A Spare in the Trunk: Part XII

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#12 of A Spare in the Trunk

Allison and Lys finally meet. Worlds (and rears) collide. Or at least Jack gets a shock in the end.

This chapter became something of a millstone around my neck due to being stuck with it for so long due to illness and just painting myself into a corner. I hope I managed to do it justice. Enjoy.


"Jesus, Al. You really came all the way over here just to tell me that?" He knew her better than that, she wasn't the kind of person to rather sun go down on her anger, she brought it to his doorstep instead. He stuck his head out into the muggy night air glancing left and right to make sure no one else was taking a vested interest in the conversation. "Couldn't this have waited until tomorrow?"

"No. I have to work tomorrow and after this I'm done." Al folded her arms, looking at him expectantly. "Well? You gonna let me in or what?"

"You want me to let you in so you can tell me off some more? Earlier you were acting like I was a psycho. I think I got a spare meat hook left in the kitchen for you to sit on."

Al brushed past him striding in while trying to maintain her angry demeanor, but her eyes said he'd hurt her earlier. She pursed her lips and shook her head. "I've tried to be understanding. I tried to help you because you're my friend. No, my best friend and I actually care about what happens to you." She sounded like a guilty parent with a disobedient child. A role Jack let her play far too often with no protest. She shuffled back and forth eyeing him up and down, shaking her head again. "But this is just too much."

"What?" Jack slammed the door, rattling the frame. "What is too much? Quitting smoking? Being honest?"

"How the hell did you end up like this?"

"You already know as much as you like to remind me so let me just go ahead and save you the trouble. College crush, expensive ring, stupid kid who should have known better. There, you happy? Can I go to bed now?"

Allison let one hand rest on her hip while the other gestured about. "There you go again, making it sound like I'm a bitch."

"I want it made clear that _you_said that, I didn't. Besides, I'm not the one who keeps bringing this up."

"So, I am a bitch."

He rolled his eyes and sighed as loud as possible. Moments like these made him feel like he'd secretly been engaged to her the whole time, a quarrelsome couple finding anything and everything to fight about. It made him glad they both had enough sense to know it'd have never worked out. "Could have sworn I wasn't the one who said that. I'm over it."

Al tried to look as if she were brushing at her hair, but he could see her wiping her eyes. "If only that were true."

"It is true," he said loudly. "Why are you so hung up on this?"

"Coping with some kind of fantasy isn't 'over it'," her voice cracked and wobbled as if it couldn't decide whether to be angry or sad. He wanted to sympathize, he was sure he'd feel just as upset if she were the one going off the rails, except he wasn't.

"It's not a fantasy and I'd like it if you'd quit treating me like I was nuts. Do you see any bloodstains on the floor?" He felt very grateful to Lys for cleaning up earlier. At last, his tired mind remembered that Lys just happened to be standing in the next room (or listening at the door), he could lay this thing to rest once and for all.

"Look, you're already here, so why don't I--"

Al jolted up. "Do what?"

"Introduce you to...stop looking at me like that."

She raised her hands and then pushed them into her coat pockets. "I knew this was a mistake."

"I'm not crazy, damn it. How can you possibly say that after everything we've been through? You know me better than that."

"I thought I did." She took a step back. "Just let me--"

"Will you two please stop it!" A lighter voice, but no less weighty screamed over the two of them making them freeze. Jack closed his eyes, a pained expression on his face. When he opened them again, he could see Allison looking at the source of the sudden outburst, completely expressionless save for her mouth which was hanging wide open like it wanted to say something. Lys stood at the doorway to the bedroom in her shorts, wearing his repro Judas Priest ``Defenders of the Faith '' shirt, claws clenched into fists with a demanding look on her scaly face. Her tail flitted behind her in short spasms while her eyes kept darting back and forth between them from her narrowed eyeridges. The silence broke with a loud thumping as the downstairs neighbor weighed in on the matter and everyone glanced at the floor until the sound passed.

Allison went back to looking at the creature in the doorway, not even three feet tall yet commanding in appearance. "Oh my God," she finally managed to say. Her mouth hung open. "It's real."

Lys dropped the 'angry bold' routine and smiled as warmly as she could, something Jack had caught her practicing in the bathroom mirror several times, she looked friendly, or so he thought.

"Hello Allison." The kobold would have gone on with the introduction, but Al's look of shock changed to sheer panic, Lys stepped back towards the bedroom, worried that Al might scream or worse. However, her attention was focused on Jack as she turned around, raising a hand towards him. "Don't you freaking da--"

He shuffled in place and started singing. "I wanna hold your hand, I haven't been the same m--"

She swung her fist in his general direction. "You never ever miss your shot, do you? The place could be on fire and you'd still take the tame to make that goddamned joke."

