FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Touch

1.

Because the only words we need to communicate

Are the ones that can help me say

"I do love you"

And that make me understand you love me too

-Basia “Copernicus”

The drake sat at his desk, working on his assignments for his creative writing classes. His deep teal scales glittered softly in the light of his desk lamp, his pale golden eyes glowing. Scrawled across several sheets of paper were various paragraphs of nonsense and terrible lines of poetry. He brought his hands up to his head and rubbed his temples, shutting his eyes and sighing.

“Ezaryn, Darun is out in the fuckin’ bushes again.”

Ezaryn jerked his head up from his desk, turning his head to the left towards the open door to his dorm room. RA Lenyr had flung his door open and stood there, paws on his hips, red in the face and tapping his footpaw. He thumbed towards the hallway, raising an eyebrow when he saw that Ezaryn hadn’t jumped up immediately.

“Are you gonna go pick him up or do I need to call campus police? I’m doing him a favor, here.”

The drake stood up, raising a hand as he quickly stepped forward towards the door, “No, no, that won’t be necessary, I’ll go get him.”

Lenyr nodded and huffed, turning and walking away.

Ezaryn sighed and rolled his eyes at the man, shutting his door and hurrying down the hallway. He’d had to do this a few times already: Darun had a habit of drinking a lot on the weekends and kept ending up in places he shouldn’t be. Last weekend it was the science building’s stairwell, and the week before that it was the parking lot behind the theater, but so far his favorite place had apparently become the azalea bushes on the side of their dorm building, as he’d ended up there multiple times already.

The early afternoon Saturday sun drifted lazily across the sky, stretching and bending the shadows of the lecture halls at Upper Portdam Community College. Sitting beneath the shade of the dorm building was a patch of azalea bushes, and laying in them was the coyote, Darun. Buried deep in the twigs and leaves, his dark black and brown fur almost hid him completely… if it hadn’t been for the fact he was blasting music from his cell phone. The coyote lay there, body contorted and bent, legs splayed, arms spread out, snoring.

Ezaryn sighed, placing his palm on his face as he took in the sight. “Darun… why are you doing this…” he muttered under his breath as he stepped into the bushes, grabbing the front of the coyote’s hoodie and pulling him up off the ground.

The coyote was dead to the world, completely blacked out and his body was limp, dead weight. His head pitched backwards as Ezaryn tugged him upwards, his mouth gaping open, his snoring growing louder. The drake hoisted him up against his shoulder, hunched over, and backed out of the bushes. He lay Darun back down and panted softly as he ventured back into the bushes and picked up the coyote’s cell phone, turning it off and slipping it into his pocket.

“Same song and dance, I guess,” the drake muttered as he squat down and slipped one arm under the coyote’s knees, the other folded under his back, hoisting him upwards and carrying him like a newlywed slowly back to their dorm room.

He stumbled into the dorm and lay Darun down on his bed. He stood up, panting softly and sighed, putting his hands on his hips. The coyote snored loudly and, as if sensing he was in a familiar place, rolled over and curled up. The drake smiled softly, picking up the bed sheet and tucking it across Darun. He turned around and went back over to his desk, sitting back down to continue working on his assignments, turning around every so often to check on the blacked out coyote.

2.

The first thing Darun noticed wasn’t the bed he was laying in, it wasn’t the warmth of the room, or even the gentle sound of the snoring coming from the corner. Instead, it was the man inside his head smashing his brain with a sledgehammer. He sat forward slowly, bringing a paw up to his head, holding it as he winced with each heartbeat throbbing agony through his skull.

His bright orange eyes scanned the room, blinking rapidly as he tried to focus on the six different doorways and desks dancing around in front of him. He leaned forward and clenched his teeth as he tried to force the wave of nausea to pass.

“…Where even am I…?” he muttered, shuddering as the sound of his own voice seemed to exacerbate his hangover.

Ezaryn sat up suddenly, a sheet of notebook paper sticking to his cheek via drool, roused by the coyote’s speech. He took a deep breath, yanking the piece of paper down and turned in his seat to face the coyote.

“Well, good morning, sleepy head,” he said, smiling at the coyote. “How are we feeling, today?”

“…There is a tiny little man in my head currently fucking my brain with a jackhammer,” Darun groaned, holding his head in his paws. He huddled over, shivering for a moment, before he raised his head and looked at the drake sitting at the desk. “How did I even get here?”

