Chapter 17: It's Only After We've Lost Everything That We're Free To Do Anything. -Tyler Durden

Jason sat on his bed, staring at the phone in his paw long after his call with Ethan had ended. His brother's words lingered in his mind: Everything is going to be okay. Jason wanted to believe it, but the weight of everything—the suspension, the hearing, Bryan—still felt like it was crushing him. He closed his eyes and took in and let out a deep breath, trying to focus on the one thing Ethan had said that made sense: Control what you can.

Jason focused on his breathing, slowly counting each breath as his lungs filled and emptied of air. He ran through the exercise Bryan had taught him to help calm his nerves. His memories of Bryan and Ethan's words weren't much, but they were something. They were a lifeline he could cling to when everything else felt like it was slipping through his fingers. A connection to what he had with Bryan and to his family— his pack, or at least what was left of it. Again, it wasn't much, but it would have to be enough.

The next few days passed in a blur. The sun rose and set, students went to class, laughter echoed in the hallways, and life went on. Just not for Jason. Jason's world felt frozen and gray. He barely left his room except to grab food or use the bathroom. His desk was cluttered with uneaten food on haphazardly stacked trays, their contents cold and forgotten. Dirty laundry and various other items lay scattered across his floor.

Jason spoke to Ethan a few more times over those days. The older wolf was the only person Jason spoke to. Their conversations were sporadic and often aimless. Taking place when Ethan landed in a new city or was between flights. Their chats were just enough to keep Jason grounded when his thoughts threatened to spiral out of control.

His mother hadn't called back yet, and Jason wasn't sure if that was a blessing or a curse. Maybe she needed time. Maybe she'd never call back. She hadn't reached out to Ethan after he came out. And Ethan had done so privately, just to her and Jason in their own home. Jason found it hard to imagine that she would reach out to him when he's done so much worse--- been so much more public. If anything, Jason felt that he had given her even more to stew on.

He tried not to think too much about it. Those topics were not something Jason wanted to dwell on. He feared that if he did, then he'd never be able to pull himself out of whatever hole they led him into.

Instead, Jason spent his time idly scrolling through the feeds on his phone. He wasn't looking at the screen most of the time as much as he was just fiddling with his thumbs. The bright colors and joyful pictures from social media sharply contrasted with the wolf's own mood and thoughts.

By Monday morning, Jason had moved past feeling sorry for himself. Monday night, he got past his anger. Albeit with a noise complaint from his downstairs neighbors because he'd been pacing back and forth in his room for hours. They'd described it as 'stomping'. By Tuesday morning, Jason felt more impatient than frustrated. He was tired but couldn't sleep, hungry but couldn't eat. He was going stir-crazy.

So when he received an email from the review committee late Tuesday night, he was almost happy to finally have some, any information. Jason hadn't hesitated to open it. Eager to be out of limbo by this point. He felt numb to the entire situation; nothing could surprise him anymore—or so he thought.

The email informed him that his disciplinary hearing had been scheduled for the following Monday morning. Jason let out a frustrated huff as he read the message over again. Another week? He wanted this nightmare to be over already. He was tired of waiting, unsure of what would happen next or how much worse things could get. What was he supposed to do for an entire week?

Jason tossed his phone onto the bed next to him and leaned back against the wall with a sigh. His tail curled partially around his legs as he stared up at the ceiling. The cracks in the paint seemed more noticeable now than they had before, like everything else around him was falling apart too. He shut his eyes for a moment, trying to block out the weight pressing down on his chest, but it didn't help.

What gnawed at Jason most wasn't the committee meeting or even his mother—it was the silence from Bryan. No calls, no texts. It wasn't surprising; Jason assumed Bryan had been told the same thing he had: stay away from each other. It made sense, but that didn't make it hurt any less. Jason just wanted to explain. He wanted to apologize again. He wanted a lot of things he wasn't going to get.

His gaze drifted over to the stack of food trays sitting on his desk. The smell was starting to become noticeable, and he wrinkled his nose. He'd have to take care of that soon, but right now, his body demanded sleep. Jason lay down on his bare mattress, the sheets still crumpled on the floor from days ago when he'd kicked them off in frustration. He reached over and grabbed his headphones, slipping them over his ears and turning on the power switch. The device beeped once before a feminine voice announced: "Battery low." A second later, it powered off with another beep. Jason huffed in frustration and tossed the headphones aside. It appeared sleep was yet another thing he wouldn't be getting that night.

