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The whole school was abuzz the next morning with news of who made the swim team and who didn't. The full list was posted outside Coach O'Brien's office for everyone to see.

Swim Team

Girls

Albrecht, Brynn

Foxworthy, Kittara

Gavin, Loni

Marlow, Sherri

McCray, Tanisha

Moreno, Krista

Rand, Denise

Santos, Reba

Soledad, Christie

Tibbett Lexi

Boys

Blackwood, Kris

Candelaria, Florentino

Devreaux, Marcus

Dodson, Ennis

Fortier, Trent

Foxworthy, Audio

McNiel, Jarod

Munn, Quinton

Nolan, William

Dastinon

Along with the list of swimmers, including all of the new recruits to the team, the coach had listed the bruising schedule that he'd outlined to the five returning members that bright Tuesday morning.

Scheduled practices were Monday, Wednesday and Friday after school, Tuesday and Thursday before school, and every other Saturday starting this weekend. That last one was marked as "strength training," which had the kits curiously looking forward to a change in the old routine.

Kris had just walked into the athletic annex when Kittara called him over to see the list of new swimmers. "Kris, you made the top of the boys list!" She ran a few feet to grab his hand and pulled him toward the board where the posting was. "Look!"

For a moment everyone's attention was on the raccoon who just snorted and lifted a finger to point at the list of names. "It's alphabetical, Kitt. See? You're second on the girls list because you're last name starts with an F." He frowned a little at the last name on the boys list since it was so odd. "Why is this one last? Either they forgot his last name, or he's in the wrong spot and they forgot his first name." He tapped Dastinon's name a few times with his finger, then shrugged.

"Oh, that's Dastinon -- he doesn't have another name. Just the one." Kittara seemed rather too enthusiastic about knowing this piece of information that everyone else didn't.

Audio pushed her shoulder and jerked his head in the direction of the otter in question. "Hey, isn't that him? The guy you were drooling over all day yesterday?" He danced a few steps back as the vixen took a swing at him. "Hey, it's not my fault! Everyone in the school was talking about it, you know!" He giggled at rattling his cousin, then pulled Kris down so he could whisper to the taller boy, "I think she has a bit of a crush on the handsome otter boy."

The Foxworthy's banter usually made Kris smile, but not today. He was still fighting with how he felt about the events of this summer, and it kept distracting him at the worst possible times. He'd be fine, going about his business, then something would remind him of Sean -- a sound, a scent, a physical touch -- and he'd be right back in that room with his best friend holding his head down as he tried to fight for breath. For a moment, the scene went black, and he was back in the bedroom again, pushing hard with his hands but not having the leverage to get away from the insistent grip of his best friend holding him down. He shook his head and came back to the conversation just in time to find the otter boy holding his hand out in greeting. All three of the other kits were smiling up at him, which only made things worse. Taking the otter's hand he shook it perfunctorily then made some bogus excuse about needing to hurry to his first class, so he could get out of there before he was forced to cry in front of someone he'd never met before.

Kittara frowned as Kris just sort of drifted away from them toward the changing rooms without saying more than hello to Dastinon. "I'm sorry; he's been acting a little strange like that for the last week or so. He's really a nice person, once you get to know him." She turned and smiled at the otter hoping the older boy wouldn't think too badly of Kris' lack of manners this morning. "Are you all ready for the day? Mr. Mitsuda promised to start a new and interesting series of books with us, as long as he can clear it with the school's board of directors." When Audio made a face at her, she added, "Oh, and this is my cousin Audio. Don't mind him; he's still a child."

The conversation, as it was wont to do when the Foxworthy's got picking at each other, devolved into veiled insults and snide remarks that had all three kits giggling as they headed toward their respective classes.

* * * * *

Sitting in his office was usually soothing to the horse -- he knew he was alone there and didn't need to worry about anyone just walking in -- but now there was a second desk in the corner that reminded him every time he glanced in that direction that he now had to share his domain. It was a good trade off, getting help to handle the more numerous members of the swim team this year at the price of half his office, but it still rankled a little.

Jaz wasn't so bad really -- quiet and dedicated to the job, if not the kits. But he was a bit of a conundrum when it came to dealing with the boys.