Lys leaned to the side, peering past Allison to see Jack grinning, holding his hands up in defense which only made her more confused.

"I tried being serious earlier, but it didn't work out," he said, still grinning.

Al kept her fists ready while she stared razor blades into him. "God, I hate it when you do that. It wasn't funny the first hundred times you did it...I used to like that song."

"Is this a human friendship thing?" Lys asked.

Allison raised her fist at Jack again and scoffed. "No, it's a 'Jack being an asshole like usual' thing," she said without skipping a beat.

Lys smirked. "I know a lot about that."

Al laughed and nodded. "Yeah, I bet you d--" her words and smile died on her lips.

"I'm sorry," Lys said softly.

"You don't have anything to be sorry about, sweetheart," Jack chimed in. Al looked ill at the sound of his words and her face scrunched up.

"Yeah, I don't think I want to be part of this," she said and started for the door.

"Al, wait!"

"No. You two can do whatever the hell you want, this is disgusting and I don't want to be part of it. Goodbye Jack." She opened and closed the front door in an almost singular motion. Jack stared at the knob, hand extended in a pleading motion and then he shrugged in defeat.

"I guess that's that then." Now he got to relive losing his best friend for the second time in a single night. Lys came over and motioned for him to kneel down for a hug. No matter what else happened the way she put her entire body in her hugs made him feel like he could weather anything.

"Maybe not," Lys said with a smile.

"I really don't think she's coming back. She won't be speaking to me for a long time either, maybe never." He patted her on the head while Lys's smile turned to a grin. He looked at her confused until she pointed at the couch. Allison's phone lay there, alone and forgotten. Jack started to smile along with her, both obviously thinking along the same lines.

"This is a bad idea," he said.

Lys nodded. "Yes."

"She's going to be pissed."

"She already looked pissed to me."

"True enough," Jack said as he sat on the couch and waited. A few minutes later a familiar, agitated knock sounded at the front door. He made no effort to answer and so it came again and then again.

"Jack, come open this door."

"I don't think I should, I wouldn't want you to be disgusted."

"Quit screwing around and give me back my damn phone!"

He opened it a tiny crack just to peek and then feigned surprise, flinging it wide, greeting his ex-best friend with a pleasant smile. "Why Al--"

"Just give me my phone so I can get out of here."

"I don't have it."

Her face became a mask of bad intentions. "Do not screw with me."

"She has it." Jack pointed at Lys who was sitting on a raised chair at the kitchen counter, all the way across the room. The kobold waved at her.

"Then tell her to give it to me," Al said through clenched teeth.

"Are you four years old? You go ask her; she doesn't bite, hard." Jack stepped aside with a sweeping hand, welcoming her inside. Lys watched the brown-haired woman look at the threshold between the front door and living room. Al turned her gaze back to Lys and raised her hands to her mouth to call out.

"Can you co--"

The drumline of Saint Anger flushed out her voice, startling them both, but Lys caught on fast and raised a claw to her metaphorical ear indicating she couldn't hear. Meanwhile, Jack rocked out with a huge grin on his face and his hand on the stereo's volume.

Allison raised her arm in a threatening gesture, but it did no good. With no other course left she stepped into the apartment and crossed into the kitchen, looking solemn despite her obvious irritation. Jack killed the music and Al muttered something under her breath he couldn't quite hear, something that made Lys look rather upset. Jack watched his mate brace herself while giving as best a smile she could.

"Can I have it, please?" Al asked.

Lys closed her claw around it gently, it was thick and heavy in her hand, probably expensive. She took her time, passing it from one claw to the other before dropping it into Al's palm.

"Thank you," Al muttered.

"You're welcome, Allison." Jack watched her shudder at the sound of her name. She focused on the phone and turned around to leave. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Lys's eyeridges sharpening into a glare and the unmistakable sound of a tail striking the back of the chair in agitation. "Why would Jack want to stay friends with someone like you?"

Al stopped in her tracks, gripping her phone tight enough that Jack could hear the plastic strain. This hadn't been part of the plan, at least part of his plan, but someone in his head told him to let things play out for now.

"What did you say?" Allison asked, turning around again.

"You heard what Lys, I mean I said." Lys climbed up onto the counter so she could look down at her, claws clinched and tail whipping about. "You came all the way over here just to yell at Jack and then you said I was disgusting. You were right, you are a bitch."

Jack's jaw hung open and he found it difficult to take a breath; he didn't know Lys had it in her.

