Queen Muz-Ra #12
#16 of Queen Muz-Ra
How to Make Love to an Argonian, by Jarl Balgruuf
Very Carefully...
No. That's a lie. The same damn way you make love to anyone.
33% affection
33% empathy
33% pure animal lust
Deviation from these percentages may still be acceptable, but these are the ideals.
| "Come sit with me Red. You've met Lydia obviously. And Irileth, my most trusted advisor and Housecarl of Dragonsreach over there. Next is Farengar Secret-Fire, our mage and scholar. Next to him is Proventus Avenicci, our Steward and Olfina Grey-Mane. Then at the end here is Carlotta Valentia and my brother Hrongar."
Finally, the Jarl introduced Lady Muz-Ra as his personal friend and ambassador to Castle Kitty to the others. |
"Aren't you my ambassador to Kitty?"
"Well, now that you mention it - yes! I guess I am!"
"You certainly are! I see we have bread and cheese to start the dinner tonight. Some wine perhaps, Red?"
"That would be great! Thank you Balgruuf!" |
"Yes, along with the Argonian warrior Ubergard."
Proventus spoke up at that, "Lady Kitty is quite popular among her tenants I hear."
"Oh yes. Of course, I understand the previous owner had imposed quite a high burden on them. Relief of that alone would explain it."
Olfina joined in at this point. "Surely it's more than that. Most consider the Khajiit to be little more than traders and even then not of the highest standards." |
"Of course, we know better, having dealt with H routinely," the Jarl added.
...the dinner continued, with discussion remaining polite and Muz-Ra soon found herself quite comfortable. The wine probably helped encourage her relaxation. |
"Why thank you Farengar! That's very good to hear. I'm personally known to be a bit crude from time to time, but I do assure you that we Argonians are as diverse in personality as any. Good and bad of all types you know. So please don't take anything I say or do as any more exemplary of Argonians than anyone else. I'm far from a standard example!" |
Irileth rose, but Balgruuf motioned for her to stay.
"That would be fantastic. I've heard a lot about this place, but I don't know how much to believe."
To the other guests, Balgruff nodded his goodnight to them and then took Muz-Ra by the arm and led her to some stairs at the right of the dining area. |
"Well, I_am_ the Jarl after all. They know better than to say anything that would offend me too much."
"Are you a harsh Jarl to serve under?" asked Muz-Ra, before hastily adding at his smirk, "I mean, to work for!"
"That's a hard thing for me to judge, but I don't think so. Perhaps stern, but I'd not say harsh. It's been_months _since I have had anyone beheaded."
Muz-Ra chuckled nervously at that.
"Oh relax, Red. I'm no ruthless dictator. I want you to know you can leave at any time. I don't want your fear, I want your affection!" |
"Never, though I have to admit I was advised to do so. And no, not just by Irileth."
"Sounds like you have your own version of Bhusaran. How much time have I lost due to_your_ advisors?"
"Too much!"
And with that, Jarl Balgruuf embraced Muz-Ra and kissed her passionately. |
"Right now!" she sad without ambiguity, and he led her to a door nearby... |