Ezaryn averted his eyes, tapping his palm against the back of his chair. “Well… I carried you here… again. It was either that or Hardass Killjoy was going to call campus police on you. Figured you’d appreciate waking up somewhere familiar.” He looked at Darun, his pale golden eyes shimmering from the darkened corner in which he sat.

The coyote looked down at his lap, feeling cold inside as shame crept up into his chest. He balled his paws into fists and squeezed them. The embarrassment never seemed to lessen, regardless if this was the twentieth time this had happened, or the first. He had grown used to ending the night blacked out, but never would he ever, Darun thought, get used to Ezaryn carrying him back to his dorm. He peeked over at his roommate, his ears folding against his head, hiding in his ragged mass of messy black curls. He could feel his cheeks grow red and warm.

“Can I get you anything?” Ezaryn asked, standing up and stepping into the doorway.

“Water, please,” Darun replied, his voice small. He’d be glad to be alone even if for a minute or two.

“You got it.” Ezaryn smiled and departed.

The coyote watched him go, shuddering as his eyes pored over his roommate’s body. He shut his eyes, covering his face with his paw. He felt nauseous for sure, but beneath that was a different kind of disgust at himself for, even now sitting in his bed after having been carried back like he was a baby unable to walk or think straight, checking out his roommate as he left. He felt the sudden urge to jump up and chase after him, his legs growing restless and aggravated, but he resisted. There was no point. What was the saying? Like talking to a brick wall? Yes, that sounded correct - as one does not usually ponder the extent of one’s relationship with that wall… not that Darun wanted to think too hard about it, anyway. That’s what the booze had been for.

The coyote had been too deep in his thoughts, staring blankly at his lap that he didn’t notice the bottle of water floating in front of his face until it cleared its throat at him. Darun shook his head and quickly snatched it up, looking up at Ezaryn, his orange eyes having the faintest sparkle of gratitude, regarding the drake for a moment before he looked away.

“…Thanks,” he muttered and opened the bottle, chugging the cool liquid down. It soothed his insides and he closed his eyes, panting softly after he’d downed half of it.

Ezaryn smiled and sat down on the edge of the bed, turning to face Darun. The coyote bristled at the proximity of the drake but shivered and forced himself to relax, shutting his eyes and taking another drink from the bottle.

“You’re welcome,” Ezaryn replied, his voice low and gentle. He stared at the coyote for a long moment, fidgeting with his hands in his lap before he slowly reached forward and placed his hand on the coyote’s shoulder. “Darun, are you all right?”

The coyote went rigid at the touch, nearly jolting out of the bed as he sucked water down into his lungs. He began to cough violently, hacking it up and out. He panted softly, wiping his mouth with his sleeve, his eyes shut tight. He shrugged the drake’s hand off and nodded.

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure? I won’t pry but-”

“I’m fine, Ezaryn.”

“You’ve been drinking a lot and-”

“I am fine, Ezaryn.”

“Well, I’m just saying, I’m worried-”

“Ezaryn.”

“If you’re upset or-”

“Ezaryn!”

The drake took a deep breath and shut his eyes. He raised his hands and dropped them against his knees, exhaling out an, “Okay.” He returned his hand to the coyote’s shoulder. “I’m here if you need to talk or vent.”

Again the coyote shuddered at the touch, his breath catching in his throat and his arms and legs suddenly freezing, as if all of the heat in his body had begun to recede up into that point of contact on his shoulder, beneath the drake’s palm. He trembled softly and before his brain could tell his mouth to shut up, he murmured:

“I-I don’t know, Aryn… I j-just…” his voice trailed off and he simply sat there and shrugged, bringing a paw up to clutch his throbbing head. Just stop, Darun, he thought.

The drake smiled and squeezed Darun’s shoulder at hearing the coyote using his nickname for the first time in forever. Darun couldn’t help but shiver at the feeling.

“It’s all right. Why don’t you just relax and lay back down? I’ll be right over there,” he thumbed to the desk in the corner as he continued, “if you need anything. ‘Kay?”

Darun nodded slowly and Ezaryn hopped up, returning to his desk. The coyote lay back in his bed and tried to return to sleep, to slip away into oblivion where he could escape this room, the drake in the corner, and his thoughts and feelings; his shoulder burning where Ezaryn had touched him; insides on fire unable to be doused even as he took yet another deep gulp of water; his head swimming and swirling around in his hangover; shifting uncomfortably onto his side to face the wall, away from his roommate and all of his thoughts and feelings; arms wrapped around himself, legs bent and tucked upwards, head lowered between his shoulders; the spot burned, it ached yet again, yearned; shutting his eyes and blocking it all out now; trying to will himself to go back to sleep; the sound of pencil softly scratching paper setting his teeth on edge; rustling pages fluttering against the back of his eyes and making them itch; legs shifting back and forth, paws fidgeting with one another beneath the blanket; and his shoulder, god damn his shoulder how it burned so wonderfully from that touch…

3.