So far, every time Venn had asked him his opinion about one of the girls, he was spot on, but the moment he asked the otter his opinion about one of the boys, he got tongue tied and bashful. He recognized the signs, and after all, Jaz wasn't that much older than some of the young men he was being asked about, so it was only natural for him to show a certain... shyness when it came to discussing the objects of his daydreams. Venn was fine with him having daydreams about the boys, just so long as they stayed daydreams.

Maybe if he put the otter in charge of the girls' half of the swim team, he could focus more on the two boys who would need him the most this year. He pulled the files for the two young men in question from the stack in the center of his desk and sighed at the names. Kris was a known quantity, or at least a partially known one; after all teenaged boys had a habit of changing their behavior at the least little provocation, and with him still living at home with his old man, there was no telling what could happen from one day to the next.

Dastinon was a total unknown. All Venn had to go on was the boy's transcripts (which were, admittedly, rather impressive) and the fact that he'd already made the Olympic team with a strong showing in freestyle and butterfly, which spoke volumes about his personal drive. Honestly, the best outcome would be if he could get the boys to challenge each other to better and better outcomes. But again, what with teenaged boys being what they were, he'd have to be careful that nothing like the scene with Audio last year happened again.

As he was sorting through the otter's file, he heard a soft knock on his door and absently said, "Come." The door opened nearly silently making his ear flick as he made a note to have maintenance oil the hinges again. "What can I do for you?" He didn't bother looking up yet; sometimes, if he kept doing what he was doing, whoever was interrupting him would go away.

"Coach? If... if you're busy I can come back another time." Kris' voice. He'd know that sound anywhere even in his sleep.

"No, Kris, come on in." Closing the folders, he put them back on the pile then moved the whole stack to the left of his desk and looked up at the young raccoon. "What can I do for you?" He was a bit worried about the boy, especially after he nearly drown last night.

The boy only hesitated a moment longer, looking back over his shoulder either to see who was there or to make sure no one was. The door was much quieter as he closed it behind himself. He took one of the two chairs in front of O'Brien's desk and slumped down dropping his backpack to the floor between his knees. The horse sat back resting his hands on his thighs and waiting patiently to see what the boy would say. "Coach... I'm sorry about last night. I... guess I wasn't thinking very clearly." His muzzle dropped a few more inches, and he seemed to shrink in on himself a little more, dark stains started to appear below his eyes spreading as the tears started to come.

"Hey..." Almost before he knew what he was doing, Venn was around his desk and wrapping the boy in his arms. "None of that now." He made soothing sounds as Kris wrapped his arms around the horse's torso and clung to him, crying like his heart was broken. Venn was totally at a loss as to how he should handle this. Awkwardly, he pet the boy's back and rocked gently back and forth, like his sister used to do with him when he'd needed someone to comfort him. "Hush now, whatever it is, it can't be that bad." Something about the way the boy felt in his arms made him tremble. He liked how it felt to hold this young man. That was wrong though, it wasn't Kris he wanted, it was Rocket, the boy just looked so much like his young paramour that he was getting confused.

The door opened and he looked up into the startled eyes of his new assistant coach. "Jaz, would you be kind enough to go to the office for me and find out what class Kris Blackwood is supposed to be in this morning? Then once you know, send a message to his teacher that he'll be helping me with... with..." He frowned looking around the office for something that he could reasonably have the boy help with.

Help came from a most unexpected quarter, "I'll just say you need a student to help get the paperwork ready for the kits to sign tonight, shall I?" Jaz looked at the raccoon still clinging to Venn and sobbing brokenly with sad eyes, then nodded once and turned closing the door softly behind himself.

Venn didn't know where that came from, but he wasn't going to look a gift askance. Grabbing the other chair that sat in front of his desk he hauled himself into it, shifting so that his knees parted and the boy's body could fit more snugly against his. He kept focusing on trying to soothe the boy, trying to figure out how he could stop the body shaking sobs from coming. He felt so helpless, so ineffective. Here he was, big strong guy, ex-military, SWAT trainer, and all he could do was sit here helplessly while one of his students cried his eyes out.

