouldn't oppose this type of fetish. He actually liked it, and would sometimes willingly participate in it or watch. But his head was pounding and he wasn't in the mood to be surrounded by the fetid stench of shit. As a result, the acts the nidoqueen and nidoking were performing disgusted him. He retched loudly as his face turned green and he ran behind the tree bark, unable to watch anymore. Vomiting would only make him feel worse.
The nidoking sighed heavily and lowered his mandible, revealing his serrated teeth, before the nidoqueen grunted and blew another foul, warm fart in his face that sounded like a motorboat. He murred as he felt her gas blowing on his face, and his eyes grew wide as yet another lump of sticky, slimy shit crawled out of her anus. It was only a couple of inches long, but the nidoking vehemently gobbled it down, chewing on the lump of scat as it got caught in-between his teeth and on the roof of his mouth. Another two followed the previous one with a loud squish-both of which were also collected orally-before the nidoqueen let out a squeaky, airy fart that sounded like a balloon deflating. The king lifted his head and flared his nostrils and murred ecstatically as he sniffed her funky ass. She responded by dropping a rather large mound of scat in his mouth. The king almost choked on her scat-it all came out in just a couple of seconds-but he closed his mouth and moaned pleasantly as he started to chew all the chunky, smelly lumps of excrement stuck inside his mouth. The queen looked down at the king's crotch and saw that his cock was popping out of his sheath, long and hard and waiting to be sucked on. She was about to blow him, but knew that he was still a bit hungry and wanted more food to eat. So she grunted again and lowered her ass so it was directly over his nose, before passing gas again. The sound and stench were equally revolting, and the nidoking felt a bit more diarrhea dripping out of her tailhole onto his face, but he didn't mind, and flared his nostrils as he inhaled her shit-reeking flatulence. Then her tailhole widened and he opened his mouth again as more defecation began to plummet down. This time it happened to be hot, liquid scat that slithered out of her butt with little difficulty, and splattered inside the nidoking's filthy maw. She sighed with much relief as the diarrhea was excreted, getting a little turned on herself when she realized she was a little wet. The nidoking was fully erect though, his hard-on throbbing as it waited to get sucked on. But the nidoqueen just continued to shit in his mouth, and the nidoking continued to noisily lick up all the liquid shit. He even went as far as shoving his maw directly against her tailhole so he could noisily slurp it all down, moaning as he did so. He was making quite a mess of things as the diarrhea went flying in multiple directions. Volsar curiously peeked around the corned of the tree bark, wondering if they were finished yet. He found the two Pokémon still having a disgustingly fun time with the nidoqueen's shit, looking too relaxed. He had no idea how something so nasty and stinky could make someone so horny and calm, but then again, he had a splitting headache, and he knew that if he didn't, he wouldn't hesitate to get shat on by that nidoking. But as he looked at the masculine Pokémon slurp up the feminine one's smelly, watery shit, he couldn't help but gag, and hid behind the tree bark again.
The nidoqueen stopped defecating all over the nidoking and waited for him to lick all the shit out of her smelly rump before she stared down at his luscious, red cock. She bent down, exhaling her warm breath onto the thick copulatory organ, before she laughed and lowered her head and started to suck him off. And then she flicked her eyes to her left and saw Lucario staring at them. She removed her mouth and stared back at him, at a loss of words. The nidoking remained horny, unaware of the other Pokémon's presence. He was beginning to wonder why she had suddenly stopped, but eventually, he glanced over to his left and saw Lucario too. Their eyes grew wide.
"What the fuck are you doing?" he asked.
Lucario usually refrained from using profanity, but when he saw the two creatures in such a perverted and vulgar position, that was really all he could say. The nidoking, embarrassed, shoved the nidoqueen off of him and got to his feet, panting as he walked towards Lucario.
"I-I-I know what it looks like, but it wasn't that way. See, I-I was hungry, right? And there was no food around-"
Lucario backed away and held up his right paw, signaling the nidoking to stop talking. He used his adjacent paw to cover his muzzle as he grimaced.
"Your breath is terrible. Perhaps you should explain so I won't gag?"
The nidoqueen rushed over to Lucario, embarrassed just like the nidoking was.