Ezaryn worked silently at his desk, struggling through his assignments and trying to write some god damn iambic pentameter nonsense and began to regret taking creative writing as an elective with each syllable he scrawled out. Somehow, he managed to scribble a few lines of garbage and he shut his eyes, letting out a relieved sigh now that that was over. He yawned softly and folded his arms across his desk, laying his head down. He felt himself drifting off peacefully, edging into dozing off until he let out one sudden loud snore that caused him to jolt upright. His blushed fiercely and stood up.

“Real cool, Ezaryn…” he muttered to himself, covering his face as he walked out of the room.

Darun opened an eye, blinking a few times, roused by something just then but he wasn’t quite sure what it was. He sat forward and looked around, noticing that the drake was gone. He let out a soft, relieved sigh and rubbed his eyes.

“Oh, good, you’re awake!”

The coyote jumped at the sudden noise and jerked his head up to see the drake leaning against the door frame. Darun blinked slowly at him, his face blank, bright orange eyes glowing softly, but otherwise lacking any sort of visible emotion.

They regarded each other for a long moment, the drake studying the coyote sitting there, and the coyote returning the effort, before Ezaryn continued:

“I’m hungry. You want to grab something to eat? It’s almost four. My treat!” He held up his car keys and jingled them, flashing the coyote a toothy grin.

The coyote slipped his paw across his stomach and felt it churning. He wasn’t particularly hungry - more nauseous than anything - but he nodded anyway. Passing up free food would be foolish.

“Sure. Just need the restroom real quick.”

“Sweet! I’ll wait for you outside!” the drake exclaimed, clapping his hands and trotting off down the hallway.

Darun sighed and stood up, wobbling for a moment before he stepped out of the dorm bedroom and over into the small bathroom. He stood in front of the mirror, splashing water into his face, hanging his head over the sink. He looked at himself in the mirror, at his long, messy curly black hair and his eyes, bright and orange half-hidden behind his heavy eyelids, making him look like he was always on the verge of falling asleep or just disinterested with whatever was going on - which to be fair, both were usually true. Two large, tufted ears sprouted from his head, but they had long since stopped standing straight up and instead drooped. He just didn’t have the energy these days, that was it, that was the reason: he was just tired, that’s all. He shut his eyes and sighed, and Ezaryn flashed into his mind, the drake’s angled face and snout smiling at him, his pale golden eyes glittering. Just tired… that’s all.

“So, what are you in the mood for?” Ezaryn asked as he buckled up, looking over to Daryn.

The coyote shrugged. “Something greasy.”

Ezaryn pointed at Darun and winked, “Now you’re speaking my language!” He cranked the engine and backed out.

Darun shuddered at the wink and turned his head to stare out the passenger window. As they left campus, the trees and green fields disappeared behind tall skyscrapers and large brick buildings. The coyote leaned his head against the window and shut his eyes, sighing softly. He had begun to doze off again when he jolted suddenly, feeling something touch his arm. The fur on his shoulders and the back of his neck stood on end and he looked down, seeing the scaled hand of Ezaryn wrapped around his forearm. His heart fluttered suddenly and he felt like he was choking on air. He coughed and tugged his arm away from the drake.

“W-what?” he asked between coughs.

“You all right?”

“I’m fine.”

“You just look like you have a lot on your mind.”

“Can I smoke?”

“What?”

The coyote pulled out his pack of cigarettes and lit one up. He handed the pack across to Ezaryn who took one as well and did the same. Darun exhaled the smoke, closing his eyes as the gentle head rush washed over him and the burning sensation filled his lungs. Ezaryn hacked up one of his lungs, and laughed sheepishly at himself. Darun couldn’t help but chuckle, too, a smile forming across his muzzle for a quick moment before he seemed to realize it and wiped it off his face.

They pulled into Knott’s Diner and the drake quickly hopped out. He hurried around to the side and opened Darun’s door for him. He stepped to the side and smiled widely, his sharp teeth glittering in the afternoon sun. The coyote eyed him warily before stepping out and following him into the diner. They seated themselves at the counter and the drake turned to face the coyote.