Early Wednesday, the following morning, Jason sat at his desk. He stared at the form Mrs. Ringwood had given him. It was crumpled slightly from where he'd gripped it too tightly after their meeting. The edges were slightly bent and crinkled from his rough handling. The instructions from the assistant dean were clear: get his professors to sign off if he wanted to attend classes while on suspension. After tossing and turning the previous night, he had to do something. But was this what he should be doing?

The idea of walking into those classrooms, facing his peers, felt like climbing a mountain of glass barefoot. He ran a paw through his headfur and took a deep breath. Jason repeated Ethan's words aloud: Focus on what you can control. With a nod to himself, Jason texted Ethan his plan. He could do this. He had to do this.

Then Jason took a deep breath and reached down to grab his backpack. He hadn't been to class since the suspension started. It had only been a couple of days, but this late in the semester, those few days meant a lot. Jason knew that no matter how bad he felt, falling behind would only make things worse. That was something else Bryan had taught him.

Jason looked down at his phone as he idly read through some of his old messages with Bryan. Little reminders to read a previous chapter, or when Bryan was going to be back at their dorm room, or Jason asking if the rabbit wanted coffee. Jason shook his head to clear his mind. Then he stood up, pocketed his phone, hiked his bookbag up on his shoulder, and grabbed a stack of old food trays as he headed toward the door. After a quick detour to the dorm cafeteria to drop off the food trays, Jason stepped outside.

The sun was still rising on the horizon, casting long shadows across campus as dew glistened on the undisturbed grass. As Jason set out toward his class, he kept his head down, avoiding eye contact with the few passing students who were up and about. The campus was mostly deserted, but it wouldn't be too much longer before the early morning crowd hit the campus like a tidal wave.

Jason's first stop was his Business Analytics professor's office. Unsurprisingly, his professor wasn't in yet. Jason was over an hour early for class. He knew it would be only a matter of time, so he waited. As he did, Jason leaned against the wall next to the door, letting his backpack slide off his shoulder and onto the ground.

The wolf stared down at the faded carpet beneath him. Then he traced patterns in the paint on the wall with his eyes, trying anything to keep himself distracted from what he was about to have to talk about. If he thought too much about it, he worried he would lose his nerve. Jason's ears perked up every time footsteps echoed down the hallway around him, but every time he glanced up, it wasn't who he was waiting for.

They're staring at you. They're talking about you. The thoughts crept in unbidden into his mind as students passed by in small groups or pairs. Sometimes they glanced his way, sometimes they didn't. Jason tried telling himself it was all in his head—that they weren't whispering about him. But it felt like a losing argument.

Jason ran a paw over his face and let out a slow breath as he tried to center himself. His thoughts drifted back to Bryan again. How many hours had they spent together going over chapter assignments for this class alone? How many times had Jason found himself paying more attention to Bryan than to the course material? The way Bryan's ears twitched when he was concentrating, the way his nose scrunched slightly when he was frustrated—it had all been so distracting in the best way.

Jason was startled out of his thoughts as someone cleared their throat next to him. He flinched, realizing his professor had walked up without him even noticing. The panther, a stern-looking figure with sharp amber eyes, raised an eyebrow when Jason looked up with a somewhat tenuous and forced smile.

"Mr. Whilmeton," his professor said, the panther's voice calm but firm. "How can I help you?"

Jason straightened up quickly, fumbling as he reached into his pocket and pulled out the crumpled form Mrs. Ringwood had given him. He held it in both paws as he cleared his throat, trying to find his voice.

"I—uh—I'd like to still attend class, Professor," Jason managed, holding the form out in front of him. "I've been placed on academic suspension, but I don't want to fall behind."

His professor paused in the middle of unlocking his office door, turning to fully face Jason. His sharp gaze swept over the nervous wolf before dropping to the form in Jason's trembling paws.

"Mr. Whilmeton," the panther said slowly, his tone measured but not unkind. "I trust you understand the gravity of your suspension?"

"Yes, sir," Jason replied quietly but firmly.

The panther studied him for another moment before reaching out and taking the form from Jason's paws. He unfolded it carefully and scanned its contents before nodding slightly.

"Mrs. Ringwood has already made me aware of your situation," he said as he stepped into his office and grabbed a pen from his desk. "You may attend my lectures, but I expect you to remain focused and avoid any disruptions."

