Aran Comes Around
A quiet and somewhat chilly early afternoon. Aran Conall got out of a bus in the suburbs of Hedgetown, carrying a duffel bag. It had been eight weeks since he had graduated, and he hadn't paid Jennifer a visit since. Adjusting to his new life had been difficult at first, but now he had settled, he thought it would be good to pay his former caregiver a visit.
The black wolf wanted to ring the doorbell, but the door opened before his finger could press the button. In the doorframe stood a female border collie in her early thirties, wearing a brown apron, over an emerald green skirt that reached to just below her knees. She put a finger to her muzzle, signing Aran to be quiet.
"Hi Aran," she whispered. "It's naptime, so please keep your voice down until we're in the living room."
He nodded, and silently followed Jennifer inside. The wolf put his bag down next to the couch, then joined the collie at the dining table.
"Would you like a drink, dear?"
"Yush, please. Um, can I have some juice?"
Jennifer smiled.
"For old times' sake?" she asked.
Aran smiled and nodded.
"Do you have a new charge yet?" he queried as the collie joined him at the table.
"No, not yet. It's too early, so we'll have to take our time."
"How's she doing anyway? Is she further along than I was after ten weeks?"
"Her issues are different from yours, and I've had to spend a lot of time to gain her trust first. She'll overcome her challenges eventually, but I'll have to be gentle."
The wolf drank from his cup.
"Is that normal? I-I mean, does it happen often?"
"Not often, but I've seen it before. One of our charges recently graduated at one of my colleagues. He had been in the program for about a year, and he's even had a fellow charge graduate sooner than himself. It's okay, though, such occasions are rare, and the little sheppy just needed time to overcome all of his issues."
"So did I, right?"
Jennifer gently ruffled the fur between Aran's ears.
"You did, but I sometimes regret we've had to let you go this early. I really enjoyed taking care of you. But alas, everyone has to grow up eventually. Speaking of which, what's your life like nowadays?"
"I've become good friends with Gina, you know. She still acts a little childish every now and then, but that's okay. When I was at her place last week, I saw she still has her stuffed elephant lying on her bed."
The collie chuckled.
"You're not telling me you've let go of Damian already, have you?"
Aran's ears folded flat against his head, thinking of the husky plushie in his bag. He then remembered something.
"Oh, there's something I wanted to tell you," he said. "I've been to a concert of Obvious Reasons last week. Guess whom I ran in to?"
Jennifer shrugged.
"My old pal Damian, the jackal."
"How wonderful! Was it good to see him again?"
"Yush, very much so. We've exchanged phone numbers, and we're going to try rebuild the friendship we had. He once was the brother I never had, so I'd love to relive that bond."
Aran drank from his cup again.
"What about your other friend?" the collie asked. "The one you live with?"
"Mike? He... I've tried to explain how my therapy has changed me. I also told him I doubted whether it'd be healthy for me to live with him again as soon as he'd be released."
"So what happened?"
"When he got out, he wanted me to prove the story I told him, so I showed him my certificate. He also saw my plushie, and I even dug up my pacifier from its hiding place. T-there... I've hardly slept a night without it. Somehow, it helps preventing nightmares a great deal."
"You're ashamed of that, aren't you?"
The wolf nodded.
"Don't be, Aran. It might feel silly or childish to you, but if it's working and it makes you happy, is it really that silly?"
A short silence lasted between the two of them.
"Anyway, how did Mike react?"
"He asked me to explain again why I had to go through this process. Somewhere along the line, he understood the principle, and I noticed he found it hard to not break down and cry. He told me how he recognized some of his own issues in my personal history, and he now realized he could use some help, too."
"Wow, that sounds amazing. Has he sought any help?"
"Well, I'm teaching him what I've learned here, and I can see it's working. Progress is slow, but Mike is becoming a better bear. He has some troubles giving up the pride he once put in being a tough guy, but he wants to change."
"Why is that? He was content with his life, right?"
"Maybe something happened when he was in prison, dunno. He also said he didn't want to lose me, and if he'd be a bad influence on me, he wanted to change so we wouldn't have to part ways. He's still wearing his friendship pendant, Jen. It says 'we fight together, we die together' on the back. Mike wants to hold to that promise, even though it means changing his very way of living."
Jennifer nodded. "He might've made some poor choices in the past, but it sounds like he has a good heart. Keep supporting him, Aran. You won't be disappointed in the end."
The wolf drank the last juice from his cup.
"Lastly, how's your relationship with Eleanor?"
Aran pondered for a few seconds.
"A lot better, I guess, although there's plenty of room for improvement still. I don't think it can be hastened, and I don't believe it should, either. A few weeks ago, I introduced her to Gina, and they appear to like each other. I've decided not to move in with her, because I ultimately don't want to go back there. Besides, I want to be there for Mike."
