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Beast

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Written by Arian Mabe (Amethyst Mare)

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Hush now. I didn't ask you to talk. I'm sure you've done more than enough talking in your time. You forgot to listen.

No...

No.

That's a lie. You never forgot. You just didn't care.

Not about you, was it?

Shut up. The only thing I want to hear from you now is your screams.

Gone, you say? That I'm fucked up, you say? Well, dearest sweetheart darling of mine... You had a hand in this. This is the monster, the beast from the crypt. You like?

Of course not. It's not what was wanted. The beast is no longer controlled and, oh, how she's out of her cage now.

Quiet. It's just a knife. I haven't even pressed in yet.

Because it felt like a blade slicing into me every time you screamed at me, every time you overpowered me, every time you stole a part of me, tearing and ripping, my blood spilling, until there was very little left of me at all.

Is that what you wanted? Was it fun for you? A game for you?

Oh, how you know not the path you've trodden... You see, this is just my permission, cunt. My permission to sin. Everyone expects me to be shit. Everyone expects me to be lesser. So, why not put on a show?

Did you not expect to be centre stage for it? You always liked that so much though...

Just a taste. A drop of blood. It's sweeter off the blade for it being yours. Because too much blood of mine was spilt for you, the blade slicing, my claws raking. Over my own skin and flesh, of course. I couldn't take it, I needed it, I needed something outside to take me away from the pain inside. You know what I mean?

Oh, what the fuck would you know... You don't fucking care for any of this. But, frankly, this is where you are now. This is it. This is your grand finale, the end of the end, though you were never the best of the best. You are the bottom of the barrel, saving the worst for last, no pedestal for you to tower above them all.

How does it feel to be on the bottom? How does it feel to taste dirt in your mouth? Your blood trickling into your eyes... Oh, that one will bleed a lot, don't worry. There are many more to come.

You'll never stand again. You'll never harm anyone ever again. For I'm here to strip you of your power, to cut you down to the ground.

No more for you. No more. This was never for you.

Jaws. A lashing tail. The beast awakes. It roars inside me, looming, growing, snarling. It howls and bays for blood, clamouring to be released, and I can only allow it - for I've spent so many years locking such a beast away. Why not, at long last, let it out to play?

Teeth sinking into flesh, ripping, tearing. Just like you did to me, cutting me down, rolling over and over, the darkness a friend only to nightmares. Screaming and clawing, fighting pain inside with pain outside, blood dripping. Only, this time, it's not my own.

Oh, don't whimper so. I'd rather hear a scream. I'd rather see you split open, your ribcage cracked and splayed to reveal the shrivelled, frozen mass of a heart, just barely beaten.

It's time to go. Let no one know. It's time to go.

A body may be broken but it's the mind that should be shredded, ripped up into tiny little pieces. The beast snarls and rends and cuts through it all. It needs to feed, having been ravenous for so long - and yet there's only one thing that it could possibly feast on. That's the only reason for my past, these memories, the horror of all that passed but...hung on.

Tear it away, take it away. The beast is relentless, tail cracking, hurling you down, devouring. The screams fade, darling, but I'll cherish the memory of them forever.

Lick the blood from the knife. A little cut. But this one is not deliberate. I just could not resist the relief of letting it all go.

Cut it out, rip it free. Bit by bit. It all has to go. For as the beast feasts it's something inside that breaks free - me, not you. You don't deserve my attention, not through those broken moans, the dying moans, the fading moans of one that does not ever have to exist ever again.

Go now. I'm free. I don't care what happens to you.

Lighter and lighter as if I'm the one losing muscle mass, my guts pulled out, swallowed and gulped down with relish. Yet I have everything of myself while you lose everything of you, power clawed at, shrivelled like the wreck of your heart. I would wonder if it was always like that but I don't care anymore. All I care about is the end of you.

Power gone. Pride stripped. Manipulation smothered. It's all to go, all gone, slipping, fading, drifting - off where it could never hurt anyone ever again. And that's all we want, everything we could hope for, chest heaving in a high that is lost in the moment, panting for the past even as the bloody entrails of it are sliced free.

Sometimes, letting go is brutal. You wouldn't understand that.

Let it go, leave it now. Oh, the remnants of you are there as the beast slavers and feasts, ensuring there is no trace left, but that is his purpose too. They need it and I would not stand in the way of what howled in the back of my mind for so many years. They were only ever trying to help me see the end of you.

And who can really blame them for that?

Revenge, you could say. But my revenge is in living each and every day with passion and joy, taking back what was stolen, claiming it, embodying it. And all of that without you were.

Step by step... We abolish your power.

It was never yours to begin with.