Learn the Colors
Some people have always thought I was fucked up. Then again, now that I think about it, I kind of am. I've done shit you've never even heard of. Looking back, there's nothing I regret, because that's no way to go through life, regretting everything you do. I care about now, and only now. Every day, I wake up and think about what kind of trouble I can get myself in, how I can put myself above everyone else, how I can finally break free of everything. I don't get up until I've thought of it...There's never been a day that I've stayed in bed. Hopefully, one day there will be, when I've finally either killed myself or fucked up too much to even wake up, that'll be it. Until then, though, I'll do things my way, and it looks like you're in for a ride to hell...I don't think we'll be coming back.
I've always been good at lying. Ever since I was little, I could lie myself out of anything. My brother probably hates me, all the shit I've pinned on him. He's got my criminal record with his name on it, it's so brilliant. That's what you get for not being able to stop. Some people would call it a disease, I call it being free. I have ADHD, I can't pay attention to any one thing for any length of time, and I can't ever stop moving. I don't have friends, I can never talk to anyone long enough to become friends. Maybe some people will say differently, but I can't remember who they are. I have memory loss. When I was little, me and my brother were doing something he said involved our bikes and a dam, but I can't remember so maybe he's just making it up. Anyway, he says that I fell off a 40-foot dam, right on top of my head. I can't remember anything about my childhood, only what my family has told me. I can barely remember my own name; I can't remember what homework assignments I had. I was probably the only fucking kid in my school to have a day-by-day planner.
*At this point, he wanders off, his ADHD bringing him to find new things...for now. He comes back about half an hour later*
I just realized that I've was talking to you for a while, but you still don't know my name, or anything about me. I'm a black lizard, about 5' 11" with white-blonde hair. I'm 18 years old, my birthday was last week. My mom's always getting after me about letting my hair fall in front of my face, there's always one lock covering my left eye. I've got a slight limp in my right leg because of a stunt I pulled off in my freshman year at high school. My family calls it an accident, I say stunt because it went off perfectly, I only misjudged the distance between the third floor and the ground. Think what you will, I can't remember enough about it to tell you, I've got chronic memory loss.
Hmm, anyway, yea, I grew up in a nice part of town, nice family, nice house, I had a pet bird once, but I set it free. It came back once, a year later. All in all, I'm a pretty nice guy; nothing really went wrong with me and my family, I did all my shit on my own. I'd say I'm lucky to have made it this far, but I don't believe in luck. Oh, fuck, my name...My name is Jeremy, or Jemmy, if you're my little sister, but you're not, so you can call me Jem. Yea, that's me, not much to it, but my story, well, that's a bit different.
I won't start with the beginning, I can't. I think that's the only thing that really gets to me; I can't tell anyone how I started out. It's a bit unnerving, really. Still, I can tell you about the stuff I do in high school, which, now that I think about it, is pretty much when it all started happening. I go to Michael Carver's Institute, a big prep school, not really my type of place, but that's where my parents paid to send me, so I'm thinking I could do them a little favor and go. It's a gigantic school, 5,000 people, three floors, over 300 rooms, counting the custodial closets and maintenance rooms. There's more than enough room, but I always feel suffocated by the place, nowhere near enough action for me. Oh, I do pretty well grade-wise, enough to get me into a decent college and start me off, but I never could get into the academic stuff, I was more of a sports person. But here's the catch: I never played football or any of that normal stuff. I made up my stuff, it was brutal. Often, I and whoever I could get to play would come home bloodied up, with bruises and stuff; it's the best time of my life. That's another thing about me. If there's pain, I'm there. I love pain, not in a depressed kind of way, I just love the way it can make you stronger. I truly believe in that old saying, 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.' It's completely true. Anyway, when sports just didn't do it, I started getting into some other stuff, drugs and women and such, but to tell the truth, the drugs just weren't all that great. Oh sure, it felt wonderful for a time, but when it wore off, you were just bored again. Still, though, my walls at home are covered in Sharpie, stuff that I've written while I was fucked up. There's some pretty amazing shit there, I'll tell you that. The women, though. Ah, if there's one thing I'd love to redo in my life, it would be all the women. God, females are great. Not just for sex, oh no, I made that mistake once; I still have the scars from that. Three, under my eye. No, women in general are wonderful beings. They're smart; don't forget that, they never stop thinking. They could be in the throes of orgasm, and still be thinking about how they could save money and such, it's amazing. Still, apart from the intellectual aspects, they do have wonderful bodies. So soft...cuddly, even, that's the first time I've used that word in a long time. Ah, but I've digressed.
