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How can someone be so cold when they're this warm? I'm freezing, but I feel so hot. I've never wanted so badly to just curl up and melt... or freeze, or whatever this is. Besides battling with myself, when I run my tongue over my newly lengthened canines... all I want is blood.

"There she is," a voice speaks softly, motherly. "The little freak of nature, finally opens her eyes to join the rest of us." Never mind, then.

I lift my heavy head, blinking a few times, feeling winded. I feel frostbitten, but at the same time, I'm on fire. Before me, a red-haired, vicious looking woman with pale skin and flaming red eyes approaches me. I can't move. My body feels so worn and... fossilized.

She clutches my hair, lifting me off the ground like a runt kitten. Bringing me closer to her eyes that burned hatred into my soul, she hisses at me, "You're mine, mutt."

Mutt? How dare she... what gives her the right? I open my mouth, but I can't speak. I can only think in plain English. Why can't I speak? Where am I, anyway? My heart pounds as I feel the vicious redhead letting go of my hair, dropping me. I'm going to fall - it's going to hurt... it... doesn't hurt at all.

I didn't even fall that far. I look down at my hands - they aren't. They aren't hands. They are white paws.

Paws? Oh... okay... I'm still me. It takes me a while to shake off the daze, but I realize. I remember who I am now. Shaking my head, I look to my paws and sigh.

Jessy. I'm Jessy Griffin... I'm staying with my relatives for the summer. I'm in... Washington. Forks, Washington. My cousin, Leah Clearwater, she was teaching me, and...

I feel myself fall to my side. With a loud yelp of pain, I lose balance of all four paws.

"Are you some kind of defected mutt? I said to listen to me!" the redhead shouted. "I turned you... why are you still a wolf!?"

Turned me? What... that smell... oh - it's coming to me now. I don't know what you did to me, lady, but now I know what you are. You're one of... them!

I bare my fangs and lift my frame from the concrete floor of this dingy looking place. Focusing my glare on the redhead, I bark loudly, causing the floor beneath her to vibrate. I begin stalking close to her - I want to bite her. I need to taste her flesh as it crumbles in my jaws.

But I can't. I feel a sense of remorse and loss.

"I turned you, bitch. You belong to me now. I've done something the Volturi would fear me for - I've turned a werewolf into a vampire." She laughs as I feel my heart pounding, slamming against my fur-coated chest. This is impossible. "You're my little mutt now! My precious little bloodwolf - you will hunt for me, do you understand?"

No... I'm not going to help you survive!

"Do you understand!?" she roars, lifting a stiletto off the concrete, aiming for my skull. Immediately, my muscles force me to lay down, lowering my tail in submission. "Good dog," she laughs, winking a flaming red eye at me. "Ah... about time my love returns."

The doors to the shabby, musky, basement-like room opens and through the door walks a pale man, his blonde hair tied back in a pony-tail. He drags in two bodies - both dead human males. The scent of blood tickles my nose and immediately, my tongue begins to feel dry. My fur stands on end and my paws begin to itch. I want to lunge with all my heart and... I want to eat those people. No, I could care less for the meat, I want the blood.

"Did it ever wake up?" the blonde male says, "That thing? Why'd you do that, anyway... we hunt well enough on our own."

"James, Darling," the redhead giggles, "I wear fur, I sleep in fur, I own all kinds of furs, but not one of them are living. Besides... we train this thing to hunt for us, the Cullen clan will be out of our way. We'll get to hunt wherever we want."

James sighs, "Did it eat, Victoria?"

Her name is Victoria. She's the one Jacob talks about. Now I belong to her... I could attack her right now, but the very thought of even trying makes me feel sick. I just want some blood... please... let me have one taste. One.

_ _ "No, she just woke up. Jessy's a newborn bloodwolf now - it's official. We'll have to keep this a secret, you know." Victoria says, kneeling down before one of the bodies, retrieving a switchblade from her right boot and slicing through the dead man's clothing.

"Well, feed it and get it over with. It's eyeballing the food already - we don't want it to go to waste."

_James, you seem more merciful than Victoria, but... right now, I don't care. I just... I want that._I stand up and lick my lips, feeling my hard, heavy fangs with my tongue as I sigh and step closely to the dead bodies.

The scent of death dances around my nostrils, leaving behind a stench that would make anyone hurl - but it only starves me. I look to Victoria, hunched over the dead man's body, sinking her deadly fangs into the flesh, sucking out his blood.

"Jessy..." James says softly, "Feed on this. You need to... do it now." A sudden chill trails my spine as he flashes his red eyes at me, demanding this of me. I slowly step closer to the dead bodies, feeling that they are still warm when I pull a lifeless arm close to me. They've not been dead long.