Jason nodded quickly, relief washing over him even as his nerves remained frayed. "Yes, Sir. Thank you."

The professor signed the form with precise strokes before handing it back to Jason. "See you in class, Mr. Whilmeton."

"Yes, Sir," Jason said again as he leaned down to pick up his backpack from the floor. His paws still shook slightly as he tucked the signed paper carefully into one of its front pockets.

The interaction left Jason feeling both relieved and drained as he made his way straight to the lecture hall after leaving his professor's office. It was still early when he arrived; the room was empty save for rows of desks and chairs bathed in soft morning light streaming through the few back windows. Jason chose a seat off in the corner near the back of the room, trying to make himself as inconspicuous as possible. He set his backpack down beside him and pulled out his notebook and pen, though he felt too anxious to focus on anything yet.

As other students began filtering into the room, few if any paid him any attention. It was something Jason was grateful for. When the professor entered and began the lecture, no one had said anything to him or bothered him. There was a strange sense of normalcy that settled over Jason despite everything else going on in his life.

He still felt uncomfortable. The wolf hyper-aware of every movement and sound around him, but for a brief moment, Jason allowed himself to focus on something other than his mistakes or Bryan or what lay ahead at his hearing.

Jason repeated the process with his other class with much the same outcome. The meeting was just as awkward. But luckily, his other professor was just as understanding.

As his second class came to a close, Jason found himself lingering in the lecture hall after everyone else had left. The professor had been kind enough to offer to stay and review notes from the previous lecture Jason had missed earlier in the week.

"You're welcome to stay longer if you'd like," his history professor had offered with a warm smile before they reviewed key points from the last chapter.

Jason had nodded gratefully but couldn't help wonder if the professor knew he was stalling—avoiding going back to an empty dorm room that felt more like a prison cell than a sanctuary. Eventually though, even that reprieve came to an end when the professor needed to leave for another class. Jason thanked him sincerely before gathering his things and heading out.

Jason had to catch himself from walking out of habit to the football stadium and track field. He stood on the sidewalk between buildings as other students walked past and around him. For a brief moment, he hoped that maybe he could practice with the team. Maybe he could play for a bit with the others. But then he remembered Coach's face as he stormed past Jason after the committee meeting.

That was all it took for Jason to lose his nerve and turn around. By the time Jason returned to his dorm room, he felt like he'd run a marathon. He was exhausted, more mentally than physically. He dropped his backpack on the floor and sank onto his bed, staring at the ceiling. His phone buzzed with a message from Ethan. The two had taken to texting each other throughout the day after Jason had shared his plans for the day that morning.

“How'd it go?" The older wolf asked.

Jason typed back a quick reply. “Got the signatures. Just trying to catch up now with coursework."

“You go to practice?"

Jason didn't reply back. Instead, his fingers hovered over his phone.

The lack of response didn't seem to matter as another text popped up on his screen almost immediately. “Proud of you, bro."

“Thx." Jason typed back before letting out the breath he had been holding.

A faint smile tugged at Jason's lips as he reread those words from his brother. For all their differences growing up—and all their mother's disapproval—Ethan had always been there for him when it mattered most growing up. Jason was surprised at how much he had missed that after Ethan and his mother had had their falling out. He was even more surprised that he had let her get between them.

Jason set his phone aside and debated going to the library to study. But fear held him back—the fear of running into Bryan or worse... seeing Bryan happy without him. He wasn't ready for either of those outcomes. Not yet. Instead, Jason spent his evening studying in his room, surrounded by textbooks and notes. He forced himself to go get dinner and eat it, managing only half of his meal before pushing the rest of the food around on his tray absentmindedly while solving a problem from a homework assignment.

Time passed, and later that night, Jason had almost completely caught up with his classes when a knock at his door startled him. He froze, his ears perking up as he listened for anyone out in the hallway. Jason was just about to convince himself that he had imagined the knock when it happened again—louder this time.

“Hold up, coming!" Jason called out, standing cautiously. His heart raced as he crossed the room toward the door. He hesitated for a moment, paw hovering above the doorknob. What if it's Bryan? What if it's Mom? What if? It was the most dreaded of questions.

“Damn, is he gonna keep us waiting out here all night?" Derek's voice came from the other side of the door.

Jason blinked in surprise. Derek?

“Just cool it," Mike grunted.