High school...damn, there's not much else to say, so I'll just cut to the chase, what this whole thing is gonna be about. Pretty much, life has been fairly nice to me. I haven't gotten into a whole lot of trouble, though that's partly my doing. However, there will always be one thing that I will never be able to get over. You see, I've been telling you about all this, everything I've done. Well, I mean, it was fun, but I never really got to sit back and look at what I did. It's not that I didn't have time or anything. No, it was a lot more basic than that. You see, I don't see. All this time, I've been doing all this, but I couldn't see it. My story is about life, it's about struggling, yes, but it's a happy one, as far as I can tell. That's good, though, because the world needs more happy stories. That clichéd 'troubled past' is getting old; I've heard enough of it. So, you want to hear my story? Well, I've been blind since I was born, so I won't be able to tell you everything, no, but I'll try my best. I don't have the time or the attention span to tell you the whole thing, though, that'd take way too long. Instead, I'll just tell you a story, one from the beginning of my senior year, only a few months ago. It was almost halfway through, I had been visiting colleges and such, and I found that it's a lot more expensive for a blind person to get a college degree than it is for a seeing person. I was really looking into this one girl, I'll tell you about her later, but I just had this problem with getting to know her. I guess I just didn't think that she'd take to me too well. I really have no idea what I look like, just what people tell me, so that had something to do with it, but it was more than that. I knew I was more than a little odd, I knew that I could be downright scary with all that I do, so...well, I'll just tell you, and we'll see...
*He gets up to get a glass of water, decidedly not holding out his hands to find his way about. Instead, he walked very slowly, taking firm, deliberate steps. He gets the drink, and promptly forgets to come back, finally returning another half an hour later*
The first thing I know is the heat. Beating down on my back, it's relentless, there're just no breaks from it. I'm making my way to school, walking along the same familiar paths. I've done this walk a thousand times...actually, it's only 623, but either way, I know how it goes. Now, some people might wonder exactly how I'm doing this, what with being blind and all. Well, when you put all my problems and fuck-ups together, you get a pretty messed up dude. Today, on a whim, I decide that I'm going to walk to school. I tell my mom, and she laughs, telling me to get in the car. I tell my dad, and he tells me to get off whatever I was on, although jokingly, at least. So, of course, I pack up my things and walk out the door, taking extra care not to trip over anything on my way out, which would significantly diminish the occasion. I make it about four hundred feet before realizing that I'm thoroughly lost, but my stubbornness keeps me going, until I finally hear a familiar sound, a creek that runs next to the road to my school for a ways, and then moves away from it in an abrupt turn. I follow the stream until I could tell that it was leaving, and then I just stay on the pavement until I can hear the familiar school noises. I hear my name being yelled almost as soon as I come within a few hundred feet, and then I hear and felt people running up to me.
"Jem! What the fuck are you doing? How'd you get here?" I smile and turn my head towards the voice. I know that it's really unnerving when I do that, because, of course, I can never look them in the eyes, but it's just a natural reaction, and I haven't done anything about it.
"I walked." I say, matter-of-factly. It was true, I had no idea what I had been doing, but I had done it, nonetheless, and it had worked.