* * * * *

So much of him wanted to just give up, to just let the darkness take him and say screw the world. The pain in his chest was nearly unbearable anymore; ever since Sean had left, it had been getting stronger and stronger. It felt like he was bleeding from the inside. He'd sought out the Coach because the horse had claimed that he would always be there for him when he needed him, and right now the only thing he could think of was how much he needed someone to help him, to keep him from bleeding out.

He was in so much pain, he just couldn't see past it. Yesterday, after the tryouts, he was just so tired. It seemed so easy to let the water claim him, to let it take him into it's deep embrace, and stop the pain once and for all. He knew he needed help; he just didn't know how to ask for it. So he'd come to Coach O'Brien.

As he sat there trying to tell the horse how sorry he was for giving in, the tears just came. And once they'd started he couldn't stop them. He clung to the only thing that seemed real to him: the warm large bulk of the Coach. Feeling himself wrapped in those strong arms and held against that broad chest, a sense of safety came over him, a feeling that he hadn't had since he was very young. He wanted to say thank you, he wanted to find some way to show the Coach how much he appreciated... no, _needed_his support right now, but the tears wouldn't stop. He was choking on the sobs that seemed to come up from the depths of his heart and boil out through his very skin.

He heard the rumble of the horse's voice that deep warm sound that made his toes curl, but he didn't let go, he couldn't. The pain was too raw, to real inside him to let him release the only bastion of safety in this world of pain and suffering he was being forced to live in. The pain just poured out of him pulling ragged sounding sobs from his throat that hurt almost as much as the pain in his chest.

* * * * *

Jaz closed the door quietly and turned around to lean against it for a moment. He wasn't sure what it was he'd just seen, either the Coach was comforting the boy, or... No, the horse didn't seem like the kind to take advantage of his charge. It was more likely that the boy was emotionally upset over what happened the night before. With a clear conscience, the new assistant coach lifted his shoulders and headed for the office. He could at least give them a little more time for the boy to pull himself together.

* * * * *

It seemed to take forever for the sobs to finally stop, but a glance at the clock told Venn it hadn't been more than a half hour since the boy entered his office. Even though the raw-sounding pain had ceased, he kept stroking Kris' back holding him close as if he could soothe away the hurt with just his presence. Silly to think that just his being there would in any way help the boy get past the pain of having his boyfriend so far away from him, but there you had it.

Eventually, the raccoon pulled away, wiping at his face with his sleeves. "Hold on, let me grab you some tissue." Venn stood and stretched out muscles that were cramped from holding the kit in the same position for so long and reached across his desk to retrieve the box of tissue that was always there. He passed it to the boy softly commenting, "It's a good thing you aren't a girl, or you'd have ruined your make up..."

For a moment, he thought the humor was going to bomb, but then Kris started to giggle using the tissues to wipe at his eyes. "See, you can laugh, the world hasn't come to an end yet." He stroked the long loose curls back from the boy's face and let his palm linger against his warm cheek for a few moments longer than he should. "Want to talk about it?" This time, his voice was soft and concerned.

It took a few moments for Kris to get his eyes wiped and collect his thoughts. "I'm just so confused. I mean about Sean." He raised his eyes to the horse's and took a deep breath. "Everything's so different now. We never expected to see each other again after Dad dragged me all the way down here. Mom having him come spend that week was amazing, it really was. But... he's just so different than he used to be you know?" He blushed a little remembering how possessive and touchy Sean was around the Coach. "Like how he kept touching me even after I asked him to quit. He just doesn't seem to understand that it made me uncomfortable." He lowered his eyes and shifted his feet restlessly.

"I can see where that would be frustrating for you Kris but I don't understand what that all has to do with what happened yesterday evening." Sitting back a little into the chair Venn watched the boy to see if he could gather some clues from the way he was acting.

A frown wrinkled Kris' forehead and he started pulling at the strings on the top of his backpack. "Well... I mean I feel sad you know how it is when someone you like goes away and you don't know when you're going to see them again. It's kind of like that but... there is more to it." He seemed to make up his mind about something and sat up again chewing on his lower lip. "Sean wanted to... to have sex while he was here." He stopped talking and shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

Venn's ears perked up a little and he chuckled. "I sort of expected that, I mean you kept talking about him so much and you seemed into him." He paused for a moment then hesitantly asked, "Did you?" Not sure he wanted to know for sure but the boy seemed to need to talk.