“Order whatever you want… My treat, remember?” He smiled and slid his hand across the coyote’s shoulder.

Darun sucked in a sharp breath and looked sideways at him, the muscles in his body tensing up and hardening. He stuffed his face into the menu and sighed softly, finding the smallest bit of solace in the fact that, at least for the moment, the drake couldn’t see his burning cheeks.

Ultimately they decided on a couple burgers and fries and they ate in silence. The coyote rocked gently in his seat, thoroughly enjoying his dinner, the greasy food seeming to soothe the tumultuous storms raging in his guts leftover by the booze. Ezaryn looked at him and smiled, sighing happily as he saw the coyote finally beginning to relax a little.

The drake caught the attention of the waiter, “Uh, yes, put all this on one bill, please. Thank you!” He turned and gently elbowed the coyote, winking as he said: “Like we’re on a date!”

Darun coughed suddenly, violently, his eyes shooting open as he whirled around to face the drake. He covered his mouth as he continued to cough, his eyes wide, fur bristling, and his face flushing deeply.

“Although I guess, it’s not a very good one since I took you to this diner instead of somewhere fancy, I’d understand if you turned me down next time!” Ezaryn rest his head on his palm and smiled at the coyote.

“You’re kinda over thinking it a little, aren’t you?” the coyote grumbled as he snatched up his soda and gulped it down. He sighed and shut his eyes.

The drake laughed softly, but his shoulders drooped a little. “I - uh… yeah I guess I am, huh?” the drake said, his voice trailing off. He was quiet for a moment before he stood up. “I’m gonna step outside and get some fresh air. No rush, you go ahead and finish eating.” He stood up and stepped over to the cash register, paid, and then headed outside.

Darun watched him go, feeling both relieved and guilty. He sighed softly and looked down at his food, no longer having an appetite. His cheeks still burned, at the thought of it being a date, even as a joke, or perhaps a wish, but from whom? He took one last bite of his burger, stood up, and headed outside.

4.

Ezaryn was leaning against the side of his car facing away from the diner. His gaze looked distant, far off, as though he was a million miles away mentally. His pale golden eyes glittered as the sunlight caught in them, bounced around, and scattered itself back out into the universe.

The coyote joined him, standing to his right and remained silent. He couldn’t stop himself from admitting that this had been nice, truly it had been; something nice happening for once; the warmth and the kindness of his roommate and friend filling him and making him feel things he would rather keep locked away where they wouldn’t hurt; he shuddered and beat them back into the vault or dusty, dark corners where they belonged

When the drake noticed him, it was as though life had been breathed back into him and he spun around to face the coyote. He leaned against his car and crossed his arms, smiling.

“Feeling better?”

“Yeah, a little I guess. Thanks.”

“You ready to head back to the dorm?”

“Honestly, I don’t really feel like going back.”

Ezaryn bounced a little and slid his arm across Darun’s shoulders. “I agree!”

The coyote’s eyes shot open and he began to tremble, lowering his head. His tail started wagging and he tried to will it to stop, but it wouldn’t listen. He turned and looked at the diner, feeling like everyone was watching him and the drake. His face burned, his stomach was doing back flips and his heart was fluttering. He fiddled nervously with his paws and managed to sputter out:

“C-can we go s-somewhere else, then?”

Ezaryn leaned forward into Darun, his snout inches away from the coyote’s muzzle. Darun froze and his eyes shot open, wide with terror. He peeked to the side at the drake, who smiled at him. Ezaryn curled his arm around the coyote’s neck, pulling Darun against himself as he swept his other arm out in a wide arc.

“I know just where to go!”

What the fuck is going on!? Darun screamed into his own mind.

“Come on!”

Ezaryn and Darun got back into the drake’s car and left the diner. The drake scanned absently through the radio before landing on 80’s rock and cranking the volume up. Darun returned to leaning his head against the passenger window and shutting his eyes. He couldn’t deny that this was nice, especially with the music loud enough to drown out his thoughts and prevent any awkward small talk.

When he felt the car slow down and then finally stop, Ezaryn also shutting the radio off, the coyote sat up and groaned. He had just about managed to doze off in spite of everything. He rubbed the side of his head and looked over at the drake, who was staring at him intently. Ezaryn smiled softly and reached over, gently squeezing Darun’s shoulder.