Almost immediately, the voices around me intensify in volume, making me smile again, staring off into a general direction. I cock my head towards one voice, one I could actually remember and recognize. I have no idea why, but it's always been there. Okay, so, when I told you that I didn't have any friends, I lied. There is this one girl, a husky, who I've always known, and have never forgotten. I have no idea what she looks like, but people tell me that she's way out of my league, which is funny, considering that we've gone out on several occasions. Her name is Rachel, and she has the most beautiful voice that I've ever heard.
"Well, how'd a blind kid like you manage a feat like that?" I smile, turning around. The whole place falls silent as she says that, but she is the only one I can take being teased about my blindness from.
"I'm blind, not deaf. You all know what sound shoes on pavement makes, I followed the road." I hold out my hand, smiling again when I feel her take it. The crowd starts to disperse, until only a few people are still there. Again, she speaks, her voice washing over me like liquid gold.
"That's pretty impressive. Just how do you plan on topping that?" She laughs, squeezing my hand a little. I shrug, trying my very best to look her in the eyes.
"Let's see...topping that...Well, I suppose I could do it by asking you out. Maybe we could go get dinner together tonight?"
She laughs again, giving me a hug, "I'd love to. Would you like me to pick you up, then?"
I laugh along, "That'd be nice. Something tells me that I won't be driving."
In the distance, I hear the school bell ring, and we set off towards class. Rachel keeps trying to steer me about, no matter how many times I tell her that I'd walked this campus thousands of times before. Truth be told, I was grateful for her company, it had been a while since I'd hung out with anyone, let alone someone who had agreed to dinner.
"Hey, Jeremy...um...what's...erm...what's it like to be blind?" She is obviously uncomfortable, but even more obviously curious.
I stop, looking around, wondering where to begin. Inspiration chose to strike me, there, thankfully, as I could think of nothing to say. I turn to her, holding both of her hands.
"Look into my eyes...if you didn't know already, could you tell that I was blind?"
She makes a noise; I can feel her breath as she stares close into my eyes, looking for a sign. Finally, she admits defeat.
"Ugh...no, I can't tell anything. What am I missing?" She asks, to which I smile again, ducking down quickly and giving her a kiss on her cheek. She's a bit taken aback, I can tell, bringing up a hand to touch the spot, but she likes it, because she kisses me back, hitting a little harder, though, and going right for my lips for a quick kiss. I smile again.
"You didn't miss anything, there's nothing there. Being blind is just like being normal. I can read, draw, I can do everything you can do."
She moves closer, her body brushing up against mine, fur feeling very good against my scales. She listens intently.
"Hmmm...I really can't think of anything that sets us apart, you and I. I'm just the same; I just can't see, that's all."
She smiles, finally stepping into my chest, rubbing up under my chin. I hug her.
"That was very romantic, y'know? I'm looking forward to dinner already."
I smile again, "So am I, but class is starting in two minutes, and I'd rather not have to wait if either of us gets a detention. And your 1st period is upstairs, too."
She gasped, "How do you know all of that?" She looks around seeing no clocks, even if I could see them.
I shrugged, "Counting seconds, and I have a friend in the office...I'm not magic, you know." With that, I kiss her goodbye and move off to my class, maneuvering through the hallways, as I have done countless times, and walking straight into the room and to my desk. I still don't think some of my teachers have caught on that I'm blind, even with all my books in Braille. I laugh a little, and then felt a strong, furry hand on my shoulder. I'm about to turn around and inquire as to who it is, when the hand gives me a good, hard shove, sending my books all over the floor and me forward, jabbing the desk into my stomach. I don't even make a sound, but I turn around rather quickly after that.
"Who are you, and what was that for?" I demand, but am only met with a few laughs.
"Well, if it isn't the blind kid. Ya know some people are talking about how you're magic, how you know things no blind kid should know. I just wanted to make sure that that wasn't true. I've done that, but I think I'll go ahead and humiliate you some more, considering as you've got no idea who I am."
I bristle. As I said, Rachel is the only one I'd ever let call me blind, "I guarantee you, I'm magic when I need to be. If I were you, I'd just sit down, and leave the blind kid alone, before I did anything stupid."