I don't want this... I just want to go home. But I'm so hungry... thirsty... I can't believe this. Why... why me?

I lay down and open my maw, revealing my fangs as I sink them without hesitation into the flesh of the dead man. As if pouring, the blood rushes into my mouth, leaving a satisfying warmth on my tongue. Oh... oh God! I begin to chew a bit, nibbling to drain more blood from the arm. Immediately my white lips stain pink as I nourish with guilt. I can feel my stomach calming and my heart slowing down from the adrenaline rush - and soon, I'm at ease.

"You've had enough. Leave now until you are called, do you understand?" Victoria hisses, pointing at me to back away from the body. She notices that I can't help but continue. "I said now!" she says, reaching out and slinging her arm at me, knocking me to my side. A chunk is ripped out of the dead man's arm and falls out of my mouth. "Idiot... James, the dog tore the limb."

"I'm on it, Love, don't worry your fiery head," James says, zipping to the limb and leaning down. I watch as James and Victoria feast on the bodies, having fed me only enough to satisfy my thirst.

"I am to assume you've left enough for me?" says a suave, slightly Jamaican accent. The African American man steps out of the shadows and lightly walks past me, approaching his two comrades.

"Laurent, we were starting to worry," Victoria smiles. "There is plenty - the dog had some, but only to satiate. We'll be training her to hunt today."

"Excellent. And I assume James is okay with this as well?" Laurent nods to James, who nods in return, "Good."

The three chatter amongst themselves, paying me no mind at all. I lay to my side and stretch out my limbs. Can I change back into my human form? I'm growing too comfortable in my wolf body, I need to be sure I can change at will. Focusing my energies, I do as Leah taught me - visualizing myself back to normal, calming myself down. I breathe slowly and soon, I feel a change.

My fur stands on end. That's all. My human form isn't reappearing nor replacing my wolf body. This must be what it is to be a bloodwolf. A vampire wolf... not at all human. Not in stature, not in nature. A blood sucking beast.

I sigh and release a whine, careful not to upset the vampires. I close my blue eyes and do my very best to rest - this is my life now. I could be dead - I should be grateful. Just as I'm beginning to wish I were dead, I feel myself slipping. The warmth of the blood I'd consumed leaves a lovely taste in my mouth, lulling me into relaxation.

The next thing I know, sleep is my mistress.

"Leah!" I said, sprawling my arms open, rushing to my favorite cousin, Lean Clearwater. As usual, her smile is half-assed, but she still managed to return the hug. "How are you? It's been so long!"

_ "I know, heh... we're all doing great here. Come on, Jacob wanted to meet you - and it's time you got in on the family secret, huh? Well..."_

_ I tilted my head, "Well?"_

_ "Well, it's not a family secret. It's a tribe secret."_

_ "Tribe? We're cousins and relatives, but I doubt I have any of the tribe's blood in me..."_

_ Leah turned away from me and started walking toward Jacob's home, "Trust me, Jessy... there's a lot you're going to find out today."_

_ When Leah and I finally got to the fire pit at Jacob's house, I remember sitting down and a lot of other relatives - including some I don't remember meeting gathered around the fire, too. Despite feeling uneasy with all the people around, I stopped worrying and listened as Jacob's father began to speak._

_ "Today we're gathered to welcome our distant relative and tribe descendent, Jessy into our pack," he said, motioning a hand toward me. This seemed to upset a few of the people around the fire._

_ "How? She's... well, come on. She's white!" said one of the boys._

_ "I... don't quite understand, myself, Mr. Black... I..." I'm silenced by a motion to hush as Jacob's father adjusts himself in his wheelchair._

_ _

_ "Our ancestors, believe it or not, were many races, but very few of our tribe members were pale-skinned. These people - these wolves - were often white, and could be easily spotted as half-wolf by their bright blue eyes."_

_ The people around the fire all hush and look to me, almost interested - some, in vain. I began to blush immediately. I remember listening to more of the story, but what caught me off-guard was half-wolf. What does that mean?_

_ "Jessy, tonight you will awaken the power that's been inside you since birth - it's time for you to see who you truly are... and we are all here to help you," Mr. Black said, wheeling himself over to me and touching my shoulder, "Jacob and Leah will help you. Of course, you will train with Sam - good luck, Jessy."_

_ _

_ For an entire week, there has been nothing but running, climbing, and jumping off of high cliffs into staggeringly cold water. That part was fun, but when the time came to awaken this "half-wolf" inside me... that's when things really got weird._