They were sitting in a small gravel lot surrounded by tall pine and fir trees. The sounds and sights of the city had fallen away a few miles back and this was out in the country, where the grays and whites of concrete and plastic were replaced by blues and greens, hills and clear skies; where one might find an actual tree or dozen; where the houses were small and spread out instead of stacked on top of one another. Over at the edge of the gravel lot began a dirt path splitting through the trees, winding downwards into the underbrush, dark and cool in the late afternoon light.

The coyote shivered again as Ezaryn’s hand landed on his shoulder. The drake smiled softly and chuckled as he began, his voice bashful and timid:

“Down that trail over there is a small clearing next to a river… it’s a place I like to come visit… when I need some time away, to unwind or relax. I’d… I’d like to take you there and show it to you… if you’d like to come with me.”

Darun’s eyes widened just a bit and he turned to face the drake. It was so unlike Ezaryn to be quiet or shy - he was always the louder, boisterous one, the he said no pickles kind. Seeing him like this felt… weird but oddly comforting. Was he actually blushing, or were Darun’s eyes seeing things? Nevertheless, Darun couldn’t stop the small, rare smile from creeping across his muzzle as he nodded and replied:

“…Okay… I… I think I’d like that.”

“Great!” Ezaryn shouted, and immediately destroyed every thought Darun had just had about him being quiet or shy. The drake jumped out of his car and hurried around to open Darun’s door.

I can do that myself… I’m not completely helpless, Aryn, Darun thought, but shrugged and got out of the car.

He followed the drake over to the edge of the lot and looked down the path. It was exceptionally dark through there, with the thick canopy of branches above blocking most of the sunlight on the dirt and rocky path below. It looked like the entrance to some evil thing’s lair, and Darun half-expected to hear the growl or shriek of some horrifying monster from deep within, but instead only heard the gentle rustling of pine needles as they danced in the breeze.

When Ezaryn grabbed a hold of his paw and began walking, the coyote nearly jumped thirty feet into the air. He blushed fiercely and stepped back, pulling away from the drake who stopped and turned to face him, confused.

“It’s a little dim through there,” the drake began, again with that same maybe-he-is-maybe-he-isn’t blush appearing across his snout, his pale golden eyes twinkling, “but I know the way and can lead you there.”

Darun eyed him warily, ears folded against his head and tail downwards. The warmth in his hand caused him to pant softly and he swallowed hard, giving a small nod and beginning to slowly walk with Ezaryn. As they entered the path, the coolness of the dark forest drew them in and enveloped them. It smelled nice here, like childhood days hidden inside a tree house or perhaps down by the creek as each of your friends took turns jumping across, seeing who would be the one to not make it. It felt almost alien, after having spent so much time inside the city, to hear things like birds singing or trees rustling - of course Upper Portdam had birds and trees, but Darun couldn’t quite put it to words adequately, it just felt different here.

Ezaryn pushed forward, his heart beginning to thump hard in his chest. He squeezed Darun’s paw as he led the coyote onwards, over roots and under branches, down that fork and then over the small hill and… there it was.

Right next to the river, as Ezaryn had said, was a small clearing with a few picnic tables and benches set up among the shore line of the river. The small path had opened up into a large, almost dome-like shape between the trees, low branches disappearing and the ceiling of the canopy lifted itself a few dozen feet above their heads. The sun peeked through the trees and caught on the rocks and Ezaryn’s deep teal scales and scattered into a million billion rays, bouncing inside of Darun’s orange eyes as he cupped a paw over his mouth to stifle his gasp at the sight.

The drake turned to him, his pale golden eyes glowing in the dim light, a soft smile across his face, and he raised his arms in presentation.

“We’re here…”

5.

Darun sniffed and stepped over to one of the benches and sat down. He stared at the river as the water tumbled over itself, bubbling and gurgling to who knows where. Ezaryn dropped down next to him, scooting closer, forcing the coyote’s heart into a panic. Darun closed his eyes and sighed, imagining a larger void between the two of them and said softly, his voice barely above a whisper:

“Th-thanks… This is really n-nice, Aryn.”

The drake smiled and leaned against the coyote, pressing his shoulder against the other’s. “I like coming here when I need to think about something… I’ve found it helps me find the right words to say, or the right way to tackle a problem… I know I didn’t, like, discover this place, but I don’t know… I like bringing people who are special and who matter a lot to me here to share it with them.”