And Mike? What were those two doing outside his dorm room, Jason wondered.

There was another loud knock as Derek rapped his knuckles against the door again.

“Fields! You in there, buddy?" The tiger called out, louder than necessary.

Jason let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding and opened the door. Derek and Mike stood in the hallway, Derek looking slightly tense with one paw outstretched toward the door and the other shoved into his jacket pocket. Meanwhile, Mike leaned casually against the wall.

"Hey," Derek said awkwardly, quickly pulling his paw back and scratching the back of his neck.

"Uh... hey," Jason replied, unsure what to expect or say.

"Can we come in?" Mike asked.

Jason nodded and stepped aside, letting them enter. The atmosphere was tense as Mike and Derek walked past Jason. The two looked around for a moment before deciding to settle on the other bed across from Jason's. The wooden frame groaned and creaked under the combined weight of the two massive football players. Jason walked around the two and sat on his own bed facing them, his paws resting nervously on his knees.

Then the three sat in silence for a moment, each one waiting for someone else to speak first.

"So..." Derek finally began after what felt like an eternity. "What's going on?"

Jason sighed heavily, flexing and relaxing his paws. "You've probably heard by now."

"Yeah," Mike said quietly. "But we want to hear it from you."

Jason hesitated for a moment before deciding he was done lying or hiding. "I messed up," he admitted. "I let Jessica file a false sexual harassment complaint against Bryan because I was scared of what people would think if they knew how I felt about him."

Derek raised an eyebrow. "How, you, felt?"

Jason looked down at his paws, his voice barely above a whisper. "I love him."

The room went silent for a moment before Mike spoke up. "Okay."

Jason glanced up at him in surprise.

"What?" Mike shrugged. "It's not that big of a deal."

Derek shifted uncomfortably in his seat but eventually nodded. "Yeah... I mean, it's weird for me—no offense—but if that's who you are, then whatever. I guess."

Jason chuckled dryly despite himself. He wasn't really sure what to say. "Umm... thanks? I think?"

Mike smirked slightly before leaning back against the wall. “Jessica's been pissed though."

Jason's ears folded back instinctively at her name. “Yeah?"

“Oh yeah," Derek chimed in with a grin as he scooted closer to the edge of the bed he and Mike were sitting on. The tiger was eager to share the gossip. “She went full postal on your ass. Dude, I don't know if you did half the shit she's said you did but, holy shit man."

“Yeah, well," Jason grumbled, a sour taste suddenly filling his mouth, "I wouldn't put much stock in anything she says. I've learned she has a way of bending the truth."

“Don't sweat it too much. She's already moving on, and it doesn't help that she keeps changing her story every time she tells it. Still, you are numero uno on the cheer squad shit list," Mike added with a chuckle.

Derek smirked mischievously before adding, “So don't expect any tail from that group anytime soon—uh…not that you'd be into that I guess." He trailed off awkwardly as Mike shot him a warning look.

“Smooth," Mike muttered dryly.

Jason let out a bitter laugh. "Yeah, well, I wouldn't want anything to do with them anyway. Especially not after everything Jessica pulled."

Mike raised an eyebrow. "What exactly happened with her? I mean, we've heard bits and pieces, but no one seems to know the full story."

Jason hesitated for a moment, his claws lightly digging into his palms as he tried to gather his thoughts. "It's...complicated," he started slowly. "Basically, Jessica and I were dating, and it was going alright. But she always wanted more than I was willing to give. And it didn't help the first time we tried to do anything physical, she freaked...."

Derek leaned forward slightly, his curiosity piqued. "Freaked huh, damn guess you're a grower and a shower?"

Jason shook his head as he glared over at the tiger. "Really, Derek?"

Mike looked over at Derek as well.

"Do I need to start worrying about you too now?" Mike asked.

Derek rolled his eyes.

"Anyways," Jason continued," She wanted me to be this perfect boyfriend—always by her side, always agreeing with her no matter what. And at first, I thought maybe I could do it. But then..." Jason trailed off as he stared at the floor.

"But then Bryan happened," Mike finished quietly.

Jason nodded reluctantly. "Yeah. I didn't even realize it at first, but...I started looking forward to spending time with Bryan more than I did with her. And when she noticed that I was pulling away, spending more time studying with him—she got jealous."

Derek whistled low under his breath, "Hell's half no fury as a jealous cheerleader."