"Look, we just taking a walk through the forest when we thought about taking a break for a short-just a short minute! We got a little...heated...then I was on nidoking...then I was defecating in his face...and I was gonna suck on his penis..."
The more she talked, the quieter her voice got. She looked down at her feet and started to kick the dirt, her cheeks redder than ever. Volsar finally stopped gagging and looked up to see the nidoqueen and king and Lucario all only a few feet away from him. He started to run for Lucario, making sure to stay as far away from his ass as possible.
"I don't care what you guys do in your free time or how revolting it may be. We're in the middle of a crisis! We do not have time to play around and eat fecal matter from someone's ass!"
There goes that profanity again.
"How'd you even know we were over here?!" asked the nidoking.
"I could smell the both of you half a mile away!"
You don't need to be talking; your shit doesn't smell like mint chocolate either, buddy, thought Volsar. The tiny abra started to head towards Lucario again. Only this time, he wasn't going to shout his name. He was gonna make contact with him directly, and hope that once Lucario looked down, he'd spot him trying to crawl up his leg. As Volsar started to sprint towards him, Lucario sighed and rubbed his head.
"While you guys were performing your seemingly grotesque and malodorous acts, did you happen to see Volsar? I can't find him anywhere."
"How the hell should we know?!"
Lucario gagged and backed away from the nidoking, his eyes almost watering.
"Please don't open your mouth again."
"No, Lucario, we haven't seen him." said the nidoqueen.
The Aura Pokémon sighed again. "Maybe he's already regrouped with the others. C'mon, let's get going. If I'm lucky, we'll find a pack of breath mints for you around here, Nidoking."
"NO! You stupid son of a bitch-I'M DOWN HERE!!!" shrieked Volsar.
Volsar was going to lose Lucario again, and two allies with some serious bulk that could really help him during his journey. He couldn't risk that again. It wouldn't be nighttime for several more hours, but by the time he found another ally, the sun would probably be setting. It took him three hours just to find the nidoqueen and king, and they weren't even looking for Volsar. So the abra scurried along the grass and stood next to Lucario's left foot. Without thinking or planning ahead, Volsar opened his mouth wide and bit down on the Pokémon's foot.
"I don't know how bad the situation's-"
Lucario yipped when he felt a stinging sensation in his left foot. He immediately lifted it and looked down to see the abra clinging onto it and biting into his flesh. He thought it was a bug, an odd, rather oversized bug, but a bug nonetheless. When you're being bitten by something, you don't take the time to examine what kind of bug it is, or why it bit you, or if the bug is a father or mother of a thousand other baby bugs. You just squash it or flick it away. And that's what Lucario did with Volsar. He grumbled and jerked his leg forward as hard as he could; kicking the air in such as fashion that someone would think he was playing with an invisible soccer ball. Volsar didn't expect that to happen. He expect Lucario to scan his aura, or at least bother to wonder why the "bug" that bit him was yellow and looked oddly like an abra. As a result, he didn't cling onto Lucario very hard, and went flying high into the air. He disappeared into the canopy before the trio even had time to look up, screaming as he went soaring into the clouds, feeling like Team Rocket everytime they "blast off." Lucario raised an eyebrow after hearing the high-pitched screaming.
"Did you guys hear something?"
"Hear what?"
"...Nevermind. Let's get going."
Luckily, Volsar survived the fall. Somehow, he landed in a stream and, although it still hurt, the water cushioned the fall, and the abra was alive. He opened his eyes and quickly swam to the surface (even though the water was merely two feet deep) and doggy-paddled his way to shore. Once he finally got on land, he coughed up some water and collapsed onto his back, panting so hard his chest was puffing in and out. On one hand, Volsar was still alive, and the dried-up dung had been washed off his body. But on the other hand, he was once again alone, he was still tiny, his head was still throbbing, and he had no idea where he was. The abra sighed and swore to himself.
"Thanks, Lucario. You couldn't have possibly made this situation any worse."
But Volsar was wrong again. As he looked off in the distance, he heard low growling and saw a bunch of leaves fall to the ground. Something was coming his way, something big, and something Volsar figured was definitely not friendly.
"Oh, shit."