"I'm proud of you, Aran. You've made some important steps on the path to becoming a responsible young adult wolf."
"Thanks," he replied, looking away. Aran found it hard to take the compliment.
"Naptime will be over soon, so I'm going to the nursery. Are you coming with me?"
He nodded, then followed her up the stairs, into the still-familiar hallway. The wolf had spent several months in there, and sometimes, when he felt bad, he missed the collie's motherly care a lot. Contrary to what he expected, the door of the boys' nursery was open. Jennifer told him to go in, undress, and wait for her, while she'd go wake up her kitten.
Aran closed the door behind him, mostly out of habit, but also because he felt uneasy about being naked in front of Jennifer. A silly thought, of course, and he was aware of it. Still, he hadn't seen the collie for quite some time now, and even though she had been his caregiver, he was no longer her 'puppy', and he wasn't used to such intimate care anymore.
Almost blank-mindedly, he began do undress. The laces of his boots took agonizingly long to untie, and he accidentally tied one of them into a knot instead of freeing it. Blaming it on his nerves, he shook his head and continued, putting his boots under the wooden chair next to the crib.
His collar was next, and he briefly looked at the accessory, knowing its accompanying tag was still gone, although it was somewhere in the very house he was visiting. Soon, his shirt and cargo pants followed, which he loosely folded and placed on top of the chair. Left in only his boxers, the wolf hesitated, until he was startled by the sound of someone knocking on the door.
"Um, come in?" he said.
Jennifer opened the door and entered the nursery. She was carrying Aran's duffel bag, which she put down next to the changing table.
"Are you nervous?" she asked, eyeing at his tail.
The wolf suppressed a whimper. He hadn't noticed his tail finding its way between his legs.
"It's okay, little one," the collie reassured, but then covered her muzzle with her hand. "Oh, I'm sorry. Are you alright with me calling you 'puppy' again?"
Aran nodded shyly, after which Jennifer calmly picked him up by his shoulders, and under his knees. With a fluent move, she put him down on the changing table.
"This is your last chance to back out, wolfie. I haven't told her about your visit yet, and even if she has picked up your scent, she won't know you offered to play puppy with her. Are you sure you want to go on with this?"
"I-I do, but it's... y'know, embarrassing. I've done my best to be a responsible adult over the past two months, and now, I'm suddenly putting it back on the shelf again."
"Don't worry, pup. I'll help you take it off that shelf before you leave. Besides, if at any moment you feel uncomfortable, just call me, and you can grow up again, okay?"
He nodded once again, but his tail still expressed a different opinion.
"Let's see what we've got here," Jennifer mused, zipping open Aran's bag.
She briefly rummaged through the contents, until she found the two items she was looking for. With a smile on her muzzle, she took Aran's husky plushie and popped his head up from the side of the changing table.
"Hello Aran," she said with a high-pitched voice. "I wanna cuddle with you."
Her playful attempt relieved some of the tension in the small wolf's body. She handed over the plushie, then popped Aran's pacifier in his muzzle. With his view on his own privates blocked, he wouldn't be as embarrassed anymore.
Jennifer made use of the distraction she had created by quickly taking off her "puppy's" underwear. From one of the shelves of the changing table, she took a diaper of the brand Aran used to wear when he still was her charge. The wolf was not only small, but also light, which allowed Jennifer to lift his bottom without having to ask for help.
Like the professional she was, the collie slid the unfolded diaper under Aran's rump, then expertly taped it up. She offered him a hand and helped him sit up, after which she corrected the tail hole of the diaper. The collie could tell her puppy was still embarrassed, but his nerves had calmed down a great deal.
"How would you like wearing this?" she asked, holding up the puppy blue sleeper Aran had worn a lot.
"For old times' sake?" he countered.
"I was hoping you'd recognize it."
"Yush, it's okay. I don't really intend to show off my diaper anyway."
After 'helping' Aran into the sleeper, she took his hand and lead him down the stairs. The wolf carried his husky plushie with his free hand, letting its body rest on his forearm. In the living room, Jennifer motioned him to stop and stay quiet for a moment. She opened the door of the playroom and slipped in, leaving it ajar.
"Hi there little one," Aran could hear her say. "Are you enjoying yourself?"
A faint purring sound emanated from the playroom. The wolf smiled.
"I've got a surprise for you, kitten. There's a very special guest for you."
She pulled the door open again, signing Aran to come in. As soon as the black striped white kitten inside realized who her guest was, she got on her paws, ran towards the wolf, and pounced him. He staggered, but he didn't fall over.