"It's hath no.... Hell Hath... dude. Seriously, half of what?" Mike grunted as he rolled his eyes.

Derek shrugged.

"But I mean, it wasn't just jealousy," Jason snapped before catching himself and taking a deep breath. "She started making comments—little digs about Bryan whenever she saw us together. At first, I ignored it because I didn't want to make things worse. But then one day at the coffee shop off campus..." Jason paused again as he tried to put his thoughts together.

"What happened?" Mike asked gently.

Jason's jaw tightened as he replayed the memory in his mind. "Bryan reached out—just brushed my paw—and one of Jessica's friends saw me freak out about it. She blew up at me later that day, accusing Bryan-- accusing me of being gay, hiding things from her, leading her on."

Derek frowned. "Well, I mean, that's...not a stretch."

"Yeah," Jason agreed bitterly. "But she didn't stop there. She kept pushing—kept twisting things around until somehow she convinced herself that Bryan was manipulating me or blackmailing me into spending time with him."

Mike let out a low growl of frustration. "And that's when she went to Coach?"

Jason nodded again, his ears drooping slightly. "Yeah. And instead of shutting it down like he should've, Coach ran with it because I didn't deny any of it. If anything, I made it worse."

Derek let out a long breath and leaned back against the wall again. "Man...that's messed up."

"You think?" Jason snapped before immediately regretting his tone. He sighed heavily and rubbed his temples with both paws. "Sorry...I'm just so angry at her—and at myself—for letting it get this far."

"Hey," Mike said firmly, crossing his arms over his chest. "You came clean when it mattered. That counts for something."

"Maybe," Jason muttered under his breath. "But it doesn't change what happened—or what almost happened to Bryan because of me. I should have said something earlier. Then maybe I wouldn't even be in this mess." Jason shook his head slowly, more so to himself than to Derek or Mike.

Mike grunted, "Maybe, or maybe not. Can't do anything about it now."

"What I don't understand," Derek chimed in," Is it just you getting in trouble for all this? You didn't file the false complaint, that shit was all Jessica."

"I don't care anymore, she's not worth it. I found that out the hard way. Besides, I'm done not taking responsibility for my actions. I can either point blame or I can deal with it. I'm trying to deal with it," Jason replied, feeling relieved and dejected all at the same time.

Derek cleared his throat loudly and tried to change the subject. “Yeah okay, but um well, anyway… uh… you know Steve's probably gay."

Jason frowned as he looked over at Derek and blinked in confusion. “What? Who's Steve?"

“The assistant cheer coach," Derek clarified quickly. “I heard some of the girls talking about it last week."

“Okay…not sure why that's important. I'm not gay. Well, at least — I'm not into him." Jason said slowly, still confused by where the sudden shift in the conversation was heading.

“But wait," Derek added suddenly, looking between Jason and Mike with wide eyes. “I thought you—and Bryan—were like… a thing? So like you all, it's a thing right…. Like gaydar or somethin?"

“What?" Jason said, now completely lost, “ Look, it's complicated." Jason added as he sighed heavily.

Derek looked over at Mike again for help, but the brown bear just shrugged nonchalantly.

"Not all gay guys know each other dumbass," Mike said.

“Well…" Derek smirked slightly before turning back to Jason with an exasperated expression. “Okay, look, I dunno bro… it honestly all sounds pretty gay to me."

Jason rolled his eyes but couldn't help laughing softly despite himself. The tiger meant well, and Jason knew what he was trying to get at.

“I guess it would to you. But it's not like that, okay?" Jason said.

Derek nodded before glancing over at Mike, who didn't offer any further comment. The brown bear nodded slightly and Derek's face lit up like he just remembered something important.

“Okay, wait… I gotta know one thing though, does this mean you weren checking us out in the showers?" Derek asked with mock seriousness.

“Dude! No! Fuck off!" Jason shot back, shaking his head in exasperation.

Mike chuckled and nudged Derek with his elbow. “Told ya - now pay up."

Jason raised an eyebrow as he looked between the pair.

Mike caught his look and smirked." Dickwad here said the reason you haven't been at practice is because you were afraid everyone would know you were checking them out in the showers."

“Really dude…" Jason said flatly.

“What," Derek shot back defensively," can't tell me you haven't peeked at the goods. I'm straight as hell and even I've looked a few times."

Jason rolled his eyes.