The paw returns, shoving my shoulder again. I stand up, and so does he, his clothes rustling, which, unbeknownst to him, help me to pinpoint his exact location, along with where all of his limbs are.
"Stupid...like this?" He asks, and I hear the snap of his shirt as his fist flies up, aiming for my face. I move my head sideways, lashing out with my own hand, striking him in the ribs before grabbing his extended arm, twisting it behind his back, and throwing him into the wall.
"Yea," I snarl, "stupid like that." I twist his arm mercilessly, listening as his buddies fly up out of their seats. I hear the bright sound of a knife leaving its sheath, and I know that maybe this isn't the crowd to be messing with. I let go, stepping back and putting my hands up in the air.
"Put the knife away, I was just defending myself. I didn't hurt him, and it was his choice to bother me in the first place. Maybe you all will think twice before messing with a handicapped kid again. You never know what kind of tricks we've got up our sleeves." I flick my arm, and my knife comes sliding out of its own leather sheath, flying into my hand.
"Just like magic, huh?" I growl. I hear them back down, and turn around, slipping the knife back into my shirt sleeve, where the shoulder strap keeps it out of view, but just in reach for a case like that one.
"Thank you. Now, just let me pick up my books, and I'll move." I kneel to gather up my stuff, then stand back up, sensing a presence behind me. I turn.
"Who is it this time?" I roll my eyes, something that's very unnerving for everyone. A voice pipes up; this one is of my teacher.
"I would greatly appreciate it, Mr. Foureau, if you could please sit down. Unlike you, I rather lack the ability to captivate an audience, and so I require complete attention during my lectures. Now, if you please, your desk, Mr. Foureau."
I sit down, gathering my things together and finding my English book. Cracking it open, my fingers stray across the pages, recognizing the little bumps. It really is an amazing invention, Louis really outdid himself. I sit there, eyes closed, following along just as everyone else is. Notes...well, they are quite out of my league, writing is rather difficult for me. An hour passes by; my fingers are just about tired of constantly sliding over tiny indentations, and finally, the bell rings. First period is over, done with, and I'm one of the first ones out of the door. As I head out towards my second class, people seem to get out of my way. It really was rather pleasing, I'd much rather not run into anybody.
However, someone has the intention of doing just that. A furry someone, a female someone, someone who rubs up against me, laughing, "Where're you off to so quickly? You know, juniors have got that damned testing today; we get the rest of the day off. Whaddaya say we head over to my place?"
My eyes are still dead, but my thoughts sure light up. I had completely forgotten about the testing days, "Now there's a plan if I ever heard one. Perchance the fair princess shalt lead the way to her carriage?" I drop into some of the language I had just read.
She laughs, "Only if mine noble knight shalt escort me. What sayest, thou, wilt thou not accompany a fair princess?" She, apparently, had been reading up as well. I hold out my arm for her, and she marches us off, out into the parking lot to her car. I slide in, relishing the warm plush seat covers. They're almost as good as her fur. She gets in, too, sliding the keys into the ignition and starting the car, "I still don't understand why my parents get these tiny foreign cars, but I still have to drive this hulking thing. Damnit, I need gas again!"
I reach into my back pocket, pulling out my wallet, "Since you're taking me around, I'll pay for gas. And no, disputing me won't do any good, so don't even try it." I take out a credit card, only knowing it's the right one by the raised logo in the corner. Her jacket rustles as she shakes her head, "You're too perfect, you know that? We're gonna go have some fun over at my house; my parents aren't home, so we can do whatever."
I smile, leaning over and kissing her neck. She murrs, turning her head so her lips meet mine. I reach behind her head, stroking the back of her neck. Giggling, she sits back in her seat, shifting the car into gear and driving off as I still assault her neck with my mouth. After many a minute, I too sit back, but I only move my hand far enough to grasp one of hers, pulling it off the steering wheel and holding it. I hear the exhalation of breath that is typical of a smile.