Darun swallowed hard, his heart pounding in his chest. He looked at the drake suddenly, his eyes wide, darting around the drake’s face, studying it and looking for the punchline or joke, or whatever this was. He leaned away from Ezaryn, his face twisting up into horror or agony at the perceived cruelty, as though Ezaryn had figured it all out, his thoughts and feelings about the drake or himself, or the both of them together.

What is going on here?

Ezaryn smiled and then suddenly looked away, his gaze faltering and landing on the ground somewhere in front of him. He huffed and shuddered before he spoke, and his voice became soft and shaky:

“I shared it with you, because you, too, are very special to me, Darun. I worry about you, with all the drinking, and I don’t want to lose you.”

“Why?” the coyote asked, his voice small, barely more than a breath. He was trembling in his seat, his paws balled into fists on his lap.

The drake sucked in a large breath and held it for a few moments, shutting his eyes as he exhaled it in a long sigh. He looked down at Darun’s lap and gently placed his hand on one of the coyote’s paws, squeezing it gently.

“Because I know that whatever is going on, it bothers you a lot, and I wish I was able to alleviate those dark thoughts or fears and make you feel better, happier… but I don’t know how, and since I don’t know how, I worry and try to be there. Cause I really, really like you and I don’t want to see you sad or suffering.”

Darun jolted and whipped his head up at the touch, his chest heaving as he began to hyperventilate, his eyes wide and terrified, footpaws wrestling with one another, and his ears folded down and hidden among his messy hair.

“And so I brought you here,” Ezaryn motioned to the clearing with a sweep of his arm, “Somewhere that’s special to me, to let you know that you, too, are special to me and I like you a lot…” the drake leaned into the coyote, pressing his shoulder against Darun’s, “A lot.”

This isn’t real… Darun thought as he began to shake, pushing himself away from the drake. He could feel his eyes begin to fill up and he shook his head in disbelief.

“I… I d-don’t…” the coyote began, pushing himself down the bench, shaking his head and clenching his teeth.

Ezaryn froze, the color draining from his face and the twinkling disappearing from his eyes. He dropped Darun’s paw and swallowed hard, looking away, suddenly feeling shame reach up out of the ground and snap around his neck and chest, forcing a shuddering sigh out of his lungs.

“I… shit… I’m sorry, Darun…” the drake began, fumbling nervously with his hands, “I… I guess I got the wrong idea completely…”

Darun looked at him in horror, his heart jackhammering itself against his ribcage, he clutched the front of his shirt and winced, stifling a sob, his orange eyes filling up and glittering in the dim light as he was unable to stop the tears from falling. He screamed inside of his own head at himself and his pathetic display of feelings, vulnerability, not just out in public like this, but also before the one guy he didn’t want to look like a stupid, pathetic bitch in front of.

Ezaryn bit his lip and he, too, began to sniff. He slid closer to Darun and wrapped his arms around the coyote tightly, resting his head against Darun’s and whispering:

“I’m sorry, Darun… I just couldn’t hold it in anymore and… I just thought… you deserved to know how I feel… I thought maybe it would help you to know that someone… that someone really cares about you and that… that I...”

The coyote pulled away, sniffling, his head hanging between his shoulders. He shook violently and looked upwards at Ezaryn from beneath his messy, ragged hair, out of breath, gasping for air; his eyes wide, glowing; paws trembling as they reached forward to grab two fist fulls of the drake’s shirt and tug himself against the drake, shoving his lips against Ezaryn’s. The drake gasped and fell backwards, hands shooting up to Darun’s head, clasping around his cheeks, fingers disappearing into his hair. He kissed the other back; the faint smell of nicotine on the coyote’s breath; gasping softly as he shut his eyes and let the moment overtake him.

When Darun broke away, he panted softly, still clutching the front of the drake’s shirt, laying on top of him. His face burned and his heart was beating so hard and fast in his chest it was nearly impossible to distinguish one individual beat from the next. He scrambled off of the drake and pushed himself away again, eyes still wide in disbelief. He opened his mouth to say something but no words would come out, and so he instead held his head in his paws and shuddered.

This can’t be real, he thought, sniffling into his paws.

The drake sat forward, wiping his mouth with his wrist and blushing deeply. He panted softly and let out a bashful chuckle, smiling at the coyote. “I uh… I never thought my first kiss would be like that…”

“Stop.”

“What?”

“Stop it, Aryn. Stop fucking with me.”

“Darun, I’m not-”

“It isn’t funny, and it isn’t fair, Aryn.”

“Darun, I’ve wanted to tell you how I felt for a while now, but every time we get some time together, you’re always wasted or blacked out!”