Derek grinned mischievously before holding up his paws in surrender. "Alright, alright… but seriously." His tone shifted slightly as he leaned forward again. “We've got your back, okay? Whatever happened—you're still part of the team. The guys all know that. Hell, everyone has had to deal with the fallout from an Ex before."

Jason felt a lump form in his throat as he nodded gratefully. “Is that how everyone feels?"

“Most," Mike said curtly after exchanging a glance with Derek. “There'll always be some who have a problem with it—but screw 'em."

“And don't think we're not still gonna give you shit about this," Derek added with a smirk.

“Oh yeah," Mike agreed with a grin. “Definitely still giving you shit."

Jason couldn't help but smile as he slowly shook his head at their antics.

“Now, about practice on Friday, you're coming right?" Derek asked.

Jason blinked, taken aback. "I'm suspended. I can't—"

Mike shrugged. "Why not? Just because you don't get credit for attending doesn't mean you can't run plays."

Jason hesitated. "I don't think Coach would let me…."

The statement hung in the air between the three for a few moments. Jason could even see the gears turning in Derek's head. It was slow, and probably painful for the tiger - but there was some form of processing going on up there.

Derek sighed and rubbed his chin. "I mean, Coach was pissed off Monday. He ran half the line ragged. But he was alright today." He glanced at Mike, who gave him a pointed look.

“Well, he wasn't as angry as Monday at least," Derek added.

Jason caught the exchange and frowned. "Yeah, and just imagine if I show up."

Mike cleared his throat. "Well, we go against the Stanton Dragons this weekend. Without you, they are going to wipe the floor with us."

Jason waved off the brown bear's comments and shook his head, “ You guys don't need me out there."

Derek cut him off, “ Dude! We do. We're still three down from the last game, and Martins can't do what you can do, Fields."

Jason looked up from Derek to Mike. The brown bear simply nodded along with the tiger's comments.

Jason groaned and let out a huff. “Look, I can't, guys! What about Jessica?"

“What about her?" Mike said.

Derek snorted. "Yeah, like we said earlier. Who cares. She's just pissed because she got cockblocked by a nerdy rab—." Mike elbowed him hard in the side, making Derek wince.

"Ow! Okay, bad joke," Derek said quickly. "Sorry."

Jason ran his paws through his headfur. "I don't know if I can face Coach after everything."

"You don't have to do it alone," Mike said firmly. "We'll go with you."

Jason looked between them, unsure but touched by their support. The two didn't waver as Jason stared them down. Finally, Jason was the first to break. He nodded slowly.

"Okay."

The three of them spent the next hour talking about football practice and catching up on campus gossip—normal things that made Jason feel like himself again for the first time in days. When Derek and Mike finally left, Jason sat alone in his room feeling lighter somehow—like maybe things weren't as hopeless as they'd seemed just hours ago.

That night, Jason was finally able to fall asleep without fighting his racing thoughts. He fell asleep so quickly and so soundly that when his alarm went off the next morning, Jason nearly jumped out of bed. It was Thursday. Two more professors to talk to, two more signatures to get, two more courses to catch up on. Jason stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror as he brushed his teeth, whispering to himself: You can do this.

And he did. It turned out to be even easier than he had anticipated. His professors had already been made aware of his situation, thanks to Mrs. Ringwood's proactive communication. They signed his form without hesitation, and his English professor even offered him words of encouragement.

The only moment of note came between classes when Jason froze in the hallway, his ears perking up as he caught a familiar scent. His heart raced as he desperately looked around, scanning every face in the crowd of students rushing past him. But there was no sign of any familiar faces—no small brown rabbit among them.

Jason shook his head and forced himself to move on, telling himself it was just wishful thinking.

After finishing his classes for the day, Jason returned to his dorm room and focused on catching up on his coursework. He managed to finish a few makeup assignments and felt a small sense of accomplishment as he crossed them off his list. When dinner rolled around, Jason ate alone again but made sure to return the previous day's tray when he grabbed his food from downstairs.

Later that evening, Jason even decided to hit the school gym. The repetitive movements of lifting weights and running on the treadmill helped him work through some of the tension still lingering in his body. Afterward, he showered and turned in early, feeling more prepared for what lay ahead.

Friday arrived with nervous energy buzzing through Jason's veins. He attended his classes and handed in more makeup assignments before hesitating outside the lecture hall after his last class let out. Derek and Mike didn't let him linger long. His phone buzzed almost constantly with messages hounding him about meeting them outside.