She brings my hand up and rubs her muzzle on it, kissing it, "You are one of the nicest people I've ever met. How can you do it, being blind, but still be the one who never minds if anything bad happens, and you always make it better?"
I shake my head, "Who says I don't mind bad events? They affect me more than anyone knows, except you. No, I mind them; I just like to look on the brighter side. It's the only way I've got, or else I would have started feeling sorry for myself a long, long time ago."
She leans over the space between the seats to kiss my cheek, and I smile once again. I feel the car slowing down, remember all the turns we have taken, and realize that we are in the driveway to her house.
She turns the car off and sits back, sighing, "Jem...I...I just don't know about things anymore. Ever since Mom caught Dad with all that money no one knows where came from, things have been really fucked up here. I..." Her voice had been breaking the whole time, but now she simply just could not continue, and she started to cry. She practically leapt into me, her seatbelt sliding off and banging against the window as she sits in my lap, burying her face in my chest and crying her eyes out, her shoulders shaking furiously.
I pet her, kissing her neck and rubbing her back, "Shhh....Hush now, it'll be okay. I'm here, and I'm gonna make sure that nothing happens to you. Calm down, now, everything's gonna be fine. Let's go inside, get you something to drink. Then we can go talk, if you still want to." I open the car door, wrapping my arms around her and picking her up. She clings to me, muzzle still buried in my neck as I make my way to the front door. Thankfully, it's unlocked, and I make it inside. I walk to the kitchen, listening as the sound of my shoes on the carpet changes to the sound of the wood floor of the dining room, and then to the tile of the kitchen. I guess as to where the glasses are, get it right, and fill one up with water, and all the while Rachel is still holding on to me. I give her the water, supporting her now with my hands.
She takes the glass, drinking deeply before dropping the empty cup back onto the counter, wrapping her arms around me again and nuzzling into my chest, "Thank you." She shifts a little, and I start to move back towards the living room, finding the couch and lying down, gently laying my cargo down on top of me, "It's okay, Rachel, it's okay."
I can tell that she's nervous, just a little uncomfortable with the closeness between us. I've got to admit, I hadn't thought that I'd be this close to her when I woke up this morning. Still, it feels good, quite a bit better than I've felt in a long time. I give her a little squeeze, and that seemed to break the tension. She murrs and sits up, straddling my waist. My hands rub her sides, resting on her legs after a while. She leans over and buries her muzzle in my neck, heaving a huge sigh. I rub my own muzzle against her cheek, whispering comforting words into her ear. She whimpers a little, I feel her face muscles contract as she shuts her eyes tightly, pressing close against me.
She turns her head, talking into the back of my black-scaled neck, "Jem...I...I think I love you. Is...is that okay?" She cringes, her whole body shying away. I trace my right hand over her back, claws making little furrows in her fur, "Of course it is. Anything is okay for you, I promise." I smile, wrapping my left arm over her back, as my right still continues its journey over her shoulders, feeling the firm muscles and delicate curvature underneath her skin.
"Even if...even if I wanted...to have sex with you?" The words hit me like a freight train; I never thought anyone could think of me like that, I was always the cripple, the one who still relied on his parents to get him around, the one who couldn't do anything for himself. At that moment, I feel closer to Rachel than I have ever felt closer to anyone in my life. I nod, pulling her warm body closer to mine, "Yes. Even if you wanted to have sex with me, I'm still your friend, and I still love you."
She smiles a little, "Jeremy. You're an amazing person, you know that? I mean...there's no one else like you. You're-" I push her up by her arms, nuzzling against her cheek, then putting a finger up against her lips, "Shhh. You don't have to say that, it's...not all of it is true...I've got my flaws, we all do, I just choose to wear them like they're supposed to be worn: as character."
Her eyes are half-closed, listening quietly. She nods, affirming my thoughts, "Jeremy, it's...let's go, to my bedroom, now." She clambers off of me, pulling me with her. I give a yelp, tripping over the rug, regaining my balance, still going at top speeds towards the one place I'd never thought I'd be tonight, "Rachel, wait! We shouldn't be doing this, your parents..."