With his eyes still downcast Kris nodded slightly. "Yeah... It... wasn't what I expected." His right arm came up across his chest, hand gripping his left forearm. "Sean was... well he really wanted to, even when I wasn't sure." He felt like he was close to saying something bad about Sean and he didn't want to do that.

Venn's eyes narrowed. "Kris are you saying that Sean pushed you into having sex with him?" It took all his willpower not to clench his hands and jaw t the idea of that little punk forcing Kris into something he wasn't ready for yet.

The raccoon's head came up and he shook it in denial. "No! No, I... I started it." His eyes dropped to avoid the horses gaze and he mumbled, "I mean he didn't make me do anything, I kind of... wanted to find out what it was like." The whole conversation was starting to make him feel bad. He had been the one who woke the cougar by putting his head under the blankets and kissing him. He just hadn't been prepared for Sean's reaction to what he'd done.

The way that Kris was avoiding any details made Venn smile slightly. "Okay so you guys experimented a little and things are different now? Different how? Does he not want to be your friend anymore?" If the randy little cougar had taken advantage of Kris then shut him out Venn was going to track him down and wring his scrawny neck for him.

"No..." there was a strange inflection in Kris' voice like he was hedging around something. "No... it's more like he can't get enough..." The boys ears were burning and Venn couldn't stifle a small chuckle at the admission.

"If I'm understanding you correctly, you had sex with him and now he wants more? Like all the time? And you're separated again so it's kind of ha..." He was not opening that can of worms, "er... difficult to think about anything else now. Is that it?" He was pretty sure that was at least part of it based on the way Kris shifting uncomfortably in his seat. "Well that is kind of natural. Both his wanting more once you've let him have a taste and being frustrated that he can't have it since you're so far apart." He considered how far this conversation could go before it was verging on the inappropriate. "Have you explored other... options?" If he kept it vague enough he might be able to get away with giving the boy some advice.

Kris blushed a little harder and keeping his eyes down on his backpack mumbled, "He keeps asking me to do things on the cam over Skype so he can see..." He wasn't showing signs of being eager or excited about that idea so Venn made an assumption that the boy wasn't overly interested in the idea.

"I take it you don't like that idea. Well it's your body and you have the right to decide who you share it with in any capacity that you might be asked or think about doing. If you aren't comfortable with the idea of showing him things over the internet then you don't have to do it." There he'd skirted the issue and made it clear that the choice was always Kris' as to what he did and didn't do with the Cougar.

"I... I know that..." There was still that sad sound in the boy's voice that had Venn's ears standing on end. "It's just... well he makes me feel bad when I don't want to." Peer pressure was a powerful thing and he could easily see the boy giving into his older friend in order to make the cougar happy.

Trying not to sound angry Venn attempted to get to the bottom of this, if he was understanding it correctly the older boy was pressuring Kris into doing things that he wasn't ready for. That was never acceptable in his mind. "Is Sean asking you to do things that make you feel... uncomfortable?" It was a good thing the randy little jerk wasn't close enough for Venn to get his hands on him or he'd show the boy what it was like to be made to do things that you didn't want to.

The way the boy squirmed on his chair spoke volumes. "Maybe... I mean I'm just not ready for some of the things he wants us to do. And If my Dad walked in and found out he'd kill me you know. I just can't take that kind of chance. So it's hard to talk to Sean now since all he wants to do is explore things we can do over the internet and show each other." There was no way he was going to be able to say any of the things that Sean said while he was doing some of the sexual things he wanted Kris to do as well. It was just too embarrassing.

It sounded like the little punk was playing on Kris' vulnerability and trying to force the issue, which raised the hair on the back of Venn's neck. "Kris, I know you like Sean and you want to keep him happy and stay friends with him but he needs to respect your feelings in this. If you don't feel comfortable tell him. If he's any kind of good friend he'll understand and stop pushing you to do something that could get you in a world of trouble. He already knows how your Dad reacted to just a kiss, just tell him what you're afraid of and he should back off." And if he didn't Venn would get his address from Clawdia and go beat the living tar out of the little reprobate! Minor or no. There was no excuse for pressuring a younger person into doing things just because you couldn't keep your prick in your pants.