Fine, Jason had texted back before heading toward the football stadium.

Once they met up, the three of them walked into the locker room together—Jason flanked by Mike and Derek like a protective barrier against prying eyes. As they entered, the usual banter and laughter from the other players died down almost immediately. Conversations stopped mid-sentence as all heads turned toward them.

Jason felt his teammates' eyes on him as he made his way across the room toward Coach Martinez's office. His stomach churned with anxiety, but he kept moving forward. Mike and Derek stopped at the doorway while Jason stepped inside alone.

Coach Martinez sat behind his desk, flipping through a clipboard filled with notes from practice earlier that week. When he looked up and saw Jason standing there, his expression darkened immediately.

"Whilmeton," Coach Martinez said coldly, setting down the clipboard with deliberate care. "What are you doing here?"

Jason swallowed hard but didn't falter as he sat down across from the cougar. "Coach," he began steadily despite the tension thickening in the air between them, "I want to play this weekend."

Coach raised an eyebrow slowly before leaning back in his chair. "After your showing at the committee meeting? After everything that's happened? You've got some nerve."

"I know I messed up," Jason admitted, keeping eye contact despite how much it hurt to see disappointment and anger etched into Coach Martinez's face. "But I came forward because it was the right thing to do. I didn't want Bryan to pay for my mistake."

The coach studied him silently for a moment before leaning forward slightly in his chair.

"I'm not asking for forgiveness," Jason continued firmly. "I just want to help the team win this weekend."

The cougar ground his teeth, clearly thinking about what to say.

Before Coach Martinez could respond, Derek stepped into view at the doorway. "Come on, Coach," he said earnestly. "You know we need him out there."

Mike leaned in as well, nodding in agreement from behind Derek's shoulder. "Stanton Dragons are no joke—we're already short-handed as it is."

Coach Martinez glanced between them briefly before turning back to Jason with narrowed eyes. "You think one good game is going to fix everything?"

"No," Jason said without hesitation. "But it's a start."

The cougar leaned back in his chair again before smirking faintly—a smirk that sent chills down Jason's spine.

“No," Coach said flatly after a long pause that felt like an eternity. “You're benched, Whilmeton. And even if you weren't suspended, you're not going to lay a foot on my field for the rest of the season."

The room fell silent at Coach's declaration. Jason's ears twitched as he heard shuffling from his teammates who were out in the locker room. There was obviously a gathering crowd outside the office, probably straining their hearing to catch snippets of what was happening with Coach Martinez.

Jason felt Derek shift behind him uncomfortably while Mike let out an audible sigh beside him—but neither said anything immediately as Coach continued staring down at Jason like he was daring him to argue further.

Jason's jaw tightened as he stared back at Coach Martinez. He refused to back down. The cougar's smirk had faded into a scowl, his piercing eyes daring Jason to push further. Jason could feel the tension in the air, thick and suffocating, but he wasn't about to walk away—not this time.

"Coach," Jason said firmly, his voice steady despite the nerves twisting in his gut. "I know I messed up, but I've owned up to it. I've done everything you asked, and I'm here because I want to help the team win. You can't just bench me for good."

Coach leaned forward, his claws tapping rhythmically against the desk. "You think coming clean erases what you did? Think that sets a good example for the rest of the team, Whilmeton? "

"No," Jason replied quickly. "But it's a start. And I'm willing to put in the work to prove myself. You know I can."

Derek stepped closer to the desk, his tail flicking with agitation. "Come on, Coach. You know we need him out there."

Mike nodded in agreement. "The Dragons are going to tear us apart without him."

Coach's glare shifted from Jason to Derek and Mike. "You two want to keep pushing me? One more word out of either of your mouths and you can join Whilmeton on the bench for the rest of the season!"

The threat hung heavy in the air, and Jason felt a pang of guilt knowing Derek and Mike were risking their own positions for him.

"Coach," Jason said again, his voice rising slightly. "I'm not asking for special treatment. Put me through hell at practice if you want—I'll take it. But don't punish the team because of me."

Coach snarled, slamming his fist down onto the desk with enough force to make the papers on it jump. "You don't get to tell me how to run my team, Whilmeton!"

Before anyone could respond, Coach stood and stormed out of the office and into the locker room. The sound of his heavy footsteps echoed through the space as he stepped into view of the other players. The group that had gathered around the cougar's office quickly backed away, giving Coach Martinez room.