"I'm a bitch because my friend, sorry, my ex-friend is some pervert? I'm not going to let a dumpster diver like you judge me and I'll thank you for keeping your nose out of conversations that don't concern you!" She stomped over to the counter. "You've only known him for three weeks and you're ready to pick out curtains."

Lys cocked her head. "What do curtains have to do with Jack?"

"Never mind. The point is that you only like him because he feeds you and he's desperate."

"Hey!"

"Jack be quiet," Lys said calmly before turning back to Allison. "You don't know anything. You don't know what it's like to see him just before he wakes up in the morning, you don't know how it feels for him to smile at you just because. You don't know...what it means when he tells me that I deserve to be happy; you probably don't even know what love is. Who would ever love someone like you?!" Her voice raised until it echoed off the walls. Jack just wanted to grab her up right then and there, forget everything else, but there was the matter of two people fighting loudly in his apartment and the fact that someone might call the cops.

Al snorted with a smug look on her face. "As a matter of fact, I do know what he looks like before he wakes up, lizard. He drools." She winced at the memory.

"It's cute! And my name isn't 'lizard' it's Lys."

Jack began rubbing his temples.

"Really, the government should have done something about you things decades ago and I don't mean a housing program."

"And what do you mean, smoothskin?"

"Is that supposed to be an insult?"

"Oh, Lys is sorry." She took a step towards the edge of the counter. "Bitch."

Allison put her phone away and stepped closer to Lys so that the two were snout to nose and poked a finger into her scaly chest. "You're in way over your pointy little horns sister and you better back the hell off before I show just how much of a bitch I can be." Al pressed, making her stumble backwards. It was about time to break this up.

Lys looked surprised, but only for a moment. The kobold hunched down, teeth bares and ready to pounce. "Show me and I'm not your sister."

Now it was definitely time to break this up. "Alright, come on guys." He moved towards the two ladies before they could murder each other. Allison dipped into her coat pocket, pulling out a small, black object with prongs on the end. Jack couldn't see it well enough to tell what it was until she tapped the button. A very loud, threatening crackle shook his ears, startling him. "When the hell did you buy a stun gun?" He stepped in between the two of them and eyed the crackling thing in her hand with a raised eyebrow. "You were going to zap me with that thing, weren't you?"

"Shut up, do you not notice that your animal of a girlfriend is trying to attack me?" She kept the button pressed down, causing bright arcs to dance across the prongs making him back up until he bumped into the counter.

He turned about to reason with Lys who looked intimidated by the sound until she heard what Al had said. She bobbed and weaved, trying to figure out a way around him. "Move!"

"Both of you are acting like animals, now knock it off before--"

Her maw dropped open while her arms went limp, dangling beside her. "What did you say?"

"I said knock it off."

Her tail thrashed back and forth and he could see her eyes glisten. "No, you said Lys is an animal."

"No, I said you were acting like an animal, big difference."

"No difference!" She shoved him full force and off balance, right towards Allison. Someone in his mind with a keen sense of foresight already knew what was coming and sent the signal to brace. He closed his eyes as he fell backwards and waited for the inevitable.

"Ahh, shit!" Agony coursed through his rear, his hip seized, and he toppled into Al who tried to push him back to his feet while keeping the button held down on the stun gun.

"Oh God, sorry." She let it fall to the floor with a thud and so did he. The kitchen floor wasn't any kinder to his backside.

"Jack!" Lys leapt off of the counter and ran over, hugging him roughly about the neck. "What happened? What was that?"

Jack tried to catch his breath in between Lys half-strangling him. "Just an electric shock, I'll be fine, maybe."

The kobold nuzzled into him and began to sob. "Every time I get mad you get hurt."

He laid his hand on the sobbing kobold while he propped himself up. "You had some help," he said as he glared up at Al. She grabbed up the stun gun and pocketed it, looking away like nothing had happened.

"I don't care and stop joking." Lys struck him lightly on the chest. Her voice came out muffled as she continued to sob into his neck. "A stupid animal." Jack stroked her head softly and tried to reassure her, but she was inconsolable, shaking her head at his words and repeating herself. Allison watched the scene on the kitchen floor, at first with her hands in her pockets, trying to maintain a look of disinterest and then brushing at her hair before wiping her cheeks.

"Good lord Jack, what have you gotten yourself into?"

"A relationship."

She laughed and nodded. "Yeah. God, I don't know about this." Al wrapped her arms about herself. "Lys, you're not an animal."

The kobold stopped, untucking her head from Jack's neck to look up at her. "You said L-I was."