"Aren't home, and even if they were, they love you, they can't get enough of you, it's fine. My father wants me to marry you, my mother can't stop talking to me about you, I'm just speeding up the inevitable. And...Jeremy, I can't keep my hands off you any longer."
She stops short, I'm not expecting it, and I crash into her. It's okay, though, she hits the door with a tiny 'oomph' that's half-disguising a moan of pleasure, and then her hands are all over me, and her muzzle is clamped against mine. Our tongues fence back and forth, slithering over each other. I run my hands down her back, squeezing her rear, then twisting my wrist and finding the doorknob, opening the door. We fall back into the room, she pushes me up against the nearest wall, and our molestation of each other continues. Her hands slide under my shirt, claws raking over my scaly chest softly. She makes soft moaning noises as my own hands travel down, sliding down her back and into her shorts, squeezing and kneading the soft flesh of her rump. Our mouths are still firmly fastened together. She wriggles against me, rubbing lewdly against my crotch. My hands slide out and, in the passion of the moment, my claws slice through her shirt, ripping it off of her shoulders. I can sense her surprise, but it quickly melts into lust. She humps against my leg, rubbing herself up and down over my jeans, still making her soft noises. I smile as I feel her hands running down my front, stopping at the hem of my shirt before grabbing on and pulling the garment over my head. Slipping my arms out of it, I pull her closer, relishing her warm fur, not to mention the feeling of her naked breasts pressed against my chest.
"Jem...I love you." She says, nuzzling up against my chin, wrapping her arms around me. I reciprocate the motion, sliding my chin onto her shoulder and whispering 'I love you' into her ear. She gives a happy sigh, her hands beginning to work across my back, massaging my scales. Eventually, they drop lower, playing with my belt, her claws clinking across the metal studs. I nod into her neck, my tongue flicking out against her soft flesh.
"If you want it," I say, "you can just unbuckle that, and I'll show you how much I love you."
Her hands shake as she fumbles with the buckle. Finally, it comes free, and the loose pants slide down my legs. I tilt her chin into another kiss, feeling her tongue slide across mine. Her thumbs hook into my boxers, pushing them down with my pants. Slowly, I step out of them, bringing us that much closer to the bed. She must look so cute, pressing up against me like that, I can almost see her. Unable to take it any longer, she gives a playful growl and shoves me backwards onto the bed, climbing up on top of my chest. I continue the game and growl back, nipping at her arms. She leans over, hair cascading onto my chest, and her lips brush mine. I lean forward to complete the kiss, but she has retracted, leaving me hanging. She rolls off of me, giggling a little as I sit up and cock my head towards her.
"You little tease, come back here!" I whisper, reaching out. Her hand touches mine, then grasps it, pulling me closer. Quickly, she moves in front of me, and then stands up on her knees, grinding her back into my chest. With a shudder from us both, her dripping sex brushes over my now rock-hard cock.
I started to feel uncomfortable, "Okay...now I'm getting second thoughts...are you sure you want to do this?"
She squeezes my hand, whispering, "Yes, of course. Now, stop talking and give me the time of my life, loverboy." God, I love it when she acts like this.