_ Jacob begins running into the open field where we all wait for him. He leaps high into the air and soon, his clothes tear away, floating to the ground like paper - what lands on the ground is not Jacob - but it is. A large, dire-wolf stands in his place._

_ The size of a bear, if not larger, Jacob's wolf form pads up to the rest of us. Everyone else seems pretty relaxed, this is every day for them. For me? I'm terrified._

_ _

_ In less than an hour, I learned how to channel my thoughts and energies deep down inside me... and before I knew it, I stood no longer as some rotund young woman - I was now a slender, muscular, pure-white wolf, almost as large as Jacob's wolf._

_ Suddenly, my thoughts become loud and chatter begins ringing in my ears - I can hear everyone. I open my mouth to tell everyone to please calm down so I can understand... but nothing comes out - only a strange, growling moan. This means the voices are in my head._

_ "Jess," Jacob says. I turn around and face him - it's not his face, but I can tell by his eyes - that's him. "Jess, you can communicate with us. Wolf Telepathy is very important. No matter how far away, we can always communicate. Don't worry - we'll know who you are. Who could miss those rare blue eyes, huh?"_

_ I can tell that he's teasing about how I fit into the heritage. I can feel my large, beastly tail wag slowly behind me, brushing a bit of wind past my haunches._

_ _

_ The rest of the week, it's been all uphill. Every day, I felt stronger and more at peace with my wolf form. In fact, I think I spent way more time in that form than I did being human. I learned that vampires were our enemies from day one - but that didn't bother me. There's no way I'd ever run into any. I'm such a homebody, I'd rarely leave the yard._

_ Until I was put on territory watch with Jacob and Leah, her little brother, just a pup, coming along to learn._

_ "Jess, you take the East border. Leah and Seth, take the west. I'll take care of the North. Some others are close to the South," Jacob says in my mind before taking off North._

_ And that's when we all split up. I guess... maybe I should have been paying more attention. Because not a few minutes after I was left alone, I got bored. I wandered off and had the need to run. Just... run. I needed to feel the wind in my fur and experience this feeling - never ending strength, a slenderness I'd never had. Confidence._

_ I guess I wandered too far away from the base of our look-out, because the last thing I remembered was landing in a stream, looking at my own blue eyes, surrounded by white fur and a wolf's frame. The new me... then suddenly, the scent caught me. I looked up, and there she was._

_ Victoria's red, blazing hair in the distance, looking at me as if I were the most disgusting piece of flesh she'd ever seen. She hisses, and immediately, she dashes toward me faster than humanly possible. I knew right then, she was a vampire._

_ I recall lunging at her, per my instincts, tackling her to the ground. The power overtook me, and all I wanted to do was scare her - I'm not the killing type. I guess I worried too much about how I'd scare her and not how I'd win._

_ Because I didn't. I blacked out after feeling a sharp, acidic pain in my collarbone area. My body began to feel like it was burning alive, and though I lost my sight for a moment, I could still feel and hear all sorts of things behind me. My rustling on the ground as I struggled to contain myself, the stinging, burning pain of the vampire's bite coursing through me... and finally, my body collapsed._

_ The last thing I heard was, "That's one."_

_ _

_ _

_ _ I open my eyes, sighing and sitting up. The two dead bodies are gone and the smell of blood nowhere. I look to my left and there is a pan of water waiting for me.

Do I still drink water? I stand, leaning over the water and lapping it up. _I do... it feels good. I'm so thirsty._Looking down into the water, I can see my reflection. My once vibrant, rare, blue wolf's eyes are now blood red, flaming and angry. My eyes are like the vampire's eyes.

A bloodwolf... a vampire werewolf. I'm the very thing I never thought was possible. The one thing that just cannot be saved.

James bursts into the room, slamming the doors behind him. In his grasp is a young child, crying and trying to get away from him.

"Please, Mister! Just let me go! Mom! Mommy!" the child cries, sobbing and being dragged closer to me.

"Dog... eat this. You'll eat this - you won't ask why and you won't restrain your urge for her youthful blood. You'll do it, and you'd better do it quickly."

Victoria bursts in behind Laurent, slamming the doors to this musky base. They look afraid, staring at me.

"Eat it now!" James says, tossing the child to the floor in front of me. She scrapes her knee on the concrete, drawing a bit of blood from her kneecap.

"No, please... no, puppy, no... please don't!" she begs. I can barely hear her over the loud ringing in my ears. It occurs to me that these vampires are keeping me alive, knowing when I am thirsty and accommodating me. They could have let me die, but even as a beast, they feed me.

I look at her crying face, and down at her bleeding knee. The ruby-red nectar drips slowly down her knee and a drop lands on the floor. I look to James, then to the child.

Yes, Master.