"I was angry and you were going to attack me." A bit of fire came back to her voice.

The kobold stood up proper, her tail twitched. "Don't call me an animal then."

"Don't call me a bitch then."

Jack stood up. "You two--"

A bang came from downstairs, getting louder with each strike until it shook the loose articles around the apartment and just when it seemed like the floor might give way it stopped.

"You two need to knock it off before they call the cops," Jack screamed under his breath. "Come on, you're so close to kissing and making up, don't ruin it now."

Lys bared her teeth in a snarl. "Ick, I'm not kissing her, why would you say that?"

"He doesn't mean literally. She doesn't do well with idioms, does she? Anyway, I think she's closer to biting my leg. Maybe I should just go." She turned to leave.

"Yeah, you should and don't come back," Lys said.

Jack didn't have time to chide her before Al did a one-eighty. "On second thought, I think we need to settle this." She wore an agitated smile on her face while Lys's features drooped in disappointment. Jack knew this routine all too well. Al hated to lose, to anyone for any reason. She'd become best friends with Lys just to spite her, but he could use that energy to his advantage.

"That's a good idea, why don't we start with something simple like apologies?"

"I'm sorry, Jack," Al said quickly.

"Me too, sorry Jack."

"Not to me you smartasses."

The two of them looked at each other like they'd just been sentenced to a fate worse than death. Both parties exchanged scowls, sideways glances, and everything else but words. He felt like a nanny in charge of two quarreling siblings. "You two owe me. My ass is still numb and I'll probably never be able to sit properly ever again."

Allison toyed with her hair for some time before blowing it out of her face and then tugging it back, saying not a word. He'd never seen her act this immature before.

"You want to go to time out?" Jack asked.

"You want me to shock you again?"

He could already see Lys getting worried. "She's just joking, I think."

Allison licked her lips several times and nodded this way and that, her eyes rolled skyward and then finally. "I'm sorry, Lys."

Jack cleared his throat. "For?"

"Calling you an animal," she said in a low register.

"Very good, we're making real progress here." He started to give a round of applause, but Allison went for her pocket. Jack turned his attention to his hot-tempered mate, the kobold's tail curled about her leg and she poked at a loose scale on her arm and seemed content to do so for the rest of the night. He leaned towards her, making sure she could see him. "Lys?"

"I'm...sorry for calling you a bitch."

"Now that wasn't so hard, was it?"

Those sharp, pointed teeth revealed themselves again in a nasty frown and her tongue flicked in his direction like she'd just flipped him off. She looked up at Allison. "Maybe you should shock him again."

He smiled nervously. "See? You two will be getting along in no time so long as you have me to beat on." He rubbed his rear for emphasis and took a seat at the counter with a slight groan and Lys took a seat next to him. He spied the stereo clock across the room, 12:01. "Now I don't want to be a drag, but it's getting late, but I would really like it if maybe, just maybe we can end tonight on a happier note?" His smile turned into a sheepish grin.

Al checked her phone to verify. "Jesus, I got work in the morning." She looked like she wanted to split (she'd looked that way most of the night), but she went and leaned against the counter to be a good sport. "You've really been here these past three weeks?"

Lys nodded and grinned, looking rather proud of her ability to stay hidden. "Jack told me you were happy that he'd found someone and bothered to clean up this place."

"Yeah, I guess I did say that."

"You don't like me, do you?"

She looked stunned at the question and her hand started to toy with her hair, but she caught herself. "I don't know yet, we just met and kind of got off on the wrong foot."

"More like the wrong rear, still stings by the way," Jack said.

"You're not gonna let this go, are you?"

"I'm kind of attached to my butt."

Lys started snickering, but Al didn't seem so amused. She looked at her while she pointed at Jack. "This is what I had to put up with when we were all living together during college."

"Why is that a bad thing?"

"Try it for several semesters and you'll find out. Also, I don't get how you fall in love with a human and in, what? Two, three weeks?"

"Do humans choose when they fall in love?" Lys asked with a hint of defiance.

"They don't even choose why they fall in love," Al said, casting a sideways glance towards her best friend. "But with him?"

"Hey!" Jack leaned over and swatted at Al, who managed a half-smirk. In a way he felt hopeful, if she was relaxed enough to make jokes at his expense then maybe not all was lost.

"Just wait until you've spent a year with him, you'll want to zap him on a daily basis. At least he doesn't stay out until 2 drinking anymore. I used to have to--

"Okay, okay, let's save that story for another time," Jack said.

The kobold laughed. "How long have you known him?"

"Since high school," the brown-haired woman said with an exaggerated groan. "I don't know if that means anything to you."