I bite her neck, a little harder than a nip, a love-bite, and begin to push her down, bending her at her waist. She's now on her hands and knees in front of me, pushing back against my crotch. We're not even waiting anymore; we just plunge right into it. I growl, leaning back and letting my member slide against her dripping slit, positioning itself for the plunge. Then, with one solid push, I'm inside her, breaking past her barriers and hilting myself with one quick move. She grunts, crying out a little and shaking softly. I lean over, my front flush with her back. Licking her neck, I cup one of her breasts in my hand, kneading it. Quickly, her pain passes, and she's moaning again, grinding her body back against me. Nipping her neck again, I begin to thrust forward, and then pull out, only to shove into her again. God, she's tight, squeezing me and milking me for all I'm worth. Her hand moves back and grasps my rear, pulling forward with my thrusts. I oblige, pushing harder, my hips slamming into hers. Her voice rises in both volume and pitch. My own world, something which I've never seen, is suddenly vibrant and full, feeling passing for seeing in the moment. Things whirl in my dead eyes, and I cannot name them. The word 'color' passes through my brain, but is quickly gone again, as I redouble my efforts. My free hand move down, teasing her slit as I pound into it, rubbing over the soft bumps and nubs down there. For some insane reason, I suddenly wish she was wearing a collar, so I could pull her back against me for every time I shoot forward. But even without it, it's good. Finally, I feel that sensation, that burning in your chest, and I know it's almost done. The feeling spreads to all my limbs, I know it has to be happening to her as well, she's practically screaming, her voice muffled a bit by the sheets I can tell she's biting. I pull her up, so we once again are in the position in which we started, and hilt one last time, before my seed begins to bury itself in her, coating her insides as I make the star-studded finish. With one last cry of ecstasy, she's gone, and her juices flow down between our legs and soak the sheets underneath us. Both my hands are at her breasts, kneading and pinching and rubbing softly, and my mouth is again at her neck, nipping and licking and kissing. Her arm travels up, draping itself over the back of my neck, and I feel at one with her, like we're one person, and I know that I'll never be able to feel this again, no matter how long I live. Our breathing is heavy, practically matched in tempo. I can feel her heartbeat even over my own, thumping into my chest. She slowly pushes back, and we fall back onto her bead, my head hitting the pillows, hers on my chest. Finally, words find her.
"Jeremy...God, that was amazing." She's out of breath, her voice is barely there.
I smile, "I know, but...there was something, something I wanted to ask you about."
She turns her head, I feel it against my chest, and I can tell she's staring at me, "What's that, love?"
I try to remember what those feelings, those visions I had were, "I...I saw something...I guess it was in my head, but...it looked real to me. They were these...things...flying around. They were like...I don't know how to describe it. They all looked different but...it was like, you could see a few of them inside each other, like some were made up of others. I don't know...They were...they looked natural, like something that's out there. A couple of them looked soft, one was so soft that it just...wasn't there, almost. But others were harder, like...one was so hard, it was...it was like it wasn't there, either, but it was the complete opposite of the softest one. I...I really can't describe them."
I can tell she has no idea what I'm talking about, the way she lays still, and I can feel her eyes burning into me. I feel like an idiot. Then, finally, she shifts. She's thinking...
She gasps, "Jeremy...those are colors!"
I look at her questioningly, "Colors? Like...red, blue, green, like in the crayons and markers and stuff?"
She nods frantically. She knows how useless they are to me, I've told her again and again, laughing as she tries to point something out to me with 'it's red' or 'it's green.'
She squirms into me, and traces of pleasure rub through my skin, "Yea, Jeremy...like them. The hard one...that's white, it's like...you know, your first memory of something good. Like...you're lying with your mother when you're really small. You just had a bad dream, and she's taking care of you, making everything bad go away, it's like that. Then...the soft one, the one that was barely there, that one's black, the color of your scales. Black is like...it's like the bad dream you had. Something's chasing you, it's nighttime, you can't see where you're running to, you look behind you and bam, this monster's attacking you. That's black, except for you. In your case, black is...it's gentle, the most gentle of all the colors. It's knowing, and it's nice..." She giggles, rubbing into me some more, "And it's the damned best fuck a girl could ask for, loverboy."
I laugh, wrapping my arms around her and cuddling her naked body close to mine, "So...those are colors..."
She nods, turning her head and kissing my arm softly, "Mmhmm, love, those are colors. Learn them, and then...maybe being blind won't be so bad after all."
She rubs into me one last time, squirming about a tiny bit, and then sighs a deep sigh, melting into my arms. Soon, I can hear her soft breathing become even softer, and her hand goes limp in mine. She's asleep.
Slowly, my eyes begin to droop closed, and then, I'm asleep. It's a good dream, the one I have. I know this because, well, everything's white.