“You’re lying.”

“I am not lying, Darun. I go and pick you up every time you end up passed out somewhere, I bring you out to eat with me because, at least for me, it feels nice, and I get to do something nice for you and - fuck it - it feels like a date! And I brought you here. I know this place may not be god damn Amber Wings, but it’s special to me, and so are you, and I’ve felt this way about you for a few years now.”

The coyote fell silent, lowering his head and averting his gaze. It was true - he didn’t really remember every time he had blacked out, or where he had blacked out, but he did remember the inordinate amount of times he could have sworn he passed out in one place, only to wake up in his own bed in their dorm. Every time, too, that he woke up safely in his own bed, Ezaryn had always been nearby either working on something in the corner or, a few times, laying on the ground right next to him. He sniffed and wiped his nose, his heart pounding, eyes welling up again.

“You… you’re really not fuckin’ with me?”

The drake shook his head slowly, extending his hand out to the coyote. “I’m really not, Darun. It’s been eating at me, destroying me, seeing you slowly kill yourself. I couldn’t take it anymore, and I decided ‘fuck it’. I had thought that maybe you felt something too - I’ve seen you blush and get flustered when we touch.” The drake chuckled and blushed softly.

Darun gently slid his paw into Ezaryn’s hand and squeezed it. He blushed fiercely, shuddering. The drake scooted closer to him on the bench and looked down at him, smiling.

The coyote looked away, shutting his eyes. “I’m… sorry, Aryn. I just… I wasn’t expecting you of all people… It’s all a little overwhelming.”

The coyote’s mind drifted back to his home life and his family, and he shook his head before he fell too deeply into that dark hole. He drew up and lowered his head, shivering and letting out a shaky gasp, shutting his eyes tight as the memories tried to force their way into his skull. He felt something warm slip under his chin and jolted up, his gaze slowly turning towards the drake who had placed his hand on the coyote’s cheek.

“I’m sorry, Darun. I wish I had told you sooner so that you would have known and wouldn’t have spent so long wondering and being alone.” He gently pulled the coyote’s head onto his chest, curling his arm around Darun’s neck and cradling his head dearly.

“It’s… it’s okay. I guess all that matters is now we both know… Does… this mean we’re…” his voice trailed off and his face burned against the drake’s chest.

The drake chuckled softly and nuzzled into Darun’s hair, whispering softly. “I’d be honored… I love you…”

The coyote hiccuped and sniffed, wrapping his arms around the drake. “I… I love you, Aryn.”

6.

Their dorm room was quiet and dark when they arrived back home, but that was fine, that’s exactly what they wanted in that moment. They collapsed onto Darun’s bed, legs tangled together and arms wrapped around one another. At one point, the shirts came flying off and they lay, bare chest to bare chest, mouths awkwardly crashing against one another in clumsy passion.

Ezaryn hovered over Darun, his pale golden eyes glowing softly in the moonlight streaming through the window. He dove into the coyote’s neck, tongue and teeth exploring the tender flesh beneath the fluffy fur, eliciting gentle snarls and curses from Darun who wrapped his arms around the drake and held him close.

The drake slid his knee up against Darun’s crotch and left it there, pressing gently. Darun groaned and panted, letting out a soft whimper.

“Aryn, I…” he began, breathless words escaping his mouth as a gasp.

Ezaryn nibbled on his neck for a moment before lifting his head up, brushing his lips against Darun’s, his half-lidded eyes sparkling as he gazed deep into Darun’s. “Do you… want to…?”

Darun groaned softly and rocked his hips forward against the drake’s knee, biting his lip and sucking in a sharp breath. “I want you…”

The drake growled softly and sat backwards, undoing his jeans and fly, then sliding down Darun’s shorts. He blushed deeply at the sight before him, sliding backwards down the coyote’s legs, taking Darun’s clothing with him until it flew off to the side, flung away onto the floor. The coyote’s paws shot forward to cover himself, his eyes wide and suddenly terrified at his being exposed. The drake gently slid forwards once more between his legs, hovering above him and kissing him gently.

“If you’re not comfortable, Darun…”

“No… I’m just… I’ve never…”

The drake chuckled softly and kissed him again, “Me neither…”

Darun looked up at him, his breathing slowing and relaxing. He uncovered himself and brought his paws up to run upwards along the drake’s smooth chest, fingertips tracing along his scales. He blinked slowly and nodded, his excitement and terror twisting together into unbearable anticipation that pooled in his lap and spread out across his body like fire.