"Awan!" the cat said, her tongue hindered by her pacifier. "I'sh miffed you lots!"
He took his own pacifier out with his free hand.
"I kinda missed you too, I guess. It's good to see you again, Luna."
"I'll let the two of you catch up for a while. I suppose I don't have to tell you to be good, do I?" Jennifer said.
"Was I ever bad?" Aran joked.
The collie chuckled as she closed the playroom door, leaving her kitten with her guest.
For the next half an hour, the 'little ones' talked about what they'd done during the months they had spent separated from each other. Aran noticed Luna sometimes found it difficult to phrase herself, mostly because she had been dealing with some serious issues. He encouraged her to keep on being the good kitten she was, and praised her for the progress she had made so far.
As an answer, she embraced him once more, and they cuddled until Luna let go. She asked what he wanted to play, but Aran found it hard to get into 'puppy mode'. He hadn't regressed since he graduated, consciously nor unwillingly - mostly because he hadn't felt the need to. Having his pacifier and Damian close to him at night was enough to feel good.
He suggested they'd draw each other a picture, and Luna eagerly took the drawing equipment out. She mock apologized for still not having any charcoal, at which they both laughed. Eventually, Aran selected an ordinary soft gray pencil, took one of the sketchbooks, and began planning his drawing.
Luna, however, had some difficulties getting started. She tried sketching a few times, but got frustrated and erased her lines again.
"Carmel," she said to her wolf plushie, "whaddya fink I should draw?"
Aran stifled a laugh. He enjoyed the kitten's childish behavior.
"You fink I should ask the otha' woofie? That's a good 'dea!"
She took her pacifier out and turned to her guest.
"Hiya Aran. Watcha drawin'?"
He looked up from the sketchbook and put his pencil down.
"I'm drawing my wish for you, Luna. So if you don't mind, I'd prefer if you didn't watch, so it's a surprise. Would that be okay for you?"
Her ears drooped, but she nodded.
"You got me an idea, though. Thankies," she said, then turned back to her own drawing.
Time passed, although neither of the little ones knew how much. They could only tell time by the sound of the clock in the living room ticking away the seconds, as the direction of the sunlight through the high windows of the playroom changed and turned. Aran knew the autumn afternoon wouldn't last long, and it would eventually be mealtime.
He had agreed with Jennifer to stay over for dinner, though, so that wasn't a problem. The wolf only wondered if he'd spend it as a big wolf or as a little puppy, but time would tell. Contrary to Luna, he had the permission to choose as he pleased on that account. However, a feeling deep down told him he'd play puppy until the kitten's bedtime.
Jennifer mostly left the little ones to themselves, only interrupting them once to bring them juice and some cookies. There was a sippy cup and a bottle, and she told them the sippy cup was for Aran. He offered to feed Luna her bottle, which she silently agreed to. It felt a bit weird to the wolf, since he'd never done so when she was still his 'sister', but they both enjoyed the experience.
Aran's drawing had made a lot of progress, and he was almost done with the lines. He would only do some simple coloring to finish the image, as the drawing didn't need anything complex to it. As he downed the last bit of his juice, the wolf felt a familiar sensation in his lower abdomen, one he hadn't felt that soon for a while.
During his time as Jennifer's puppy, his body had adjusted to a certain regular rhythm of consumption and voiding. Most charges eventually developed the reflex of having to pee whenever they were fed a bottle or got a drink from a sippy cup. The wolf assumed being back in a diaper had reinstated this same effect within him.
He glanced at Luna. She was focused on her sketchbook, idly playing with Carmel's fur every now and then. The kitten didn't appear to pay attention to him, and Aran let out a contended sigh. He tried his best to not show any shame or hesitance. After he had graduated, it had taken him a few weeks to stop wetting the bed, but he hadn't used a diaper on purpose since.
With his eyes closed, he concentrated on his bladder, trying to release the pressure. It took a while, but relatively soon, he was slowly yet steadily wetting his diaper. Now nature's call was answered, he felt better and less tensed. He dug around in the tin can of pencils, settling with a yellow color. The wolf chuckled at the irony.
Eventually, Jennifer returned to tell her little ones it was dinner time. Before they'd leave the playroom, she sat down with them, however, and asked what they had drawn. Aran showed his picture first. He had drawn Luna, wearing a yellow sundress. She was holding a something above her head with both hands. A Chainbreaker graduation certificate.
The kitten hugged and snuggled Aran, thanking him for such a nice gift. Jennifer remarked she'd put it on her fridge until the actual graduation, after which the cat could take it home with her. Luna then showed what she had drawn. Her picture was a close-up of Aran's face, getting a lick on his muzzle. From Gina.