Jason quickly stood and followed, Derek and Mike close behind him. The locker room was packed with his teammates—more than Jason had expected—all of them waiting for the cougar to say something. Jason didn't know what was going to happen. His teammates' expressions ranged from determined to defiant as they stood together in silent solidarity. A few stayed back, clearly uncomfortable with the tension. And a few others viewed Jason with obvious contentment and disapproval.

Coach snarled at the group, his tail lashing behind him like an angry whip. "What is everyone standing around for?"

A few of the players mumbled under their breath, many of their heads going back and forth from Coach Martinez to Jason.

The obvious implications of the group only made Coach Martinez's face grow even angrier. "Do you ladies think this is a democracy? You think you get a say in who plays and who doesn't?"

One of the older players stepped forward—a third-year doberman whom Jason had only met in passing. "We're a team, Coach," the doberman said evenly. "And we want Jason back on the field."

A murmur of agreement rippled through the group, and Coach's eyes narrowed dangerously.

"You all want me to put him back in?" Coach growled. "Fine - then each of your asses are on the line! Each and every one of you will go through hell at practice today—and if any of you can't keep up, you're off the roster."

This brought a mixed response from the players. Some openly cursed, others glancing around nervously, with a few even trying to slink away from the larger group. Even Derek and Mike glanced back and forth between each other and Coach Martinez with a worried expression. No one doubted the cougar's threat. Coach Martinez rarely exaggerated.

Jason stepped forward before anyone else could speak. "Coach. Just put it on me. I can take it," he said firmly, meeting Coach's gaze head-on. "I'll do whatever it takes because I want to prove that I can help this team win."

Coach looked between Jason, Derek, Mike, and the rest of the players before letting out a low growl. The cougar ground his teeth again. "Fine," he spat reluctantly. "You want to play so badly, then get your ass out on the field for practice. That goes for all of you! Go! Double time!"

All of the players looked around hastily before quickly breaking up, many of them rushing to their lockers to finish getting dressed. As his teammates rushed about, Coach Martinez walked up to Jason and grabbed him by his shirt. The cougar slammed Jason up against a nearby locker, knocking the wind out of Jason's lungs.

"Listen here, boy. You want to play... fine. If you survive practice today, you can play. But you are not back on this team. Am I clear?" Coach Martinez's voice came out in a low rumbling growl.

Jason quickly nodded as he tried to maintain eye contact with the cougar. "Yes, sir."

Coach Martinez let go of Jason's shirt with a snarl before marching out of the locker room. A few players followed him out. Most ignored Jason. Some gave him a nod or thumbs up. Some gave him a snarl of their own.

That evening practice was brutal—far worse than anything Jason had ever experienced before. Coach Martinez pushed the team and him relentlessly, barking orders and demanding perfection at every turn.

Jason ran drills until his legs felt like they were on fire, tackled until his shoulders throbbed with pain, and sprinted until he thought his lungs might give out. Every time he faltered or slowed down even slightly, Coach was there with sharp words or an extra lap added to his punishment.

But Jason didn't complain—not once. He gritted his teeth and kept going, determined to prove himself not just to Coach but to his teammates as well.

Derek and Mike stuck by him through every grueling drill, their presence a constant source of encouragement even when they were too exhausted to speak.

By the time practice ended, Jason was bruised and battered but satisfied in a way he hadn't felt in weeks. He'd stood up for himself—and for Bryan—and now he was back where he belonged: on the field with his team.

Jason dragged himself back to his dorm room that evening, every muscle in his body aching from the punishing workout. He dropped his backpack onto the floor and sank onto his bed with a groan. Tremors ran through the muscles of his arms and legs. His fur was still damp from the hasty shower he had taken.

His phone buzzed beside him. It was a group message from Derek to him and Mike: Dude we survived! I can barely lift my arms bros.

Jason smiled faintly as he typed back: Barely.

Another message came through from Mike: Don't forget ice baths are your friend.

Jason chuckled softly before setting his phone aside and closing his eyes. For the first time in days, Jason felt like he was moving forward again.

Across campus, Bryan sat quietly on Dreo's couch, staring at his phone as he debated whether or not to reach out to Jason.

He hadn't made up his mind yet—but deep down, Bryan knew that sooner or later, they'd have to talk.