“…Do it… Aryn…”

Ezaryn slid downwards, nuzzling and kissing the coyote’s body as he went, down his chest, following his breastbone, across his stomach; nuzzling into the fur; breath hot against the coyote’s flesh; and there, hot and throbbing inches away from his snout, laying across the coyote’s thigh; he held it in his hand, giving it a soft squeeze. Darun whimpered and wiggled his legs, moaning out the drake’s name. Ezaryn closed his eyes and slipped it into his maw; tasting the coyote; his heart pounding, face burning, and his own throbbing achingly. The coyote bit his lip and squirmed, paws groping blindly, grabbing a hold of the bedsheets to keep himself grounded.

The drake bobbed his head slowly, tongue sliding across Darun’s flesh, teeth grazing so lightly; the coyote cursing and whimpering; bucking his hips forward against the drake’s jaws and apologizing immediately; back arched, fur bristling; crotch hot and throbbing; waves of ecstasy radiating outwards into his stomach and limbs as he bucked one final time and erupted. He covered his face in embarrassment and whined at his premature climax, but Ezaryn smiled and lifted his head away and let it slide past his lips and flop back down onto the coyote’s stomach, thin tendrils of saliva and the coyote’s cum dripping from his mouth. He panted softly and nuzzled against the coyote’s crotch, breathing in his scent, blushing deeply. He sat up and slid forwards, sliding his crotch against the coyote’s backside. He leaned over Darun and caught the coyote’s lips with his own, one hand pressed firmly to the headboard, the other sliding under the back of Darun’s knee to lift one of his legs.

“Aryn…” the coyote groaned as he felt it, hot and throbbing against his rump.

The drake kissed him again and gazed longingly into his eyes, wrestling his tongue against the coyote’s own as he reached down and pressed himself against Darun, beckoning entry. He shuddered as he felt Darun push himself downwards, the coyote’s orange eyes wide and begging. Clenching his teeth, Ezaryn thrust forward, and inside he went, inch by inch until he sat snugly against the coyote’s body. Darun squeezed his shoulders, claws digging into the drake’s scaly flesh, one hand flying up to cover his mouth as he cried out in tortuous ecstasy.

Ezaryn simply sat there for a long moment, too afraid or perhaps too inexperienced to move, simply resting and throbbing inside his friend, his lover, his new boyfriend, snuggled up to the hilt deep within him. The coyote whined and bit his lip, wiggling his body against the drake’s crotch, spurring him onward to begin rocking his hips back and forth, sliding in and out of the smaller male’s body. Darun arched his back, chest heaving with each labored breath, eyelids fluttering and toes curling as Ezaryn explored his depths, deeper and faster each time.

Darun’s head rolled from side to side, his body being thrust rhythmically into the mattress; reaching upwards and pulling Ezaryn into a long, deep kiss; biting the drake’s lower lip in sudden surprise and ecstasy when Ezaryn slammed against his sweet spot; throwing his head back and teeth dragging at the drake’s lip, drawing blood; Ezaryn growling hungrily and diving back into a kiss; hunched over, faster and harder now; bodies crashing together in passion; clumsiness slowly falling away to instinct and desire and lust; racing forth to the finish line and-

The drake arched his back and shuddered, his eyes fluttering and his teeth clenched as he bucked one final time and pumped his seed into the smaller male below him. His arms wobbled and failed at holding him upright and he fell forward, landing on the coyote, pressing him downwards into their bed.

He lay there, panting into Darun’s neck, his body trembling as each load left him and oozed out into the coyote. Darun whined, feeling it hot inside him; the sensation sending him over the edge, squirming and groaning a second time, sticking and matting the fur on his belly and Ezaryn’s scales.

Shuddering, eyes rolling upwards and fluttering, Ezaryn backed out of Darun and collapsed on his side next to the coyote. He drew Darun into his embrace, wrapping his arms around him. He curled a finger under the coyote’s chin and lifted his face up, kissing him softly, shutting his eyes and savoring the feeling and taste of his lips. Darun panted heavily, his face burning, body quivering, mind racing. He slid a paw up Ezaryn’s neck and returned his kiss, letting out a soft whimper.

Ezaryn held Darun close, rocking him gently, smiling and closing his eyes as he leaned back in bed. He could see that the coyote had begun to doze off, tired and spent, and to be honest, he was feeling pretty wiped out, himself. He rest his head against Darun’s and shut his eyes, dreaming of their future together.