"We don't have any school, humans keep trying to get us into, what did you call it? Programs? I never knew anyone who did it."

"You seem pretty well-spoken, no offense."

"I don't mind, my parents and friends taught me what they knew and they were pretty smart and Lys-I've been learning all I can while I've been here."

Al smirked. "Be careful, he almost flunked English. Speaking of living, does anyone else know about this?" She looked up at Jack.

"Just a few people at the convenience store, and a beat cop, and a spooked elderly couple in the park."

She sighed. "Just say no then." Al looked the two of them over again, first at Jack and then at Lys, they followed her eyes back to each other and then hugged, making her frown slightly. "Do you have any idea what you're going to tell your parents? I'm sure they're just going to love this."

"I asked him the same thing earlier," Lys said before giving him a playful tap on the leg. "You don't really mean they'll love it, do you?" She asked with a slight hope.

Allison gave her a knowing half-smile.

The kobold closed her eyes and held her claws together, toying with them. "I don't think we're so different, I don't believe my parents would be happy to hear about me picking a human mate." The last few words came out slow. "It would still be nice to have someone of my kind be happy for me." She glanced towards the front door, almost staring past it, looking all the sadder.

Jack brushed her arm and began to rub her shoulders. "Is something wrong?"

"There was...no, nothing." She looked away.

Jack looked up at Al who shrugged and then she went for her phone again. "I'd like to keep this up, but it really is getting late and I have to be at work at 6 tomorrow. God, I hate opening."

"Why are you still working at Teeno's? I thought you had a new job lined up?"

"I did, but it was going to be out of state."

"So? You didn't suffer through college to serve coffee to cranky old people in the morning for the rest of your life."

She hesitated and put her phone away. "It just didn't seem right...for me, why?"

"Nothing." He noticed Lys watching the two of them back and forth, all he could offer was a nudge and an eyeroll.

"Alright then, that's enough fun for one night." Allison turned to leave once more.

"Wait, what are you going to do, Allison?" Lys asked.

With a sigh she turned back around. "What do you mean?"

"About this?"

"I still don't know what you mean."

"About me and Jack."

Jack looked a bit confused as did Al, but he thought about it. "She's right though, what are you going to do?"

She ran her hands through her hair. "Well, I'm not gonna say 'whatever makes you happy' and call it good. I mean, I'm happy you haven't gone nuts, at least not completely. I still don't know how to feel about this." The brown-haired woman looked at Lys. "No offense, but I still think this whole thing is still..."

"Weird?" Lys asked. "Bad?"

"Maybe."

The kobold grinned at her. "Maybe a little of both?" Al nodded, looking perhaps just a little bit more at ease.

"Okay, I gotta go, goodnight you two, and Jack?"

He perked up at the sound of his name.

"I'm sorry that I..."

He waved it off. "Don't worry about it."

The tired door hinges squeaked open and close, heralding the end of the night. He slumped, almost slipping off the chair as he let out a long sigh. "I think that went pretty well, don't you?"

Lys blinked at him with a flat expression. "That was well? Is it so bad for humans and kobolds to be together?"

"I have no idea, maybe there's some community of kobold lovers out there somewhere we need to hook up with." He opened the fridge and started drinking milk from the carton. "On second thought, maybe we don't want to meet those kinds of people. You ready for bed?"

Lys fidgeted, looking back and forth nervously as her tail curled about her leg again. "I..what if..."

"What is it, sweet?" He closed the fridge and took her in his arms.

"What if every new meeting is like this? Lys doesn't want it to be like this, I don't want to fight everyone in the world."

He squeezed her gently. "It won't be."

"You don't know that."

He kissed her on the head, right between her horns. "The guys at the convenience store didn't fight you."

"But the big, stupid bearded idiot did."

"The police officer didn't."

"But your best friend did."

"People say and do things when they're mad, I've told you that." Lys sniffled and continued to tremble in his arms. "Besides, I think you did really well tonight, a little heated perhaps and it did involve me getting zapped in the butt."

She forced a smile and leaned into him. "You never stop joking."

"Nope." He lifted her up. "You'll feel better about it in the morning." Sleep would put things in a much better light for both of them. He carried her to bed, something he truly cherished being able to do. The way she relaxed in his arms spoke volumes of the good it did for her as well.

The lights started to go out in his mind the moment he hit the pillow, but he still had time to groan over the events of the evening. He'd laid his emotions bare to his best friend and she was more worried about getting up to go to work tomorrow. He was on the verge of sleep when his eyes sprang open and the breath caught in his throat.

So did he.